Who Am I? The story of Phoenix Star
by Cute Gallifreyan
Summary: Phoenix Star slowly begins to realize that her past is not what it seems. A greyish Fem Revan tale with a different KOTOR plot and ending that will be considered AU. Carth/Bastila/Revan romance.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Boarding Revan's flagship had been a challenge; we had fought our way through Sith soliders, Dark Jedi and various minions the Dark Lord had thrown at us. I was a part of a small strike force, it was simple, bold, and daring. Revan didn't believe or didn't think that the Jedi or the Republic would dare strike with a small commando style attack with a few minor Republic soldiers and three Jedi. I believe the only reason why Revan attacked our group, taking the bait as it were, was because of me. Revan was keenly aware of my talents in the Force. I was the only Jedi, since Nomi Sundrider that had the use of battle meditation. Revan wanted me for my talents as much as the Jedi wanted him. The mission unquestionably was a suicide mission.

The Republic and the Jedi Order purposely leaked information of my whereabouts so Revan would come after me and attack. Our hopes relied on the fact that perhaps Revan would take the bait as a small Republic military Force, a prized padawan such as me, and very little resources to protect me or the fleet would be too tempting a prize to the Dark Lord of the Sith. We were trussed up like a fat Marrovian pig and Revan would strike even on the off chance that it was a trap. The attack caught the Dark Lord off guard as the Republic Elite Force struck back much harder than he expected.

The Elite Force was a group of specially trained Republic Military commandos that went on the motto make do with less and fight back like a rancor. The Military group was much more proactive than most and the commandos of the group were willing to die simply to protect the Republic. Revan was considered a high priority target so the Republic Fleet went all out with this Elite group. Revan simply didn't realize that the Jedi were desperate even desperate enough to risk such a feint against the Sith, with an Elite group of Military and a small showing of Jedi. Yet, here we were, and here I was, the one that the Jedi had pinned all their hopes and dare I say desires on. Desire was close to passion and passion was something of the Dark Side, yet, all the masters and even I knew our peril was great but our cause was just. Perhaps that is what caught Revan off guard.

As we fought closer and closer to the bridge where Revan could be found, the ship shook with heavy weapons fire. Kara, a fellow Padawan stated, "By the Force….I told the captain not to fire on us till we came back with Revan or we died trying."

I turned to Kara, That is not the Republic firing on us, Kara."

Kara frowned, "Then who Bastila?"

I sighed, "Do you not wonder why, it seemed so easy for us to board Revan's ship in the first place?"

Kara wasn't accustomed to such missions as I was, this was her first assignment as a padawan, and I was placed in charge as the experienced padawan. The Order had so few knights that missions that were normally given to knights were now assigned to padawan. This of course, had to deal with Revan's campaign against the Jedi and the Republic. However, this was like having a doubled edged vibroblade against us. Padawan could be easily broken to Revan and Sith conversion techniques. Knights could be broken as well but not as easily. If knights or padawans did not break, we were killed. This sad fact of genocide and conversion was going all over the war front, and the reason as to why the Republic called the war, The Jedi Civil War.

Kara stared at me alarmed, "Easy! We had to fight our way through all those troops that Revan threw at us, and then we had to fight through all those ships that were sent after our strike team ships. I….well I assumed you were using your battle meditation."

I shook my head, "I was using my battle meditation earlier, but right now I haven't had a chance to concentrate on the battle all that much and I had to break the meditation as soon as we boarded. I've been focusing more on us and using my Force meditations to aid us in our combat. It is obvious Kara…." I paused and then said solemnly, "Betrayal is a trait of the Sith."

Kara looked incredulously at me, "You mean, Malak would fire on his own master?!"

Talon, the other Jedi under my lead said calmly, "Master Zhar has told me, there are no loyalties with the Dark side. The Dark side is so apparently fickle that apprentices would destroy their own masters."

I nodded, "Indeed so, Talon. It makes little sense to me but apparently, Malak feels that Revan has taught him all that he need know. But come along you two, enough talk we are here to try to bring Revan to justice not to discuss the finer points of Sith philosophy.

Both of the Padawans nodded at me and we continued through the ship as it shook from bombardment. Alarms blared and it seemed that the Sith were suddenly more concerned keeping the ship together than facing off against three Jedi padawan. We encountered a few troops the nearer we got to the bridge and we quickly dispatched them. Feelings of darkest dread filled me as we approached the bridge, the Dark side permeated thickly through this whole segment of the ship. I felt as though a dark wet blanket threatened to overwhelm me. This was it, Revan undoubtedly lay beyond this door. I looked at Kara and Talon and we all mustered whatever strength we had and I plunged my lightsaber into the lock of the bridge and forced the door open.

The three of us stared upon the scene, Dark Jedi and a person in dark robes and a mask whose presence chilled me to my very core.

There were no words as suddenly the Dark Jedi charged upon me and the others. Their aggression was fierce as we countered their blades. The ship listed as Malak fired yet again. Revan snarled and I could hear the snarl coming from the Dark Lord's lips. Suddenly, Kara moaned as the Dark Jedi's blade met its mark and her features paled as she sunk to the ground mortally wounded. "Kara!" I wanted to run to her side and help her but I could not. Talon and I fought the rest of the Dark Jedi and as I killed the one who barred the way to Revan, Talon suddenly fell to the ground along with his opponent both dead.

Revan ignited his lightsaber and stood to face me.

"You cannot win Revan!"

I flung my lightsaber with the Force towards Revan, ready to at least give him one firm strike with my blade. I tried to sound braver than my words, but I was afraid. Revan was tried and tested in combat as well as a master at war and tactics. He had fought against the Mandalorians, he even had fought a duel with Mandalore, himself as a way to end the war. Revan had slain the man. I had wondered if that act alone had caused the once noble knight to fall or if it was something else. I wished I could see the man behind the mask, what sort of man would slay people and do it so willingly? Was Revan's soul really as dark and lost to the Dark side as the Jedi claimed? The Jedi wanted Revan alive. Perhaps there was hope that Revan's soul could be redeemed. War had made the former Jedi dark and black as night. The Council and even I agreed that we needed to remove Revan from this environment of war and bring him to a place of peace, and then perhaps there would be hope for his redemption. My heart ached with hope that maybe I would get lucky and my Force flung blade would meet its mark and disable the Sith Lord.

The Dark Lord was about to block my lightsaber blow with his own blade, when suddenly the bridge lit up and blinded me. Malak had fired a direct turbo laser hit upon the bridge of Revan's flagship. The attack caused me to fall over, and I felt dazed. It felt like a lifetime before I could move and my head was spinning. I looked around me trying to get my bearings straight. As I looked around me, on the floor beside me was the Dark Lord. His Life was slowly oozing away, and it seemed like such an ignoble end for someone who was once such a great hero to the Republic. I felt a great deal of sadness and remorse. Who was Revan? I knew so little about Revan aside from the stories on his tactics and his battles against the Mandalorians. He was a great leader of men and now I stood before him.

I stood there and my resolve suddenly grew. I decided right on the spot, that I could not let this great hero of the Republic die. My heart and my conscience couldn't let this man die such a horrible death. So very quietly I lifted the mask that covered Revan's face, a face that I doubted had seen any sort of light since the Mandalorian wars.

Much to my shock and perhaps even to my horror I saw the pale and sickly face of a woman underneath that ominous mask. I gasped in surprise; here was a woman who looked only about five to ten years older than me. Impossible! All the intelligence I had on Revan painted the leader of the Mandalorian wars as a man. I stood dumbstruck staring at this unknown figure, apparently a woman with short clipped black hair and a massive head wound on the side of her head. How could the Jedi not know of this? Yet, maybe the masters did, they spoke of Revan as if he...umm… she was another person entirely.

Slowly it began to dawn on me, due to the personage before me, I really knew very little about Revan. There was Revan the legend, the myth, and….obviously Revan, the true person. I stood staring at the true Dark Lord of the Sith and seemed amazed and questions filled my head. Who was she truly? Why did she go off to war? Why did she turn? Finally, the last question I had was why the massive deception? Female Jedi weren't unheard of, obviously, as I was one. Yet, somehow this woman had gone out of her way to paint herself as a man, a Sith Lord. Perhaps it was the title "Lord" that made Revan go out of her way to paint herself in such an extreme manner. Dark Lords were common, Dark Ladies? Well not so much. Yet the last Sith Lord was Exar Kun so perhaps, Revan was trying to fashion herself after Exar in such a way that even her very identity ended up muddled and obscured.

I sighed and bent down and cradled her head in my hands, she moaned, her voice very human and very much weakened. "Please…." her voice cracked in pain, "Don't let…..Malak…..must keep….the order of the galaxy intact."

I frowned, that didn't seem like a Sith to me, it seemed almost Jedi-like in nature. I shushed her words, "Revan you're dying!"

Her lips cracked out a laugh, "Obviously. Are you here to celebrate my death and defeat? Like the hypocrite of a Jedi you are! Maybe you should thank my apprentice, Malak for that. Your wonderful pseudo pacifistic Order can give him an award for my death!"

I shook my head in the negative. I was shocked to hear such an acerbic tone from the Dark Lord. I stroked her hair, trying to bring a measure of peace to the dying Sith Lord, "By the Force, no. I came to..." I paused in thought, what was my mission to begin with? Oh yes, to bring Revan to justice. However, I wasn't so sure anymore. The Force trembled within me and I echoed and listened to the words that the Force gave me to speak. The Force guided me at this moment and the words suddenly came out of my mouth filled with one desire. "I am here to save you."

Revan sighed, "Save me? You can't even save yourself little Jedi. My ship is doomed, I am doomed. My death….my men….they….will surrender…and follow Malak….and...then you will die." She suddenly coughed and blood came pouring from her lips.

I stroked her black hair back so I could examine her head wound, "I thought…."

"You thought what…." The Dark Lord said. I didn't answer as I tore a piece of my Jedi robe and bound up her wounded head, "Oh….." she responded, "That I was a man." She laughed, "All part of my mystique, dear little Jedi. We all wear….masks….even you, I imagine. Your mask, such calm, such resolve, yet I can tell that is a lie. You are conflicted, you crave conflict, and you managed to convince your masters that you could go after me." She laughed a dark throaty laugh. However the laugh was interrupted with a cough, and with that cough, more blood came pouring out of her lips. She finally sighed, "Who I was, who I am… that was...yet….another mask I wore."

I shook my head as I scanned her over with the Force, there were several internal injuries that would need tending to on the main Republic ship, assuming I made it back in one piece.

Revan's eyes slowly began to roll back into her skull. Her will was strong but she was fading. I gritted my teeth together, "Oh no you don't!" My body began to glow with the Force; I refused to let her die and my will, my very essence suddenly poured into her. My body felt hot and glowing and I felt her and me. Her will and my will fought hard. She wanted to die, I wanted her to live. Suddenly, both our wills combined together and she suddenly submitted to mine as she was slowly too weak to fight back against my will.

I blinked, the bridge consumed itself in flames and I must have been so completely absorbed in the Force and saving Revan I had completely ignored my current environment. I looked at Revan, she was alive, but apparently comatose. I scanned her once more just to make sure, yes, she was alive but I couldn't do anymore for her, and I felt drained. Of my own strength and life, I had given it as freely as a gift, and to her it was just barely enough to keep her alive.

I looked around and tried to scan with what little Force I had left to me. The ship seemed abandoned but what was I going to tell the Republic captain or the others? I had spared Revan, well that was what Jedi did, but I suddenly feared, that if I brought a half dead Sith Lord with me, they might decide that a near dead Sith Lord was better off dead, and then my desire to keep Revan alive would all be in vain. Revan would be afforded leniency by the Jedi, but she was still a Republic criminal. If I couldn't bring Revan back alive and I brought a comatose and near death Sith Lord to them, they might decide to kill her to save time on the trial. The Republic and Jedi Order's relationship was a bit strained at this time. It all seemed so very complicated. Jedi try not to do galactic politics but, the Republic wanted Revan dead and the Jedi wanted Revan alive. The Republic didn't think the order could bring back Revan alive and so allowed the Order to go after the Sith Lord. I smiled a grim smile, I had proved the Republic wrong, I had Revan, as half dead as she was, alive.

Although the Republic task force was under my command, I was too tired to tell them not to finish the job Malak had done to Revan. I went over to Kara, her body still lay on the floor. "Forgive me Sister Jedi." as I quietly un-robed the dead Padawan. I then quietly stripped Revan of her dark robes and dressed her in Kara's robes. I managed to quietly braid what was left of Revan's hair into a Padawan's braid and I looked over my work. Revan looked like, well she looked like a half-dead Padawan and that was the image I wanted, it would have to do till I got Revan back to Dantooine to a real proper healer.

Hopefully, the Republic would assume that Revan was Kara. It was a long shot but, if I had thought Revan was a man, then perhaps so would the small Republic task force I was with.

I quietly picked up Revan and hoisted her upon my back and picked up Revan's mask and carried it with me. I almost forgot, I needed my lightsaber, if I went back to the Jedi without my lightsaber I would never hear the end of it from the masters. I had constantly gotten the lecture about, a lightsaber being your life and to be separated from it could mean the difference between life and death. I sighed, my load was heavy as it was, but I did not wish to be scolded for not having my lightsaber. I cringed as I saw it, apparently in the blast of Malak's explosion it was torn into shreds. So much for having a lightsaber, I would have to construct another. Although I could take any of the lightsabers from Kara, Talon, or even the Dark Jedi, a Jedi is only complete with their own constructed lightsaber. Any other lightsaber, would not feel right.

The lightsaber was more than just the crystal and the focusing lens; it also contained a small bit of your own Force energy. It made the blade unique to its user and I could not take the lightsabers from Kara or Talon and definitely not from the Dark Jedi. I suppose I would still get the lecture about having no lightsaber on me. I sighed, but then again I had succeeded in my mission and maybe I would be spared that lecture.

I stumbled through the burning wreckage of Revan's warship with Revan on my back. I finally got back to my shuttle and laid Revan down into a bunk in the back. I wasn't much of a pilot, because Talon was more into piloting than I was, but with Talon dead, it was up to me to get back to the Republic fleet. No sooner had I left, Revan's ship exploded into a fiery fireball.

I commed the Republic fleet, "This is Bastila Shan of the Jedi Order. Mission complete, Revan is dead. Repeat Revan is dead, and I have one wounded Jedi with me."


	2. Chapter 1: First Lies

**Chapter One: First Lies**

Captain Firrian frowned as I showed him Revan's mask as proof the Dark Lord was dead. He scratched his head, "You're a plucky Jedi, I'll give you credit for that. I didn't think you had it in you to kill one of your own."

I glared at him, "I didn't kill Revan. Malak did. Malak fired on us while I was on the ship. I…." my glare went sour, "I wanted Revan alive, Captain Firrian. I don't like killing any of our fallen….."

Firrian snorted, "Bah….and I doubt Revan felt the same about you. These Sith want us all dead or to submit to them. I don't get Jedi compassion. You lot are a strange bunch." He took a look at 'Kara' and shook his head, "She looks half dead, and this is what your valued Jedi compassion gets you. Death. There was three of you and now there's just you and this one and she might not survive, judging by how she looks. All this….just to go after one fallen Jedi. How smart is that, Jedi Bastila? No wonder your numbers are dwindling in the universe."

I still felt sour inside about this, I had left Kara dead, naked and stripped of her clothing and Talon. The Captain was right, how many more Jedi would die? I felt like I barely blinked an eye at their deaths. It made me feel cold and hollow inside. I felt as dead, well almost as dead as Revan.

"Captain…" I mulled the words over, "Regardless of the sacrifice from me and the others of the order, the Republic needs us. Kara, Talon and I knew the risk when we became part of the Jedi Order. Sacrifice is a Jedi's lot in life. It's not always pleasant. We always knew that the day might come that we might give our lives in service not just to the order, not just to the republic but to the galaxy itself."

Captain Firiran sighed, "Brave words, hope they comfort you when this gal here dies."

I furrowed my brow suddenly upset, "She's not dead yet, captain and I need you to make all effort to get us back to the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine."

The captain frowned, "Why? Your mission to capture the Dark Lord was a bust and…."

The first lies came so easily to my lips, "Captain, I have information that I downloaded from Revan's ship that I can only deliver personally to the Jedi Masters. It is important to the war effort and to the Republic. As for Kara, she took a really bad blow to her head when Malak's barrage hit the bridge. I doubt there is anything your healers can do for her except to treat her internal injuries. She needs Jedi healers to help heal her mind, assuming..."

"Assuming what?"

I carefully touched Revan's mind, it was all a jumble, a mishmash of memories all out of order and nothing I could fully read. It really was a miracle I had a conversation with her before she succumbed to her injuries. "Her mind is severely damaged, captain. She may never be the same person….ever again."

I suddenly felt sad. I don't know why but my shoulders slumped in sadness and despair. I had my hopes pinned that maybe the Jedi Order could get something out of Revan, but no….that felt like a lie even to me. Something inside me felt pulled to the comatose woman. I had a deep concern over her welfare. I passed it off as tiredness as well as the compassion I had from saving Revan on the bridge of her ship.

The captain frowned seeming to notice my sadness. "I am sorry...I didn't realize you two were close."

I sighed and found half lies, half truths coming to my lips, "I barely knew her, Captain. It's just….it's just this war. I meet new people, get to know them briefly and then they are ripped away from me before I get to know them any better. "

The captain nodded, "If it's any consolation. I know the feeling. I am sorry I seemed harsh earlier. This war has been hard on all of us. If it means anything to you, I will have my own medic look your Jedi companion over."

I wondered if that was such a good idea, did Revan have any medical records in the Republic holonet? What about Kara? I paused in thought and slight fear, I didn't mean to lie but if the Republic knew I had the Sith Lord, I was sure it would not go well for her. They would surely not wait for her to recover, brain damaged or not. She would be deemed guilty of war crimes in absentia and be put to death.

I looked contemplative and thought over what I could do to head this off at the pass. Yet, Revan was in sore need of treatment. I pursed my lips together, "Very well Captain. But let me contact the order so I can get Kara's medical records to you so that your medic will know her medical history."

The captain nodded as I went off to my quarters…..

 **-0o0-**

"Encrypt my message to the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine, route the transmission through the Jedi Temple on Courscant. Jedi holonet priority one."

The transmission went through and suddenly Master Vandar as well as Master Vrook appeared before me.

Vrook's brow furrowed, "This better be important, Bastila, we sent you on a mission to confront and capture Revan. Surely your report could wait till you saw us in person. And why are you routing the call through Courscant?"

"I suspect Padawan Bastila has a reason, Master Vrook. I would advise we hear her out first."

"Thank you, Master Vandar. I have had a recent development that has occurred on my mission. And….I must tread carefully. As you know the Republic have their own reasons for wanting Revan that do not correspond with our own."

Vandar nodded, "Yes, and the Republic wish Revan to stand trial and be put to death for war crimes. Execution is not our way. I have spoken to the chancellor regarding this but he remains firm that Revan will face the most extreme punishment that can be had."

Vrook nodded, "And we can't allow that. If Revan is put to death, we will lose whatever knowledge we may gain from….him."

I coughed, "Master Vrook, it doesn't do any good to call Revan, a him. I know as well as I am sure you and Master Vandar do, that Revan is a woman."

Vrook snorted, "Does it make any difference what….that….creature is? He, she….whatever she wishes to be called is a creature of the Dark Side. She came back from the wars wearing that mask, insisting to be called a him and a Sith Lord, and it's just as well. The Revan I knew….she died a long time ago and was reborn as a Sith. Revan had no problem propagating that lie through the Sith ranks. So we took the same steps with her records. Let the Republic and Sith think she was a man. Let the Jedi, the Masters and the Jedi historians have what remains of her beginnings of her past be honored and valued as a Jedi of the light."

I frowned, was Vrook so concerned about the history of the order that he had taken steps to sanitize Revan's past and her overall history? I knew that many Jedi in our order were ashamed about every fallen Jedi, because they represented the worst aspect of us but surely to make Revan into two different people in the history of the Jedi and the Republic. It felt so very wrong to me and I wondered if someday if I was ever in the official history of the order, would my history would be just as distorted?

I sighed and I didn't want to talk about the morality of altering records or official history at the moment so I cut to the heart of the issue, "Hence the problem I am having Master Vrook. I managed to save her. But I…." I paused a moment, "I may not have been completely truthful about it. Since you all have been hiding Revan's past I took advantage of it. Padawan Kara died during the mission and….well….I..." I bowed my head, "Revan took some severe injuries during the mission. Her own apprentice tried to kill her. So….I dressed her in Kara's robes and…."

Vrook's began to pounce on me, "Bastila you did what? That woman is undeserving of wearing our robes and not just any robes but the robes of a dead…."

Vandar held up his hand, "Peace Master Vrook, Bastila only did what was expedient and it was a wise decision she made. The Republic must continue to think Revan is dead. Our only chance to help her and the Republic lay in keeping her alive."

Vrook sighed and held his peace. "How bad are Revan's injuries?"

"She is comatose, Master Vrook. Her mind is all jumbled and damaged. I doubt we will get any useful information from her. Captain Firrian wishes to treat her internal injuries but…." I sighed, "They need the right medical records. I assume you can give me the right medical records under Kara's name."

Vandar nodded, "You will have the medical records you need within an hour, Bastila."

I bowed respectfully before Vandar and Vrook, "Thank you Masters. May the Force be with you…."

"May the Force be with you as well, Padawan Bastila."

The transmission ended and I felt confused, since when did the Jedi traffic with deceptions as so readily as Revan had? The whole thing left my head spinning, but then this was war and even in war, things that would normally be wrong during peacetime ended up being bent in a strange sort of shadow morality.


	3. Chapter 2: Two Lives

**Chapter Two: Two Lives**

I stood watching as Revan floated so peaceful, so calm in a Kolto tank on Dantooine or peacefully laying on a bed. Already the signs of Dark Side corruption were fading away from her features. She looked like every other wounded Jedi that I had seen come into the medical facilities in the Jedi Enclave. The masters were beginning to talk though because I came here every day for almost a month to check on Revan and her medical progress.

Every day I asked the Master Jedi healer, a rather matronly woman named Jula Jax, the same question if there had been any change, any progress with Revan's healing. The healer would shake her head solemnly and said there had been no change in Revan's mind despite the fact that the Kolto had healed all the physical damage within Revan's mind.

I sat by her bed and I sang to her. Something compelled me to sing to her. I knew so few songs, but I remembered songs, songs that my father sang to me as a child. I sang her the song my father had sung to me before he handed me over to the Jedi as a child. I would sing and quietly hold Revan's hand.

Be still, my love  
I will return to you  
However far you feel from me  
You are not alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching you  
Speak to me.

I can't let go  
you're every part of me  
The space between is just a dream  
You will never be alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching

We are one breath apart, my love  
And I'll be holding it in 'til we're together  
Hear me call your name  
Just speak, speak to me, speak to me, speak

I feel you rushing all through me  
In these walls, I still hear your heartbeat  
And nothing in this world can hold me back  
From breaking through to you…..

I had almost forgotten the song but I knew songs could be heard through the Force. They could provide healing and perhaps I vainly hoped that Revan might respond to my voice.

For a moment, although maybe I imagined it, I thought Revan's hand briefly touched my hand. I called over Jula to check on Revan and she sighed and shook her head negatively about any sort of movement. Yet I felt something, I was sure of it.

"Why are you so fixated on this woman, Bastila? Every day you come. Every day! Such attachments are not healthy. It's as if….."

"As if...what?"

"I've only seen such devotion from Jedi when the Jedi in treatment is a Master or an apprentice. Did something happen when you saved this woman's life?"

I paused in thought, "I don't know Jula. It happened so very fast with me saving Revan. I acted on instinct. I am not a proper healer. I have had basic training but….I simply desired for her life to be spared and the next thing I knew I felt my Force, my will, pour into her wishing her to live. The next thing I knew, she was still alive."

Jula nodded, "It sounds like you've developed a Force bond, Bastila."

I raised an eyebrow, "Jula, is their anyway to get rid of it? I don't want to be tied to…..well I don't wish to be tied to the Dark Lord of the Sith."

Jula shook her head, "I am afraid there is no way to get rid of it. The Force ordains these things for a reason Bastila. The only way it goes away is you distance yourself from her. Which considering Revan's condition I do not recommend. She's alive because of you. You poured your essence into her and in so doing you linked yourself to her. Breaking that bond now, with Revan so very weak and fragile may very well kill her."

I sighed, "I don't think the Masters would want that and after all the effort I went through to get Revan back, I don't wish for her to die. Is there any other methods to break the bond say when Revan heals?"

Jula looked at me warily, "The only other way to break it is…." She paused, "You would have to step farther away from your current alignment in the Force."

I shivered a moment, "So you mean….the Dark…."

Jula nodded and said nothing more.

I gave a rather weary sigh "It appears that I have no choice but to be bonded to Revan although the prospect of being tied to her is not something I am enamored with."

Jula nodded, "Perhaps it is for the best Bastila. Revan is going to need your strength in the days to come."

I raised an eyebrow, "Days to come? Jula, what have the Masters been talking to you about? I get the impression that you know something."

Jula looked thoughtful, "Perhaps. The Masters wish Revan to be healed both body and spirit and you may have a part to play in that. Any more than that, I really can't say. I don't know a whole lot at the moment but do know that the Masters have asked me for my services in Revan's healing. I am not sure what they wish for me or what that will entail but I trust in their wisdom and I will do whatever the will of the Force wishes of me."

I nodded, "I see, Master Healer Jax. I suppose we shall both have to trust in the wisdom of the Masters. I really must be going.

Jula nodded, "I will see you soon, Padawan Bastila."

* * *

I walked away from the healer's section of the Enclave and needed to see Master Zhar. I had yet to rebuild my lightsaber but my mind had been such a jumble with Revan plus telling the Masters all that had happened with my mission. I knew I really needed a new blade. Master Zhar held the lightsaber crystals and the parts for constructing a lightsaber and so I sought him out.

He was in the sparing room of the enclave and I approached him, "Master Zhar, I lost my lightsaber during my fight with Revan. I need to construct a new lightsaber."

The Twi'lek master nodded, "I was wondering when you would get around to asking me. Is your mind settled and ready to focus on making a new blade?"

"Master?"

"I sense your mind, Bastila and it is troubled. It hasn't stopped being troubled since your mission. You need to be focused and centered when you build your new blade or the lightsaber may not work properly when you construct the blade.

I gave a long sigh, "I suppose I have been a bit distracted after everything that has happened. Can you help me, Master?"

Zhar nodded, "We shall meditate together and find the peace that your mind needs at this time."

A few hours later, Master Zhar smiled at the calm focus that now was a part of me, "You are ready, Bastila. Here is a yellow crystal to reconstruct your blade as well as the parts you need for a lightsaber."

I paused a moment as I felt the components in my hand, "Master, this does not feel right."

Zhar frowned, "What do you mean?"

"I wish…." I paused a moment, "A single blade does not feel right to me somehow. Do you have any more parts?"

Zhar's eyes narrowed, "The twin blades are a construct that many of our fallen brothers and sisters used during the Mandalorian wars. They provided a much more aggressive blade. It is a blade for war."

I looked firmly at Zhar, "Master Zhar, We have been at war. I have been so engaged with Revan's healing, I have not kept up with the war. Has….well has getting rid of Revan….has Malak talked of surrender?"

Zhar shook his head, "I am afraid not. Malak has claimed the title Dark Lord of the Sith for his own and our brothers and sisters are still in danger."

I stood firmly and said to Zhar, "Then give me the parts for a double-bladed lightsaber, Master Zhar. We must prove to Malak and the Sith that we are willing to fight this war."

Zhar's eyes looked at me firmly. "This is a new attitude I have seen from you Bastila. I do not like it. Perhaps your confrontation with Darth Revan has made you…."

I suddenly lashed out, "Master Zhar you are the second person today who has said something similar to me about me and…. **that** woman in our medical wing."

Zhar bowed his head humbly, "I know we asked you about what happened, Bastila but clearly your confrontation with her has visibly upset you."

I sighed and took a few measured meditative breaths, "I am sorry. It's just that….all this time I was told something else about Revan and I found out the truth about…..her and…..well I am just a bit shaken up about it."

Zhar nodded, "A lot of the truths we hold onto Bastila are based on beliefs that are impressed upon us by others, it is this certain point of view….." he paused seeming to sense that I was having trouble comprehending what he was saying, "May I ask you why you decided to dress Revan up as a padawan when you escaped her flagship?"

"Because I knew the Republic couldn't handle…." I finally understood what Zhar was saying, "The truth or the real truth would have lead to her being killed."

Zhar nodded, "So you kept holding onto a view of the truth that was vital not just to us but to you."

I still wasn't sure I completely understood this, but I did know that Revan's life was dependent on the success or failure of the Jedi Order and with it the Republic. If I had allowed the truth, the real truth to come out, we would have been doomed to failure.

"I am not sure I fully understand, Master, but I will try and meditate later on your words. Anyway….about my blade."

Zhar sighed, "We both agree that you need a lightsaber blade and I will not deny you your blade. However, be warned such a blade can lead you to a much aggressive posture as a Jedi and can lead to the Dark Side."

I frowned in thought, how could a simple double blade lead to the Dark Side? "Master Zhar, a lightsaber is a tool. It is neither good nor evil. It is the wielder of the blade that can channel that which is light or that which is dark."

"I suppose such logic can be applied, Padawan Bastila. Yet, I would not be a proper master to warn you of those practitioners of the twin blades."

"I will heed your warning, Master Zhar and will keep myself focused in the light."

"That is all I ask of you, Bastila."

I bowed before Master Zhar as he handed me the parts for a double-bladed lightsaber.

* * *

Master Dorak stood quietly flipping through old profiles of deceased, listings of missing or lost individuals from the Mandalorian war. I noticed that he was primarily focused on women's profiles.

He smiled softly as I waited patiently outside the door of his study.

"Ahh Bastila, I wanted to talk to you. Come in, Padawan."

I entered and he said, "Come, child, have a seat, I wish to discuss our current situation with…." he paused a moment, "Our patient in the medical wing."

I took a seat near his desk.

"Master Healer Jax has told me you seem to have a very strong connection with her."

I nodded.

"Since you are bonded to her, it is best to let you know that the Masters and I have decided on a course of action with her."

"And?"

"Revan's mind according to Healer Jax is far too damaged. She may sit here for years and years before her mind truly heals. We simply can't wait that long. We need to know where she and Malak are getting their fleet. We know the ships are of an unusual design and not even in our records or the records of the Republic. We have to know where Revan and Malak are getting their support. It is the wisdom of the council here and on Coruscant that we speed up Revan's recovery."

"How can this be done, Master Dorak?"

"We plan on giving a set of memories to Revan to help her broken mind grab onto something. According to Healer Jax, this will speed up Revan's healing considerably. However…."

I could sense that there was something about this that felt off, "However?"

"Well, we cannot trust, Revan's true memories, Bastila. We cannot take the risk of a willful defiant Dark Lord of the Sith will be the person we will be dealing with when Revan wakes up. So, it is also the wisdom of the council to lay a foundation of a new identity and memories over her old ones."

"But Master, if we are not dealing with Revan's true memories, how will we ever find out about Revan's fleet?"

Dorak sighed, "This is where you come in Bastila. Since you have a bond, an affinity for her, it is our hope that you will be able to draw out Revan's memories."

"But won't she suspect something?"

"Maybe, it's really hard to say, Bastila."

"Maybe it would be better to tell her the truth, Master Dorak."

"No Bastila. We can't take the risk. If Revan even knew about her past. It's possible she would slip into her old ways. We can't have that either, not with how the war is going so badly for us."

He then motioned me over to his terminal. "Bastila, I want you to help me select a new personality and memory for Revan."

"Me Master? Why me?"

"Because of your affinity with Revan, you will know what personality and memory set will work and set well within her mind."

"I don't know if I like this, Master Dorak, we're talking about basically destroying another person, another life."

"Bastila….we have no choice."

"There is always a choice, Master Dorak. Always."

"Will we have a choice when Malak invades Coruscant and destroys the Republic?"

My shoulders slumped in defeat, what choice would the Jedi have when Malak destroyed everything that all of us held dear?

I slowly started to go over the profiles.

Hours passed, as I finally settled for a smuggler. A smuggler that had been deemed lost in the Mandalorian wars. Apparently, this woman named Phoenix Star had been smuggling weapons to various outer rim worlds during the Mandalorian wars to various settlers and planetary governments to help fend off the Mandalorians. The personality seemed closer to...well close enough to be like Revan's old personality and memory. If I was going to destroy who Revan was, I wanted the core of what Revan believed in to remain. It seemed that this Phoenix Star fancied herself a freedom fighter of a sort at least enough to smuggle weapons to those in need. It seemed like a good basis for a new identity.

I motioned over for Master Dorak, "This woman….Master Dorak. I think she would be a good fit for Revan."

Dorak nodded and read over the profile, "A smuggler? I don't know Bastila. They are often known for lawbreaking."

I furrowed up my brow,"And what do you suggest, Master? Not everyone is cut out to be a perfectly law abiding citizen of the Republic."

Dorak chuckled lightly, "Perhaps you are right, Bastila. Okay….so Phoenix Star it is."

"Master, do we actually know what happened to the real Phoenix Star?"

"I am afraid not, people like her live a rough life. She may have been killed during the war. She might be running from the law. I suspect the first though because her last transmissions in the profile indicate that she was calling a Republic scout ship for help near the outer rim and the Republic never found her or her ship. I will have to check further into this of course. But since we have picked out an adequate profile, I have to prep all the documents and the legal paperwork to have her actually exist in the Republic itself. I have a few friends in the Senate that can help me jump over the legalities of this."

"Master, I thought Master Vrook called dealing with senators like dealing with slimy Hutts"

Dorak laughed, "He's right. Politicians are a greasy sort of people but some of them are good and fair people as well. They owe me some favors and I think it's time I call in on some of them."

* * *

A few weeks later….

I sat by Revan, I held her hand, I was scared, I was here because I was going to help Master Jax lay the memories down. My presence was required to make sure Revan did not reject the memories we were going to place within her. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I couldn't get over the fact that this felt wrong. We were killing her, killing Revan. I sat a few hours before the Masters came and cried.

Master Healer Jula Jax sighed, "Bastila, you must trust the wisdom of the Masters."

"Master Jax, this feels like murder."

"What about the murder of our brothers and sisters, Bastila? Are their lives any less important?"

"Remember Talon, Remember Kara." Master Jax then went over to her station and then gave me a data pad, on it was the list of Jedi causalities from the war. I cringed. There were so many, so many Jedi dead.

"One life for a thousand and one life for a million, for a billion. Is the life or death of Revan worth it now, Bastila?"

I could not answer her but sadly in my heart, I knew she was right and yet, I could not help but hate and loathe myself for the choice I was making.


	4. Chapter 3: The Wind that Calls Our Names

**Chapter 3: The Wind that calls Our Names**

 **~Bastila~**

I stood in a field, on a strange outer rim world that seem so far removed from Dantooine. Yet it was apparent it was another farm world. It took me time to remember that I was not far away on a strange planet and I was still in the healer's chamber on Dantooine. My mind was clearly far away and in the landscape of Revan's mind. I could hear the wind blow eerily across the fields. It felt lonely and isolated. I saw no one and I wondered where Revan could be. She had to be somewhere? Her mind was damaged and….

Then I heard crying, sobbing. The sobbing of a young child echoing across the fields made far more eerie by how it was carried by the wind. I frowned, "Revan?"

I walked and paused listening to the crying and found it coming from the source of a hollow in a hill.

The hole seemed only small enough to admit a small child. I managed to squeeze my shoulders and my head in and found myself staring straight at a young child her chest bundled up to her knees, rocking back and forth and crying.

The child looked at me intently. I wondered, no it had to be Revan, or at least the psyche of the poor damaged woman's mind. I wanted to confirm it so I said, "Who are you?"

The child sniffed, "I….I don't know. I don't know who I am. Do you know who I am?"

I bit my lip, I had to guide this child out. Had to tell her what the council wanted me to tell her, and then weave the memories the council and the healer wanted me to put into her mind.

"Yes, you are Phoenix."

The child smiled, "Are you my Ashla'kai?"

I frowned, I had no idea what a Ashla'kai was. Yet, hadn't Revan come from some obscure outer rim world. So many different cultures, so many different beliefs in the universe.

"What's a Ashla'kai. Phoenix?"

The child looked thoughtful and then said, "Oh sorry, Not a word in Basic." She tried to think it over carefully, "I guess you would call it spirit guide. Are you my spirit guide?"

How to respond, my answers would be the basis for everything. I took a breath and answered. "Yes. I am your spirit guide. My name is Bastila."

The child slowly began to move towards the exit of the dark hole and I moved backwards so that Revan could move outward.

As soon as I was out the child came out and latched onto my legs and refused to let go of me.

"Somehow I knew you'd come. I heard you singing. "

I froze. She had heard me, Revan had heard me. All those times, that Jula Jax said Revan hadn't responded. Somewhere in her damaged mind, she had heard me. I hugged her. By the Force, I had made a difference to her. I had and at that moment it didn't matter what the council wanted me to do.

I held onto her for a long time when suddenly I heard, Jula in my mind

::You are doing well Bastila. Are you sure you haven't done this before?::

I felt angry, Jula was spying on me. Of course, she was, she wanted to know my progress, this was all part of the reprogramming progress.

I responded ::Now what?::

::You must merge the memories I give you into the child construct of Revan's mind.::

I slowly felt the Force swirl around me and the images came to me, fake memories, fake names, fake dates, fake family. All of it fake but essential to what we had to do.

The girl looked at me her eyes intent and she seemed to see the same images and memories that I did, "Are those my memories?"

I nodded, "You've been hurt Phoenix. I am here to guide you back to yourself."

"I know. Somehow I always knew that someone would come. You're here to help me."

So trusting, so innocent and I felt like Hutt slime. I had to remind myself of who this child was, what she represented over all. The child was Revan, or represented her damaged psyche. It did not change the fact that this was still The Dark Lord of the Sith, the one I had fought over two months ago. The one who radiated pure evil. This girl wasn't innocent. It was a lie. A LIE. I screamed it to myself. This girl was nasty, she was dirty, and she was evil.

The girl looked at me a frown on her face, "What's wrong? Don't you want to guide me. I've been waiting for you."

I cringed, she could feel me, no matter how hard I tried to hide my feelings, the girl seemed to sense my mood, my feelings. No matter how hard I tried to mute my internal feelings over this all.

I ruffled the girl's hair and tried to smile, "I am sorry, I will guide you, Phoenix, I will show you the way back to yourself."

I picked up the girl and cradled her in my arms and let the Force pour forward. I grabbed all the memories that Jula had given me and slowly merged them into the girl.

The girl squirmed suddenly restless in my arms and so I finally put her down. My work was done and she smiled at me, "Thank you Ashla'kai Bastila. I know who I am now."

She laughed lightly and then went skipping away across the fields, singing, singing a song. The same song my father had taught me.

Be still, my love  
I will return to you  
However far you feel from me  
You are not alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching you  
Speak to me.

I can't let go  
you're every part of me  
The space between is just a dream  
You will never be alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching

We are one breath apart, my love  
And I'll be holding it in 'til we're together  
Hear me call your name  
Just speak, speak to me, speak to me, speak

I feel you rushing all through me  
In these walls I still hear your heartbeat  
And nothing in this world can hold me back  
From breaking through to you…..

* * *

"You did a good job, Bastila." The assembled voices of all the Jedi council had said.

I nodded, then why did I feel like I had cut my heart out of my chest and stomped on it? My mind felt haunted by the image of a little girl. An innocent little girl, a girl that was evil. Sithspit, I was so conflicted. Should I go with what the Masters had told me, or follow what my heart was telling me?

I said softly, "What now Masters?"

Vrook spoke, "We are assigning you to a mission on the Endar Spire."

Master Dorak then spoke, "The Republic has need of you, quite urgently in fact, they wish you to help them lead an attack against the Sith."

I frowned, "But Phoenix Star? I can't leave her, she needs me."

"Do not worry, Bastila." Master Vandar stated calmly, "She will be assigned with you."

"Is that wise, Masters?"

Master Vandar continued, "She cannot stay here, Bastila, she will wake up with questions and you're the one that must provide them. She's under your charge and you must watch her. You must watch her carefully, there is a slight chance that her memories won't emerge at all. Even still, you must watch just to make sure the Dark Lord does not return."

I had a bad feeling about this, but I had been out of the Republic's fleet for over two months and no doubt the Republic had been badgering the council about sending me back to the fleet to aid them with my battle meditation. I could not ignore the call as much as I wanted to, I was a Jedi, and not just that, the only Jedi skilled in Battle Meditation.

I bowed and was getting ready to leave but something nagged my mind, "Master Dorak?"

"Yes Bastila."

"What's an Ashla'kai?"

Dorak paused in thought, "I haven't heard that term in a very long time. Why do you ask?"

"Something I heard regarding Revan."

"Ashla is a very, very old term for the Force. And an Ashla'kai would be a Force guardian."

I pondered it, yes, I was Revan's guardian. I didn't want to be, but it was clear. The Force had given me this task and as overwhelming as it all was. I had a bond with Revan, I couldn't ignore it either, the same as I couldn't ignore the missions the council gave to me. So it was obvious that Revan had to go with me. I would watch over her on the Endar Spire, I would make sure Phoenix Star turned out to be better than the Sith Lord Darth Revan. It was the will of the Force."

I had finally decided on my next course of action and my resolve was set. I attempted to throw away all the doubt, all the fears and all the anger from me that I had carried with me since helping to heal Revan. All these were paths to the Dark Side and I was a Jedi. I would serve the Force, and the Force fights with me.

 **AN: On to TARIS…..**


	5. Ch 4 Taris:Legend of Drunken Phoenix

AN: Okay viewpoint switch...

 **Chapter 4: Taris: The Legend of Drunken Phoenix**

 **~Phoenix~**

My eyes opened as I came crashing to the floor, son of a motherless hutt. What's going on? My head was spinning. Okay, so it probably wasn't the wisest idea to blow my enlistment bonus on large quantities of Juma Juice in a Courscanti cantina. Yet, that was how I always celebrate my good fortune, that and having a nice guy or gal on my arm. Well it had probably been awhile since I had a decent date with someone on my arm. All things considered, being a smuggler is a hard life and it doesn't exactly lend itself for many romantic endeavors.

I groaned a bit, still feeling hung over from my massive Juma binge. The doors to my quarters opened and I saw a Republic Ensign come rushing in. "We've been ambushed by a Sith battle fleet! The _Endar Spire_ _i_ s under attack! Hurry up – we don't have much time! "

"Wha?"

"Did you fall out of your bunk and hit your head? The E _ndar Spire_ is the ship we're stationed on – this ship! You probably don't even know who I am, do you?"

"Not exactly, Just too much Juma juice."

The Ensign shook his head; I could see from the look of disdain in his eyes that he probably thought I was worthless. Course, considering the massive headache I was feeling, he might be right.

I managed to wobble as I stood up, "So….ummm….yea, Endar Spire and….you?"

He gave an exasperated sigh, "I'm Trask Ulgo, ensign with the Republic Fleet. I'm your bunk mate here on the Endar Spire. We work opposite shifts; I guess that's why you haven't seen me before. Now hurry up, we have to find Bastila! We have to make sure she makes it off the ship alive! So grab your gear and let's get going."

"Slow down, mate, who the hell is Bastila and why should I care?"

I did care, really I did. It's just when you're nursing a hell of a headache, you're a bit more short tempered than you normally are. Damn Juma Juice. If I ever got out of this alive, I would swear off the stuff. Well…..maybe not long term, but at least for now.

"Bastila's the commanding officer on the Endar Spire. Well, not an officer, really. But she's the one in charge of this mission. One of our primary duties is to guarantee her survival in the event of enemy attack! You swore an oath just like everyone else on this mission. Now it's time to make good on that oath!

I rubbed my fingers through my hair, trying to clear the fog in my head. I swore an oath? I don't remember swearing an oath. Okay maybe I had. I must have been really buzzed on the Juma when that happened. Was that even legal? Oh hell with it, I had signed up, I did remember that. I also remember all my enlistment credits ended up in a damn bartender's hand. So yea, I guess I was stuck with fulfilling my oath. As I always say, never let it be said that Phoenix Star ever went back or broke her word. Yea, I might bend the terms, but broken, never! I was a woman of honor, spit in my hand and shake on it and it was good as galactic law.

Trask disrupted my train of thought scowling at my unkempt appearance. I bet that straight lace kid never drunk a bit of Juma the day he signed on or even knew how I felt.

"I know all about your reputation, how you used to smuggle spice and blasters along the Corellian Run. I guess the Republic figured since they couldn't catch you, they might as well hire you. And I'll admit, the Republic is in desperate need of someone with your kind of skills. Desperate enough to overlook your shady past. But now that you've signed on for this mission you're part of the Republic fleet. And Bastila needs all troops at her side during this attack! "

I grinned a bit, "Yep, that's me shady past. Anyway, let me grab my gear."

I managed to dig through my locker and found my clothes, they smelled overwhelmingly like Juma. They really needed to be cleaned, but no time for that. They were wrinkled and I must have looked a sight changing into them, all bleary eyed, wrinkled clothing. I dug out security spikes, a computer spike, a blaster, which by the way, I was a terrible shot. Yea, that's not normal for a smuggler, but what can I say, I am blind as a bat when it comes to accuracy on firing a blaster. I probably shouldn't tell Trask that. I also found a standard issued short sword. I tested the balance on the sword. Yep, felt good. I couldn't explain it but sword play felt like second nature to me. It was like I was born to wield a sword. I strapped the sword to my waist and then dug out a few simple med packs.

"Okay solider boy, let's get going."

Trask nodded and he opened the door, acrid smelling smoke assaulted my nostrils. Yep, this wasn't good. Not good at all. Smoke meant the environmental systems were failing. The ship shimmed as we went through the ship. Several soldiers shooting blasters at Sith soldiers. Some of the soldiers went down, I went through their packs and found a few grenades. Yea, those would be useful since, I stink at firing a blaster. I pulled the pins and flung them at the Sith soldiers. They went down.

Trask shook his head, "Have you ever been in close combat?"

"Are you kidding? I am a smuggler. I don't fight; I negotiate or head for the nearest escape pod. Fighting I reserve for soldiers like you. But, I've gotten out of a few close encounters every now and then. So yea, I have had to use a sword a few times."

"I guess that will have to do."

I grinned and then said sarcastically, "I am so glad you think so highly of me."

We went running through the hallways and he firing his blaster giving me cover as I went through sword play, my body moved with a grace that that came naturally, and the oddest thing happened, my hangover sort of burned away. It was like, the heat of combat just came upon me and my headache went away, my sluggish Juma impaired senses cleared up and I could think clearly to fight. I parried, I thrusted, I slashed and I felt like I was dancing on air as I cut down the Sith troops. An errant thought went through my mind; _they say the Echani can judge you by combat_. _It is the purest form of expression_. I frowned, where did that come from? I never learned sword play or combat from the Echani or even been in their system when I smuggled weapons. Trask's estimation of me seemed to have changed as he came over to me and said, "I may have misjudged you Ms…."

"Phoenix, Phoenix Star."

"You seem to have skill with a sword, Phoenix."

"Thanks."

I snarled a bit, I had a blaster burn on my arm and I grabbed a medkit and injected it. The burn suddenly cooled down.

Suddenly my comm system went off, "This is Carth Onasi – the Sith are threatening to overrun our position! We can't hold out long against their firepower! All hands to the bridge!"

I frowned, who the hell was Carth Onasi? Yep, I really should have gone to that crew orientation instead of blowing credits on drinks and pazaak. Oh well Phoenix, you can't cry over spilled Nerf milk. What's done is done; you didn't so if you look like a stupid gamorrean, it's your own stupid fault.

Apparently, Trask saw the confusion on my face and said, "Cath Onasi is one of the Republic's best pilots! He's seen more combat than the rest of the Endar Spire's crew put together. If he says things are bad, you better believe it. We have to get to the bridge to help defend Bastila!"

I nodded and we continued our journey through the hallways and corridors of the Endar Spire, taking down Sith along with the other soldiers who were fighting and dying along side of us.

Trask opened the door and my eyes went wide watching as a Jedi seemed entangled with a rather nasty Dark Jedi.

I wanted to help, but how? I was no Jedi. I might feel invincible in sword fighting, but I am sure as heck not going to tangle with a Dark Jedi and apparently Trask agreed with me as he stated "This fight is too much for us – we better stay back. All we'll do is get in the way."

All we could do was stand and watched and I stood watching mesmerized by the grace and the pose of the Jedi in combat. I coveted her gracefulness in movement, her poise, she seemed so calm despite the battle that was going around her. I watched her opponent, the exact opposite, heated, coiled like a spring, aggressive. I closed my eyes, I could feel it. It was….incredible. But the feeling was short lived. I heard a scream and the woman who had been so calmly fighting was taken out by a loud explosion. My eyes snapped back open.

Trask cursed, "Damn that was one of the Jedi with Bastila, and we could have used her help."

I nodded sadly; I went over solemnly toward the woman and carefully closed her eyes, so she did not have a haunted expression on her face. Her combat at least deserved proper respect. Trask frowned at my action, "What are you doing?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I just sort of felt sorry for her, all that combat, all the potential and she's dead." I found a few other things on her and picked them up and stored in my pack.

Trask shook his head, "You're one of the oddest recruits we've had in a long time, Ms. Phoenix."

"No one said I was normal, besides normal is boring." I said with an amused grin on my face.

As we went through the ship I began to wonder, how big was this damn ship anyway, huge, apparently. Trask then said, "Get ready to use that blade of yours. We're going to be going into some tight areas and sword combat would be the best way to combat any enemies we face."

"Umm considering the fact we ran into Dark Jedi, what good will swords be?"

"Your blade has a cortosis weave. It's strong enough to stand up against anything, even a lightsaber."

I suddenly got angry, "If I had known that, we could have helped that Jedi, maybe even have saved her life."

Trask frowned, "Calm yourself Ms. Phoenix; it wouldn't have done much good if we got our selves killed in the process."

I took a breath, "Fair point. I don't know what got into me. It's just that it was the Jedi that sort of convinced me to sign up here and...Well maybe I felt I owed them for..." I paused, "I had a run of bad luck with my smuggling runs and being recruited by the Jedi for this mission was well, as the Jedi would put it, Force sent."

Trask nodded. "Well a lot of us owe the Jedi for holding the Republic together, particularly Bastila." He opened the door to the bridge and it was completely abandoned, save the corpses of Sith and Republic soldiers.

Trask did a quick look over the bridge and then said, "Bastila's not on the bridge – they must have retreated to the escape pods! We better head that way too. The Sith want Bastila alive, but once she's off the ship there's nothing stopping them from blasting the _Endar Spire_ into galactic dust!

"Why do they want Bastila?"

Trask shook his head, "No time for that conversation, we've got to get out of here, if Bastila isn't here. We are doomed."

I scratched my head, "She's that important, huh?"

Trask nodded and we continued on our way.

We came to a door and found it was locked, Trask frowned, "There's two ways to the Escape pods, I don't know why this way is locked though. It's the quickest way to them."

He opened up the door and there in our path was a rather intimidating Dark Jedi. I shivered, I suddenly felt sick.

"Damn – another Dark Jedi! I'll try to hold him off; you get to the escape pods! Go!"

He held up his blade, "For the Republic….." He threw a grenade at the locking mechanism and sealed himself in.

I cringed. Trask had absolutely no chance against a Dark Jedi. He was as good as dead. I stood staring at that door for the longest wishing somehow I had a way to help him. Although that was worthless considering the fact, I'd probably get killed as well.

Suddenly my Comm buzzed to life, "This is Carth Onasi, and I'm tracking your position through the _Endar Spire's l_ ife support systems. Bastila's escape pod is away – you're the last surviving crew member of the _Endar Spire_! I can't wait for you much longer; you have to get to the escape pods!"

I nodded and walked through the ship, finding a dead solider with a stealth unit, I strapped it on my waist, and turned it on. I had no desire for anymore combat at the moment. Finally reaching the escape pods, I turned it off and scared the shit out of the man that was waiting at the pods.

"Sithspit, don't do that! I could have killed you thinking you were the Sith."

I glared as well as grinned at him, "Don't even think about it, soldier boy! Who are you anyway?"

He sighed, "There's only one active pod left, and we're going to need it. We're the last two crew members left on the _Endar Spire_. Bastila's escape pod's already gone, so there's no reason for us to stick around here and get shot by the Sith. Now come on – there'll be time for questions later!"

I rolled my eyes, "Okay, okay….fine….questions later then. I entered the pod and he entered in with me. It was pretty tight in that damn pod and I started hyperventilating.

He frowned, "You're not getting sick on me are you?"

I muttered, "I hate tight places, I've always had a fear of them."

"Just relax then, I won't let us die."

I rolled my eyes, gasping for air, "That's….that's not….helping me."

The escape pod jettisoned and I felt my throat constricting. I couldn't breathe, panic, sheer panic went through me. Enclosed space, I saw the Endar Spire explode I gasped for air and the solider put an arm around me, trying to help me get control of myself. "Breath…..come on solider breath, you're going to be alright."


	6. Ch5 Taris: The Soldier and the Smuggler

**Chapter 5: The Soldier and the Smuggler part 1**

 **~Carth~**

I frowned, as soon as Bastila and the Jedi arrived on the Endar Spire, they took over. This felt like Revan and the Mandalorian wars all over again. I didn't like it. The last time the Jedi took charge during a war. Revan and Malak fell to the Dark Side. I didn't have much choice over this. I just stood there as Bastila ordered this and that. She was young, and about as young as the Jedi I served with during the Mandalorian wars. Bastila stayed out of my way, I think she could tell I wasn't happy with this.

The Jedi were a necessary evil, at least as far as I was concerned. We needed Bastila. We needed Revan as well until well until he turned on us. The Republic couldn't afford any more fallen Jedi leaders. As much as we needed, Bastila for her battle meditation, she could also be considered a liability. However, I felt torn, she had proven that she was a loyal Jedi; after all she had killed Darth Revan. Yet, it was no secret that it was fallen Jedi that were part of the Sith and Revan had gone out of his way to recruit or even brake Jedi to his cause. Jedi for all their worth were still complicated individuals and like my old mentor Saul Karath they could turn on us.

I had mulled over Admiral Dodonna's last communiqué that she had sent me.

 _~ Carth, something is going on with the Jedi. According to Republic intelligence, the Jedi they have become more insular and secretive over the last couple of months. However, none of the intel that our spies have brought us can be verified, at least not at this moment in time. I don't like it. They are hiding something. I don't know what it is but be careful. They keep telling us to trust them, trust the Force and that they are planning something important to the war effort. Keep an eye on Bastila and any of the Jedi, staff or soldiers that come with her. She was gone from our fleet for a couple of months after the attack on Darth Revan. The time frame between the Jedi becoming more secretive and Bastila not being able to aid our fleets is too much of a concidence. Whatever this battle plan the Jedi are coming up with involves her. I don't know what it is as of yet but keep an eye peeled. If the Jedi betray us, it will undoubtedly come from within the order itself. ~_

I scratched my head; this was a dangerous game we were playing. Admiral Dodonna knew it as well. The Jedi had many loyal followers not just within their own order, but also in the senate, and various planetary leaders that lent financial support to the order. If we turned on the Jedi, like Malak and Revan had turned on the Republic. We would never save the Republic, as a betrayal from the proper Jedi order, plus fighting off the Sith, would shatter the foundations of our government for generations to come. So we were trapped, trapped in using the resources of the Jedi in our battle plans.

Bastila came up to me and handed me a crew manifest. I glanced at it briefly and noticed a few names of last minute additions. "Who are these people, Bastila?"

"They are individuals the Jedi Order recruited for the war effort, Carth. They are capable individuals and the Jedi felt their skills would help fill in gaps that are obviously found within the Republic Military."

"Conscription or mercenaries?"

"Both. But I assure you Carth that the Jedi have vouched for the character of all the people we have hired and drafted into the military."

I frowned, "That's very reassuring, Bastila, considering the fact that I don't know any of these people that you or your council are vouching for."

Bastila suddenly barked at me, "I am your superior officer, Carth Onasi! Accept these people or I will recommend that you come up under a disciplinary review."

I raised an eyebrow, Admiral Dodanna was right. The Jedi were planning something. "As you wish Bastila, but I assure you, I am going to do a very detailed background check on every one of these last minute additions to the crew."

"Is that really necessary, Carth? I tell you all these people's backgrounds have been properly cleared by the Jedi Order."

"Yes it is, necessary, Bastila. I don't care what you do to me, but I am going to find out who these people are and why they are here."

"Very well, it pains me to hear this from you, Carth. I was hoping that we could work together in a proper military relationship."

"Well I guess you were wrong. Look, Bastila, no offense but, I am not a part of the Jedi Order. I am a loyal officer to the Republic and my interests will always be for the Republic, not the Jedi Order. So bring up whatever disciplinary review you wish against me. The Republic Military Commission will clear my name and you will find yourself in a rather embarrassing position with your masters."

Bastila sighed, I had apparently had wedged her into a corner. She looked deep in thought and then said, "I'll tell you what I can do for you, Carth, I have the background checks from these last minute additions. I'll share their files with you. Would that be an acceptable compromise?"

It wasn't what I wanted, because records could be hidden, they could be altered and anything with The Jedi council's finger prints at this moment in time was suspect. Yet, at least it was an olive branch per say, I could always use the files Bastila gave me to go into deeper background checks. "Yes, Bastila, that will be an acceptable compromise, thank you."

"Give me a few hours, and I will have those records transferred to your personal data pad."

* * *

Bastila seemed distracted, more so than usual during this mission. Something was troubling her. She spent most of her time in her quarters meditating for hours on end. The rumor from some of the Jedi on the bridge was that she took the death of Darth Revan very hard. I was surprised to hear that, but then again Revan had been at one point in time an exemplar member of the Jedi Order. These Jedi saw each other as brothers and sisters. So losing one would be like losing a family member. So I guess I could understand why Bastila felt the way she did. Yet, she had done a great service to the Republic. The galaxy was better off without Revan.

The ship suddenly groaned and shuttered. I turned to a technician, "Report!"

"We've hit a mine, sir. We are slowly being pulled out of hyperspace."

The Sith loved mining the hyperspace routes they now controlled. If you didn't have the codes for the minefield or weren't given permission to travel through Sith controlled space you could end up a nice pile of debris. However, the Jedi were able to circumvent the minefields the Sith had set up by using the Force to detect the energy patterns of the mines and using the Force to let us drift by them harmlessly. So basically, the mines were useless to the Sith.

So why had we hit a mine? I looked at the Jedi on the bridge, "What happened?"

A Jedi Padawan, a young man who Bastila put in charge in her absence, stepped forward, "Carth Onasi, sir. I had assigned Padawan Katiyana Sarvan to scan the Force for mines."

"Where is she?"

"In her chambers, sir, she was meditating on the field."

I nodded, and left the bridge to find the Jedi responsible for our lives. Something felt wrong, I couldn't explain it. I sort of had a sense for these things and I was going to find out. I knocked on Katiyana's chambers. No answer. I knocked again. Again no answer. I quickly entered a security code and the doors quickly shifted open. The room was dark and a lone candle lay burning in the room.

"Katiyana?"

A blue lightsaber ignited in the room and the woman stepped forward toward me. I drew my blasters, "Don't come any closer."

I tapped an emergency code into my communicator and tried to stall for time.

"What have you done? And why?"

"I have let Lord Malak know your position; I just had to get you out of hyperspace. As for why..." She smiled, "A few months ago I was captured by the Sith. Revan showed me the truth, the truth of the Force. The Jedi are fools, fools to deny themselves the power of the Dark Side."

I shook my head, yet another twisted and broken Jedi, I sighed, "Yea, and they probably tortured you and broke your mind."

"Don't you dare call my conversion torture! Revan made me see the truth, the truth of my power. He let me go, told me to be a spy. A spy for the Sith, to pretend to be a Jedi, and it was so easy. So easy to fool you all. But now Revan is dead and I serve Malak, the true Lord of the Sith."

I felt a presence walk up behind me and a duel yellow lightsaber ignited, and Bastila stepped forward. "Katiyana was it worth betraying your brothers and sisters?"

"What do you think, Bastila?"

"I think following the path of Revan and Malak will destroy you, Katiyana. Please think this over, before you throw your life away in service of the Dark Side."

The ship rocked as blaster fire hit the Endar Spire and Katiyana attacked and Bastila threw herself into combat. Meanwhile alarms blared all over the ship. Katiyana laughed, "I don't have to win, and all I have to do is distract you."

Bastila yelled at me, "Carth, gather all hands to fight the Sith. I can't fight her and meditate."

"What about you?"

"Never mind me, just get all the hands you can to fight the sith. Now go!"

I ran back to the bridge as I heard Katiyana's and Bastila's lightsabers hissed and crackle against each other.

"Report!"

"We are near the planet of Taris, the Sith have disabled our shields and are in the process of boarding our ship."

I turned to the Jedi, "Bastila is in trouble. She can't practice her battle meditation. I need your help just as much as I need every man on this ship. Keep any and all Dark Jedi, and Sith battalions away from Bastila. It's all I ask. "

The Jedi nodded and scattered to different parts of the ship to fend off any invaders. The bridge crew slowly began to secure the bridge to prevent it from being invaded.

I watched in horror as the Sith disabled all our ship systems. The bridge doors opened and a very worn and tired looking Bastila slumped in. She looked visibly upset. A few Republic soldiers followed suit and came in with her.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, although I wish it had gone better for Katiyana."

She took a deep breath, and sat down in the middle of the bridge and I watched as she slowly began to meditate. Finally! The solders took positions around her as she meditated and then the doors opened and Sith came pouring in, trying to get to Bastila. I grabbed my blasters and began to fire. We had to protect Bastila, no matter what. In the end, all the solders protecting her, lay crumpled in a heap and the Sith with them.

It finally dawned on me that it was too late for battle meditation and I finally tapped Bastila on her shoulder, "Bastila, I am afraid it's too late. The ship is lost."

She nodded sadly, "I do believe you are right. Come on we must get to the Escape pods." We walked slowly away from the bridge and I hated to leave this ship to its destruction.

It was a bad omen for the Republic to lose yet again another ship. We really couldn't afford to lose any more ships during this war, and as painful as it was, this was yet another defeat for the Republic. As we entered the room for the escape pods, Bastila turned to face me, something she had obviously remembered, "There is only one thing I ask of you Carth. Please make sure you give every chance for everyone to get off this ship. I will try my best to meditate to keep what is left of this ship together."

"I promise Bastila. I won't leave till I know every person has boarded an escape pod."

"Thank you Carth, that means a lot to me."

I watched as Bastila got inside an escape pod and jettisoned away. I sighed and then said quietly, "May the Force be with you, Bastila." I watched from the window as Bastila's pod slowly floated away from the ship. I honestly hoped that she survived this; the survival of the Republic depended upon her.

I then sat down and waited, it felt like forever as I kept my promise to Bastila, as slowly from the hallways survivors came, and filled the room and used the escape pods. I waited till one pod remained.

I checked my comm device; there was only one lone heat source I could track from the life support systems coming down the hallways. I commed them and told them to hurry up.

Then the heat signature disappeared. I frowned, were they dead? Suddenly I saw the sparkle of a stealth field deactivating and I jumped a mile reaching for my blasters.

"Sithspit, don't do that! I could have killed you thinking you were the Sith."

The woman gave a cocky sort of grin or was it a glare? She then said, "Don't even think about it, soldier boy! Who are you anyway?"

I gave her a look over, she didn't look like much. She must have been one of those mercenaries Bastila had hired. Her clothes were wrinkled and they smelled like stale Juma juice.

Great I thought, of all the survivors in the universe, I had to get stuck with a roguish mercenary.

I told her our situation and that there was no time for questions. She took the news pretty well and crawled into the pod and then suddenly started to panic.

She seemed to be having anxiety issues and started to hyperventilate. I held onto her and told her to breath. Yet it didn't seem to be helping as we went hurtling backwards and forwards in the pod. Her anxiety seemed to grow worse and she ended up out of my arms and her head lashed forward and hit one of the control panels and then she went still.

The blood went dripping down the side of her head and I ripped a bit of my uniform and bound the wound up.

Who was this woman? And why did the Jedi hire her in the first place?


	7. Ch 6:Taris: The Soldier and Smuggler 2

**Chapter 6: The soldier and the Smuggler part 2**

 **~Carth~**

I watched as the woman I had dragged from the escape pod, to a Tarisian appartment, thrash around quite violently in a bed. I put a hand on her forehead, she was burning up with fever, and hot to the touch. I could have probably cooked a Dantooine flapjack on her forehead. I did all I could for her, I injected her with medpacks hoping beyond hope that the Kolto would break her fever. I couldn't afford to be alone, if she died from infection, I would be on my own trying to figure out how to find Bastila. I could do it, but...it would be harder and a much daunting prospect trying to find a lone Jedi on a Sith held planet.

On the fifth day, her fever finally broke and I was relieved. It gave me time to breathe and wait for her to wake up. Meanwhile, I went through my data pad. Bastila, true to her word, gave me the files on all the last minute additions to the Endar Spire crew. Most of the people on the list were basically support staff. The list included cooks, nurses, medics, droid technicians. It seemed pretty generic. Except, for the woman I now looked at on the bed, a lone smuggler. I raised an eyebrow. The only last minute addition that had any apparent military or combat skills was this woman. I muttered to myself, "That's not normal."

I dug through her pack, and found her Republic issued id and stared at the picture, I flipped it around in my hands and read the name out loud, "Phoenix Star….unusual name."

I heard a groan and I turned my eyes toward the bed.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Oh my head. I felt like it was spinning, this was much worse than the hangover I had with the Juma. A whole slew of images haunted my brain, a woman, a Jedi. She was on the bridge of a ship, slashing and fighting with her lightsaber against a dark Jedi.

 _Dark Jedi…. Endar Spire. Trask…._

I tried to move quickly and I couldn't move and I felt as weak as a kath hound pup.

I heard my name, "Phoenix Star…..unusual name."

I groaned and managed to respond, "Shortened my last name. It's short for Star Tramp."

The man groaned at my bad attempt at humor, "I don't think this is the right time for jokes."

"Sure it is. It's never a bad time for a joke, especially when I feel like crap. Makes things…." I coughed; my throat was dry and parched. I licked my lips, "Well it's better than the alternative. Although I really can't think of anything worse at the moment….but...you get the..." My head was killing me and I lifted my hand to my head trying to stop the throbbing, "idea."

I tried to move once again and I sunk back down in the bed and the man moved forward, "Take it easy, anyway it's good to see you up, instead of thrashing around in your sleep and burning up with fever. You must have been having one hell of a nightmare. I was wondering if you were ever going to wake up. I'm Carth, one of the Republic soldiers from the _Endar Spire_. I was with you on the escape pod, do you remember?"

"I had a dream….some sort of vision."

"I'm not surprised. You took a serious blow to the head plus that fever you had. You were probably having all kinds of strange dreams. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

"Carth…." I paused a moment, "Oh yea…." I furrowed my brow, "Where am I? What is this place?"

"Well, you've been slipping in and out of consciousness for a few days now, so I imagine you're pretty confused about things. Try not to worry. We're safe… at least for the moment. We're in an abandoned apartment on the planet of Taris. You were banged up pretty bad when our escape pod crashed, but luckily I wasn't seriously hurt. I was able to drag you away from our crash site in all the confusion, and I stumbled onto this abandoned apartment. By the time the Sith arrived on the scene we were long gone."

I coughed a bit, "Thanks Carth. I guess I was pretty messed up."

"It was nothing, I've never abandoned a crew member and I don't ever intend to start. Plus I had a promise I had to keep to Bastila about getting people off the Endar Spire safely."

"Bastila?"

"That smack to your head did more damage than I thought. Bastila's a Jedi. She was with the strike team that killed Darth Revan, Malak's Sith master. Bastila is the key to the whole Republic war effort. Anyway, The Sith found out she was on the _Endar Spire,_ and set an ambush for us in this system. I believe Bastila was on one of the escape pods that crashed down here on Taris. For the sake of the Republic war effort, we have to try and find her. "

I sighed and reach for a glass of water that was near the bed, I sipped it very slowly, contemplating on this. "Yea, why do the Sith want her so badly?"

"Bastila is no ordinary Jedi. She has a rare gift the Jedi call Battle Meditation. Bastila's power can influence entire armies. Through the Force Bastila can inspire her allies with confidence and make her enemies lose their will to fight. Often, that's all it takes to tip the balance in a battle. Of course, there are limits to what she can do. From what I understand of her ability, it requires great concentration and focus to maintain her Battle Meditation."

"Sounds pretty handy, but it sure didn't help us on the Endar Spire."

Carth sighed, "That's complicated. Remember I said it takes great concentration to do it. Well Bastila's concentration was distracted by a Dark Jedi. So she didn't really get a chance to use it too well on the Endar Spire."

I cringed, "Dark Jedi." I said that out loud because the vision of the woman fighting a dark Jedi was still pretty fresh in my mind, but apparently Carth thought I was asking another question.

"Yes, the Sith have all sorts of Dark Jedi in their ranks. A lot of them were former Jedi. Anyway, Taris is under Sith control. Their fleet is orbiting the planet, they've declared martial law and they've imposed a planet-wide quarantine. So we're going to have to be really careful around here. I've heard some grim stories about the Dark Jedi interrogation techniques. They say the Force can do terrible things to a mind. It can wipe away your memories and destroy your very identity! But I figure if we don't do anything stupid we should be okay. I mean, after all, they're… they're looking for Bastila, not a couple of grunts like us. But I've been in worse spots. I saw on your service records that you understand a remarkable number of alien languages. That's pretty rare in a raw recruit, but it should come in handy while we're stranded on a foreign world."

"Woah slow down, did I say I was going to help you?"

Carth looked at me incredulously, "I assumed that, well..."

I coughed a bit, "One I am still weak as a kath hound pup. Two, can't Bastila take care of herself?"

"Bastila's going to need our help. Many of Darth Malak's followers can use the dark side of the Force, and the Sith have already killed more than their share of Jedi in this war. I doubt anyone's specifically looking for us anymore: we're not that important. But if we're careful we can move about the planet without attracting notice; a luxury Bastila won't have. She's going to have half the Sith fleet looking for her. They know how important she is to the war effort"

"Yea, okay….I'll help but….I expect some sort of compensation. I didn't exactly sign on this mission for my health."

"Oh, I get it. Never mind that the Sith will destroy the Republic and ravage the galaxy. You're only in this for the credits. Don't worry. The Republic pays its mercenaries well. You help me find Bastila and they'll make it more than worth your while, I'm sure. Plus, it might be your only chance to get off Taris."

I threw up my hands exasperated, "Geeze Carth, way to make me feel guilty. Look, I'll be honest with you. I never signed up for this because I wanted to be on a Republic ship. No, I signed on because I lost my ship. The Hutts confiscated it and sold it for unpaid debts. It's a long story, but….I took too much...product….and felt guilty about those in need. I let my product go for a deep discount. Apparently, the Hutts don't give a damn about the war. Its pay your bills or your ship gets sold. I am lucky I didn't end up a slave or a damn bounty on some bounty hunter's list."

"And product would be….Spice?"

"Spice! Why do you Republic loyalists assume that it has to be Spice? Of course not Nerf-for-brains. I smuggled blasters, grenades, stims. Combat surplus. Anything that would be useful to any colony out on the rim. I did it during the Mandalorian wars and I was doing it for the Republic based colonies against the Sith. Yea, I did smuggle a little spice, but that was to cover basic expenses. But don't try and guilt me Republic. I know how important this war is. I hate the Sith as much as you do. Yet, I am broke. Can you blame me that I need credits? I am not heartless, Republic. I am not. I feel the pain and the agony in this war just as much as you do, but I never went under false pretenses that I was some sort of soldier or some sort of freedom fighter. I am a smuggler and I'll always be a smuggler. I don't have unlimited resources, unlike some organizations out there."

Carth's eyes went wide, "You were a gun runner!"

"Yea, and I was damn good at it too, that was till the Hutts took my ship."

"I may have judged you a bit harshly, it's just that..."

I snorted, "Preconceived ideas….about my chosen profession, yea I get it. Just don't try to guilt me again, Republic. I've done my bit for this war and the Mandalorian wars as well. So…. about Bastila….where do you think we should look?"

Carth nodded, "Well while you were ill I found out some intel about some Republic pods that crashed in the Under City."

"Then that's probably where we should look. I am not really feeling to good. I am about as weak as water, Repub….ummm….Carth. So I need to rest a bit then we'll get on it. Is that a deal?"

I spat in my hand and extended it out to Carth, he made a face and then took my hand and shook it. I grinned a bit, "That wasn't that bad now, was it? You've just made a deal with Phoenix Star, and I don't break my deals or my oaths. You've got a loyal ally till the end."

 **A/N: or does he? dum dum dum….. sorry couldn't resist.**


	8. Chapter 7: Taris: Reconnaissance part 1

**Chapter 7: Taris: Reconnaissance part 1**

 **~Carth~**

I had to admit I felt like I was in strange company with this gun runner and smuggler. She was a very unique woman. She was stubborn as a bantha and had an odd quirky type humor, calling herself a tramp when she first woke up. I didn't know what to make of her. I wanted to demand more answers about her history on the Endar Spire but how? I had ticked her off earlier about her desire on wanting credits. Republic she had called me. I had feeling that nickname was probably going to stick. Yet, I could see her point of view as she told me a bit about herself. She had obviously had fallen on hard times, like everyone else in the universe. She had apparently had latched onto a position with the Jedi to try and get herself out of her own personal rut. It was a shame that we ended up in an ambush and stranded on Taris. I still didn't trust her though; something about her being here was a little too convenient.

She smiled wanly at me as she proceeded to go through our gear and separated what she believed was usable and what was expendable, and could be parted with for credits.

She still looked a bit pale from being sick but was trying her best to get back on her feet. A knock on the door of the apartment brought her up quickly and she clumsily held onto a blaster. I frowned, "You know, Phoenix I really ought to teach you how to load and fire a blaster better."

She turned beet red and told me, "Mind your own business, Republic." She quickly put the blaster away and drew forth a vibroblade. She had found the blade in the apartment. It had been rusty, but she had managed to polish and sharpen it. She even managed to tinker with an old power cell and got it working with the vibroblade. She held the blade with a bit more of a confident stance. Yep, there was something odd about this woman, I had never seen a mercenary smuggler hold a blaster like a clumsy child and yet handle a blade like she had been a sword woman all her life.

She carefully went to the door and she motioned for me to follow. I took my blasters from my holster and she opened the door.

"This is a raid…." A combat droid stated authoritatively, "You will come out in the hallway sentient, no sudden movements or I am program to fire."

This wasn't going to end well. I held my blasters behind my back and Phoenix did the same with her blade, holding it quietly behind her.

There were aliens in the hallway and a Sith solider glaring at them. His other droid was doing the same thing, apparently knocking on doors and clearing others out. "Okay you alien scum, everybody get up against the wall, this is a raid!"

One of the aliens, a Duros suddenly protested, "There was a patrol here just yesterday, and they found nothing! Why do you Sith keep bothering us?""

Both Phoenix and I cringed as the Sith suddenly opened fire and killed the protesting alien on the spot. I saw a fire of anger in Phoenix's eyes and she gripped the handle of her blade, her knuckles turning white.

"That's how we Sith deal with smart-mouth aliens! Now the rest of you get up against the wall before I lose my temper again!"

Suddenly the solider turned and stared right at us, "Wait a minute…..Humans hiding out with aliens? They're Republic fugitives! Attack!"

Phoenix spent no time attacking and she attacked with a fury I never saw. Her blade hacked away at the solider till; he was nothing more than a corpse, with deep cuts across his chest and back. She still was cutting away at him, mutilating his body. She seemed lost in some sort of revelry that I had yet to figure out. The droids were taking careful aim at her and she seemed not even aware of them as I took my blasters and gunned them down.

Her chest was heaving and for a moment she looked like was going to attack me."Phoenix….are you….alright?"

She grunted lightly and said nothing to me. No jokes, no wisecracks. She was about to respond when the other Duros spoke up, "Poor Ixgil. He should never have talked back to that Sith. Thankfully you were here to step in and help us human. This isn't the first time the Sith have come in here to cause trouble for us, but hopefully it will be the last."

Phoenix snapped, "Stay out of my way….or I'll Ki…." Her shoulders suddenly slumped as if she was ashamed, "I am sorry….look I am just glad we could help."

The Duros then said, "Don't worry about the bodies. I will move them so it looks like they were killed elsewhere. That should throw the Sith off the track. With any luck, they won't be bothering us again for a while.

Phoenix merely nodded and watched as the Duros slowly went off dragging his friend's body away and Phoenix slumped to the floor, visibly shaken and I sat down next to her, "Are you sure you are alright?"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The raid was unexpected but even more, was the anger I felt pouring through me as I saw the Sith solider bullying the alien and then fire upon him. _Kill him._ Huh? It was a dark menacing voice that echoed through my mind. _He will attack you when he finds out who you are. It is either him or you, it is survival, Phoenix. Pure and simple. Make him pay for his animosity._ I couldn't argue with the rational, that cold unfeeling logic. The solider was going to probably attack us. He really ought to pay for it.

Sure enough, "Wait a minute…..Humans hiding out with aliens? They're Republic fugitives! Attack!"

A rage filled me, something inside me snapped and I went berserk on the guy. This wasn't the way combat should be. I knew that, I was getting distracted. That's one of those rules that goes against any combat sense, if you let the fight become personal, you get distracted then an opposing enemy lines you up in his sight and you're dead. Yet, I ignored that sense and for a moment it felt good. My enemy was dead on the cold duracrete floor. Carth came up to me and I nearly wanted to take a swipe at him, huh? Stop! Then the alien came up to me and I nearly bit his head off, yet I managed to get control of myself and apologized to him.

I took a deep breath and it took some time for the rage within me to clear and it terrified me. I slumped down on the floor. I heard Carth, sit down next to me, "Are you sure you are alright?"

I sighed, "I don't know what came over me, Carth. It's like…." I paused a moment, "I….mean I've killed before and I've been detached in combat before, but….I felt such….anger, hate. If I could, well I wanted to burn him up and turn him into ashes. Yet, I don't think that would have made me feel any better, in fact I feel kind of hollow over the whole thing. Plus …." I paused, "That was the most stupid move I ever did." I looked at the downed combat droids. I could see the blaster marks from Carth's blaster. "I could have been killed by those damn droids, if you hadn't been around."

Carth nodded, "I know the feeling, believe me! Its okay Phoenix, the Sith kind of cause that sort of reaction out of most everyone. Don't let it burden you down. You've got a good heart. From the moment you woke up, I could tell…." He paused, "you may be rough around the edges but….the fact you mentioned you smuggled to help people on the rim, tells me you do have a good heart."

I smiled wanly, "Thanks Carth, I sort of needed that kind of support." I sighed, "Let's see if there's anything useful left among this dead Sith."

Carth made a face and I said calmly "Yea, I know….grisly but….maybe there's some credits he had, or even a map of the planet."

I got up and proceeded to dig through his bandoleer and found some grenades, I picked up his blaster rifle, the same one he had used to kill that poor alien with. I grinned at Carth, "Seems like an upgrade from the blasters you're using." I took a look at the weapon and frowned, "Or maybe not. Geeze, Lord Malak and the Sith must be really cheap. They can't even give their soldiers a proper repeating blaster to protect themselves with. This is a really cheap model. We can sell this and use the credits as our 'Taris escape fund.'"

Carth chuckled, "Taris escape fund? That's a new one. Alright, Phoenix, tell you what, I am putting you in charge of all our gear since you apparently have experience with weapons and what's good and what's not and we really could use the credits."

I smiled, so finally Carth was trusting me, at least enough, to put me in charge of the gear. I could tell the way he was watching me. It was like he had some innate distrust about me. I didn't let it get to me because well, we were strangers. I didn't know him, he didn't know me. I decided give it a few days, he'd warm up to me eventually.

I dug through the man's pockets, "Bonus…." I grinned and dug out a data pad and looked it over, "Here's all the shift rotations for the Sith base as well as staff rotations. Looks like it shows when at least a couple of squads go on break, have their day off and even daily routine. That could be helpful if we have to break into the base, and rescue Bastila."

Carth nodded and then said, "Yea, but let's try not to go commando till we know more about Bastila's location. What we need to do is try to slice into the Sith's communication's grid. Then we can know without a doubt whether or not they have Bastila. I don't suppose you have any slicing skills."

I shook my head, "A little but nothing to brag about. I don't want to go poking into the Sith's communications because we could get caught and then they'll sent a squad after us. What we need to do is buy a droid specifically capable of slicing into their systems and not end up having it traced back to us. But..." I sighed, "Droids like that are expensive and…. I doubt we have the credits for it."

Carth nodded. "So it looks like we're going to have to get some credits, not just to escape Taris, but to live on, and for operational expenses."

So we were finally starting to talk about what to do to get Bastila back, and it felt good to put my mind to use on it. Suddenly I heard a man complain about our handy work on the Sith, "I just cleaned these floors."

I sighed, "I am sorry…really I am. It's just we really didn't have much of a choice."

He looked at us, saw our weapons and must have decided it wasn't worth getting into a fight over. He gave a sigh. "My name's Kadir. I'm the janitor for this building. You must be the new tenant here, right? I never thought they'd rent that abandoned apartment. Hmmm... You look like an off-worlder. What happened, you get stuck here because of the quarantine? Can't see any other reason someone would want to rent that old apartment."

This man probably knew enough about the area, maybe even where we could sell our surplus items.

Yet I had to be sure he wouldn't go talking to the Sith or make trouble for us first, "That's right Kadir, we're a couple of off-worlders, trying to avoid the Sith because our business isn't really that legit and all. So, the mess on the floor…."

He shook his head, "I don't want to hear about it. Got enough problems trying to stay out of the Sith's attention. I prefer to keep to myself mostly. I am sure you'll find others who aren't as quiet and unassuming as I am. But I'll help to clean up this mess and all but please don't talk about it anymore, If the Sith find out I know something." He cringed, "Most of us Tarisians don't like the Sith anyway."

Good to know….I mouthed to Carth. He nodded and then spoke, "What do you know about Taris?"

"Decent enough place to live, I guess. Except for the lower levels. That's where the swoop gangs hang out. Just stay in the Upper City and you'll be fine. You also might want to check on the cantina. I used to go there when I was younger. Good place to get a drink and find out what's going on in the Upper City."

My eyes lit up at the mention of the cantina, I hadn't had a drink in days and my throat was getting parched. Yet, I knew as anything else, that the Cantina was usually the hub of all things legal, illegal, and then some.

I grinned, "You know Carth, a drink doesn't sound too bad right about now."

He shook his head, "I think you've had enough to drink, Phoenix. Remember you reeked of Juma when I first met you."

I scrunched up my face in a pout, "You know what Carth, you're absolutely no fun at all. No wonder the girls don't hang around you all that much."

He snorted, "That's because I have to deal with hanging around you and you're enough trouble as it is."

I shook my head, "Really, you wound me, Carth. I am not that bad. Just different from all those straight laced types you normally hang around with."

I turned back to Kadir, "Anyway, where can we buy and sell stuff?"

Kadir paused, "Well there's Larrim, he's a twi'lek in this bulding that sells stuff. He usually has good merchandise. There's also Kebla Yurt's store. She's right across from the cantina, so you can stop in for a drink if you get thirsty while you're shopping."

I smiled, "Thanks for the info Kadir."

"I should get back to work anyway. I'll probably see you around – I'm here most of the time. This building doesn't clean itself, you know."

I nodded as the janitor took a bucket from his cart, and proceeded to go to a small room in the apartment complex, probably to get supplies to clean up our mess. I turned back to Carth, "In all seriousness, we really ought to check out the Cantina, It's usually the hub of all things important anyway. So let's split up. I'll go see if we can get credits for our surplus gear, and you can see if you can find out anything about Bastila or anything else about this planet. I'll meet up with you at the Cantina, and we can exchange what we've learned."

He nodded, "Sounds like a plan, Phoenix. Talk to you soon."


	9. Chapter 8: Taris: Reconnaissance part 2

**Chapter 8: Taris: Reconnaissance part 2**

 **~Phoenix~**

"You did what?" I looked incredulously at Carth in the Cantina, "I am not hearing this. So while I am out selling excess gear and I did nicely by the way. You signed me up to duel in the dueling ring and what in the Force possessed you to do that?"

"We've both said it, Phoenix, we need credits. If you were here, you'd probably sign up to do it anyway."

"Oh that's reassuring. I'd do it myself, huh? So you suddenly know me so well that you'd sign me up to get my ass handed to me. "

Although, Carth was right, I probably would have signed up to fight in the ring, but, it was the principle of the thing and he had done this without talking to me first.

"You're going in the ring under the name, The Mysterious Stranger."

I snorted, "The only mysterious thing that's going to happen is I am going to take you out and beat you….you...you hairless wookiee."

"Hairless wookiee? Alright, sister...just...calm down before your head explodes."

"We'll see who's head explodes, you gamorrean pig-man!"

"Is that your impression of an insult? Come on sister, take your best shot!"

"Ungrateful monkey-lizard!"

"Oh, ouch. I think you hurt my man-feelings with that one."

"Don't patronize me."

"Wouldn't think of it. Feel better?"

I crossed my arms together and snorted, "No, well maybe just a little. And why don't you fight in the dueling ring?"

Carth sighed, "I can't."

"And why the hell not!"

"Phoenix, I am a well known, recognized solider of the Republic, the Sith would spot me a mile away in the ring. You on the other hand…."

I sighed, "I get it, Republic, I am a nobody."

"Don't take it personally, Phoenix. But the Sith aren't likely to know who you are. That's also the reason why you're going under the name The Mysterious Stranger, rather than using your name Phoenix Star. Using your real name is too risky. The Sith might have come across a crew manifest back on the _Endar Spire_. "

I mulled this over, "I still don't like it. I could get killed in that ring."

Carth shook his head, "Nope, the duel ring has an energy suppressor to make sure nobody dies. Death matches are illegal. So it's perfect, you fight, win and make us some credits."

"You're so confident that I am going to win."

"Sure. I've been around enough recruits to see natural talent when I see it. You'll do fine. Besides, Deadeye Duncan is one of the worst fighters I've ever seen. If nothing else, you'll at least beat him."

"Okay….I'll do it. But I am probably going to have to spend some of our credits on some decent armor, and maybe a better blade. I saw some decent Echani armor and weaponry. Real light, should allow decent enough movement."

I unbuckled my credit pouch and sighed, we had about 500 credits. "Unfortunately…..I don't think I have enough credits to get all that but…." I grinned.

"Uh oh….Phoenix….what are you up to now?!"

I said nothing as I walked up to the bartender's bar, "Barkeep….one Tarisian Ale."

Carth scowled at me, I knew what he was thinking, and I knew he disapproved of my drinking, "Don't you scowl at me, Carth! I have got to get limbered up."

"Limbered up! Since when does a drink help you?"

"For pazaak. Don't worry Carth, I only plan on drinking the one drink. I have to be relaxed. It's a hard thing for someone like you to understand, but I can't play pazaak completely sober. The universe doesn't flow that way for me. It's a….smuggler's thing."

I paid for the drink and I took a sip, "Wow….." I coughed a bit, "This is a bit more potent than Juma juice."

"Just don't lose all our credits, Phoenix."

"Don't worry, Carth. I plan on playing to win. It might be a few hours, so don't wait up for me."

* * *

 **A few hours later….**

"Well Nikkos, it's been a pleasure."

I raked up the credits that I had won and put them into my pouch.

Nikkos stood glaring at me, I could tell I had pretty much worn out my welcome, "I do not lose at pazaak very often, but you have made a habit of beating me. I think it is obvious what that means – you cheat!"

I snorted, "Oh please…..where's your proof!"

"I haven't been able to figure out how, but I know you're cheating. I'm simply too good to lose this often. And I refuse to play pazaak with a cheater. "

"Don't be a sore loser, I've been playing pazaak for a long time, maybe longer than you."

"You can leave now, cheater. I won't be wasting any more time with you."

I raised my hands up, "Fine…."

"Goodbye, Cheater."

I shook my head and left the Cantina, but as I stepped outside Carth was waiting outside.

I gasped, "Geez Carth you scared me."

"It was getting late; I was getting worried about you."

I yawned, a bit, "Let's get home."

We walked down the streets and back to the apartment.

"How did you do, card shark?"

I grinned, "Oh I doubled our credits."

Carth shook his head, "I never understood the thrill of gambling. Either you are incredibly stupid or just incredibly lucky."

I laughed a bit, "I must admit that was the best game of cards I've played in a long time. It felt like….well like I knew what cards were going to come up for me."

"Gambler's intuition?"

"Yea, I guess, plus I was in my element, Carth. A nice soothing glass of Tarisian ale, the cards were drawn and I felt like I couldn't lose."

He patted my shoulder a bit and he said, "I am proud of you, Ms. Star. You've done a lot today to help retrieve Bastila. It's going to take some time, I get that, but I couldn't do it without you."

I sighed, as we reached the apartment and went inside, I promptly lay down on the bed, "Carth….I'd like to get to know some more about you."

"Me? I understand why you want to know more about me; I…I kinda get the feeling we'll be spending a lot of time together over the next while. So here it goes, I've been a star-pilot for the Republic for years. I've seen more than my share of wars… I fought in the Mandalorian Wars before all this started. But with all that, I've never experienced anything like the slaughter these Sith animals can unleash. Not even the Mandalorians were that senseless. My home world was one of the first planets to fall to Malak's fleet. The Sith bombed it into submission, and there wasn't a damn thing our Republic forces could do to stop them!

"You're talking like it's your fault. Like you failed somehow."

"It shouldn't be my fault. I did everything I could… I followed my orders and did my duty. That shouldn't mean I failed them! I didn't!"

I sat up on the bed, "I am sorry, Republic, that must have been painful for you."

"I'm just a soldier; I go where the fleet Admirals tell me to. I follow my orders and I do my duty. It just…doesn't seem right that doing that means I failed them! I didn't!"

"Why….." I paused a moment, "Why do you think you failed them? And who is them? Are they the people of your homeworld?"

Carth suddenly clamped up, "Yes…...ummm no. Look I really don't want to talk about it that much anymore."

"I am sorry I upset you."

"I know. Don't worry about it and I am not angry at you, it's just you probably mean well with your questions. I'm just not accustomed to talking about my past very much. At all, actually. I'm more used to taking action… keeping my mind focused on the business at hand. So…..let's get some sleep and we can work on getting back to the matter at hand tomorrow."

I yawned, "Good night Carth." Something was really bugging Carth and I was going to figure out what the heck was bothering him. I was worried that it might affect our mission.


	10. Chapter 9: Taris: Duels

**Chapter 9: Taris: Duels**

 **~Phoenix~**

"I am not going into the duel ring, Carth."

Carth's eyes furrowed and he then spoke, "Damn it, Phoenix why not?"

I folded up my arms, "We need to get some things settled between us and we need to get them settled now. You didn't fully answer my questions and I can't work with you until we get all these things settled."

Carth grumbled a bit, "Oh. Well, if it's an interrogation you wanted, why didn't you say so? "

"I never said that…."

"No, I was just joking, though you do seem to be full of questions."

I grinned, Excellent. Soon all your secrets will be mine! "

Carth shook his head, "All my secrets are purely of the mundane variety, unfortunately. Nothing worth extracting, though you're welcome to try."

I shook my head, "Just answer my damn questions, already"

"Pretty snappy with those orders….very well." He saluted me as if I was an admiral with the Republic fleet. "Go ahead….fire away, ma'm."

I was about to say something but then he interjected, "But since we are laying all our cards out on the table now. I've got some questions as well."

I folded up my arms, "Now hold on, Republic….I believe I asked fir…."

He held up his hand, "I've been going through the battle aboard the _Endar Spire_ over and over in my head since we crashed. Some things just don't add up for me. Maybe you could tell me what happened… from your perspective. "

I frowned, what exactly was he getting at, "Like you told me. Bastila ended up not able to use her Battle meditation."

"True. Bastila is as powerful as they say… she's the one who defeated Darth Revan, after all. Hmm. I guess that no Jedi ability, no matter how powerful, makes up for being completely surprised and outmatched. We didn't choose that battle, anyway. It got forced on us. Hell, I'm just surprised that any of us are alive to talk about it. Come to think of it, it's more than a little surprising that you happen to be here, isn't it? Just what is your position with the Republic fleet, anyway?"

I rolled my eyes, "Are you accusing me of something? I told you before I was a smuggler. I was recruited because of my background and my knowledge."

Carth furrowed his eyes and glared at me. I would have probably laughed, Yet I could tell he was dead serious.

"Isn't it odd, however, that a smuggler who was added to the crew at the last minute just happens to be alive? "

"What! Would you prefer I wasn't here at all."

"No. Don't be ridiculous. You've more than proved yourself since the crash… we wouldn't have made it this far without you. But still…

"Well, there were others that were added too..."

"Yes...but they didn't have the skills or the background you have, and it's odd that you were added to Bastila's party."

"What are you trying to say….are you hinting that I am some sort of spy or mole for the Sith and have something to do with the Endar Spire getting destroyed. Trust me, Carth. There are about a million other places in the galaxy I would prefer to be than here."

"I am just saying….it's odd that a person of your skills and background, just happened to be part of Bastila's party….AND happened to survive."

"Look Carth, you said it yourself. The Sith want Bastila. I am not a spy, I am not a mole….and I have nothing to do with what happened to the Endar Spire. I am just a Smuggler, a gun runner, and I wish I had never signed up with the Republic fleet if I knew the ship was going to blow up and I'd get stuck with such a paranoid guy like you, Republic. If you want to think that I am something more than I am….fine…..stay paranoid for all I care."

"I'm not trying to be paranoid. It's just that I learned a long time ago that something which looks like a coincidence probably isn't. Especially when the Jedi are involved. "

"And what do the Jedi have to do with this?"

The Jedi requested numerous things when they came aboard… hell, they practically took over the ship, as far as I could tell. Considering your connection to Bastila, and the Jedi… whether you know it or not… your presence here seems a little convenient. I'm probably wrong and this is probably nothing, I know. I learned a long time ago not to take things at face value, however. And I *hate* surprises.

"Surprises?"

"I mean I have to expect the unexpected. Just to be safe. "

I stared straight at his face, I felt like leaving him right then and there, but then where would I go? The Sith? Yea, right. I had killed one of their men the other day, so nope I was stuck with the paranoid Republic.

"I don't believe this. I am the one who was supposed to be asking the questions and….it turns out I am the one getting interrogated. Look Republic, I had nothing to do with the destruction of the ship. I signed on with the Jedi because I needed a job."

"I expect you're right. I've got no real reason to suspect you of anything. Still… it's better to be safe than sorry, right? "

"Coruscant to Carth….come in Carth…..are you there? We are on the same side, We're supposed to be looking for Bastila. If you want to grill Bastila about this when we find her, feel free because I am getting really sick of this. Oh, wait….." I paused, "How could I be so dumb! You can't, can you? Bastila's our commanding officer, you question her, you could get court marshaled or demoted in rank. So it's pick on me because I was hired on and have no rank. It's all beginning to make sense now."

"Look… I am working with you, I'd be a fool not to. But it has nothing to do with you, personally. I don't trust anyone, and I have my reasons. And, no, I'm not going to discuss them. So can we just keep our mind on more important things?"

I shook my head, "Geesh, Republic do you know what you sound like? You'll work with me but you don't trust me. I've never been so insulted in my entire life. I am going….do you hear me! I am going, because I feel like I want to pound someone into the ground. Since it can't be you, I'll go take it out on Deadeye Duncan instead."

Carth winced as I stormed out of the apartment.

I felt like I wanted to drown myself in tons of Tarisian ale and at the moment I crossed into the cantina. I headed up to the bar and then turned away disgusted. No, I had to keep my head and my wits about me. All I needed to do was get roaring drunk, get picked up by the Sith for drunk and disorderly conduct and Bastila could kiss her chances for rescue goodbye. I disgustedly walked away and bumped into a girl who barked at me. "Where did you get those clothes – a trash compactor in the Lower City? And where are those drinks we ordered?"

I wasn't in the mood for this and I said angrily, "Go space yourself….."

"How dare you speak to me like that! Daddy's going to hear about this!"

"Yea, whatever….."

The girl stormed away about as angrily as I felt. I found the dueling office and groaned as in the middle of the room was a Hutt. Wonderful, I thought. It's bad enough the Hutts took away my ship, I've got to grovel in front of them to set up a damn fight.

I went up to the Hutt, "Hey….I am here to set up a fight. My….." I paused, "My agent spoke to you earlier. I am the Mysterious Stranger."

The Hutt laughed and said in Huttesse, "Wonderful, you duel and make me rich. You get 10% of the purse for winning."

I glared, "I want more than just 10%"

The Hutt could see I was angry, "Save your anger for the arena, Stranger. I pay you more, then everyone wants more. No, you get the same as all the others – ten percent. That's my final offer."

I sighed, "Fine….set me up."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I felt like a two cred chip piece. Yet, I was so certain that there was something off about Phoenix. I couldn't explain it. My instincts were never wrong, if only I had listened to them when Saul Karath betrayed the Republic to the Sith. Everything about Phoenix screamed at me that there was something about her that was wrong. She feels wrong, and she acts wrong. What is it about her that makes me not want to trust her? Maybe that was paranoia kicking in but I trusted my instincts even over people. My instincts had always served me well in the Republic Fleet going up after Sith fighters and Sith squadrons. Perhaps this is why Admiral Dondonna had me attached to the Endar Spire, my instincts, as the Admiral could count on me to smell trouble a mile away. However, it seemed to me that these instincts weren't without a cost.

Phoenix yelled at me, "I am going….do you hear me! I am going, because I feel like I want to pound someone into the ground. Since it can't be you, I'll go take it out on Deadeye Duncan instead."

I sighed, I probably deserved that and I winced as Phoenix stormed out of the room. I cursed my instincts. Those instincts I had that so long ago the Jedi had told me as a young child was the Force. Yet, that was the only glimmer of the Force that I had, at least that's what the Jedi had said so many years ago when I grew up on Telos. I think it disappointed my parents. They wanted another Onasi Jedi in the family. There hadn't been one for at least fifty years. So all my family got with me was a Republic Fleet Pilot in the Republic Military Corps. I sighed as I slowly got up. I better make sure Phoenix didn't get into trouble. She had a habit of liking alcoholic spirits, that's all I needed on my hands was a drunk mercenary. So I quietly followed after her from the apartment. She went straight into the Cantina and sure enough, she walked up to the bar. I groaned this was all my fault, I had driven Phoenix to a drinking binge. However, I was pleasantly surprised when she moved away from the bar. However, her anger ticked off some Tarisian adolescent and I cringed, that could be trouble later on. I kept out of Phoenix's way as she went to the dueling office and set up a fight. She'd only yell at me and I really didn't feel like another round of Phoenix's wrath. The fight set, I took my datapad and held it up so Phoenix didn't see my face as she stormed out of the dueling office. I quietly pretended to read the Tarisian Times, a periodical which seemed more like Sith Propaganda than any real news of any importance. I snorted as I caught an article about how Lord Malak was going to reform the educational system on Taris. Oh please, that's all the galaxy needed was a bunch of angry Tarisian Sith kids.

 **~Oo0~**

 **A few hours later….**

I went and claimed my place as a promoter and Agent to the Mysterious Stranger. However, many of the other duelists' agents snickered at me. The agent for Deadeye Duncan, a short overweight man, named Loran laughed, "So you're the agent for the Mysterious Stranger. Take my word for it son; Deadeye will wipe the floor with her." I raised my eye at that, "And how many fights has Deadeye lost?"

"Fifty-four…but I remember when he was a top fighter in these matches."

I shook my head, "He should retire. You do realize he's the laughing stock of Taris or does Ajuur pay you to keep him in the ring?"

Loran glared at me, "Duncan still packs in crowds. I get my cut; this is a business after all."

I shook my head, "And I bet you tell Duncan that one of these days he'll win."

"Hey, it could happen."

"And Hutts will grow wings and fly."

Loran glared at me but was quiet when the announcer announced the match. I watched as Phoenix happened to glance at me briefly and then icily turned away.

Loran laughed, "It's too bad the name Ice is taken. Your Mysterious Stranger seems a bit cold tonight. I am sure you could probably heat her up later on this evening."

I glared at him, "Don't you dare talk about my fighter like that and if you do so again, you'll be minus a few teeth."

Loran laughed, "Oh I touched a nerve. Maybe we should be in the ring instead of our fighters."

I pulled out my blaster but kept it downward in a non-threatening manner as I could, "I could take you down if I wanted to, but I won't. You're just as broken down as Duncan. It wouldn't be worth the effort. Take your damn cut from the Hutt and leave me and the Stranger alone."

Loran nodded and was quiet. The fight commenced and I watched as Phoenix charged madly after Duncan….

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I was in the duel ring, I was angry and I probably acted rashly in the fact that I spent most of our savings on a really expensive piece of Echani armor and a fancy double bladed Echani ritual blade. I was sick of having to pick up the slack for Carth. I was the one making all the credits here and if he didn't appreciate me, he could space himself.

I looked around the spectator's circle from the duel ring taking in all the spectators, My eyes suddenly went to Carth. He was siting in a specialized seating area for promoters and agents. He looked at me and looked like he wanted to say something to me but I turned away and gave him the cold shoulder.

The announcer suddenly announced…..

 _You've seen him lose night after night after night. But this time, he's after fresh meat. In this corner, I give you Deadeye Duncan!_

 _And in the other corner, a relative newcomer to the Taris dueling scene. Emerging from the shadows with no history, no past and no name... the Mysterious Stranger!_

Wonderful I thought, talk about hyperbole.

The fight began and I went running with really no purpose or direction. Duncan fired his blaster at me and I ignored the pain that jolted through me. It felt like being stung by a swarm of fire gnats and I glared at Duncan imagining it was Carth and I swung at Duncan with my duel blade with a fury. I looked at Carth for a moment and he winced as I pummeled Duncan with blow after blow. That's right, Republic, I wish Duncan was you. Finally, Duncan groaned and collapsed in a heap.

I snorted and moved my sweaty hair out of my eyes as the announcer announced,

" _It's over folks…..Deadeye is down. The Mysterious Stranger has won. But really, are any of us surprised? Deadeye losing isn't news. You have to do better than that to impress us, Stranger!"_

I collected my measly winnings from the Hutt and proceeded to walk back to the apartment, maybe just maybe Carth would be ready to talk with me seeing how peeved off I was.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Boy, I sure was glad that I wasn't Deadeye Duncan. I watched as Phoenix gave impassioned swing after impassioned swing at the fighter. She acted like she was on stims. Maybe she was, although I doubted it. She was heated and energized because of our fight. I winced, although the fight was non-lethal, I could have sworn I saw blood dripping from Duncan's nose. The man dropped to the ground, clearly dazed and unquestionably punch drunk.

I got up from my seat after the fight and went to find Phoenix, I needed to head her off before she did anything crazier, maybe like pull the wings off of a few insects, because she stormed out of the ring apparently still mad at me. It was a good thing too because as she exited the cantina and I followed after her, there were apparently hired thugs waiting for her on the way back to the apartment.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I found my path blocked by two rodians and that annoying girl who demanded I get her drinks. Oh….yea she did say something about her father hearing about me treating her rudely.

I still wasn't in the mood for this and I proceeded to swing my duel blade at them and I heard my name being called.

"Phoenix….."

I looked briefly behind me as I saw Carth come upon the scene, "So now you come, Republic."

He took out his blasters and fired upon the Rodian thugs. They collapsed in heap and the woman went off crying, "Daddy…..."

I folded up my arms and he said calmly, "Phoenix, I am sorry. I am sorry about what I said. And…." He paused, "Remind me not to get on your bad side."

I glared at him, "I am still mad at you, Republic."

He sighed,"I knew you wouldn't understand where I was coming from. Let me try to explain. You've got the skills of an elite commando, and you've saved my butt more than once. Between that and your facility with languages, I'm lucky you're here. But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop watching you or being wary. I'm just not built that way. Period."

"Not built that way? That sounds like an excuse."

"Maybe so. But I've been betrayed before by people I… well, it won't happen again, that's all."

"What did I do to deserve to be treated like this?"

"You, uh… haven't done anything *yet*. But there's no guarantee that you won't do anything in the future. I've been betrayed before by people and I… well, it won't happen again."

I rolled my eyes, "But I have given you no sign that I am going to betray you!"

"I don't know that you'll betray me. But there are no guarantees… not for you, not for me. You don't have to take it personally."

"Really Republic, don't take it personally! How do you expect me to take it!"

I began to walk away yet again, I looked over the dead Rodian thugs and checked them over to see if there was anything I could use from them. I found some credits and some stims. Figures that hired thugs would have stims on them.

Carth followed behind me, really, was he like my kath hound or something. Geeze, couldn't he tell I was still upset?

"Stop following me, Republic!"

He paused and looked hurt, his eyes looked pained. Something bad must have really happened in his life that he felt like this about everything.

"I am not going to change, Phoenix."

"Yea….I can tell, and I am sick of your attitude."

"Yeah, well, you wouldn't be the first. Look… I don't expect you to be my friend. This is just the way I am, no need to take it personally. "

"Really, Republic, I am beginning to wonder if you're even capable of trusting anyone."

"Well, you can stop wondering. I'm not."

I walked back to the apartment and despite my telling Carth not to follow me. He did, well what did I expect, we both really didn't have any other place to go.

I began to look for the gear, When I found the bag, I opened it up and began separating my stuff from Carth's. I finally decided I could always live at the Cantina. I had done it in the past, I could do it again.

"Phoenix….. don't go."

I shook my head, "Has it ever occurred to you, that you could betray me!"

"Me?"

"Yes, you! Why should I trust you, after all? "

"You shouldn't. If you're smart, you won't trust anyone… not me, not Bastila, and especially not yourself. "

"Why not you? Accusing other people is a good cover for a traitor."

"I don't remember ever saying anything about "traitor". All I mean is that if you're smart, you won't trust anyone… not me, not Bastila and especially not yourself."

"That's heartless, Republic and pretty damn pithy."

"I don't need to be analyzed, thanks. Can we just get back to business? "

I looked up at him and shook my head negatively, "I wouldn't want to live like that. "

"Not all of us have the luxury of choice. I'm conditioned this way, sorry."

I packed up what little I had and proceeded to head for the exit," I don't need someone around who doesn't trust me."

"And I don't need all these questions. What I do need is to try and save the galaxy, if that's even possible."

"Well apparently saving the galaxy doesn't include me."

"Why is whether or not I trust you or anyone so damned important to you? Why… why do you even care? We don't have time for this, so can we please just… drop it. For now?"

"Goodbye Carth Onasi. If you ever decide to trust me or explain why you feel this way, I'll be at the cantina."


	11. Chapter 10: Taris: Reconciliation

**Chapter 10: Taris: Reconciliation**

I sat at a table and ate some of the free food that came with the drinks I had ordered. I had gained quite a bit of celebrity from the dueling ring. I had after all had beaten the whole gauntlet of contenders and there was absolutely no one else to fight. Of course, because I had won, a lot of the patrons actually bought me food or drink. I also had a nice pile of credits but I wasn't really happy. I had to continue the mission. I knew that I had to even if I did it on my own without Carth. I had sworn an oath to the Republic and I had sworn to Carth that I would help him find Bastila. Damn it, damn it, damn it, why did I have to have a conscious? A Mandalorian in full armor suddenly sat down next to me.

"Hey kid…..I've seen you in the ring and you've got my attention."

I frowned, "And you are?"

"Bendak Starkiller, I am a legend in the duel ring, course that was when they had death matches."

"Oh…." I paused; yea I think I remembered hearing the other duelists mentioning him.

"And what are you here for, Bendak? It can't possibly be for my health."

Bendak laughed, "I like you, you're like Ice, direct and right to the point. Anyway, you've got enough talent to make me consider coming out of retirement for one last death match – unless you're afraid to face me."

I heard a very familiar voice come up behind me and Bendak, "I don't think she's interested."

I scowled, "Carth….go away. I think it's my decision whether or not I want to face Bendak."

Carth sighed, "Are you sure you want to? Seems rather pointless to me. But it is your choice."

I turned to Bendak, "Let me deal with this spineless Hutt and I'll give you an answer, Bendak."

The Mandalorian nodded and then stated, "I'll be in the Pazaak parlor, just come and see me if you're interested."

I sat there and took a deep swig on my Tarisian ale. I pushed one of my cups over to Carth. "Drink with me, Republic."

He took a seat and refused to touch the cup, I glared at him, "Take a damn drink, Republic or leave. I don't trust people who don't drink with me."

He winced a bit, picked up the cup and took a swallow of it and then put the cup down, "I've been keeping tabs on you in the dueling ring. Impressive job."

I nodded, "I am sure you have more to say to me than my dueling."

He sighed, "The mission, Phoenix. You promised to help me with the mission."

"I know. I've been thinking about that as well. I was planning on doing it on my own without you to be truthful because I don't break my oaths or commitments. But I need to know if I can count on you. Plus we didn't finish…."

"Oh? You want to argue some more, is that it?"

"I am up for a good fight, as you notice."

"So I've seen. If I were Malak I'd be a bit nervous to have you on my tail."

"I want to know why you distrust me so much?"

"Why can't you just let it be?"

"Because of the mission, Carth, I can't….let this go. I need you to be committed to me as much as I need to be committed to you on the mission. And for the record, I don't want to argue with you."

"And I don't really want to argue with you, either. You seem… sincere enough, I guess. But I just don't trust easily, and for good reasons… which are my own.'

"Look Carth, I understand this may be hard for you but how can I work on rescuing Bastila with this….rancor in the room."

Carth ran his fingers through his hair, "Ahhh, damn it. I suppose I won't get any rest until I talk, will I? You want to know why I don't trust anyone? Fine, here goes. Five years ago the Jedi had just finished the war with the Mandalorians. Revan and Malak were heroes. I was damn proud to have served in their fleet. It was completely unexpected when they turned on us, invading the Republic while we were still weak. Nobody knew what to think, least of all me. Our heroes had become brutal, conquering Sith… and we were all but helpless before them. Think about it… if you can't even trust the best of the Jedi, who can you trust?"

"What do I have to do with Malak and Revan?"

"It… it's not that. It's… That's not what I mean. There were… there were others. Good, solid, trusted men who joined them."

"They turned to the Dark side, obviously, but why is this such a personal issue with you?"

"Yea, the Jedi turned to the Dark side, but there were good solid trusted men that weren't Jedi that joined with them. Malak and Revan and the Sith deserve to die for what they've done… but the ones who fled the Republic and joined them are even worse. The dark side has nothing to do with why they joined the Sith. They deserve no mercy!"

"I haven't joined the Sith, Carth. I was running blasters to Republic held space and Republic held colonies, in case you've forgotten."

"I know. I… should apologize to you. I've become so accustomed to expecting the worst in others, and you've done nothing to deserve that. Anyway….come back to the apartment with me and let's get back on the mission. Besides you…..sort of need a rinse in a refresher, you smell like stale Tarisian ale, sweat, and food."

I glared, "So now you insult me about not taking a bath."

Carth laughed, "At least I am being honest, so can you forgive me?"

I laughed a little, "Yea, I forgive you, Republic. Although I suspect that there is more to your story and I want to hear it, but I'll cut you some slack….for the moment."

We proceeded to walk out and I stopped by Bendak, "I have made up my mind, Bendak, I am not going to fight you, at least not….now."

"You're a coward, Mysterious Stranger."

I laughed, "Yea, well….I am happy keeping my life at the moment, so if that makes me a coward, so be it. But I'll let you know if I change my mind."


	12. Chapter 11: Taris: Roadblock

**Chapter 11: Taris: Roadblock**

 **~Carth~**

I was grateful I had Phoenix back on the mission. She was a capable woman and had an obvious command of skills for a smuggler. Although, even though we had basically made up, I still felt something was wrong about her. I just couldn't help it or put my finger on it. Yet, Phoenix didn't seem to be lying and was quite adamant to the point of leaving me and living in the cantina for over a week and a half. I really needed to get my act together and sadly, Phoenix was right. My lack of trust was compromising our mission to find and rescue Bastila.

We spent the next few days scouting the north end of the Upper City. We had to get into the lower city to get into the under city but every time Phoenix tried to pull the whole I -live-in-the- lower-city ploy, the Sith guard would ask for her papers and when she couldn't produce them, the Sith told her to leave. She shook her head at me, as we sat down on a bench and ate lunch, "No luck, Republic. I can't get in."

I looked glumly at her, "We have to get in….somehow."

"Yea, just once I wish I was a Jedi." and she grinned while she wiggled her fingers around imitating the way a Jedi called upon the Force, "You will let me into the lower city."

I smiled lightly at Phoenix's trying to imitate the actions of a Jedi, "Well as helpful as that would be at this moment in time, you're not and frankly being a Jedi right now isn't such a great idea. The Sith would be all over you."

She nodded and looked contemplative, "So no Jedi powers. But let's contemplate what we can do."

"Well, Phoenix….." I started bouncing ideas off her head, "If I was a Sith, what would convince me to let you into the lower city? Try and think what an authoritative power hungry organization respects and what their soldiers and troops respect."

Phoenix looked thoughtful, "Power, of course. Absolute authority, of course. Bellow at them and they bellow back. Act like..." She paused, "Republic, of course….we've got to act like Sith. Well not the nasty, Dark side bit….but act like them, look like them. If I were to go up to you dressed up like a Sith and yelled and put up a fuss demanding to be let into the lower city….would you let me in?"

"I don't know, Phoenix. I might, or I might demand papers but then if you acted like you're in charge or in a position of authority, then, I might decide that it's not worth bothering you about papers. However, there's a problem, how are we going to get uniforms to be Sith?"

She shrugged, "Now that seems to be the million credit question of the year, Republic. Yet…." She furrowed her brow, "A lot of the Sith soldiers were buying me food and drinks at the cantina because I am dueling champ. I suppose I could chummy myself up to them and capitalize on my celebrity. So maybe me getting mad at you had a good after affect after all."

I shook my head, "Phoenix, I am sorry about that….it's just that."

"Water under the bridge, Republic. Yet you could tell me why….you have such trust issues and the whole thing you said about good men following Dark side Jedi, specifically Revan and Malak."

I felt annoyed, damn it, wouldn't this woman drop it? "I thought I said I didn't want to talk about it anymore."

"Yea, but I also said I would ask you, so no I don't plan on dropping it. Besides if you don't get it off your chest now….I'll keep badgering you till you do. Plus I am bored….so spit it out."

"Cute. Nice to know that you're so full of concern. "I sighed, "Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt, though I don't know why you're so interested."

"You owe me, Republic."

"I… suppose you're right. Fine, then. But I don't know why you're so interested, but here it goes. When I think of all the men who have betrayed us, the one that stands out above them all is the one I respected the most. Saul. "

Phoenix looked like she was trying to figure out, who Saul was. She then said, "That name sounds familiar."

"With good reason, Admiral Saul Karath is the commander of the entire Sith fleet. He's half the reason Malak has done so well in the war. Saul was my commanding officer back when the Mandalorian Wars first began. He taught me everything about being a soldier… and I looked up to him. Saul approached me before he left. He talked to me about how the Republic was on the losing side… and about how I should start thinking of my survival. I know now that he was trying to recruit me into the Sith, but I couldn't have conceived of it back then. I argued with him and he got angry and he left. I never saw him again."

"Geeze, Republic how could you not have seen that….or were you simply blinded by loyalty?"

I cringed, "Probably loyalty, Phoenix. I admit I didn't want to. I thought the universe of Saul; he was my mentor after all. Would you have seen it?"

"I don't know, Republic….but I try not to make myself such a gullible mark."

"And how do you do that, Phoenix?"

"I...I don't...well I am smuggler, you spend your life trying to read people. You have to, if you don't you're dead."

"Saul was my mentor… he led us to so many victories against the Mandalorians, even when things looked to be at their worst. I just… I couldn't conceive of it. He… he couldn't be serious. I was wrong, of course… he not only left us for the Sith, he… he gave them the codes to bypass our scanners. I remember waking up as the first of the Sith bombers snuck past our defenses and began destroying half of our docked ships. I knew right away what had happened. I… could have stopped him. I could have stopped it all."

"I get it, you feel guilty and are kicking yourself for letting someone get close to you in such a way and they turned on your trust."

"I blame Saul, not myself. I was… I was stupid and I ignored the danger. He nearly destroyed us all."

"Really?"

"I don't know. Maybe. He might have killed me if I'd tried, or I might have killed him. I was stupid, however, and I let him go."

"You know what, Republic. I don't think you're stupid. I think you simply let your loyalty to a good man blind you. And that's okay, it does happen. Sentients are probably the most, mixed up conflicted people in the universe. People will hurt you, It happens. But the point is not to make it make you bitter."

"Well there's more….but I don't want to talk about it."

"Alright Republic. I get it...you've bled enough of your soul. So let's get back on how I am going to get those uniforms."

 **~Phoenix~**

Think flirtatious…..think flirtatious. Think femme fatal. Although seriously I hated that holovid stereotype, it was way too obnoxious and annoying. Yet, here I was getting hot and heavy with a Sith soldier off duty. I could see Carth in a corner and he was fuming. Geeze, Republic, I didn't realize you thought of me that way. Oh well, your loss if you're too stupid not to say anything. Not that I don't mind the attention, because I always like having a guy on my arm.

The Sith solider pulled me close into him and he suddenly kissed me. His breath tasted like, he was drunk. Yep, that's what happens when you drink way too much Tarisian ale.

I giggled like a bubble head, damn I hated that, but I could tell some of these Sith thought of women in a subservient way. I was the damn dueling champ, and yet he wanted a demure passive woman. I curled my fingers around his hair and whispered in his ear, "I think it's time we go somewhere private, Yun."

The solider nodded, and I grabbed a bottle of Tarisian ale. From the corner of my eye as Yun and I walked to his apartment, I saw Carth. I could tell he was fuming by his angry footfalls. Making it to his apartment and going inside, Carth's foot stuck in the door and I grabbed Yun and kissed him so he didn't notice Carth. The next thing that happened was Carth hitting the man over the head with the butt end of his blaster. Yun collapsed in a heap.

I scowled, "Geeze Republic, are you jealous?"

"What kind of woman are you?"

"A smuggler, Republic. I did say I was a Star Tramp."

Carth snorted, "Don't degrade yourself that way, Phoenix. I know very well as you do, that you're not like that."

"You don't know me at all, Republic! I have a past too, you know. But it's nice to see you care. Anyway stop trying to consider my virtue, and grab Yun's armor."

Carth grunted and started to search around for the armor. He found the heavy backpack that held the armor, he threw it on his back and we trudged out the door.

"And stop fretting, Republic, he's not my type."

"And what is your type? Or dare I ask?"

"Someone who treats me like an equal and not like an object. I have yet to find anyone like that."

Carth hoisted the heavy armor as it was starting to slide off his back and said nothing more. We walked down the streets trying to get back to our hideout when three men blocked our path, "What is thish planet coming to, huh? Shlummies walkin' around the Upper City! "

"Shouldn't you go back to the Lower Cities where you belong, shlummie?"

Carth rolled his eyes, "This is rich….being picked on by the drunks."

I grinned a bit, "Hey buddies, no fuss….let me buy you a drink."

"No way! Forget it! No more drinksh! We're late enough as it is."

"Uh… yeah. I guess you're right. Maybe next time, shlummie. Come on fellas, let's go."

Carth looked at me, "Good thinking, Phoenix. Man, those drunks stink."

I laughed, "I hope you didn't think that when you first met me."

"Of course not..."

I raised my eyebrows, "Sounds like you're feeding me a line, Republic….but anyway let's get back to our digs."

We had done it, we had gotten our ticket to the lower city and soon we would be able to get closer to Bastila. I breathed a sigh of relief as we entered our apartment.

Carth opened the pack as we got inside and looked over the shining armor and I grinned, "Pure Pazaak, Republic….pure pazaak!"


	13. Chapter 12: Taris: Lower City

**Chapter 12: Taris: Lower City**

 **~Phoenix~**

The armor didn't seem to fit me so it was up to Carth to wear the armor. I looked at the uniform that went with it. It seemed a bit big for Carth so I took out a standard issue repair and maintenance kit and proceeded to alter the uniform to fit Carth.

Carth watched as I took measurements across his arms, his chest, and his legs and proceeded to alter the uniform. I sat down on the bed and began to sew and mend.

"Phoenix…."

"Hmm…."

"Where did you learn how to tailor clothing?"

"Well you have to learn things when you're on your own and have to rely on your own means and skills."

Carth nodded and then said, "Phoenix, do you have a husband? Wife? Boyfriend? Girlfriend?

"Geeze Republic, why all the personal questions?"

"Well I've told you about me…..and..."

"Oh I see…I suppose fair is fair. No I don't have a husband or a boyfriend or a girlfriend if you must know. Never had the time for one."

"Mother, father, siblings…."

"Dead, dead, and dead, Republic."

"What…..happened to them?"

I took a long sigh, "I suppose it's only fair that since you bore your soul, I should bare mine. My family and I are from Deralia in the outer rim. I was born there actually. My father and my family were farmer merchants. We grew a special Derallian grape which my father made into wine. We had hopes to expand our product into the mid-rim. He knew I had a skill for bargaining and selling so it was left to me to take my...err our ship and gain new customers, new trading agreements. My father had dreams of being rich and a newly establish colony in the outer rim is the stuff of dreams to a family that felt crushed by the established worlds. So….." I paused a moment. "I had taken the family ship to trade, sell, and bargain in the mid-rim. I…."

I began to tear up and tears came down my face as I started to choke up, "I came home and my home was in flames. My family home was in rubble and my parents and sibling were dead. The Mandalorians had invaded our world and left nothing of my family homestead. They took what they wanted, raided our winery, and my father, mother, my brother….. all dead. They were killed. I saw their bodies in the rubble. I felt so empty, Republic. I had a ship full of credits and trade items and no future. I vowed…..well I vowed that I wouldn't let what happened to my family happen to others. I wasn't a soldier, Republic. I was a merchant, so….it wasn't that difficult to become a smuggler. I had my family's ship and some resources from selling wine. It was a nice start to buy weapons and sell them for a profit. So I became a gun runner, I smuggled blasters and weapons to any of the outer rim colonies that needed them. It became my reason for living. Even this war with the Sith, I was still doing this to honor my family and their memory. ''

Carth nodded, "Pretty grim, Phoenix. Pretty damn grim. But I feel your pain."

I finished working on the uniform top and I handed it to Carth to put on, "I don't want your pity, Republic, because you know as well as I do, this war made me into something I didn't want to be."

Carth sat down on the bed. "You're just as lonely and broken as I am."

"What if I am, Republic? Who am I going to go cry or weep to?"

He squeezed my shoulder, "Is that why you joke and make light of everything, Phoenix?"

I smiled lightly, "What do you think, Republic?"

"I think you're a girl that has had to grow up a lot sooner than you had to, Phoenix."

"That maybe, but I am who I am, Carth."

I quietly continued to work on the pants and took adjustments on them and I began to hum and sing a song.

Be still, my love  
I will return to you  
However far you feel from me  
You are not alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching you  
Speak to me.

I can't let go  
you're every part of me  
The space between is just a dream  
You will never be alone

I will always be waiting  
And I'll always be watching

We are one breath apart, my love  
And I'll be holding it in 'til we're together  
Hear me call your name  
Just speak, speak to me, speak to me, speak

I feel you rushing all through me  
In these walls I still hear your heartbeat  
And nothing in this world can hold me back  
From breaking through to you…..

"Pretty song, Phoenix."

"Thanks, my father taught it to me. I have fond memories of my father. Not so much of my mother, but we….reconciled before….well before she was killed. She taught me how to mend and fix clothing. She was very thrifty. We had enough credits to live very nicely but she acted like every day we could be broke. So our fights were always over credits and whether I should or shouldn't spend them."

I finally finished the pants and Carth finally changed into the uniform that went with the armor, "What do you think, Phoenix?"

"I think you make a very dashing Sith, Republic."

Carth laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"You used Sith and Republic in the same sentence as if they belong together."

I suddenly laughed, "Republic! You finally cracked a joke. It's about time!"

 **0~o~0**

Carth had my arms bound in binders and he walked down the streets of Taris, in full Sith armor. I had my head bowed down low. We had decided that it would look real if I was a prisoner and Carth was going to escort me to the lower city. His explanation was that I was part alien and that I belonged in the lower city.

Carth stood by the elevator to the lower city and told the Sith, "I found this sleaze half breed alien in the upper city limits. I am taking her back where she belongs."

The Sith soldier nodded, "I knew there was something off about this woman. I didn't know she was a disgusting half breed. Very well, soldier, take her down and be sure to teach her a lesson. Aliens and humans don't mix."

I snorted, "Don't you insult my parents, scum!"

Carth cuffed me, "Quiet, you….."He pushed me into the elevator and he followed. The doors closed and I mouth to Carth. 'It worked….' The doors opened to a hail of blaster fire, what the frack!


	14. Chapter 13: Taris: Shots in the Streets

**Chapter 13: Taris: Shots in the Streets**

 **~Carth~**

The elevator to the lower city whirled down the shaft. I smiled through the Sith armor. Phoenix was right our plan to get to the lower city had worked. The elevator then stopped and as the doors opened. We were assaulted with blaster fire. I grabbed my blasters and started firing at whoever was firing at us but it felt like I was firing blind.

Meanwhile, Phoenix was cursing at me, "Damn it, Republic, I am a fat sitting Hutt here." She held up her binder held hands. I pushed her to a wall and shielded her with my body as I quickly undid the binders. I handed her one of my blasters and she scowled. I knew she was bad firing blasters and she needed a melee weapon. We had left all her weapons back at our hide out to make our decent to the lower city more realistic, but that was turning out to be a big mistake. She shot a few rounds, one of her shots was a lucky shot and ended up hitting what looked to be a swoop gang member and he went down, the other two shots hit the wall. She scowled again and then handed me back my blaster. "Who are we fooling, Republic. Blasters are not my thing."

She crouched in a fighting style that I clearly recognized as Echani. Where in the universe did a smuggler from an outer rim world learn the Echani martial arts? The Echani fighting styles were taught to many a solider during the Mandalorian wars, particularly to Republic Soldiers under Revan's command. Revan had insisted that all his solders learn how to fight unarmed in case they were disarmed. The fallen Jedi had insisted that death was preferable to capture by the Mandalorians and that all his soldiers should fight unarmed even if the fight lead to a soldier's death. Even I had learned some of the Echani martial arts, as Saul had insisted that battle might come in many forms including fighting unarmed.

Somewhere during her travels, apparently Phoenix had learned how to fight unarmed with her hands in the Echani way. I offered as much cover to Phoenix as I could as she took on her opponents with her hands and with her feet. There were still quite a few Swoop gang members firing at us and I was slowly becoming over run. Blaster fire hit me repeatedly into my armor. I gritted my teeth in pain and….

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Apparently we had stepped into a gang war and the swoop gang members didn't care that they were firing on innocents as well as each others. Damn it all, this was nuts. Carth offered me his blasters once he freed me from the binders but my shots were haphazard and only managed to send one gang member down. We were in trouble, we were being overwhelmed and my heart raced.

 _Relax._

Not again, it was that same dark cold voice I heard once before in combat.

I scowled, how in the damn frack can I relax?

 _Phoenix, relax and bend your body and your arms. Breathe, let your hands, feet, and arms relax. Remember, combat is the purest form of expression. Let your body express itself and you will win._

This damn voice had encouraged me to anger last time, but this time I was being encouraged to relax and let my body flow naturally. What kind of disjointed nightmare was this?

I breathed and did what the voice said to do; I relaxed and let my body feel relaxed. My arms extended and I let whatever I felt flow into my limbs. I reacted to the combat around me, it felt like the world had slowed down and I attacked. My feet hit into swoop gang members and my hands slammed hard into their bodies taking them down slowly one by one. I was aware of the pain they inflicted to my body, but to accept that pain would lead to my death and death was unacceptable. I had to survive, for Bastila's sake. So the last swoop gang member fell beneath my hands and I breathed out heavily. Blood from melee weapon cuts pooled around me on my hands, legs, and feet. My back burned with blaster burns.

"Hey….Republic..." I grinned, "We made it." I felt terribly weak, but I was still alive. No response from Carth.

"Republic?" No answer. I was getting worried, "Carth….damn it answer me!"

I looked around and found Carth in the Sith Armor face down, "Damn it, Republic you can't die on me."

I fumbled around Carth's pack and found a few med packs. I needed a couple as well, and I injected a couple of packs into me and the rest I pumped into Carth. I removed the face plate from Carth's face and he looked pale. Damn it all, he needed a doctor, a medic, a healer, anybody that had any sort of medical training. Yet, here in the lower city where could I go? In fact, where on Taris could I go? If the Sith found him or me, we would be in serious trouble. I saw a Cantina. My eyes lit up, maybe. I don't know long shots were long shots. I dragged Carth along. Damn, Republic, I thought, you need to lose some weight.

The bouncer saw me and said firmly, "No Sith...on duty allowed!"

I fumed, "Does it look like he's on duty? You….you... Schutta!"

The bouncer seemed to take my insult without a degree of anger. "Regardless the Sith commanders won't let any Sith on duty come in."

I glared at him in anger, "Fine….if he dies then I am going to dice you up, make no mistake on that."

I slowly, dragged Carth to what looked like apartments in the lower city. Who the frack lives here? This whole damn lower city is a dump. I opened up the doors to the entrance and pulled Carth in. I managed to drag Carth to the doors of an apartment and sliced the doors open. Inside was a woman, she looked quite surly. "Stop right there, or I'll give you a blaster bolt right between the eyes! Now what are you doing here?

I looked at the woman, "Geeze, I need help. My friend is shot up all to hell."

"Not my problem! Now get out of here!"

I refused to budge, I had had it, this woman had shelter and Carth needed a place to go.

She suddenly aimed her weapon at me and started firing. Damn it, this lower city is spaced in the head. I grabbed Carth's blasters and fired at her, my blaster shots going every which way. I needed a damn melee weapon but it was either her or me and I sure as hell wasn't going to let Carth or me get killed. I finally managed some good shots and the woman dropped down dead.

I searched her body and finally found a fairly decent melee blade on her as well. I strapped it to the belt on my waist. I threw her body to the side of the room and dragged Carth into her apartment.

I quickly locked up Carth and hoped by the Force he survived while I searched out for help.

I went back to the Cantina and glared at the bouncer, "So...can I come in now?"

"Yes, human you may enter."

I entered with the Cantina and proceeded to see if I could find anyone who could help.

As I crossed the main entrance room, I saw a rodian, two twi'leks, and a man.

The man glared at them, "Go away!"

"Hey, you not talk like that. We just want to say hi to big, bad bounty hunter Calo Nord!"

I ran past them, I didn't want to get involved in some sort of bounty hunter squabble. Sure enough.

"Three…."

Calo Nord, the bounty hunter threw a flash grenade and gunned the aliens down.

I whistled at the cold efficiency of how one man could simply take down three aliens.

He glared at me, "Go away…."

I held up my hands, "Calo, I don't want to fight you."

He smiled, "Smart…." and calmly walked away.

I looked around, to see if I could find anyone that might help. My eyes rested upon a wookiee and a blue skinned adolescent twi'lek.

I started forward and the wookiee growled at me, "Why are you bothering me?"

I looked helpless and pleading, "Please….I need help. My friend, can you help me?"

The blue twi'lek frowned, "You must be new here….I am Mission Vao and this here is Big Z. Consider us your welcoming committee."

I sighed, "Yea, Mission, Thanks. But my friend…." I suddenly felt so devastated and I had no one else to turn to. I had to trust someone, this was a big risk, but call it a hunch, I felt maybe just maybe I could trust this girl to help me and so I blurted out really quietly to her, "We're Republic fugitives on the run from the Sith. My friend, he's wounded. Can….can you help us?"

Mission furrowed up her brow and said, "I've got no love for the Sith. This place has gotten worse with them here, so yea. I'll help."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks. My name is Phoenix Star."

Mission smiled, "Nice to meet you Pho...phen….Nix." She scowled having troubles saying my name and then said, "Well nice to meet you Nix."

I scowled; she had totally butchered my name. "It's Phoenix."

She grinned, "Yea….but Nix is easier to say."

The wookiee suddenly laughed and stated, "Mission can't say my name all that well either. It's Zaalbar but she insists on calling me Big Z."

I sighed, "Yea….so my friend….let's go."

Mission, Zaalbar, and I finally returned to the apartment complex. We cleared out a few errant swoop gang members in the process and Mission sighed, "Damn Black Vulcars, they fire on everyone and it makes no sense why they fire on everyone. They think they are tough or something firing on everyone."

"Tell me about it. I think that's how my friend got hurt."

We opened up the apartment and Mission whistled at the dead woman who lay a few feet away, "Woah….did you kill Selven?"

"Uhhh who is Selven?"

Mission pointed to the woman, "That would be her; she was an assassin that was contracted to kill Ulgos. Anyway there's a bounty on her head. You could probably collect it."

"I'll keep that in mind Mission. But my friend."

Mission nodded and Zaalbar went over and all three of us examined Carth. Mission sighed, "There isn't anything I can do, sorry. But there's a healer in the upper city, his name is Zelka Forn. He sometimes comes down and helps the lower city citizens. I sometimes go up to the upper city and he heals for free. The Sith don't like him, because he treats everyone without any prejudice."

"Yea, but….it's complicated in the upper city and I don't think Carth and I can get back up to the upper city at this moment. It's a long story." I knew that if I went back up to the upper city as a half-human-half alien woman that the Sith guard would send me back down, kill me, or lock me up as a prisoner. Neither of those were a great idea, plus with a wounded 'Sith', too many questions would have been asked by the Sith. Sadly our idea about how to get down to the lower city had draw backs.

Mission nodded, "Well….there's the Hidden Beks. They might be able to help you. They've been looking for Sith Armor. Maybe you can trade it for some med packs or something."

"Yea, but without that armor….we need it to get to a Jedi."

Mission's eyes went wide, "A Jedi, a Jedi on Taris. Whoa…..I've always wanted to meet a Jedi. What's a Jedi doing here on Taris?"

I sighed, "Complicated….we were involved in a fight above the planet. She was supposed to help us with the battle and well it didn't work out right. So like most of us we ended up in escape pods fleeing the destruction of the ship. We hope she's in the Under City."

"Sounds like a run of bad luck, Nix. Anyway, Big Z and I can scout around in the under city, no problem. We can find your Jedi for you."

I shook my head, "That was weeks ago, Mission. I seriously doubt she's still there in the Under City."

"Well….." Mission paused, "It's worth looking into. So Big Z and I will look for your Jedi friend and get you into the Bek Base. I happen to be a junior member."

"A junior member?"

"Yea, cuz I am too young to be an official member. But the Beks are like a second family to me. They took me in….after….well after my brother left with that Cantina trash Lena. Anyway….let me go talk to the Beks and get you in."

Mission and Zaalbar took off running to the Bek base leaving me with Carth. I didn't know much about medicine and I tried to feel for a pulse on Carth. Sure enough, I found a faint but steady pulse.

About twenty minutes later, two Hidden Beks came with a stretcher and picked up Carth. I followed them into their base.

A twi'lek woman glared at me, "Only reason we are even letting you in, stranger is because Mission said you had Sith armor. Gadon has been looking for some and you're willing to trade it for your friend's health."

I sighed, "Yea and no….I would prefer to talk to Gadon himself before I make any sort of deals."

"As you wish. You can speak to Gadon if you want, but I've got my eye on you! You try anything and you'll be vaporized before you can say "Vulkar spy"!"

I frowned and a man nearby, with strange looking eyes, beckoned me forward. "Umm Gadon?"

The man nodded, "You'll have to forgive Zaerdra. Ever since Brejik and the Vulkars began this war against us, she's been a little over-zealous in her security duties. The problems with the Sith haven't helped things. Zaerdra seems to forget that I know how to look after myself! Now, how can I help you?"

"My friend…." I wondered how much I could say to him and then decided if Mission trusted him and his gang, maybe just maybe I could trust them as well.

"It's a long story. My friend is wounded, we are Republic fugitives, we are looking for escape pods in the under city and…."

"That armor is useless if you plan on heading to the under city or to get help for your friend in the upper city. I have Sith papers that can get you up to Zelka Forn's healing facility and to the under city and… well I don't know how helpful the papers will be to you but The Vulkars stripped those pods clean within hours after they landed. It's too bad we didn't get there first, considering what my spies reported the Vulkars found, a female Republic officer named Bastila survived the crash. We Beks don't believe in intergalactic slavery, but the Vulkars aren't so picky. They took her prisoner."

I paled, "Bastila's a prisoner," I frowned, "Where is she?"

"Normally the Vulkars would take a captured slave and sell them for a nice profit to Davik or an off-world slaver. But a Republic officer is no ordinary catch. I'm afraid your friend has become a pawn in Brejik's game to take over the Lower City. He's offered her up as the Vulkar's share of the prize in the annual swoop gang race. By putting up such a valuable prize Brejik hopes to win the loyalty of some of the smaller gangs. Their numbers will allow him to finally destroy me and my followers."

I sighed, "So what can I do to rescue her? It's just me at the moment, and I can't fight all the gangs."

"I might be able to help you with this, if you'd be willing to help us. We both have something to gain here – and much to lose."

I frowned a bit, this sounded like a catch to me, and I didn't like it.

"You're still going to need those Sith papers for this by the way because the swoop race is for the Lower City gangs only. I could sponsor you as a rider for the Hidden Beks this year. If you win the race, you'll win your friend's freedom. But first you have to do something for me. My mechanics have developed an accelerator for a swoop engine. A bike with the accelerator installed can beat any other swoop out there! But the Vulkars stole the prototype from us. They plan to use it to guarantee a victory in this year's swoop race. I need you to break into their base and steal it back. You can find it by going into the under city and going through the sewers. You're going to need Mission Vao for that."

Zaerdra started complaining, "Mission? Gadon, you can't be serious! She's just a kid – how is she supposed to help them with this?"

Gadon sighed, "Mission knows the under city and sewers like the back of her hand. If anyone can help you get into the Black Vulkar's base it would be her."

I nodded, "It's a deal."

I needed those papers for Carth for one, but I didn't exactly like Gadon's plan. I needed more info about what was going on before I decided whether or not to act on Gadon's plans.

I interjected, "Oh By the way, what's up with all the shooting and fighting in the streets."

"when I lost my sight in the swoop bike accident everyone assumed I would step down as leader of the Hidden Beks and let Brejik – my most trusted follower – take over. But with my ocular implants I can still see well enough to lead this gang, and I knew Brejik wasn't ready to take over yet. Unfortunately, Brejik didn't agree with me. In a rage he left to join our arch-rivals, the Black Vulkars. A lot of the younger gang members followed him, and soon he and his followers had taken control of the Black Vulkar gang. He's been going around now showing his authority around the streets of the Lower City shooting anyone that's in the lower city, including Beks and civilians."

"But why start a gang war with the Beks?"

"Brejik is a proud man. My decision was a public humiliation for him. Maybe if I had stepped down this gang war could have been avoided."

Zaerdra snorted, "Don't fool yourself, Gadon. Brejik wants to control the Lower City gangs. If you'd stepped down, he'd have led the Beks against the Vulkars. He wanted this war, one way or another. "

I kept quiet, I kept feeling there was more to this war than what was being said, I was almost sure of it. I finally asked, "And what's with you wanting my Sith armor?"

"I like to be prepared. Eventually the Sith are going to try to drive us out of the Lower City. Sith disguises might give my people the edge we need in a crucial battle!"

"You don't like the Sith much do you?"

"A foreign army invades Taris, declares martial law and locks down all travel to and from the planet? You damn well bet I have a problem with that! If the Sith ever moved in down here all the swoop gangs would unite against them. We'd use hit and run guerrilla tactics to pick them off… their casualties would be enormous! It's just with this damn gang war….."

I smiled softly, "I get it. You'd probably be fighting or planning more resistance against the Sith if it wasn't for Brejik and the Black Vulkers, right?"

Gadon nodded, "Yes, we would."

I had learned what I needed to know about this gang war and I had a few ideas on the war in general, plus I had ideas on how to end the gang war, get rid of Brejik, and save Bastila, and none of it followed Gadon's plans. However, I needed Carth's help and support which meant at this time, agreeing with Gadon's plans so I could get Carth up to Zelka Forn's facility, "Like I said, it's a deal, Gadon. The armor is yours."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

My eyes opened and I groaned. I looked around. Where was I? Last thing I remembered was fighting in the lower city.

I saw a dark skin man by my bed, "Ahh good you're finally awake. You've been floating in Kolto for the longest."

I raised an eyebrow and he said, "I am Zelka Forn in charge of a medical facility in the Upper City. Your friend brought you in for treatment. She's been begging to see you ever since I put you in Kolto. I insisted she needed rest and told her to go home. Yet, she keeps coming back every day to check on your progress."

I cringed, the words every day, did not sound good. "How long was I out?"

"About a week, she feared the worst for you, but never let it be said that Zelka Forn would deny a Republic solider treatment."

"She told you?"

"Yes, after…."

He extended his hands forward and I looked from my bed and found, several Republic soldiers also floating in Kolto tanks. "She had a feeling she could trust me to take good care of you. Unfortunately, many of these other soldiers won't survive. Yet...I wish to make their last days as comfortable as I can."

"Well for that and my own treatment I am grateful."

A knock on the back door of the treatment room we were in and Zelka's eyes widened in fear, he whispered to me, "It might be the Sith."

I nodded, and Zelka looked through a peak hole near the door and breathed a sigh of relief meanwhile a loud familiar voice bellowed, "Damn it Zelka, it's just me…."

He opened the door and in ran Phoenix.

She grinned and came in, I was pretty sure she would have hugged me if I wasn't in bed. Instead, she grabbed my hands and squeezed them in an expression of relief and joy, "Thank the Force, you're alive, Republic!"


	15. Chapter 14: Taris: Planning

**Chapter: 14: Taris: Planning….**

 **~Carth~**

I raised my eyebrows at Phoenix's plan as we sat in our hideout. "Phoenix how does this even help us get Bastila?"

She looked at me firmly, "Hear me out, Carth. Listen to everything I say and then see if you agree with me."

I sighed, "Okay…."

"So apparently, someone set off this gang war. Not sure who started it, but I have my suspicions on it. I even suspect that it was probably Brejik that is responsible for Gadon's swoop bike accident, under the influence of an outside party."

"Outside party?"

"Yea, Carth, an outside party. After all think about this, the only two gangs that could pose a serious threat to the Sith are the Hidden Beks and the Black Vulkars. If they were organized and working together they could throw a whole hydro spanner into the whole occupation of Taris. The only group that would gain an advantage with the gangs being opposed to each other is the Sith. I am saying the Sith are the ones working with Brejik, or at least worked with him in the past. They probably tempted Brejik with ideas of power and influence at least enough of an influence in wanting him to take over the Hidden Beks."

I nodded, "I think you're right Phoenix. That's a very astute observation. Although I don't believe Lord Malak would have had enough brains to do such a thing. From what I know of Malak's strategy, he's a very, very crude leader. He'd break the whole universe to win. The only person that would have enough forethought to play a game of dejarik like this, would be Revan."

Phoenix nodded, "I agree with that, Republic. Thing is, is Brejik still talking to the Sith or not? We can surmise that Brejik probably reached an agreement with Revan in the past to start this gang war or at least tried to take over the Hidden Beks. Knowing Revan, he probably gave Brejik the device that caused Gadon to lose his sight in the first place. Gadon hates the Sith. He'd never bargain with them, but Brejik probably would. Brejik probably surmised that, Gadon would step down, but he didn't realize Gadon's determination to remain as head of the Hidden Beks. According to Gadon's lieutenant, Zaerdra, Brejik wanted a gang war anyway, even if Gadon stepped down. So think about it, in the long run Revan got what he wanted, two dynamically opposed groups, weakened and unable to pose a threat to the Sith on Taris."

"But what's this got to do with Bastila being held by the Black Vulkers? And how does this help us?"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"It has everything to do with Bastila, Carth. I am hoping that Malak isn't in contact with Brejik because if Malak has been in contact with Brejik then….there is a possibility he is aware of where Bastila is. If Malak does know where Bastila is, then why hasn't he acted yet? So either Malak knows, and is waiting to catch all the Swoop gang members in one spot. He can then wipe them all out, capture Bastila and we would be in serious danger as well. Hopefully, Malak doesn't know, I don't know about you, but I would prefer not to end up dealing with Malak or his Dark Jedi minions. If Malak doesn't know, then Brejik has gone back on his support of the Sith. Brejik is playing a dangerous game, keeping Bastila for a swoop race prize, using it as a way to buy the support of the lesser Swoop gangs. I believe Brejik has gotten too greedy for power and is overstepping his bounds. Anyway, Carth….here's my plan, we need to show proof to the Vulkers that Brejik is a Sith spy or a Sith loyalist. Most of the gang members dislike the Sith. If we can convince the Vulkers that Brejik would easily betray them to the Sith, they would leave him in a heartbeat. The information is probably in the Vulker's base, in Brejik's personal database."

Carth held up his hands, "Wait a minute, Phoenix. Didn't you promise Gadon a swoop accelerator part so you could run in the big swoop race opener? And now you're talking about undermining the Black Vulkers and all that you're talking about is assumptions at this point in time. How do we know that your assumptions are even accurate?"

"I've got a feeling about this, Carth. Just a really strong gut feeling that everything we're talking about is correct. If it's not…." I paused, "We can always go with Gadon's plan of stealing the accelerator part but my plan is better, Republic. If we get the Vulkers to acknowledge that Brejik is a traitor to Taris and to leave him, we can then convince the Vulkars that they have to unite together to stop the Sith threat by uniting with the Beks."

"You're playing a dangerous game, Phoenix. What you're talking about could unite the Sith against the Lower City. They could come down and wipe out the Swoop Gangs and the whole Lower City. "

I sighed, "Carth, we are supposed to be on the side of the Republic. Wouldn't it define our mission that we are suppose to strengthen Taris not leave it broken, like Revan and the Sith have done?"

Carth scowled at me, "Our mission is to rescue Bastila, Phoenix, not try to influence a rebellion on Taris."

I glared at Carth, "Why can't we do both, Carth? Rescue Bastila and formulate a resistance on Taris. With Brejik out of the way, and with the two Swoop Gangs united together as one cohesive unit, rescuing Bastila would be easier. We wouldn't have to deal with Brejik's back stabbing because trust me; Brejik has got the morals of a Hutt. He turned on Gadon and the Beks, how can we even be sure he won't go back on giving Bastila as a prize during the race? If we steal that part, he's going to be as deranged as a berserker hyped up on stims. He's likely to turn on everyone during the Swoop race, getting rid of him as a threat, before the swoop race is the better option, Carth."

"Phoenix, tell me how in the Force does a smuggler like you get a mind like a Republic fleet Admiral? Not only that but you've convinced me that this is a much sounder plan than the one Gadon has arranged but…."

"But?"

Carth sighed, "Ahh just wishful thinking, Phoenix. We could have used a mind like yours during the Mandalorian Wars. You may not be a soldier but….a mind like yours would have been a great asset during the war."

"I would have been terrible at it, Republic. It's taken me years to think of life as one big huge dejarik board with pieces to move here and pieces to move there. Trust me; I was a merchant first, then a smuggler. These things I've learned took time to learn, call it the life of hard knocks, Carth. I am sure you weren't the man you are now before the Mandalorian wars."

Carth nodded, "I get what you're saying, Phoenix, but….you have a very sharp mind. How can you make assumptions or come up with connections like all this with the swoop gangs and not be noticed by others by now?"

I rolled my eyes, "Carth, are you getting suspicious on me again?"

"No, Phoenix. I am just curious how a woman like you could escape notice from people for so long."

"Well apparently the Jedi thought I was of some value when they hired me."

Carth nodded, "Perhaps that's why Bastila and the Jedi took notice of you to hire you in the first place. They noticed something unique about you. Anyway, let's get started on your plan."

* * *

Carth and I stood by the elevator a Sith soldier looking at the papers I had gotten from Gadon.

"Let me see… hmmm, these look to be in order. Okay, you can go down if you want. Can't say I envy you, though. The Under City is crawling with mutants. rakghouls, they call 'em. If you see anything moving down there, shoot first and ask questions later."

I frowned, "rakghouls?"

The Sith officer nodded, "Yes, they are mutants that eat raw flesh. They start out as regular sentients that get bitten by other rakghouls and then transform into them. Most of our patrols have rakghoul serum. It counters the affects of the rakghoul virus. We're the only ones that have it."

I looked at Carth and muttered, "I don't think I am going to like this much."

We entered the elevator and the elevator spiraled further and further downward into the abyss of the Under City.


	16. Chapter 15: Taris: The Under City

**Chapter 15: Taris: The Under City**

 **~Phoenix~**

If the Lower City was suppose to be better than the Under City, then that wasn't saying much. Course, Coruscant probably was an equal match for Taris, except Taris was held by the Sith. I had spent time in the lower levels of Coruscant so it pretty much was a similarly sad fate. I looked at Carth, "Carth…..you've spent time in the lower levels of, the capital city of the Republic, right?"

He nodded, "A little…." He looked thoughtful, "And yea, I agree with you, if you're comparing the lower levels of Coruscant with Taris. The Republic could probably do more for the Lower city dwellers on Coruscant as well. But, with the war going on, it's been hard to do much of anything, plus we've had an influx of refugees from the Sith and from the Mandalorian wars, I think I remember hearing that the Jedi had a refugee support cent…."

Carth's words were cut off when two beggars approached us from the elevator

"You there! Up-worlder! Anyone using this elevator has to pay the toll!"

I looked at one of the beggars, he walked with a bit of a limp and his friend shook his fist at us, "Yeah, this is our elevator! If you use it, you've got to give us something!"

Carth looked incredulous, "I don't believe this planet! Even the beggars are trying to shake us down."

I nodded and looked at Carth, "Well Republic, what do you expect? The Sith control the Upper City with an iron fist, the Lower city is in the middle of a swoop gang territorial war, plus the Exchange holds sway, as well and this place…."

The gimpy beggar hissed, "We are the Outcasts, banished and reviled by those who dwell above! In the filth and darkness we claw out a wretched existence, scavenging and begging just to survive long enough to see another wretched day."

"It's oppressed, Carth. It all drifts downward, from the Sith at the top, from the Lower City, to this wretched place. Now do you see why we need to do something aside from rescuing Bastila?"

"I agree with you, Phoenix, but overreaching is still overreaching. We are only two soldiers; we can't fight a war here."

I shook my head, "Not a war, you thick headed Republic, I wasn't planning on that, just support those that can later on do what we can't do. All that oppression from the Sith, from the swoop gangs, and the Exchange slowly effects even these people down here. You're blind; Republic if you can't notice how these three different levels of the city are affected by what's going on around us."

Carth muttered a bit, "You sound a bit like a Jedi."

"Maybe I do, but you have to admit it does make sense in the fact that each level of the city we've come to, the hardship, the filth, and the depravities of civilization are all affected in various and alternating degrees. It's all in a cycle of its own."

Carth added, "I suppose that's your upbringing on a farm that you're drawing knowledge from, with cycles and seasons."

I grinned, "Of course, Republic. When you grow stuff, then you notice acutely how life and seasons play out. Wasn't your planet a farming community too?"

Carth sighed, "Yes, although farming bored me, which is why I signed on with the Republic Military Forces."

The beggars continued their pleading for credits, "This is our village. We live here in the Under City. You have to pay us five credits for using our elevator."

I sighed and dug into our credit pouch, "You poor wretches. Here's 20 credits to buy some food and clothing."

"Credits, my brother! We have credits! Now we can buy food and medicine!"

The other beggar sudden grabbed the credits from his brother, "Hush, or the others will hear us! They'll want our credits! We have to hide them!"

A woman came running, "Go on, you two! Get out of here! I'm sorry about that... those two beggars give everyone in the village a bad name! We aren't all like that, you know. Most of us are good people."

Carth responded, "I'm sure you are, miss. It's just too bad your little welcoming committee is there to give people a bad first impression."

"My name is Phoenix Star, Who are you?"

The woman answered, "My name is Shaleena... you're from the up-world, aren't you? I've... I've never seen it. I was born here in the Under City. Is it as nice as they say up there?

I gave a long sigh, "It's okay….it's nothing special."

"Not to you, I suppose. But you're probably used to its beauty by now."

I didn't have the heart to dash this poor woman's ideas of what the Upper City was like, frankly from what I saw, the Upper City was just as festering with decay and corruption brought here by the Sith and people who detested aliens. It was like all that went on above soaked down like filthy and polluted water into the roots and eventually resided in the Lower and Under Cities. Carth was right; I was very much connected to my farming roots.

Shaleena convinced me not to say anything when she stated, "I've never been to the surface, but sometimes I think I can see it in my dreams. The sun, the sky, the stars... it all sounds so... so... so wonderful. Gendar, the leader of our village, tells me I should spend more time trying to improve things down here and less time dreaming about something I can never have. Maybe he's right. You probably think I'm a fool, having dreams of a place I've never even seen. But when I was little, Rukil used to tell me stories of what it was like up there."

"Rukil? Who's that?"

Shaleena smiled, "Rukil's the oldest man in the village. The kids call him Rukil Wrinkle-Skin, but he's a kind man. He used to tell me the greatest stories when I was a little girl. I still like to listen to his tales about the Promised Land, even though I know they're just legends. But it helps to make the Under City seem less... less dark, somehow."

I nodded, "Hope isn't a bad thing. We all have to cling to something for comfort when times are bad. Maybe that's foolish but sometimes it's needed when things are painful. Anyway, can I ask you something?"

She shook her head, "I don't know much, you're better off talking to Gendar or Rukil. They are in the village."

I nodded, "What can you tell me about the village?"

"Well, I was born here for starters. My parents were Outcasts; banished to the Under City for some crime or other... they never really liked to talk about it. Everyone here is an Outcast... or the descendant of one. It's tough down here, but we survive. I guess it's easier for me, since I've never known anything different. Some of the people have given up all hope; they've become bitter and depressed. But most of us are good people... despite what our ancestors may have done. Gendar could probably tell you more or maybe Rukil. You could talk to them if you want."

I could tell the girl simply wanted to talk to us because she was desperate to latch onto someone from the Upper City. I knew we had to move on, "Well thanks for the information."

The girl seemed deflated, "Oh... okay. Well, if you ever need anything, or if you just feel like talking, come back and see me. I hardly ever get a chance to speak to someone from the up-world."

I smiled softly and said to Carth, "Seems like a nice girl, sad she's getting punished for something her parents did. Anyway….this whole damn planet seems to have been bad even before the Sith,"

Carth nodded, "True, can't blame the Sith on that. The Jedi came here once and liberated the planet from its corrupt leaders, but seems like its gone back to its old ways."

"Like weeds, Republic. Damn weeds. They always grow back; you have to root them out. It gets tiresome after awhile."

We walked down through the village and a man slowly limped up to me.

"You – you come from the world above! Is this the time of destiny, then? Is this a portent of the salvation of my people? Or merely another false sign to mislead us from the path? Are you the herald of prophecy? The beacon to guide us through the darkness? Or are you merely another harbinger of shattered dreams and unfulfilled promises?"

Carth raised an eyebrow at me, "Be careful... this one might be crazy enough to be dangerous."

I nodded, "Don't worry, Republic, there's something about this…." I paused a moment staring straight into the old man's eyes. His eyes seemed old, but kind. I saw no madness within them. What I saw was a sincere man, who even though he might seem deranged was passionate about what he believed.

Carth frowned, "Phoenix….what are you doing?"

"The eyes are a good judge of character, Republic. You can see a lot out of some one's eyes."

The man spoke, "Speak to me, up-worlder! Tell me what fate you unleash upon us – salvation or damnation! Speak up-worlder – I beg you!"

I paused, "I don't know if I have anything I can give you…."

"You are uncertain. Bewildered. Perplexed. Understandable, I suppose. Even after a hundred years of life I myself still become confused at times. Perhaps I can make things more clear. Some things, at least. My name is Rukil, the oldest Outcast here in the village. Rukil Wrinkle-Skin, the children call me sometimes."

"Ahh you're the man that Shaleena mentioned, something about a Promise Land. My name is Phoenix Star, by the way."

Rukil smiled, "perhaps you are a potent of good fortune to us, woman, reborn of fire and flames."

I sighed, "Yea, that's what my name means, but I doubt I've been reborn out of anything."

Rukil chuckled lightly, "Perhaps you are of more importance than you realize.

"So….what do you want of me, Rukil?"

"Once I was honored for my wisdom, but over time the villagers fell away from the true path. Eventually there was only a single apprentice who followed me – and now she is gone, too."

"Apprentice? True Path?"

"No, no, no. Not yet. I must be wary. Careful. You may be a false savior. Dare I share my secrets with you? No... Not until you prove yourself."

"How can I prove myself, if...I have no idea what you want?"

"My apprentice is... lost. I sent her out into the Under City to find... well, I cannot tell you. Not yet. Sadly, my apprentice has not returned. Please, up-worlder – will you help an old man? Will you seek out my apprentice in the Under City? Her name is Malya. I must know of her fate, whatever it may be. I must know what she... found."

I sighed, "If I find anything yes, I'll help you."

Carth frowned, "Phoenix, we really need to keep on the track of finding Bastila, not get distracted by these random things."

"I think there is more to this than meets the eye, Republic. Besides, if we find his lost apprentice, we find her, if not, then nothing is really lost in the process."

Rukil smiled, 'I wish you luck, up-worlder. Come speak with me again once you have discovered the fate of my apprentice."

I watched as Rukil slowly limped back to his hovel.

Carth looked like he was about to be testy, "I know you want to help but we're running out of time. Malak could find Bastila any day now,"

"Republic, these people need hope. I needed hope when I lost my family. I didn't get it. Let me try….please…." I gave Carth a mournful pleading look.

"Alright….alright…." Carth muttered, "Although I feel like I am going to regret it."

I grinned, "No you won't."

We walked around the village but we still couldn't find Mission, despite the fact that Gadon said she could often be found here.

I walked up to a man, "Excuse me….can you help me?"

"I'll try and see what I can do for you. I am Gendar, the leader of this village. Although you have to excuse me for asking, why have you come to this dark and sunless place?"

I sighed, "That's complicated, and I'd rather not say. But Gendar, why do you even live here in the first place?"

"We are the Outcasts – shunned from the surface for our crimes and banished here to the Under City. We banded together to form this village that we might survive in this hostile environment. I am the leader of this village: as my father was, and as was his father before him. Many of us have been here for generations, our ancestors cast down long ago. There is no return to the surface for us, or our descendants. But somehow we manage to survive amidst the filth and roaming bands of deadly rakghouls. "

"Seems like a horrible place to live."

"Life down here can be difficult. It can break the spirit... many in the village have become bitter and hopeless. Especially those newly cast down. But life goes on, and we must try to make the best of what we have. And maybe someday we will find a better life... Ha! Listen to me. I'm starting to sound like Rukil."

"Yea, I met Rukil. He seems nice enough. Anyway, about those rakghouls…."

"The rakghouls are monsters, hideous mutations who feast on the flesh of our villagers. Their diseased jaws can infect those they attack, transforming the victim into one of those abominations. We know of no cure for the disease, and for the good of the village we must banish any who become infected, lest they transform and turn on us."

"That sounds horrible…."

"There isn't much we can do, Up-Worlder. We have no cure for it. Although I've heard the Sith have a cure for it. They don't apparently share it."

"Maybe I can change that…."

Gendar frowned, "Be careful, Up-Worlder, if they find out you've taken their cure…."

"Yea, punishment, nothing new, I'd do it just to stop your people from suffering. There's been enough suffering going on around here. Anyway, have you seen a twi'lek and a wookiee around here?"

"Yes, I have seen this twi'lek many times, though I have never spoken to her. She and her wookiee companion often pass through our village on their way to explore the sewers."

"How can I get to the sewers?"

"There are two entrances into the sewers from the Under City: one to the north-east of our village, the other to the south-east. But the sewers are dangerous, Upworlder. If you dare to travel those dark tunnels you would be wise to go heavily armed, unless you wish to become a meal for the rakghouls and other foul creatures."

"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks, Gendar."

He nodded and we continued on our way and found our way to the exit, I heard a woman cry out, "Up-Worlder…please….please help me. My husband was exploring for salvage and…."

She paused in her plea and looking beyond the gate, "Hendar! Run! "

The guard shook his head, "I can't open the gate. I won't risk the village to the rakghouls."

I looked at Carth, "Come on Republic. We're going to have to go outside anyway."

Carth nodded and I said, "Open the gate….I'll handle the rakghouls."

The guard looked incredulous, "You would risk your life for a stranger? Heh. You are brave, up-Worlder. I will open the gate for you, but you've got to be quick. In a few seconds I must close and lock it again."

"Yea, no problem….I have to go outside the gate anyway."

The guard opened the gate and Carth and I went out. I grabbed my duel bladed Echani blade and went into combat. I cringed at the creatures that came at us, pale, hideous and slime covered creatures that hissed and started biting at us, as if they were crazed with hunger.

"Keep away from the jaws, Republic. They could infect us."

He nodded and fired his blasters. I, on the other hand had no choice but to go straight after those creatures and their gaping maws." I focused on their jaws and their claw like hands because that was the only weapons they had.

Hendar meanwhile fought against them with me. We managed to take them down and he sighed a deep sigh of relief as he ended up inside the gate. He paused, "Thank you, Up-Worlder. I was trying to see If there was anything left of those Republic Escape pods, but they have pretty much were stripped clean."

I nodded at Hendar, "It was no problem, Hendar. Stay safe."

I turned to Carth, "Come on Republic, let's see if we can find Mission Vao."

We walked around the outside of the Under City fighting off rakghouls when Mission came running at me, "Please, you have to help me! Nobody else is going to help me. Even the Beks won't help me. But I can't just leave him there – he's my friend! You'll help me, won't you?"

"Mission what's wrong?" I knew in a heartbeat I had to help Mission, after all, Mission had helped me when Carth had been out of commission.

"It's Zaalbar. He's in trouble – big trouble! We have to help him. If we don't they'll sell him into slavery!"

"Slow down, Mission, what's going on?"

"Me... me and Zaalbar were just wandering around here in the Under City. You know, looking for stuff we could find, just kind of exploring. We do it all the time."

Carth added, "I guess with a wookiee at your side you've got to figure you can handle the odd rakghoul attack."

Mission sighed, "Oh and speaking of finding stuff…." She dug through her pack and pulled out a duel bladed lightsaber, "I found this…."

Carth spoke out, "Where did you get that?"

"I found it….around the Republic Escape pods."

"That looks like Bastila's," Carth said.

I sighed and looked at the lightsaber and took it from Mission. I felt as though an electric current went through me. I rubbed my fingers over the lightsaber, it felt oddly familiar to me, "A Jedi without a lightsaber. That's not a good thing, Carth."

Carth nodded, "No it's not. And how in the Force does a Jedi lose their lightsaber?"

Mission looked pensive and I said to her, "Zaalbar….who took him?"

"Gamorrean slave hunters. We didn't even have a chance to run. Big Z threw himself at them, and he roared for me to run! I... I took off; I figured Zaalbar would be right behind me. But there were too many of them – he couldn't get away. They're going to sell him to a slaver – I just know it!"

I sighed, "Okay Mission, I'll help you. Yet, we need your help as well. We have to get into the Vulkar's base."

Mission said firmly, "It's a deal-as soon as we get Big Z back, I'll show you a way into that Vulkar base! Now, come on – We have to find Zaalbar before they sell him to slavers – or worse!"

Carth spoke up, "Do you know where he's being kept?"

"The gamorreans make their camps in the sewers. I bet that's where we'll find Zaalbar – and that's where I'll show you the secret entrance into the Vulkar compound."


	17. Chapter 16: Taris: Under City Exploits

**Chapter 16: Taris: Under City Exploits**

 **~Phoenix~**

With Mission joining us, we continued our quest to find Bastila. We headed on our journey to get to the sewers. Although part of me wondered how an adolescent twi'lek got stuck on Taris with a wookiee. "So Mission, how exactly did you and Zalbaar get together?"

Mission smiled softly, "Well Nix, that's a…."

I glared at her, "My name is Phoenix, Mission. Not Nix. It's Phoenix."

Carth suddenly laughed, "Gee, I didn't realize you were touchy about your name, Phoenix."

I rolled my eyes, "Well….I am. Nix isn't my name."

"And my name isn't Republic, Phoenix."

I threw up my hands exasperated, "Fine! I give up. Yet, be warned. I don't like being called Nix."

Mission debated whether to go on and she finally said, "Well…anyway, Nix. We just kind of fell in together. It ain't easy on your own here in the Lower City- everyone's always looking to push you around."

Carth added, "So we've noticed. Still, you seem like an odd pair."

"When I met up with Zaalbar it seemed like a good match. I knew we could look out for each other. With my street smarts and his muscle, we make a great team. Anyway, we met when some Black Vulkers were picking on him. "

I suddenly laughed, "Really, picking on a wookiee, that rates pretty high on stupid."

"Hey, no one said that Black Vulker's were smart. Anyway, I yelled at them and said, leave him alone you core slimes and I threw myself at them trying to protect Big Z. I got pretty banged up but then Zaalbar got upset at this and he ended up protecting me. Since then we've been together through thick and thin. I don't know how Zaalbar got here though; he doesn't like to talk about it. Something about some trouble back on his world that he was fleeing."

"Well all that matters is you have a good friend, Mission."

"Yea, I know, and Zaalbar really does need me. I mean, he maybe big and tough, but when it comes to street smarts, he's kind of gullible."

I suddenly saw a patrol of Sith as we were walking around, and my mind went back on the fact that the Under City people needed rakghoul serum. Although I doubted that the Sith would give up their serum voluntarily.

I whispered to Carth, "Heads up, Republic, be ready for a fight."

Carth frowned, "What? Phoenix, you're crazy to pick a fight with the Sith!"

"For rakghoul Serum, these guys likely have it and do you honestly think they are going to surrender it?"

Carth sighed, "Okay. I still don't think it's wise to attack a patrol."

"Yea, normally I'd agree with you, Republic. But I don't think it's going to alert any of the Sith if one of their patrols goes dark. There are rakghouls down here, and how are they going to know if that patrol ended up attacked by us or by rakghouls."

Mission suddenly spoke up, "Well I am with Nix on this. The Sith have the serum and Zelka Form has been looking for the serum as well. It's not right that these bullies have it and no one else."

I nodded, "So it's settled, we attack this patrol, get their serum and make it look like the rakghouls did it."

Carth sighed, "Alright. I still don't like this."

I shook my head, "No one said you had to like it, Republic. Yet, think of the lives we will save. Sometimes you have to take lives to save others. You've fought in the Mandalorian wars, we're fighting the Sith, This is war and no one is completely innocent. Remember, the greatest good for the greatest number."

Carth sighed, "I suppose you're right, Phoenix. Yet, I've heard this type of philosophy before and it came during the Mandalorian wars."

"Which the Republic won."

Carth rubbed his hands through his beard, "True, Phoenix, but at what cost? All we got afterwards was Revan, Malak and the Sith and they thought the same for a time, the greatest good for the greatest number."

I rolled my eyes, "Discussion over, Republic. Morals and ethics go out the airlock when people need to be helped. We are at war, with the Sith. Don't forget that. We need the serum and that outweighs the morality of the situation."

I walked up to the Sith patrol and the leader barked, "You there! Civilian! This is a restricted area! What are you doing down here?"

"Look... I have got all the proper security papers." I pulled out my paper work and waved it in front of the guard.

"Security papers? Oh... you're one of those trackers the Commander sent down, right? They should have given you an armed escort – it's nasty down here! We've already lost one patrol... we figure the rakghouls got them. We've had so many encounters with those things. Plus we've had several skirmishes with looters from those Lower City swoop gangs. I'm telling you, we should just stay in the Upper City where we're in control! "

"You lost a patrol? How many of you are down here?"

"Oh, is that why you're down here? Search and rescue? I didn't think they would send anyone. They were in the southern section of the Under City when we lost contact. I would have gone to investigate, but my orders are to search for survivors and items from those downed Republic pods... even if it means leaving another patrol to die. "

"Why don't you just give up the search?"

"Hey, I'd never disobey my orders... I'm not a fan of court martials and executions. I was just talking, you know? Nothing anyone has to mention to the Commander."

I snorted, "Well I don't like that tone! Maybe I will mention this to your commander. It's no skin off my back if you end up being court martialed and executed."

The leader glared at me, "You're questioning the Sith? How many people do we have to kill before the rest of you learn some respect? Well, I guess it's time for another lesson. Patrol... attack!"

I grabbed my blade and attacked the leader and Carth and Mission backed me as they provided cover fire with their blasters. I then moved my attack to the rest of the patrol as I took on the other two members of the Sith patrol. The patrol went down fairly easily, but then the worst happened. The scent of blood brought up a gang of rakghouls.

"Damn it…." I quickly searched the patrol and grabbed a pack of rakghoul serum on them as well as a few weapons and other things from them. I quickly, plopped the majority of my loot along with the serum in my pack and said, "Republic let's get out of here."

I watched in horror as the rakghouls began to scavenge, consume, and eat the dead Sith. We ran away from the scene. My chest was heaving and we leaned against an old pillar while we all regained our breath. I pulled out the rakghoul serum from my pack and stared at it. All that risk for some vials of medicine.

Mission smiled at me as she too joined me and looked at the serum, "Way to go, Nix!"

I sighed, "Nasty business for some medicine, Mission. But this will help out so many people." I plopped the rakghoul serum back into my pack.

Carth stood scowling and I could tell he wasn't happy. "Alright, Republic, let's get back on the search for Bastila, Zaalbar, and Rukil's missing apprentice."

He nodded and we continued our journey to the sewers. Mission suddenly spoke as I saw what looked like another patrol of a sort, "Hey Nix….look sharp, there's one of Davik's kath hound, enforcers."

I frowned, "Davik?"

Mission nodded, "Davik's part of the intergalactic crime syndicate, but I guess everyone knows that. But I hear he's got a new ship for his smuggling operations – the _Ebon Hawk_. I don't know much about space travel, but I hear that ship's fast enough to break the Sith blockade. Of course, this is all just second-hand rumor. "

My eyes lit up and apparently so did Carth's and I grinned, "Thinking about how to get off this, rock, Republic?"

"Of course, Phoenix, after we rescue Bastila, we are going to need a way off this planet. So Mission, do you have any idea, where he keeps his ship?"

"If Davik does have a ship, he's got it locked up in his estate. Nobody gets in there, except the people working for Davik and the Exchange. "

I nodded, "So if we do get a way off this planet, we should play nice with Davik and his employees."

I smiled as I walked up to an apparently well muscled man; he had a bunch of Mandalorian tattoos on him. Yep, Mandalorian, which shouldn't surprise me any as the galaxy was filled with Mandalorians that seemed rather lost and confused on what exactly their purpose was after they lost the war. Seriously though, the war was in the past. Despite what the Mandalorians had done to my family and it still hurt. I knew, hard as it was we had to move on from the past. I knew these warriors could be a big help against the Sith or they could help the Sith against the Republic. Yet, since I wasn't in any high military circles, I had zero influence on what I considered to be lost potential. Instead, they were wasting their time like Bendack Starkiller or what muscle man here was doing here with Davik.

He nodded at me and I said calmly, "Who are you?"

He frowned at me, probably because this wasn't the best place for a conversation, "I'm someone you don't want to get on the bad side of, and I'm not one for small talk particularly here with all these rakghouls. I told Davrik, that all the good stuff was already taken from those downed Republic Escape pods but he keeps sending me back here just to check to see if we've missed anything. Take it from me, girl, leave; all the good salvage has already been taken."

I nodded but I needed to gain as much info about him or Davik, he might know more about Davik's ship or some way we could team up, "What can you tell me about Davik?"

"What are you, an Off-Worlder? Everybody knows Davik. He's a member of the Exchange. You know – the interstellar crime syndicate. Smuggling, gambling, extortion – Davik controls it all here on Taris. That's why I'm working for him. But lately the Lower City gangs have been giving my boss some trouble."

"So I've noticed. I am working on trying to fix that."

He smiled, "You've got some grit, if you think you can stop the issues with the Vulkers and the Beks. Anyway, I've got the salvage we need and take my advice, girl. Get out of here, like me and my men, before the rakghouls make a meal out of you."

I snorted, "I am not afraid of them. I can handle myself. So you're just going to run back to the surface like some coward?"

He glared at me for a moment. But I knew that Mandalorians respected toughness and so I could tell that he probably respected me for being tough on him, "Normally I'd make you regret those words, but I'm not wasting another minute down here. I'm responsible for this whole company, and they won't survive down here much longer. Come on boys…let's move out!"

I watched as the Mandalorian walked away with his group. Carth seemed to be in a bad mood, as he was sulking. Damn it, I needed his support, not to have him still holding a grudge about me getting rid of a Sith patrol, at least I assumed that's what was eating him. So his words were antagonistic towards me, "Messing with a Mandalorian isn't wise, Phoenix."

"Oh please, Republic. I was just trying to get on his good side. You've got to know how to handle yourself around a Mandalorian. They bellow, you have to bellow back. Besides, he knows I exist and that's all that matters. He has ties to Davik and Davik has the Ebon Hawk. Maybe…."

Carth groaned, "What's going in that mind of yours, Phoenix?"

"Nothing at the moment, I swear. Yet, he's the only possible lead that has connections to someone that has a ship that could get past the Sith."

Mission added, "Geeze Carth, Nix is only trying to help and all you're doing is criticizing her."

I nodded, "Thanks for the support, Mish."

Carth sighed, "Yea, you're right, Mission. I've been a bit hard on Phoenix after that altercation with the Sith. It's just I am accustomed doing things one way and apparently Phoenix is use to doing things another way. And it's hard to admit, well that her way seems pretty efficient at times."

I nodded and then said, "And I am sorry, if I over stepped my bounds, Republic. It's just that I am use to taking charge of things on my own. I've always been a loner, Republic. So this working in a team thing is kind of new to me."

He nodded, "Okay, so let's get back on the mission."

Meanwhile Mission frowned at the nickname I had given her, "Mish?"

I grinned, "Hey well if you call me Nix, I have every right to come up with a nickname for you and Mish seems like a good one for you."

"Alright, fair is fair. Although I thought you were going to call me Blue."

I rolled my eyes, "Yea, way too obvious. Mish works way better."

Mission sighed, "Last person that called me Mish was my brother."

"Brother?"

"Yea, but I don't really want to talk about him at the moment."

"Fair enough, come on you two. Let's get to rescuing Zaalbar and Bastila."

We finally reached the sewers but I found a rather gruesome discovery before we entered. I looked over a chewed up corpse, probably chewed on by the rakghouls, and a pack. I looked at the pack and drew out a flickering datapad. I added a power pack to it and was able to read it. Some of it looked like maps and random entries from the dead person's life but finally I caught some of the info at the end _, ~I have uncovered evidence that others have been seeking out the fabled land, and that their treks have led them into the sewers. I have decided that I must go there as well. ~_

"This must be Rukil's missing apprentice. Well as soon as we finish finding Zaalbar and getting into the Vulkar base. I will let Rukil know what happened. Besides, this data pad says there were others who ended up in the sewers, maybe we will find more info for Rukil going into the Sewers as well."

I looked at Mission, "Okay, Mission, lead the way."

Mission smiled, "Okay, Nix….let's go get Big Z!"


	18. Chapter 17: Taris: Lower Sewers

**Chapter 17: Taris: Lower Sewers**

 **~Phoenix~**

As Mission opened the doors to the sewers, I gagged,"Damn, it smells like something crawled and died in here. How do you and Zaalbar manage?"

Mission smirked and pulled from her pack some oxygen masks. She handed one to me, Carth and put one on herself. "No problem, Nix."

I put on the oxygen mask which filtered out the filthy air and I breathed a lot easier. "No wonder the gamorreans like this place."

Mission chuckled,"Yea, it's not that bad. Oh and you might want to use a refresher afterwards."

I grumbled,"Wonderful."

Carth stated,"Phoenix, I didn't know you had an issue being dirty."

"I don't Republic; I just don't like knowingly crawling around in filth. After all think about it, all this comes from the Upper and Lower Cities. Do you know how many sentients live above us and how many use facilities and refreshers? Now think about the fact that we are crawling around on their wastes. Except..."

I suddenly grinned, "Maybe it will repel the Black Vulkars."

Mission smiled and then said, "Gee Nix, that's a good way to look at it. Who wants to fight someone covered in filth? I know I wouldn't."

I suddenly laughed and wiggled my fingers as if they were oozing with brackish filth, "Beware the filth monster, terror of Taris."

Mission started laughing,"Good one Nix."

Carth snorted,"Okay you two, enough with the joking, Let's get moving."

I took some glow sticks from my pack and handed them to Carth and Mission. The light was very dim and we needed the glow sticks to help us see. We came to the door and I opened it, rakghouls squinted at the light of our glow sticks and suddenly in a frenzy they started attacking. Mission and Carth started fighting and brought their rakghouls down. Suddenly I screamed in pain as a rakghoul took a bite out of my arm. I shivered as I fell down to the ground. I could feel the spread of infection from the bite. I broke out in a feverish sweat. Was this the primary stages of infection? Fever? The Sith had said that eventually I'd transform into a monster that craved raw flesh. I looked over at one of the dead rakghouls and touched it. Slimy mucus layered skin. If I was burning with fever then maybe the rakghouls needed the mucus layered skin to keep their bodies cool. The thought was not a comforting one.

Infected, I was infected. "Republic….serum…" Mission's blaster brought down the rakghoul I had fought. Meanwhile, Carth dug through the pack and suddenly jabbed me in the arm with the antidote. I felt the feverish burning lift as the antidote coursed through my body. Carth ripped up a piece of his uniform and bandaged up my arm. He shook his head, "Thank goodness you got that antidote, Phoenix."

I breathed heavily, my arm throbbed. I dug through my pack and dug out two med packs and injected myself. "I know Republic. If I didn't, I'd be a rakghoul and I would have begged you to kill me before I turned." Carth shook his head, "I couldn't have done that, Phoenix." I scowled, "Damn it, Carth. Don't let sentiment muddle your thinking." He then shook his head, "But it didn't happen and how can you talk about your own life so coldly?"

I sighed, "Because I know the risks, Republic. The infected don't care about the uninfected. Killing me would have been a mercy. Trust me if our position had been reversed, I would be agonizing over it too. Yet, I know that it would be a kindness to you. We've fought rakghouls, Carth. They were sentient at one point. Yet, as soon as they become Rakghoul, they lose all that made them sentient in the first place."

Mission looked at me, "I'd have killed you, Nix, if you had…..turned."

I patted Mission on the arm as I got up, "Thanks Mish. But let's not talk about this anymore. We have the serum and as soon as we finish our mission we will help those that are infected in the Under City and, we will give the rest of the serum to Zelka in the Upper City. That way no one will ever have to worry about infection ever again."

I got up and my arm was still sore, "Republic you're going to have to take the lead in the fighting. My arm throbs."

Carth sighed, "We should head back to the Under City and get you healed first before we get back to looking for Zaalbar."

I shook my head, "No. We continue forward. I'll be fine, Republic. The med pack will kick in eventually. I promised Mish that we would find Zaalbar and that's what we are going to do."

I flexed my arm a few times, already the concentrated kolto was doing its job. "Take the lead, Republic. I'll be alright, already the kolto in the med pack is kicking in but it will take some time."

Carth shook his head, "You know something, you're crazy, Phoenix."I grinned, "I know. Republic, that's why you can't do without me."

He shook his head, "Damn you woman, you're impossible."

I smiled and said nothing more. Mission rolled her eyes, "Geesh….."

I frowned, "What?"

Mission sighed, "You guys act like a couple of love sick banthas."

I coughed, "No we don't, Mish. We're just two comrades in arms. We have a lot of camaraderie. We've been through a lot. We tease and we joke because if we didn't, we'd go nuts over all the stuff we've gone through."

Carth nodded and agreed with me. "That's right, Mission. We've been through a lot but that doesn't mean we feel anything for each other."

Mission shook her head, "Yea, whatever. I just call it like I see it."

I nodded although I had a feeling that maybe Mission was right. Yet, duty was more important to me than any sort of hormonal reaction. It was called combat attraction. It happened because we were two soldiers that had ended up fighting in very close quarters with each other. I knew Carth knew that that was what we were experiencing. Yet, Mission mentioning it, it was like having a rancor in the room. We couldn't deny we both felt something but it was better to publicly deny it for the sake of the mission. Hopefully, after all this was over we would go our separate ways because it was better that way. If anything happened to either one of us, as it usually happened in war, having such feelings could be more detrimental to our mission than helpful.

I laughed at Mission, more out of wanting to deny what I felt, than acknowledging the truth of the situation, "Seriously, you're just an adolescent twi'lek, what do you know of these things?"

She snorted, "I am not a kid, Nix, and I know more than what you think."

I sighed, "Republic, tell her that there's nothing serious between us." I gave a firm look at Carth, hinting that he should confirm what I had said.

Carth nodded, "That's right, Mission. There's absolutely nothing between me and Phoenix. We're just two really good comrades in arms and we respect each other."

I slightly winced inside but knew that Carth probably felt the same as well. I picked up my blade from the floor, "Enough talk, we need to save Zaalbar."

Mission nodded but she added, "I don't understand what you're both afraid of. Seriously nothing wrong if you do like each other."

I internally sighed, ah to be young and not understand the complexities of war and relationships.

I decided to change the subject while we walked through the sewers, "So Mish, you mentioned you had a brother."

"Griff wasn't the most popular guy, he had his faults. But I still loved him, you know? Sometimes people don't understand. I never knew my parents; my brother always looked out for me. He's the one who brought me to Taris. I was just a kid, only five. But I remember the trip – if you could call it that. We were stuffed inside a packing crate in a star freighter's cargo hold with just enough food and water to make the trip. Not exactly first class, you know? "

I looked incredulous, "How could your brother do that to a five year old?

"I don't know the whole story – I was pretty young. But my brother owed a lot of money. Might even have been a few arrest warrants out for him, I don't know. The only way to get off the planet was to smuggle ourselves out. I mean, I don't want to make it sound like we were criminals… well, maybe my brother was. See, this is why I don't like to talk about it. It makes Griff sound worse than he really was. My brother had his problems, but he always looked out for me."

I chuckled lightly, "Well we all have our faults and he's family. You have to stick by your family."

"He gambled. And drank. And he was always borrowing money for his latest get rich quick scheme. But he had a good heart, you know? He taught me how to survive. He showed me how to slice into a computer's security system; how to get inside a locked building without the entrance codes, and how to spot a wealthy mark for a quick shell game."

I smiled, "Well Mission, those sound like some pretty handy skills to have."

Carth shook his head at all this, of course Republic couldn't understand. I was a smuggler, I knew the value of having the skills that Mission spoke of and they were good skills to have.

Mission grinned, "Yeah, Griff did right by me." She then sighed," I really miss him since he left. I keep hoping he'll come back some day. He promised me he would.

"Why did he leave?"

"He fell in with a bad crowd. It's all Lena's fault. She's the one who took him from me! Just batted those long lashes at him and off he went!"

I remembered, Mission had briefly mentioned a Lena and her brother when we first met, but I was so worried about Carth at that time.

"Who's Lena?"

"I don't want to talk about Griff and Lena – just the thought of that space tramp makes my blood boil! Subject's closed as far as I'm concerned! If I'm going to be any help to you I can't be worrying about my brother running off with some intergalactic skank! So, let's get back to saving Zaalbar."

I nodded, "Okay, fair enough."

We went through more stinking filth ridden rooms of the Sewers clearing out rakghouls. However, opening another door, we must have been getting closer because we ran upon gamorreans fighting rakghouls. I let Carth and Mission fire away at all of them as my arm was still weak. I hated to leave all the combat fighting to them but I'd only put us all at risk if I fought. I'd only fight if the rakghouls and gamorreans ended up coming into their blaster range. Sure enough the gamorreans crossed our path as they finished fighting off the rakghouls. I fought them, my arm still feeling a bit sore but between my sword and Mission and Carth's blaster fire, we bought them all down. I was curious though, "Mish, how far do these tunnels extend anyway?"

"Oh….they are quite extensive. Some of them I've explored, and others I haven't. I am thinking the sewers at one point in time might have been some sort of base of some kind."

I frowned, "Why do you think that?"

"Well there are rooms with bunks in them and some locked footlockers. I scavenged them earlier on, they had some old grenades and some med packs in them."

I nodded, "I see, well that's interesting."

Mission smiled lightly, "I know, that's why I love the sewers, there's a lot down here that not even the Beks or any of the Lower City people know about. It's a world all its own, Nix. "

"Well I kind of see the appeal of your own hidden place, Mish. Yet, it sure could smell a bit better."

Mission laughed, "True, but hey I think it's an adequate trade off to have your own secret place to roam around and explore."

We opened a few more doors, fortunately, no rakghouls or gamorreans awaited us and instead I found a few corpses. I found some old data pads and adding a power pack to them I was able to read something about the search for the Promised land. There were maps and odd cryptic details to it. The other data pad had even more details about it.

I said to Carth, "Look Republic, Looks like that old crazy Rukil might have been right about his fabled Promised Land."

Carth shrugged and then nodded, "Looks like you might have been right about him after all."

"Yea, I hope these are helpful. Anyway….back to our search" I dumped the data pads into my pack and we continued on.

We opened a few more doors, did some more combat with rakghouls and gamorreans and then as I opened another door. I saw it, an energy barrier. I stood staring at it and Mission piped in, "That energy shield leads to another section of the sewers. The entrance to the Vulkar base is somewhere past there. I've got the codes to lower the shield, but we have to rescue Zaalbar from those gamorrean slavers. Don't worry – we can come back after we find Big Z."

I sighed, I seriously wished we could go on past the energy barrier; I began to seriously worry that we might be running out of time. But I did make a promise to Mission to rescue Zaalbar. She smiled again, "I know, Nix. I know. It's not like it's going anywhere."

I nodded, "Yea, it's just I can't help thinking about Bastila. We've spent so much time….I am beginning to worry about her. I hope…." I paused, "I hope she's alright."

Carth nodded, "Same here, Phoenix. Same here. But worrying about her isn't going to help us. She's a Jedi, and we're just going to have to trust that she'll be alright. She has a good command of the Force and hopefully she can be obscure enough that Malak and the Sith won't find her first."

"Yea but her lightsaber…."

Carth firmly ordered, "Enough fretting, Phoenix. Maybe it's for the best she doesn't have it. If the Vulkars….found it then they would know she was a Jedi and that would only complicate things even worse. Right now, they think she's only a Republic officer, and that on its own is a good thing."

I took a deep breath, Carth was right. I don't know why at this moment in time I was suddenly worrying about Bastila. Maybe it was because I felt that we were getting really close to her. I was feeling tired and I suddenly wanted this whole mission to be over with. Yet, even with finding Bastila, we still had to find a way off the planet.

"I know…." I managed a faint wane smile, I had Bastila's lightsaber on my sword belt and I lightly rubbed the hilt and its buttons. Somehow rubbing it made me feel just a bit better, the lighsaber eased my nerves and made me feel a bit more relaxed somehow. Touching the lightsaber, was like having Bastila's presence close to me, which made little sense to me, how could an inanimate object make me feel calmer? Maybe it was what a lightsaber stood for with the Jedi. Yea, that had to be it. A lightsaber represented Bastila and the Jedi. The Jedi represented order, peace, and harmony in the universe. Yes, that had to be it. Although part of me disagreed with that assessment because what I felt rubbing the lightsaber and the buttons felt deeper, almost like a deep spiritual and binding connection. I frowned a bit, that wasn't normal. I scowled a bit inside myself and made a firm mental decision, _snap out of it Phoenix, this is no time to have some sort of metaphysical connection with some damn Jedi weapon._

"Okay…..let's go get Zaalbar."

We walked down the hallways and came to a door, I tried to slice it open but it wouldn't give. Mission frowned, "Hmm, this seems older than a lot of the locks on the sewer doors. I think I can manage to get this open."

She tinkered with the door and it suddenly opened, sure enough there were a whole bunch of gamorreans in the room. I caught sight of Zaalbar, bound up and he suddenly roared and snapped whatever bounds that held him. I grinned and we all pressed forward. Yet the gamorreans swarmed around the wookiee, focusing more on the wookiee than us. Another door opened and more gamorreans entered, threating to overwhelm us. Mission and Carth were cut off from Zaalbar and me. This was going to be trouble. Zaalbar roared in pain, a gamorrean axe wedged in his arm. I cringed, that looked painful. Zaalbar, yanked the axe from his arm and started swinging the axe in a blind fury. Yea, a wounded wookiee was not a good thing, it made Zaalbar fight harder in a deranged manner. I fought alongside the wookiee. "Zaalbar look out!" A gamorrean was about to fling a gernade at Zaalbar. Zaalbar turned dropped the axe and grabbed the gamorrean by the arms. The gamorrean squealed in pain as Zaalbar snapped the gamorrean's arms as if they were twigs. The gamorrean squealed and ran away, that had to hurt. I grabbed the axe and flung it at a gamoreaan, the axe hit the gamorrean firmly in the head. The gamorrean dropped squealing in pain and then laid still.

Mission and Carth managed to clear away their horde of gamorreans and I turned to Zaalbar, he was wounded. I breathed in and out slowly; I quickly tore a piece of my own clothing, "Hold on Zaalbar, let me get that wound of yours treated." He nodded as I injected four med packs into the wookiee and I took the torn piece of my clothing and bound up the wound. Zaalbar moaned out his thanks, he looked at me with an impressed look in his eyes.

We had finally freed Zaalbar and now we could get back to finding Bastila. I sighed taking in how far we had come in our mission and suddenly I heard Mission state, "Big Z swearing a Wookiee lifedebt to you. Wow – this is major. Do you realize what this means?"

"WHAT!"I felt overwhelmed. Having a wookiee by my side wasn't exactly what I wanted. Although a wookiee lifedebt could have its upside. I'd have a loyal companion by my side. Yet, also having a wookiee by my side made things not so subtle. My days of walking quietly in the shadows or being completely and totally ignored were gone. I groaned a bit, "Yea, it means I got a walking carpet following me for the rest of my days."

"Hey – don't make fun of the lifedebt! This is serious business, you know?"

I sighed and nodded, "Yea I do. It's a very solemn commitment by a Wookiee."

Mission nodded, "A lifedebt is the most solemn vow a Wookiee can make. It means he'll stay by your side for the rest of your life – wherever you go, whatever you do, Zaalbar will be with you."

Carth seemed amused by it and was chuckling a bit as he could tell I wasn't completely into the whole lifedebt thing.

"Very amusing, Republic I don't see you volunteering to take a lifedebt on; after all you helped saved Zaalbar too."

Carth shook his head, "Oh no Phoenix. You're the one who agreed to help Mission in the first place. I just agreed to it because we needed Mission to help us get into the Vulkar base. Maybe next time you won't rush head first into things without thinking them through."

I fumed, "Damn you Republic, I hate you."

He laughed, knowing I didn't really hate him, oh no, saying I hated him, was like saying the exact opposite. "I know you do, Phoenix. I know you do."

Zaalbar suddenly stated, "In the presence of you all I swear my lifedebt. Forever after I will be by your side, Phoenix Star. May my vow be as strong as the roots of the great Wroshyr trees of Kashyyyk."

I sighed, "I don't suppose there is any way out of this is there?"

Mission shook her head negatively, "Sorry, but there's not much you can do about it. Zaalbar's already sworn the lifedebt and it's not something they can just take back. This is a sacred irreversible vow. Oh and I guess this means you're stuck with me too. Wherever Big Z goes, I'm going. I almost lost him once – it's not going to happen again."

I groaned, "Why won't this nightmare end?"

"Hey – don't underestimate me! I may be young, but I'm quick and plenty smart. You just give me a chance and you'll be surprised at how useful I can be."

I nodded, "I know, Mission. I know and I am glad to have you around. It's just….well I wasn't exactly expecting all this. It's quite a lot to take in."

Mission nodded, "Hey, I understand. Must be a lot, I mean crashing on Taris, stuck under a Sith Quarantine, looking for a Jedi. Yea, I get it. But hey, you've got me now, Zaalbar, and Carth. You're not alone and you have lots of friends here to help you."

I lightly squeezed Mission's shoulder. "Yea I know and I appreciate your support. You were a big help when Carth was injured. So…." I grinned and shook Mission's hand. "It's good to have you here Mission, and welcome aboard."

Mission smiled, "Wow….so I am officially a part of your Republic team, right?"

Carth nodded, "Yes you are, young lady, you and Zaalbar are both part of our team. So let's get into the Black Vulkar base and find what we're looking for."

Mission nodded, "The Vulkars put up a force field to keep the sewer dwellers out. I'm one of the only non-Vulkars on Taris who can get you past it. I managed to get the codes off the pocket of a Black Vulkar who had a little too much to drink in the cantina one night. I just hope the rancor monster isn't still there."

I nearly deadpanned, "Rancor? Are you serious?"

"There used to be a rancor monster that made its nest in that part of the sewers. Pretty much eats anything it can get its claws on. That thing is huge!"

I shook my head, "How in the Force, did a rancor get in the sewers to begin with?"

Mission shrugged, "That's a good question. Maybe the Vulkers put a baby one in there as a security measure, or maybe it's always been in there. No idea. Luckily rancors aren't too bright. I was able to sneak past it before, so I'm sure we'll figure something out. That is, unless you want to change your mind."

Carth and I looked at each other and shook our heads, "I am afraid that's not an option."

"Okay then, off we go."

Zaalbar was quiet and didn't say anything, after all he had sworn a lifedebt to me and I said,"Zaalbar is there anything you can add about all this, after all I am sure you know the sewers just as well as Mission."

Zaalbar responded,"I will honor my lifedebt but anything else I will not say. I can bash in a door or help you in combat but anything else, it would be best to ask someone else."

I sighed,"Okay….well if you do have anything else to say, let me know. You're not just a wookiee lifedebted to me, you're a person that has opinions and feelings too."

Zaalbar nodded,"Thank you, Phoenix Star, for respecting the lifedebt I honor."

I shook my head; I wasn't sure if I would ever understand this wookiee and so we continued on our journey.

We traced our steps back to the energy field and Mission smiled, "Okay…."

She pushed a few buttons and codes on a computer console and the energy field went down.


	19. Chapter 18: Taris: Rancors and Vulkers

**Chapter 18: Taris: Rancors and Vulkers**

 **~Carth~**

We had certainly been through a lot. I had to admit that so far the mission to find Bastila had taken a lot of twists and turns. I had been thinking about everything so far. Phoenix seemed to be our wild pazzak card. Her decisions always seemed to be a kilometer a minute. Her mind was very, very sharp as well as her tongue. I had to admit I was upset at her taking down a Sith patrol. It seemed a bit out of character for her to be aggressive enough to provoke the Sith to combat. Yet, I could easily see why she had done so. The Under City needed the rakghoul serum and if she hadn't gone out of her way to do so she also would not have benefited from it when she had been infected.

Mission was right, I was starting to feel something for this woman. Yet even Phoenix, knew the wisdom of denying the feelings we both were starting to feel. I also couldn't forget my wife, she had died on Telos and I couldn't completely let go of the death of my wife or my son. I couldn't let them rest till the man responsible paid for their deaths, with his life. So when Phoenix firmly stated that all we had was a soldier's camaraderie I readily agreed with her. However, I could see the pain in her eyes at the denial. Yet, I knew after this mission was over I wanted her around. I would be her mentor; I'd be a better mentor than Saul had been to me. She would be a natural fit into the Republic military. A promotion was definitely in order for her after this rescue mission. I just had to talk to Admiral Dodonna about getting her on a regular military commission rather than the mercenary work the Jedi had paid her to do. She probably would jump the ranks pretty high what with her innate abilities.

Maybe she would be able to take down Malak, something that even the Jedi didn't seem to be able to do. Her quickness to make connections like with the swoop gangs was something I knew the Republic would want to latch onto. Even her readiness to accept grim realities, like the own possibility of her death, amazed me, yet horrified me that this woman would accept the ultimate sacrifice, her own life. Yes, this smuggler gun runner needed to be in the Republic Military. Although, how was I going to be able to allow Mission and Zaalbar on this? The two had readily attached themselves to Phoenix. Poor Phoenix seemed less than enthused about having a wookiee lifedebt. She accepted it because, well it simply had occurred and Phoenix was a good-natured gregarious sort that took whatever happened with a shrug and a grin.

As we walked through the next level of sewers, I said to Phoenix, "Phoenix, have you thought about your life after all this is done and over with?"

She sighed, "Not really, Republic. I guess whatever assignment the Jedi need me for."

I paused then steered my course, "Have you thought about maybe signing up for the Republic Military? You said you don't have a ship to smuggle anymore. You have a natural quickness that would go really well with planning out military tactics. You could go far, you know."

She suddenly laughed, "Gee Republic, I think that would be a horrible idea. I am unbent and undisciplined. The life of a soldier really isn't me. It might suit you, but not me. I have a habit of saying whatever comes out of my mouth, regardless of rank or discipline. I also act far more quickly than the slow bureaucratic process that obviously the Republic military or government have. I'd probably get into trouble with everyone because my whole mentality is act now and accept responsibility later. Don't try and mold me into something I am not, Carth." She suddenly sighed, "Don't get me wrong, I am flattered by the opportunity. Yet, I just don't think it would work out. I am too unconventional."

I nodded, she was right. Although damn it, if conventional wasn't working for this war then maybe it was time for the Republic to try unconventional.

I sighed, "Let me talk to my superior officer after we get off this planet. I am pretty sure we can find something that would fit for you. You have potential Phoenix, and I am not about to let it be squandered because of your personality, background or your unconventional methods."

She smiled softly, "It's sweet and considerate of you to think of me, Carth." She looked uncertain and then said, "Alright Carth, if you honestly think my talents can be of use to the Republic in some form or fashion, go ahead. I'd be surprised if they do accept me."

I nodded, "That's all I ask, Phoenix."

The upper sewers still were rife with rakghouls and we cleared them out.

We finally reached a segment of the sewers and a sealed door. Phoenix bent down and saw a severed arm clutching hold of a data pad and what looked to be some sort of vial with a chemical compound. She made a face, "I don't even want to know how this came to be."

Mission nodded, "Me neither Nix, although I recognize the colors on the jacket sleeve arm. Those are Bek colors. Although how on Taris a Hidden Bek came this far is beyond me, it must have been before the Vulkars set up that energy field."

Phoenix held up the data pad and read it. She scrunched up her face and then latched onto the vial with the chemical compound.

"The data pad says we need to put this compound into something, a corpse or anything organic, something a rancor will eat along with a grenade. Apparently the chemical compound along with the explosive reaction of the grenade which will give the rancor a belly ache and it will explode."

I snorted, "It did not say that."

Phoenix chuckled, "Okay so maybe I paraphrased that last bit, but anyway the compound with the grenade will explode and kill the rancor."

She then motioned for Mission, "Mish, I think since you know more about this rancor and what lies beyond this door. You should be the one that does this. Do you have a stealth unit?"

Zaalbar suddenly moaned out his disapproval. Mission grinned, "Don't worry Big Z. I'll be back here before the rancor even notices me."

Phoenix nodded, "Don't worry, Zaalbar. I'll cover her if something happens. I am not going to have Mish throw her life away needlessly."

I watched as Phoenix took off a stealth unit off her waist and handed it to Mission, gave her the vial with the compound and gave her a grenade and then said, "Nothing rash, Mish. Use this stealth unit, put the vial and grenade into something organic and get back here as soon as you can. Don't stay in the room because rancors are indiscriminate about their food choices."

Mission shook her head, "Okay….geesh….don't worry about me Nix. I am not a child."

Phoenix stated firmly, "Don't act tough on my account, Mish. Just get in and get out, period!"

Mission nodded and I watched as Mission sliced the door open, turned on Phoenix's stealth unit and quietly went into the room.

I watched how Phoenix took charge so easily and naturally with Mission and Zaalbar. I felt a surge of pride and admiration for her. I wanted to get closer to her and…. _Get it together, Onasi. You admire her skill in combat and in strategy, and that's it._ Damn Mission for getting me to think of Phoenix in other ways rather than a professional soldier's relationship. Yet, maybe that wasn't completely true, I had been extremely possessive of her when she was hitting on that Sith soldier for the armor. Perhaps, I did like her more than what would be considered appropriate. Yet, who was I fooling. Phoenix probably had done the math as I had that such relationships during wartime were fraught with peril. I had already lost my wife Morgana and it had darn near killed me inside. Getting involved with Phoenix, I could see the peril already. The fact that I didn't want to kill her when she was infected with the rakghoul virus was a sign that both of us should turn away from such things, although that was easier said than done.

Phoenix suddenly spoke to me, "Hey Republic….are you awake upstairs?"

"Huh?"

She laughed, "What you need is a good rinse in the refresher and a cup of caff. You're starting to tune out and I am kind of feeling the same way as well. I have no idea what time it is. Damn Under City, although I have got a feeling we've probably have been at this for 12 hours or more. I do know this, as soon as this is over with, I need to rest, which reminds me…." She dug in her pack and pulled out some stims. "Not a big fan of these Republic, but I can tell both of us are running on empty and we're probably going to need something to keep us going, so load up." She promptly injected herself with some of the stims she had dug out.

I gave Phoenix a faint smile and nodded. I took a couple of stims from her and injected them in. I felt a rush of artificial strength and energy come flowing in. The bad thing about stims was the crash would really be bad later on and could only be reversed by more stims, which eventually could lead to addiction, and then ended up with you blowing out your whole adrenal system in the process. However, Phoenix was right; I was running on empty, so taking the stims was a necessary evil.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

Zaalbar moaned and carried on about me going into the room with the rancor. "Geesh….Big Z, stop worrying about me. I am gonna do what Nix said, turn on the stealth unit, plant the grenade into something….probably a corpse from one of the rancor's last meals and then get out of there."

Zaalbar shook his head, "I wish you wouldn't risk your life so readily."

"Hey Nix needs me, Big Z. She did save your life, y'know. I kind of owe it to her."

"The lifedebt applies to me, not to you, Mission."

I snorted, "That's not fair Zaalbar. I owe Nix too. If she hadn't come with me, you'd still be with the gamorreans."

Zaalbar sighed, "You take too many risks, young cub."

I glared at Zaalbar, "I am not your cub."

He chuckled, "No, maybe not. But you're the closest thing to offspring I have."

I smiled and hugged him, "Aww….don't get all gushy on me Big Z. I'll be fine."

I turned on the stealth unit and disappeared and blended into the shadows. Having a stealth unit was fun, I grinned and stuck my tongue out at Carth. Yep, old geez….couldn't see a thing. I really needed to get a stealth unit of my own. This would make lifting things from Lower City apartments so much easier. Although I doubt, Nix, Carth, or Zaalbar would of approved of me stealing. Well not really stealing, more like donating to charity, after all I was a poor twi'lek without a family. There were several not so legitimate charities that claimed to raise funds for orphans, so I would be doing it on a small scale for myself.

I sliced opened the door and looked, the rancor was stretched out on the floor. I could hear low snarling, or was it snoring? I couldn't resist but take a look at the rancor….a corpse was hanging out of it's mouth. Perfect. I just had to plant that grenade into that corpse and beat it. I quietly walked closer and closer to the monster. The monster snarled, bantha poo, it must smell me. My heart beat heavily in my chest. Don't wake up! Please don't wake up!

The rancor suddenly got up and started sniffing around. The corpse fell from it's mouth. I cursed under my breath. Damn it. I reached the corpse underneath the rancor and I plopped the grenade and compound into the corpse's dead clammy mouth.

The rancor growled. It's hands reached wildly for the corpse. Damn, whatever was in that compound made the rancor act like a sentient on spice. I turned off the stealth unit and the rancor let out a massive cry. Run….run….. before the rancor decided not only to munch on the corpse but take a bite out of me. My lungs felt like they were going to burst. I made it outside of the rancor's lair. My lekku were all askew and Zaalbar moaned, "I knew I shouldn't have let Phoenix send you."

I grinned, "I am fine, Big Z."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Mission came back in the room, "Mission accomplished!" She said with an air of a soldier.

I smiled, "Good work, Mission."

The room suddenly shook, that rancor must have been huge for the outside of the hallway to shake as it came forward.

Suddenly there was a loud explosion and a groan as the rancor collapsed and shook the room and the hallway with its loud thud on the floor.

Phoenix grinned, "Well done, Mish. Well done. Now let's get into the Vulker base."

Mission nodded, "Say Nix, what exactly are we looking for when we get inside."

Phoenix sighed, "Well Mish, that's complicated. Hopefully Bastila, if we can find her. If not….then Brejik's personal database, I am looking for certain files, and if those files are not there then a swoop acceleration part."

Mission nodded, "Yea, I know about the swoop part. One of the Beks became a traitor and stole it right out of the base when they defected to the Vulkers. Gadon was mad; there was blood in the streets for at least three days because of that. But I don't get it, why Brejik's personal database?"

Phoenix looked at me and I looked at her and she responded, "Complicated, Mish. We believe that Brejik had some dealings with the Sith."

Mission's jaw dropped and Phoenix held up her hand to tell her there was more. "Anyway, we believe that Darth Revan encouraged Brejik to betray the Beks and start this gang war. The Sith have the most to gain by keeping the lower city and the gangs in chaos. We believe that the gangs are the best in forming a resistance against the Sith on Taris. If we can find information that proves that Brejik is or was working with the Sith, we hope to use it to convince his followers to abandon him. Everyone hates the Sith, including the Vulkers. If they know what a Hutt spawn he really is, we are hoping to convince the Vulkers to form an alliance with the Beks and the rest of the gangs. We want to encourage a resistance against the Sith, Mission. One of these days, the Republic will return to claim Taris once again. They are going to need freedom fighters to lead the charge. There are only two of us here, Mission and even though we can't fight a war to free Taris, we want to lay the ground work for it when the time comes."

Mission nodded, "Makes sense, Nix and yea, I agree with you about Brejik, he's as rotten as they come. It would make sense that this whole gang war was started by the Sith to keep Taris from forming a proper resistance. If you need any slicing into the Vulker's databases, I am your gal."

Phoenix smiled, "Great, Mish. We are going to need your slicing skills. I am passable at best into slicing. What about Zaalbar?"

Zaalbar raised his head and growled out, "I am not into slicing. However, if you need muscle I can provide it."

Phoenix then turned to me, "How about you Republic, got any skills, I don't know about?"

I chuckled, "I am probably just about as useless as Zaalbar. I am a pilot, Phoenix. I fly ships. I can shoot my blasters and that's about it. Although I can probably do some security overrides. And what about you, Phoenix? What are your talents? Aside from your natural leadership skills."

I watched Phoenix suddenly turn beet red with embarrassment. "I am not really a leader, Carth."

"You could have fooled me, Phoenix. You're a natural at it, that's why I really think the Republic needs someone like you. You're also very handy with a melee weapon, have a gift for charming the pants off me and others, you're really good at formulating plans and carrying them out. I think our chances are really good that you can convince the Vulkers to leave Brejik, provided we provide the evidence you need. Anyway enough talk, let's move out."

Phoenix had become pretty quiet afterwards, she said nothing as we moved past the dead rancor and I wondered if I had embarrassed her and so as we walked I spoke to her, "Credit for your thoughts, Phoenix?"

She sighed, "Go away, Republic."

I frowned, "What? Did I upset you?"

"I know you want to box me in, Republic."

"What do you mean by that?"

"You heard me, box me in. Make me a respectable member of the Republic."

"Phoenix, we need you, you'd be a great help to the Republic, and you're a natural leader. I can tell you this and keep it under that armor you are wearing, we are losing this war."

She was quiet and she then stated, "I see and you want to use me like a fifty credit piece, Republic. A good luck charm and then after that….I will be nothing more than a passed along coin that gets rusty and old with the passage of time."

"What are you babbling about and what brought this on? A moment ago you said it was okay for me to tell my superiors about you."

"Look, I don't want to be tied down to anybody or anything, it's bad enough I've got Mission and Zaalbar tied to me but I like my life just the way it is."

"Phoenix, you're going to have to accept your life has been radically altered. It's not going to be the same ever again."

"I suppose so, but I want a bit more say in my life and I want to be…." She sighed, "I guess the best way to say it is a free spirit."

I laughed, "You are a free spirit, Phoenix. You really are a Phoenix, that mythical bird that flies with trails of fire coming from its tail."

She smiled lightly, "Now you understand that I can't really be like you or the other military leaders you are beholden to. I'll break or worse I'll burn out. I'll help the Republic anyway I can, but don't try and contain me, Republic. Please don't."

"What are you afraid of Phoenix?"

She sighed, "I am afraid, that I will be used like a hydro spanner or any other sort of tool in a tool box and then left to rust and be forgotten or worst be taken advantage of like a rich man who doesn't know who his true friends are."

I squeezed Phoenix on the arm, "Then trust me, Phoenix. I won't let anyone do that to you. I'll fight and protect you if anyone does that to you."

She smiled wanly, "Thanks Carth that means a lot to me."

She suddenly put a finger to her lips and whispered to me, "Black Vulkers at 12'o clock." She prepared to use her Echani blade and I pulled out my blasters. Mission and Zaalbar did the same. Then she paused, "Wait Republic, I've got an idea."

She grinned a bit and said, "Mission can I have my stealth unit back?"

Mission nodded and handed Phoenix the stealth unit. She put it on and then turned it on and disappeared into the shadows. The next thing was a groan and a grunt as the two Vulkers collapsed in a heap as suddenly Phoenix un-stealthed herself and clunked them both over the head with Bastila's lightsaber hilt.

"Help me out, Republic. Get them out of there Swoop jackets and their Black Vulker gear."

I suddenly began to understand Phoenix's idea. "What about Mission and Zaalbar? I think they are going to know that they are not Black Vulkers."

"Don't worry, Republic I've got that planned too." She held out a couple of binders and handed one to Mission and one to Zaalbar. Zaalbar moaned, "No, I am not going to go into the Vulker base as a prisoner."

Mission shook her head, "Take it easy, Big Z. Nix knows what she's doing. She doesn't intend to hand you over to the Vulkars as a prisoner."

Phoenix nodded, "Correct, and I don't feel like fighting every Vulker we come across either. Disguising ourselves as low ranking members should keep us from having to fight every Vulker in the base. You said it yourself, Mission that the Vulkers are not the brightest bunch on Taris. So hopefully claiming we are Vulkers should fool some of them. As for you, Mish and Zaalbar, you will be our prisoners we cart around. I can't disguise a blue twi'lek or a wookiee from them so it's either wait outside here or….go in as prisoners."

Zaalbar moaned, "I will not leave you, Phoenix Star." Mission nodded, "That goes for me as well."

Again, I was impressed by Phoenix's quick ideas and quick planning. We had planned on attacking the Vulkers and now she had changed everything by having me and her disguise ourselves as Vulkers.

She grinned a bit as she took an eyepatch from the guard and plopped it over her eye, she put on the Black Vulker clothing and she said to me, "What do you think, Republic?"

"You look really menacing, Phoenix. All you need is a pink stripe in your hair and you'd really look like a punk swoop bike gang member."

She laughed, "Amusing idea, Republic. I'll keep that in mind for the next time I go undercover."

I put on the other guard's clothing and Mission laughed, "You are pathetic Carth. You look like an old geezer."

I frowned, not appreciating the comment at all, "And you're just a kid with a wookiee, and Taris is no place for a kid to live on her own – even a kid who's got a Wookiee to look out for her."

Mission fumed, "Hey, I ain't no kid! And I look out for Zaalbar as much as he looks out for me. Big Z's my friend, not my babysitter! All I get out of you Carth, is a damn lecture."

"Don't you snap at me, missy! You want a lecture? How's this: only bratty little children fly off the handle because of a simple comment."

Phoenix coughed, "Hey cut it out you two. I don't need this right now. I am trying to figure out how to unlock this base door and I get some sort of holo soap opera going on here. Whatever is going on, stop it. We need to focus on getting Bastila out of here."

"I don't have to listen to you, Carth! You ain't my father – though you're sure old enough to be! So keep your lectures inside your withered old head, 'cause I don't need 'em!"

"And I sure as hell don't need this. Let's just drop it and get back to what we were doing."

Phoenix rolled her eyes at both of us as she continued to work on slicing the lock and then grinned, "Got it!"


	20. Chapter 19: Taris: Brejik and Bastila

**Chapter 19: Taris: Brejik and Bastila**

 **~Phoenix~**

I worked on getting us into the Vulkar base while Carth and Mission squabbled among themselves. I tried to tune it out, only telling them once to cut it out. I don't know why Carth kept harping on me on wanting to join the Republic fleet. I felt like he pressured me the first time and I reluctantly agreed, because I liked Carth and I wanted him to be happy. However, when he asked about my skills and then harped, no bragged about me, to Mission and Zaalbar about what he considered my strengths were and that I should be in the Republic Military. I suddenly grew apprehensive and afraid. I felt like walls were closing in on me, it was like being in that damn escape pod all over again, unable to breath, and unable to move.

What I spoke to Carth was true; I didn't want to be tied down. I didn't want to be used by anyone. Deep down inside me, I feared being used, betrayed, neglected, and abandoned. The feelings were akin to Carth's deep seated trust and betrayal issues with Saul Karath. Where my fears came from I wasn't entirely sure. Maybe the Mandalorian wars or was it later on? Although, I couldn't remember when exactly I had been betrayed or even felt such feelings. I thought hard, as I cycled through the security settings to open the base door, trying to come up with the reasons for my fears and all I came up with was dark inky blackness. No memory at all. Not a thing, not a reason, not a purpose for why I was afraid of being used, betrayed, neglected or abandoned. It made me pause and frown. The more I tried to reason it out, all I felt was a dull throb in the deep recesses of my brain. _Give it up, Phoenix; you'll only give yourself a massive headache if you do._

Yet, back to what I was sure of, my life guaranteed me one thing and one thing alone. I called the shots and I was only accountable to myself. True, it didn't make me important, but I felt free. I was able to do what I liked and what I pleased and I was happy. I honestly didn't want to be a military leader, I didn't want to be someone important, and I sure as anything didn't want to be a fracking hero either. I just wanted to be Phoenix Star, the smuggler and gun runner, was it really too much for Carth to let me go and let me be who I wanted to be?

I finally managed to open the base doors and I grinned, "Got it!"

We entered the Vulkar base fairly unobtrusively. Most of the Vulkers barely acknowledged us at all and that in itself was a good thing. I grinned a bit, "Hey Republic, I wonder if they have got good Tarisian Ale here?"

Carth groaned, "Phoenix this isn't the time to think about drinking."

I rolled my eyes, "Missing the point, once again, Republic. We're supposed to be Vulkars and I am sure we can find out more about what we're looking for at the gang's private mess and cantina. I don't know about you but walking around in circles gets a bit pointless after awhile. Anyway it's always a good time to think about a good solid drink. These swoop gang members are going to think we're a bit off if we don't imbibe just a little."

Mission nodded, "Nix is right, the best way to find anything out is at the Cantina and the gang's mess area."

We found a computer console and I pushed Mission forward and I quietly undid her binders and let her download a map of the base onto my data pad. I then redid her restraints. I was quietly formulating a plan on how I was going to get into Brejik's personal database.

I stood staring at the data pad for the longest and Carth coughed, "Phoenix….."

"Oh sorry, I was just thinking about a plan on how to get to Brejik's database. Anyway….we have Mission and Zaalbar here. What if we gave Brejik a gift of his enemies?"

Zaalbar suddenly moaned, "I thought you said I wasn't going to be the Vulkar's prisoner."

"You're not Zaalbar. I'd fight and die to save you if that even happened. But you need to realize a ploy when you see one. But the fact is, I've got to get access to Brejik's database and I have to find a way to do so and so far our options are not many."

Mission nodded, "I get it, Nix. You present us as Hidden Bek enemies. Distract him somehow and we get the info you're looking for."

Carth muttered something under his breath.

I frowned, "What was that?"

Carth sighed, "I've seen your distractions before."

I shook my head, "And it would have worked except I had to deal with a jealous trigger happy pilot blaster whipping a guy over the head."

Mission suddenly laughed, "Wish I had seen that."

Carth coughed, "Okay, that's enough on that, there's only so much abuse I am going to take on this."

"Fair enough, okay Mish, I think Carth is at least entitled to some peace, so let's drop it."

I grinned and slapped Carth on the back, "Besides he's had to deal with my winning personality since we both crashed landed on Taris. Isn't that right, Republic?"

Carth nodded but said nothing more and I could see sheer relief in the poor pilot's eyes. Sure, I liked ribbing Carth over most things but I had a feeling that I had hit a bit of a sore spot with him as that was the first time he had complained about being abused. Maybe it was time to give Carth some space, at least on this issue.

"So….let's drop by the gang's cantina and mess, maybe we can grab a bit to eat and something to drink and find out where Brejik is."

Carth finally spoke up, "Is that wise?"

I shrugged, "No different than going into the Lower City wearing Sith armor. Don't fuss, Republic, act tough. Grab a plate of grub and chat with the others we'll get something out of this."

We finally entered the mess and sat down, a woman looked pensive. She shook nervously as she placed food and drink before us. She then whispered to me, "You're….you're….not a Vulkar. I see all the Vulkars that pass through here, and I don't recognize you."

I grabbed her by the wrist, "Shh….be quiet."

She started to struggle against my holding her by wrist, "Please, don't hurt me – I just serve the food here, that's all! I'm not like these others – I'm not even a Black Vulkar. Please don't kill me!"

I said coldly, "Then don't say anything about me and my group not being Vulkars."

She nodded, "I won't….I swear…."

I gave a very, cold menacing glare, "Good. Now explain yourself, who are you?"

"My name is Ada. My father owed Davik some money, but he couldn't pay. Davik killed my father and sold me into slavery here at the Vulkar compound to pay off the debt."

I ate some of the food with my free arm and drunk a bit of the Tarisian ale, "Disgusting…" I muttered. "Don't worry; I just want to ask you a few questions."I let go of her wrist.

The girl nodded and rubbed her sore wrist.

I said firmly, "Where's Brejik?

The girl shook her head, "Finding Brejik is a suicide run, his room is heavily guarded, that is if you're planning on killing him."

I snorted, "I have gifts for him." I pointed to Mission and Zaalbar. My friend and I are with the Hidden Beks. We are defecting, even though the girl isn't even a proper Bek. I am sure; Brejik would be interested in her and her wookie friend."

Mission looked at me, I think she wasn't sure if I was pretending or if I really was going to betray her to the Vulkars. Her face betrayed honest fear. She whimpered lightly, "Nix?"

I cuffed her in her lekku and she flinched in pain. Zaalbar growled at me and Carth mouthed to me, 'what the frack are you doing?'

Ada sighed, "I can take you to him, although he normally doesn't like newly defected Beks, but since you have two prisoners with you to prove your loyalty. I think he might overlook it."

I nodded, "Good."

The girl got up and I quickly mouthed to my friends, 'trust me'

We followed her down the hallways and she paused at the room, three Vulkars leered at the kitchen slave. I pushed my way forward, "I am here to see Brejik. My name is Nix, I was with the Beks. My friend here is Nasi. We've brought Brejik a gift of loyalty."

The guards spoke among themselves and then apparently were talking to someone on a communicator. The doors to the room suddenly opened and we went inside. The room was darkly lit and filled with twi'lek slaves dancing to music. A lot of the swoop gang riders were laughing and carrying on. There was food piled up on the table, as well as some of Brejik's loyal followers. In one corner of the room, I saw a woman in a cage. My eyes met hers and hers met mine. I felt suddenly pulled to her, the feeling was to ignore my plans completely and help her above anyone else. However, her gaze was only for a moment. She seemed slightly disoriented, but I wasn't sure if that was the case, she had what looked like a neural restraint around her neck. My heart ached suddenly and I wanted to rip the restraint off her neck with absolutely no care or thought to my own life. Carth whispered in my ear, "There's Bastila…."

I nodded; part of me raged inside, how dare these filthy gang members hold a Jedi! However, if I killed Brejik, my plans would unwind. Patience was better than rashness at this point. I needed to find those files. I needed to unite the swoop gangs. Killing Brejik wouldn't do that, as much as this scum deserved to die, I had to think of the bigger picture. I needed to find proof that he had been allied with the Sith. A dark skinned man motioned for me forward. I walked forward. "I am not familiar with you, Nix, are you a new to this planet?"

I nodded, "I am. Gadon welcomed me into his gang but I was unsatisfied with how he runs the Beks. I heard you ran things differently and I am interested. I've brought Mission Vao and her Wookiee as a proof of my loyalty, I assume you are Brejik?"

The man nodded and he smiled, "I see, it's unusual for Gadon to allow new members, particularly off-Worlders but I suppose he's desperate for members that he would recruit you. However, it appears your loyalties are fickle."

Mission hissed, "You traitor…."

I smiled nice touch Mission, nice touch. Zaalbar roared as well, his rage barely contained.

He motioned me and Carth over to a seat close by his table. I looked over at Carth and he looked at me. I grabbed him by the hand and squeezed his hand more out of a matter of reassuring him that I was not betraying Mission or Zaalbar. I carefully decided I needed a new plan; I managed without anyone noticing quietly loosened the restraints on Mission and Zaalbar's binders. I managed to whisper quietly, "You know how to escape, right? Spend the time, finding those files I need, Mission. I know and trust you to do that."

She hissed back and suddenly bit me on the hand, if that was what I got as affirmation then Mission was good, except now my hand was bleeding. One of the guards slapped her hard.

Brejik laughed, "Mission Vao. You do realize you are the joke of the Bek's, right?"

She shook her head, "Whatever Brejik I am not a stinking traitor like you are!"

"At least I was a Bek. You aren't even a proper member. How long Mission? How long have you been running with the Beks and you haven't even been a member?"

"They… they said I was too young!"

Brejik laughed, "And you believed that! Your skills and the skills of your wookiee friend made you more than qualified to be a member of the Beks. Gadon used you like he did me. I offer you a choice, Mission. Come join the Vulkars willingly. I will never make fun of you or your skills like Gadon has, you will be a true equal."

"Yea….." I could tell Mission was wavering and she hesitated when she stated, "But your Vulkars have tried to kill me more than once!"

"That's because you were with the Beks. I respect you, Mission, enough to offer you this chance to join the Vulkars. So what do you say?"

I spoke up, "You could be a lot of help, Mission." I hoped that my words told Mission all she needed to know that I didn't want her to betray Gadon but by accepting Brejik's offer she would be freer to roam around and do what we needed for our mission.

Mission nodded, "You're right. I'll join you, Nix, and Nasi, against the Beks. Come on Zaalbar, you know the Beks don't need us when they couldn't even be bothered to make us members."

The guards undid the binders fully and Brejik smiled, "Food and drinks for the newest members of the Black Vulkars!"

I knew as anything else, we were playing a very dangerous game. Yet, like any pazaak game, the rewards would be huge if we succeeded.

 **A few hours later….**

Brejik and the party of Vulkars were fully passed out all around us. Me, Carth, Mission, and Zaalbar were the only ones awake. Thank you, Tarisian ale! I had encouraged Brejik and his officers to drink and drink some more till they were all passed out. As much as I loved drinking, I didn't really touch all that much and most of my drinks ended up on the floor. I had looked more like a sloppy drunk than a true one. My friends had pretty much had done the same. I watched as Mission smoothly pick pocketed Brejik's personal room key and had gone to a side room deeper inside this room. I looked at Carth and Zaalbar, "Follow Mission, help her find those files we need. I'll get Bastila out of here." The two nodded at me and followed after Mission.

I went over to the cage but found the cage was open and a freed Bastila. She looked at me and I looked at her.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

For weeks I had been a prisoner of the Vulkars. I was patient. I had to be. I had to wait for the right distraction in order to free myself. However, I was quite surprised to see who the cause of my distraction was to begin with. I looked at the woman before me. No….it couldn't be. I felt dumb struck. **Revan.** She had come all this way and apparently with Carth Onasi as well. She had put on this whole display with the Vulkars and here she was. Yet, I was impressed; she could have killed all the Vulkars here. I knew she could have, she was strong enough to do so, even though she had forgotten the ways of the Force, she still was as strong in combat as she ever was. Yet, something held her back. Instead, she had resorted to stratagem to gain whatever her objective was. What that was I had no idea.

I snorted, "Maybe those swoop gangs will think twice keeping a Jedi prisoner…."

I looked at Revan, her eyes drawing a complete blank, of course, she didn't know me, but I knew her. It had not been long since….that day, since Malak, since I had fought. The memory stirred within me.

The Force drew around us both, and our eyes locked together…..

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

 _I saw her, the woman, now I recognized her from my earlier vision. It was Bastila. She was in combat against a person in flowing dark robes and a mask. My heart beat heavy within my chest. She stood firmly against her opponent and stated, "You cannot win Revan…."_

 _She held her blade ready to strike when suddenly the whole bridge erupted into flames. The figure in robes went down. Bastila going over and apparently staring at the personage, Revan, her eyes in apparent concern._

Whatever I had seen slowly faded away to black. I slumped down heavy, feeling overwhelmed to the ground.

Bastila frowned as she came over to me, "You are tired. You should get some rest. Although I have to say, you're… you're one of the soldiers with the Republic fleet, aren't you? Yes, I'm sure of it. How did you end up here with these swoop gangs?"

I smiled softly, "It's a long story."

"Yes….well we don't have time for it now. We have to get out of here."

I managed to stand up, feeling a bit woozy and Bastila managed to help me to my feet. "My name is Phoenix Star, I came to save you."

She shook her head, "Save me? Why you are even barely able to stand. I hardly doubt you are in any condition to save me at all, you're apparently drunk."

I frowned, "I am not drunk, not drunk at all. I may smell of Tarisian ale, but I am not drunk. Face it I am here, and I've rescued you."

Bastila shook her head, "Well, as far as rescues go this is a pretty poor example. In case you hadn't noticed, I managed to free myself from that neural restraint collar without your help. It's more accurate to say, that you'd be in trouble in your inebriated condition without me."

I groaned, "I don't have time to argue over the fact whether or not I am inebriated or not. The fact is you were still a helpless prisoner till I came along."

"I may have been a prisoner, but a Jedi is never helpless. Maybe you've heard of a little thing called 'the Force'? But I suppose I shouldn't be too hard on you. You did try to save me after all, even if it didn't go quite as planned. So let's get down to business – we're not out of danger yet. If I'm going to figure out a way for us to get off this planet I need to know what kind of resources we can draw on."

Maybe I shouldn't have rescued Bastila after all, she was seriously getting on my nerves. I thought rescuing her was a good thing, but instead, she seemed to be taking all the credit for something I worked my butt off on.

I sighed, "Well Carth Onasi is with me, we're looking for files to convince the Vulkars to abandon Brejik and to join up with the Hidden Beks. Oh and speaking of resources."

I loosened my belt and took Bastila's lightsaber off of it and smiled, "This I believe is yours."

I watched as Bastila took the lightsaber from me. She didn't even say thank you. Okay, that was just plain rude. I coughed a bit and looked a bit angry at her, she then finally said, "Thank you, I must admit, I missed my lightsaber and to know that Carth Onasi is alive! That is good news! Carth is one of the Republic's best soldiers. He's proved himself a hero a dozen times over! And he sent you here to save me? Maybe I misjudged you. Carth wouldn't have sent you if he wasn't confident in your… abilities. Forgive me – despite my Jedi training, I still tend to act a bit rashly sometimes. "

Mission came into the room, "Nix….I found it. What you said is true…..apparently Revan and Brejik were working together. I downloaded it to mine and your datapad.

I noticed Bastila slightly paled a bit at Mission's words as if the name Revan caused her a deep amount of concern and pain.

"Hey….are you alright?"

Bastila nodded, "I am fine, what is this about Revan and Brejik?"

"Well apparently Revan turned Brejik against the Beks. This swoop gang war was all Revan's doing, a ploy to weaken the swoop gangs so that they couldn't be a threat to the Sith."

Bastila nodded, "I see. Well you've done a good job, Phoenix Star. What were your plans with this information to begin with?"

"Well…. _our_ plans were to distribute it among the Vulkars and de-legitimize Brejik's control over the Vulkars and convince them to join up with the Beks, with two unified, swoop gangs, the Sith's control over Taris will be weakened."

Bastila nodded, "I see. Well that is a worthy objective, Phoenix. Admirable really, almost Jedi like in nature. So yes, I will help you with that."

I sighed and shook my head and said sarcastically, "Well I am so glad you approve…."


	21. Chapter 20: Taris: United Together

**Chapter 20: Taris: United Together**

 **~Bastila~**

Much to the complaints of Carth, I took over the mission. Rev….Phoenix seemed okay with it, at least for the moment. The twi'lek, Mission, transmitted Brejik's misdeeds throughout the Vulkar base. What happened to the base was no surprise. Defections, and I encouraged the defectors to go see Gadon and to unite the Vulkars and the Beks together. I was surprised when one of the former Vulkars handed me a part. "Give this to the one called Nix, I heard that she was the one who wanted us to know what Brejik did." I took the part and nodded. "I will make sure she gets it."

However, Phoenix seemed distracted and her lack of focus allowed me to take over the mission without much protest. She seemed listless.

"Is… is something wrong? You seem as if something is troubling you."

She looked at me. "It's….noth…." She paused a moment debating whether or not to say what was bothering her. "Something strange happened when I met you. I...I had a vision."

I frowned a bit. "Of what?"

"Of you. Fighting a dark Jedi. Revan, I guess."

"Hmm….that is strange. Such visions are often a sign of Force sensitivity."

Of course I knew what this meant, what little of Revan's mind that remained was surfacing. However, I would have been able to have monitor Phoenix more closely if we hadn't gotten separated earlier on Taris, so I had no idea how much of Revan's fragmented memories were coming forward. Some of her memories or surface impressions may have surfaced already, and I would have no clue. True we had a bond, but I had to focus more on my captivity with the Vulkars than focus on Revan's fragmented memories resurfacing.

Phoenix grasped my hands looking slightly concerned. "Are you saying….I can use the Force?"

"I… I'm not sure. It may be that you have some connection to the Force. It would not be unheard of. When we first met, your natural talent may have fed off my own Force abilities. It is possible that the Force allowed you to witness one of my more intense memories."

Phoenix sighed. "That might explain a few things…."

I frowned. "Explain what?"

"Well...the fact that I had some really good pazaak hands earlier."

"I see… well gambling is not something one should do against a Jedi."

She gave a forlorn sigh "Now I feel dirty...that poor guy in the cantina kept accusing me of cheating and….well I guess I was, although I didn't mean to."

I patted Phoenix on the back. "Don't feel too bad about it, you didn't know, that's the thing with being Force sensitive and untrained. You often unconsciously use the Force and are unaware you are even using it. "

She muttered a bit. "All the things on the planet to find you, and….I thought I just had really good fortune or luck. Maybe I always knew I was different in someway. When I think about it now, I guess what you're saying makes sense."

I could sense she was still troubled about this and being troubled could also affect me. I had to settle this. I had to at least try and uplift Phoenix's spirits and get her back to her normal mood. Unfortunately, I had no idea what that was, aside from the fact that she seemed to like to play pazzak and drink. I needed to spend time with her and get to know her better and that could prove difficult. I got the impression that Revan...errr Phoenix and I were Klicks apart in personality and what she liked now seemed so very un-Jedi like.

She looked firmly at me. "So….does that mean I could be a Jedi?"

"The Force is complicated; even I with all my training cannot fully understand it yet. This is a matter best left to the wise Masters of the Jedi Council. Once we escape Taris we can seek the guidance of the Council, if you wish. They will understand the significance of your vision… if there is any. However, I think it would be best if we all stayed focused on the task at hand right now. We can't afford any distraction; we need to finish what you started and then get off Taris."

Phoenix nodded and was quiet and I quietly put the swoop part in her hand. "One of the disaffected Vulkars wanted you to have this."

Phoenix's eyes lit up. "Sithspit….I forgot about this, it's a swoop acceleration part. Gadon wanted me to steal it back to use in the big Swoop opener to save you. I thought his plan was a whole load of bantha poodoo and I formulated my own plan. I guess….we better get this to Gadon."

I smiled softly, Phoenix seemed to do better with a task in hand, as already her brooding mood seemed to dissipate.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I didn't know what to think. Me, possibly a Jedi? This was quite a lot to take in. I tried to push all the emotions over my Force sensitivity to the side. I didn't need this right now. I needed to focus on the task at hand. Carth, Mission, and Zaalbar were back at our hideout, resting and recovering. I had pushed them all pretty hard. I needed to rest as well because I was heading for a crash and I knew it. Yet, I couldn't sleep even if I had wanted to, all I could think about was the fact that I was Force sensitive and the fact that I could be a Jedi. It was enough, to keep sleep from my eyes. Bastila went with me to the Bek base, which was overwhelmingly crowded with swoop gang members, some of them held white items in their hands, signifying a truce.

Bastila smiled at me. "See what you've done, Phoenix. You've undid what Darth Revan has done. This is a tremendous thing. If you do become a Jedi, you are on a promising start."

I nodded. "I hope you are right, Bastila. Did I do the right thing, bringing the swoop gangs together?"

She frowned. "How can you question what you've done?"

I shrugged."I don't know, just got a feeling like it might have been a mistake. Can't explain it."

Bastila looked thoughtful. "It might be nothing, it might be something, I wouldn't completely ignore what you're feeling. Yet, even the wisest Jedi Masters can't completely comprehend what the Force is telling them. Can you explain what you are feeling? Maybe I can figure it out."

I sighed. "Well….I've got a feeling like something is wrong, something ominous maybe. I am sorry, I don't know much more."

Bastila nodded. "I see...well….there isn't much we can do, but I advise we get whatever business you have left on Taris done as quickly as possible as well as try to find a way off this planet as fast as we can."

I nodded. "That reminds me, I need to get to the Under city, I had some journals to give to an old man."

Bastila raised an eyebrow and I smiled. "Long story, I decided to help this old man about some place called the Promised Land. He thinks I am some sort of savior or something. Carth thought he was crazy. Me….maybe I saw something about him that….err….that wouldn't be the Force again, would it?"

Bastila shrugged."Perhaps, it is hard to say, Phoenix. Anything else?"

I grinned. "Yea, now that you mentioned it, I have business with a Mandlorian in the dueling circle." I didn't mentioned that it was a death match. I wanted to make sure I had rescued Bastila first before I did something as completely random as risking my life.

Bastila frowned. "A fight in a duel circle, really Phoenix? I would think that something like that would be at the bottom of your priorities."

"You don't know me, Bastila."

"Apparently I don't. Although such actions are unbecoming of even a Jedi initiate."

"I am not a Jedi, Bastila and this Mandlorian has it coming to him."

Bastila shook her head. "I see, so it's a vendetta you seek. Such actions are of the Dark Side."

"Yea, I guess it is if you honestly want to call it that but there's a bounty on his head for killing others in the circle. I found out about it, when I collected a bounty off a murdering assassin. Those people he has killed deserve justice, and justice is a complicated thing. Sometimes it's not exactly light or dark. Murder is murder, but what of the Sith you've killed and Carth has killed or the ones I've killed. That's not exactly not murder. Self defense, yea….maybe, but it's still a life taken. That's not light or dark now, is it?"

I could tell Bastila really didn't want to talk about the morality of action with me and merely shook her head, "Well I cannot force you to do or not to do something, but I wish you would heed my words. If you wish to be a Jedi, these actions do not bode well for your future."

"Space you, Bastila, what are you? My mother?"

Bastila was quiet afterwards as we entered the Bek base.

I walked up to Gadon who seemed to have a smile on his face. "I don't know what you did….but I owe you my gratitude. You've broken up the Vulkars and Brejik has fled for his life. You could have killed him, but you didn't. I am appreciative to you, no matter what Brejik has done, I loved him like a son. As for the future of the Beks, or should I say we are now considering the name Black Beks or Hidden Vulkars, we owe it all to you, Phoenix Star."

I nodded and then dug out of my pack, the swoop accelerator part, "I know this didn't exactly go as planned but here's your part, one of the Vulkars gave it to me as a peace offering."

Gadon took the part. "Thank you. I should mentioned the swoop race is still on, except now it is a celebratory race honoring the peace between the swoop gangs and..."

I frowned. "And…."

"Well since we owe this peace to you, it would mean a lot to both gangs if you would ride in the race. I want you to have an advantage in the race because, you are our peace maker. I should warn you though, that the swoop part might explode on you."

I paled. "What? Ummm I don't think I really want to do this."

Gadon shook his head. "I am concerned about the peace though, if you don't race, the peace you brought about may slowly disintegrate as the racers get very possessive about their wins and if a former Vulkar or even a Bek wins the race, it may bring a new form of animosity and a new gang war. This is why I believe you should race since you represent neither side and a win from you will signify a new era of peace."

"It sounds like I don't have much of a choice then, alright, I'll race but I am not really a swoop racer though."

"Well I've been around for awhile and I can tell you have the look and the instincts of a racer. The race is tomorrow. I would suggest you get some rest. "

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I stayed with Phoenix that night in the Bek base. She troubled me. Her actions were troubling to say the least. She could save lives in one instance and yet so willingly decide to take others. I held hope that Revan would be redeemed in the eyes of not just the order but in my eyes as well.

Phoenix seemed to be struggling to sleep and I sighed. "Phoenix, you need to sleep. When was the last time you slept?"

She shrugged as she lay in a bunk. "Can't remember. We set out to save you, and…..everything is blurring together to be truthful. I remember taking a hit of stims to keep going and..."

I nodded. "You may still have stims in your system making it hard for you to sleep. If you want, I could use the Force to clear them out."

"It's more than stims, Bastila, Although that maybe part of the problem. Can we talk?"

I nodded. "What do you wish to talk about?"

"I don't know, maybe the fact that I am Force sensitive. I've tried to….well not think about it but I can't."

"I see. Well you have done quite a lot, Phoenix. You managed to avoid detection by the Sith and under incredible odds managed to find me, united the Beks and the Vulkars, plus the fact you are racing in the swoop race tomorrow. That's quite an impressive resume, if you ask me."

She sighed. "Yea, but it wasn't just me. I had help I had Carth, Mission, Zaalbar…."

"Your modesty is admirable. But though others helped, you were the catalyst for these events. When you were chosen to join this mission, I doubt any of us expected this much from you. A Jedi could have done such things, of course. But only by drawing heavily upon the Force."

Phoenix sat up on her bed. "Are you trying to say I can control the Force?"

"The Force is in all of us, though for most people it is a barely measurable whisper. But there are some individuals outside the Jedi Order that we considered 'Force Sensitive'. It is obvious to me that the Force has been working through you. There is no other explanation for your great success, though I am not certain what to make of this discovery. Perhaps if you weren't –well, if you were younger the Jedi might take you for training. But as it is…

"And…."

"I'm sorry: I've overstepped my authority. I'm speaking of things that are best left to the Jedi Council. For now let's just accept the fact that you are… gifted."

Phoenix sighed. "You know that didn't really help me. I am more troubled than ever by what you're saying, I guess, it's unsettling to know this. And if I was born with this sensitivity, why didn't the Jedi accept me for training when I was younger?"

I sighed. "You were born in the Outer Rim, outside of the Republic, correct?"

Phoenix nodded and I added. "The Jedi rarely go out to the Outer Rim, and out of the Republic to find Force sensitives for training. I suppose if you had been born on a Republic controlled planet you would have been taken for training earlier in your life. And I've spoken enough, Phoenix. These matters are best left in the hands of the council. Now if you will let me….let me help you sleep. You will collapse if you don't get proper sleep."

"Alright…..so how does this work?"

"Lay down and breath…."

I watched as Phoenix did what she was told and I then took my hands and quietly rubbed her temples and called upon the Force and added a bit of compulsion behind it and compelled Phoenix to sleep. Her body was tired and the suggestion flowed through her body without any sort of resistance and her body uncoiled and relaxed. The next thing I heard was her snoring away.

I sighed. "Good night Revan." I sat down beside her bed and entered a meditative stance and posture, letting the Force guide me through my rest.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The next morning, Gadon and his techs took me to the swoop track. Bastila insisted in coming with me, something about that she sensed that the Force needed her to be there with me. I got the impression that she wanted to get to know me a little bit better. I had wished that our conversation, the other day about Bendack Starkiller had went better. Somehow I felt like I wanted Bastila's approval and favor, I couldn't explain why I wanted it. It was like, a child or student wanting the approval of a parent or a teacher. Seriously that was messed up thinking. I had to be at least ten or twelve years older than she was, unless….I had some sort of fixation on her. Let's face it, she was kind of cute despite her brisk and sometimes overbearing manner. It probably didn't help that she had pointed out that I was Force sensitive and now I suddenly desired overwhelmingly, despite any odds of being told that I was too old for training, that I wanted to be a Jedi. Since I didn't know what a Jedi was suppose to be like, I wanted to follow her every whim and example. Yet, I had a feeling that if I followed her manner and style I'd probably be disappointed. Yep, I decided, that I had to be messed up in the head, wanting to become like Bastila.

The mechanic for the Beks spoke with me, an Ithorian, his low rumbling voice spoke. "So you're the one who's going to ride this swoop bike, eh? Don't worry – I've been working on the accelerator and stability won't be a problem. I hope."

I frowned. "What do you mean you hope?"

"Normally a rider can run as many heats as they want, but I don't know how long the prototype accelerator on your swoop will hold up. No more than four or five races, I'd guess. So make your runs count."

"Wonderful…."

Bastila looked at me. "Relax, Phoenix. You'll be fine. You are gifted after all, but you need to win the race as a neutral party to keep the peace between the Vulkars and the Beks. If any of the others win, it may very well end the peace you sought to establish. May the Force be with you."

I sighed and went over to the announcer and mentioned I wished to run one of my heats. He nodded and I got into the swoop bike. Despite Bastila wanting me to relax I felt keyed up. I put my hands on the controls of the bike and felt them.

I suddenly heard Bastila's voice rumbling in my head, it shocked me for a moment but then I got use to it.

 _::Relax Phoenix and just let your body flow naturally. Don't forget to breath and if you can….perhaps you will feel the Force. I can't train you, but I can give you pointers to help you perhaps feel the Force more than you usually do.::_

I shrugged, I couldn't reply to Bastila's mental advice but it was nice to feel that she was trying to help me out as best as she could.

The clock suddenly chimed down and I pushed down on the controls and I felt the rush of air nearly pull me out of the seat as the swoop bike and I went down the track. Wow….this felt intense. The landscape of the Lower City went speeding past me. My hands pushed down on the gears to get past the acceleration pads which made my chest and heart nearly come up. I suddenly laughed, the nervous energy flowed through my body and I felt molded into the bike, I could hear and feel the ticks of the power couplings, I could feel the heat of the bike rush through me, the wind blowing my short hair. I felt like I could stay on this track forever. In it's own way, I was relaxed and peaceful despite the whole chaotic experience as I rolled over acceleration pads. I finally came to the end of the track and I stopped the bike. My hair was wild and all fussed up as I came back to the garage.

I gave a wild whoop and all the biker gangs cheered for me and the announcer announced. "Phoenix Star has the lead…..she has a time of 00:37:25.

I gave a formal bow and Bastila shook her head at me, okay so I probably wasn't humble and that wasn't a Jedi trait, but I bet Bastila felt the same feeling of personal satisfaction and achievement when she saved the Republic using her battle meditation.

Meanwhile we waited for the other heats to be run. I drunk a cup of caff. I frowned, as suddenly the announcer announced that my time had been beaten. I sighed, I would be racing yet again it seemed. I went into my bike and once again speed down the track. Finishing the heat, I was told my speed was now 00:36:02 and that no one could beat that. It was all a matter of time for them to announce that I was the winner of the race.

After all the heats were finished, Bastila looked at me with concern as coming in slowly to the swoop deck was Brejik. Wait a minute hadn't he fled for his life? He held a weapon in his hand and with him were what appeared to be some of the same people I saw the other night in the base. Apparently not all the Vulkars felt that being allied with the Sith was a bad thing. This was not going to end well. My hand reached for my Echani double blade I had but Bastila put a hand on my shoulder. "Hold on Phoenix, this might end peacefully."

I snorted. "Yea, well I am not holding my breath. He's probably madder than a spice addict cut off from his fix. After all we stole his gang from him."

I reached for my blade anyway despite Bastila's caution about not rushing into combat.

Brejik hissed." Beks, Vulkars. I am not going to walk away without a fight. The winner of this race, is a fraud. She claims to be racing for peace but she had an unfair advantage. She won using a swoop bike accelerator prototype, a part that belonged to the Vulkars, which I had before she stole it. She claims I am a traitor to the Vulkars but what she's done is even worse. She's made this peace a lie and I won't stand for it."

I glared firmly. "You're allied with the Sith, Brejik. You've used this gang war as a way to fuel your quest for power. How many Beks and how many Vulkars died because of your mad desire for power? It's over. Your reign is over. Your Vulkars now know the truth that you would ally yourself with enemies that don't even care about them or Taris. The Sith would rather slaughter you and all the gangs in the Lower City. Whether you know it or not, your desire for power has only weakened yourself and your Vulkars. If you wish to fight me, then fight me. However, I do not believe I stand alone and you know this, that's why you've brought others with you."

Bastila smiled at me and quietly intoned. "Well said, Phoenix. Well said."

She quietly reached for her lightsaber and Brejik yelled out. "Vulkars that are loyal to me attack!"

I heard the snap hiss of Bastila's lightaber and a fight ensued. Beks and Vulkars fought, some of them fought against Brejik, others fought with Brejik and against me and the other Beks. I hoped this didn't end the peace. Brejik went right for me, he was mad and angry. His blows were sloppy and emotive. He was lashing out in anger. It was not unlike how I was when I first arrived on Taris and I raged against the Sith soldier. Such emotional strikes meant that I could control how he threw his blows. he was making this fight personal, although I couldn't honestly blame him. I had taken away his power base and he wanted me dead.

We fought for several minutes. I toyed with him. I jumped away from his strikes. He lunged and struck blows and I blocked his blows easily. I grinned. "Gee Brejik you are a slow pathetic dewback." He growled and suddenly his blade lashed out and sliced a deep gash into my arm. I hissed in pain but the pain only sharpened my resolve against him and I fought harder despite the wound. "Oooh I struck a nerve." I said in a self assured cocky manner. It seemed to anger Brejik even more that I was teasing him. He glared at me. "Damn you…..you and your jibes….you remind me of…Rev..." Before he could finish his remark, my blade struck a fatal wound to his side. His face drained of blood and he fell to the ground and didn't move.

Bastila's blade danced around making what looked like a yellow dance of death that brought down any that decided to harm her. I joined her and it felt like we were in unison together, her blade and mine sweeping down together against those that were trying to break the peace. Yellow duel blade and Echani duel blade swung together and then I grinned and switched it up. Her blade going down and mine going upward so whatever blows she missed I ended up catching on the next rotation of our blades. We were dangerous and we were deadly. Finally it was quiet, the dead around us and I sighed. "I hope…..I hope the peace wasn't broken Bastila."

She nodded. "Indeed, I hope so as well. Come on we better get out of here. We can check with Gadon later on this, you are wounded and need to be tended to."

I shrugged. "It's just a scratch, Bastila. I'll be fine."

She nodded. "Still I would feel better for you if we got a medpack on that scratch of yours."

I nodded and she extended her hand towards mine. I smiled, I had a feeling that together we were going to be a powerful pair and I took her hand and we walked side by side hand in hand together.


	22. Ch 21: Taris: On the Verge of Darkness

**Chapter 21: Taris: On the Verge of Darkness**

 **~Malak~**

As Brejik opened his eyes in a holding cell, the first thing he noticed was me. He suddenly stammered. "I am loyal to you Lord Malak. I swear."

"You _were_ loyal to Revan. Not to me, Brejik. Apparently you thought that any deals you made to Revan were broken with his death. I do not know what Revan saw in you, but apparently more than I ever did. I am the Dark Lord now, not Revan and it has come to my attention that you have been hiding a Jedi from me."

"I swear….I didn't know she was a Jedi, Lord Malak. I swear. She didn't have a lightsaber on her, Lord Malak. I thought she was a Republic officer."

"Then you should know that any Republic officers are my prisoners, Brejik, not property of your pitiful little gang. You are only alive because you are the only tie to Bastila I have. I have witnesses that saw your fight and saw a female Jedi participate in it. Tell me, everything you know, who she was with, any allies or those who may have allied with her."

Brejik said firmly. "Only if you guarantee my life, Lord Malak."

I glared at Brejik. "You are in no position to bargain for anything."

I let the Force fill me and the lighting left my hands, burning and stinging Brejik till he screamed. "You will wish for death after I am finished with you."

I poured another salvo of lighting into him, he was weak, from the fight he went through earlier, and he collapsed in a heap. I motioned for medics who took him and placed him in a kolto tank.

 **A few hours later….**

Brejik opened his eyes once again. I could sense he was awake, and I was turned away from him. "So you are awake yet again, Brejik. Did you know that Revan came up with this technique? I always thought it was a waste of kolto but….I must admit that perhaps my old master was wiser than I realized to bring someone to the brink of death, and then bring them back, and kill them over and over again. How long do you think you can last Brejik before your mind inevitably cracks? Perhaps the third time or maybe the fifty-first time, to taste death and then have it denied to you over and over again."

Brejik sighed. "Alright…. the Jedi had help. A woman named Nix was the leader, along with a man named Nasi. At least that was the names that the woman, named Nix, gave me. They had help from a twi'lek named Mission Vao and a wookiee named Zaalbar. That's all I know, Lord Malak, I swear. They helped to free her, and they uncovered the relationship I had with….your old Master."

"I see….no doubt they were Republic officers. Thank you, Brejik you have been most helpful. Now I suppose it is time I let you go."

He looked relieved till I ignited my lightsaber, its blade flickered and glowed red in the dim room and I slowly plunged it into his chest….

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"I am telling you Bastila. You can't go walking across the streets of Taris. It's not safe. You need a disguise of some sort." I stated firmly

"I can use the Force to mask my appearance; it's what I was doing earlier."

Carth backed me up and stated. "Yea, that's all fine and good till you run into Dark Jedi or someone trained to resist the Force."

I nodded. "Repub….Carth is right, Bastila. I may be "gifted" as you say, but you are going to have to rely on something that a non-Force user or untrained user does to get the same results. I say, we cut your hair a little, get some Tarisian noble clothing and have you look like a young man. They are looking for a female Jedi, not a man. We can then disguise ourselves as your attendants."

Bastila paled as if she was alarmed that I suggested that she disguise herself as a Tarisian nobleman. "I will certainly not do that. You may be comfortable disguising yourself as a man, Phoenix but I refuse to do that."

I threw up my hands in frustration. "Damn it Bastila, Why do you have to be so stubborn? I have had it. I am going out. You try and talk some sense into her, Republic. I need some fresh air; this hideout is getting too crowded. I need to think some plus I need to finish some business around the cities as well."

Mission perked up. "Can Zaalbar and I come with you, Nix?"

I looked thoughtful for a moment. "Yea…." I frowned a moment. "You know what, I am beginning to think our luck might be drawing to a close. We don't know how our fight with the gangs was reported. I don't trust that one of the Vulkars or the Beks didn't say something. Bastila was seen fighting with a lightsaber, you don't see lightsabers all the time, except with Jedi or Sith. I think it might be for the best that you and Zaalbar stay put. You know how the upper city is about aliens, all we need is for a human to say something about you two, which ends up drawing attention to ourselves and then have the Sith come knocking on our door."

Mission sighed. "Yea, I suppose you're right, Nix. It's just that Zaalbar and I are getting kind of restless, that's all."

I nodded. "I understand. We'll see if we can get some disguises for you as well. Not sure what I can do for Zaalbar though. It's kind of hard to hide a wookiee."

Carth shook his head. "Is it wise for you to go out on your own, Phoenix? If you think our luck is changing then is it smart for you to go walking around Taris?"

I smiled. "Relax Republic, I am a smuggler. I can be unobtrusive as I want to be plus I am at least willing to disguise myself as anything I wish, be it man, woman, alien. Unlike some people around here!"

Bastila sighed. "Fine…..Phoenix, you've made your point. But all I ask is please don't cut my hair. My Padawan braid is important to me."

"I thought Jedi weren't supposed to be vain."

"It's not vanity, Phoenix. It's a symbol of my connection with the Jedi and the Force."

"Alright….I won't ask you to violate some sort of religious tradition, although having it might also put us at risk, but I'll think of something on how to hide that as well."

"Come on Republic, let's go get some clothing for Bastila and ourselves. Plus, I have some things I need to finish up around the Cities as well."

Carth nodded and we both exited the apartment. I looked at Carth. "Tell me Republic, is Bastila always like this?"

He sighed. "Unfortunately, yes. She's been that way since her battle meditation manifested itself and helped the Republic won a few key victories."

I shook my head. "In other words, she's stuck on herself. You know I hate to say it, but they say pride comes before a fall."

Carth nodded. "Yea, Phoenix and you're not exactly not full of pride either."

I held up my hands. "Yea, well at least I know I am incorrigible, and I revel in it some too." I said with a grin and a light chuckle. I then sighed. "I don't think…." I paused. "I don't think Bastila realizes it or if she does she doesn't realize it till after the fact."

"You know, Phoenix, we probably shouldn't be talking about Bastila like this."

"Fair enough, I would hate to have Bastila talk about me behind my back. So I won't bring it up anymore. I was just curious, that's all."

Carth nodded. "So what's this business in the cities entail?"

"I promised Rukil to tell him the whereabouts of his apprentice, and these journals we found in the sewers, heal whatever outcasts that might have the rakghoul virus, give Zelka Forn the samples of the serum for the rakghoul virus, I need to see how things settled with Gadon and the Beks, and I have a bounty I need to collect on."

Carth nodded and we began to leave the apartments when a twi'lek approached us. He nodded at me. "You there – human. You are the rider who won the great swoop race in the Lower City, yes?"

I looked at Carth and I decided it would be wise to deny any connection with the race. "You must have me confused with someone else."

"No, human. I don't think so. I saw the swoop race: you were there. You posted the best time. You are the one I was sent to find. "

I held my weapon firmly and Carth did the same, if this was a Sith agent, it could end badly. "And what do you want with me?"

"Me? I want nothing. I am only a runner. I work for the man who hired me."

"I see….and who hired you?"

"I have a message from Canderous Ordo. He says to meet him in the cantina."

"Canderous…..Canderous…." I pondered the name. "Who is that?"

"He is a Mandalorian that works with Davrik. He said you met him in the Under City."

"Ahh, muscle man. Yea, I remember him."

The twi'lek nodded." Yes, that's the one. Given his connections, you can see why it would be wise to attend this meeting. He said he had an offer you couldn't refuse. Given his connections, you can see why it would be foolish to ignore his request. Do not wait too long to see him, human. Mandalorians are not known for their patience."

I nodded. "Very well…."

The twi'lek left and I looked at Carth. "What do you suppose that is all about?"

He shrugged. "No idea, Phoenix."

"So….let's add that to our string of things we have to finish before we leave this pit of a planet."

* * *

We handed Zelka Forn the samples of the rakghoul serum I sighed. "Here Zelka, someone told me that you were looking for this and it's the least I could do after you helped Carth."

"How did you get this? No, wait… I don't really want to know. Can… can I see it? The serum, I mean? I need to see if there is enough for me to analyze it so I can start producing it in mass quantities. "

"Well just let me keep a few for myself to help heal those in the Under City."

"Of course…."

I handed him the serum minus a few extra that I needed to help the Under City residents.

He looked at the serum I had given him. "Hmmm… let me see… yes, this is it! A cure for the rakghoul disease! With this sample I can make enough serum for everyone!"

'That's great news, Zelka."

He sighed."I really ought to give you something for this."

I shook my head. "Really Zelka, that's not necessary."

He went over to his table and he brought over some med packs and some credits. "Still you probably went to a lot of effort to get it. Take it, I insist."

I nodded and took the med packs and credits from Zelka.

Carth smiled at me as we left Zelka's clinic. "You impress me Phoenix, your generosity and doing that without thought of reward."

"Well Carth, I remember having the rakghoul virus, just briefly. I don't want anyone else to go through that, ever."

* * *

We stepped inside the Bek Base. I was sad to find that Gadon was nowhere to be found. Instead I found Zaerdra.

"On behalf of Gadon, I want to offer the thanks of all the Hidden Beks. You rode like a true champion in the swoop race. I'm sorry Gadon can't be here to thank you in person, but he has retired to the safety of his private chambers. I'm afraid he's grieving over Brejik's death."

I sighed. "I am so sorry, Zaerdra…..I tried to do this without killing Brejik. But…."

"Brejik violated the customs and traditions of Taris. He dishonored himself. He got what he deserved – even Gadon has to realize that. Even so, I think Gadon hoped that somehow Brejik could be made to realize the error of his ways. Despite everything he had done, Gadon probably would have forgiven him."

"This all seems so senseless. Anyway, I've come to ask….the peace?"

Zaerdra sighed. "With Brejik's death the Vulkars are thrown into a confusion as whether or not to support the peace or support Brejik's position."

I sighed. "I see…so it seems that my efforts were more than likely in vain."

Zaerdra shook her head. "It's better than it was, Phoenix Star. Perhaps in time, we will be able to form a proper resistance against the Sith."

I nodded. "Then I suppose my efforts weren't completely fruitless. Goodbye Zaerdra, May the Force be with you and the Beks."

I smiled wanly at Carth. "Come on Republic, let's get those journals to Rukil. And help heal the outcasts infected with the rakghoul virus."

* * *

As we walked to the Under City, Carth seemed to look like he had something to say.

"Hey Republic, what's eating ya?"

Carth sighed. "You said that Bastila called you gifted what's that about?"

I sighed. "I don't really want to have this conversation, Republic, but….since we've been through a lot together….I'll try and talk about it."

I paused trying to gather my thoughts. "Let's see, how should I say this? Apparently I have a connection to the Force and….well this whole mission, whether I knew it or not. I've been drawing on it."

Carth took that in and he screwed up his face as if he was taking this all in and he got that look I had come to recognize as, trust no one, question everything. I felt like we had come so far and this only drew him back.

"Damn it….I knew I shouldn't have said anything to you, here we go again, you and the damn conspiracy theories."

"Well you have to admit that it's convenient that you happen to have a connection to the Force, survived the crash of the Endar Spire, and helped to rescue Bastila. I suppose the next thing the Jedi will want to do is train you to be a Jedi."

"Bastila says that might not even happen. I am too old. But I have to admit….."

"Admit what, Phoenix?"

"Well if…." I sighed. "I want to be a Jedi, Carth."

"And you're the one that said you didn't want any complications in your life or as you so eloquently put it, boxed in. So you'll accept the Jedi in your life but not the Republic military, what gives?"

"I can't explain that Carth. I just can't. It's complicated."

"I am not a complicated guy, Phoenix. Try…."

"What….try and explain what I feel! I really shouldn't have to but….because, well because I like you, and….well…" I suddenly turned a deep shade of red, because I didn't want to admit what I felt for Carth.

"Damn it. I am not going to explain how I feel about you, either! One thing at a time, Republic. Okay….something is drawing me towards it, like a coiled spring. I feel pulled, like…." I sighed. "Damn it, now I have to sound like a Jedi to explain this. Like it's my destiny, something is tugging at me, Carth, and if I don't…." I groaned."I feel like I'll be torn into agonizing bits. I have to be a Jedi, it's calling to me, Carth. I don't know what I'll do if…..well if it doesn't happen."

Carth sighed and shook his head. "You're a complicated woman, Phoenix."

"Tell me something I don't know. Can we stop talking about this? I'd just as soon as not focus about this because to tell you the truth, I wish I didn't feel this way and I wish I didn't have the Force in my life because I've got a feeling my life is going to be a lot harder from now on because of it, or because I know I have it."

Carth nodded. "Okay and I appreciate you opening up to me about this, I realize that this must be hard for you to talk about and well….that means a lot to me."

"Thanks, Republic."

 **~0o0~**

I pulled out three journals as we entered the Under City. I looked them over again closely making sure the information was all there and correct. I went over to Rukil and sighed. "I found your apprentice, Rukil, she's dead. But I did find her journal."

"it is as I feared, then. She joins the list of those who have given their lives in the service of our cause. But though I am saddened by this news, there is yet hope. By finding my apprentice you have proved yourself worthy, up-worlder. You are to be the beacon on our path to salvation. You will guide us to the Promised Land!"

"I….ummm..I think you have me confused with someone else."

"You are marked, up-worlder – even my dim old eyes can see the mantle of destiny that cloaks you. Perhaps old Rukil knows you better than you know yourself. I am old – I have lived a hundred years in the Under City, cast down into the darkness. I know the legends and history of our people – and now you must learn it, too.

More about destiny, what was this guy some sort of Jedi as well? I sighed. "I wish I knew my own destiny, old man. At this point in time, I feel lost. But I suppose it can't hurt to know your people's past and their legends."

Rukil smiled softly. "Perhaps in helping us, your destiny will become clearer."

"Maybe, but I am not holding my breath on that."

Rukil then spoke. "The great city of Taris covers the entire surface of this planet. There is no land to grow food. Kelp harvests and the creatures of the sea are our only food source. A century ago rising levels of toxic pollution poisoned the oceans and famine swept the planet. The rich hoarded food for their own use, and the poor were left to starve and die. "

Carth interjected, "From what I've seen of Taris, it doesn't look like much has changed. Except for the Upper City, people here are just as bad off as the poor in your little history."

Rukill coughed. "But the poor rose up against this tyranny and civil war engulfed the planet. Millions died in the fighting and huge sections of Taris were destroyed or abandoned. The rebellion was crushed in the end, thousands were taken prisoner. The jails could not hold them all, and so the practice of banishing all prisoners to the Under City was born."

"And what part do I have to play in this?"

"Many brave men and women were banished here to the Under City for their part in the rebellion. People like my father and grandfather were cast down, along with their families. Now we live a dark existence beneath the streets of Taris, a life devoid of all hope but one: the Promised Land. And you will be the one to show us the way to get there."

"Lead you? How? I have no idea where this Promise land is that you speak of, Rukil."

"Legends tell of a self-sufficient colony founded just before the famine and lost during the civil war; a paradise beneath the Under City where droid servants tend to every need. For many years I searched for the Promised Land, just as my grandfather and father did before me. When I became old and gray my apprentice continued the search on my behalf."

Carth sighed. "That sounds like a myth to me, something to give hope, even if it is false hope."

Rukill sighed. "You are jaded, up-worlder."

I laughed a bit. "Don't mind, Carth, Rukil. He's a complicated guy upstairs, but he's alright."

"I have collected many clues hinting at its location; the journal of my apprentice provides yet more information. But still there are too many pieces missing from this puzzle. But I know my father and grandfather each had journals where they recorded their own discoveries. Perhaps with their journals I could at last uncover its hidden location. "

I smiled. "Oh these journals, I found them as well."

I handed them to Rukil who looked at me with a look of amazement. "Can it be true? Is it possible that at long last the dream of my father and grandfather before him will be fulfilled? I... I can hardly bear to look. Hmmm... yes. Yes! Of course! Now I understand – it all makes sense! Now I see why the Promised Land has been so hard to find! It is so obvious! You have done a great thing, up-worlder – a selfless act that will bring great joy to all the people of this village! I must take this to Gendar right away!"

Rukil struggled to walk, but I offered him my arm and together we walked over to Gendar. I needed to talk to him as well.

"Rukil and the up-worlder, what is this about? Tell me you haven't been pestering this poor up-worlder woman about your legends and fables."

"You may not think these are fables after you see what I have brought you, Gendar! Look at these journals!"

Gendar looked them over. "What... no. It can't be! Are these real, Rukil? Is this information accurate?"

"I swear to you everything in these journals is true, Gendar. The Promised Land – I told you I would find it!"

Gendar nodded. "The entrance is far from here, Rukil. It will take us weeks to get there... perhaps even months. And we will have to cross many rakghoul-infested areas."

I added. "About that, here…..take this rakghoul serum. Maybe your healer will be able to use it to make more serum that way your journey won't be so difficult. Use it also to heal those that need to be healed so they can also come on your journey." I handed Gendar the rakghoul serum.

Gendar looked at me amazed. "Thank you up-worlder. You truly amaze me; this will help out a lot."

Rukil nodded. "I do not deny the journey will be hard, Gendar. But surely it is better than the miserable life we have here! "

"Wise words, Rukil. Our supplies are high right now – we could leave by nightfall! I will tell the others to prepare for the journey."

Rukil turned to me, his spirits lifted; his body did not seem as old as it once did. "Thank you once again, up-worlder. I will say a final goodbye, for where we are going I fear you cannot come. The journey to the Promised Land is long and arduous. "

I looked at the old man; I wanted to help him out as best as I could and help his people make it. Forget the Jedi, this man could obviously use my help, "Maybe I should come with you. I could help you on the journey."

He sadly shook his head. "No, up-worlder, I cannot ask that. The journey will take many, many weeks. And those who make the journey cannot return – that was the final secret of the Promised Land. When the colony was created it was designed so that people could enter willingly, but they could never leave again. This was to ensure secrecy on the project. We must part ways here, up-worlder. I sense your destiny is yet to be chosen, but the destiny of my people is at the end of the long journey ahead of us."

I nodded. "Good bye Rukil, may the Force be with you and your people."

I watched as Rukil wandered off and I looked at Carth. "I hope they make it alright. Can't help but feel they could really use my help."

Carth nodded. "You've given them hope, Phoenix. I've got the feeling that it's been a long time since anyone on Taris has had that."

I nodded. "Let's go see Canderous. I bet knowing that Mandalorian, he's probably peeved off that I've kept him waiting. But..." I grinned. "I rather enjoy making people wait. It makes whatever he's offering better."

* * *

As I entered the cantina, I saw Canderous. He snorted. "About time you showed up."

I grinned. "Yea, well better late than never. So what is this about?"

"My name's Canderous Ordo. I work for Davik Kang and the Exchange; the hours aren't great, but they promised me a fortune to work for them and I have nothing better to do. Mandalorian mercs like me are in high demand. But lately Davik hasn't been paying me what he promised. I don't like getting cheated, so I figure it's time for me to break the Sith quarantine and get off this backwater planet. I've got a plan to escape Taris, but I can't do it alone. I need someone I know can get the job done to help me. That's where you come in."

I perked up. "Okay….and what can I do to help you out?"

Carth frowned and said. "Careful. Mercs like this haven't a lick of conscience… they'll betray you in a heartbeat. This could be a trap."

Canderous turned toward Carth. "I ain't talking to you. I'm talking to your friend, aren't I?"

"Carth...let's hear him out."

"I saw you win that swoop race, and I started thinking. Anyone crazy enough to race like that is probably crazy enough to break into the Sith military base. I need someone to steal the Sith launch codes from the base. Without those codes any ship leaving the atmosphere will be disintegrated by the Sith fleet's automated defense guns."

"And….so what has this to do with me?"

"Here's the deal: you bring me those launch codes and I can provide the vehicle to get off the planet – Davik's flagship, the _Ebon Hawk_!"

I raised an eyebrow. "How are you going to manage that?"

"Uh-uh. Not yet. First, you bring me the launch codes. Then I'll tell you the rest of my plan."

I rolled my eyes. "Yea….listen here Canderous. You want my help; well it comes with a price as well. See, I figure since you're a Mandalorian. I need your help with something. You know that Bendak Starkiller."

"Yea I know him, I can't stand his guts. He tries to live out the glories of the old days with his death matches when he should be taking worlds."

I smiled. "Here's the thing, there's a bounty on his head that I want to collect. No doubt he'll claim the safety of the Cantina and he wants to fight me anyway in a death match. Anyway, here's where you come in. I need you to help me."

Canderous snorted. "I am not going to help you claim some bounty."

"Then you're out of luck."

Canderous frowned. "Damn you woman, you drive a hard bargain. Alright, what is it you need help with."

"Can you teach me your combat techniques with a blaster rifle? I am afraid I am a bit lacking when it comes to the finer points of blaster based combat."

Canderous nodded. "Yea, I can help you with that, although it surprises me why a Republic grunt, and yea I know you're Republic loyalists, thanks to Mr. I-don't-trust-mercs. Tell me why you wants to learn Mandalorian techniques?"

"I need an edge on my opponent. Plus, only an idiot would go into a death match not prepared."

"Fair enough…."


	23. Chapter 22: Taris: Mandalorian Duel

**Chapter 22: Taris: Mandalorian Duel**

 **~Bastila~**

"I really wish, she had told me something before she tied our fates to a Mandalorian mercanary, Carth."

Carth shrugged. "I am sorry, Bastila, but Phoenix is a headstrong woman. When she takes a mind to something, good luck trying to talk her out of it."

"I know. More than you realize, Carth."

I turned around, modeling the manish looking clothing I now wore. Phoenix had done up my hair, with more than one braid, she figured that if I had to have a padawan braid, she'd at least put another couple of similar braids for good measure. She even provided me with a mustache which sat glued to my lip with some synthetic glue. I had no idea what fascination Phoenix held with having me dress up like a Tarisian nobleman, course considering who Phoenix had once been the concept may have not been too farfetched. It still made me wonder why Revan had gone around claiming herself as a man.

We all wear masks, she or rather Revan had said. So here I was on Taris, with the reprogrammed Revan, wearing the equivalent of a mask, a disguise. So even with the disguise, it made me wonder, was the idea Phoenix's idea or Revan's idea or maybe an amalgam of both. I really needed to stop thinking of Phoenix as Revan. Revan was dead, and Phoenix only carried her face, at least I hoped for Phoenix that was the case.

"She's still doing that stupid death match, isn't she?"

Carth nodded. "Yep. She says it's to claim a bounty."

"I don't believe that, Carth. There's a reason much deeper as to why she's doing it aside from the bounty. The bounty maybe the motivation but...she's using it to hide another reason for it."

Carth raised an eyebrow. "How can you tell what Phoenix is thinking or what her motivation is? Are you spying on her through the Force?"

"That is none of your concern, Carth." It wasn't as if I could tell him I was bonded to Phoenix and I could feel her through that bond.

"So what is my concern? It seems to me that you are manipulating her in some form or fashion. She told me that she felt pulled in some way to be a Jedi. That doesn't sound like the Phoenix I know. The Phoenix I was talking to earlier before she met you, said she wanted to live a life free of any sort of attachments to anyone. Now with you around, she said if she doesn't become a Jedi, she feels like she'll be torn apart inside. Care to explain that?"

Manipulated. Carth had no idea, we, the Jedi had no choice on this. Yet, I could tell him nothing. I sighed. "I only explained to Phoenix her possible potential. It sounds to me that it is possible that Phoenix is finally maturing as an individual. She realizes that the universe is a lot bigger than it was for her in the past. Torn apart, are those your words or hers?"

Carth paused. "Well I may have not used her exact words but I know she was worried if she didn't become a Jedi."

"Which is up to the Jedi Masters in the end. Yet….I suppose that feeling of being torn or agonizing over it, maybe her physical connection to the Force slowly manifesting itself and her becoming aware of it. I will do all that I can to help her become a Jedi, but in the end it is up to the masters."

Carth shook his head. "Alright let's say I buy what you are saying, but answer me this, why are you so concerned about her to spy on her mind with the Force?"

"Carth, she has a very strong connection to the Force. She could be an instrument for the light or….the Dark. Now answer me this, do you honestly want Phoenix to be turned to the Dark side, to become the very thing that we both loath and fear?"

"She hasn't shown one iota of interest in that, Bastila."

"Neither have I, Carth. But the Dark side is very tempting. Even if Phoenix doesn't become a Jedi, it is my duty as a Jedi to keep her from such a path or the Sith may very well have another servant."

Carth looked contemplative for a moment. "Well he did call her a coward for not fighting him earlier."

I sighed. "I see. I need to talk to her, before….well before she throws her life away needlessly. Where is she anyway?"

"She's in the dueling circle, practicing with that Mandalorian merc, Canderous. Apparently she convinced the hutt that runs the circle that she was going up against Bendak Starkiller and she needed the circle to practice in. She arranged some sort of deal with Canderous that if he helps her hone her blaster rifle skills and helps her collect that bounty that he will arrange a way for us to get off this planet."

I shook my head. "So our future off this planet is bound up with her and some quest for revenge. We need to put a stop to this, Carth."

Carth shrugged. "That's up to you, Bastila. I am staying out of it. Since you fancy yourself some sort of mentor to her, feel free. However, I tell you once that woman has made up her mind, talking her out of it is like trying to tell a rancor to go without a meal."

"Unbelievable. I can't believe you won't take any action on this, Carth Onasi."

Carth laughed lightly."I am just not that stupid to get involved in the affairs of two women, that's all. Particularly when both are headstrong and stubborn."

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

For a swoop bike champion this girl's blaster rifle skills left a lot to be desired. "You are a sorry excuse for a rifleman, Phoenix. Did you ever learn how to fire a blaster or a blaster rifle in the first place?"

Phoenix sighed. "Yea, enough to know I stink at it. Yet, I am determined to make my weakness a strength, particularly for this duel."

I laughed. "I can see why you'd want to seek someone out to improve your skills."

I handed her one of my rifles. "Now lean into the blaster rifle and line up your target. See that laser scope on your rifle…."

She nodded and looked through the scope and lined up the target. "Of course in a duel, your opponent will be faster targeting you. But take your time, Phoenix, I've never worked with someone who seems to be like a child when it comes to a blaster rifle."

She snorted. "Yea, take my time and have someone blow me away. I am much better with a melee weapon but I know I have to do this, Canderous. A weakness like this could kill me."

I nodded. "It takes a true warrior to admit to a weakness and an even better warrior to seek out a way to improve themselves."

She aimed her weapon when suddenly a young man, who looked like a Tarisian noble, came in front of the target. Phoenix lowered the weapon and started cursing. "Damn it Bastila, get out of the way."

I frowned, Bastila? Wasn't that the name of the Jedi that Darth Malak was going after?

The man put his hands on his hips and spoke in a very effeminate voice. "I will not, not till you give up this foolish pursuit."

Phoenix shrugged nonchalantly. "Not happening, Bastila."

She picked up the blaster rifle, carefully lined up her target and aimed it at the man, I frowned. "Now wait a minute here…."

Phoenix fired the blaster and the bolt went straight at the man, but suddenly I heard the snap hiss of a lightsaber and a yellow double bladed lightsaber was ignited. A Jedi? the man was a bloody Jedi! Bastila! Jedi! What kind of allies did this woman have? The blaster bolt was calmly deflected away and the lightsaber was extinguished.

I thought back on the swoop race. There had been a female Jedi with a lightsaber fighting alongside Phoenix. I frowned some more, of course how could I be so thick? It was a disguise and I wondered who came up with the idea to disguise, Malak's wanted Jedi? I doubted that a Jedi would like to be disguised in such a manner. If I had to bet on whose idea it was….I grinned at Phoenix, clever. She was a clever woman to think of putting a female Jedi into a male disguise.

Phoenix lowered the weapon with a grin. "How did I do Canderous?"

I laughed. "Not bad, not bad at all, considering your opponent is a Jedi."

Meanwhile, I watched as the Jedi came up to me. "That's not funny"

Phoenix suddenly grinned. "Oh come on, Bastila, lighten up. I knew you'd block it. Only an idiot would let themselves get hit by a blaster bolt."

"I cannot believe that you would shoot at me, Phoenix. What kind of lessons is this merc teaching you?"

"I only taught her how to line up a target; I didn't encourage her to shoot at you.

Phoenix sighed."Canderous, meet Bastila. Bastila this is Canderous. You'll have to excuse Bastila's appearance, but when you're on a Sith held planet and Malak is looking specifically for you….then a disguise is necessary."

The female Jedi glared at her. "Phoenix! How can you trust…."

I laughed. "Jedi princess has a point. But don't you worry your pretty little Jedi head. I dislike Malak more than I dislike you. It's a shame that Revan isn't still alive because if he was, I'd gladly deliver you up to Revan."

Bastila paled and then said. "Can you explain why you won't deliver me to Malak but why you'd deliver me up to Revan?"

"Simple. Revan had my respect. His tactics, his skill in combat and his cunning. Delivering up enemies to him would have been an honor. Malak, if he was half the man that Revan was, we wouldn't be having this conversation. Malak is brutal, cruel, and has no sense of honor. I deliver you up to him, I couldn't guarantee that I would survive the encounter. It's well known that Malak goes back on his word, he promises great rewards, riches, for you princess, but….I don't trust him to deliver. Deals with Malak usually end up broken. Revan, now he may have been a Sith after our war but at least he was a man of his word. Deliver you up, he would have rewarded me amply. It's simply a matter of who I would prefer to deal with, Bastila. You're very fortunate that your Jedi strike team took Revan out."

Bastila shook her head. "Mandalorian your sense of honor is skewed." She glared at Phoenix. "And you want to deal with this man whose word is based on who he believes is a more honorable Sith!"

I could sense a cat fight coming on so I said. "Phoenix, I'll be outside."

She nodded and said. "Thanks for the lesson, Canderous."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Bastila had her arms across her chest in a very cross manner. "Phoenix tell me you're not going through that death match."

"I am, Bastila."

"And what happens if you die?"

"I didn't plan on dying, Bastila."

"I see so you have a foolish pride in yourself and your abilities, you maybe gifted, but even Jedi die."

I sighed. "Look Bastila, there is a bounty on Bendak Starkiller's head and I intend to clam it."

"I don't believe that for a minute, Phoenix. Why are you truly doing this? Is it for credits? Is it because he insulted you? Please be honest with me Phoenix, tell me why are you doing this?"

I sighed and looked at Bastila, she was serious. "Why won't you let this go, Bastila?"

"Because I care about you, Phoenix. I don't know what...Carth, Mission, Zaalbar, or I would do if you ended up dying. Don't you feel anything about us and think of what would happen if something happened to you? Or are you simply reckless?"

I looked at Bastila, this time at her eyes. They were deep and intense, begging and pleading with me not to do this. I sighed and decided to at least be honest, because somehow Bastila seemed to sense the restlessness I felt within me "Maybe because I feel like I have to do this, Bastila. They say the Mandalorians sought out the Republic to test themselves against us. Maybe I am doing this because I feel like I need to test myself."

Bastila frowned. "Test yourself, against what?"

"Myself, my emotions, my feelings, you, Carth, Mission, Zaalbar, the universe in general. Sometimes the greatest enemy isn't the one in front of you, but yourself. Facing Bendak, I feel like I am not really facing him, I am facing myself. I need to do this…..Bastila. If I don't….I'll never overcome a part of myself or be able to face any other major enemy in the future. So now do you understand why I must face him."

Bastila sighed. "Maybe….but that is the most convoluted answer I've ever heard in my life and I still think what you're doing, using a death match to prove yourself mentally and physically is wrong. I want to stop you, but…." Bastila sighed. "I don't think I can, can I?"

I shook my head negatively and Bastila said calmly. "Very well, Phoenix. At least, you admitted to me honestly why you are doing this. Just promise me… that you will try not to die, because that would be foolish indeed."

I smiled softly. "Thank you for at least trying to understand, and not trying to use the Force to stop me. Anyway, I promise I will try not to die."

I watched as Bastila walked off and Canderous came back in and he said. "I heard what you said, kid. I think you're a bit more Mandalorian in your ideals than I realized."

I smiled at Canderous. "Maybe or I just knew the right words to get Bastila to leave me alone. So….let's get back to training."

* * *

After a few days of pushing myself, aiming at targets stationary and non-stationary, and focusing most of my energy in strengthening my skill in using a blaster, I knew that I had to finally bring this to a resolution.

Canderous and I sat in chairs at a table in the Cantina; he pushed over to me a cup of Tarisian ale. "Well kid, drink up. As soon as this is over we can get back to getting those Sith launch codes."

I nodded. "You seem to have confidence that I can kill Bendak, at least that's more confidence than Bastila has in me."

"You have the will and look of a warrior about you, Phoenix. I can tell. The way you push yourself and the inner drive you have, you'll be fine. Your fight with Bendak, it will be a glorious battle. I can't wait to see it and I can't wait to see Bendak's organs plastered all over the place."

I laughed. "As long as it isn't my organs plastered all over the place." I finished the cup of Tarisian ale and I stood up, "No time like the present to challenge Bendak Starkiller. Do you want to see me offer up the challenge?"

He shook his head. "This fight is yours Phoenix, and yours alone. The challenge is yours and yours alone. It would not be proper for me to be there." I nodded. "Thanks for honoring your part of the deal with me and I will return and I will honor my part, retrieving the Sith base launch codes."

 **0-o-0**

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Bendak!"

"So you're the one doing Zax's dirty work. Well I've got some bad news for you, little bounty hunter. There's no way you're bringing me in. This cantina is wired with a top-level security grid. You pull a weapon on me and the auto-fire turrets will fry you before you can even pull the trigger."

"Yea, that's what I figured Bendak. Anyway, I challenge you to a death match so I can collect that bounty. So name the time and place!

"Finally – fresh meat! Ajuur will set it all up; go talk to him. It will take some time to arrange, so no point sticking around here until then. I'll be back when it's time for you to die!"

"Don't count on it Bendak…."

After talking with Ajuur and arranging the match for tomorrow. I had to let the others know and I returned to our hideout and entering I looked at the others, "It's done. The match is set…..I face Bendak tomorrow."

Zaalbar moaned. "I would take your place, Phoenix Star."

I shook my head. "No Zaalbar, this is my fight and my fight alone. Thanks for offering though."

Mission's eyes went wide. "I've seen Bendak's death matches, Nix. They are pretty brutal. I threw up once after watching one of them. He….ummm...decapitated his opponent."

I cringed a bit and Bastila seeing me cringe stated calmly. "You can still back out, Phoenix. It's no great shame to admit that you made an error in judgment. None of us will think any less of you."

I sighed. "The only one I would think any less of, Bastila is myself. This is my fight, my challenge, and my struggle. If I don't do it then what other fights will I back out of in the future? I can't do that Bastila, as much as I am starting to believe that you may be right, that this is an error in judgment on my part, I just can't back out of it. Maybe one of these days you'll understand."

She sighed. "Perhaps."

Carth said nothing and I frowned. "Don't have any words for me, Republic?"

He sighed." You know how I felt about this earlier, Phoenix. I thought I talked you out of it. I really wish you'd listen to Bastila, Phoenix. After all we've been through…I don't want you to go. I…." He paused. He seemed to hesitate. "I care about you, Phoenix." His eyes reflected worry. "Yet, I can see you're driven regardless. Since I can't talk you out of it then all I can do is wish you luck and please come back to us alive."

I smiled. "Thanks Carth. I promise you I'll come back….I'll come back for you."

* * *

I used what credits we had to buy some heavier armor. I knew that Bendak would be a formidable opponent so heavier armor than the light Echani armor was necessary. I also had a concealed hold-out blaster I had bought. Yea. the weapon was illegal but the match was also illegal so carrying an illegal weapon to an illegal fight seemed rather apropos. The blaster would be my wild pazaak card. I knew Bendak had seen all my fights and knew that I favored melee.

Let him keep thinking I was a lousy shot. I held some grenades in a bandoleer as well. I was all set. My favorite Echani duel blade in hand as well. As I stood waiting for the announcement to start the fight. I injected stim after stim into my blood stream. I felt my muscles pump up and my energy level go up. I suddenly laughed, maybe it was the manic energy of the stims in my blood stream or it was the excitement of the coming fight. I was going to my death, or at least that's what Bastila and Bendak thought. I felt otherwise though. Somehow I knew I was going to win this. I didn't know how I knew, I just knew. I quickly turned on an energy shield.

And then the announcer began his announcement, the one that would end with one of his dead and the other alive.

 _Ladies and gentlemen, come with me now on a journey to the savage days of years gone by... to a time when two combatants entered the arena, and only one came out alive. They're illegal, they're banned, they've been outlawed for nearly ten years – but we've got one for you tonight! A good, old-fashioned death match!_

 _In this corner, a living legend. A man who's very name would make his opponents shake in their boots… if any of them were still alive. Ha ha ha! Out of retirement for one last battle: Bendak Starkiller!_

 _And who would be crazy enough to step into the ring with such a lethal legend? Who would be mad enough to face almost certain death merely for your enjoyment? Ladies and gentlemen, feast your wondering eyes on… the Mysterious Stranger!_

 _And now, the moment we've all been waiting for… LET THE DEATH MATCH BEGIN!_

Bendak suddenly began throwing grenades at me and I ran straight for him, my melee blade going. He shot at me; luckily that energy shield kept the blaster shots from penetrating me. I felt my heart beating quickly in my chest. As I swung my blade, Bendak came up with his own blade and the fight was on. He laughed and taunted me."Getting tired, Stranger…."

I snorted and then grabbed an antidote pack and lobbed a poison grenade into Bendak's face. It went off and both of us were poisoned. I quickly injected the antidote.

"How about you…..feeling sick, maybe?"

"I'll never surrender to a pathetic female like you."

"I am not pathetic, Bendak, and as for being a woman. This woman will see you dead."

He shoved his body into me, the heavy armor lurching into me and tearing into whatever skin that was exposed. He was heavier than I was. I bet the betting was heavily favored in Bendak's favor than mine. I knew I should have told Republic or Mission to bet heavily on me, and why am I thinking about creds at a time like this?

Blade for blade, we were pretty evenly matched. I knew Bendak knew it and I knew that I knew it. I suddenly leaped away from him; this melee combat was going to get me killed. I'd have to avoid him. He began to open fire on me with his blaster. I ran and began to lob grenades at him.

He also began to lob grenades at me, and suddenly my ears burned in pain, sonic grenade, I couldn't move as I was disoriented and if I took one step forward I would fall down. I saw three Bendak's coming at me instead of the one. I was dead.

 _Phoenix…._

Not again, not that dark voice. Why did it come when I was near death or danger and always in combat?

 _Fall over, if Bendak thinks you are dead, then play dead…._

That made no sense, no sense at all….

 _Do it!_

I fell over.

I could hear the crowd boo and hiss. They thought I was dead too. Somewhere I could hear Bastila.

"PHOENIX!"

And then I saw Bendak lunge over me blaster in hand, ready to kill me and my face resolved into one of hard coldness.

 _Kill him, Phoenix, he doesn't know….he doesn't know….your sleeve._

I grinned. I understood now. The hold-out blaster came from my sleeve, hidden under my armor and I fired dead center into his helmet and into his head. Bendak froze. I fired again and yet again. Bendak suddenly fell to his knees. I fired again into his helmet and he fell dead on top of me. I groaned as I shoved Bendak's body off of me.

I slowly rose from the arena floor, the audience cheered, yelling

"Stranger! Stranger! Stranger!"

 _Bendak is down! It's over! It's over! The fight is over! Bendak Starkiller is down! Bendak Starkiller is dead! All hail the Mysterious Stranger, the greatest duelist to ever grace the rings of Taris!_

I breathed heavily, I was alive. My opponent was dead and my world was spinning…..and then I fell and all went black….


	24. Chapter 23: Taris: Running out of Time

**Chapter 23: Taris: Running out of Time**

 **~Phoenix~**

I groaned as I woke up. I heard Bastila's voice. "Thank the Force…."

I coughed and Bastila pressed a glass of water to my lips. I gulped the water down and she put her hand to my forehead. "Your fever is broken that's a good thing."

I muttered. "You were right, Bastila, this was a stupid thing to do."

She sighed. "Well at least now you're acknowledging that I was right about that death match, you almost lost your life over it."

I focused around, I didn't recognize where we were. "Where are…."

"The Hidden Bek base. We had to relocate. Gadon and the Beks are offering us sanctuary because of what you have done for them. The Sith started asking questions about your death match. They started questioning Ajuur over all his fighters. You're wanted for questioning. We couldn't stay around, obviously. Plus I've heard some of the duel fighters mention that the Sith are looking for a Nasi, and Nix as well as Mission and Zaalbar."

Bastila suddenly plopped a pouch on my stomach. I picked it up to find it was full of credits. "I managed to get your duel winnings and your bounty Phoenix, but I have to say, was it worth it?"

"You're lecturing me, now? Geeze Bastila, you're heartless."

"I am not heartless, Phoenix. I am simply asking a question, was all this fuss over Bendak worth it?"

I paused a moment and I looked thoughtful thinking this all over. "For me, yes. Maybe not for the rest of you."

"So are you admitting that you were selfish pursuing Bendak for your own personal reasons and sacrificed our safety in the process?"

I couldn't answer; I knew Bastila was right. I sighed and finally responded. "Damn it Bastila, I am not perfect. What do you want from me an admission that I was stupid?"

She paused a moment and then continued. "I am sorry if I came off as being harsh, but if you wish to be a Jedi, you must learn that your actions can be devastating as a whole towards everybody."

I nodded and sighed. "Alright….I am sorry. I made a mistake. Just...please don't rub anymore salt into me. I've been chastised enough, okay."

Bastila nodded and looked at me. "You need to get up and get dressed. You've been out for days."

"What happened?"

"You overloaded your adrenal system with stims. I am not much of a healer, Phoenix, but I managed to use the Force and purged a lot of those stims out of you but you developed a high fever. I was worried about you." She paused a moment, "The others were also equally concerned. Anyway, we need to get those Sith codes, and I know you might not feel up to it, but I need your help. Malak's net is drawing closer on us, and this planet is no longer safe for us. I asked Canderous about it and apparently, we have to pick up a droid that can slice into the military base. He says that Davik, the head of the local Exchange purchased a droid from a twi'lek named Janice Nall."

I nodded and got up but as I got up, my legs felt wobbly. Damn it. Bastila held onto my hand. "I hope this doesn't end up being a suicide mission."

"If the Force is with us, Phoenix, we will be fine."

"I hope you're right, Bastila."

As I slowly managed to threw on my outfit and then as an afterthought I put on my armor. "So I assume Carth is coming with us. I couldn't ask Mission or Zaalbar to risk their lives on this, although I am sure, they would volunteer to help us in a heartbeat."

Bastila nodded quietly.

As we exited the room, Mission hugged me. "Nix….I was worried." I patted her on the back. "Well I am fine, right as rain, you could say."

She smiled. "That death match, had me on the edge of my seat. I thought….well it got scary near the end. I still can't believe you blew Bendak away like that."

Bastila gave a hard glance at me, as if she was trying to tell me I needed to apologize for my actions in front of Mission. What the frack? I thought Jedi were supposed to be forgiving and understanding not hard like this. Didn't I just tell her not to rub salt into me?

I grinned and decided to not be as hard as Bastila and be a bit less overbearing. "Yea, I did give a bit of a dramatic showing. Anyway, it was kind of stupid, Mission. I overloaded myself with stims and nearly got myself killed. So what have you been up to since I was out?"

Mission grinned. "Well Nix, Gadon made me a full Hidden Bek."

I smiled. "Well it's about time, you earned it at any rate. Where's Zaalbar?"

Mission chuckled. "You know Zaalbar, he's helping himself to the Bek's food larder."

I laughed. "Well he is a growing wookiee, and he needs his eight squares."

A light cough from Carth, brought my attention to him and I grinned. "Hey Republic, ready for action?"

He smiled. "Always Phoenix. That fight…."

"I….I am back, Carth, I promised I'd come back."

"So you did."

I paused a moment. "Anyway…..I am sorry….I worried you."

"You're alive Phoenix, that's all that matters."

I nodded, I felt awkward, as if I wanted to say something but couldn't.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I could feel Phoenix's heart flutter within her chest at the sight of Carth. I didn't have the heart to tell her that if she became a Jedi, she would have have to let Carth go. Phoenix wasn't a Jedi though and I couldn't exactly forbid Phoenix for having feelings for Carth, she hadn't even acted on those feelings. I felt suddenly ashamed, perhaps I had the wrong impression about Phoenix, I could tell that she brought a tremendous amount of will to bear in regards to her attachment to Carth Onasi. Yet, the struggle was apparent. Both of them must have had some sort of agreement not to pursue each other in a relationship.

This mission the council had given me was getting harder. Watching after Revan wasn't as easy as I had thought. Phoenix had her own will, her own spirit and it was only going to get harder as the days went on.

Taking care of Phoenix after her death match, had exhausted me, treating her reminded me of that moment on the bridge of Revan's flagship and the following moments on Dantooine. It pained me deeply sitting in a private room in the Bek base tending to her and I feared that I might lose Revan once again.

I thought of the death match, I sat watching Phoenix's fight in the arena. I had felt it. The dark taint, a small tendril of darkness that came from Phoenix. It seemed to come forward during the final moments of the duel. Revan's subconscious, a remnant of what little remained of the Dark Lord. How much remained though? I couldn't answer that question, because after Phoenix killed Bendak the tendril disappeared and submerged back into the deep recesses of Phoenix's mind.

I coughed as Phoenix simply stared at Carth, her eyes filled with obvious longing towards the Republic pilot, "We need to get started on getting those launch codes."

Phoenix spoke. "Of course, Bastila."

I turned towards Mission. "Mission stay put with the Hidden Beks, if…." I paused, I couldn't hint at the possibility of failure. We had to succeed. "We will return."

Mission nodded. "Okay Bastila, although I really wish you'd let me and Zaalbar come. We could be a big help."

"I know Mission. Your contributions have been most helpful to us. However…."

Mission suddenly stated firmly. "It's because you think I am a kid. You think I am not good enough for this part of the mission."

"I never said anything about you being a kid."

She snorted. "You didn't have to, I've seen it in the faces of the Beks, shoot even Carth thinks of me as a kid."

Carth sighed. "Mission, I am sorry what I said earlier. I've just been on edge with everything lately. You have to know that I don't think you're helpless. Look at where we are, what you've been doing. You're not just along for the ride. We need you."

Mission nodded. "You really mean that don't you. Nobody's ever said anything like that to me before, not even Big Z. Sure he might think it, but he's not really one for words you know. Thanks Carth."

"Ahh it's no big deal. I know how it is. Sometimes you just need to hear a few words of encouragement. Kids are like that."

Mission put her hands on her hips and fumed. "Kids are like that? Listen you…." She suddenly took a deep breath and then said. "Oh I get it. Okay you've got me. You're pretty funny, Carth for an old guy."

Phoenix suddenly spoke. "Mission, I know you'd like to come on this but if anything happened to you in the Sith base." She sighed. "I don't think I could forgive myself. Promise me one thing."

Mission nodded. "What's that, Nix?"

"Stay ready as back up, if we get in trouble, we might need your slicing skills outside of the Sith base. You can remote slice, can't you?"

Mission grinned. "You bet I can, Nix. I'll be ready, just contact me and I'll slice into the Sith computers as easy as Nerf butter."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I grumbled as the rain poured down on Upper Taris and was soaking us through the rain gear we were wearing. "It would have to rain."

Bastila said quietly. "We should be glad of it, Phoenix. Look at all the citizens covered in rain gear. It masks us perfectly. The Sith are going to have a hard time finding us amid all the other citizens of Taris."

I sighed. she did have a point. "I suppose you're right."

Bastila nodded. "Oh and Phoenix, thanks for giving something useful to Mission. I don't know if I could have been as quick suggesting something like that."

"She just wants to feel useful, Bastila. Everyone in the galaxy needs a purpose otherwise they feel helpless. And I wasn't just pulling something random for her to do either; she may have to slice into something later on. Best, to let her know in case we do need her."

We saw a Sith soldier coming and we were quiet, Bastila's hand reaching quietly for her lightsaber. However, the Sith soldier apparently was just on patrol and they walked on by us and we breathed a sigh of relief.

Carth suddenly spoke. "You know Bastila, I've been thinking."

Bastila's eye rose. "Yes, Carth."

"How did those Vulkars manage to capture a famous Jedi like you? Were you knocked out when your escape pod crashed?"

"No, I was conscious. But my Force powers were exhausted from using my battle meditation in the battle for the __Endar Spire__. Without my help you might never have gotten off the ship alive."

"Fair enough. But I've seen you Jedi in action. There's no way those thugs would have stood a chance against your lightsaber"

"My lightsaber was… misplaced. I couldn't find it after the crash. I looked _everywhere_ in that pod. The Vulkars came and overwhelmed me even as I was searching for my weapon."

"Wait a minute...I know we found your lightsaber earlier but losing your lightsaber? Carth suddenly laughed. "I mean, isn't that a violation of some kind of Jedi code or something?

I suddenly chuckled along with Carth. "Of all the Jedi in the galaxy, why do we get one who's absent-minded?"

"This is no laughing matter! During the crash my lightsaber must have… it must have fallen from my belt and rolled away from me!"

Carth nodded. "I'm sorry. It's just funny to think of a legendary Jedi losing her lightsaber. Take my advice: this is one detail you might want to keep out of the history texts."

"I hardly consider myself a legend, Carth. Though I will consider your advice when I relate these events to the Jedi Council. There is no need for them to know _every_ detail of what transpired. "

I chuckled lightly. "Well history aside, let's make some of our own, The history texts will read, "Phoenix Star, and her two brave companions, bought droid and then made a daring escape from Taris."

Bastila shook her head. "I doubt that it will be _that_ easy Phoenix."

"Well….I can hope, can't I? Seriously, Bastila, are you always this pessimistic?"

"I am not pessimistic!"

I rolled my eyes. "Yea you are."

We entered Janice Nall's shop. The shop seemed pretty quiet. A twi'lek perked up almost instantly at seeing us enter.

"A customer? Come in, come in. Janice Nall at your service. Welcome to my droid and droid supply shop. Always good to see a new face – customers are hard to come by. A lot of the Taris citizens won't even come in here; they refuse to shop at a store owned by a twi'lek."

I shook my head and Carth stated. "You'd think people would be a little more tolerant of others in this day and age. I guess stupidity and ignorance will never go out of style."

"Hi Janice, Canderous sent us, he said that you had a T3-M4 droid for us."

"Oh, Canderous sent you! Okay, the droid is ready. You can have it for 2000 credits."

I nearly gagged. "What! I thought Davik paid for the droid."

"He gave me a down payment, but the rest is due on delivery. If he sent you here to get the droid without giving you the final payment, that's between you and him. But I still need my 2000 credits."

I checked my pouch, I didn't have that at all, I barely had a thousand credits, I spent way too much going after Bendak Starkiller. I looked at Bastila. "Come on Bastila, help me out here…."

She frowned at me and said quietly. "I am sorry, Phoenix, I cannot in good conscious use the Force to deny a woman what she's rightfully owed."

I hissed back into her ear. "So you'd keep us stuck on Taris! Maybe you want to be in Malak's clutches, but I sure as frack don't."

Carth frowned. "Come on you two….we have to get that droid, so come up with something!"

I glared at the woman, "Give me that droid for…."

Bastila sighed. "Fine….."

"Sell us that droid for five hundred credits…." She waved her hand gently calling upon the Force.

The twi'lek's eyes glazed over and she said. "Tell you what I'll sell you that droid for five hundred credits."

I nodded and quietly put five hundred credits into the Twi'lek's hand. Bastila shook her head as we exited the shop with T3.

Bastila was oddly quiet and I said to her. "Look Bastila, I am sorry."

"I did not enjoy that, Phoenix."

"No one asked you to, Bastila. But..." I paused a minute,"have you ever thought that doing that was a sacrifice and well…." I paused, "Sacrifices are not meant to be pleasant."

Bastila sighed. "I suppose….look Phoenix, I rather not talk about this."

I shrugged. "Alright, but thank you just the same."

We quietly walked up to the Sith base with T3. I grinned at T3. "Okay droid….do your stuff."

T3 beeped. ::What do you mean by stuff?..::

"You know what I mean droid, your programming."

T3 beeped::You need to clarify more, I have programming, what do you need me to do?..::

I sighed, wonderful; a droid that needed step by step instructions as if just putting the droid in front of the base wasn't good enough. "Just slice into the military base, please."

T3 beeped in affirmation and I watched as the droid quietly sliced into the military base and then beep pleasurably:: I have it, Phoenix.::

I raised an eyebrow; these droids were known to develop all sorts of quarks. So now it was calling me Phoenix rather than master, as most droids were known to do.

"Thanks T3"

T3 beeped its appreciation.

I looked at Carth, and Bastila and grinned, "Now the fun begins."

Bastila snorted. "I'd hardly call this fun, Phoenix."

Carth smiled and chuckled. "Let's go then..."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

It was good to have Phoenix back in action. I had missed her. I had watched her death match and like Bastila, I had feared that Phoenix wouldn't be coming back. I had watched amazed as Phoenix who had issues trying to use a blaster, had finished Bendak Starkiller with a hold-out blaster. The training with Canderous had done her good. When she passed out, I ran down into the arena and retrieved her. I had the right, because I was her 'agent.' Then all frack had broken out as the Sith came into the arena a few minutes later saying a raid was going on. Somehow, between Mission, Zaalbar, Bastila and me, we managed to escape. We grabbed our gear from our hideout and bolted. We didn't dare stay put any more. Phoenix had been right about one thing, our luck was running out.

It seemed to me that Bastila and Phoenix seemed to be vying for control over the mission. Technically, Bastila had the rank but Phoenix had the experience and age over the padawan. Bastila seemed to be getting frazzled over Phoenix and I couldn't understand why. I noticed it in the glances that Bastila was giving her and the way they spoke to each other. Yea, it was true that Phoenix was exasperating at times but you got use to her after awhile and learned to deal with her quirky personality. She had a quick and witty tongue that I began to appreciate a lot. She reminded me at lot of my wife. Maybe that's why I felt drawn to Phoenix, she reminded me of her.

This vying for control seemed to butt heads in Janice Nall's shop. I knew Phoenix kept a tight control on our resources she knew what we could or couldn't afford. Apparently, two thousand credits wasn't in the cards. She called on Bastila to do what a Jedi could do and that was mind trick the merchant and Phoenix was angry when Bastila refused. I couldn't blame Bastila or Phoenix, in many respects they were both right. Still, it left a bad taste in my mouth when Bastila used the Force to lower the price of the droid to basically whole sale. Yet, Phoenix had a point we had to get off Taris and that was the priority.

I watched as apparently Phoenix knew droid binary language tell T3 to get to work on slicing into the military base.

I chuckled and smiled at Phoenix's remark as well as Bastila's literal remark about fun. They were both right.

"Let's get going…."


	25. Chapter 24: Taris: The Sith Base

**Chapter 24: Taris: The Sith Base**

 **~Phoenix~**

"Hey – you can't come in here! This is a restricted area! You better tell me what you're doing or I'm going to hit the alarm!

I looked at the Twi'lek receptionist. "Please don't. I'll pay you fifty credits not to hit that alarm." I dug out fifty credits from my pouch and put them on the receptionist's table.

"50 credits? You've got a deal! The Sith have made my life a living hell ever since they took over this base."

The woman took the credits and pocketed them. "You know, it's about time someone stood up to these Sith! Just do me a favor and wait until I'm out of here before you start blasting the place up."

I nodded as the woman bolted out the same doorway we came in. I looked at T3. "T3, download a map of the complex from this woman's console we need to find the main complex to the facility."

T3 beeped::Of course, Phoenix.::

The droid rolled over to the receptionist desk.

I grinned. "So far so good."

Bastila shook her head. "We've hardly started and already you are getting too sure of yourself."

I frowned. "Bastila, I prefer to keep upbeat. I can't….well I can't think of defeat. I can only think of the victory. I'd rather think of the moment of our success. I can't admit the possibility of failure that would drag me down."

Carth nodded. "I get what Phoenix is trying to say, Bastila. Better to think like we've already won than consider defeat."

Bastila sighed. "Very well….I just don't want us to be over confident."

T3 beeped:: I've downloaded the map.:: There was a pause followed by more beeping::You didn't ask but I've found additional security protocols as well as access to various power conduits, security cameras etc. Would you like me to access them?::

I smiled. "Sure go ahead T3, the more Intel the better."

I waited as T3 cycled through the computer and it's database.

T3 beeped.:: There are several guards in several of the rooms near power conduits, do you wish me to overload the conduits? It will most assuredly kill them. I also found some blaster turrets that need to be turned off so they do not harm us, would you like me to switch those off?::

I thought that over, it would give us an advantage. "Go ahead T3, the less Sith and Sith defenses we deal with the better."

I heard a whirl as T3 proceeded to cycle through security settings. He beeped::Done. I have nothing more to go through on this computer, Phoenix::

"Okay, T3. Unplug yourself."

The droid unplugged from the computer and then beeped::What is our objective? I'd like to know In case all of you are incapacitated. I would then complete your mission, it must be important to you because you bribed the receptionist..::

I raised an eyebrow; yep this droid was starting to exhibit signs of individualism. It thinks it can complete the task on its own. Independently from all of us, Geeze, how self assured can one get?

I shook my head not sure what to think of this, Carth frowned. "What? What did that droid say?"

"It thinks it can complete the mission if we are disabled."

Bastila interjected. "What a stuck up…conceited…."

I chuckled; I had to admit that I had the same thoughts about Bastila at times.

Carth frowned and interrupted Bastila. "Listen here droid; we are perfectly capable of completing the mission on our own."

T3 beeped.::I only wish to be backup. I didn't ask for you both to be rude.::

I laughed. and Carth and Bastila frowned and both said together, "What?"

"T3 said you are being rude and only wishes to be backup."

Carth looked at the droid. "Maybe getting this droid was a mistake."

I laughed. "Well it is getting a bit self assured, isn't it? But it might not be a bad idea to give it our objective just in case we are separated, injured, or worse."

I turned to T3. "T3 we are seeking the departure codes from the Sith base. We need them so we can escape the Taris quarantine. It is imperative beyond all costs that we access those codes. If something happens to us in the process, download them and get them to Mission Vao and her wookiee, Zaalbar. She will know what to do with them and know what to do regarding us."

I plugged my data pad into T3. "Here's the info on Mission and her wookiee, Zaalbar, in case the worst happens."

Bastila shook her head. "You seem to be putting a lot of trust in that droid."

I shrugged. "Well Bastila, I'd rather be prepared for the worst case scenario, just in case."

T3 spat out the data pad as it took the info from it.

T3 beeped::Thank you for putting trust in me, Phoenix. I won't forget it.::

"Yea only if you're not memory wiped first, you cheeky little droid."

T3 then suddenly stated. dwooooooo, as it considered the thought that I might memory wipe him.

I laughed. "Yea, you're only as good as the human you trust, but don't worry I don't think I'll memory wipe you."

T3 beeped back::Thank you, Phoenix. I like you.::

I shook my head; this droid was an odd sort of being. The more I talked to it, the more it seemed to be asserting a personality that it shouldn't have.

I shouldered my weapon. "Come along. Let's go kick some Sith all the way back to Korriban."

T3 beeped::My weapons are primed and ready, but how does one kick the Sith from Taris to Korriban when the planet is quarantined?::

I suddenly laughed. "You know I think I am beginning to like this little droid."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Phoenix's emotional level was way too high for me to like. It threatened to overwhelm me. She needed Jedi discipline and Jedi control. Her boisterous laughter, her eagerness for combat. I sighed and tried to shield myself. Hoping beyond hope that it would block a lot of the emotional ties I felt streaming from her. Yet, I knew that it would take a good amount of Force to keep myself blocked from Phoenix's unintentional psychic backlash. I knew sadly I could not keep that type of shield up forever. I would have to fight and I couldn't block out Phoenix and fight at the same time. Yet, the relief I felt in blocking Phoenix out made me feel almost better.

We walked down hallways carefully; I was still wearing that stupid disguise that Phoenix had made for me. I had had it; I carefully took the fake mustache off and the cape that Phoenix put with my disguise. Phoenix shook her head. "You act like you're planning on going up against Malak."

I shook my head."No, just tired of hiding, Phoenix. I don't plan on wearing it anymore. Besides if the Sith see me with a lightsaber, it's not as if they are not going to know who I am."

Phoenix grinned. "That's a pity, I thought it suited you."

"What! Are you saying you made me wear this disguise because you liked it."

Phoenix shook her head."Geeze Bastila get a grip, remember where we're at."

Carth then scolded her, "Phoenix, stop teasing Bastila, this isn't exactly the time for it."

Phoenix nodded, "I know that….it's just….well I thought she could handle…." She then sighed, "I am sorry…..I am just...I am nervous that's all and I can't help but joke when I am nervous."

I bowed my head a bit and then patted Phoenix on the shoulder suddenly feeling for the woman. "It's alright. I understand. Come on."

We walked through mazes of hallways and rooms and we quickly cleared them of Sith soldiers and combat droids.

We entered a room with Force Cages and found a Duros in one of the Force Cages, I didn't recognize him but he spoke to Phoenix and Carth.

"You there – human. Remember me? You helped me once before when the Sith were trying to arrest me. Outside you apartment. Do you remember?"

Phoenix look thoughtful, "Yea, I remember you. I nearly…." She turned beet red, "I almost hurt you."

"I am in need of your help once again. The Sith are going to execute me for removing the Sith corpse from your apartment complex. Please, help me out of this cage."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I looked at the Duros in the cell as he begged and pleaded for help. "We're not really here to rescue you."

Carth but a hand on my shoulder, "But he did help us, Phoenix."

I sighed and chewed a bit on the inside of my lip pondering if the risk of freeing him was worth it and if freeing him would harm our overall mission. The Force Cage humming away in the quiet room. I decided that the Duros wasn't a real risk to our overall mission after all, "How do we free you?"

"Switch all the panels on the wall to the red "off" position and I will be released. It is not as simple as it sounds – switching a panel will also switch the panel beside it. You must be careful as you do this, human. If you set all the panels to the green "on" position my cell's termination program will engage and I will be executed. "

"I see…." I barked out an order to T3-M4, "T3, free the Duros from the Force cage, but be careful. No Green markings on the panels."

T3 beeped and went over to the panels and carefully switched them off. The Force Cage faded away leaving the Duros free.

"Thank you, human. I do not know what you are doing inside this military base, but I am grateful. Once again I owe you a debt I can never repay. Now I must leave this place before the Sith discover I have escaped. If you are wise, you will do the same. If the Sith capture you I doubt anyone else will come by to set you free."

I sighed. "I wish we could leave, but we can't…..but maybe you can help us."

The Duros looked intrigued. "How sentient?"

"If something happens to us, T3 has been told to abandon us and get help. However, our contact for T3 is in the Lower City and it is unlikely that a droid will be allowed on its own into the Lower City. You, however….."

The Duros nodded. "I see. I take the droid to your contact in the Lower…."

Bastila interrupted. "How can we trust him? He might memory wipe T3 and keep him for his own or….sell him. It's too much of a risk."

Carth nodded. "I agree."

"You guys have any better ideas?"

Bastila shook her head negatively. "No, I do not, but to put our trust in an alien you've only met once before."

"I agree with you Bastila and hopefully the Force willing we won't need his help, but I'd like to have a backup plan."

The Duros nodded. "I understand if you don't trust me….."

"But desperation makes trust where there is normally none. I'll give you a try. I doubt we will even need you."

I glared at the Duros, my normally calm face hardened and my face became as cold as ferrocrete, as I handed him my datapad

"Enter your contact information and I will give it to T3 to memorize. If you do not come through in 2 standard hours. I will tell the Sith everything regarding you. A planet under quarantine is not an easy place to hide, you cannot leave the planet, you escaped once, and you will not escape again."

Bastila glared at me. "Phoenix….."

I raised my hand. "If we burn Bastila….we burn together."

The Duros shuddered. "Such a threat, sentient, but I accept your concern." He sighed. "For saving my life you will have my cooperation."

He wrote down his info into the data pad and I looked it over and committed it to memory. I then popped it into T3 who took the data. The data pad out and I deleted the information.

"Good bye…..if T3 comes to you, then you know you have two hours." The Duros nodded and took off.

Carth glared at me. "That was harsh, Phoenix."

Bastila nodded quietly. "I agree, with Carth.

"All right….I get it. But you said it yourselves we couldn't trust him. The only way to bind his cooperation was to sell him out to the Sith. I am not happy with it either, but hopefully we won't need him."

I turned quietly, and opened the doors that lead out of this cell, I didn't feel like talking about it. I felt guilty. I looked at the map, T3 downloaded. T3 bumped into me and beeped::You did what you had to do. Strategically, your decision was sound, Phoenix.::

"Yea it was, but…."

T3 beeped::But?::

"You're a droid, you wouldn't get it. Sentients are not supposed to turn on each other like kath hounds."

T3's beeping turned into questioning beeps::I don't understand. You are not kath hounds.::

I chuckled lightly, the droid's statement made me feel slightly better. "Exactly T3. Exactly."

The map ended up leading us to an elevator. I tried to open it and found it needed a code to be opened; we had to be getting closer to where we needed to be.

"T3 slice the elevator open."

T3 beeped::Of course, Phoenix.:: It took a few moments but the elevator opened and all us entered.

The doors closed and I pointed to the camera I saw in the elevator. "Carth…..the camera!"

Carth nodded and took his blaster out and he blasted the camera away, he sighed. "I am not sure if that's going to do much good, Phoenix. I am pretty sure the Sith know we are here."

"Yea, but why give them our picture!"

The elevator opened and we were at a doorway and Bastila shivered. "I can feel much evil here."

I paused a moment and closed my eyes, hoping I could feel or even sense what Bastila felt. Nothing. Wait….my body felt cold and icy. Is that what the Dark side felt like?

I opened the door and there in the room was a man in armor, his skin looked pale and icy. His eyes looked dead and hollow. His gaze suddenly rested upon me, and I felt like his gaze bore into me.

"Who dares to break my meditation? You will pay for interrupting my… wait. I sense the Force is strong with you. Very strong. Who would have thought a Force Adept could be found on this insignificant planet? But your talent is no match for a disciple of the dark side!"

I snorted. "The Dark side in the end will lead to your destruction, turn away from it before it is too late."

The man laughed. "Spoken like a true drone of the Jedi Council. We Sith, however, have learned to embrace the potential of the dark side. It is what gives us strength!"

He grabbed up a duel blade. "This meeting is a stroke of luck for me – my master will surely reward me with my lightsaber once I kill you!"

I rushed at him but suddenly couldn't move my body. He started raising his blade against me. I was paralyzed and couldn't move. Bastila rushed over to protect me. She suddenly spoke in my mind,

 _:: It is a Force power, found among the Jedi and the Sith, it paralyzes you so you cannot move. Be patient Phoenix, it does not last forever.::_

Carth shot away at him with his blasters and T3 rolled over and electrocuted the man.

Slowly I felt movement restored to my limbs and I finally was able to fight and I swung my blade at him. Suddenly pain ripped through my body and I felt weakened, my body drained of it's energy. What the frack was that? More Force powers? "Enough of this….." I snarled. I swung my blade at his head and my blade cut through his head. His head rolled off his shoulders and onto the floor while his body dropped to the floor.

I breathed in and out exhausted. "T3….the codes…..get the codes….."

T3 beeped and rolled over to the computer and began to download the codes. Bastila came over to me. "Are you alright, Phoenix?"

"No….that was unsettling, I felt helpless. I had no idea the Force could do that."

I clinched my weapon, my knuckles turning white, I vowed I'd never wanted to feel that helpless again and Bastila said calmly. "I am not immune to the effects of those Force powers either, Phoenix."

"Yes, but can you block them out or prevent how long they affect you?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes I cannot. If I am tired or weakened in combat and unable to concentrate, I cannot."

I snorted. "Then I will try to get stronger so I never feel helpless again."

Bastila said softly. "But helplessness is a feeling. You can be strong all you wish, but if you still feel helpless what good is it?"

I sighed. "Perhaps you are right, but I don't want to be caught off guard like that ever again."

Carth's voice interjected. "T3 has the codes, come on let's get out of here."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I felt Phoenix's rage after the fight, a sense of helplessness and frustration. I would have thought that I would have felt the same taint of Darkness from Phoenix that I had during the Death Match fight with Bendak Starkiller. However, this time I did not. This was purely and simply Phoenix's own frustration and rage coming through. I had to stop it, had to push it down and for the most part I did. Yet, it seemed now only to simmer and she vowed never to be caught off guard ever again.

We left the Sith base and picked up Mission and Zaalbar as we went to the Cantina. We walked up to Canderous, a big grin on his face as he ushered us all into a private room that Zak, the bounty hunter officer kept for private meetings. Meetings that undoubtedly were used for Davik's Exchange business.

The room was tacky at best, done all in Red Onderonian skills and gold inlays. Obviously Davik wanted to show whoever he met with that he was a rich and powerful individual.

Canderous offered us seats and we sat down around a table.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I grinned at Phoenix. "Welcome back to the land of the living kid. I saw your fight against Bendak, truly a great battle. You shocked him during the end, pulling out that hold out blaster like you did."

Phoenix seemed a bit lackluster over it. "Truthfully Canderous, I can't really remember all that happened. It must been what, like 20 seconds. All I remember was I was scared and had to act. It was all a blur, really."

I frowned and looked around and I saw that damn Jedi Bastila giving Phoenix a death glare. Jedi were a true paradox, all peace one moment and lightsabers blazing the next. I had little respect for them, their powers basically equated to cheating. The only Jedi I ever had any respect for was sadly dead and he had proven his worth, despite his powers, a million times over. I had a feeling that Phoenix was giving me the condensed version of her Bendak fight because of that damn Jedi wench. I'd talk to her later about it, alone.

"Now, I know the Sith military base had a break in. I know it was you. I know you've got those departure codes I need. So what do you say? We join forces and I can get you inside Davik's base – and right to the _Ebon Hawk_. We can go right now."

Phoenix grinned a bit. "Sure thing Canderous, we can go now but just one thing, won't Davik suspect something?"

"Davik's always looking to recruit new talent. I'll tell him how you won that swoop race and mention that you're interested in working for the Exchange. I'll say I brought you in so he could check you out. He'll have you stay at his estate for a couple days while he runs some background checks on you – that's standard procedure."

Suddenly that damn Jedi wench spoke up. "This is too risky. We should find another way."

"You got another plan, sister? Or are you just objecting 'cause you didn't think of it?"

"No, I... don't have another plan. I would rather not place my life in your hands, however."

I laughed. "I can say the same about you. That makes us even. Fortunately we both want to get off this rock, right? "

She was suddenly quiet.

I held up my hand. "Thing is I can't take all of you, if I did Davik would get suspicious. So you choose Phoenix, Three of you can come with me.

Phoenix chewed on the inside of her lip. I chuckled at the move, it was cute as well as the actions of a leader, as she seemed to be contemplating who to take and who to leave behind.

"Bastila…..I think we need your skills and Carth, I would never go anywhere without the most handsome pilot in the galaxy."

Bastila nodded quietly and Carth chuckled. "Of course Phoenix, with that comment how could I refuse."

She turned to Mission and Zaalbar. "Go back to our old hideout, it should be okay. The Sith are going to be swarming over their base. Keep yourselves low key. Watch after T3. We can't take him with us since it is technically Davik's droid and he knows way too much to be surrendered to Davik."

Mission nodded. "Okay, Nix."

"Okay….so I have a speeder parked out front, we should go now."


	26. Chapter 25: Shadows Fall over Taris

**Chapter 25: Shadows Fall over Taris**

 **~Malak~**

I stood looking over Taris, the Force a maelstrom before me a disturbance pricked at me. A soldier, a minor Lieutenant, one of Admiral Karath's men, trembled before me saying. "L-L-Lord Malak, there was a break-in at our military base. The governor was killed, d-d-decapitated. Files were stolen."

"Bastila….." I hissed. There was no doubt in my mind, that the break in involved her. The disturbance had been clarified in the man's words. I debated whether to kill the man for his news, but decided that the man did not warrant death, at least not yet. "Go fetch the admiral for me." The man bolted out of the room.

Moments later Admiral Karath entered on the bridge and walked up to me. "You summoned me, Lord Malak?"

I did not turn around as I gazed at the planet below. "The search for Bastila is taking too long. We cannot risk her escaping Taris. Destroy the entire planet."

Admiral Karath stuttered as he started to speak "The...the entire planet, Lord Malak? But...there are billions of people on Taris! We'd be slaughtering countless innocent civilians. Not to mention our own men still on the surface."

I turned to face him, incredulously. Wasn't this the same man who without question fired bombed Telos and did not complain? Yet, he had only done so when Revan had compelled his loyalty to me, through the firebombing of Telos. Afterwards, Revan had been angry that Telos had been used as a demonstration of Karath's loyalty. Revan had wanted and preferred another target. She insisted that Telos was somehow important.

"Your predecessor once made the mistake of questioning my orders, Admiral. Surely you are not so foolish to make the same mistake?"

He backed away from me, fear showing in his eyes. Had the Admiral gone weak? Perhaps he wasn't as loyal to me as I thought? The thought bugged me. The Admiral had joined the Sith through the guidance and support of Revan, my old Master.

My old master Revan, who insisted that the Mandalorians or even the Sith would not respect her as a leader by being a woman and so insisted she be known as a man. She insisted upon it with such a fury, that all in the Republic and even among the Jedi thought of her as man. There were few that knew her secret. Saul being one of the few who knew that she was a woman. Yet now, this weakness of loyalty to Revan manifested itself clearly in his eyes. One of these days he would fail me. There were rumors that my old Master had lifted up and promoted this pathetic man because she had taken him to her bed, in direct conflict with the Sith code. Love was a weakness, and anyone who thought otherwise was a fool. Yet anyone who even breathed such rumors about her or her paramour in her presence, ended up dead. Yet, the rumors gained more credence as Saul seemed to have a way of holding her favor. If she had been alive, no doubt he would have convinced her, to hold off destroying Taris. No more, this man would learn his place and that the Sith had no place for such misguided affections.

His hands lowered in a non-threatening manner. "Of….of course not my Lord Malak. I will do as you command. But it will take several hours to position our fleet."

"Then I suggest you begin immediately. You are dismissed, Admiral."

"Yes, Lord Malak." I turned back staring upon the planet.

* * *

 **~ Saul Karath~**

I sighed as I exited the room, this would have never have happened with Revan. Malak had gone mad, it was clear. The Sith had gone from a very calculated strategic conquering of the galaxy to a procedure of 'smash all planets that resist' and if the Sith couldn't have the planet, then raze it to the ground. The difference between Revan and Malak was like two sides of a two cred coin.

I remembered fondly twirling my fingers in Revan's short raven black hair during forbidden moments together. I had loved her. Her speeches as a Jedi and as a Sith had motivated me and my men during both wars. It amazed me how she used the Force to make her voice sound deep like a man's voice. It would have fooled me, had she not revealed herself to me. I missed her, her intellect, and her sharp military tactics. Now, I was subject to the whims of a mad man. At least Revan, knew strategy, and knew the difference between which targets should be left standing and what should fall under our thumb. Malak sadly lacked the tact to properly do so. He wantonly destroyed everything that lay in his path without thinking about the layout of the galaxy after war and conquest.

I remember being with her, in her chambers, the afterglow of moments spent together. We spent moments talking about her Empire. "What good is an Empire if all that's left is ashes, Saul? A proper conquest means, the order of the galaxy must be left intact, not burning rubble. I don't seek the destruction of the Republic, Saul. I wish to make it stronger. It's a dying pathetic mynock. It deserves to die and be reborn into an Empire which I alone can direct. Yet the foolish Jedi and incompetent senators can't see that. They only see me as a war lord."

I would laugh then kiss her lightly on the nose. "Never mind what those fools think, Lord Revan. You will kill them or convert them to your cause and make them realize the truth of your campaign."

She would grin lightly and say. "Flattery will get you nowhere, Admiral. You maybe my lover but I could easily break your neck like a gizka." She would give a knowing look, and lightly lift her hand, summon the Force, and apply light pressure on my neck and throat. She would never press too hard, not enough to hurt me. Just enough to warn me that she was the Dark Lord of the Sith. She would then release her hold and trace her finger down and twist the hairs on my chest and then laugh. "A very cute gizka I might add."

She was beautiful, a wondrous woman and my heart ached that Malak had killed a powerfully skilled Empress. Her end had come far too soon, the galaxy still needed her. Sadly, we were left with her apprentice, a man that did not seem worthy of her tutelage. Yet, I dare not defy, Malak. My fate had been tied to her with the Sith and now it was tied to Malak. What could I do? I sighed and spoke quietly as if she was still around. "What would you have done, Lord Revan?"

I heard her voice clearly in my mind. _Stall for time. Time is not only your enemy but your friend. Use it. Malak doesn't know how long it will really take. He's too dense to figure it out. You wouldn't have been able to fool me, but Malak didn't learn his lessons well enough from me. You said hours, stretch those hours out, make them count. Our resources are our men; do not let Malak squander them._

I smiled softly. _"Thank you…." Her memory, clearly holding influence on me. I turned to my work and gave an inflated time for the guns to be positioned on Taris. I submitted the time to Malak. He would probably grow impatient over that time, but what else could I do? Meanwhile I prepared evacuation ships to be sent to Taris to quietly evacuate our men and supplies._

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I was nervous as we entered Davik Kang's estate. They would want Phoenix's background. I knew Master Dorak had constructed an identity for her in the Republic through his contacts in the senate. Yet, I wondered how well it would go through with the background check with the Exchange. I didn't like this, and I had protested it when we were with Canderous. Yet, sadly the Mandalorian was correct; we didn't have that much choice. I looked at Phoenix as she was taking in the estate with wondrous eyes. I could feel the pull of memories that Phoenix was experiencing, somehow Davik's home was causing a lot of sensory and memory perception for her. That actually reminded me; I needed to question Phoenix about her past in some form or fashion. I had to know how well the implanted memories were in her mind. Yet this was something I needed to talk about with the masters.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I was amazed, this place was gorgeous, Davik's estate was by one of Taris' oceans. I had remembered Rukil had said the primary food source for Taris came from Taris' oceans. This estate was vast. I smelled the salt of the ocean and I inhaled that smell. I remembered my father had once taken me to one of the Deralian oceans for my birthday. I had my first sip of our wine from our vineyard as my father deemed me old enough to taste our wines. This estate reminded me eerily of my family's estate on Derelia. I felt suddenly homesick. I hadn't been home to Derelia since the Mandalorians had destroyed my home. I sniffed a bit and a tear went down my eye.

Bastila frowned a bit. "Are you feeling alright, Phoenix?"

I sighed. "Just homesick and tired. It's been awhile since I've been on a proper homestead."

She nodded. "It has been a long journey and time spent on Taris. I am feeling the strain as well. Don't worry, Phoenix, soon we will all get a proper rest."

Carth nodded. "I am feeling it too, Phoenix. We could all do with a rest."

As we entered the estate, Davik came up to Canderous. "So, Canderous – I see you have brought someone with you. Most intriguing, if I do say so myself. You usually travel alone."

My eyes drew upon Calo Nord, yea, Mission said to be careful around him because he had supposedly killed more than the Iridian flu and he spoke. "It's not like you to take on partners, Canderous. You're getting soft."

Canderous seemed to take offense at the insult and state, "Watch yourself, Calo. You may be the newest kath hound in the pack, but you aren't top dog yet!"

Davik looked firmly at them, "Enough! I won't have my top two men killing each other – that's not good business. I'm sure Canderous has an explanation as to why he's not working solo anymore."

Canderous grinned. "This is a special case, Davik. I ran into someone the Exchange might want to recruit. You may have heard something of their exploits already."

Davik looked at me and then nodded. "Ahh I recognize you, the rider who won the swoop race. Very impressive… as was your display in the rather heated battle afterwards."

I smiled softly. "Pleasure to meet you Davik, My name is Phoenix Star."

Calo suddenly spoke. "Phoenix Star?"

I nodded. "Yes, I am a smuggler." He held out his hand to me and I took it and shook the bounty hunters hand.

Bastila crossed over to me, as if she had some innate desire to protect me. I had to come up with some sort of lie as Davik and Calo were frowning at her. "This is my cousin. Delia. She insisted she had to meet Davik Kang, you see your reputation is quite well known among certain audiences."

Bastila smiled. "Yes, it is a pleasure to meet the legendary, Davik Kang," The two men nodded and continued talking regarding my future with the Exchange.

"You know, Canderous was right. The Exchange is always looking for new talent. You could have a bright future with our organization."

"I also didn't realize you were a swoop fan."

"A casual fan at best, bet everyone on Taris follows the big season opener. But we have more important issues to discuss now. With a recommendation from Canderous – and a thorough background check – you could become part of the Exchange. Many would kill to prove themselves worthy of this honor."

I nodded. "Sounds promising, your offer intrigues me, Davik."

"Come with me – I will give you a tour of my operations. I'm certain you'll be most impressed."

We walked around Davik's extensive estate; I was kind of bored with the place. I tried not to look bored but my boredom fled when he opened up his hanger and showed his ship.

"Ah, there she is – the __Ebon Hawk__. My pride and joy; the fastest ship in the Outer Rim! Note the state-of-the-art security system I've had installed to protect her. The shields are completely impregnable. Nobody can get past them without the codes to try and steal my baby. Unfortunately, the Sith military blockade has grounded my vessel. The _Ebon Hawk_ can outrun any vessel in the galaxy, but even she isn't fast enough to avoid the auto-targeting laser cannons of the orbiting Sith fleet. I am, of course, working on acquiring the Sith departure codes so that I may come and go as I please. However, progress has been slow… but we should continue our tour."

I gave a low whistle. "Impressive ship." My eyes hungered over the ship; I knew a good ship when I saw it. It made me miss my own ship _, Starlight and Moonbeam_.

We finally ended up in a long line of rooms in Davik's guest wing, "These will be your accommodations. The slave quarters are just down the hall. If you need anything during your stay – food, a massage – feel free to call upon their services. If all goes well with your background check you will be invited to join the Exchange. I'd advise you to accept the offer when it comes – or suffer the dire consequences of refusal."

Dire consequences? Geeze what did Canderous get me involved in? I smiled softly and said. "I'm looking forward to working with you, Davik."

"You will stay in these rooms as my guest for the next few days; I will not accept no for an answer. Feel free to visit the slave quarters at any time during your stay. I must warn you that if you are found anywhere outside the guest wing during your stay – or if you bother my other guests – my security forces will deal with you most harshly. I will return after the investigation into your background is complete. Until then, make yourself comfortable. Come, Calo, let us leave our guests in peace."

Canderous spoke up after Davik and Calo exited. "Okay we're inside. Now all we have to do is figure out a way to get past the _Ebon Hawk's_ security system and we can get the rest of your group and get off this planet! No sense waiting around here, though. The sooner we get off Taris the better."

* * *

 **~Calo Nord~**

"I am telling you, Davik that woman isn't who she's supposed to be?" We were walking back to the main throne room.

Davik turned to me. "What do you mean, Calo?"

"Her name isn't Phoenix Star."

Davik laughed. "So she's under an assumed name. It wouldn't be the first time that a person came to me under a different name. A lot of the people who come to work for the Exchange have something to hide."

"That maybe, Davik. But her name isn't Phoenix Star."

"And how do you know that Calo?"

I paused a moment and then spoke. "I killed Phoenix Star."

Davik raised an eyebrow. "You what?"

"That's right, I killed her. It was during the Mandalorian Wars, about three or four years ago. She was a smuggler, who smuggled guns to various Outer Rim planets and territories. She angered a lot of people, the Mandalorians for one; she hadn't paid her bills on a load of weapons, so someone put a bounty on her head. I took it."

"You've killed a lot of people, Calo. Are you sure you're not mistaken?"

I sighed and removed my goggles. "Not that woman. She left a scar down my left eye with a vibroblade. I never forgot her. She fought like a kinrath. She was the only person who put up quite a bit of a challenge against me." I quickly put my goggles back on.

Davik seemed intrigued. "I see. Well Calo, I suppose her background check will have to be a bit more unorthodox than most. I seriously doubt she will say who she truly is. So it's up to you to find out who she really is."

I smiled. "Of course,"

Davik walked away from the hallways. I needed a genetic sample from the woman and I grinned, as I took off my glove. I had shaken hands with the woman for that very reason and all I needed to do was run the skin sample test off of my glove.

I walked to Davik's lab in his estate. I scanned my glove into the data base looking for a genetic sample that matched. I found two matches in the galactic database, one came from the Republic's genetic database, and the other came from the local Taris genetic directory. The Republic database was useless, as always. The genetic material identified her as Phoenix Star. I shook my head that was worthless. However the local Taris database wasn't run by the Republic, it was run by the Sith. The file was heavily encrypted and classified, it took some time but I managed to slice into the records so I could take a look at the genetic match and frowned, impossible. I had always thought…the holos and official histories labeled them a man. I did a double check at the results. My eyes went wide; I had shaken hands with Darth Revan. The woman who called herself Phoenix Star, was the Dark Lord of the Sith.

Yet, why was she here and that cousin of hers. Her speech was too Courscanti in tone. My goggles had a duel function it collected images and video of people, and I searched the nets with the image I had. Bastila Shan, Jedi padawan. I smiled. So Revan had turned against the Sith, probably because her apprentice had usurped her position. The Jedi Shan according to the nets had lead a strike team against Revan and now Revan and Bastila Shan were hand in hand together. Then there was the man, my goggles did another search on his image and it brought up the famous Republic pilot and captain, Carth Onasi. This was getting really interesting to say the least.

Yet, Wasn't the Dark Lord supposed to be dead? It had been news on the holos for days on end. So the holos were a lie. Revan was alive. Yet, most people knew how cunning this fallen Jedi had been. Revan was a master at misdirection and lies, one of them now being herself. Perhaps, her reported death had been another attempt at misdirection. This threw a whole new wrinkle. I could tell Davik but what would the Exchange do with the information? Knowing Davik, he would probably side with Revan. Yet, in all seriousness with Malak usurping her position, Revan really had nothing to offer the Exchange. However, knowing Revan, she would undoubtedly lie. It still left one big question how did the Jedi and Republic fit into this? Perhaps, Revan only agreed to work with the Jedi and the Republic if they helped her bring down Malak. That was possible. Yet none of these suppositions brought me or the Exchange any benefit. The only ones that would pay well for this info would be Darth Malak and the Sith. I am sure they would be more than interested in this information.

I carefully opened a channel up to the Sith authorities.

I saw the freckled face of a young man in a Sith uniform, he looked green as grass. I groaned inwardly, probably a new recruit. Although this could work to my advantage, I could probably bully him and get what I wanted. I glared at him. "I demand to speak to Lord Malak…."

He stared at me gobsmacked. "But….but….sir….no one speaks to Lord Malak, not without the proper introductions and formalities."

"Then prepare the proper introductions and formalities, I am Calo Nord and I have information that Lord Malak will pay most handsomely for."

The man's face paled. Ah, so he had heard of me. He paused trying to think what he was suppose to do.

I pushed hard at the man. "Well don't just stand there get me in touch with your superior. If that doesn't work I demand to speak with Admiral Saul Karath, himself."

The man sighed. "It will be a few minutes, Sir….ummm Mr. Calo Nord, Sir…."

I retorted. "Don't take too long….and tell your superior that this has to deal with Darth Revan and that I know that **_she_ ** is alive."

The man frowned. "Surely you are mistaken….Lord Revan is dead. Lord Malak killed him."

"Don't play me a fool, you snot nosed brat. Lord Revan is a woman and **she** is very much alive."

The soldier suddenly recovered his nerve. "I am Ensign Roya Yan. Don't you dare call me a snot nosed brat, I could have my commander, Commander Zhan set up a bounty against you, Calo Nord."

I laughed. "So the mouse does have a voice after all. If that's what it takes to get your commanding officer to react, I'll call you a snot nosed brat any day."

The ensign snorted. "I could easily….cut off this communication, Calo Nord….and claim you are a mad man, everyone knows that Revan is dead and that Revan was a man. Yet….I suppose I could make this worth your while...if…."

I groaned, I had pushed too hard. So this was how the Sith worked, if threats didn't work, then bribery. I sighed. "How much?"

He grinned. "Two thousand credits and a few bottles of Tarisian Ale."

"Tarisian Ale….I can't promise that right off. The credits I could transfer to your personal account immediately.

The ensign grinned. "Okay, nix the Tarisian ale and give me the credits."

I quietly opened up my own private accounts on Coruscant and I stated. "My account is open."

The ensign smiled and I watched as he clicked a few buttons on his console. "My account is open, you can transfer payment now, Calo Nord."

I grumbled a bit and transferred the payment over to this snot nosed brat. He grinned. "Pleasure doing business with you, Calo Nord. Now….to get you in touch with my commander…."

I coughed. "For two thousand credits. I expect no one but Admiral Karath."

The ensign smirked. "That's the trick isn't it? Admiral Saul Karath is a very busy man, but he was very fond of Lord Revan, at least that is the rumor, I heard. But it will take some time. Give me at least an hour. Can we contact you through this line?"

I nodded and said. "Be quick. I can't guarantee how long I can keep Lord Revan here. She is also working with your enemies Jedi Bastila Shan and Republic Fleet Captain Carth Onasi."

The ensign laughed. "I still find your news amusing. It's a good thing Lord Revan isn't alive, he'd kill you for stating that he is a woman."

* * *

 **~Saul Karath~**

Alive!

Revan was alive! At least that was what Commander Zhan had claimed from one of his snot nosed ensigns. I would have disregarded the intell and claimed it was bunk except that the ensign had stated that the bounty hunter claimed that Revan was a woman and a she. I laughed, it was the first laugh I had laughed in a long time. I had to retrieve my empress. The question was how? If Malak found out that his old Master was alive. He'd kill her or worse. However, the intell distressed me even more, the alarming news that Lord Revan had betrayed the Sith and was willingly working with the Jedi and the Republic. Yet, if I were in her position, I couldn't blame her. Malak had tried to kill her. Her options at this time were few. She would have to tread carefully and rebuild her power base. If only I could…join her, I would do so gladly. However, how could I? I signed forlornly, I was stuck under Malak's thumb. Think, Saul, think. There were a few Dark Jedi I knew that had come from Malachor V in Revan's personal academy. She had seen to their breaking personally and hid them away from Malak. She had them transferred to my flagship and had put them in stasis. For all they were aware of, they still believed Revan was still the Dark Lord of the Sith. Revan had told me that they were hers and mine personal guard. These Dark Jedi had been the best of the Jedi, and Revan had wanted them.

Revan loved breaking Jedi. She seemed to relish with a demented pleasure breaking Jedi to the Dark Side. Yet, she made sure that their loyalty was to her and to me, and not to Malak. Perhaps Revan sensed the danger Malak posed. She kept them in stasis and said to me, do not use them unless our need is great. Well the need was great. I had need of them. They were rogues, they would serve in a pinch to retrieve Revan and begin an action against Malak.

I had to find someone to help retrieve her. Yet, I suppose I needed to contact the bounty hunter. I used the transmission code the ensign had used earlier and opened a channel to the bounty hunter.

The bounty hunter smiled."Admiral?"

I nodded.

He grinned. "I didn't think you would contact me. I guess my news intrigued you."

"It has…..bounty hunter."

"It's Calo Nord, Admiral Karath."

"Ahh….Calo. I am familiar with you. You were quite helpful during the Mandalorian wars, you eliminated some rather bothersome enemies to Lord Revan."

* * *

 **~Calo Nord~**

"You can stop dispensing the pleasantries, Admiral. I am sure you want me to kill Revan, and the Republic soldier, and retrieve Bastila."

The admiral's eyes glared at me. "No….I don't wish you to kill Revan or Bastila. I want you to retrieve them and take them to a specific location. As for Carth Onasi, I wish…." He paused, "I don't wish him dead either. I rather deal with him alive. So I wish you to disable them and take them alive to…." the admiral pushed a few buttons and transmitted a location. I raised an eye at the location. Malachor V. Was he crazy? That planet was a graveyard. Or was it? And why was the Admiral doing this? It did not sound like the admiral was fully loyal to Malak. This was rather interesting.

I raised an eyebrow, "Admiral you want me to retrieve two powerful Force users along with a useless Republic officer, not kill them and deliver them to you on a graveyard planet. You are crazy and demented admiral. Lord Revan could kill me as well as Bastila. Forget it."

The admiral shook his head, "I did not intend to have you complete this objective on your own, Calo Nord. I will be sending you help."

I frowned. "Oh, and I hope that you don't intend to send some useless Sith grunts, like that pathetic ensign that I dealt with earlier."

The admiral laughed. "Of course not. I will be sending two of Revan's loyal Dark Jedi guard to help you. You must admit them to your location though."

"That won't be easy, Davik doesn't like strangers, but I suppose I could tell Davik they are new recruits to the Exchange. If…." I paused in thought, if Canderous could recruit supporters to Davik and the Exchange then so could I.

"You are in good fortune that Davik recently opened up his estate to new recruits. I will meet your agents in the Lower City. What are their names?"

The Admiral look down at his console, "Their names are Omni Khan and Rama Yaktal. Omni, he is Echani and Rama, she is human. They are very capable, Dark Jedi. Whatever you do, Calo Nord, do not piss them off, Dark Jedi forge there own path and they will deal with you directly if you show any form of betrayal to them.

I snorted. "I will meet them soon. "

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"Welcome to the slave quarters, mistress. Here we have succulent fruits and berries to tempt your palette, as well as luxurious baths to soothe your aches and pains."

Canderous chuckled,"Heh. Now this is my kind of place! "

"Would you like a relaxing massage, mistress?"

My eyes lit up although I could see frowns on Bastila's and Carth's faces. "Oh you two are no fun. I need a massage, all that we've been through and my back has been killing me. I have to have at least quite a few knots in my back."

Bastila shook her head, "You are such a bad liar, Phoenix."

I frowned, "Why would I lie about that? I do have knots in my back, I honestly do. Now if you don't want a massage, be a good little Jedi and go outside. Care to join me in a massage, Carth?"

Carth shook his head, "This seems like a waste of time, Phoenix."

I grinned a bit, "Not really, these slaves are useful, they are as about as useful as a good cup of Tarisian ale in the Vulkar's base."

Carth's eyebrow raised, he must have remembered the last time he saw that my manner had made a difference in our mission. He sighed and shook his head. "I'll be outside with, Bastila. Don't take too long." They both left the chamber leaving me with Canderous.

He chuckled, "Tell me Phoenix now that Bastila is gone, about that fight with Bendak. Also why is Bastila able to get away with so much with you these days?"

"Well Canderous, that's complicated. I did honestly feel afraid during that fight. Bendak had me at his mercy. A sonic grenade knocked me pretty much out of commission. I decided the only way I could survive was play dead. He thought I was dead anyway and so did most of the crowd. Anyway, I remembered the blaster I had and the next thing I did was pull it out and fired. He didn't know what hit him because all my previous victories were with a blade. You know how, you Mandalorians are, study your enemy so you can better defeat them."

He nodded, "Very astute, Phoenix. So about Bastila and you?"

I sighed, "I am not sure how you feel about Jedi, Canderous, I doubt you are very much fond of them."

He snorted, "I only cared for one Jedi and that was the Jedi Revan. The rest of the Jedi, hid themselves away from the realities of the war in an ivory tower, cowards every one of them, except for Revan and Malak. Why are you bringing this up?"

I paused a moment and then said to Canderous, "I am Force sensitive, Canderous. I can't deny what I am. Bastila is the only chance I may have to get training to use the Force. I can't risk alienating her."

He nodded, "I see. Well don't let her stomp you down too far, Phoenix. You have a good deal of potential as a warrior. I would hate to see that wasted by having you become a Jedi nun."

I chuckled a bit, "Me a nun, never….."

I turned towards the slave as did Canderous and we both asked for a massages.

"You will find this most relaxing. If you would come with me into the massage room at the back…"

I followed the male slave to the back room where I striped down and he proceeded to rub and pound the knots out of my back. How the frack, Bastila thought I was lying about those damn knots, I would never know. I had been on edge since being on the 'Spire, and then the duel challenges, plus rescuing her. I sighed as the slave served me a cup of wine and berries mixed together.

"How does that feel mistress?"

I moaned a bit, "So much better, you are truly gifted at your art. Give me another one."

"I will do my best to sate your prodigious appetite with another massage, mistress."

The next thing I remembered was the slave waking me up, I must have fallen asleep, and I blushed turning a deep shade of red.

"I trust you were satisfied with the service? I have received many compliments on my skills from previous clients."

"It was wonderful…."

I quietly stood and put my clothing back on.

"Thank you, my lady. I hope you will express your appreciation to Davik. He often rewards those slaves who perform their duties well. Is there anything else you require?"

"I need some information."

"But… what could I possibly tell you? It is forbidden for slaves to leave this room on pain of torture and death."

I smiled, "Tell me what I want to know and I'll tell Davik how pleased I was with your performance."

The male twi'lek slave's eyes brightened, "Praise from the guests is a valuable commodity here. Davik rewards the slaves who perform their duties well. I will tell you what I know. Davik rarely lets us leave the slave quarters. We only know what we hear from Davik's guests. Recently they've all been talking about poor Hudrow. He was caught trying to steal some spice from the lab. Normally Hudrow is allowed to get away with things like that because he's Davik's personal pilot for the _Ebon Hawk._ But since the Sith have grounded every ship on the planet, Hudrow doesn't get any more special treatment. They've locked him up in Davik's torture chambers. "

"Torture chamber?"

"I think you can get there through the hall behind the west door of Davik's throne room. Just keep going west from the slave quarters and you'll see the throne room. But Davik's certain to have guards patrolling the area. If you leave the guest wing, they'll shoot you on sight. Please – I don't know anything else."

I nodded, "Thanks so much…."

I went over to Canderous in another room, "Come along, let's get those codes for the Ebon Hawk." He grunted and followed me.

* * *

 **~Omni Khan~**

This was unsettling. I had been asleep for months. The last thing I remember was pledging my support to Lord Revan and her putting me in stasis, months earlier. My muscles groaned with lack of usage and I felt sluggish. I served Revan and her consort Admiral Saul Karath. I laughed more to myself than to Rama, my fellow Force user, this was the first time a Dark Lord had put me under the command of a Force-blind admiral. Yet, I trusted Revan's command, her decisions were like Echani martial arts filled with precision and carefully driven home.

She had open my eyes to my true potential on Malachor V. I had been a Jedi but the power of Malachor V, the Echani martial arts and the Dark Side of the Force, made me reject the Jedi. My eyes were open and my soul was receptive to Revan's message of truth. She taught me to despise the weakness of Jedi and to accept without hesitation the way of the Dark Side. Yet, I admired, the Dark Lord because she respected Echani martial arts. She had told me her first Master was Echani and she had taught her. My admiration for her grew, as she wished to train with me. I would have not thought it possible, but I was honored to have caught the eye of the Dark Lord.

She spent hours training with me. I had been surprised at first that the Dark Lord would personally spend time with me honing her skills in the Echani arts. Yet, it taught me that even Dark Lords needed to train and keep themselves as sharp as a blade. I was disconcerted that the Admiral had told me of Lord Revan's betrayal by her own apprentice. Anger flared within me and I told Saul I wished to gut Malak like a fish. Rama's eyes had a similar flash of anger but she said nothing. Saul shook his head and told me that was up to Revan to do so. So we met in the Lower City. Saul stated, we did not have much time, as Malak was planning to fire bomb the planet. So this was to be a quick mission. Hopefully we would retrieve our Lord and disappear to Malachor V. Saul would join us there and together, we would restore, Lord Revan's proper place to the galaxy.

I saw the bounty hunter. I hissed at him. "Calo Nord?"

He grunted. "About time you've both arrived. I hope that you plan on compensating me for all this trouble."

I glared at the man and the Force flowed through me, the Force crushing his throat. Calo's throat constricted. He coughed, gagged and sputtered. I let go. "Don't test me or Rama's loyalty on this. You will be paid, like the common filth that you are, bounty hunter."

Calo said firmly. "You think to frighten me, Omni Khan. Killing me won't get you any closer to Lord Revan."

I grunted. "Let's get on our way….we don't have much time to extract Lord Revan."

Calo's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

"None of your concern bounty hunter."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I left the slave's quarters to find Bastila looking at me with a sour look. "You took entirely too much time."

"I am sorry, I fell asleep."

"I felt a disturbance in the Force and you fell asleep!?"

"Sithspit, Bastila, I am not a Jedi. I am sorry I fell asleep, I am tired. But I have a lead from Davik's slaves that can help us. Apparently Davik's on the outs with his pilot. He's in a torture room further down. We need to help the guy out. If he's nice, maybe….just maybe we can get the codes for the Hawk."

Carth quickly interjected, "Don't be hard on her, Bastila. We're all tired as it is and we're trying to get off this planet. Let's check this pilot out. Hopefully we can get those codes and get out of here."

Canderous came out of the room and he sighed, "Only thing I am going to miss about Davik's estate are those massages."

We walked out of the guest wing and held our weapons at the ready. Sure enough, we found plenty of guards gunning for us. We quickly dispatched them and ended up in the torture room to see a man suffering in a torture field. I quickly turned off the field and the man stated, "Thank you! You have no idea what it was like in that torture cage. I don't know how much more I could take before going mad."

"I couldn't sit by and just let you suffer."

"I used to be the pilot of the __Ebon Hawk__ – Davik's flagship. I know the codes to disable the security system protecting it. I'll load them into your data pad now. You can use those codes to steal the _Ebon Hawk_ right out of its hangar. Sell it to the highest bidder, ransom it back to Davik – whatever you do you'll make thousands!"

I took a look at the codes and grinned, finally we could get off this planet.

"Okay, you're free to go now."

"It won't be long until Davik figures out I'm free. I have to get out of this base before that happens."

Hudrow bolted out the door and Canderous stated, "We've got what we came for. We should get going. "

* * *

 **~Rama Yaktal~**

I had my doubts about this retrieval of Lord Revan. Admiral Saul Karath wanted us to recover Lord Revan and his emotional center was off kilter. This is what you get when you toy with the emotions of someone like Admiral Saul Karath. Disgusting. Love was a weakness. So Lord Revan had told me, yet she flaunted her own teachings. Yet, who was I to determine what reason Lord Revan had entered into a relationship with the admiral. The admiral clearly was bound deeply to Lord Revan, and perhaps that was what Revan had desired after all. However, I knew betrayal was the way of the Sith and the Dark Side. I had sworn obedience to Lord Revan and Admiral Karath. Yet, it was clearly obvious that Malak was in charge now. This objective was insane. I contemplated informing Malak about Karath's betrayal. However, a sinking feeling filled me if I contacted Malak I would be killed. Omni and I were not suppose to exist. We were a band that existed to serve Lord Revan. We had been hidden from Malak and If Malak heard that we were or had been Dark Jedi in the service of Revan, our death was certain. We were a remnant of Revan's rule and that was enough for Malak not to trust us. Self preservation prevailed over my desire to gain a foothold with Malak. I was made a loyalist to Revan whether I liked it or not.

Omni seemed to be willing to go against Malak, as foolhardy as I felt that was. Omni admired Revan for combat and skill. He was slavishly loyal to her, to the point of his own life. I only was tied to Revan because she had inducted me into her service and I wished to keep my life. Did this make me a coward? Probably, but I wasn't stupid. My time with Lord Revan had taught me one thing, to carefully think my decisions through and to trust my feelings.

As we entered Davik's estate, I used the Force and blanked and messed with Davik's memory. He saw us as members of his pathetic crime syndicate. Calo's eyes went wide, yet he said nothing. I smiled a feral grin at him. Davik would give us free reign. He would forget us as soon as we left. I wish I could have done the same with that damn bounty hunter, but Admiral Karath made us swear that we would not harm him as he was part of the plan of retrieving Bastila and Lord Revan. I could sense Revan's presence but it felt wrong. It seemed muddled, and fuzzy. It did not feel right. What did Malak, the bastard do to her?

I mentioned to Omni. "Omni….this is not right. Revan, her presence is wrong."

He frowned. "What do you mean? Revan is Revan. I can sense her. Her presence is close."

Calo Nord's eyes narrowed. "Wrong….what are babbling about?"

I shrugged. "I could be wrong, bounty hunter, but since you are Force blind, I doubt you would understand."

I turned toward Omni. "Your perceptions are obviously clouded by memory, Omni. I am telling you, Revan is not the same, her presence is off. But enough talk Omni, let's get this over with, we need to retrieve, Revan, Bastila, and the Republic pilot and get off this pathetic planet before Malak blows us all to dust."

Calo Nord's eyes went wide. "What!"

I laughed. "That's right, bounty hunter, so you better come through with your end of the bargain, or Omni and I will leave you here to rot with the rest of the pathetic sentients that live here.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

We went down the hallways, clearing out anymore guards that we found; we finally ended up towards the hanger. I gave Canderous the codes and he opened the door to the hanger.

The room shook and turbo lasers were firing and my eyes went wide, "What the?"

Bastila sighed, "Malak…..he's destroying the planet….because of me."

We headed towards the Ebon Hawk when suddenly we saw Calo and Davik enter the hanger bay. Two robbed figures entered closely behind. Bastila's eyes went wide. "Malak…..he knows we're here!"

I frowned. "What!"

"They're…..they're Dark Jedi."

I groaned." Wonderful Bastila, I thought the Force was with us."

"It is….maybe, just maybe we can escape with the madness of Malak bombing this place."

I frowned. "So if Malak is bombing the place and these Dark Jedi are here…." I scratched my dark black hair, "this doesn't make sense Bastila. There's something off about this."

Bastila looked thoughtful. "You're right, Phoenix."

"Rogue Dark Jedi? Is that even possible?"

"Anything is possible. I'll handle the Dark Jedi, Phoenix. You, Canderous and Carth handle Davik and Calo."

Davik glared at Calo and the Dark Jedi, "Damn these Sith…..they are bombing the planet! I always knew they'd turn on us...sometime."

The Dark Jedi woman and man tried to come towards me but Bastila ignited her blade and fought with them.

Davik hissed, "Theives…..in my hanger….try and steal my ship will you? And leave me here high and dry….I don't think so!"

Calo's eyes turned lustfully towards us but he pointed his blaster right at me, he frowned at me. "I'll take care of them, Davik. I've been looking forward to this for a long time!"

Davik pulled forth his blasters, "Make it quick, the Sith mean business. If we don't get to our ships and find somewhere safe, the bombs they're dropping will kill us all."

* * *

 **~Rama Yaktal~**

I fought with Bastila. I smiled. "So it's the little Jedi pet, Bastila Shan. I remember you, Bastila. I don't know if you remember me?"

Bastila fought me and Omni and she said softly, "You were going to be a knight….Rama. The Order sent you on a mission, and you were never heard from again. We assumed you were lost. What made you forsake the way of the Jedi?"

I laughed. "A change of heart….and Lord Revan. She made me see my true power. Oh and what is wrong with her? She acts like she doesn't know what's going on. I would think she would be overjoyed to see me and Omni."

Our blades clashed and hissed in the background. I tried to aim for Bastila's legs. Yet, Bastila manage to jump away from my blows. Omni tried to catch her in his blade, and yet, we both seemed to be sluggish and slow. If only we had more time after being in stasis to recover. Sadly, we didn't.

Bastila said firmly. "She has been reclaimed for the light, Rama."

I nearly deadpanned. "What! I don't believe it. She acts like she's Force blind. Tell me the truth Bastila. Why is she running around ignorant of the Force?"

Bastila said firmly, "Maybe you should ask your Lord Malak as to why Revan is the way she is."

I frowned. "He's not my Lord. I serve Lord Revan, that pretender should have been the one to die for betraying his master."

Bastila eyebrow rose. "Loyalty among the Sith? I had no idea….that Sith even had loyalty like that."

Our blades hissed and I said angrily. "I'd be a fool to serve Malak, Bastila Shan. Serving Malak would be signing my death warrant. So I have no choice but to serve, Revan, whether I like it or not. But you didn't answer my question, Bastila….what is wrong with her?"

Bastila snorted. "She barely survived her encounter with Malak…..and you think I am going to tell a Dark Jedi what happened."

I contemplated Bastila's words. Something had happened to the Dark Lord when she had faced Malak. Saul's words didn't help. Yet trying to fight Bastila and getting odd glances at Revan. She looked different, no sign of the power of the Dark Side in her features, and her eyes didn't burn with the power she was suppose to wield. She wore the clothing of a common Force blind person.

"Damn it Bastila….what did you do to her?"

There was no answer. Bastila knew, she knew. I was certain of it.

Our fighting was gaining me and Omni no advantage. I cursed the fact that our skills were weak from months being in stasis. I needed to reach Revan.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I quickly raided the armor from Davik's body as Carth and Canderous brought the Exchange boss down. We now turned our attention to Calo. Calo was using the Dark Jedi as a shield. He laughed as he came forward toward me in a mocking tone. "Fight me….Phoenix Star….if you dare. Use the Force!

I frowned. "What!"

He laughed. "I don't believe this. You can't even use the Force! What's wrong with you?"

Uhh...what was he talking about? I raised an eyebrow. So he knew I had the Force, but I couldn't use it. I didn't even know how I subconsciously was using it, let alone use it to attack Calo Nord.

I held up my Echani blade ready to fight him. The building shook and a piece of the ceiling collapsed on Calo and the two Dark Jedi, burying them. Bastila, was almost caught in the damage, but she managed to crawl out of the rubble. Her body glowed as the Force quickly healed her body and she stated firmly. "Let's get out of here."

Canderous nodded, "Let's get this ship fired up. We'll pick up the rest of your friends and then we have to get off this planet! "

* * *

 **~Malak~**

I watched as the bombardment occurred and I breathed in wonder, the power the energy of destruction filled my very being.

I heard Admrial Karath's words, "Taris is defenseless against our assault, Lord Malak. They are offering no resistance. The city is in ruins.

"Resume the bombardment, Commander. Wipe this pathetic planet from the face of the galaxy."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I felt my heart choke up in my heart, the planet was burning, all this to capture me. We picked up Mission, Zaalbar and the droid. Mission cowered in a bunk room, she was crying. This planet may not of have been much but it had been her home.

Zaalbar sat with her and hugged her letting the Twi'lek cry into his fur.

I went to the cockpit and barked out an order to Carth who was piloting the ship. "Plot a course for Dantooine! There's a Jedi enclave there where we can find refuge!"

The proximity alarm began to ring off and Carth stated, "Incoming fighters."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Bastila turned toward me, "We have to hold the Sith off….get to the gun turrets so we can get those hyperspace coordinates punched in."

I ran down the hallway and went and found Canderous, "Come on Mandalorian….let's see how hot you are on the turrets."

He snorted and he followed me and we both proceeded to climb into the turrets and we started laying a defense against the Sith fighters. The last two fighters destroyed between us. I felt the ship lurch forward into hyperspace and I breathed a sigh of relief. We had escaped Taris but at what cost? I promptly went to the refresher and threw up.

Bastila came in and found me retching she sighed, "I am feeling similar, Phoenix."

I looked at Bastila, "What kind of people would do such a thing? All those people, gone….."

My stomach still rebelled against me and I continued to hurl and the next thing I knew was Bastila embracing me in her arms. It seemed to settle my stomach and we both cried at the lost of Taris.

* * *

 **o-0-o**

 _A/N: End of Taris…._

 _Okay yea, I am pretty sure there are going to be some people are going to say Saul and Revan. Gag me with a spoon. I am just going for a different dynamic with the storyline. It will make everything on the Leviathan interesting. Anyway onto some interesting moments on Dantooine and Malak finding out that Revan is alive…._


	27. Chapter 26: Dantooine: Sanctuary

**Chapter 26: Dantooine: Sanctuary**

 **~Phoenix~**

The Ebon Hawk landed on Dantooine and I had spent some time looking over our "new" ship. Davik had stocked the ship pretty well. I grinned as I found what looked to be a bar with various bottles of liquor. I grabbed the Corellian brandy and opened it up and took a swig only to find Bastila staring at me. I watched in horror as she grabbed the bottles from the bar and opened them up and started pouring them out into the refresher.

"It's time you started acting more like a Jedi and less like a boozed up smuggler," She stated firmly.

"But…..."I took another swig of brandy.

"It's a crutch, Phoenix. A true Jedi does not need to rely on any sort of artificial substance within their body."

"But I am not a Jedi…..at least not..."

"How can I explain you or recommend you to the council for training, if you reek like every known liquor in the universe?"

She took the bottle of brandy from my hands and started pouring it out. "Frack….it all!" I said angrily and went into the hallway. I was in a sour mood and bumped into Canderous, "What's up kid?"

"Bastila, that's what's up. She's taking away what makes me human; she dumped out all of Davik's bar stock."

Canderous laughed, "I warned you about the Jedi, didn't I?"

I sighed, "Yea, you did. But I didn't sign up for that!" I looked at Canderous, "I tell you that isn't natural. No alcohol, what's next! No meat?"

I heard a cough and found Bastila behind me, "You would be correct about that, Phoenix. To be a Jedi means the serious commitment to the Force and to not harm any sentient life, many Jedi commit to not to take the life of any animal. The meals at the Temple on Coruscant and the Dantooine enclave are meatless. It isn't mandatory to forgo meat to be a Jedi but most Jedi commit to that form of diet."

I looked at Canderous, a look of remorse on my face, and he laughed. "I told you, Phoenix you are going to be a nun."

Bastila glared at Canderous, "We are not nuns or monks, Mandalorian. We are Jedi."

Canderous shook his head, "You're a religious order, are you not? Nuns and monks are found in most religious orders so….I call it like I see it. And Bastila….I heard that the Vulkars captured you without much of a struggle. It must have been embarrassing to be bested by a handful of street thugs."

"There were extenuating circumstances and I can assure you it took far more than a handful of Vulkars to subdue me."

I was in a bad mood and decided to humor Canderous, rather than try and defend Bastila, "Oh yea, there had to be twenty of them….no wait...fifty...no maybe a hundred of them."

Canderous laughed a bit at my disgruntled humor, "All I know is that if we had more Jedi like Bastila fighting against us in the Mandalorian Wars, my side might not have lost."

Bastila snorted, "Bold talk from a broken down mercenary who was serving at Davik's heel. I'd call you his pet Kath hound, but they have enough loyalty not to turn on their masters."

"Insults? Maybe if your Master had trained your lightsaber to be as quick as your tongue you could have escaped those Vulkars, you spoiled little Jedi Princess!"

Bastila glared at Canderous, "I was not spoiled, I was given the same training as everyone in the Order! You are nothing but a..."

Bastila suddenly breathed quietly and calmly and then said, "No, I must not do this. There is no emotion; there is peace…."

Canderous snorted, "That's the problem with you Jedi. Always chanting about peace and control, never up to for a good fight. Well, except for Revan, I guess. "

Bastila said firmly, "Enough Mandalorian. I won't rise to your bait any more. The game is over!"

She looked at me, "Come up to the cockpit, I need to talk to you and Carth."

She walked off and I sighed, "Thanks, Canderous…."

He laughed, "No problem, Phoenix, she needed to be taken down a notch or two." He then took a flask from his side and took a drink from it and handed it to me, "And if you ever need a drink come see me, I'll give you whatever I have."

I took a deep swig of it and coughed, "Damn this is strong. Leave it to Mandalorians to have something even stronger than Tarisian Ale." I handed the flask back to him, "Thanks Canderous. Anyway, I better go see what Bastila wants."

Canderous laughed, "Good luck, Phoenix, and I hope you don't become another mindless Jedi clone stating platitudes about peace and serenity."

I chuckled, "I can assure you, I won't."

Canderous sighed, "I hope you are right kid…."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I was getting exasperated with Phoenix, why she even insisted upon drinking was beyond me? Did the Jedi Masters even realize what sort of memories and personality they had given Revan? How was Revan supposed to stay on the path of the light when every moment she seemed to need some form of correction or admonishment? I felt like the Masters had put me with a child that had to be watched constantly. I definitely needed to talk to the Masters regarding this.

Phoenix came up to the cockpit and Carth smiled at her, "Hey gorgeous, how you doing? I heard you had a rough night last night."

She sighed, "Yea….I don't stomach mass murder all that well."

Yet other times, Phoenix seemed to be a noble woman with a sense of loyalty and goodness. However, she was very stubborn and headstrong. Was that Revan or was that Phoenix? I wasn't really sure.

I looked at Carth and Phoenix, "Dantooine... it seems like a lifetime since I last set foot on her surface, though in truth it has only been a few months. We should be safe from Malak here... for now, at least.

Carth looked incredulous, "Safe? You saw what his fleet did to Taris: there wasn't a building over two stories high left standing! They... they turned the planet into one big pile of rubble."

"Yet, even the Sith would think twice before attacking Dantooine. There are many Jedi here, including several of the most powerful Masters of the Order. There is great strength within this place."

Phoenix snorted, "Spiritual resolve and strength is all fine and good Bastila but this planet doesn't look like it could handle orbital bombardment. I agree with Carth, we should move on."

I shook my head, "And where do you suggest we go, Phoenix? No matter where we go, Malak will be hunting for me. Besides, we can get supplies here and recuperate. The Academy is a place of mental and spiritual healing; something we could all use after what we've been through."

Phoenix sighed, "I suppose you're right. I do feel….after all that…." she sighed, "I feel so empty and numb inside, like someone kicked me in the gut. I haven't exactly felt much peace after all that."

I gave phoenix a slight hug, I felt like she needed it, part of me wanted her to be a Jedi; I wanted to call her sister even though she was the most exasperating person I had ever come across.

Carth looked thoughtful and then spoke, "Alright Bastila, I suppose we do need some time to recover from all that. It isn't easy to witness the annihilation of an entire planet. I know Mission must be taking it pretty hard."

I remembered when I had picked up Mission from our hideout on Taris as the Sith bombarded the planet. She managed to get on board the Hawk with little fanfare with Zaalbar and T3. Yet when we had managed to get her settled in she cried her eyes out. I sighed, "She will find a way to come to terms with her grief. She is stronger than she appears. We just need to give her time. Now I must go speak with the Council. I need their advice on... recent developments. After I have met with them I will meet with you."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I watched as Bastila left the Hawk. I turned to Carth and he sighed, "No offense, Phoenix but I kind of need some privacy. I have some communications I need to send to the fleet and my superiors."

I nodded and went and found Canderous, he was busy polishing Davik's armor I had taken as a prize. I offered it to him and he accepted it. He was also busy polishing up his blaster rifle and making sure the targeting was correct. I could tell he was busy. I sighed and found T3. "Hey T3, are you busy?"

He beeped,::Yes, I am working on upgrading our efficiency on weaponry and shields. Just in case we run into the Sith again.::

I frowned, "Have you talked to Carth about that?"

::No. Carth dislikes me.::

I laughed, "He doesn't dislike you but I would advise talking to him before you start any projects on this ship or he might decide he actually does dislike you and then decides he needs to memory wipe you."

"Dwooooo"

I patted the droid on the top of his dome, "Don't worry, if Carth does talk about wiping your memory. He'll have to deal with me."

:: You are a unique, sentient, Phoenix. You treat me like a humanoid.::

I chuckled and then said, "That's because I know you are more than just the sum of your parts and programming. I wouldn't worry about Carth or Bastila. They'll come around to like you. Just give them some time."

T3 wheeled off looking for a task to complete around the ship. I walked around trying to find someone to talk to, I felt a bit...well alone. I finally found Zaalbar near the food dispenser in a small dining area, He moaned, "The food synthesizer is malfunctioning."

I took a bowl and turn on the synthesizer to serve myself some of the food from it. What came out of the synthesizer was an unappetizing gray sort of porridge with what looked to be white gelatinous chunks. I took a taste of it and nearly gagged and spat it out, "Damn that's horrible. It tastes like rancor spit."

I yelled out, "T3….."

The droid came rolling into the room beeping, ::Yes, Phoenix.::

"You want to make yourself useful. Try and figure out what the frack is going on with the food dispenser."

The droid beeped and went over and proceeded to tap into the dispenser computer. I sighed, "Leave it to Davik to not properly maintain his food synthesizer."

I sighed and put the uneaten bowl of porridge in the kitchen fresher. "Bleck…..I think I owe you a meal, Zaalbar. You and Mission."

Zaalbar barked with delight, "That sounds wonderful, Phoenix Star."

I nodded, "How's Mission doing by the way?"

Zaalbar moaned, "She will heal, healing will come like the clear winds that blow through the wroshyr trees of my home."

"Let's go get her and grab a bite to eat. I am sure the Jedi can spare the three of us a good warm and decent meal. Besides my mother always said, a good warm meal can heal the soul as well as fill the stomach."

"Your mother was a wise woman, Phoenix Star."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I transmitted a request to talk to Admiral Dodonna, I made sure to encrypt the message. The request to talk to her came back almost immediately.

Her image appeared on a small screen in the cockpit, "Carth, when we heard what happened to the Endar Spire and to Taris, we feared the worse."

I chuckled lightly, "It takes more than a Sith armada and an orbital bombardment to take Carth Onasi down."

The Admiral smiled, "It's good to hear your voice, Carth. I know you got my communiqué about the Jedi, have you noticed anything suspicious?"

I sighed, "Maybe. I am not really sure. I crashed on Taris with this smuggler. Nice woman really, a bit rough around the edges but she was a big help when we had to rescue Bastila. Anyway, there's something odd about her. "

"Odd, What do you mean, Carth?"

"Well…. She was added at the last minute for one. She was the only person added to the crew that had any sort of useful military translatable skills. She was added by the Jedi. Plus….she's Force sensitive. I don't know what it is about this woman, there's just something about her that seems….well… off and not right about her. I've tried to ignore it but everything is screaming inside of me that there's something wrong about her."

Dodonna nodded, "You know very well Carth, I can't base accusations on gut feelings. Maybe the Jedi can do so but all of us regular folks don't have that luxury."

I sighed, "I know Admiral. I know, I'd just like it if you could run a military grade check on her, If nothing else it will settle my nerves about her."

"I see, and what is the name of this woman you wish to put under deeper scrutiny?"

I sighed, I felt a bit guilty about this, Phoenix really didn't deserve this, but I had to do this if nothing else, I had to do it to put to rest any sort of reservations I had about her.

"Her name is Phoenix Star, Admiral. From what I've learned about her she was born on Deralia. Her family were merchants and farmers that sold wine."

Admiral Dodonna raised an eyebrow, "Carth this seems highly irregular to put an Outlier under such scrutiny."

"I know Admiral, but hear me out. She was under Bastila's command when they came aboard the Endar Spire. You told me whatever the Jedi were plotting had something to do with Bastila. Plus from what I've learned from Bastila, the Jedi maybe planning to train her. From what I understand of the Jedi they don't normally train adults. Isn't that odd enough to check her out."

Dodonna sighed, "Alright Carth, I'll put in a military grade background check on this smuggler of yours. But if you're wrong about this Carth…."

"I know….I am putting my whole military career at risk doing such a thing but..." I sighed, "I feel strongly enough about this Admiral to take the risk."

"Very well, Carth. If you come up with any more information regarding her, let me know."

"Thank you Admiral."

"May the Force be with you, Carth."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"Masters, I can't do this anymore. She's driving me nuts, every base and primal emotion coming from that woman. It overwhelms me. Please send me to Coruscant. Please send me far away from her so the bond will break."

I stood in the council's circle, an open space in the middle of the Enclave. I could hear birds singing and the peaceful whisper of chimes in the background. Normally I would have felt calm and peaceful talking to the Masters, but today I felt very little peace. I felt more rattled than anything; it was probably due to the destruction of Taris.

Master Vandar spoke, his green ears flattened some and he gave a long painful sigh, "Then Malak has already won. You were our last hope for the Republic."

My shoulders slumped, I suddenly felt ashamed. I sighed and took a few measured breaths, "Her memories are supposed to make her loyal to the Republic. Yet….she is erratic, she doesn't do what I say and she fights me at every turn."

Vandar smiled softly, "Would you wish that we gave Revan memories and a personality that would take away Revan's free will, Bastila?"

"No….that would be wrong and of the…."

"The Dark Side," Master Vandar said calmly finishing my sentence.

Vrook sighed, "Revan was always a powerful and dominating individual, Bastila. You must accept that."

I breathed quietly and then finally composing myself, "She wishes to become a Jedi, Masters."

Vrook's face scowled, "Oh she does, does she? And if we train her, how do we know the Dark Lord won't return?"

Dorak sighed, "We don't Master Vrook. It is the risk we took in reprogramming Revan's mind. Bastila was the one who selected the identity for Revan. Apparently, the identity seems to be performing as it should." Dorak smiled softly, "I told you Bastila, that a smuggler was not the best choice for Revan, but you seemed confident that the memories and background were a perfect fit for Revan."

I sighed; I realized that I was in some small way responsible for Phoenix's overall personality and memory construct. I realized I was simply going to have to endure what I had created.

Master Zhar spoke up, "We cannot ignore, Revan's blooming abilities, Masters. If we do not train her, where will she go? The Jedi are not the only teachers of the Force, as you all are aware. We cannot risk, Revan going to the Sith to learn the ways of the Force. We would only be dealing with the Dark Lord once again, if she went to the Sith to learn their teachings. We must acknowledge that we are dealing with a unique situation."

Vandar nodded, "It is a deeply troubling situation we are in Masters. I have felt Revan's presence as Bastila and her group arrived. If I can feel her, then surely Malak will soon be able to feel her as well. We cannot hide her forever. The more we discuss this and deliberate over whether or not to consider her for training the more her strength in the Force grows. We should bring her here and see what Phoenix Star is like."

Vrook sighed, "Very well….. I have a bad feeling about this but since we have not agreed to train her I suppose it cannot hurt to see this woman and see who and what she is. Although I have one question for you Bastila, what do you overall sense and feel from Phoenix Star?"

I paused and thought if over and then spoke "She seems overall a good woman, willing to help others, her spirit seems wholesome enough. However, there is a slight dark taint about her. It lurks in the shadows of her mind. I am not even sure if Phoenix is even aware of it."

Vrook snorted, "Dark taint….Masters, this is what we fear. We shouldn't train this woman at all."

Vandar shook his head, "Peace, Master Vrook. What Bastila is describing is more than likely what little that is left of Revan's mind. Yet, we need whatever is left of the Dark Lord's mind to help us."

Dorak nodded, "We must seek out the knowledge that lays dormant in Revan's mind. We must know where the Sith are getting the bulk of their fleet. So we are back once again to the fact that we need to see her and take account of her."

Vandar nodded, "Bastila go fetch her, tell her we wish to see her."

I nodded and bowed before the Masters, "As you wish…."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Zaalbar yanked the fourteen year old from the bunk and told her to get dressed.

Mission cursed and the wookiee cringed a bit and I decided I needed to do something to get this poor twi'lek up and moving. I grinned a bit, "Really….such language from a child!"

Mission snorted, "I am not a child…."

I leaned against the doorway of the bunk room, "The way you're acting lately it's kind of hard to tell."

Mission plopped once more down on the bunk.

"Come on, Nix….leave me alone. Let me sleep, okay."

"Ummm. Nope."

I sat on the bunk beside her, "Look, I can totally understand how you're feeling. I felt the same way when I lost my family. I didn't want to live. I wanted to sleep my life away but….the universe still is moving, still is flowing around you. Suns move around planets, plants still grow, and you're still breathing."

"I still can't believe it's gone! I mean, I grew up there and now it's… it's just gone!"

"And Malak will pay for this, Mission." The anger suddenly creeping into my voice.

"Yeah… I know. The Jedi got rid of Revan, so I figure Malak's days are numbered, too. But that doesn't make the pain go away, you know?"

I sighed, "No, but with time it fades a little. I've heard a few say that life is pain and…." I paused, "They are right, it is pain but it is how you deal with that pain, how it molds you, how it shapes you."

I paused, I felt something different in my words, something that stirred within me with power and authority. The words, they didn't feel like words I should be speaking and I wasn't exactly sure where they came from. However, they came deep from within me, from a place that I didn't know existed.

"Don't let it swallow you, Mish. You are stronger than the pain and stronger than death. That strength gives you power and victory. You are stronger than Malak, stronger than what he did to Taris. Laying here in agony empowers him; it gives him the power to conquer the universe. Don't give him anymore power, anymore strength. Deny it to him, cut off his power over you. Make yourself, the master over him, you will find yourself defying what the Sith wanted in the end. Your strength, your power, it is more than a match for the pain that Malak has inflicted and it will set you free."

Mission nodded, "Iit's a shock, you know? I mean, I knew the Sith were evil and all, but the reality of it kind of slaps you in the face. But I suppose that's why we need to stop Malak, right? The more time I spend dwelling on Taris the more chance some other planet will get wiped out. I guess that's what it comes down to. So don't worry about me; I'll be okay. And if you need my help against Malak or the Sith, I'll be there for you! "

She gave me a hug and I smiled. "Come on Mish, let's go get something to eat."

 **-0o0-**

The planet of Dantooine seemed nice; it smelled like fresh dug earth and of plants. No wonder, Bastila liked this place. It seemed calm and peaceful. Mission and Zaalbar walked with me through the entrance of the enclave. We came to what looked like a meditation wheel and a garden. I stood watching a young girl with a seed in her hand, she was in full concentration. I watch in amazement as the seed suddenly blossomed in the young girl's hand. I hadn't seen the Force like that in such a manner. It wasn't like that Sith governor back on Taris. This seemed much more benign and in fact beautiful in itself.

I sighed slightly lost in myself admiring the Jedi girl, when suddenly I heard a woman almost yell at me. "You there! Padawan! Why are you not wearing the customary robes of the Jedi? Do you mock the honored traditions of our Order?"

"Huh?"

Mission chuckled lightly, "Gee, Nix, did you fall asleep?"

I screwed up my face, "Are you a Jedi?"

"My name is Belaya. I have come here to further my learning in the ways of the Force. Many Jedi come here to train under Master Zhar. Any who belong to the Order should surely know this. You must be neglecting your studies, Padawan."

I shook my head, "You are mistaken, I am not a padawan. My name is Phoenix Star, I came here with Bastila."

"Bastila? I have heard of her. They say she has already mastered the art of Battle Meditation, remarkable in one so young. Though I have heard she has a foolish pride in her own talents. But as for you... you claim you are not a Padawan? I find this hard to believe. The Force is strong within you. I can feel its presence. If this is some type of jest, it is in very poor taste. The Jedi Order is not a subject for jokes."

"I am not joking. And even if I was, I wouldn't joke about not being a padawan."

"Please forgive the abruptness with which I first greeted you. It was harsh, and perhaps unfair. My Master often warns me I must learn to control my emotions. I see I have much left to learn."

"Anyway Belaya, my companions and I seek nourishment. Where is the cafeteria?"

The woman smiled, "That is down in the sub level of the Enclave. Take the elevator down and you will find the cafeteria. I hope you enjoy the humble fare that we can provide for you. I wish you a pleasant stay on Dantooine, Phoenix Star, and May the Force be with you."

Mission snickered lightly, "Silly Jedi, thinking you're a padawan, what's up with that Nix?"

"Well I know Bastila says I have a strong presence in the Force, but to automatically assume I am a padawan. Geesh! I have got a feeling that I am probably going to get more fuss later on."

We entered the elevator and took it down into the lower level of the Enclave. Zaalbar suddenly moaned, "I smell the food…."

I frowned, "I don't."

Mission laughed, "Yea, leave it to Big Z to know where the grub is and to smell it right through the elevator."

The doors opened, and the lighting of the lower level of the Enclave assaulted my eyes. I couldn't smell food, but I did smell incense. It smelled like sandalwood with slight sweet scents. I suddenly sneezed.

Mission snorted, "What's with the perfume?"

I shrugged, "No idea, Mish. Probably some sort of ritual going on or maybe meditation, I honestly don't know."

We asked a Jedi about the cafeteria and finally found it. We went in. It was pretty empty, as it wasn't time yet for the late afternoon meal. Yet, Jedi walked in and out at all hours. There was always something available to eat. The three of us took a tray and we walked up to steaming counters of food. The food looked like some sort of vegetable stew. Zaalbar moaned that there wasn't any animal protein. Oh yea….Bastila did mention that the meals here had no meat. Poor Zaalbar. I sighed, "I am sorry, Zaalbar, the Jedi don't believe in meat, just vegetables. Although that makes no sense to me, because I am pretty sure plants can feel pain too once you cut them off from their roots and they start dying."

Zaalbar moaned forlornly and we took the vegetable stew along with some sort of flat bread that was as dark as Zaalbar's fur.

We took a seat at one of the long tables that existed and proceeded to eat. Zaalbar got up after his first plate and went for seconds. I chuckled lightly, "I hope this Enclave has enough food for a wookiee sized appetite."

Mission smiled softly, "Yea, I think the Beks were kind of rele…." She sighed sadly, "I suppose Gadon and the others are…."

I shrugged, "I don't know, Mission. I honestly don't know. They did live in the Lower City; they might have survived the initial bombardment. It's hard to say what's left. Maybe…." I paused, "Maybe the Republic will send rescue teams."

A woman entered the cafeteria and she stopped and seemed to be staring at us, not us, no she seemed to be staring acutely at me. She approached us, "Hello Phoenix Star….."

I frowned, "Excuse me….do I know you?"

"Perhaps not….but I have heard of you from Bastila."

"Uhh….well she never mentioned you."

"I am Jedi Master Healer Jula Jax."

She stood staring at me for the longest and then said, "I am sorry….I really need to get back to my duties."

Mission frowned, "What was that all about?"

"I don't know….but it felt like I was being stalked, kind of creepy actually but then again maybe there are Jedi that are just...well...sort of like that."

I finished my food and said, "I think we should get back to the Hawk, I know Bastila said she would be waiting for me there. Knowing Bastila, she's probably going nuts that I am not waiting for her now."


	28. Chapter 27: Dantooine: The Jedi Masters

**Chapter 27: Dantooine: The Jedi Masters**

 **~Phoenix~**

I ran ahead of Mission and Zaalbar, as I suddenly heard Bastila's voice in my head.: _:Phoenix, where are you?::_ It did not sound happy or pleased at all. Returning to the Hawk, I found Bastila looking rather impatient at me, "Where have you been? The Jedi Masters want to meet with you. I told you I'd return here and you wander off."

I sighed. "I am sorry Bastila, I had to spend time with..." I paused a moment, "a friend was in pain. I was healing their wounds."

Bastila looked over my shoulder and we both saw Mission and Zaalbar come slowly to the doorway of the Enclave. Zaalbar had been walking slowly but after eating five helpings of stew in the cafeteria, he seemed to be acting like he was in a bit of a food related coma. Mission was helping the wookiee from toppling over and was having a bit of trouble from keeping him from falling over.

"Well it's good to see Mission up and moving around. I…." Bastila paused a moment and bowed her head. "I wish to apologize to you, Phoenix. I've been overly critical of you and here you are not even a Jedi, and you are helping Mission recover from what happened on Taris. I think…." she paused a moment, "While I cannot speak for the masters, I think this in itself speaks well of you."

I smiled softly at Bastila and then rushed over to Mission and together we helped Zaalbar get back into Hawk where he collapsed into a heap in the cargo hold. Mission and I laughed. Mission shook her head,"Okay, no more vegetable stew for Zaalbar."

Zaalbar belched and Mission and I held our noses.

"Pee-eew…..Big Z"

Zaalbar moaned a bit, but even I couldn't figure out what he was saying. Although I had a feeling it was something about having a belly ache or that his stomach felt really full. I heard a laugh and I saw Carth leaning beside the cargo hold entry way. I chuckled lightly with Carth. He shook his head. "I heard that wookiees can eat a lot, but I never thought that they could over do it. Anyway, I heard you have a meeting with the Jedi council."

Bastila entered the cargo hold and she rolled her eyes at the prone wookiee. I noticed the traces of a faint smile on her lips. Was it possible that Bastila was amused? I didn't think that was possible. However, she glanced at me and the smile disappeared from her face as if she was hoping that I or the others didn't notice. What was it about Bastila that tried so hard to be a Jedi and yet seemed so constrained and so forced at times? I refused to be like that, I couldn't be like that. It wasn't natural at all.

"That is correct Carth, but if Phoenix doesn't hurry. They might decide not to see her after all."

Carth sighed and shook his head. " Bastila what's going on? Phoenix isn't a Jedi and the Jedi don't normal meet with those who are not members of the Order."

Bastila said firmly, "I'm sorry, Carth but I cannot tell you. All I ask is that you trust in the Force and the wisdom of the Council. "

"Well, I don't like being left out of the loop, but I'm not looking to get you in any trouble with the Jedi Masters. We'll do things your way for a while."

Bastila calmly took my hand and we both walked together to the council. Carth followed close behind, despite the fact that Bastila seemed to be giving him a hard look. It was obvious she really didn't want him to come. Yet, I knew Carth cared about me; we had been through so much on Taris, he seemed determined to stick by me. He Yet when we reached the main council chamber she said firmly. "Stay back Carth Onasi, what goes on here now is between Phoenix Star, myself, and the council."

Carth sighed and he looked at me, concern etched on his features and he muttered."I don't like this Phoenix, this seems unusual to me..."

I lightly patted Carth on the shoulder. "Would you lighten up, Republic. I did say I wanted to become a Jedi. I am hoping….well here's my best chance in becoming a Jedi."

He shook his head. "Here's the thing, Phoenix, the Jedi don't normally take on adults for training. I wish all the best for you Phoenix, but you're what….in your early thirties?"

I glared at him. "Gee, Republic are you trying to insult me about my age?"

"No….just stating facts. You're way too old to be a Jedi. Jedi take children practically out of the cradle and sometime during childhood from the Republic worlds all the time, supposedly to keep them detached from their families. So like I stated, there's absolutely no way the Council is going to even consider..."

I coughed and interjected. "Wow Republic, thanks for the vote of confidence."

He sighed. "Anyway...I better not hold you any longer. Good luck, Phoenix."

I heard the trickling of water, and the tinkling of chimes coming from the council chamber. The place radiated calm, peace, and serenity. Wasn't that some sort of Jedi mantra? I smelled yet again that sandalwood smell of incense, that I had smelled earlier in the sub level of the Enclave. I sneezed once again, damn I must be allergic to it. There was encircling the council chamber thickly growing shrubs and vines, enclosing me within the fold of the council chamber. It kept the council chamber private and kept Carth and others from seeing what was going on.

I walked forward towards the Jedi Masters. They all stood quietly in the center of the Enclave. Their faces were stoic without so much betraying one ounce of emotion. I shivered a bit. They all seemed to be staring me down. For a few minutes they said nothing seeming to do the same as that really creepy healing Master had done earlier. Finally one of the masters spoke a red skinned Twi'lek. He said calmly. "Bastila has told me all about you, Phoenix Star. She has told me how you helped to rescue her and your events on Taris. It is good that you are here. We have been discussing your rather special case. I am Zhar, a member of the Jedi Council."

He motioned to the Jedi Masters before him. "With me are Master Vrook, Master Vandar and, of course, the Chronicler of our Academy, Master Dorak. Padawan Bastila I am sure you are already familiar with."

I frowned. "Isn't the Jedi Council on Coruscant?"

Zhar responded, "Yes, the High Council of the Jedi Order is on Coruscant, but we are the Council in charge of the training facility here on Dantooine."

"Why am I special case?"

"Bastila has stated that you are inordinately strong in the Force. You are here because we are contemplating you as a candidate for training, you are a special case due to your age."

I nodded, Carth was right, but damn it all. I wanted to be a Jedi, despite the fact as Carth had put it, I was too old. I didn't care what Carth or the Order stated I felt a yearning or pull within me to be a Jedi. I had to be a Jedi, the Force as I knew it was calling no...urging me that I had to be a Jedi. "Nothing would give me greater honor than learning the ways of the Jedi."

One of the older Masters, I think his name was Vrook glared at me. I shivered and avoided his glance, something about him seemed harsh and cold. "Master Zhar speaks out of turn, perhaps. We need indisputable proof of your strong affinity to the Force before we would even consider accepting you for training."

I gulped. What could I give as proof? I was about to speak when Bastila interjected, "Proof? Surely the entire Council can feel the strength of the Force within this woman... and I have already related to you events regarding this woman."

Vrook continued. "Perhaps it was simple luck."

Zhar shook his head, "We both know there is no luck. There is only the Force. We all feel the power in Bastila's companion, though it is wild and untamed. Now that this power has begun to manifest itself, can we safely ignore it?"

I felt suddenly as if I was in a verbal sparring match between Vrook and Zhar now, my fate was in their hands and Vrook said firmly. "The Jedi training is long and difficult, even when working with a young and open mind. Teaching a child is hard. How much harder will it be for an adult to learn the ways of the Jedi?"

I suddenly felt angry, it seemed as though Vrook was going to deny me training. I couldn't let that happen and I spoke firmly. "I am ready to accept the training... and my age has nothing to do with it!"

Vrook shook his head at me and glared at me. "Such pride! Such arrogance! Ach. This one is already on the path to the dark side!"

The strange green master the one that Zhar said his name was Vandar spoke."As are many who are not given proper training, Master Vrook. Only through our guidance can we hope to lead those who have strayed back to the path of light."

I frowned and my heart sank within me. Vrook was hard, he seemed to spend time glaring at me. His cold gaze chilled me to the core. I felt like he was staring into the depths of my soul and then some. I had heard that Jedi Masters could read what was in your heart. Was Vrook doing so now with me? I didn't like the idea that he could read my inner most motivations.

Dorak spoke, although I am not sure if he was speaking to the other Masters or to me, "Traditionally the Jedi do not accept adults for training, though there are rare exceptions in the history of our Order. But you are a special case."

Vandar nodded. "I agree with Master Dorak. Many of our own pupils are leaving the Jedi order to follow the Sith teachings, we need recruits to stand against Malak! With Revan dead..."

Vrook still glared at me. He must hate me for some unknown reason and I thought Jedi weren't suppose to hate. I don't know what sort of animosity he held against me. Yet it was there. I felt like my chances for being a Jedi suddenly died with him as he spoke. "Are you certain Revan is truly dead? What if we undertake to train this one and the Dark Lord should return."

My shoulders slumped dejectedly, that was it, my whole idea being trained was over, killed by a man who seemed to think, I had something to do with Revan. Dark Lord return? Vrook had to be on spice or something. I had spent my life fighting against the evil of the Mandalorians and the Sith, so what did he have against me? Tears threatened to brim over my eyes, yet I did not wish to show any weakness to Vrook or any of the Jedi before me. I knew I was going to lose it. Damn Vrook! I am no Dark Lord, if I was…I wouldn't allow Vrook to emotionally beat me as he was doing now.

Vandar spoke but my heart felt like it was going to break. "We should discuss this matter more fully in private. Bastila, you and your companion must go. This is a matter for the Council alone."

I turned and ran out of the council and I heard Bastila speak. "As you wish, Master Vandar. We shall return to the Ebon Hawk and leave you to your deliberations."

Tears finally came flowing from my eyes, I wasn't going to be a Jedi after all, I just knew it. Damn that Master Vrook, he had it in for me for sure.

Carth saw me as I exited. "Phoenix…."

I shook my head at him, "Go away, Carth. Just go away…."

I ran back to the Hawk and went to a bunk and sobbed my eyes out. My whole dream of being a Jedi gone. My world sunk and everything went black…..

 **~0o0~**

I gasped suddenly, my body felt cold, where was I? This wasn't the Hawk. I looked around and found myself looking around dark foreboding ruins. The Dark Lord was pacing back and forth. I shivered, Revan? What was Revan doing here?

I saw what looked to be Malak beside him, they stood before a doorway and he spoke, "The dark side is strong in this place – I can feel its power!"

Revan said nothing and his hand raised quietly, the doors to the archway opened as the Force pushed the doorway open. Revan walked in as Malak still spoke.

"Is this wise? The ancient Jedi sealed this archway. If we pass beyond this door, we can never go back. The Order will surely banish us. Are the secrets of the Star Forge so valuable? Can its power truly be worth the risk?"

Malak finally entered and walked alongside Revan. I saw a strange ancient device open, it glowed and pulsed with its own power revealing what looked to be some strange sort of map.

I gasped suddenly and the vision fled from my eyes. I shivered; I was back on the Hawk. My eyes felt matted, yep, I had cried myself to sleep. I rubbed the gritty sand away from my eyes. I hadn't cried like that since I was a kid. Maybe my emotional distress had caused the vision I had seen. In fact, I was pretty sure of it. I groaned my whole body ached as I got out of the bunk. What time was it? The crono showed that it was a new day. Damn, I had cried myself to sleep yesterday and no one had disturbed me at all. Considering that the Ebon Hawk was a small ship that was kind of unusual. Maybe Bastila had told everyone to leave me alone. I quietly smoothed the wrinkles out of my clothing as I had slept in my clothes and dashed some water across my face. I was hungry and I passed by the food dispenser and….

T3 beeped at me::Don't Phoenix, the food dispenser needs new parts. I asked Canderous to get them as Bastila said you weren't to be disturbed last night, and I didn't want to ask the others, they don't like me.::

I shook my head, what was it with this droid thinking no one liked him, except me?

I snorted a bit. "That had to be interesting asking a Mandalorian to get parts."

T3 beeped wildly::Yes, he threatened to take me apart and use me as spare parts for the dispenser. But he went anyway.::

I laughed lightly. "I guess I am going to have to find something in the Enclave to eat." I exited the ship and blinked as the bright sunlight hit my eyes.

I found Carth outside the ship, he was eating a piece of fruit and he looked at me. "No offense but you look horrible. And you're not the only one to look like crap either. Bastila came out earlier out looking haggard and pale as a sheet, and now you. Well, Bastila did mention that you should go to the Council chambers before she left. It is no doubt urgent, so you shouldn't keep them waiting."

I sighed. "Did she say anything else?"

"No, she didn't. She didn't seem well, as I recall... and for that matter neither do you. Are you alright?"

"I…." I paused, "considering how the council dashed my hopes against a rock, I had a rough night."

Carth sighed. "Yea plus what happened with Taris, I can't say I blame you. I... I haven't exactly been sleeping well myself. Here I thought things would get better once we escaped Taris."

I smiled softly and shook my head, "Got anymore fruit, Republic?"

He nodded and handed me an apple. I took it from him. "Thanks. Guess I better go see Bastila and the council."

I munched away on the apple and walked slowly to the council chamber. I had better get this over with, the end of my hopes for being trained. I wasn't sure what I was going to do now. I entered the council chamber to find Bastila waiting for me along with the masters.

Vandar spoke, "Bastila has told us of a most unusual development. She claims you and she have shared a dream, a vision of Malak and Revan in the ancient ruins here on Dantooine."

I raised an eyebrow. Shared a dream? I didn't recall feeling Bastila in my dream. Maybe she had been in my dream, but this was a first, I was feeling a bit annoyed, "I don't even know what Bastila is talking about?"

Vrook snapped at me. "See? Dishonesty! We are taking an incalculable risk in even considering training this one!"

I grumbled a bit and said angrily. "It's not a lie….what is Bastila talking about? Sharing a dream? It was my dream not hers."

I suddenly felt ashamed. If I wanted to be a Jedi I wasn't helping things. I sighed and muttered. "I am sorry. I am just not use to this."

Zhar looked at me sympathetically and said calmly. "You cannot deny what you are. These dreams are part of you. The Force is part of you, though a part you cannot yet control. But through training and discipline we can teach you to live as one with the Force."

Vandar nodded. "Bastila says that she felt your presence within the dream, the presence she has felt within you ever since...well since Taris. It is not unknown for this to happen between two people strong in the Force."

I raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

Zhar spoke. "You and Bastila share a powerful connection to the Force... and each other. This is not unheard of. Connections often form between Master and student, but rarely does a bond develop so quickly."

"A bond?" I frowned. "What the…..frac..." I stopped in mid swear, it wouldn't be appropriate to swear at the masters. How in the two suns of Tatooine did I get bonded to Bastila? I wasn't even aware of it, till the council now mentioned it. I looked glumly at Bastila and she seemed to look at me with the same sort of glumness.

Vandar nodded. "Bastila has described this shared dream to the Council in great detail. We feel it is more than a dream. It is a vision. The Force is acting through you as it acts through Bastila. Whatever dangers may lie ahead, we cannot ignore the destiny that has brought you and Bastila here to us. Together."

I sighed. "So I am having visions now and you're saying….I am joined with her?"

Vandar said calmly. "You and she are linked, as is your fate to hers. Together, you two may be able to stop Darth Malak and the Sith."

I took a deep breath, my eyes brightened. In order for me and Bastila to be able to stop Malak and the Sith meant….well it meant they were going to train me. I sighed, thank the Force. I was going to be a Jedi after all.

However, Vrook interrupted my thoughts. "But do not let your head be filled with visions of glory and power! Such thoughts are the path to the dark side. The way of the light is long and difficult, as you must learn. Are you ready for such hardship?"

I nodded. "I'll try my best, masters."

Vandar spoke. "Understand that there is little choice in this matter, for you or us. Across the galaxy the numbers of our Order dwindle. We have sent many Jedi in quest of a way to thwart Malak's advance... many have not returned. The Sith hunt the Jedi down like animals, ambushing and assassinating our brothers wherever they are found. We fear it is only a matter of time until they discover even this hidden refuge."

Vrook responded. "Other Jedi have fallen from the light and embraced the dark side, giving their allegiance to the Sith and Malak, their dark lord."

I frowned. "Jedi are turning to the Dark Side? How?"

Vrook answered my question. "The lure of the dark side is not easy to resist. Malak's power grows as more and more planets fall to his conquering armies."

Zhar picked up the conversation. "If Malak is not stopped the Republic will fall, and the Jedi will be hunted to extinction. The galaxy will enter a time of darkness and tyranny not seen for a thousand generations."

Vandar nodded and then stated. "The Council has decreed that you and Bastila must investigate the ancient ruins you dreamed of... once the Council deems you ready."

Master Dorak then added. "Perhaps there you will find some clue, some explanation, of how Revan and Malak were corrupted. And perhaps there you shall find a way to stop them."

I suddenly grinned and said proudly. "I will learn your Jedi powers and defeat Malak!"

Vrook shook his head at me. "The Force flows through you like no student we have ever seen. But you are willful and headstrong... a dangerous combination."

I rolled my eyes a bit, damn this Master Vrook, nothing I said even pleased him.

Vandar said calmly. "Before we send you to investigate the ruins, you must be trained in the ways of the Jedi so that you can resist the darkness within yourself... within all of us. Otherwise you are doomed to fail."

I sighed. "Is that really necessary? We honestly don't have time for this!"

Vandar shook his head at me. "You must learn patience and discipline. The ruins are a place of corruption. The dark side is strong there. We cannot risk sending you there unprepared."

Zhar said calmly. "We must begin your training at once. You have a destiny upon you that you must be prepared to face. The entire fate of the galaxy is upon you."

Vrook ended the conversation, "I can only hope you will prove up to the task."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I sighed as I lead Phoenix to the sub level, as part of ritual; I forced Phoenix to shed all her clothing. She now stood in her underwear. Her clothing was thrown into fire. I quietly handed her a simple white tunic and pants to symbolize her transition as an apprentice of the order. She quietly put on the clothing, her black hair standing out amid the stark white of the clothing she now wore.

"So you didn't feel the bond?"

She sighed. "Maybe, I don't know. If I did feel it, it was all subconsciously felt and I was unaware of it."

I nodded. "Well with training I suppose you will become more aware of it. I guess I should have said something to you more about it when we were on Taris."

Phoenix's eyes lit up as if she recalled something. "Well maybe that's not entirely true about me not fully feeling it, when we fought together….." she paused, "I felt like all our combat was as one, but I couldn't understand why and how that was."

"That would be the bond."

She looked at me. "So Bastila….what now? You've basically made me shed all my clothing and I am wearing apprentice clothing. So now what?"

I smiled. "You must learn meditation. You must quiet your mind so the Force is awakened within you. This is probably the hardest step of your training. Master Zhar would be the best one to help you on that."

She paused a moment. "If we're bonded together, wouldn't you be the best teacher?"

I contemplated that for a moment, "Perhaps…..I would have to ask the Masters, as I am only a padawan. Let me check with them first."

Phoenix watched me as I used a comm channel and contacted the masters. I spoke with them at length and they seemed to agree with Phoenix that I would be the best one to open Phoenix's mind to the Force.

"Come with me, Phoenix….we need a quiet private spot to meditate."

We wandered the sub-level of the enclave till we came to a quiet garden and we sat cross legged on the floor.

I whispered quietly. "Phoenix…..close your eyes and breath."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I quietly sat as Bastila told me to close my eyes and breath and Bastila's voice became quiet and solemn as she spoke.

"Center everything within you and focus deep within yourself. Imagine yourself in the most peaceful spot within your memories."

I quietly sat and contemplated on the most peaceful spot I could think of.

 _I was in a swing as a child. My father pushing me. I was laughing, "Higher papa….higher…."_

 _He pushed the swing back and forth my legs and my whole body floating in the air in the swing. I closed my eyes and felt the rush of air as my father pushed me back and forth on the swing._

Bastila spoke, "In that spot that you are now in, let your mind open and breath within that corner of your mind.

 _The rush of air….I felt light. I breathed. And suddenly I felt something. The enclave, the Jedi around me. The masters, Carth, Mission, Zaalbar, Canderous._

Bastila voice changed timber. "I can sense you feel it, Phoenix. Extend further…."

I reached beyond and felt the spinning of Dantooine, the planet slowly rotating in the system. Then further out, I felt moons, suns, stars, and planets. Planets, all filled with people and all of them very much alive.

I gasped. "I feel it….I feel it."

Bastila smiled, and I could feel her smile with my eyes closed. "Come back Phoenix….come back and now focus on me."

Slowly I turned away from the bigger universe I felt and came slowly back down to Dantooine and back to the room I was in. I smiled softly. "Bastila…."

I suddenly felt a rush as I could now feel Bastila very intently. I felt her heart beat within her chest, I felt the breath she took, I felt, I blinked a moment and turned red, she had feelings for me and they weren't completely platonic either. I went to probe deeper, but suddenly I couldn't feel that anymore, as if those thoughts were completely shut off.

I opened my eyes and Bastila looked a bit embarrassed, I took my fingers and lightly scratched my arm with my finger nails and Bastila gasped a bit. "Phoenix…."

"I feel you Bastila, you felt that….didn't you?"

She nodded and she was quiet a moment. "What am I thinking or feeling, Phoenix?"

I paused a moment and said. "You're hungry….." I slightly blushed a bit. "Although, I am not sure if it's for food."

Bastila glared at me, "Such thoughts are forbidden!"

I frowned. "Hey I didn't think them, you did! I stood up and grinned, "Face it Bastila, I know what you felt, try and hide it from me if you want."

"I knew taking it upon myself to open you up to the Force was a bad idea. I should have convinced the masters otherwise."

"Yea, maybe it was, but at least I know how you feel about me. Don't drive me crazy, Bastila. You know how I feel about Carth."

Bastila sighed. "Yes, I do, very much so. I've felt it drive you since Taris, but this is not an appropriate discussion. We are supposed to be beyond such things."

I nodded. "And I agree with you, Bastila. There's too much at stake in the universe to think about…..well such relationships. It's why Carth and I swore off pursing anything in depth. It's not that we don't care about each other, I believe we both care about each other, very much so. Yet…..the pain of losing each other in war or anything else, it would be too hard to bare."

I sighed. "Come on Bastila, this sort of talk makes me pucker up inside like a really sour piece of fruit. Let's grab a bite to eat, since I do believe I felt that you were hungry in the first place, and you've conveniently made me hungry too."

Bastila nodded. "A drawback of our bond, I am afraid. It makes us feel similar things. It's hard to ignore or not to act upon it."

"We're both in a hard spot, aren't we?"

"Indeed we are."


	29. Chapter 28: Dantooine: Training part 1

****Chapter 28: Dantooine: Training part 1****

 ** **~Cart**** ** **h~****

"What do you mean I can't see, Phoenix?"

The protocol droid responded flatly. "I am sorry, the Jedi council has decreed that Apprentice Star is not to have any contact with any of her friends at this time."

"Did the council give a reason?"

"The council believes the presence of her friends is a distraction to Apprentice Star. They believe that she needs the time to focus on her training."

I muttered obscenities under my breath, I didn't like it. I also wondered if Phoenix would be the same woman that came out of training. What if she came out of that training and ended up a mirror version of Bastila or if she came out changed or a completely different person?

Mission looked at me as she had come with me to inquire about Phoenix and she said calmly, "Come on Carth, Nix will be fine."

"What if she becomes an entirely different person after training?"

Mission chuckled."What you think Nix is going to change dramatically all of a sudden?"

I was quiet and Mission shook her head, "You've got it bad for her, don't you, Carth?"

I sighed and then nodded. Who was I fooling? I couldn't deny it anymore. I had feelings for Phoenix. This not being able to see her made it more pronounced. I gave a long drawn out sigh."Yes, Mission. And what's worse is that Jedi don't believe in physical attachments. So even if I do feel something for Phoenix, she can't act on it anyway." I shook my head in frustration. "Damn it all, I should have acted on what we felt when we were back on Taris before all this."

Mission smiled softly. "But haven't there been Jedi that well…..sort of broke that taboo?"

"Yea….but I think the Jedi cast them out or exiled them or something? I heard this rumor that there was this old Jedi who ended up married and all but he killed his wife simply because he didn't agree with her during the Mandalorian Wars, or was it the war with Exar Kun? Anyway, the story was that he was exiled for the marriage. They welcomed him back after he killed her. That's kind of twisted if you ask me. I don't know, Mission. I hear stuff from Fleet officers all the time about the Jedi. Some of it would make your hair stand on end."

Mission shook her head. "I wouldn't worry Carth. Nix isn't going to change that much. She's going to be the same person, just with sparkly Force powers."

"I hope you're right, Mission." I clinched my hands together trying to think of a way to get past this damn Jedi secrecy. I then had an idea. "Mission, you and Zaalbar go often to the enclave to eat right?"

Mission nodded. "Yea…."

"Well what if we just "happened" to have lunch and we just so "happened" to run into a certain apprentice."

Mission grinned. "Carth, you're acting sneaky, I didn't think you had that type of sneakiness in you."

I smiled. "What can I say Mission, you and Phoenix taught me that if you can't go in the front door you try the back door instead."

* * *

 ** **~Phoenix~****

"Bastila, is this really necessary? I mean the fleet has my medical and service records."

"The Jedi keep their own records, Phoenix. If something happens to you….."

I stared at Bastila and shook my head. "I have no family, Bastila. They're all dead. The Jedi…." I sighed. "Well you're basically the only family I have now. I think keeping records for that is a complete waste of time."

Bastila shook her head. "What if you end up injured, we will need to send your medical records and the Jedi are known for keeping very good records, better than the Republic's databases."

I sighed. "Fine, you win. I just hate being poked and prodded."

We walked into the medical wing of the Enclave. Jula Jax smiled at me. "Ahh so we meet again, Phoenix Star."

Bastila frowned. "Again?"

Jula smiled softly. "Yes Jedi Shan, we met briefly the other day or so."

She looked at me and bowed her head a bit. "I do apologize, apprentice for the other day. Your presence is like…." She sighed. "It is like…."

"A hurricane, a burning sun, the heart of the Force….."

She frowned. "How did you know?"

I muttered. "From several of the other masters, padawans, and other apprentices. In all seriousness though, I wish they would stop comparing me to that or to any other sort of powerful force. I am just an ordinary woman. Do anymore Force gazing on me….and….well…" I paused. "I am sick of it. So please just stop."

Jula Jax nodded. "Fair enough, apprentice. Have a seat on the bed, this won't take long."

I sat down on a bed as Jula began to scan me with a scanner. I rolled my eyes a bit. Jula shook her head. "I take it you don't like being scanned."

"Nope, I was one of those children that went to see a healer kicking and screaming, particularly when there was blood drawn as well. I always had this strange idea that my blood was going to be used to clone me or….some other weird scientific monstrosity."

Jula chuckled. "It sounds like you had a very active imagination as a child."

Bastila said calmly. "Speaking of childhood, I realize I don't know a whole lot about you, Phoenix and considering our bond….I'd like to know more about you. All I have is your fleet service records. So I wonder if you don't mind answering a few questions for me."

I sighed. "I suppose so…."

Jula smiled softly as she continued scanning me with some sort of medical device.

"Don't worry, these are simple questions. Nothing too intrusive. First, what kind of background do you have?"

"I was a smuggler before I joined the fleet."

"Good. On which planet were you born?"

"Deralia. It's in a remote system. Why?"

"Excellent. Your current age is?"

I coughed a bit. "Gee Bastila…..isn't that in my service records?"

"Yes, well… The truth is I was studying __how__ you responded to my questions. Your reactions help me judge you; this was a test for me to learn more about your character."

"And?"

"You were honest, which is good. And you treated this as a serious matter, which it is. This bond we share will shape both our destinies; it is not to be taken lightly. But I imagine you've had enough questions for a while. So many things have happened to you since Taris. It's probably a lot for you to absorb."

I frowned. "Damn it Bastila, I don't like being manipulated!"

Bastila nodded. "I see. I didn't mean to upset you, but I suppose it was inevitable. You've had a lot to absorb since we escaped Taris. I apologize."

I suddenly cried out. "Yeeouch….."

Jula shook her head as she took a vial of blood from my arm. I frowned. "Geesh….between you and Bastila I feel like I am getting poked and prodded way too much."

Jula sighed. "I apologize apprentice….but I was trying to do this as unobtrusively as possible."

Bastila flinched a bit and rubbed her arm in the exact same place where my blood was drawn. Jula's eyes went wide. "I've never seen such a strong Force bond….no wait….I have."

I frowned. "From who?"

"A Jedi who followed Revan to war. He had such a strong presence as well. He was able to form Force bonds so easily…..his name was Liam. Liam Mandrel. Such a shame what happened to him?"

"What happened to him?"

The healer sighed. "Well from my medical records, he came back broken and not an ounce of the Force to be found within him. Such a shame, the Masters exiled him."

I frowned a bit. "That name…..it sounds oddly familiar…."

Bastila raised an eyebrow. "Maybe you met him during your smuggling runs?"

"Perhaps…...although I don't recall meeting Jedi during my runs. Although….." I paused a moment. "I suppose anything is possible with the Force."

"That is true, Phoenix. Why don't you go and get a bite to eat. I also need to update my medical records with Master Jax."

I nodded. "Okay, Bastila" I got off the bed and left the medical wing.

* * *

 ** **~Bastila~****

I sighed and focused my mind making sure it was shielded from Phoenix and looked at Master Jax. "You took an incredible risk mentioning the Jedi Exile like that."

Master Jax shrugged. "Her mind is still reacting to the re-programming. She is fine."

I shook my head. "Is she? She seemed to remember something. I had to distract her."

"I scanned her. Bastila. Her brain waves indicate that the re-programming is indeed working. Plus the questions you asked her prove it. All this despite what I've heard from the Masters about you and her having dreams."

I shook my head. "You better hope so Master Jax….I won't be responsible if Revan suddenly remembers who she is and starts killing Jedi. Maybe she'll start with you, for being such a manipulative witch."

I was upset, I disliked Jax because she was so confident when she helped me re-programmed Revan. She did it without question and murdered Revan. I….hat...no I did not hate her, at least I didn't think I hated her. Did I honestly want Revan to kill her? Where were these thoughts coming from?

Master Jax blanched. "There's no need to get this testy, Bastila. Maybe I should check on how your brainwaves are because it sounds like the bon…."

I interjected. "Don't blame the bond I have with Revan on this, Master Jax. For the sake of our mission, stay away from her, do you hear me! You've caused more harm than good!"

Shame on you! You're lying now. It is the bond. What's happening to me? Did Revan really act like this in her past? I shivered, I can't let this infect me! Breathe….let it go. I rushed out of the Healing chamber too ashamed to talk any further with the healer.

* * *

 ** **~Phoenix~****

I stopped by the archives and grabbed a lesson manual that Master Dorak had approved for me to read. I really wish he would let me access a bit more of the archives. I craved learning. I never realized how much knowledge the Jedi had. Each page, each holocron I was allowed to access, my eyes opened to more and more of the ways of the Force. The books helped me improve my skills in various techniques.

I then went to the cafeteria and grabbed my lunch. I sat quietly down. I smirked a bit as I read the text and quietly used the Force to allow the food to float into my mouth and I munched down on the food and read the text. I also floated the soup bowl to my mouth and took a sip of the soup. Bastila would probably say this was frivolous, but I disagreed. It saved me time having to spoon food into my mouth and having to put down the text I was reading. My head was bent down as I read the text as I quietly read the texts.

The other apprentices snickered at me, of course most of the other apprentices were teenagers or children. I heard the names they were calling me. They called me Raven or Raven Topknot because all they could see was my dark black head bent over looking at texts.

* * *

 ** **~Carth~****

Entering the Jedi's cafeteria was fairly easy with Mission and Zaalbar with me. The Jedi seemed to take our presence for granted. I started looking for Phoenix. Fortunately the cafeteria was fairly empty, most of the apprentices and Padawans were involved in lessons. Mission and Zaalbar went and got food and promptly sat down.

I saw a dark black haired person bent over a text reading. Food seemed to float into her mouth as she ate. I chuckled a bit, it was Phoenix. I wasn't expecting her to be able to use the Force so quickly. Yet apparently, she was a quick study. I smiled as I walked over to her.

"Hey beautiful…."

Phoenix looked up and she sighed. "Republic…."

She smiled softly and then her smile faded. "The Masters have told me I am not supposed to talk to you."

"Oh and you're going to listen to them!"

She sighed. "Well….normally…..look Republic. I can't afford to get the Masters upset at this moment in time. I have to learn the ways of the Force. There will be plenty of time to talk afterwards."

I shook my head. "That's not the Phoenix I am use to talking to, the Phoenix I know wouldn't…."

She shook her head. "Please Carth…..not now. The masters are always watching me. I can sense them."

I frowned. "You can sense them! You've only been an apprentice for a few days and you can sense them."

She sighed and then stood up. "Look….you're making things really hard for me with your presence. I promise…." She paused a moment, "your presence is…." Her shoulders slumped lightly. "I know why you're here, Carth. You're worried about me. You care for me, deeply."

I frowned. "Damn it woman, stay out of my head."

She chuckled lightly. "I am not in your head, just surface impressions. You're easy to read. Shoot you were always easy to read even without the Force. I am fine, Carth. Please leave. I promise we will have plenty of time to talk later on."

I shook my head. "You're not fine, you sound like..."

She sighed. "Like a Jedi." She rolled her eyes and then said. "Damn it Republic, I am a Jedi. Stop being like a lovesick bantha and go before we both get into trouble."

I raised an eyebrow. "You're afraid….."

She shook her head. "I am not….I just want to finish my studies, become a padawan, then a knight, and defeat Malak."

My jaw dropped. "Defeat Malak….is that what they are training you for? That's….that's crazy, Phoenix. You're not even a padawan and they're grooming you to take on Malak…..that's….that's...not my idea of being heroic. Taking on the Dark Lord, that's more like my idea of suicide."

"Carth, it is my destiny. I know it is. Please...don't question the Masters. I…."

I looked incredulous. "I don't believe what I am hearing! There's a word for that…. it's called being brainwashed, indoctrinated. I thought the Sith were bad….but maybe….maybe the Jedi are just as bad."

Phoenix cringed suddenly. "I am not….look I doubt you would understand. The Jedi wouldn't even let me be trained as a Jedi without acknowledging the fact that I am destined to….go after Malak. I want to be a Jedi. It's my destiny and going after Malak….it's my destiny."

I snorted. "Stop repeating that Jedi crap! You're scaring me, Phoenix. Think about what you're saying. You're going to be taking on _The_ Dark Lord of the Sith. You may think you're a very powerful woman and the Force is with you, but all that's going to happen is one, Malak will kill you or two you'll join him and become a Dark Jedi."

Phoenix shook her head. "Look….Republic…."

Our conversation was interrupted by Bastila who entered within the cafeteria and I heard Bastila's voice. "Carth, you shouldn't be here!"

I turned to Bastila. "Is it true?"

She frowned."What?"

"The masters are training Phoenix to be a weapon against Malak."

Bastila sighed. "It is far more complicated than that, Carth. I can't go into details. Please Carth, for the sake of the Republic, for the sake of the order, it would be best for you to let this be and to leave. Let Phoenix finish her training."

I turned to Phoenix. "I'll leave but….it doesn't change my mind, the Jedi have obviously indoctrinated you into thinking you can go after the Dark Lord."

Phoenix's eyes looked pained. "Please Carth, Bastila is right. It's complicated. I…." She sighed and came over and then said softly, "You want proof I am not "indoctrinated" then…." She leaned forward and kissed me lightly on the cheek, "There is your proof, Republic. Now go...I must continue my training."

I felt the kiss on my cheek, it shocked me. I wasn't expecting that. Bastila frowned. "Phoenix…..such displays are….inappropriate."

She looked at Bastila, "Look Bastila. It's the only way I can convince this fool headed man that I am not..." She sighed. "He's afraid of me. Can't you sense that? I can't let him think…."

She looked at me. "Carth, I am still Phoenix Star. I care about you. Just because I am now a Jedi, doesn't mean what I feel or think is any different. It's just my perspective is a bit more….complex. A lot more complex than it has been. I have a destiny I have to complete, one that I am slowly beginning to realize and the Masters say I have. Please don't be afraid of me or fear what I've become."

I sighed. "I hope you know what you're getting into Phoenix. Destiny or not, I will always be worried about you."

She smiled softly. "I know, now go, Republic. Let me be, let me finish my training." She paused and then softly whispered in my ear. "I love you…."


	30. Chapter 29: Dantooine: Training Part 2

**Chapter 29: Dantooine: Training part 2**

 **~Mission~**

You know, I was getting pretty sick and tired of Carth's moping. Ever since Nix had went for training and we had sneaked into the cafeteria to see Nix and he was told to leave he had been moping. He really had it bad for her. Sort of like Griff, with that two-timing no good space tramp Lena. I finally decided that it was for Carth's own good to do something about it. I had an idea. I called for T3 and the droid eagerly came to me and beeped eager to talk to me. I don't know what was up with that droid it seemed to be moping as well. Ever since, Nix was spending 24/7 at the Enclave, poor T3 seemed to be wandering the ship aimlessly. It was like the droid was connected to Phoenix in a way I couldn't figure out. I smiled; there was a way to make this work. I knew it! I came up to Carth with T3 in the Hawk. "You know something Carth. You might not be able to see, Nix but…. I bet T3 can. So I was thinking, you could like record correspondence to Nix and all and she can record back to you. It's not seeing her in person so technically you wouldn't be breaking any, like rules or anything.

Carth nodded. "You know Mission, that's actually not a bad idea. What's the worse that could happen?"

I looked skyward."Well a Jedi could….slice T3 open with a lightsaber."

T3 gave a wild beep and started rolling out of the cockpit. I yelled. "Hey T3 get back in here….you want to see, Nix don't you?"

The droid beeped affirmatively and slowly wheeled back. "So Carth…are you going to proclaim your wild affection for her?"

Carth shook his head. No….that wouldn't be fair. She's a Jedi, any sort of love notes to her would sort of be dishonoring her commitment to the Jedi."

I shook my head. "But I saw her kiss you…."

Carth chuckled lightly. "Yea on the cheek, like a sister would kiss a brother."

I snorted. "Yea, I am sure she meant it in a sisterly way. Come on Carth, you scruffy-looking Nerf-herder, she loves you. Don't know why cuz I've seen better looking guys. Plus Bastila yelled at her. I seriously doubt Bastila would have done that, if it was anything but a sisterly kiss of affection."

Carth sighed. "It's complicated, Mission."

I rolled my eyes. "That's what I heard, Nix say, and Bastila, and now you. Geesh, why does everything have to be complicated?"

He shook his head. "Mission...you're…." I glared at him, daring him to say the word, 'kid', although to his credit he didn't.

"You're awful young Mission. We're dealing with complicated adult issues. She's a Jedi, I am a solider and pilot for the Republic. She has some sort of future fighting the Sith and Force help her if she doesn't break somehow and turn to the Dark Side. We're both going in two completely different directions, in the end everything is against us."

I snorted. "So….there's a story Big Z once told me, about two Wookiee clans and two wookiees from two different clans they fell in love and their clans were against each other. They didn't care, Carth they sought out love over everything."

"And what happened to these two wookiees?"

I paused a moment. "Uhhhh….they killed each other rather than be apart."

Carth suddenly laughed. "Mission, that's probably the worse example for a love story ever. No offense….I am sure Zaalbar's story has a good point but, it still doesn't help that Phoenix and I are going in two different directions." He then sighed. "But recording correspondence isn't a bad idea, Mission and I'll do that. So Mission…." He glared at me.

"What?"

He glared again.

"What?"

He shook his head. "Some privacy would be nice. It is suppose to be private correspondence after all."

"Okay….geesh, don't get your undies in a bunch, Carth."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I looked at T3 and sighed. I never had recorded correspondence on a T3 unit before but I decided here it goes.

"Okay T3 start recording"

T3 beeped and a light shone in my face and the lights on his dome began to blink.

 _Ummm….I've never done this before. It was Mission's idea anyway, but since I can't see you Phoenix, I've decided the next best thing for now is to exchange correspondence via T3. Oh by the way, T3 misses you too._

T3 beeped in the background

 _Anyway. I am not sure what else to say, Beautiful. Except, that I really miss you a lot and I know it's wrong because you're a Jedi but I love you. I've tried to deny it before but I can't help it. Any ideas how long the Masters will keep you sequestered? I hope it's not too much longer. Canderous is getting restless, he says he's heard rumors of Mandalorian raiders and he wants to take them down. Yet I can tell you he wants the Mysterious Stranger by his side. All joking aside, how's the training coming? Let me know, okay?_

I sighed and said. "End recording, T3"

T3 beeped and I smiled. I couldn't understand a darn thing that droid said. Phoenix apparently understood droid binary. I really ought to get her to teach me.

"Okay T3, take the message to Phoenix."

T3 beeped and proceeded to roll away out of the ship.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Master Zhar smiled. "Your progress is astounding…..even though you are only a mere apprentice."

He watched as I floated myself within the training area of the Enclave and had other objects around me. I had my eyes closed when suddenly I felt another object come into my path, I smiled as I quickly picked up the object. I heard beeping and squealing.

::Phoenix….put me down.::

I chuckled. "Of course T3….."

I put the droid down and then quietly put down the other objects around me. T3 was beeping madly and I laughed. "Okay….I promise, never without your permission."

T3 beeped sternly.

"Alright, alright….I swear by the Force, never again without your permission."

Master Zhar laughed lightly. "It seems that your droid, Phoenix has come to see you."

I nodded and T3 beeped:: I have a message from Carth.::

I raised an eyebrow and then looked at Zhar. "Master is it permitted for Carth to send me messages like this?"

Zhar sighed and shook his head. "He is a very determined man, I can see that. Yet, technically he is not breaking the rules the council has established. Yet, it is strongly discouraged."

"Discouraged?"

"You have feelings for him?"

I sighed. "I would be lying if I did not."

"Love is a dangerous emotion, Phoenix."

I shook my head. "I can't believe that, Master Zhar. I know it can lead to jealousy, anger, possessiveness. Those lead to the Dark Side, yes?"

Zhar nodded. "Correct, Apprentice."

I sighed. "Then answer me this, Master Zhar, if I have feelings for friends, feelings even for the brotherhood or sisterhood of Jedi, feelings of loyalty, feelings of companionship, feelings of wanting to protect, and shelter others and those feelings which have nothing to do with love, are those emotions wrong as well?"

Zhar sighed. "You ask some difficult questions, Apprentice. If one is bent too far towards possessiveness towards friends and ties…..then yes it could lead you to the Dark Side."

I frowned, this made no sense to me, "Master my head aches over this, may I have time to ponder over this?"

He nodded. "As you wish…."

He wandered off. I screwed my face up in thought.

 _Bantha poodoo_

What?

 _You heard me, Zhar is full of_ _b_ _antha_ _p_ _oodoo._

I thought the voice that I heard on Taris was gone.

I frowned and asked to myself, who are you?

The voice laughed within me, _someone who won't be denied a voice._

I sighed, I feel you, you are darkness, I should banish you.

The voice laughed inside my head, _you can't get rid of me. I exist because you exist. Try apprentice, try to get rid of me if you dare._

I sighed, are you my dual nature that the masters talk about, the one that they speak of that we must constantly fight, the one of inner darkness?

The voice chuckled, _You could say that._

I shook my head and sat down, so why is Master Zhar wrong?

 _Because, friends are your strength, friends are your connection, your love for Carth, it is part of your strength, and_ _ _e__ _ _ven your bond with Bastila makes you strong. The Jedi would make you deny what makes you alive, what makes you human or sentient. Remember that Phoenix, you will need to remember that someday.__

Speaking of Bastila, does she know of you?

The voice chuckled, _perhaps._

And then I felt the voice whatever it was had gone away, I frowned. So unusual. I looked at T3, "T3, play Carth's message, please."

Carth's image came up before me and I smiled, I reached a hand and ached within myself to stroke his beard.

 _Ummm….I've never done this before. It was Mission's idea anyway but since I can't see you Phoenix, I've decided the next best thing for now is to exchange correspondence via T3. Oh by the way, T3 misses you too._

T3 beeped quietly within the message.

 _Anyway. I am not sure what else to say, Beautiful. Except, that I really miss you a lot and I know it's wrong because you're a Jedi but I love you. I've tried to deny it before but I can't help it. Any ideas how long the Masters will keep you sequestered? I hope it's not too much longer. Canderous is getting restless, he says he's heard rumors of Mandalorian raiders and he wants to take them down. Yet I can tell you he wants the Mysterious Stranger by his side. All joking aside, how's the training coming? Let me know, okay?_

The message clicked off. I sighed and then said, "It seems to me that Carth is finally accepting you, T3"

The droid beeped his reply,::I suppose so. He doesn't understand me like you do.::

I chuckled, "Because I learned that droid language was useful a long time ago, particularly in repair work." I sighed, "Prepare a reply T3."

I smiled stood up and prepared my most insatiable grin as T3 began recording.

 _Hey Republic, yea we can exchange correspondence although it's discouraged. I say….frack it. I am not a nun, as I pointed out to Canderous earlier. I've been so busy learning the Jedi ways and wanting to succeed, I've forgotten how important you, and the others are to me. I believe in you all, you're part of the reason why I want to be a Jedi. Tell Canderous, the Mysterious Stranger is coming….and we'll kick some Mandalorian raider butt back to Malachor V. As for love, I've decided to throw the proverbial caution to the wind. I love you, and even though that may seem wrong to the Jedi. I can't deny it. To deny it would be fundamentally denying a part of myself. Oh guess what, the other apprentices and Padawans have a nickname for me, you're not going to believe this, but they call me Raven. Yea, from Phoenix to Raven. It's because of my dark raven black hair. Anyway, if you want to….you can call me that, but only when we're alone, not around the others. You never managed to come up with a nickname and since I always call you Republic, Carth, then it's only fair that you have a nickname to match what I call you. I am not sure when I will be finished with the training as an apprentice. Yet, Master Zhar says I am making excellent progress. I've learned a lot, and it's hard but worthwhile. Anyway….May the Force be with you, my most handsomest pilot in the galaxy._

"End recording T3."

The droid beeped and then beeped some more,::You gave him a good message, Phoenix. He will be happy.::

I chuckled, "Happy….yes and so am I."


	31. Ch 30:Dantooine: Jedi training to trial

**Chapter 30: Dantooine: Jedi training to Jedi Trials**

 **~Bastila~**

Something had changed within Phoenix, I could sense it. Some decision she had made, some quiet resolve now colored her perception. I felt the dark taint of Revan within in it. I sighed. I would need to talk to her. Yet, now was probably not the time for it. She had trained for weeks after all and if I pushed Phoenix too hard, she would snap, of that I was certain.

We practiced our sword fighting; Phoenix was a natural at learning the lightsaber forms. She also became a natural at moving meditation. Her body seemed graceful, and calm, breathing as she moved and become one with the universe around her as the lightsaber forms came to her and her breath counted and measured. Master Zhar made Phoenix stay frozen in various combat poses for two to three minutes at a time and breath to bring calm within her body.

Zhar watched our progress and then he walked forward to Phoenix. "In all my years I have never seen one who has mastered the initial training so quickly. You have done in weeks what many cannot do in years. I am honored to welcome you fully into the Jedi Order."

Phoenix nodded and he said. "You have learned much, you have turned to others in the order when you have needed them and have turned to Bastila. Never forget the bond that you have, it will guide you into your next steps in the Order."

I knew what was coming, Phoenix's trials, she would soon be a padawan, that much was obvious. Yet, I wondered if she was ready, I felt Revan's taint in Phoenix, it was faint and muddled but still there. No amount of re-programming would rid Phoenix of Revan or Revan from Phoenix. I felt frustrated, the training had obviously made the taint more pronounced. Had the masters made a mistake? Perhaps, yet when I shared my concerns they reminded me that training Phoenix was the only choice we had left and available to us. The dream that Phoenix and I shared, we had to push forward regardless of the dangers that I now felt. I felt uneasy. I couldn't let Phoenix share that unease, it might make things worse, so I shielded my mind from her and then said to Master Zhar. "Master Zhar, permit me to go, the trial is something that must be faced by Phoenix and Phoenix alone, I cannot help her. "

Phoenix frowned a bit and I said calmly. "I must go and meditate, Phoenix. You will do fine on your trials. I have every confidence you will be a padawan soon."

"But…." Phoenix said, "I need you Bastila."

I sighed. "The Padawan trials must be faced on your own. I cannot aid you. You will be fine, Phoenix. It is obvious that Master Zhar would not have recommended the trials to you if he did not think you were ready."

She looked at me with pleading eyes, begging for me to stay and I left, I needed to meditate, I had to resolve these doubts and what I felt. It could indirectly harm Phoenix, the possibility occurred to me that perhaps Revan's taint was being manifested through me, I was after all the focus that the Masters needed to draw out Revan's memories. I had to meditate, I had to make sure Phoenix remained strong and I had to strengthen myself.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Zhar said calmly. "Soon your apprenticeship will end and you will be granted the title of Padawan, the lowest rank of those within the Jedi Order. Yet first you must prove yourself worthy."

"Master Zhar….I wish..." I paused a moment, "I know so little, I wish to know more about Revan and Malak. After all, my dreams….I ache to know more about those figures that come to me in my dreams."

Master Zhar sighed and looked at me sadly. "I suppose I should, few like to mention their names, but it is just as dangerous to deny that they weren't part of the order. I knew Revan personally, more so than I did Malak. Although Revan often brought Malak for training with me, they were friends after all. S….he was my apprentice, did you know that?"

I shook my head. "No Master, what was Revan like?"

Zhar sighed. "Revan was an exceptional student. Yet always driven. In particular, Revan's hunger to learn seemed insatiable. I should have recognized this as a warning sign. But I perceived the young padawan's lust for knowledge as simple exuberance and eagerness. Revan was my most promising pupil, one I felt sure would someday become a champion of the Jedi Order."

"What happened?"

"The Jedi Order moved too slowly for Revan and Malak; we were too cautious in their eyes. They always sought to learn far quicker than their Masters felt was prudent. It is one thing to understand a lesson, but to truly comprehend it takes a wisdom that only comes with time. Several years ago, when the Mandalorian threat first arose, Revan and Malak were eager to journey to the Outer Rim to defeat the enemy of the Republic. But the Council felt it best if we moved with care and caution. The true threat, the Council feared, had not yet revealed itself. But Revan would not be dissuaded. Charismatic and powerful, it was inevitable many of the Order would flock to Revan's seemingly noble cause. Malak was the first to join his closest friend. Others soon followed, many of our youngest and brightest, intent on saving the galaxy from the Mandalorian threat."

I sighed, "What happened to this noble mission?"

"They were foolish to disregard the Council's wishes. I do not know what happened to Revan, Malak and their followers on the farthest reaches of the Outer Rim, but something corrupted them. Their ideals became twisted, their spirits were tainted and they fell to the dark side. There is a lesson in this, a lesson you would do well to take to heart: the dark side can corrupt even the most noble of Jedi."

I paused in thought. "I…." I pursed my lips in thought, "It seems so tragic, Master Zhar."

He nodded. "It is and it is best to take heed to their tale or you may suffer the same fate."

I nodded. "Is that why Master Vrook is so harsh with me?

Zhar nodded. "You are much older than many of the Jedi apprentices and even Padawan here, but you are a special case, apprentice. Sadly, you will find yourself tempted more by the desires of the Dark Side."

I sighed. "I will heed your lesson, Master Zhar."

He nodded. "I believe it is time for you to begin your trials to become a Padawan."

I nodded. "What must I do?"

"In the traditions and customs of our Order, as handed down from Master to pupil for a thousand generations, you must successfully complete three tests before you earn your place among the Jedi. These tests will see if you have truly mastered the training you have been given, both mental and physical. Upon completing these tests you will pass from apprentice to Padawan, and join the ranks of the Jedi. First I will test your knowledge of the Jedi Code. These tenets must always guide your actions, in everything you do you must always be conscious of their wisdom."

"But I know the code, Master Zhar…."

"Oh then tell it to me, apprentice."

I sighed and recited. "There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is no chaos; there is harmony. There is no death; there is the Force."

Zhar smiled. "And do you know what it means, apprentice? I wish to know if you know the words rather than reciting them."

I sighed. "No emotion….I clear my mind and focus it. If my mind is clear and open to the perceptions of the Force, then I can find peace. Course I am sure there are several interpretations on that, Master Zhar."

Zhar nodded. "Yes and the next lines."

"There is no ignorance…..there is knowledge. Ignorance is darkness, Master Zhar. The light of truth and knowledge shines brightly."

I frowned suddenly, something pricked my thoughts at that interpretation. "Master, if Revan sought knowledge then did he really fall? Knowledge brings light and truth."

Zhar acknowledge my comment. "A good question, apprentice, but knowledge can be used for both good and evil, apprentice."

"Then knowledge is a tool, knowledge isn't..." I paused

 _Shut up!_

My dark voice had returned.

"Isn't what, apprentice?"

 _Do you want Master Zhar to think you are a heretic? Then shut up!_

I sighed. "Knowledge isn't inherently evil or good. It is how it is wielded."

Zhar frowned. "No apprentice, Revan was corrupted by Sith magics. He sought knowledge that was evil. It colored his perceptions and caused him to fall."

 _See...you want to finish your training don't you, Phoenix? Then shut up!_

I sighed and bowed my head and lied. "I understand Master. Some knowledge is best left alone." I disagreed, knowledge was knowledge. It wasn't evil or good. Although, that knowledge might tempt a person to do evil, in the end, knowledge was neither good nor bad. Yet, I could see I could risk everything by stating this.

He nodded. "Yes, my apprentice, now the next line."

"There is no passion; there is serenity. Passion…." I paused. that was a hard line for me, I couldn't understand how passion was fully bad either. I could understand in some instances it could be bad. Yet, being driven by certain types of passion could be good.

My dark voice chuckled within my head, _N_ _ _ow you see the flaws of the Jedi.__

I had to give some answer, an answer to appease, Master Zhar though, and not the one I felt was true, "Passion particularly unbridled passion, will drive you into paths that are forbidden. Do not cling to it, calmness and peaceful serenity will drive passion from you."

"Very good, apprentice. The next line."

"There is no chaos; there is harmony. The galaxy is in chaos, Master Zhar. Malak has driven the Force and the galaxy overall into chaos. There must be harmony and balance." I paused and said firmly. "I will restore that balance….Master Zhar. I will bring harmony and restore balance. There must be order and balance in the galaxy and Malak has ruined it."

Zhar raised an eyebrow. "Have you seen a vision of this, apprentice?"

I shook my head. "No Master Zhar, but I speak truth. It is my destiny to do this, is it not?"

Zhar nodded. "It is. It is also a heavy burden, apprentice. Yet it is apparent you understand very well this line of the Jedi code. Now the last line."

"There is no death; there is the Force. The Force transcends death, it is after all life. All life dies but life also is reborn and grows and continues yet again and again, united by all."

Zhar nodded. "So it seems you know the code, apprentice. You have learned your studies well, apprentice. It will not be long before you are a full member of our Order. But first you must pass the second test, and learn about the most prized possession of a Jedi, the very symbol of our Order: the lightsaber. The lightsaber is the traditional weapon of our Order. It is a symbol of a Jedi's skill, dedication and authority, and each lightsaber is as individual as the Jedi who wields it. The blade is made of pure energy, focused by polished crystals in the hilt. As the second test, each Jedi must construct his lightsaber with his own hands. And now it is your time. Speak with Master Dorak and he will guide you through the choosing of a crystal."

I smiled softly. "Yes Master Zhar."

I wandered off, and found Master Dorak and he smiled. "Ah, you have come, young apprentice, at Master Zhar's bidding. He sees great promise in you... as do I. The time has come for you to choose the color of your lightsaber. This color also reflects your demeanor and position within the Order."

"A single color?"

"A Jedi is not restricted to a single color. Rather, that color is a badge of pride for the Jedi path it signifies. Should you have an appropriate crystal, you may change your blade to anything you desire. But first you should learn of the different paths a Jedi may take."

"What positions are there?"

"Blue is the color of the Jedi Guardian. This Jedi battles against the forces of evil and the dark side. They focus more on combat training and use of the lightsaber. Yellow is the color of the Jedi Sentinel. This Jedi ferrets out deceit and injustice, bringing it to light. They focus less on combat and more on other skills and abilities. Green is the color of the Jedi Consular. This Jedi seeks to bring balance to the universe. They mediate between other groups, using their powers to end conflict and preserve peace."

I sighed and thought hard on this, I wanted to bring balance like a Consular but I also wanted to focus on combat. Yet, I knew in the end that combat was the only thing that would end Malak's reign and I said firmly. "I want to be a Jedi Gaurdian!"

Dorak smiled softly. "Indeed. We shall see. I will now ask you questions, and your responses will indicate which class you lean most towards. A woman and her small child are beset by a desperate-looking group of thugs. They are menacing her with weapons and she screams to you for help. What do you do?"

"I attack the thugs and save the woman and her child."

"Hm... indeed. Very well, on to the next question. You are in combat with a Dark Jedi allied with the Sith. There is a pause in the combat. What do you do?"

"A pause in combat means I should keep at them and attack."

"Yes, I suspected as much. Now for the next question. There is a locked door and your goal lies on the other side. What do you do?"

"I bring down the barrier of a door and go forward."

"I am beginning to see a pattern here, apprentice. I have a feeling about what you would be best at. But first, the final question. You are the head of an Enclave on a contested world. The Dark Jedi have infiltrated and are causing unrest across the planet. What do you do?"

"I go after them and hunt them down to bring justice and peace back to the planet."

Dorak nodded. "You seem to be suited towards being a Jedi guardian, Phoenix Star. But which color and path do you believe yourself most suited to, apprentice?

"I choose…."

 _You are already a warrior, Phoenix._

Damn that voice, it always seemed to manage to persuade me to go different paths, I knew what I wanted, I wanted to be a guardian.

 _Malak is expecting a warrior, not a balance maker. Seek balance Phoenix, seek the higher powers of the Force to bring peace and to bring that order you seek to the galaxy._

"Green, the path of a Jedi Consular," I bowed my head reverently, why was it that darn voice was so damn convincing?

Dorak smiled and handed me a green crystal and the parts for a lightsaber. "Go speak to Master Zhar again and he will instruct you in how to construct it."

I returned to Master Zhar."Ahh a green crystal. Knowing your skill with a melee weapon, I would have expected you to be a guardian."

"I felt otherwise, Master Zhar."

He nodded."Go over to the bench, all the tools are there for you to craft your blade."

I went over to the bench and closed my eyes and using the Force I slowly moved the parts together, my energy flowed into the crystal and then my eyes opened, the green blade sprang to life. I held it and twirled it around, getting use to the feel and the balance of the weapon that now lay in my hands. For me, it was a pivotal moment; I was a Jedi, not just in training but also in action with my newly crafted lighsaber. I grinned; I couldn't wait to show Carth. He would be proud, I was certain of it.

I smiled softly as I showed, Zhar the blade and he nodded. "You have done extremely well in constructing your lightsaber, apprentice. Your crystal seems to have been set perfectly. It is rare indeed for that to happen the first time one constructs their lightsaber. These crystals are very rare, found only in certain caves strong in the Force. By adding crystals to your lightsaber you can alter or enhance its properties. There have even been unconfirmed rumors of certain Force-sensitive caves here on Dantooine that may hold these crystals."

"Crystals?"

"They can modify simple things, such as the color of your blade, or complex ones, such as crystals that reputedly increase the strength of the beam."

"If I have the time Master, I would be interested in seeing if I can find these caves."

Zhar nodded. "But you must learn first to use your lightsaber and take care when drawing it. Your lightsaber identifies you as a member of the Jedi Order. With such recognition comes honor and respect... and the attention of dangerous enemies. The Sith and Dark Jedi will seek to destroy you, Apprentice. And you must prove yourself worthy in battle against a foe who wields lightsaber. Are you ready to face the final challenge, Apprentice?"

I nodded. "I wish to take my final trial, Master Zhar."

He nodded. "For every Jedi the threat of the dark side is always present. You must truly understand this before you are accepted into the Order. You must see the corruption of the dark side for yourself. Even here on Dantooine there are places where the dark side holds sway, twisting and tainting nature itself. The ancient grove once used for deep meditation by the Jedi is now tainted, a wave of darkness perverts the region around it. The kath hounds in the area have become savage and ruthless. They have become a threat to the settlers, a threat the Jedi have promised to stop."

"Why do I have a feeling that there is something you're not telling me?"

Zhar smiled softly. "The kath hounds are but a symptom of the true problem. You must journey into the grove and confront the true source of the darkness. That is your task."

"Is there anything else you can tell me?"

"I can say no more; some things you must see for yourself. None of the other Jedi at the academy are permitted to help you in this task. But remember this, my young apprentice: a Jedi acts with patience and care, and those on the dark path are not always lost forever. The dark side still taints the ancient grove. Your lessons cannot continue until the spreading corruption of the dark side has been stopped. This is your task, apprentice. May the Force be with you. "

I walked from the training room, and I passed by Master Dorak, I showed him my blade, "Ahh well done apprentice. Although I sense you haven't just come by to show me your newly constructed blade. What is it you wish to ask me?"

"Well….I was wondering if I could access the archives."

His eyes went wide as if I had asked for his help to rob a Coruscanti bank. He then shook his head. "This facility is a training academy. The archives here are restricted to those who have attained the rank of Master. We must protect overeager padawans from being exposed to dangerous knowledge. The pursuit of knowledge is a noble goal, but there are some things that require the wisdom of a Master to truly understand. But why is it you wish to seek the archives, apprentice?"

"I want to know more about Revan and Malak. Since my dreams have them in it. I don't fully understand why I am dreaming about individuals I have never met. I also thought perhaps knowing them will aid me in understanding the dreams. Plus the knowledge will aid me in my trial, since I am supposed to clean the grove of the Dark Side."

"I will begin forty years ago with the war of Exar Kun. Like Malak and Revan, Exar Kun was a Jedi who fell to the dark side and led an army against the Jedi and the Republic. Exar Kun was defeated, but the war left both the Republic and our own Order severely weakened. For twenty years we struggled to rebuild, trying to erase the scars of the terrible conflict. "

"And I assume the Mandalorian wars started after that time?"

Dorak nodded. "Indeed so, apprentice. Twenty years ago the Mandalorians, aware the Republic was in a weakened state, began conquering small worlds on the Outer Rim. They were careful to choose only planets outside the Republic's jurisdiction. After much debate, the Senate chose not to intervene. As long as the Mandalorians avoided planets that were members of the Republic itself, there would be no retaliation. "

I looked a bit upset. "They should have protected them. My family, my world was attacked by the Mandalorians on the Outer Rim. If the Republic had gotten involved, perhaps….perhaps my family wouldn't have been killed."

Dorak eyes took on a look of sadness. "Yes, and Revan felt the same but….could you blame the Republic? The memory of war was fresh in everyone's mind, nobody was eager to relive the horrors in a campaign against the Mandalorians. But in the end it was unavoidable. The Mandalorians stockpiled resources from their conquered worlds, preparing for a massive assault. Seven years ago they launched a simultaneous attack on three separate sectors of Republic space. The Senate had no choice but to retaliate with the entire Republic fleet. The Mandalorian Wars had begun. "

I shook my head. "Which could have been avoided, if the Republic had defended the Outer Rim in the first place."

Dorak sighed. "And that decision comes so easily to you, apprentice. Please hear the rest of the history before you make such rash decisions."

I gave Dorak a discontented look. "Alright, I'll listen but it still doesn't convince me that Revan and Malak didn't have the right idea going to war."

"The Republic petitioned the Jedi Council for aid, but there were many factors to consider before we allowed ourselves to be drawn into another conflict so soon after the war with Exar Kun. While the Jedi Council preached patience, there were many among our Order who were eager for us to join the battle. Two young Knights in particular demanded immediate action: Revan and Malak. They rallied many of the Jedi to their cause and, against the wishes of their Masters, joined the Republic fleet battling the Mandalorians. Revan was a brilliant military leader, and the Republic fleet began to win victory after victory. Four years ago the Mandalorians surrendered unconditionally."

"Then Revan and Malak did the right thing."

Dorak nodded. "No one is denying that Revan was one of the keys to defeating the Mandalorians… Revan and Malak were heroes, the great saviors of the Republic. A third of the Republic fleet was under their direct command... and them something happened. but something happened out there on the Outer Rim."

I looked at Master Dorak, I had to admit I was fascinated, "What happened?"

"Instead of returning after the war's end, the ships under Revan's command went deep into unexplored space. They claimed to be searching for the last remnants of the Mandalorian fleet. All contact was lost. For many months it was assumed some great disaster had befallen the entire fleet. Everyone thought they were dead. There were unsubstantiated rumors of Revan and Malak being seen on a number of different planets during these months – scattered sightings that were never confirmed."

"Where did Revan go?"

Dorak shrugged. "No one knows for sure. Perhaps they simply went far beyond the edges of Republic space. Maybe they found previously undiscovered hyperspace routes to the ends of the galaxy. Three years ago, Revan and Malak returned at the head of a massive invasion fleet. Revan had assumed the title of Sith Lord; the hero had become a conqueror."

I frowned. "That doesn't make sense….to be for the freedom of the galaxy and then become the same threat as the Mandalorians. Unless…."

Dorak frowned. "Unless what apprentice?"

"Unless Revan believed his actions had a purpose."

Dorak nodded. "Perhaps apprentice...but what purpose he had is not clear. But the main question most of us had was the fleet that Revan managed to wield against the Republic. Some of the ships in the Sith fleet are those that were under Revan's command during the Mandalorian Wars. But many more are of an alien design we have never seen before. The source of this massive fleet is one of the many things about the Sith we cannot explain. It seems impossible to have created it in such a short time, yet we cannot deny its existence. The source of the Sith soldiers is, unfortunately, much easier to understand. Initially the bulk of the Sith force were former Republic soldiers who had served under Revan. With each conquest thousands more flocked to join the invaders, swelling their numbers. Even many of our own Order have betrayed us, lured by Sith promises of riches and power."

"And Carth told me that the only thing that is holding off the Sith is Bastila."

Dorak nodded. "For two years the Sith were all but invincible. Fortunately, Bastila and her Battle Meditation allowed the Republic to win a few key victories and kept the Sith from total triumph. In desperation we set a trap for the Dark Lord. Bastila was with the strike team that tried to capture Revan, as you probably know. She was there at Revan's end. That was a few months ago, but things have not improved. Malak has stepped in and assumed the mantle of Dark Lord for himself, though he is far from Revan's equal in strategy or tactics. Still, his fleet continues to grow in both ships and soldiers. If we do not find some way to stop the Sith soon, Malak will overwhelm us with sheer numbers. Those who do not learn from this history are doomed to repeat it, or so they say. As Chronicler of the Academy here on Dantooine, I find your quest for knowledge admirable. But I do not want to overwhelm you with the long history of the Jedi Order. You should ponder the history of Revan; it contains many lessons you may need if we hope to defeat Malak and the Sith."

"What am I suppose to learn from this?"

"Revan's tale shows us how even the greatest of Jedi can fall to the dark side. You must always be on guard against the evil that dwells within you. Think hard upon this lesson."

I stated firmly. "Well Master Dorak I will find a way to stop the Sith!"

Dorak then said firmly back to me. "Your confidence is admirable, but you must guard against pride and arrogance. These lead to the dark side."

I am not sure what arrogance and pride, Dorak was talking about, because they wanted me to stop Malak and the Sith and every time I asserted my destiny, I got slapped down. I left Master Dorak, I really wanted to read the archives, and was only satisfied with a brief measure of history from him. I suppose I needed to attend to my trial to cleanse the grove.

"Ahh Apprentice I trust your training goes well?"

I looked down to find Master Vandar."Greetings Master. My training is going well."

"I have faith that you will achieve the rank of Padawan soon. Master Zhar is most impressed with your progress."

I paused a moment and said. "Master what can you tell me about Bastila and about Revan and Malak? I know Bastila lead the strike team against him."

"Bastila will be a great Jedi someday. Even among the Masters and the Council it is rare to find one so skilled in the art of Battle Meditation. Bastila herself does not like to talk about her role in the death of such a promising young Jedi as Revan. His death upset her greatly. But Bastila knew she had to set her personal feelings aside for the sake of the galaxy and the Republic. The Force is strong with her now, and without her skill in Battle Meditation we would have lost this war long ago. "

"Master Vandar….what can you tell me about Revan and Malak, since I dreamed about them, I feel that it is important that I learn more about them."

"I knew Revan as a promising young pupil. Revan was strong in the Force, but also headstrong and proud. Such traits are not unusual in a Padawan. Perhaps that was why I did not see the true extent of the danger. Many of the young Jedi admired Revan, including Malak. When Revan set off to challenge the Mandalorians, Malak was the first to join the cause. And when Revan fell to the dark side it was inevitable Malak would fall as well. "

"Are you saying that Revan was responsible for Malak's fall?"

"Revan was always the leader, the more powerful of the pair. When Revan fell we had hoped the Sith threat was ended. But Malak quickly assumed Revan's role, and embraced the dark side power as fully as his old master ever did. Now Malak leads the Sith armada against the Republic. Hate and vengeance for his master's death draw Malak ever further down the path of the dark side, fueling his powers until they surpass those of his old master. Only you and Bastila together can stop Malak now."

"But Master, why is it up to me and Bastila to stop Malak? I can understand Bastila's role as she defeated Revan but….why me?"

Vandar sighed. "Your strength in the Force, apprentice plus your bond ties you to Bastila and therefore you both are destined to stop Malak."

"And this bond….it makes no sense. I understand the bond happened on Taris, but why?"

Vandar chuckled lightly. "Who can understand the will of the Force, apprentice? It is the will of the Force you are bonded to Bastila."

I sighed. "Will of the Force aside, this sounds oddly convenient."

Vandar sighed. "You should have more trust in the Force, rather than desiring physical explanations, apprentice."

"Yea, maybe I should. Yet, from what I've read, Force bonds usually only form between padawans and masters or during times of duress and pain. I don't recall either happening with me and Bastila."

"Are you sure, apprentice? From what I've heard from Bastila regarding your time on Taris, you were injured during a fight and she took care of you."

"I….well I guess a bond could have formed during that time, but it still seems rather convenient."

Vandar said. "Convenience or not, apprentice your destines are linked."

I sighed, I wasn't completely satisfied with the answer, it was definitely something I needed to talk to Bastila about.

I bowed and left Master Vandar, I seemed to be getting a wealth of information regarding Revan and Malak and I was getting ready to leave to go to the grove.

"I see you insist on wandering the halls of our Enclave when you should be busy studying your lessons."

"Master Vrook….I am….my trials…. But I am delayed….by you and the other masters."

Vrook snorted. "It appears that soon you will achieve the rank of Padawan. Master Zhar is most impressed with your progress. But I cannot help but wonder if you move forward too quickly."

I stared at him measuring his coldness with a firm coldness of my own, "If I am moving too quickly then tell me how to move more slowly. Teach me Master, instruct me if you wish."

He sighed. "What do you wish to know, apprentice?"

"Well I just spoke with Master Vandar….I wish to know more regarding Bastila, Revan and Malak as well."

"Bastila? The young Jedi holds great promise... and great danger. She can do much for both the Republic and the Council. Without her skill in Battle Meditation the Sith armada would have conquered the galaxy long ago. But despite her command of the Force Bastila is still young. She is a Jedi, but she has not attained the rank of Master. The Council would do well to remember this before we lay the fate of the galaxy on her slender shoulders. As for Revan and Malak….Revan was once a promising Padawan. But ever eager to learn more about the Force, Revan sought knowledge of ancient Sith magics, foolishly ignoring the dangerous lure of the dark side. When the Mandalorian invasion came, Revan seized the opportunity it presented. Many Jedi flocked to the Outer Rim to follow the charismatic young Knight... and many fell under the sway of the dark side."

Finally I felt like I might get some of the answers I desired. "Master Vrook, what happened to Revan on the outer rim, what happened that corrupted him?"

"I do not believe Revan and Malak were corrupted on the Outer Rim. They had begun their journey down the dark path long before the Mandalorian threat appeared. Here on Dantooine they discovered a sinister cave, a place where the strength of the dark side overwhelms the light. Perhaps this discovery was what first corrupted them... or perhaps they sought the cave out because they were already corrupted. Whatever the explanation, the Order was unable to turn them back to the light. Had the Council taken more decisive action in this matter, perhaps Revan and Malak could have been stopped. But in this we failed."

I raised an eyebrow, behind that hard cold facade, Vrook's voice had a tone of sadness, our eyes met and I saw the sadness in his eyes. I gulped and then said. "You often seem angry with me Master Vrook. Have I displeased you?"

"If you find me overly critical, perhaps it is because you do not fully understand what is at stake. For fifteen thousand years the Republic has brought peace and stability to the galaxy. Now the Republic may be destroyed because we, the Jedi, have failed them. Revan and Malak were paragons of the ideals the Order seeks to uphold, yet they succumbed to the temptations of the dark side. When Revan fell, Malak took up the mantle of Dark Lord of the Sith. Should Malak be stopped, what is to stop another Jedi from taking his place? This is the burden we Masters must carry. Only through strict training and relentless lessons can we prevent the Dark Master from being reborn. That is why the Order can brook no failure in our apprentices and pupils. That is why I can accept nothing but perfection from you."

"But…." I looked at Vrook, "perfection is an unrealistic expectation. No individual is perfect, putting that much of a burden on me is improbable if not impractical."

He snorted. "What do you know of such things, apprentice? Off with you….finish your training."

I sighed and shook my head as I wandered off, there was absolutely no way I could please Vrook even though I had tried to be polite.

I walked out of the Enclave there on the landing pad was the Hawk, I decided that if I couldn't have Jedi help me with my trial then perhaps my friends could at least join me.

Sitting on the ramp was Carth. His eyes lit up when he saw me. "My Raven…." He ran and embraced me in a bone crushing hug. I laughed. "It's a good thing I am a Jedi, or you'd crush me."

He looked around making sure we were alone and then his lips found mine. His warm breath within my mouth and then separated. I gasped. "Take it easy…..Republic…" His eyes went towards my pants and I backed away. "Carth….please…..I can't."

He frowned. "Can't….why not?"

"I am on a task from the Jedi council. I have to finish my trial….to become a Padawan. I maybe a hypocrite, Republic but, I can't….I want to….well...rip off your clothing and make love to you more than anything but….I must finish my trial. Once that is over….well we can do whatever we both wish. But since…." I paused, "Come with me….help me finish my trial. I can't have a Jedi help me. But you're not a Jedi."

He sighed. "I'd be more than honored to accompany you on your trial."

I smiled softly. "Plus...I agreed to help Canderous clear out those Mandalorian raiders you mentioned."

Carth groaned and I laughed. "You're jealous, aren't you?"


	32. 31 Dantooine: Juhani and Raiders part 1

**Chapter 31: Dantooine: Juhani and Mandalorian Raiders Part 1**

 **~Phoenix~**

"Cool lightsaber, Nix." Mission said eyeing my newly minted green blade as I ignited it and showed her the glowing pulsing blade. She paused a moment and said. "So...training to be a Jedi, what's that like anyway?"

I sat in the dining area of the Hawk, trying to stomach the food dispenser's food. It tasted a little bit better but not by much. It was tolerable. Yet, now it didn't have much flavor at all. It needed something to flavor it up, either Tomo-spice or even some Boontaspice.

I shouldn't have left repairs to T3. The droid wouldn't have known that the dispenser needed food to actually have some sort of flavor or taste, course I had been busy training as a Jedi so I hadn't really the time to get the dispenser to work properly.

I sighed."There has to be a power somewhere in the Force that actually makes food taste good."

Mission chuckled lightly. "Yea….I somehow doubt that."

I shrugged. "Training is training, Mission. I can't really describe it too well, training to use the Force...well it's like opening my eyes and seeing the universe is a bit vaster than I thought it was."

"So what's the Force like, anyway?"

I smiled softly, Mission was curious, poor girl was Force blind. I suppose it couldn't hurt to try and answer her question. I did want to see my friends before I went off to face my trial and I had missed Mission.

"The Force is life….Mission." I paused and intoned solumnly. "It sings….it hums….it vibrates, and it's a song. I can feel it everywhere. Its influence is in everything, even you. I know you can't feel it, I wish you could Mission but it's beautiful."

"More beautiful than me?" I turned around to see Carth enter the room, he had his blasters ready. He was ready to go and I said calmly. "You have a strong Force aura around you, Carth. I am surprised you can't feel the Force."

He shrugged. "Yea well...most people on Telos were washed outs from the Jedi. The Jedi tested me once as a kid."

"And?"

"Low to moderate ability….but not enough to be a Jedi. The Onasi line has had Force sensitives in the past, but it skips a lot, like good or bad hands of Pazaak."

I chuckled lightly. "That's an interesting analogy, Carth. Yet, I doubt you're completely Force blind, Republic because after all you did find me."

He smiled and gave me a quick but very passionate peck on my lips. Yep it was official, we were definitely a couple.

Mission made gagging noises. "Gross…..can't you guys suck face elsewhere. Seriously you're as bad as Lena and Griff."

I smiled softly at Mission's outburst. "Well we really do need to get going. I do have a trial I have to complete."

Mission moaned. "I really wish you'd take me with you, Nix."

"I promise, once I become a Padawan we can go look for those crystal caves Master Zhar mentioned. We can do it together, you, me and Zaalbar. You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

Mission grinned. "That sounds like fun, Nix. And I will hold you to that promise."

I smiled. "Although the crystals are supposed to be for lightsabers. I am pretty sure a few crystals strung up together would probably make a really nice necklace for you to wear."

Mission came over and gave me a big hug. "I missed you, Nix. The Hawk hasn't been the same without you."

"I've missed you too, Mish. Anyway...I'll see you soon. Probably during my Padawan ceremony. You have to come; I've done some reading on Padawan ceremonies. They are either very complex to very simple. I am probably way too focused on the trappings of the ceremony but….sometimes a little pomp and circumstance is a good thing. It raises hopes and gives encouragement. After Taris, I think we all need a little bit of that. In fact I plan on insisting on it from the Masters."

Mission smiled. "I am looking forward to it, Nix."

I gave Mission another firm squeeze and I turned to Carth. "So is Canderous ready to go?"

Carth nodded. "Yea, he is...he's waiting for us outside the Hawk."

We walked through the Hawk, Zaalbar came up to me and held up his bowcaster and moaned. "I am coming too Phoenix Star."

I held up my hand. "What about Mission?"

"Mission will be fine. I owe a lifedebt to you, Phoenix Star. You cannot go through a very important trial without me."

I sighed, I was sorely tempted to raise my hand and use the Force and persuade Zaalbar to stay put on the Hawk because Zaalbar needed to stay with Mission. All that fuss about being grown up, Mission was still a fourteen cycle old sentient. She might act like an adult in someways but she was still a child. _Shoot, I was fifteen when my father sent me off to haggle and sell wine in the mid-rim. It was a coming of age thing; my father wanted me to take my place in the adult world. I came back and found death and destruction by the Mandalorians, some coming of age that was. I had to grow up, even though I didn't feel like it. That's probably why I have a connection with Mission, she reminds me of myself. At least Mission had her brother for a little while. I didn't even have my brother, my younger sib, was killed. Mission will be fine, she's had to grow up. I just want to baby her because I didn't have anyone to take care of me, not even a wookiee. I wanted her path to adulthood to be smoother than mine. Yet, Taris proves that I can't shield her or protect her from everything._

Zaalbar was right about Mission. Using the Force to convince Zaalbar to stay wouldn't be fair to the wookiee, he had sworn a lifedebt to me after all. It was his devotion to what had happened on Taris that bound him to me. He recognized the importance of the Jedi trial. After all, wookiees had coming of age trials and ceremonies all the time on Kashyyyk. Zaalbar recognized this as a coming of age trial. He was respecting me by saying he wanted to come. So I resisted my hasty desire of using the Force and I sighed, "You may come Zaalbar"

He moaned, "Thank you Phoenix Star, I was afraid you would say no."

* * *

 **~Master Dorak~**

"Master Dorak…..I want to thank you for that delightful holocron collection you sent to me. The Jedi and Jedi Masters of the Echani."

I smiled softly at the Echani senator, "It was my pleasure Senator Artemis Sandren."

"So have you heard from my daughter lately? I know that it is discouraged to contact family within the order. I haven't seen or heard from her in so many years, and I am now an old woman. Time goes by so very fast. I was so proud to hear that she had been given the position of Jedi Historian on Coruscant. She does the Sandren family great honor to Eshan, particularly to me. She bears my face well to the Jedi, even though…." The senator paused, "She is only half Echani."

I nodded. "She is a fine historian, Senator Artemis. She has collected a lot of knowledge of the order and is very through in doing so."

The senator chuckled lightly."That sounds like my little Atri. She always was so persistent and driven to whatever task she was given, but that was when I remembered her as a child."

"Master Atris is a fine Jedi Master, Senator Artemis and I think….I might be able to arrange a visit so you can see her."

The senator's eyes brightened. "Really….that would be wonderful." The senator then sighed, "There is another reason I have contacted you Master Dorak."

I frowned. "Oh?"

"It seems that military intelligence is poking a bit more into an identification restoration you had for a refugee of the Mandalorian wars. I can't remember the name of the refugee, you said she had amnesia and that the Jedi were able to restore her memory and you needed my help in restoring her identity to the Republic since she was deemed lost."

I raised an eyebrow.

Artemis sighed. "Star….I think it was. Yes, I believe her name was Star, or was that her last name? Anyway, I wasn't expecting this much hassle from the fleet intelligence over her. They demanded all paperwork regarding her. I had no warning and I was forced to turn over whatever documents I had. What's going on Master Dorak?"

I paused a moment trying to consider what to say and I had no answer to give. Yet, any more knowledge than what the senator already had wasn't good. Force forgive me. I slowly lifted my hand, and the Force rumbled within me as I extended it and waved it across the galaxy and I called upon the Force to persuade the senator, "There is no problem. This is normal procedure for refugees and you wondered why you called."

The senator's eyes glassed over a bit. "I suppose this isn't really a problem and a normal procedure for refugees." The senator shrugged and then frowned a bit, "You know I am not even sure why I called to bother you over this."

"You called to talk about your daughter and the collection I gave you."

Senator Sandren chuckled in good-natured humor. "Of course, I must be getting old and senile. Anyway if you can arrange a visit with my daughter that would make this old senator extremely happy."

"Of course Senator Sandren, I would be more than happy to do so."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Exiting the Enclave, it didn't really feel like I had left it. The same brown tones and hues that were found in the Enclave were found outside in nature. Nice trick. The Jedi who constructed this Enclave wanted everyone to feel like the Enclave always existed as a natural part of Dantooine. I thought about my dream with Revan and Malak. The Jedi had apparently had studied the ruins, I remembered Malak's voice. _T_ _ _he ancient Jedi sealed this archway.__ Depending on what Malak meant by ancient Jedi, that could easily have stretched back to at least fifteen thousand years perhaps more, give or take. Revan was a scholar according to the Masters. Maybe he had read something about these ruins, now if I could just get to Dorak's archives, I could find out more about those ruins. I know….I could have T3 slice into the archives. Yea, I would be breaking rules in the process, but I was already breaking rules by being in a relationship with Carth. What were a few more broken rules? However, maybe I should hold off till Bastila and I went to the ruins to begin with. It would be a waste of effort breaking rules to get into the archives only to find out that all the info I needed was in the ruins to begin with.

Carth interrupted my train of thought."Phoenix?"

"Eh?"

He laughed. "You're thinking, aren't you? Did you know that you make me nervous when you're thinking?"

"Oh sorry, I was just pondering over quaint and curious volumes of forgotten Jedi lore."

He chuckled a bit, "And quotes the raven…nevermore."

I groaned, leave it to Carth to rub my new nickname with some old poem, "Old Coruscanti poetry…..you know my father made me memorize that damn thing and….I am sorry my thinking makes you nervous. I can't help it that my mind is a busy place."

Canderous said firmly. "It is good your mind is busy, Phoenix. It is a sign of a strong leader, you should be grateful Carth to have a someone whose mind is like a dejarik board."

Carth shook his head. "Yea...but you don't know Phoenix like I do Canderous, when her mind thinks it always gets us into some form of trouble."

I coughed. "Ummm you do realize it's rude to talk about me like I am not here and it's not my fault you two follow me into trouble. You honestly, don't have to…." I grinned, "You know that all three of you could go right back to the Enclave, sit in the Hawk and….miss out on all the fun."

Canderous laughed and looked over at Carth. "She's right you know."

Carth looked at me. "Damn it woman, you really know how to manipulate people."

I grinned. "What can I say….it's a talent I have."

Zaalbar was quiet and he shook his head. I think banter wasn't really a wookiee or a Zaalbar thing.

We were walking through the courtyard; it smelled damp like a rain had recently came through. Course, considering that this planet was a farming world rain probably came often. It felt alive to me, pulsing with the Force. Although it left one nagging question why would there be ruins here? Malak had said the ruins pulsed with the Dark Side. Opening the ruins, Malak had stepped in and some sort of Dark Side artifact opened up. Yea, why? What was so significant about this planet? Darn it I really needed to know more about the history of this planet.

Carth and Zaalbar both suddenly cried out."Phoenix, watch ou..."

I wasn't paying too much attention and bumped into a Jedi. I blushed. "Sorry….."

He chuckled a bit. "Quite alright, apprentice. It is apparent that your mind is far from where it should be. Focus apprentice, because it is good sometimes, to stop and reflect on the beauty of nature and the Force."

I nodded.

"I am sorry; I tend to get carried away... I do not believe we have met, apprentice. My name is Nemo."

I chuckled. "Then it appears we both have something in common. I am carried away in my own thoughts and you're carried away taking in the aura of the Force around this planet."

Nemo laughed. "You are very astute, apprentice. So how goes your studies, my young friend?"

"I have been given a task by the Council..."

"Indeed. What is it you would like from me?"

"What do you know of the tainted grove?"

He frowned. "The Council has told you nothing of the grove?"

"I know it is tainted by the dark side."

"Do not be so quick to judge circumstances about which you are ignorant. Not everything may be as transparent as you would believe. The grove can be found to the south and east in the plains. But be wary of kath hounds, they may be agitated by the power in the grove."

"By the way what kind of name is Nemo?"

Nemo laughed and shook his head. "You put a lot of undue importance in names. You should realize that the value you put in a name is misleading, young one. You of all people should remember that."

"Are you a Jedi?" I had realized that I may have assumed he was a Jedi, after all when I first arrived Belaya had thought I was a padawan, so I asked just to be sure.

"Indeed, my young friend that I am. I have served the Council for many years, and have seen many apprentices pass through this Enclave."

"Many apprentices? Did you know or see Revan or Malak?"

"Yes….I am familiar with those fallen Jedi, as well as Exar Kun. I am afraid Dantooine has had a bad reputation with fallen Jedi."

"What of Revan and Malak?"

Nemo sighed. "Revan was a powerful Jedi, apprentice. Malak was Revan's Sith apprentice. But most masters agree that Revan was the leader and that Revan was the focus for all that has happened in the galaxy quite recently till their death. Even in death, the Dark Lord Revan's life left a powerful wake behind them that even Malak can't fully erase or eclipse. So which Jedi are you wishing to know more about, Revan or Malak?"

"Well since the masters say Revan was the leader, so I guess I wish to know more about Revan."

Nemo nodded. "The histories are not too clear on who Revan was, if Revan was even a man or a woman. Some say, that Revan's power and influence went beyond even male or female, and that Revan was simply Revan, and it mattered little whether Revan was a man or a woman. Yet, Revan preferred it that way. Revan wished to be as ambiguous as possible. It was rumored when Revan left the order; the fallen Jedi asked their first and their last master who was a chronicler and historian to alter their records."

"Who was this master? Not Zhar or Master Dorak I would assume."

"It is unclear who this master was, apprentice as Revan's master not only altered Revan's history but altered theirs as well. It was a final act of defiance as both went off to war against the Mandalorians. Some say it was Master Arren Kae, others say it was a Master named Kreia. The possibility also remains that the two are simply a composite of one master overall. Either way this master was Revan's first and last master and she had a powerful connection and bond with her padawan. Revan had many masters though. I would trust little of Revan's intimate history, apprentice."

"But I just spent time learning Revan's history from the masters."

Nemo chuckled."Oh that history is good enough as the Masters here taught and knew Revan personally."

"You seem to know a lot, are you a Council Member?"

"I think, perhaps, you place an undue importance on rank and hierarchy. Understandable, but regrettable also. We each serve in our place, high and low."

Finally Canderous spoke up. "Bah….enough of this, Phoenix, I admire Revan for his skill and his cunning but I want to know if this Jedi knows anything regarding the Mandalorian raiders."

Nemo shook his head. "Mandalorian, if you are seeking the raiders then, yes. They have been preying on the settlers in the surrounding farms. Stealing food, money, weapons... Jon was hit really hard recently… He lost his daughter.

Canderous snorted. "You Republics are too weak. You should protect what you want to keep, otherwise someone stronger will take it."

Nemo looked sadden. "Perhaps, perhaps. But not everyone in the galaxy is a warrior like you."

He turned back to me. "The raiders were not a problem before... But now it would seem prudent to be rid of them. If you could accomplish this, it would not harm your training and the settlers would greatly appreciate it. Jon is currently waiting to petition the Council. He is on the path north of here. He might be able to tell you more about what had happened. Can I help you with anything else?"

"I will see to it, I wouldn't be a proper Jedi, if I didn't, but I also heard Master Zhar said there are caves on Dantooine with lightsaber crystals."

"Ah, yes, those caves. Those caves are dangerous for the unwary. Kinrath spiders infest the places. They are attracted by the colors and heat given off by the crystals, I think. It is a pity... Those caves are strong in the Force. "

"Thank you Nemo, your knowledge has been helpful."

He smiled. "May the Force be with you, apprentice."

I gave Nemo a customary bow out of respect. That was indeed interesting, I liked history and to be told that Revan's history may have been murkier than it was left me wondering more about the vision, that me and Bastila had shared. Just who exactly was under those robes and mask? Man? Woman? Maybe even some mutated monster? I cringed, thinking about that made me think of those damn rakghouls that were found on Taris. Don't be daft Phoenix, if Revan was a rakghoul….did Sith Lords eat the raw flesh of sentients? Err, maybe if they were insane. Carth did say that Dark Jedi were capable of monstrous acts, like striping a mind of one's memories. Both thoughts made my stomach turn in revulsion.

We walked north and ran into a man and a woman. The man smiled softly. "Greetings, friend. I think I can safely assume you are a member of the Jedi Order. Has the Council agreed to hear our petition?"

I shook my head negatively. "I am sorry. I do not know."

"Oh, I see. I am mistaken. How may I be of assistance, Master Jedi?"

I chuckled. "Don't get me wrong, it would be nice to be called Master Jedi but…." I bowed my head lightly, "I am no Jedi Master, I am simply an apprentice."

"Ah, but you are still a Jedi."

"Yes. Who are you and why do you seek an audience with the council?"

"My name is Gar. Me and my fine wife Rilka here..."

Rilka smiled."A pleasure…."

"... live on one of the northern farms. But the kath hounds and the Mandalorian problem has been getting really bad of late, and we're here to ask the Jedi Council to help."

"I've heard that the kath hounds have gotten bad."

"Recently the kath hounds have been acting much more aggressively. They've even attacked some of the settlers! Those Mandalorian raiders have been milking the outlying farms dry, too... I hear Jon got hit really bad. Too bad about his daughter. "

Canderous suddenly interjected. "He should have been protecting her better if he wanted to keep her."

Gar glared at Canderous. "Mandalorian beast! Some of us don't like fighting and killing and butchering as much as you!" He then sighed, "I'm not sure exactly what the Council will do about it, but we need some help with this. I only hope they'll listen to me."

Gar's anger radiated off of him, and I could feel it seep into the Force. I stepped between him and Canderous. "Please, this isn't time to open wounds."

Canderous snorted. "Damn it, Phoenix the Jedi have ruined you."

I glared at him and said firmly. "And there is no sense in getting into an argument or fight over this when our target is the same. You want to get rid of the raiders, don't you Canderous?"

Canderous nodded

I gave Canderous a hard glare, "Good." I turned to Gar, "I am not with the council and I am just a lowly apprentice, but I will help you. I'll get rid of the raiders for you."

Gar nodded. "Thank you Jedi….Thank you."

"And what is this about Jon and his daughter?"

Gar sighed. "His daughter was killed by Mandalorians when their farm was raided. He's been taking it pretty hard. If you want to ask him about it, he's just north of here. It's not my place to say anything else."

"I see….anything else about them?"

"Ever since the Republic beat them years ago, little groups have been roaming all over the place.

Canderous snorted. "They're pathetic. They're taking scraps when they should be taking worlds."

I looked firmly at Canderous. "What do you expect, Canderous? They have no leader, so your clans have no one to organize them to 'take worlds'. Your people have no authority among your clans to tell them to do this or not to do it. Your people are broken and scattered."

Canderous nodded but was quiet. I could feel him in the Force and he was brooding and I knew that I had shut him up.

Although suddenly I felt like maybe I had been too hard on him, because I had cut him to his very being and I knew to apologize to Canderous would have been weakness on both our parts. So it was best to continue on my trial and not to say anything else.

"I must be going; I have to finish my trial."

Gar nodded."Farewell, then. May the Force be with you, is that how it goes? Yes, may the Force be with you."

We proceeded out of the Enclave courtyard when I felt anger and rage. A man came forward toward me, "Are you a Jedi? How long can you people continue to sit by and claim you protect us? Protectors? Ha! You sit in your Enclave safe from the Mandalorians while we suffer!"

I straighten up and tried to look as calm and Jedi-like as possible, "We are Jedi. What we decide is always right."

Carth started laughing. "Is that an impersonation of Bastila? If it is, it's a good one."

I smirked. "Yea, maybe….."

The man looked at me angrily. "Those Mandalorian brutes have killed my daughter!"

I recognized that this must have been Jon, the man that everyone had been talking about, "I am sorry….Jon"

Canderous stated firmly. "You should have protected her better. And you call yourself her father."

I said coldly. "Canderous….."

"And what am I supposed to do against a dozen Mandalorians and Duros? Nothing... There was nothing I could do...They came to our land, demanding our livelihood. But Ilsa, my Ilsa, said no..."

I shook my head. "Only an idiot says no when they have a gun in their face."

The man started sobbing."She was always impulsive….There was nothing I could do... Too many of the Mandalorians and their Duros allies... I've come here to ask you, please, master Jedi, stop these raiders and get revenge for my daughter. "

"I am a Jedi, I don't do revenge. I understand though, really I do."

My heart ached for this man. My memories of my dead family, killed during the war. Part of me felt that maybe there was a small part of me that did want revenge though. What if these Mandalorians were the same ones that had killed my family? Was I a liar to say this wasn't for revenge? I couldn't honestly answer that, to be truthful. However, when I searched within myself, where there should have been anger, I felt nothing. I felt hollow and numb inside. I could barely remember the faces of my parents or my brother. It scared me that memories were fading within me. The hollow and numb emptiness scared me more than possibly the feeling of anger.

"Please, I beg of you! Find the Mandalorian raiders and destroy them so my daughter can rest in peace!"

"I will do it though…. to protect you and your fellow settlers."

"I will give you all I have, just please, annihilate them from the face of this planet! "

"What can you tell me about these raiders?"

"Not much that would help you, I'm afraid. They're Mandalorians in their battle armor with some Duros allies. They came down on us on landspeeders, so they could be anywhere now. One thing I do remember when those dogs killed my Ilsa, is that their leader was a giant of a man... who wielded a lightsaber."

My eyes went wide. "A lightsaber? What was he a Jedi?"

Jon shook his head. "Mandalorians have never been open to the ways of the Jedi. They are much too barbaric and violent. I rather think that it may have been from some poor Jedi he had slain before. You can see now that he is as much of a threat to you as to me! You must kill them! They have been troubling farms in the south most recently, having already dealt with many to the north. Please go there, find them and kill them! "

I nodded so aside from cleansing the glove from the dark side and now I had to deal with Mandalorian raiders plus one with a lightsaber. Wonderful!

Finally exiting the Enclave a woman ran up to me. Now what?

"Please….young Jedi, I wonder if you could assist me. I seem to have lost my... companion, you see."

"Ummm who are you?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, master Jedi, I did not give you a proper introduction. I am Elise Montagne. I own the farm to the north of here. But I really am in need of your assistance. Time may be critical with so many kath hounds about. Oh, and those Mandalorians! Please, will you help me find him?"

"Companion?"

"We were working on my farm to the north of here. I was working in the garden outside, and he was working inside. I heard the door to the house open, but not close. I went to see and found it wide open! I searched everywhere, and could not find him! I worry so much. I need him back so badly. I wonder if he... Could he have been kidnapped?"

I looked thoughtful. "Well….does anyone hold a grudge against him?"

"Maybe it was the Mandalorians... or maybe kath hounds. But... no...kath hounds are not intelligent enough to open doors. Although they have been more vicious lately... No it must have been someone who could open the door by himself. Come to think of it, the door was locked!"

"Could someone have bypassed the lock?"

"No, the door was undamaged and showed no signs of tampering..."

"Could it have been opened from the inside?"

"Well... Yes, it could have. But he had no reason to run away! His programming..."

My jaw dropped. "You have got to be kidding me?! You want me to run around to find some stupid droid?"

"Well... yes... he is a droid. But he is very valuable to me all the same! He is the last piece of my poor, passed-away husband that I have left. He is very dear to me, my precious is. I don't know what I'd do without him! He's the only companionship I have on all of Dantooine!"

I didn't want to think about what the frack this woman was using that droid for. Some people do have some really weird fetishes. "Ummm what exactly did you use him for again?"

"He is a personal assistance droid. My husband was a genius at constructing droids. He made this one capable of taking care of me for the rest of my life. As the last legacy of my husband, for my own personal ease of mind, I need him back! His absence gnaws at me like a gaping wound. Please, I beg of you, return my droid to me!"

Carth's eyes went wide as he looked at me and then at the woman and then back at me. "Wow. She really misses her droid, doesn't she?"

I shrugged at Carth, somehow this felt really kinky to me, but who was I to judge, I sighed. "Alright…. I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you! Thank you, master Jedi! If you find him, please send him home to me. I need him so much!"

So now, I was up to three tasks. As we went off into the fields of Dantooine, I had a bit of an epiphany. "You know what, Republic I think I am starting to miss being a smuggler. This being a Jedi is a lot of work."

Carth laughed. "Yea and you said you didn't want to be boxed in."

"I did, didn't I? What the frack did I get myself into, Republic?"

Carth laughed and Zaalbar suddenly started laughing as well. I snorted. "Laugh it up fuzzball…."

Even Canderous had a bit of a grin on his face.

I sighed. "Okay…..so…..let me see….let's prioritize what needs to be done first. I really need to complete my trial. So I need to focus on that first. Then lets find the Mandalorians, and finally let's find that kinky woman's droid. Assuming nothing else happens before…..."

Zaalbar moaned. "Kath hounds….."

He aimed his bowcaster at them and began to fire. Carth and Canderous took out their blasters and began to fire. I sighed preparing myself internally for combat and ignited my lightsaber. I lifted my hand and called upon the Force and focused on strengthening my own defense and then attempted to stun the kath Hounds. It worked, at least on one of the hounds. So while the hound was incapacitated I worked on the others. I focused on one of the others and pushed with the Force and pushed it away from me so I'd have a bit more room to fight them. I then slashed and fought away with my lightsaber blade.

Zaalbar moaned in pain as the kath hounds bit and scratched at him. I called on what little remained of my Force energy and called upon the Force to energize and heal Zaalbar. The Force shimmered around him and his wounds healed.

Zaalbar brought down his kath hound and between me, Carth and Canderous we brought down the remaining kath hounds.

Carth looked at me incredulously. "That…..was….I don't think I am going to ever be able to get use to you doing that."

"You're not unhappy about it, are you Carth?"

He shook his head. "No…..I just….well….I kind of forgot you could….well…..I have never seen you use the Force in that way before."

"I know, it feels kind of strange using it in front of you and the others too. I suppose I'll get use to it. Anyway….let's keep going."

Zaalbar nodded and moaned. "Thank you for healing me, Phoenix Star. I have never experienced healing like that before."

"You're welcome, Zaalbar.

We walked around, this whole area felt oddly familiar as we walked around. Course I did come from a farm world, maybe it was just because I felt comfortable walking around where things grew.

We dealt with some more kath hounds. The area around the dead kath hounds was barren and dead. The ground was white. I picked up some of the ground and sniffed it and tasted it and spat it out. Salt and ashes. This whole area had been salted and burned. I raised an eyebrow. A dank chill filled this barren area. The Force felt cold, something happened here that was wrong. I felt death and despair and it caused a shiver to go through me. My poor mother would have said that it was like someone had walked over my grave.

Carth took off his jacket and wrapped it around me. "Are you okay, Phoenix?"

"So cold….." My teeth chattered. As we walked, the stone ruins came into view. These were the ruins that Bastila and I had seen in my dream. I felt like I was going to be overwhelmed, the dark cold chill seeped into my bones. I willed myself to go further and I managed to touch the entryway. My fingers prickled, and I felt an electric shock go through me and my black hair stood on end. I wanted to open it, but I felt drained.

Carth gasped."Phoenix, you look pale as ice…."

I nodded and chattered. "D-d-dark side…..sooooo cold."

I sunk to my knees, and Carth suddenly bent down and picked me up. "That's it….we're going back to the Hawk. You need a cup of caff."

I shook my head. "No…..I have to complete my trial…..just get me away from here….please….."

"Damn you Phoenix, you're going to kill yourself by refusing yourself rest and denying yourself a reprieve."

I shook my head. "My choice….we stay put….just not here."

He held onto me in his arms and as soon as we were some meters away. I was able to breath and my complexion seemed to return to its normal state. I breathed and attempted to try a Jedi calming technique to restore myself to calm. "That was unsettling….the council was right…..I wasn't ready to face that."

Carth looked at me and sighed. "What does the Dark side feel like, Phoenix?"

"Cold, empty, numb, darkness, despair, and death. I guess some people would feel invigorated by all of that but I felt like I was going to die."


	33. 32 Dantooine: Juhani and Raiders part 2

**Chapter 32: Dantooine: Juhani and Mandalorian Raiders Part 2**

 **~Phoenix~**

I looked at Canderous, my blood still felt cold within me from the attempt at opening the ruins. I sighed, "Canderous….do you have any stories?" I paused, "War stories maybe, something to warm my blood...oh and a nip from your flask would be nice too."

I still felt a bit weak and we were sitting around a fire, a fire that Zaalbar had taken the time to make. He had also brought down an iriaz and was roasting it. The smell of the meat made my mouth water. After weeks of no animal proteins at all in the Enclave, the smell of freshly killed, dressed and prepared meat was enough to drive me crazy. Nope, I could never be a vegetarian. Zaalbar chuckled lightly as he saw me stare at his kill and the longing look in my eyes at the meat. He stated calmly,"How sentients cannot eat meat is puzzlement to me as well, Phoenix Star."

I sighed. "Some moral high ground about how hurting and killing life even for food is not the Jedi way. I get it, really I do. Yet, I am quite partial about a nice juicy cut of meat and something a bit stronger than water."

Carth smiled at me. "Here all this time I was worried that…."

I chuckled, "What that a few weeks of training would make me into Bastila. Bastila means well, but she's too...restrained, too controlled. A person like that…." I paused, "no, I promised I wouldn't talk about Bastila like this back on Taris, and I won't do it again."

Yet, what I had meant to say was that a restrained person like Bastila showed a person with a deep and tired mental internal struggle. She was straining, I could feel it through our bond. I couldn't be that way, I would break and shatter. For me it was better to be true to myself and true to who I was.

"So you worried needlessly Carth. I maybe a Jedi but I am still fundamentally the same person I was before training. Well maybe….that's not entirely true, but….overall I am pretty much the same person I've always been."

Canderous slipped the flask from his pocket and handed it to me. It had been weeks since I had sipped any intoxicating drink and the heat from the Mandalorian brew tasted good to me plus took away the chill I felt. He smiled. "You want to hear tales of my exploits? Of the wars I've seen and fought, the enemies I've seen die by my hand? Heh, sure, I'll humor you. My name's Canderous of the Mandalorian clan Ordo. I've been fighting across the galaxy for 40 of your years. For my people it's the honor and glory of battle that rules us. It's through combat that we prove our worth, gain renown and make our fortunes."

"Is that why the Mandalorians attacked the Republic?"

"The Sith came to us with an offer: to fight a worthy enemy in a battle that would be remembered forever. Win or lose, as long as the fight is worthy, then honor is gained. The glory at having triumphed over impossible odds is what drives us. If there's nothing at stake – your possessions, your life, your world – then the battle's meaningless. We Mandalore take everything we are and throw it into battle. It's the true test of yourself – the battle against death… against oblivion."

I nodded. "I am familiar with that philosophy, Canderous. I came across it during my travels in my smuggling days. I dealt with many Mandalorians that saw me as a pest." I chuckled lightly. "I did what I had to do and that was to arm as many people as I could against your slaughter."

Carth snorted. "Slaughter is right. You slaughtered innocents…."

Canderous looked incredulously at Carth. "Carth, you fought in the Mandalorian Wars, didn't you? You're just as guilty of slaughtering people as well. But, we may have faced each other in combat. What battles were you in?"

"I try not to think about my past battles too much. The horrors of war are something I'd rather not relive."

Canderous' eyes went wide. "The horrors of war? My people know only the glory of battle. I'm disappointed in you, Carth. I thought a warrior like you would understand."

I held up my hand in a peaceful non threatening manner. "Keep it cool, you two. I don't want this getting out of hand."

Carth stated firmly. "I'm not a warrior, I'm a soldier. There's a difference. Warriors attack and conquer, they prey on the weak. Soldiers defend and protect the innocent – mostly from warriors."

I could have said otherwise, but Carth was naive. Soldiers follow orders. If soldiers were ordered to slaughter the innocent and weak then Carth's justification and point was just as wrong and flawed. Yet, I didn't want to bust Carth's bubble. Let him think that somehow being a soldier was a more noble profession.

Canderous' thought process seemed to follow slightly in tangent with my own as he spoke, "Nice speech. I bet you tell yourself that every night so you can sleep. But I accept who and what I am. I don't have to justify it with words – victory in battle is my justification!"

Carth looked incredulous. "Justification through victory? So what happens when you lose? You know, like you did against us."

Canderous remained firm. "You had us outnumbered five to one. You had more ships, more troops, more supplies and the Jedi on your side. And we still made the Republic tremble before we fell!"

Carth snorted. "Nice speech. I bet you tell yourself that every night so you can sleep. I don't want to talk about this anymore, Canderous. The war is over. You lost." He turned to me, "Why do you want to hear this man's stories of war and slaughter, Phoenix? I thought….I thought you were better than this?"

I sighed. "To learn, Carth. Every side has their own history, their own points of view. It is through these points of view that we learn to understand each other better. Perhaps that brings peace, perhaps it doesn't. Perhaps it brings conflict. Yet, the overall goal is to understand, whether that be an enemy or a friend, the purpose is the same. So tell me your history, Canderous, I wish to hear it. You said something about facing death and oblivion….did you seek death?"

Carth went quiet, he seemed to be mulling over my words and said nothing more.

"All life dies eventually. A true warrior is one who can beat it down whenever it raises its head. But… times have changed now. The Mandalore clans have been scattered across the Outer Rim, the Republic is in decline and the Sith Empire rises to take its place. The clans as they were aren't a threat, but the galaxy still fears us. Ha! People think we war out of spite, or bloodlust. They don't understand, and fear that. We only wanted the challenge of the battle, and glory from it – win or lose. And we lost. But now I have no real challenges. Crushing Davik's enemies and the pathetic gangs in the Lower City of Taris could not be considered the most glorious of tasks. When I think of the battles I've fought… the thousands I've killed… the worlds I've burned… I weep for my past. We'll never speak of this again, Phoenix."

I nodded. "I understand, my friend."

Zaalbar moaned. "The iriaz is done." He quietly took a knife and cut some of the meat from it and handed it to me. It was boiling hot and I used the Force to keep it from burning my hands. I breathed on it and cooled it down a bit and took a bite of it and grinned as fatty animal grease went down my lips and down my chin, "It's good Zaalbar. I've missed the taste of freshly butchered meat."

Zaalbar nodded as he proceeded to cut up the meat and handed it to others to enjoy. The wookiee finally settled down and proceeded to eat the rest of the iriaz.

 **~ o0o~**

We continued our journey across the plains of Dantooine, taking down more kath hounds. Yet, my ears heard the sound of speeder engines. I heard the echo of voices across the plains.

"You've been holding out on us again. Since you haven't given us enough money, I guess we're going to have to take it out of you piece by piece!"

I smiled at Canderous and he pulled out his blaster rifle, I held my lightsaber at the ready, Carth had his blasters drawn, and Zaalbar had his bowcaster ready.

I heard the plaintive whine of the man. "No! Please! Take my wife and children instead!"

It was too late, as the Mandalorian we now saw gunned down the man and then laughed, "Mmm… Wife and children. Sounds like a good idea… "

I quickly ignited my lightsaber and went charging after the Mandalorian raider. Meanwhile, Carth and the others went after the Duros that were allied with the Mandalorian.

The raider glared at me. "Pathetic Jedi, soon you'll meet up with Sherruk. He will teach you to fear him."

I chuckled lightly. "I highly doubt that, Mandalorian. I've faced your kind before." I thought back on my fight with Bendak Starkiller as well as my confrontations with them in the past.

"Bragging?" The Mandalorian stated during blow of lightsaber and melee weapon. "What kind of Jedi are you?"

That was a good question, what kind of Jedi was I? I was bragging about my past combats with Mandalorians. Such bragging wasn't Jedi-like at all. Yet, he didn't hear my answer as my lightsaber finally managed to slice through his thick armor and sliced through to his flesh and went to his heart. He crumbled before me dead.

I looked around to see that Carth, Canderous, and Zaalbar had taken out the Duros. I sighed. "That's one Mandalorian raider. There are probably more."

Canderous nodded. "Mandalorians usually travel in squads of three. You killed one group, there will be two more groups. Then there is the leader and his squad. They keep in touch with the minor squads, if the two groups go dark, the leader will respond.

I nodded, so there were four groups of Mandalorians. The question was where were these other groups? We proceeded forward. We proceeded to go over a bridge, the trickling of water was peaceful and I stopped for a moment for a group and told the others. "I wish….to meditate for a bit."

Carth and Zaalbar nodded. Canderous groaned a bit but said nothing. I needed time to contemplate my failure at the ruins. If I was so easily pushed back by the Dark Side, how was I going to be able to cleanse the Dark Side from the grove? So I sat by the bridge and quietly meditated. The water trickling down the bridge, I pictured the water as the flow of the Force, flowing cleanly and pristine throughout life itself. I sighed, as I closed my eyes and sought to bring balance back to me. As I meditated I felt a second presence within me. I smiled softly, Bastila. She was meditating as well. I lightly brushed her mind and she brushed mine. She reached out and we both connected. It seemed that our meditation was in the same direction, looking for harmony, unity and balance.

Bastila was troubled and I was troubled. I whispered through the Force to her, _We need to help each other sister Jedi….we are both troubled. Let our bond unite us and bring us together._

I heard Bastila's voice respond within my mind, _Sister Jedi I accept your guidance, let the Force unite us and bring us unity._

So our minds meditated together. I felt a cleansing within me, clearing doubt, clearing the muck and darkness that both us were plagued with, our balance restored and the river within our souls as the water was cleared, whatever blockage that was blocking us from going forward was cleared. I sighed and opened my eyes. Meanwhile I could sense that Bastila was doing the same. I sighed and whispered through the Force to Bastila, _Thank you sister Jedi….I am restored to harmony._

Bastila did not respond but I got a sense of overall peace and calm from her so I knew both our efforts were successful. Perhaps this bond thing wasn't too bad after all. Bastila needed me as much as I needed her. We were connected and it was hard not to find something more to the bond. I thought back to her feelings for me. She wanted more from me than just a sisterly connection.

I heard the laughter of the dark voice and I groaned inwardly, not my inner dark voice again. _You always had a habit of getting into messy relationships. Falling for Bastila and Carth is a big mess, Phoenix. You know this. You either choose one or the other, you cannot have both. If you choose one, you will sacrifice the other. Choose Bastila and you will lose Carth, Choose Carth and you will lose Bastila. If you choose both you will lose both of them. You can only have a relationship with one of them, You must choose Phoenix, and choose wisely._

I sighed, this dark voice was a fracking pain, and I questioned once again, who the frack are you?

The voice laughed and said the same thing as it had said last time; _I_ _ _am a voice that will not be denied….__

Just answer the damn question.

There was a pause, and then an answer, _I do not know, and I am not fully sure. I might know, and I might not, I am confused, just as you are. I just know I am a part of you, a part that knows you, and yet….I do not. Ask Bastila, tell her that you demand an answer as she is our Ashla'kai._

Yea, that helps me a whole lot. Why don't you ask her?

 _She won't answer or acknowledge me. She finds me repulsive. You are the one that must ask her._

I sighed. I didn't even know what to ask or demand from Bastila. Yea, ask Bastila that a dark voice was asking me to demand an answer. Yea, hearing voices is a sign of mental instability, something that people called a disorder or something. My cousin, Karras Naberrie on Naboo, heard voices and he was put in some fracking facility and he drooled into a cup shortly thereafter, and that occurred when they wired his brain up to some sort of device and pumped him full of electricity. No thanks. All this would do was guaranteed a lock up in a mental facility if I told Bastila I was hearing a voice in my head. Plus what in the Force was an Ashla'kai?

The dark voice sighed. _Fine then we must both remain ignorant and in fear._

I finally laughed internally at the dark voice on my own, it's not fear, you fracking idiot, who-ever-you-are. It's called survival. If you want to be locked up in a mental facility with me, then get the frack out of my head.

The voice sighed in resignation. _your_ _ _point is valid, Phoenix. I will trouble you no more….for now.__

I got up from the bridge; I looked at my friends who waited patiently for me. "I am ready to continue."

We continued our journey I decided that this fracking voice in my head was enough of a bother. I sighed and Carth said softly. "Is something bothering you, Phoenix?"

I sighed."Yea..." No, don't tell him, that you think you're losing your mind. He'll only get more paranoid. I needed to read up on voices and the Dark Side. There had to be an answer for this dark voice rumbling around in my head.

I had to think of a convenient lie or something to distract Carth's attention, I sighed and said to him. "Carth I want to thank you for being there for me at the ruins earlier. It was stupid of me to think I could accomplish something on my own that the Council said earlier I wasn't ready for."

He smiled softly, "No problem, Phoenix. No offense but you are kind of stubborn, hard headed….."

I coughed, "Okay, okay….I get the point."

He chuckled lightly. "But I love you regardless."

I smiled softly and planted a kiss on his nose, "You have a cute nose by the way."

He chuckled lightly and he took my hand and squeezed it in a loving manner.

If I had to choose someone to love and be in a relationship, it had to be Carth. Although my feelings for Bastila were confused, I loved her and I wasn't quite sure if it was a feeling of sisterhood or something else, and maybe that was that damn bond. I wasn't sure. That damn dark voice was right about me and messy relationships. I had to choose. Damn it all, why did I have to be pulled in different directions?!

Continuing our journey, I saw a Jedi coming up to me. "Apprentice, your arrival here is well timed."

Uh oh! I didn't like the sound of that, it sounded like I was going to be given yet another task. I sighed. "Who are you?"

"I am Bolook, a Jedi from the Enclave. I was sent by the Jedi Council to investigate a killing that took place here a few hours ago. Communication does not pose a problem, as both the suspects and I speak Basic and Huttese. I was going to handle this case myself, but now that you are here this could be an excellent opportunity for you to demonstrate how well you have been learning your lessons at the academy. Though you are not yet a full Jedi, perhaps you could assist me in sorting out the truth from the lies."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Listen to the stories given by the two suspects. I have brought an information retrieval droid with access to the archives both at the Jedi Enclave and the planetary capital. I will use my wisdom and experience to offer you some guidance, but I will not solve the case for you. There is little benefit if you do not solve this problem yourself. Consider each man's account and check the facts with the information droid. Once you have gathered all the evidence you think you need, run through the possible scenario with me. If you are unable to come to a satisfactory resolution, then I will take these men to the Enclave and deal with this myself."

I looked at Carth and he sighed. "From what I know of the Jedi, your lot are suppose to do these sorts of things all the time. I don't envy you one bit on this, Phoenix. Trying to ferret out truth from lies and…."

I stated firmly. "This is more of Bastila's thing. She is a Jedi Sentinel. They are to ferret out deceit and injustice. As for me….I am a Jedi Consular, I am suppose to guide towards overall balance in the Force."

Carth chuckled. "Well Jedi Consular….you get to be a Jedi Sentinel today."

"Funny….Republic, if it wasn't for the fact I've never been a judge before. I haven't even guided my studies towards this sort of thing. I've been trying to strengthen my knowledge of the Force itself."

Carth sighed. "Well you managed to discern that Brejik was allied with Revan, surely you can figure out who is telling the truth and who is lying."

"That's true….and I wasn't even a Jedi then. Wish me luck, figuring this out, Republic."

I went over to the twi'lek Jedi and sighed, "Sooooo….what's the story here?"

"According to the accounts of the participants, these three men were out here in the field together earlier, before the clouds broke. I find that very odd, for most people would seek shelter indoors when the sky is filled with dark storm clouds as it was earlier today. But that is not the most puzzling aspect of the case. The dead man, Calder Nettic, was shot in the back with a blaster rifle. A rifle was found lying near his body with blood stains on it. It has been sent back to the Enclave for analysis. Two other men were found at the scene when I arrived. One was Handon Guld. He was unarmed. The other was Rickard Lusoff, who was carrying a hunting laser. Both men say they did not do anything, and that they came across the body. But both also accuse the other. Obviously there is more to this than what we have been told."

I nodded. "I guess I should get started figuring this out."

Bolook held up his hand urging me to wait for a moment. "There is one last thing. When I arrived Handon was holding his side and Rickard was favoring one of his legs. You would do well to remember this as we progress through the case. If there is anything else you need, I will remain here while you question the witnesses."

I sighed and went over to the dead body and looked it over. Calder Nettic, his body was shot from behind. I then looked up and went over to one of the men, he had a beard and he seemed to be limping just a bit, I frowned, Bolook said his name was Rickard Lusoff and as I approached he spoke with disdane dripping from his lips, "Another Jedi, eh? Helping that twi'lek investigate, no doubt. He seems stumped."

Hmm, a little Force stun seemed in order, I mused. This guy seemed a bit unwilling to communicate. Too bad Bolook wasn't here. A little Force in the right place would get this guy talking, I was sure of it.

The man then said. "I am Richard Lusoff. Maybe you can figure this out and let me get out of here."

Canderous was behind me and said to me. "You know Phoenix, this would be a lot easier if you just shot them both for being here with a dead body. It would save you time in the long run."

I chuckled lightly. "Yea probably, but that's not the Jedi way, nor is it my way, Canderous."

I turned back to the Rickard. "Tell me what happened?"

"Well I was out hunting iriaz, when I spotted one over by the bridge. I pulled out my rifle and aim at it. I couldn't see it that well, mind you, cause the damn sun was in my eyes. So I shoot at it and it drops. I walk over here and find Handon standing over Calder's body! So why don't you get this whole farce over with and send that whiner Handon to the prison he belongs in!

I frowned a bit and ran my fingers through my black hair. What sun? Bolook had said it was cloudy. Hmm. A lie. And lies in matters like this, didn't bode well.

I nodded at Rickard. "I see…..well I must question you both. I may be questioning you later."

He grumbled a bit as I then went over to Handon. He seemed a bit more polite than Rickard but his overall stance indicated a man that was nervous. I raised an eyebrow, yet I supposed that if one was being accused of murder, I would be nervous as well.

"Ahh greetings. You must be assisting Master Bolook in his investigation. I am Handon Guld, perhaps you've heard of me?"

I frowned; this man must have had a high opinion of himself thinking I knew or had heard of him.

"Should I have?"

"Um….I guess, under the circumstances, no. Well I presume you wish to hear my story then? I shall tell you, of course, but there is not much to it. I am sure that you'll agree that Rickard is quite obviously guilty of murder."

I rolled my eyes; yea sure blame the other guy, how typical. How disgusting. Yea, Canderous may have been right; shooting them both would be easier.

"You see, I was out here running earlier today – yes I was running. I do that a lot. I can't stand speeders, never use them. Keeps me in shape too you know! Anyway, I was out running on the other side of that bridge there when I heard a shot coming from over here. I ran over and found this man Calder lying on the ground dead!"

Running? Yea, sure. The fields were filled with enraged kath hounds and you're out and running? Something seemed odd about this. Yet, even still running didn't prove this man had killed anyone. It only proved that this man was stupid running around fields with kath hounds running about, course if he was running about, where was his blaster? Only an idiot would go out running around unarmed with kath hounds around.

"So did you see the killer?"

Handon stated. "I saw Rickard come sulking out of the shadows of the rocks south of the river, and I knew something was wrong. I hit my emergency button and called the Enclave right away. Well….there, that's my story. Now please hurry this up and arrest Rickard so I can get on with my day!"

"I am afraid I can't do that, sir. I must weigh everything carefully. I wouldn't want an innocent person to be punished and I wouldn't want a guilty person to go free either. So let me do my job as a Jedi."

Handon sighed and I decided to talk to the droid that Master Bolook had brought with him. I came up to the droid who apparently knew I was an apprentice when I came up to him. "Greetings apprentice. You must be the one Master Bolook has enlisted to help with the problem. I am an information retrieval droid. I can assist you by accessing the records of both the Jedi Enclave and the central government facilities here on Dantooine. If you have any need of my services please do not hesitate to talk to me. I have already retrieved some information from the archives on Calder Nettic, Rickard Lusoff, and Handon Guld. I have also had time to examine the body of Mr. Nettic. Is there any information you require?"

I sighed I had already examined the body myself but the droid might know more. "What did you find out about the body?"

The droid recited. "My preliminary analysis of the body indicates that he was killed approximately 3 hours ago by a single energy blast to the torso. Is there any other information you need?"

I cringed a bit, that sounded painful and agonizing. I wondered if Nettic died in pain or if his life was immediately snuffed out, because being shot in the torso like that did not sound pleasant at all and to be laying on the ground dying. Of course if it was me, I'd strike out at my murderer, I'd make sure I did not go quietly into the night.

Turning back to the droid, it brought me back to the fact that Mr. Handon had been running around unarmed in the fields, that didn't make sense. "Yea, tell me about these fields."

The droid responded. "These plains are rifle with wild animals, not all of them benign. The iriaz are mostly docile, but can be easily provoked to violence. Kath hounds, on the other hand, are much more deadly. There have been over 35 cataloged attacks on settlers by kath hounds in the last two weeks. A general advisory was given out three days ago to carry a weapon at all times when on the plains. Small farms and holdings dot the plains, and can provide refuge for those in need. Is there any other information you need?"

I sighed, that answered a lot and left me a lot more questions particularly about Handon's lack of weapon. "I will have more questions later."

The droid stated. "Very well. I will be here to assist you."

I nodded and decided to talk to Bolook about my findings. He stated. "So apprentice, is there something I can do to help you in the investigation?"

I nodded. "Yes, I wish to discuss the murder."

"Very well. We should start at the beginning. If we find the truth behind each piece of the puzzle, we will no doubt resolve the case. Handon said that he was nearby and ran over, only to find Calder already dead. He said Rickard came out of the shadow of the rocks holding a blaster in his hands. Rickard said that he was hunting iriaz, saw one through the glare of the sun and shot at it. It is possible that Rickard may have shot Calder accidentally and Handon may have found the body, but that seems a very unlikely explanation. It is more likely that at least one of them is lying. Obviously one of these men is not telling us something, but where does the truth lie?"

I smiled softly. "Rickard is lying."

The twi'lek frowned. "Oh, and why do you believe that?"

"It was cloudy; there was no sun glare!"

Bolook nodded. "Yes, well done! It was cloudy this morning. If it had happened as Rickard had said, the sun would not have been visible at the time of the killing. You seem to have caught Rickard in a bit of a lie. It seems I was correct in assuming you could help me with this case. This lie doesn't prove Rickard is guilty, but I think you have taken the first step in unraveling this mystery. We should proceed on to the next point. We need to find a motive for the killing. Maybe you should talk to the men about their relationship with the victim. If there is anything else you need, I will remain here while you question the witnesses."

I nodded and went back over to Rickard and he said a bit more calmly than before. "So what do you want to know?"

"Did you know the victim?"

"Yea, I knew him. Hell, we've known each other for a good long time. Doesn't mean I really have to have liked the slime-ball."

Ahh bruised feelings, that was indeed interesting. Slime-ball….. hmmm!

Rickard sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on him…..especially now that he's dead. We actually got along pretty well most of the time. We just had our…..differences. We were involved in some orbit-to-ground transport operations for Aratech. Can I leave now? I should probably be the one to give the news to his wife."

I raised an eyebrow, from slime-ball to business partner? Hmm there was more to this than what he was saying. The question was why?

I shook my head. "I have more I need to ask you. Why were you out here?"

Rickard got angry. "I already told you, didn't I? I was hunting iriaz. Haven't seen many in the area recently, what with those kath hounds acting up, but they're still around. I was in my blind a little south from here when I spotted one, like I said before. I shot and POW!, it went down. But when I came over here, there's Handon standing over the body and the Iraiz was gone! Now I didn't have nothing to do with this, so can I go now?"

"No, I have another question."

Rickard cursed. "Damn it Jedi. How long is this going to take?"

I smirked. "I am asking the questions here, but if you wish to go back to a cell and be questioned I am sure I can arrange that with Bolook."

Rickard sighed. "Fine….what else do you want to ask me?"

"Why would someone wish to kill him?"

Rickard shook his head. "You Jedi are so predictable. Always seeing some greater purpose behind everything, when the simple answer is usually the right one."

"There has to be a motive, Mr. Lusoff so in this case there is a reason and a purpose for Caulder being killed."

Rickard shook his head. "Can't you see that it must have been Handon? I saw him standing over the damn body! I don't know why this is causing you so much trouble. You seem almost as lost as this Bolook guy."

I chuckled lightly. "And he says you killed Mr. Nettic. So no….I do not see it except that you rather accuse each other and that you are both claiming innocence, but one more thing I wish to ask you."

Rickard fumed. "Now what?"

"Bolook said you were limping, Are you hurt?"

"Well...uh...I kind of sprained my ankle running through the bush before I found the body. But it's nothing that serious."

I nodded. "Okay…. I have nothing more to ask you at the moment."

"Right…."

I looked thoughtful for a moment and Carth said. "Phoenix…..you seem lost."

I nodded. "Not lost, just trying to figure this out. It's a lot of stuff. I'll figure it out, Republic I still need to ask the droid and Handon about things."

Carth nodded. "I know you'll figure it out. Your mind is sharp enough."

I snorted. "So glad you think so highly of my mind because at times I have my doubts about it."

I did have doubts about my mind, that voice that haunted my mind, which seemed to be getting stronger since I trained in the Force. It had to have something to do with the Force. Did the Force have a voice? Did the Force speak? Did it awaken every so often and whisper in ones ear? Did the Force even quantify as a living being? But wait a minute, that voice said it was a part of me, but the Force was a part of me too. I sighed, enough thinking about me and disembodied voices of the Force. I needed to think about this murder investigation.

I went over to Handon who asked me. "How can I be of further assistance?"

"Did you know the victim?"

"I knew him a little bit, but I was not any sort of great friend to him or anything. I never really associated with him that much, in truth, I didn't really want to. He had a…. reputation. Very inconsiderate of family, I heard."

I raised an eyebrow, inconsiderate of family? What did that exactly mean?

Handon saw my eyebrow raised and he quickly added. "But merely having heard unkind things about someone wouldn't make me want to kill him!"

I shook my head. "No one says you killed him….yet!"

Handon sighed. "I am sorry, I am getting a bit agitated. Why must we remain here? Can't ….can't you see that Rickard must have shot him?"

I sighed and shook my head. "And Rickard says you killed him. So you see I can't let anyone go. You both are accusing each other, so someone is not being completely honest with me. I also have more questions. I need to ask, I notice you're holding your side. Are you injured?"

Handon suddenly got nervous. "In….injured? No of course not! Why would I have been? Fit as a bantha!" He laughed. "Yes, I run. I don't know if I mentioned that."

I rolled my eyes, this guy was hiding something. "Just stay put….I need to check on some other things."

I went over to the droid who was programmed every time I went to him to say. "Is there any other information that you need?"

I sighed. "What information do you have about Caulder and Handon?"

The droid answered. "The Southwood speeder rental business has records that, over the past several weeks, a speeder had been rented by Mr. Nettic and Mr. Guld."

Hmmm and here Handon said he never used speeders and didn't really know Mr. Nettic. This was getting a bit more interesting.

"Okay droid; tell me more about Rickard and Caulder."

"According to the municipal authorities near the Garang spaceport, there had been news of violent drunken activity in a cantina attached to the port. Apparently a Mr. R. Lusoff was making accusations at a Mr. C. Nettic about cheating him in a business deal. Jedi Tooka was dispatched to the scene and restored order."

Ahh that was why, Rickard called Caulder a slime-ball. Yea, that could be a reason why Rickard wanted to kill Caulder. Yet, there was also the matter of Handon and the speeder there was more to this than one wanted to admit.

"Is there any other information you need?" The droid queried.

I shook my head. "Nope…."

I went quickly over to Handon. "You knew Caulder better than you admit. You rented a speeder with him!"

Handon suddenly turned pale. "But I….I realize this must seem like a motive to you, but I assure you it isn't. I dislike Caulder, true, I would punch his face in, given the opportunity. But I would not kill him!"

I frowned. "Punch his face in? Why?"

Handon sighed. "My wife….she was cheating on me with him. They slept in my own bed while I was in the next room! But….as much as I may have hated him for that, I could not kill him it may have been my own fault for driving my wife away. I must try not to take the law in my own hands. I was just out running, trying to clear my head for the divorce proceedings, not stalking him to kill him. Running is not a crime."

I sighed, no, it wasn't a crime but as Carth would say, it was a bit convenient that he was out here and happened to be here at the time he was murdered. Course; there was also Rickard's business dealings with Caulder. I went over to Rickard. "You thought Caulder was cheating you!"

Rickard said firmly. "I don't love Caulder, but we go back a long way. We run a sub-orbital shipping and transport company out of Garang spaceport. We've been partners in that business for over twenty years, and we've been doing just fine the way we are."

I frowned. "Yes, but you had an argument. You can't deny it; there was bad blood between you!"

Rickard said nothing and I shook my head, seemed like saying nothing was not saying yes or no. I sighed and went back to Bolook. "I need to discuss the murder."

Bolook nodded. "We know Rickard lied about the sun blinding him while he was shooting, but we need more to go on. Let's examine the relationship of each man with the victim. Handon told me he barely knew the victim. On the other hand, Rickard and the victim were business partners. However, according to Rickard they got along quite well. On the surface, neither man seems to have a motive for killing Caulder."

I shook my head. "Bolook, Handon is lying. He knew that his wife was cheating on him with Caulder."

Bolook responded. "Well that is certainly motive for murder. The case is taking shape. However, you mustn't jump to any quick conclusions. Perhaps we should focus on the murder weapon itself. You might want to see what information the witnesses and the information droid provide you about the blaster found near the body."

I sighed and went over to the droid. "Tell me about the weapon found at the scene."

The droid stated. "We cannot get any more specific analysis from that sample other than the fact that it did not belong to Caulder."

The blaster didn't belong to the victim, hmm. So it either had to belong to Handon or Rickard. My bet laid on Handon since apparently he had been unarmed. So I went over to Handon. "What do you know about the weapon found by the body?"

Handon said firmly. "That blaster was stolen from my house last week! I never knew what happened to it. I hardly have enough money to afford a single blaster, let alone another, I can't tell you how important it is to have a weapon on hand with all these ravenous kath hounds around. Even an iriaz can take a man down if it gets in the mood. Every settler has a weapon its our most prized possession. I would most appreciate it if I could have that back after you determine that Rickard is the killer."

So that explained why Handon didn't have a weapon, course it was convenient that the weapon was found near the body. I needed to dig a bit deeper. I went over to Rickard. "What do you know about the weapon found near the body?"

"That blaster? Never seen it before. Caulder himself had a preference for Echani weaponry. He had this one really nice light blaster rifle that he always used. Always wished I could get myself a rifle like the one he had. That blaster ain't it, though. Caulder only had the one rifle, too, so he either must have borrowed that...or it's someone else's."

I nodded. "Okay…" I went over to the droid. I looked thoughtful, if Handon's blaster was stolen, he must have reported it. "Is there a report of Handon's blaster being stolen?"

The droid answered. "I am sorry, but I seem to be failing you. I have searched and searched, but I cannot seem to come up with anything at all. I thought to find the record of the missing weapon report Mr. Guld filed with the authorities, but their does not seem to be one."

"You're not failing me at all, droid. There is no report, because a report wasn't filed. The blaster wasn't stolen and Handon is lying."

I went over to Bolook. "I have more information regarding the blaster found with the body."

"And?"

"The blaster is Handon's. He lied about it being stolen."

"So we caught Handon in a lie. Interesting, but I think we may need one final piece of the puzzle. There was a blood sample on the weapon that had been sent back for analysis just before you arrived. Perhaps you could inquire with the information droid about it."

I went back to the droid. "Tell me about the blood sample on the weapon."

The droid responded. "I have just received back an analysis of the sample found on the weapon. It had been sent back to the Enclave just before you arrived. The blood on the weapon is definitely not Caulder's. Unfortunately there was a bacterial containment in the sample that had been taken back to the laboratory, and it had become degraded. We cannot get any specific analysis from the sample other than the fact it did not belong to Caulder."

Not Caulder's blood. Rickard was limping, and Handon's blaster, and Handon was holding his side. I grinned, I had it. I went over to Handon, "Your side….I need to check your side."

"What!"

He refused to budge and I said in a firm command. "Jedi Bolook come over here…."

He nodded. "Why apprentice?"

"Handon's blood is on the weapon and he's clutching his side."

"Ahh Handon has been moving oddly since I've arrived….perhaps we should examine him a little more closely,"

Bolook moved closer and began to check the man's side. Handon protested. "Hey….what are you doing?"

"There is blood! Handon appears to have suffered some sort of blaster wound to his side. It would seem there is one logical scenario. Handon killed Caulder for having an affair with his wife. Rickard was hunting and accidentally shot Handon after he had killed Caulder."

I grinned. "Nope….they are both guilty…."

Carth looked at me his jaw dropped. "Phoenix, that's pretty gutsy of you accusing them both."

Bolook nodded agreeing with Carth. "A bold conclusion ….one most people would not arrive at. But we are not like most people, we are Jedi. Still, I would like to know how you came to this conclusion.

"No, not really, not gutsy at all or bold either. They both were out here for one reason and that was to kill Caulder. Rickard had business dealings with Caulder. Caulder cheated him or Rickard at least believed he was cheating him. He lied to you, Bolook by saying that his business dealings were fine with him. They both knew Caulder would be out here at this time. They both wanted to kill him. They were out here in the fields and Handon shot Caulder. Rickard came out "hunting" and saw Handon, and thought it was Caulder, he shot at Handon and wounded him. Handon dropped his blaster, the murder weapon. Handon thought Rickard was going to kill him, so he called you out to accuse Rickard and clear his own name. This is what happened. "

Bolook nodded. 'Well done! Both men had a reason to kill Caulder."

The two men glared at me and Bolook. "Damn you….damn both of you..."

Bolook nodded. "That is enough. The culpability of both of you in the murder- and attempted murder – of Caulder Nettic is evident. Additionally, Rickard Lusoff can be charged with aggravated assault and attempted murder of Handon Guld. I place you both under the arrest of the Jedi Order, and will escort you to holding facilities in the Jedi Enclave."

Bolook smiled at me. "You have done well here, it is obvious you have been studying your lessons carefully, I will be sure to inform the Jedi council of your performance in this little test."

Test? This was a test? If only that was the only task I had to perform out here. It also proved to me that even though my sanity might be a bit off, I was able to still use my mind properly. I just wish I didn't have to deal with that damn voice in my mind.

Carth smiled at me. "You did good, Phoenix. You might just make a proper Jedi yet, who knows?"

Bolook said to me. "Good day, and may the Force be with you."

Canderous shook his head. "I still think it would have been easier to have just shot and killed them both, as they both are guilty."

I laughed. "Yea, but that's not the Jedi way. I suppose you would have preferred trial by combat Canderous."

Canderous nodded. "That's a good way to settle disagreements as well."

 **~o0o~**

 _A/N: Okay it really wasn't my intention to put in the murder investigation into the chapter but the more I got into questioning Phoenix's sanity at this point in time. I decided she needed the ability to use her mind to reassure herself that her mind works and that she's not going nuts. Course this makes the chapter longer than I wanted it to be plus a planned meeting with a certain petulant Cathar, would have extended the chapter out even more. Oh well that will be in the next chapter…._


	34. 33 Dantooine: Juhani and Raiders part 3

****Chapter 33: Dantooine: Juhani and Mandalorian Raiders Part 3****

 ** **~Phoenix~****

More kath hounds, I was getting pretty sick of these damn things. Yea, I really needed to find where this grove was. Suddenly I saw, a droid, getting pummeled by those damn hounds. I ignited my lightsaber and went after them. Canderous, Carth, and Zaalbar quickly fired blasters and we finally put an end to them.

I looked at the droid and it spoke, "Thank you for saving me, master Jedi. I am C8-42, a personal assistance droid."

I raised an eyebrow, why was everyone claiming I was a Jedi Master? "I am not a master, I am an apprentice."

"I apologize, apprentice for my incorrect terminology. As I said, I am C8-42, a personal assistance droid. Although in recent months the assistance I render seems to have taken on a disproportionate significance."

"Oh...you're owned by that lady….she's really missing you, you know."

"Yes, I am owned by Elise Montagne, a wealthy widow who lives north of here. Did she send you to find me? Please do not tell her you saw me!"

"Why? She's heartbroken."

"I'm afraid my owner became a bit too attached to me. Obsessed even. She... she tried to treat me as her dead husband. It was not healthy for her."

"Yea, I kind of noticed that. So….treating you like her dead husband you mean…."

"You don't want to know..."

"Yea….I don't think I want to know. So….you ran away?"

"She is obsessed. She rarely sees other people, and appears to be fixated on me as her husband. She was becoming more and more insular... I thought it best that I leave. She may meet other real people this way. In fact, that was the reason I came here and sought out those kath hounds."

I raised an eyebrow, "So let me get this straight, you went against your programming and….wanted to commit suicide. Are you crazy?"

"I think it would be best if I were no longer a factor. She would meet new people. Living people. Please... will you destroy me?"

I sighed; I wasn't exactly sure what to do. I look thoughtful. Return the droid back and the woman would go back to an unhealthy relationship or destroy the droid.

"Fine….you wish to be destroyed I'll do it. I don't like it though. She really misses you. It will crush her heart."

The droid paused in thought and then said, "Perhaps….perhaps you're right. How could I be so selfish? I must not think only of myself, but of how it affects her. She must be frantic. And if she lost me she'd be devastated. I must return then. It is my duty."

The droid went off toward the Enclave.

Canderous laughed, "You know you just doomed that droid to the whims of its master, right?"

Zaalbar nodded, "The woman is madclaw….you should have destroyed the droid and not tried to convince it to return."

I looked at Carth, "What do you think Carth?"

Carth shrugged, "You did what was right by the droid's owner, Phoenix. I can't say it was right for the droid, but… you could have done worse."

"Worse?"

"Yes, you could have destroyed the droid and told her the droid was still lost out here."

I shrugged, "Yea...I really don't think there was a right or wrong on this, Republic. Except….well maybe that one thing you mentioned and I am not _that_ heartless. Anyway….that takes care of the droid."

 **~o0o~**

Where were those damn raiders? I kept looking for them but couldn't seem to find them anywhere.

Set up a trap of some sort, that seemed the logical solution, now what would a Mandalorian be interested in? I turned to Canderous, "Canderous….these are your people. What would draw them out?"

He looked thoughtful for a moment, "Pure combat." He then grinned at me, "You're a Jedi. Issue a challenge, like Revan did against Mandalore."

My jaw dropped, "I am not Revan….I am Phoenix Star, I am not even a knight, I am just an apprentice. The last duel I had with a Mandalorian, nearly killed me. Besides, Revan had the backing of the Republic behind him plus his reputation as a military leader. I am just a nobody, what makes you think a Mandalorian would answer the message of a lowly Jedi apprentice. I wouldn't even know how to contact your people in the first place."

Canderous said calmly, "That last Mandalorian raider you killed had a speeder. I am pretty sure transmitting a message over their speeder will get their attention. As for reputation, you already killed Bendak Starkiller on Taris. A lot of Mandalorians were aware of him and informing them that you killed him should be enough to get some attention."

Carth shook his head, "Why does everything with Mandalorians have to involve honor, duels, and combat?"

Canderous said firmly "Because Carth, we are a proud people and honor dictates that combat should be respected. They'll come to you, Phoenix. They'll come because you dare to challenge them and have proven yourself in battle."

I sighed, "It's a good thing that Bastila isn't here. She'd probably blow a fuse over this. Yet, I promised the settlers I'd get rid of the raiders and if that means fighting them on their own terms, I will do so."

We retraced our steps back to the speeder and the dead raider still lay there near his speeder along with the dead settler. The sight of the bodies convinced me even more that this needed to be done. So I went over to the speeder and transmitted a message.

 _~This is Jedi apprentice, Phoenix Star, the killer of Bend_ _ak_ _Starkiller on Taris. I issue a challenge to any and all Mandalorians here on Dantooine. Face me, face me in honorable combat. If you do not honor my request then I know you are nothing more than cowards, cowards that can't face a lowly Jedi apprentice. ~_

I sighed, "There it's done….now I guess we wait."

Canderous nodded and I sat down and meditated, I figured I might as well, of course I had a feeling that me meditating made me look vulnerable. Let the Mandalorians think I was a vulnerable target.

I felt them coming as I looked up and found five Mandalorians and two or three Duros allies walk across the field to me. I arose from my meditation.

"So this Jedi outsider brags and issues a challenge. Maybe she thinks she's Revan." The Mandalorian laughed, "The rest of the Order, cowards….each and every one of them. They would say this one is arrogant and prideful. Ha!….that she has the audacity to issue challenges like Revan can. Maybe she can die like him as well." The Mandalorian stated and he ignited a lightsaber blade. "You meddler, have caused us far too much trouble for a mere Jedi."

I looked at the Mandalorian with a lightsaber blade. "I am not Revan. I am Phoenix Star. You refused to reveal yourselves to me properly so I am here to challenge you directly. You must be Sherruk. I was warned about you and that I should fear you."

He said firmly, "I will add your head to those of the other Jedi I have killed, and take another lightsaber for my own! Now you will know why the Mandalorians are feared! "

Canderous glared at them. "Now this is what I've been waiting for!"

I nodded. "Take on whoever you want, Canderous but Sherruk is mine."

Sherruk nodded. "Indeed, this Jedi is mine. No one interfere with our combat."

So combat began. I left Carth, Canderous and Zaalbar to the others and I focused on Sherruk. I ignited my green blade. This whole affair was totally not what a Jedi consular should be doing. I knew I should have been a Jedi guardian. Yet, I had made my decision and I knew that I needed to focus my combat with the Force more. I called upon the Force, and pushed firmly against the Mandalorian and knocked him over. I focused another Force attack before he could rise and managed to put him in stasis. I focused blow against his heavy armor and barely managed to crack a dent into it before he finally managed to break out of the Force power. Our lightsaber blades clashed.

"Play with a lightsaber, Sherruk, you're going to get burned." I slashed my blade against his hand and the lighsaber and his hand fell to the ground.

To my remarkable surprise, the Mandalorian didn't scream in pain but I could sense the pain radiating off of him. Damn, he should be screaming like a wounded mynock, but to his own credit he didn't. He grabbed the blade with his other hand and threw a blow which I easily blocked.

I said firmly "You should surrender Sherruk. I will accept your defeat."

He ignored me. So it was death. I had no desire to kill him. This wasn't fair and yet the Mandalorian left me no choice but to block his feeble blows with his one handed combat.

"Kill me, Jedi. Prove that you can defeat me as a warrior, not as a Jedi. I am worthless as a warrior if you allow me to live. If you don't fight I will kill you."

Sherruk left me an opening and I suddenly plunged my blade up to its hilt into his armor, the blade sunk deeper into his chest and into his heart. I quickly pulled out the blade and Sherruk toppled to the ground dead.

Looking around me, Carth, Canderous, and Zaalbar's foes were dead before me as well. I sighed, and collected the now deactivated lightsaber from the ground and clipped it to my own belt.

I felt kind of sick and was quiet as we walked away from the remnants of our fight.

Carth seeming to know my disquiet said calmly. "Phoenix…..are you alright?"

"No, I dislike killing a man who I had already disarmed. There is no honor in that, no victory, not even revenge. It's pathetic….and a weakness."

Canderous snorted. "You killed a man in honorable battle…."

I yelled at Canderous. "Honorable….he was wounded, in pain, and he basically allowed himself to be killed. There is no honor in that, Canderous. Your people's pride….has caused your clans to be scattered. Your people could be better than that. Learn to walk away with your heads held high even after defeat. You serve no one in death."

I used the Force and quickened my pace, refusing to be followed after by my company.

I found myself back at the bridge and I spent some time calmly trying to bring myself back into harmony with the Force and to settle my own disquiet.

Zaalbar was the first to reach me. "Phoenix Star….please don't wander away from us. Carth is worried about you."

I sighed. "I am sorry….it's just that my first combat as a Jedi where I had completely had a person practically disarmed and at my mercy." I shook my head, "And they refused to surrender and...I hate myself for killing them."

Zaalbar nodded. "You are no madclaw, Phoenix Star. You asked for your opponent to surrender. He refused. You had no other choice but to complete the cycle of combat. You gave him what he wished, death in combat."

I sighed. "It doesn't make me feel any better, Zaalbar. Yet, I suppose you're right. He wanted to die. I gave him that choice. Yet, I am thinking honor would have been better served not in death but in living."

Zaalbar nodded but then stated. "You are Jedi, not everyone believes the same."

I nodded. "That is true. I'll keep that in mind for the next Mandalorians I meet."

The others finally caught up with me.

* * *

 ** **~Juhani~****

My master dead and I wallowed in a pit of darkness. This grove was mine. The kath hounds were mine. They attacked everyone around me because I willed it. No one dare would reach me. No Jedi, no settlers, not even those foolish Mandalorians would be able to reach me without them dying. I would see that my place of dark power would remain untouched.

My master was a fool. She antagonized me. She warned me over letting my emotions and feelings control me. My blade ignited and we fought till my master fell beneath my blade. My master was dead, the Jedi would no longer accept me, I had fallen. I was powerful; I felt the swirl of power around me. Yet, then I felt them, a Jedi approached. How? They should have been dead by the kath hounds.

She approached me; I rose from my dark meditations.

"I WILL BE YOUR DOOM!"

She had others with her. My hand rose and I froze them, two men and a wookiee.

She came after me; she looked oddly familiar to me. I had seen this woman before. Where had I seen her? No matter, she would die.

Her blade work was like a dance, her green blade danced around my powerful emotional driven strikes. She fought me till I was tired and she had wounded me, and even still the wound was not a killing blow. My attacker didn't wish me dead. Why? I had fallen. Why wouldn't she kill me?

"You... you are strong. Stronger than me, even in my darkness."

She turned off her lightsaber and said calmly. "Who are you?"

"I am Juhani, and this is my grove. This is the place of my dark power. This is the place you have invaded. When I embraced the dark side, this was where I sought my solace. It is MINE!"

The woman said calmly. "You fell to the dark side and you corrupted the kath hounds, why?"

"Yes... aren't they pretty? My pets... They like the smell of power I exude. They know their master. I harnessed true power. When I slew my Master, Quatra, I knew I could never go back. And now I revel in my dark power."

The woman sighed. "Seems pretty lonely if you ask me, you're stuck here alone in this grove. No one here except you, your darkness, and the kath hounds."

"I had power….power enough to crush the life from someone such as you... or so I had thought..."

"You slew Quatra, your Master?"

"Yes, I struck her down in the middle of training, consumed by my anger, embracing the power of hate! But... it was not enough... What is it you want? Why do you bother me?"

The woman said softly. "I was sent by the council to cleanse the taint from this grove."

My ears flattened, this woman was here to kill me and end my darkness. "The Council has sent you here to kill me? Why, then, when you bested me so easily, did you not simply finish your task? Is it not apparent that I can never be saved?"

She shook her head. "Jedi don't kill and do you really believe that you can't be saved?"

I nodded. "I killed my master. The Jedi will never accept me back."

"Well I don't want to kill you. I have no desire to."

I raised my eyebrow. "You don't….I am pathetic. I sit here and think myself to be great by embracing the dark side, but I am nothing! There is no way I could be turned back! I always thought they held me back, were jealous of my power. But it is only because I was not good enough to meet their standards... I never have been."

The woman smiled softly yet said firmly. "Now….that's nonsense. You are a beautiful young woman with lots of potential."

I sighed. "I thank you for your kind words, Jedi."

"Your master still lives, Juhani. There is no death…..there is only the Force."

I nodded. "You are right but….If she were alive now, there would be so much I would say to her… So much I would apologize for. Oh, how can the Council ever take me back with what I have done? Striking my Master down in anger is unforgivable!"

"Anger? Show them that you have freed yourself of this base passion."

The woman was right and I told her, "If I show them I am free of passion... That I am serene... That I am willing to forsake the dark side. Maybe, just maybe, they would accept me back. Do you think they would? Could it be possible after what I have done?"

The woman smiled. "Of course, the Jedi are forgiving. Plus your inner peace and harmony will show them your sincerity."

"I... I thank you, master Jedi. I will return to the Council, then. I shall submit myself to their judgment, and hope that they will forgive me. Again, I thank you. I am sure I will hear great things about you in the future."

I got up and left the grove, my heart restored to me. This woman had brought me back from such despair. I would never have believed that she would care enough to spare my life.

Then my eyes went wide, spare my life. Of course, I knew her. Now I remembered this woman. She had come in simple Jedi robes, with short cut black hair. It felt like a lifetime ago. I was a poor Cathar slave on Taris. She had a smile on her face and a good nature about her. She used the Force and caused the slavers that were ready to sell me to run in sheer terror. She laughed lightly and I frowned and asked her what she had done. She said simply that she had showed them the fear that resided in their own hearts and manifested it before their eyes and that was what caused them to flee in terror. She had saved me. She had taken me from the slave auction and saved my life. She showed me the goodness of the Jedi and the Force. It was her actions that made me come here to become a Jedi. I didn't understand how this woman could be here? I turned back and looked at her. She had come with Revan, but hadn't those Jedi...? They had all gone off to fight the Mandalorians and didn't they all fall to the Dark side? How could this be? I owed this woman my salvation twice.

* * *

 ** **~Phoenix~****

My trial was complete. I felt completed. I would be a Jedi Padawan. Something about saving the Cathar made me feel good inside and felt like I had come to a measure of peace. I understood now, the Dark Side could be faced and defeated. It could be as simple as saying no, I deny you. It was so simple. Yet, poor Juhani had been misled by it in thinking there was no escape or no way to turn back. The danger of the Dark Side was, that it told you that you could never return from its sway. That wasn't true, Juhani was proof of that. I now believed I could face those ruins that the council wanted me to face. The coldness was my own coldness made manifest and the Force or the Dark Side merely amplified it back at me, like staring at a mirror. I now understood that and I had everything I needed to know to face the ruins that I couldn't face earlier.

I looked at my friends. "Come on….let's head back to the Enclave."

Carth smiled. "Padawan Star has a nice sound to it, doesn't it?"

I grinned. "Yea, and so does Admiral Carth Onasi."

Carth laughed. "Oh….so you can see into the future now, can you?"

I laughed. "No, I just wanted to inflate your ego. Besides, you'd look good with a few extra stripes on you."

Carth chuckled. "Come on Jedi Star; let's get you back to your masters so you can claim your rank as a padawan."

 ** **~o0o~****

Returning to the Enclave I saw Elise. She had a big smile on her face. Her droid was by her. She smiled softly at the droid and rubbed his chest plating, "Aren't you just a sweet little droid, yes you are!"

She turned toward me. "Oh, thank you! Thank you! I don't know what I would have done if I had lost him!"

"Umm….."

"It's just so great to have him back! We're just going to go right home, right now, and celebrate, aren't we, my lovely little droid? Don't worry, I'm going to hug you and oil you and care for you and make sure you never ever get away again. "They proceeded to walk away from us.

The droid gave a long pause and looked at me. "Please kill me..."

Carth looked at me. "I don't think I've ever felt so bad for a droid before."

Canderous meanwhile laughed. "Ha! I guess that droid is really going to to serve his master tonight!"

I shook my head. "I...uhhh…..should have seen that coming."

We entered the courtyard and I went to Jon and I said calmly. "The Mandalorians will trouble you no more. Their leader is dead."

"Thank you, young Master. My daughter can now, I think, rest in peace. Here is the reward I promised you."

I shook my head. "No, a reward is not necessary."

"No, please, take it. This pitiful amount will never be enough for what you have done for me. Again, I thank you. I will be sure to tell the Council of your great deed. Thank you for exacting my revenge on those Mandalorian beasts. If only I could have been the one to tear out Sherruk's heart."

I took the credits quietly and stuck them away into my pouch.

* * *

A/N: Want to thank people for reviews. They are the credits to my galactic account. :)

Anyway, thanks to Ether for pointing out that I had spelled Mandalorian wrong. I went over most of my chapters and corrected it. I might have missed a few of them but I think I got most of them. Oh and I am totally snickering over the whole I am not Revan I am Phoenix Star…..that just happened to fit into this chapter, of course at this point time she's very much sincere about it. Anyway….on to claim that Padwan rank.


	35. Chapter 34: Dantooine: Master Deceptions

**Chapter 34: Dantooine: Master Deceptions**

 **~Juhani~**

"Masters….I have returned for judgment. I will accept whatever punishment you wish for the death of my master."

I was nervous and I was afraid. The woman who redeemed me seemed to think the masters would forgive me. Yet all I had was the word of the woman who had saved me so long ago on Taris. There was also the question regarding her. Who was she? I had never gotten her name back on Taris and all the Jedi that had served under Revan had either died or had fallen to the Dark Side. So if my redeemer was here, did that mean….? I did not want to consider the sad fact that this woman had fallen to the Dark Side after her exploits on Taris. It seemed so tragic to me, because I had always believed the best out of my savior. She was a good woman, how could any of those Jedi that liberated Taris fall? Yet, if she was here then apparently she had been redeemed as well. If the Jedi could redeem her then perhaps there was hope for me.

Master Vrook looked at me, "So you have finally returned to us Juhani. It is good to see that you have come to accept responsibility for your actions."

"I have killed my Master Quatra….Master Vrook. How can I accept responsibility for that? I have nothing I can accept in responsibility for my actions, except my life for hers."

Master Vandar shook his head, "Your humility is noted, Juhani daughter of Juhana and Solus. However, your master is not dead. You may have wounded her severely but Master Quatra only feigned her death."

My jaw dropped, "How could my master….."

Master Zhar spoke quickly before I could finished my statement, "It was her wish that you learn how your emotions could drive you to a dangerous outcome. She wanted you to know that the Dark Side was indeed an outcome that could occur to you."

Master Vrook stated firmly, "Jedi do not take life in exchange for life, Juhani. While your statement is noble, your intent is flawed. However, Juhani there is a way you can accept responsibility for your actions."

"How Master Vrook?"

"Devote yourself to the Order and spend your life in service to the Jedi, Juhani. In the end, your life belongs not only to the Jedi but to the Force."

Master Vandar nodded, "Yes, commit yourself to the Order, Juhani."

I nodded, "Yes, masters…..I will commit my life to the Order. I will prove to you that I am redeemed."

Master Dorak stated calmly, "Coming to us, Juhani already proves that you are redeemed. You are free to go."

I stood in the council and did not leave.

Master Vandar spoke, "More you have to say, Juhani?"

I nodded, "Yes, Master Vandar, the woman…..the one you sent after me to cleanse the grove. Who is she? I have seen her before. So many years ago, it seems like a lifetime. I know you know my history, Masters. I was going to be sold a slave on Taris. This woman was with the Jedi that were with Revan. They were going off to war against the Mandalorians. She saved my life, she told me to seek out the Order. But I thought….well the Jedi who were with Revan fell...to the Dark Side. Who is this woman?"

The Masters were quiet for several minutes, I had no answer, and it appeared that the Masters were uncertain about what to say, if there was any communication between the Masters, aside from perhaps communication through the Force, I was unaware of it.

Finally Master Dorak spoke, "She was a Dark Jedi who served with Darth Revan. Her story is complicated, Juhani. During Bastila's confrontation with Darth Revan, Bastila saved her. However, her mind was severely damaged. She has no memory of you, Juhani. It was the wisdom of the council that the council give her a new life and a new identity, in the hopes of redeeming her. However, even with her mind damaged, she contains much information regarding her time with the Dark Lord. We need her memories to help us to defeat Darth Malak. You must not say anything to her connecting her to your past, Juhani. If she were to find out who she once was….it could harm the Order, it could harm her. To all in the Order, she is known as Phoenix Star. Her old name is dead."

I stood dumbfounded, "But she saved me….not just on Taris, but now."

Master Vandar nodded, "And you have aided in her redemption as well, Juhani."

I nodded and then said, "Masters…..wherever her path lays….." I paused, "May I please join her. She….means a lot to me, even now."

Master Vrook said calmly, "We must discuss this, Juhani. We will let you know our decision."

"Thank you Masters…." I bowed respectfully and left the council chamber.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I smiled softly as Phoenix returned to the Enclave, I stood waiting for her outside the Enclave. She seemed much more in peace than she had before. Perhaps her trial had been a good thing for her. She looked at the others who had went with her. The bond. She knew. She knew we needed to talk.

She turned to the others, "Carth, Canderous, Zaalbar, could you return to the Hawk. Bastila and I have much we need to discuss."

I nodded, "That we do, Phoenix."

Canderous and Zaalbar nodded and went to the Hawk. Carth however, stayed put. A firm look on his face told me he was going to stay put regardless. He held tightly onto Phoenix's hand.

"I am staying with Phoenix, Bastila. Whatever you have to say to her you can just as well say to…."

Phoenix shook her head, "I am sorry, Carth. This is Jedi stuff. You'd be bored shitless over it."

Carth frowned, "Try me Phoenix. I understand you have this little Jedi thing going on here, but I want to be a part of it and I want to be a part of it with you."

I sighed, "Carth….I understand how you feel about Phoenix but….this is business of a private nature. You're a Republic solider and….what I have to say is for Jedi ears only."

Carth glared angrily, "Fine. I just don't like being left out of the loop, Let me know when you're ready to let me back into the affairs of the galaxy."

Carth stormed off and Phoenix cringed a bit. I sighed, "I am sorry, Phoenix, but it's really better that….your feelings for Carth….."

Phoenix suddenly turned on me, "What of it, Bastilia?"

"Relationships are fraught with peril. Such extremes are to be avoided. Anger and hate are the worst, but even love can lead to folly."

"And what's so wrong with that?"

"Please, you mustn't say things like that. The dark side is destruction and chaos, the opposite of all that gives the universe order and purpose. You have to understand this."

"It sounds to me like you're jealous, Bastila, I've felt your feelings for me."

"A mistake. I had a moment of weakness, I assure you." I tried really hard once again to block out what I was feeling. I really wanted Phoenix to kiss me, to kiss me like she had when she had kissed Carth. Yes, I had felt her giving into her passions and kissing Carth. I wanted the same.

She suddenly leaned into me and I was alarmed when suddenly, her lips came onto mine and my heart pounded heavily within my chest. Her kiss took my breath away, I wanted to push her away, but I found my arms around her and I could no longer deny her. The kiss. It was what I had wanted. She suddenly let go and, she grinned, "That was…..." She licked her lips some, "Interesting."

However the moment was short lived when she suddenly turned red with embarrassment or perhaps it was shame, "I shouldn't have done that….I….I don't know, I….wanted... hell I don't know what I wanted... I just acted….."

"Now you understand, Phoenix. We can't let our passions drive us."

She shook her head, "Sithspit, Bastila, it's that damn bond. It's messing with my head. Don't act so innocent, Bastila. You wanted that kiss, don't deny what you felt. I felt your feelings, your desires and I gave into it because I do have some personal feelings for you as well. Now I feel like hutt spawn because I have feelings for Carth as well. This damn bond, it made me betray my feelings for him."

She stormed off and I sighed, she was right, as much as I tried to hide my feelings, the closer Phoenix got to Carth, the more jealous I was becoming. I wanted to kiss her and she had acted upon it, our bond made us both give into my own base desires. I could sense her….she was running off to be with Carth and some minutes later I could feel her, giving in and consummating her love with him. I had failed to rein in what I had felt and she ended up going after her own base desires. I could do nothing, even if I said something to the masters, the fault would be mine. They would not act against me or Phoenix, because they needed both of us to act against Malak and explore the ruins. I sighed, I still hadn't quite discussed the other concerns that we needed to talk about.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I ended up back on the Hawk. I found Carth brooding in the cockpit of the Hawk. I grinned lightly, "Hey Republic."

He frowned, "That was quick with you and Bastila."

I sighed, "Don't ask. We had….ummm I guess you could say a disagreement."

I plopped down in the co-pilot's seat. He sighed, "I see. I am sorry I got upset."

"Look you had every right to be upset, Carth. Like I said, Bastila and I had a disagreement, mainly over you."

Carth raised an eyebrow, "Really?"

"Love and attachment are forbidden and acting on it can cause you to fall to the Dark Side crap. But I am not listening to that bantha poodoo. Anyway, speaking about love, my trial is complete….and I did say…."

Carth chuckled, "My Raven, you don't waste time do you?"

He carefully went over and locked the cockpit door. I quietly undid the sash holding onto my apprentice robes letting the whole Jedi garment fall to the floor. I watched as his jacket and everything he wore also came falling to the cockpit floor. He carefully fingered my bare back, tracking his fingers down my back. I sighed and leaned into his chest, breathing in what smelled like engine grease, sweat from fighting on the plains of Dantooine, along with all the other scents of his unwashed musky body. "You smell good….Republic. I like it."

He chuckled, "It's just pilot and soldier smell….I swear."

"Well don't change anything about it. You are perfect, my love." He lifted his finger to my lips and said, "Shh….no more talk."

He grabbed onto me and I laughed as we tumbled on the floor of the Hawk. I gasped as he pushed into me and I grasped hold onto his body, and I moaned in pleasure, "Carth….don't….oh.. stop….no...don't stop...please….oh….the Force…."

He groaned, "No my Raven…...never…..."

 **~0o0~**

"Republic…" I twisted my fingers into the hairs of his chest. "My little gizka."

He carefully kissed my fingers, then my toes. I giggled as he kissed my toes and he chuckled, "You're ticklish aren't you?"

I snorted, "I am not."

He blew air on my feet and I tensed up and he laughed, "You are….I've found the weakness of this Jedi."

He ran his fingers down my feet. I started laughing, "Stop….."

He kept doing it and laughed, "Tickle torture…."

I grinned, "I surrender…" I rolled on top of him and then kissed him fully on his mouth.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

It had been a long time since I had made love to a woman like I had my wife. Phoenix made me forget my desire for revenge. Although I still wanted to kill Saul for what he had done to my family. I felt a bit more at peace. I chuckled as I lightly tickled her feet and she kissed me. She finally got up and got dressed. I didn't want her to go. She carefully hooked her lightsabers on her belt, "I really need to go talk to the masters."

"Aren't you worried that they might say something about….us?"

She shook her head, "I am pretty sure, Bastila knows about us. She wouldn't have tried to have a conversation with me about, love and the Dark Side if she didn't. I think….well the way our conversation ended; she won't be talking to the council anytime soon."

I frowned, "What, you didn't blackmail her or something like that?"

She shook her head, "What? By the Force, no. It's far too complicated than that, Carth. Way, way complicated. Bastila is my friend. I couldn't do that, at least not intentionally. Unintentionally…."

"What do you mean by that?"

She sighed, "Complicated, Carth and I'd rather not talk about it. I will say that my personal galaxy revolves around you, me, and her. Anyway, about the masters, I suspect that I am too important to whatever mission I have to do for them to simply cast me out of the Order. They might not like the fact that I just surrendered to my baser passions with you, but….there is little that they can do except perhaps give me a verbal tongue lashing and…." She grinned, "I am used to it, after all I had to deal with you on Taris."

I sighed, "I hope you're right, Phoenix. Yet, you seem to have a knack for urging people in a particular direction and getting people to do what you want. It's kind of scary actually."

She frowned, "What do you mean by scary?"

"I am just saying you seem to posses the ability to charm just about anyone to do what you want, including me."

Phoenix looked concerned, "Are you saying that I charmed you into a relationship and…."

I shook my head, "No, I went flying into that with my eyes wide open. Ever since Taris, we both tried to deny what we felt but…." I sighed, "I love you, Phoenix. I said it before, you're a natural leader. However, you tend to inspire people to follow you and do what you want. Hell, I'd follow you to the depths of the galaxy and then some."

She sighed, "Perhaps what happened with me and Bastila, isn't completely her fault. If what you're saying is true then…."

I frowned, "What happened with you and her?"

Phoenix didn't answer and walked off. I shook my head, "Damn Jedi and their infernal secrets."

The comm on the Hawk started to go off. I quickly dressed but my clothing looked rather rumpled, I answered to find Admiral Dodonna had called me.

Seeing my rumpled clothing on her end of the comm screen she said, "Carth, I hope I haven't caught you at a bad time."

I shook my head, "No….well…. if you had called about half an hour earlier…."

She frowned but said nothing. "I've called you to give you a preliminary update about the smuggler you had concerns about."

"And?"

"Your concerns are justified. It seems that this smuggler just sort of dropped off the map for years on end and then suddenly just reappeared. From what paperwork we've found, Phoenix Star was injured near the end of the Mandalorian wars. The Jedi say she had amnesia and the years she's been missing, she's really been with the Jedi being treated for these issues."

I frowned; Phoenix had said nothing regarding this. "So…."

Admiral Dodonna sighed, "Well….her story checks out though. Phoenix Star was from a merchant and farmer family on Deralia. When the Mandalorians invaded, they took out a lot of the colony's infrastructure. There are records of the deaths of a Jaden Star, Aurora Star, and a son named Kalon Star. They owned a winery and farmed the land. There are records of mid-rim shipments between a Phoenix Star and various companies. We even found a record of her doing business with Czerka corporation, although records are a bit murky on that business. Our intelligence had to bribe a few Czerka officials, but it looks like transactions for weapons. Some of the weapons well….I wouldn't exactly call them legal by Republic standards."

I nodded, "So her story checks out….."

Admiral Dodonna nodded, "But….here's the thing, we also found a record for a Phoenix Naberrie on Naboo."

"Naboo….."

"Yes, because apparently, Phoenix Star has relatives on Naboo. It seems kind of strange that there is another Phoenix in the records. We're trying to figure out where this lead goes Carth."

"Are you saying Phoenix Star is a lie?"

Admiral Dodonna shook her head, "No, I am not saying that Carth. We still have a lot of paperwork and leads to go through. Relations do happen to name family after each other. I was named after my great grandmother on my father's side. So don't try and jump to conclusions Carth. We still don't have a lot to go on with this investigation. I am just saying there is a lot of Jedi overreach with your smuggler, enough to warrant your concern."

I nodded, "I see, Admiral. Well thanks for the update. It's very much appreciated." The comm transmission suddenly faded out.

I ran my fingers through my hair, I had just made love to a woman whose past might not be as it seemed. I suddenly wished I hadn't have given Admiral Dodonna permission to go through Phoenix's past. I had a sinking feeling I wasn't going to like the answers.

* * *

A/N: And I was going to continue but decided to leave it on this note. As for Juhani, I looked everywhere trying to find names for her parents. Apparently I can't find any on any Star Wars site. If anyone does, please let me know, So I came up with some names. Thanks to my reviewers Ether and kosiah for corrections, comments, concerns. I rather enjoy roughing up the canon and then some.


	36. Chapter 35: Dantooine: Tell the truth

**Chapter 35: Dantooine: Tell All the Truth but Tell it slant….**

 **~Phoenix~**

I proceeded to walked to the council chamber to see Master Zhar.

 _You can't have both, Phoenix, I warned you. Yet, you kissed Bastila and you made love with Carth. You will lose both of them if you do not choose._

I sighed, apparently my dark voice had returned again in full force, and I muttered to myself, what do you know? You're just some disembodied voice that doesn't even know who or what you are. And what do you know of love?

 _I am a part of you so I know you. I may not know who I am, but I know you. As for love…_

The voice paused a moment and there was a light chuckle in the voice. _You have had a really bad habit of going for messy romances in your past._

I frowned. Wait a minute, you said you didn't know who you are and you say past. I snorted, are you lying to me?

The voice laughed. _Ahh you are learning. What is truth? What are lies? In the end does it matter? I am a part of you, so if I am lying, you are only lying to yourself._

I snorted, cryptic. I hate cryptic, you sound like one of the masters.

 _Perhaps you are a master of the Force, Phoenix and you do not know it._

 **WHAT?** Who are you?

 _As I said, I am a voice that will not be denied and I am a part of you._

I muttered to myself, you're giving me a blinking headache.

The voice laughed, _that means your mind is working. As for love…you had a choice in the past._

So you know me, what choice did I make before?

The voice sighed; _you wish to know….very well. Although you may not like the answer you hear._

Stop evading me, tell me….

 _Your heart was cold, you thought of love merely as a means to an end. Love was a shrewd way to bind you to alliances and power. And that is not love, Phoenix._

What alliances? What power? This sounded like a bunch of bantha poodoo. A lie, it had to be a lie. The voice admitted that it could be untruthful. My last love was Sorran Naberrie, my third cousin. He's still on Naboo, last I checked. We broke up. He did not approve of my smuggling life. He wanted me to settle down, wanted me to rebuild my life with him. I couldn't do it. My heart was restless and I ached from the death of my family.

The voice laughed. _S_ _ _orran, oh dear old Sorran Naberrie, another broken heart. At least you are consistent when it comes to breaking and twisting hearts to your will. You made a choice. You chose to be a smuggler. And that is not love either. Amusing that you think I am lying, Phoenix Star. Have you considered the fact that I may be telling you the truth? But then again you may be right, I maybe lying...__

The voice laughed before disappearing altogether and said mockingly, _T_ _ _ell all the truth but tell it slant….The truth must dazzle gradually or every man be blind….__

I felt sick and my head was throbbing, this damn voice wasn't helping. It was just as bad as my bond with Bastila. I should have figured the voice was lying; it was after all of the Dark side. Forget the council. I felt like my head was going to split open. I managed to make it to the med section in the Enclave.

"Ahh…..apprentice….you do not look well."

I looked at Master Jax. "Please Master Jax, my head. It hurts."

She frowned. "I heard you had your trials given to you."

I nodded and she said calmly, "Did you complete them?"

I nodded and she said. "It sounds like you have over extended yourself, perhaps a bit of over excitement over the fact that you are now a Padawan. It happens. Lay down and I will help you."

I lay down on the bed and the healing master looked at her scans from my bed. She frowned at me, "Hmm…"

I frowned. "What?"

"Oh nothing….just a bit of a deviation from your last medical scan. The pleasure and emotional centers of your brain seem to be over stimulated, quite highly actually. One could think…you've been on stims."

I looked skyward and gave a long sigh. "Ummm….that could be because…."

"Because of what padawan…."

I wondered how much I should say. "I….well….there's this Republic pilot….and..."

Jula chuckled at my words. "Ahh….I see….padawan, that would explain much for the levels of brain activity I see. They seem quite all over the place"

I turned a deep shade of burgundy red and Master Jax laughed. "Your secret is safe with me, padawan. You're not the only Jedi to have sought out company and companionship in a soldier's bed."

I suddenly glared at her. "Carth is not some ordinary soldier….Master Jax."

She bowed her head. "Forgive me, I did not mean disrespect. Perhaps I should have been more tactful. What I meant to say is you're not the only Jedi to have a relationship. There was Nomi and Ulic, and that was a tragic tale of love. It is probably why the Jedi are not into relationships because relationships plagued those two members of the Order, but love shouldn't be feared, padawan." She paused and she said quietly. "But do not let the other Masters especially the council know I've said that." She sighed. "I too have loved and lost…."

I looked at Master Jax. "Really?"

Master Jax nodded. "I lost my husband during the war with Exar Kun. He chose Exar, over the Order and even over me. There is no love on the Dark Side, padawan. If such a thing exists, it is a mockery of what once was held dear. The pain love causes can hurt, but if I had to do it all over again padawan, I would do it once more. I am an old matronly woman now, and many of the padawans and knights no longer hold much respect for me, because of my past. I live a quiet life and spend most of my time here in this little corner of the Enclave."

She sighed and then pulled a packet of herbs and quietly mixed them with hot water in a cup. She smiled softly and a few minutes later she handed me the tea, "Here child, drink this. This will ease your headache."

I nodded and slowly drunk the tea.

"Master Jax….may I ask you a question?"

She nodded. "You may ask."

"Why did you stare at me that first day?"

"I told you the Force is strong with you. You remind me of so many Jedi I've seen in the past."

"Did you know Revan and Malak like the other masters here?"

Jax sighed. "Yes, I knew of them. They were friends. Some say more than friends. Hard to tell with those two, especially Revan. I think Malak wanted more than friendship, yet Revan rejected him for someone else."

I frowned. "Who?"

Master Jax shook her head. "I believe you heard the name before, padawan."

I frowned. "I have?"

"Yes, padawan….Liam Mandrel, the Jedi who was exiled for following Revan."

"So Revan chose another Jedi over her friend, Malak…."

I cringed a bit, my head was throbbing. "Master how does one refuse….well like Revan did with Malak?"

"Easy….you say no."

"And if they still insist."

"Well…..you find a stronger way to say no."

I finished the tea and handed Master Jax the cup and then I muttered. "I bet Revan didn't have to deal with a damn Force bond, driving them crazy."

"Ahh Force bonds. You obviously speak of the bond you have with Padawan Shan, don't you?"

I nodded.

Master Jax smiled softly. "There is a way to keep a bond from driving you padawan."

"How?"

"Pazaak."

"What? I don't understand."

"I do not speak of the game, it is the cards themselves. You can block out many things by thinking of other things. It is just that your focus must be fully concentrated on it. You have a pazaak deck, do you not?"

I chuckled. "Of course."

"Then use it. Count the cards. Other things work as well, padawan. Count ticks in the hyperdrive, list things in your mind, I am sure this will help you."

My headache was finally gone. "Thank you, Master Jax. You conversation has been very helpful."

She smiled softly. "Of course, padawan. Oh one more thing, please do not mention my conversation with Padawan Shan. For some odd reason, she does not like me very much. As I said, the knights and padawans have little respect for me anymore because of my past. I chose love and as you see I have not fallen. Perhaps I am a bit too shadowy and gray for their liking. They would rather a Jedi fit into a nice little hole of conformity. I do not and I am an anomaly. Yet, I am a good healer. The council and Order needed me during the war with Exar Kun and they need me for this war as well. So many wounded Jedi and my skills are not without a price. I feel pain and suffering on a daily basis. Healing deals with empathy. Empathy is close to compassion, which is close to love."

Jax gave a long sigh. "Anyway you don't wish to hear the stories of an old healer woman. Go on….get out of here padawan. Try not to see me again so soon. It is better to keep in good health than to find yourself here."

I nodded and left the healer and her section of the Enclave. I sighed at least she gave me some ideas on how to keep Bastila out of my mind and perhaps resist the influence of the bond she had with me. I decided to try it. I pulled out my pazaak deck and began counting the cards. _The_ _ _card drawn is 10 the next card drawn is 5 equals 15. The next card drawn is 6. That's too high as the total is now 21, a minus 1 card from my side deck and the total is 20 that is__ _pazaak._ _ _New card drawn…the card drawn is 2….__

 **~o0o~**

Master Zhar smiled at me. "So you have completed your trial and redeemed Juhani from the grove. Congratulations….appren….no I should say Padawan. You are now officially a member of the Jedi."

"Master….do I have a knight to guide me? My readings of the Order state that I usually have a master or a knight assigned to train me."

Zhar sighed. "The numbers in our Order are sadly….dwindling, Padwawn. What knights we have are stretched to breaking across the galaxy and there are so few masters. I have finished guiding you padawan that now I must train another. This takes time. We now sadly must resort to having older more experienced padawans teach other padawans. You will be assigned to Bastila, Padawan. She will be a good example to you."

I cringed a bit.

"Oh you do not agree."

I sighed. "Master I mean no offense but we are too clos…."

Zhar interrupted me. "Your Force bond is the reason for this, padawan."

I frowned, I felt like I was being fostered upon Bastila whether I liked it or not. I sighed. "I understand….then the decision who I am assigned to is not mine."

"You and Bastila share a special link. You cannot deny this, padawan. She is the one the Force has ordained to you. The council feels that together you will accomplish much against Darth Malak."

I shook my head. "I see…."

Zhar then said. "Come Padawan….let us dress you the robes of a Jedi and not the robes of an apprentice and there is the matter of your padawan braid. It is a solemn ceremony. If we were in times of peace….we would have more of a long drawn out ceremony, as it is...the ceremony has been curtailed to one of necessity."

My eyes brightened. "Master Zhar….may my friends join me in this ceremony of necessity."

He nodded. "It is good to have the support of others around you, so yes….they may come."

* * *

 **~Mission~**

This was big. I couldn't believe it; one of my best friends was going to be officially a member of the Jedi Order. I wished I had something better to wear than the Echani armor that Nix passed onto me. She basically stated that because she was going to be Jedi, she could no longer wear the armor. She polished it up till it gleamed. After Taris, Nix was the closest thing I had to….well to a mother, nah…not a mother. She was way, way too lax to be like a mother. More like an older sister. Shoot, I was glad I got Carth and her together. Those two deserved to be with each other, even though they could use a good room.

The Hawk was way too small not to know everybody's business. I didn't even want to think what was going on with the Ebon Hawk cockpit door locked earlier. I hadn't meant to umm…pry I just…well…I wanted to congratulate Nix on finishing her trials. I went up to the cockpit and…it was locked good and tight. I thought about slicing the door open because no one keeps Mission Vao out. However, Zaalbar pushed me away from the cockpit area and said that humans in a mating ritual shouldn't be bothered. How the heck would he know a mating ritual was going on? Course, wookiees have a really good sense of smell….maybe…nah…that's disgusting.

I even got Zaalbar to take a bath in the refresher. Yea, no kidding, because getting a wookiee to do that sort of thing, a sun might as well go nova. Yet, despite all his protests and moans about how wookiees don't take baths, and don't dye or brush their fur. I managed to convince him to do it for Nix.

"Big Z….let's get going. I know Nix is waiting for us. This is a big moment in her life and we don't want to miss it."

I also motioned for T3 to come along with us, sure he was a part of this crew just as much as anyone. The droid beeped in a joyful exclamation and rolled forward.

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

I rolled over to the Hawk's central nets and plugged in…

Accessing….Look up human mating rituals. Human reproduction in conjunction with human behavior.

All the organics on the Ebon Hawk were talking about this from Phoenix and Carth. Confused? What is this thing that Phoenix was taking part with Carth?

The nets gave me a mountain of information, some of it was what organic based lifeforms would call pornography. I beeped a rather confused query and kept searching process of reproduction, Carth and Phoenix were going to have smaller units, well that is what the nets said. How long did that take? I did another scan on the nets. Nine standard sub-cycles. I beeped joyously at this news. Finally there would be smaller units that would be smaller than me. I would no longer be the smallest lifeform unit on this ship.

I beeped away pleased at my discovery when Mission asked me to come with them. I beeped a query as to why?

When I didn't roll along with her she paused. "Nix is becoming a Padawan, T3. You're part of the crew here too. So come on let's get to the Jedi Enclave."

Nix? Oh….that was what Mission titled Phoenix. I beeped affirmatively and rolled along with Mission.

Phoenix, a Jedi, a padawan? That was a new development. I wasn't sure how this would change things around the Hawk. Yet, the human female Bastila and now Phoenix seemed to put a great amount of concern on it, therefore this was important.

* * *

 **~ Canderous ~**

I didn't really want to go, but I had been invited by Phoenix. The girl deserved respect. There was something about her that didn't strike me as Jedi. She was a strong capable girl that had a warrior's gleam in her eyes. I couldn't put my finger on it but what I did know was that I had to follow her. Whatever path lay with her and the Jedi it was worthy of my focus and my skills. I couldn't ignore an invitation to some mystical Jedi ceremony. Phoenix would have been insulted if I didn't come. Plus, I knew this girl would be no ordinary Jedi. Heh….I heard her and that damn Republic pilot moaning, groaning, and rooting around like a couple of kath hounds in heat. Course I wasn't surprised that everyone else had found about it as well. The Hawk was a small ship. It would be hard to hide anything like that. I laughed as the wookiee, shooed the blue twi'lek away from the cockpit area.

Phoenix was definitely not your normal Jedi. That had to be a plus as far as I was concerned. She was a lot better than that damn Jedi princess Bastila. How in Concord Dawn did those two get thrown together? They were like fire and water. Phoenix tried to defer herself to Bastila. I could tell Phoenix struggled and chaffed at Bastila's will. I had a feeling one of these days, one of them would dominate the other. My bet was on Phoenix. Her personality, her strength of will was far stronger than miss prissy Jedi Princess Bastila.

I had to admit Phoenix had a strange sense of nobility about her. She decreed that her fight with Sherruk was not honorable combat. Maybe she was right. She had a stubborn way of butting in and finding fault with Mandalorian ways, scolding them and condemning them. Any proper Mandalorian would probably try and kill her for her chastisement by saying she was an outsider and knew no better. However, I didn't want to admit it but she was right in many respects. How could the Mando'ade be reorganized if all of its warriors insisted in combat to the death or requested to be killed for failure? Maybe Phoenix Star had the right idea. It was time to consider her ideas a bit more carefully for the sake of survival.

I polished up my armor and made sure my hair was properly combed I proceeded to the Enclave. I ran into Carth as he walked to the Enclave as well. I poked him a bit in the side. "Nice going, Republic. Congratulations on your conquest of a fine woman."

He nearly paled. "Does everyone know suddenly about me and Phoenix? I ran into Mission and she just grinned at me and Zaalbar patted me on the back like I am some sort of mighty wookiee hunter."

I laughed. "Carth it's a small ship. It's kind of hard to hide the fact that you two made enough noise to be like a couple of kath hounds in heat. If you want to hide the fact that you two are making love, you really need to find a better place to do it. "

Carth sighed. "I'll keep that in mind, Canderous."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Did everyone know me and Phoenix's business? I felt rather embarrassed that everyone knew that Phoenix and I had made love to each other. Although in all honesty Canderous was right. The Ebon Hawk was a small ship and it was sort of hard to hide things from others on that ship. I needed to talk to Phoenix about this, how were we going to have a relationship if it seemed that everyone knew exactly when we were sleeping with each other? This could be a definite problem, particularly with Bastila around. Bastila seemed to take no small pleasure in bugging Phoenix about her and me. I seriously needed to talk to Bastila and tell her in no uncertain terms that Phoenix and I were going to pursue a relationship whether she liked it or not.

We entered the council chambers, the smell of incense wafted through the area. Standing in the middle of the room was Phoenix as well as Bastila. Upon seeing me, she winked at me and then focused her attention on the Masters.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I stood in the middle of the council hall, dressed in the brown robes of a Jedi. Master Vandar spoke calmly. "Kneel down on the floor Apprentice Phoenix Star…."

I knelt calmly on the floor. "Today we welcome a new padawan into our Order. Normally, the padawan would have a knight or master take her for training. However….these are difficult times and the Order does not have enough knights or masters for Apprentice Star to have a master or a knight take her on for training. Instead, we assign Padawan Bastila Shan to guide her friend and fellow padawan in the Order, to strength her and help her in the ways of the Force."

"Padawan Bastila Shan, do you accept this responsibility in watching and guiding your friend and fellow Padwan in the Order?"

"I do Master Vandar…."

"Apprentice Phoenix Star, Padawan Bastila Shan has willing accepted you as a friend and fellow padawan into the Order. She promises to help you understand the ways of the Force and to train you in what she knows. Do you promise to uphold the Jedi code, honor and respect what teachings and guidance Padawan Bastila Shan can give you and respect the teachings she can give you?"

I nodded. "I do Master Vandar…."

Vandar nodded. "Bastila….please braid Phoenix's hair into the padawan's braid."

Bastila nodded and I watched as she went to the side of my hair and carefully began to braid one particular area of my hair into a padawan's braid.

"Apprentice Phoenix Star, the padawan braid represents your connection to the Force, to the Order and your own standing among the Jedi. The day you become a knight, your braid will be cut and you will stand among the Order as a knight."

Bastila finished doing the braid and Master Vandar spoke. "Both of you should remember that this is an experience of growth, and should teach you both."

Master Vandar came over and placed his clawed hand on my shoulder. "Padawan Phoenix Star, rise, you have taken your first steps into a larger world."

I arose and took a deep sigh; this was a lot to take in, I felt a deep sense of responsibility. I lightly fingered the new braid that now seemed to connect me to the Order and to the Jedi.

My friends smiled and Mission came over and hugged me. "Congratulations Nix…errr Padawan Nix."

I laughed lightly. "Padawan Nix….umm….Mission you really ought to call me Phoenix. You know what Padawan Nix sounds like…."

Mission shook her head. "No…but I have got a feeling you're going to tell me."

I grinned. "It sounds like I've been washed out. Geeze…Mission, talk about cursing me before I even start my first assignment as a Jedi."

Mission sighed. "Okay…okay…I don't want to jinx ya Nix. So if I call you Padawan, I'll call you Padawan Phoenix or better yet….maybe PP."

I groaned. "Never mind….I think I can live with Padawan Nix. PP is a horrible alternative that sounds even worse."

Mission chuckled. "Gotcha there didn't I?"

* * *

A/N All thanks goes to Emily Dickenson for the title for this….perhaps Emily was part Sith Lord or at least the fact that her poem fits perfectly into this plotline about lies and deception. Plus it honestly sounds like something Revan would say.

I also hadn't considered making Revan's other past love interest the Jedi Exile till I remembered my Chapter 28 chapter that Phoenix responds in a manner that makes her remember the exile and Bastila's response about Master Jax taking an incredible risk mentioning the Jedi Exile. I started writing and I remembered that and it just sort of clicked as to why Phoenix responded the way she did in that chapter.


	37. Chapter 36: Dantooine: The Ruins

**Chapter 36: Dantooine: The Ruins**

 **~Phoenix~**

My first day as a Jedi padawan, and I gave Carth a kiss and went off to see Bastila. Gee, I am getting kind of domesticated, aren't I? Something I vowed I'd never do as a smuggler as I didn't consider myself a domesticated kind of gal. However, I ended up kissing my guy, and promised I'd be back for him later. I wondered what was next, me bringing Carth his daily periodical on his data pad and a cup of caff? Somehow I doubted our lives would be like that at all.

I sighed; so much had changed for me since I had vowed never to be boxed in or attached to anyone. My life had changed dramatically in a short time. I had gone from being a smuggler on assignment by the Jedi, to being a Jedi padawan assigned to stop the Dark Lord Malak, and being involved with Carth Onasi. Arriving at Bastila's chambers, she was waiting for me. Both of us felt like we had so much to say and yet no way to say it. I wished truly I had never kissed her because it made things really awkward between us. There was absolutely no going back to what things were like before. My dark voice, despite how reliable or unreliable it was, was right. I couldn't have a relationship with both Carth and Bastila, it just wouldn't work. I couldn't hurt Carth, I just couldn't. He was fragile as it was considering what happened with him and Saul Karath. If I ended up having a relationship with Bastila, it would crush and tear him up inside.

Bastila, on the other hand, went towards a relationship kicking and screaming claiming that love was of the Dark Side and that such things were forbidden. At least Carth was willing to have a relationship despite the pitfalls of me being a Jedi. I had settled it up in my mind, I was Carth Onasi's girl and that settled that, at least I hoped so. I sighed and finally gathered the courage to speak to Bastila, "I suppose we didn't end our last conversation too well. We need to talk. I want to talk about that dream."

Bastila nodded in agreement, "It was less of a dream and more of a vision... a vision the two of us shared. But I am certainly willing to answer any questions the Jedi Council did not."

"I didn't lie to Master Vrook when I said I didn't know what you were talking about. I think I was more confused than anything. It was my dream not yours."

Bastila shook her head, "And are you so certain that it is not you in my dreams?"

I raised an eyebrow, not considering that fact. However, I was pretty sure that my crying fit I had after Vrook had nearly dashed my hopes in becoming a Jedi was the contributing factor for the dream in the first place and I said firmly, "Pretty certain, yes."

"I see. That is most likely vanity speaking, for I am not certain, myself. Regardless, our fates are linked... the vision was no doubt meant for us both."

I frowned, I didn't want to argue the fact that the dream had been mine and had been brought about by a fit of agitation on my part, "But of all things to dream about, why Revan? Why Malak?"

Bastila said calmly, "Perhaps because we desired to. Perhaps because they came to this planet and were strong enough in the Force to leave a... a trace."

I snorted, "I don't know about you, but I assure you dreaming about the Dark Lords of the Sith would not be what I would even wish or even consider dreaming about."

Bastila raised an eyebrow, "Oh….and what would you prefer to dream about, Phoenix? Let me guess…..a tall dark and handsome Republic pilot."

I glared at her; she was really testing the limits of Jedi patience. I took a calm breath, and started counted pazaak cards in my head. "I won't dignify that with a response, Bastila. You're trying to make me jealous or angry, or both. It's bad enough we're bonded together but using our bond to twist me around your finger. You can hang that up, Bastila."

Bastila sighed and then said sadly, "You're right. I am sorry. I shouldn't have done that. Like you, I am very much influenced by our bond. Please….forgive me."

I raised an eyebrow on that, did Bastila know about what happened with me and Carth? I thought about it and then groaned inwardly, probably. I couldn't even have a moment's bit of privacy with Carth without this damn bond.

I sighed, "I forgive you Bastila. Anyway…. isn't it a bit convenient to dream about our enemies?"

"And what else should we dream about except that which is most important to our fate?"

"Our fate? I am confused; I've been a smuggler for most of my life. I don't understand how suddenly and quite conveniently you and I start having visions of Revan and Malak. That's not normal, Bastila, explain that to me?"

"Are you wondering why we shared the vision? Or why we even received it in the first place? To the first I can only repeat the answer that the Council gave us. Our fates are linked, and for two as strong as we are in the Force that amounts to a near-physical bond. As to the second, I don't truly have an answer for you. The Force works as it will, and perhaps we should be grateful for what we have been given."

"So you're basically saying that conveniently we are having visions of our enemies….and the Force is guiding us. I don't buy it Bastila, you make it sound like the Force is some sort of living entity bending and twisting us to its will."

"The Force often seems to cause events that bend the laws of probability, especially with those that are strongly affiliated with it. In this respect, you and I will simply have to become accustomed to such 'convenience'. We are the tools of the Force and we will do as it wills. As for you saying the Force is some sort of living entity…. there is no evidence one way or the other. What you believe the Force to be ultimately will decide who you are."

"You make it sound like we have no free will whatsoever…"

"Quite the contrary. Ours is the ultimate free will. The Force is our destiny, but the choices we make along it are ultimately our own."

"And what if that choice is taken from you to begin with?"

Bastila frowned at me, her features suddenly scrunched up like a kinrath pup. "What do you mean?"

"I did not choose to be bonded or linked to you, Bastila. For one thing why would I want to be bonded to you or you to me for that matter? It again seems rather convenient."

"Dislike it or deny it all you want, Phoenix but we are linked together."

I sighed, "Yea, that's the thing… how did our fates become linked in the first place? We are so dynamically opposed as individuals, it makes little sense how this happened in the first place. I could understand a bond if we were similar in background or even personality, but we're not."

Bastila gave a long sigh, "I... I don't know. Believe me, I certainly don't find the prospect of being joined to you enjoyable in any fashion."

I snorted, "And believe me, Bastila the feeling is mutual, and the sooner we get whatever the council wants us to do over and done with the better. I dislike this bond immensely and I especially dislike the fact that I am bonded to you, if there was a physical way to cut the bond, I would because it's pretty obvious that this bond will eventually drive us both crazy."

"I agree with you on that completely, Phoenix. So let's go see the Masters right now so we can get sent out towards those ruins and complete our destiny."

"Fair enough…. "

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Revan/Phoenix was getting suspicious of everything. Why the bond? Why the dream? Why everything? I couldn't fault her, really I couldn't. It seemed that her implanted memory and persona was trying to come up with a rational explanation for what had happened to her since that ill-fated day on her flagship. Since Phoenix didn't have all the pieces in her mind, she was trying so very hard to fill in the gaps and fragments in her mind. It made me feel guilty, despite the fact that if Phoenix came to the realization that she was Darth Revan it could end badly for the whole galaxy.

So we slowly walked to the council chamber to receive our assignment to explore the ruins on Dantooine.

Phoenix turned to me and she said calmly, "Bastila….you know if I've seem a bit…upset over this whole bond and dream thing. I am sorry. It's just that...I am not use to this at all. I guess I really do need to trust the Force more than I have. If I've made you upset I am sorry. I am sorry about what happened earlier with us and….well…I'd like us to be friends, if that's possible."

I nodded and gave Phoenix a light pat on the shoulder, "I'd like that too, Phoenix. As for the dream and our bond, I understand. You're trying to figure out the rationale behind the bond and the dream we had. I hate to say it Phoenix, that sometimes there is no rationale for what the Force does. Sometimes it just happens. I suppose the longer you are a Jedi; you will eventually come to that realization. Since you haven't been a Jedi for that long, I can understand the desire to come up with a tangible explanation for everything that has happened to you."

Phoenix nodded and then said, "So a bit more trust in the Force and a bit less trying to grasp onto something tangible." She sighed, "I'll do my best at it, Bastila. I know the Force exists; too much has occurred for me to deny any of what has happened to me or the fact that I can manipulate the Force in such ways that seem prudent. You're absolutely right though, I haven't been a Jedi for all that long and I still want to try to come up with logical explanations. I simply need to let go and let the Force guide me."

I smiled and nodded, "You'll be a fine Jedi Knight, one of these days Phoenix. It's good for you to recognize these issues early on. The sooner you come to terms with them the stronger you will be in your ability to use the Force and accept its influence in your life."

We were still walking to the council when we happened to come upon Juhani. Phoenix had managed to redeem the woman. It pleased me that Phoenix had passed her trial in the fact that Revan would have killed her, but Phoenix had redeemed her.

Juhani smiled softly at Phoenix. "I must give you my thanks. Because of you, I am once again welcomed within the Jedi Order."

Phoenix nodded and then asked. "Did you learn anything more about Quatra?"

Juhani sighed. "Quatra's injuries were not so severe as I first believed. I was foolish to believe I could harm a Master such as she with my... my clumsy efforts. The fierce confrontation between us was nothing more than a part of my training. Quatra wanted me to understand the threat of the Dark Side, to see how easy it was to fall from the path of light."

Phoenix raised an eyebrow. "That seems like a pretty harsh way to teach a lesson."

"Quatra's methods may seem strange, but I trust her wisdom. The lesson has been difficult, but I am better because of it. Humility is never easy to teach, but now I truly understand my own limitations."

I nodded. "It is wise to understand one's own limitations and to have a good master to teach you to understand that."

Phoenix sighed. "I can't say that I fully approve of the way this lesson was taught, but you seem better for it, Juhani."

Juhani nodded. "I am…."

Phoenix then asked." "So… where is Quatra now?"

"After our last battle, Quatra had nothing left to teach me. I needed time alone to explore the turmoil of my own spirit. Only then was I ready to follow a guide – you – back to the light. When I left, Quatra knew her work with me was done. There are other disciples who need training throughout the galaxy, and she could not stay to see if I passed this most difficult trial."

I smiled softly at Juhani. "This has been a painful lesson, Juhani, but it seems you have learned it well. I am certain you will be a credit to the Order."

"I do not know what the Council has in store for me, but I will trust in the Force and the way of the Jedi to help me through whatever is to come."

We parted and entered the council chamber. Master Vandar spoke as we entered, although he mainly spoke to Phoenix. "Your training is now complete, young Padawan. And perhaps now it is time we dealt with the matter of the dream you and Bastila shared. When we heard of the ruins in your dreams, Master Dorak recognized it as one of a series of ancient structures here on Dantooine."

Master Dorak nodded. "These ruins have long been known to us, but we believed them to be merely burial mounds. Perhaps they are more than we first suspected, if Revan and Malak found something there."

Vandar continued." This one in particular lies to the east of this Enclave. We sent a Jedi to investigate... but he has not returned. Perhaps sending him in the first place was a mistake. The Force is guiding you through your visions; it may be that exploring the ruins is a task tied to your destiny. That is why the Council has now decided you should be the one to investigate this. The secrets to stopping Malak may be hidden within those ruins. You must investigate them and find what Revan and Malak were looking for."

Phoenix looked concerned. "What happened to the Jedi who went to investigate?"

"We do not know. That is one of the things you must investigate. We... fear the worst."

Phoenix nodded and was about to speak when….

Ahlan Matale, one of the biggest landowners on Dantooine stormed in right in the middle of our meeting, "I demand justice! The Sandral family is a blight upon Dantooine! They must be punished!"

Phoenix rolled her eyes at the man and muttered to me. "Geesh, talk about being rude, he could have waited till we were done speaking to the council."

I nodded and said softly. "Let's just wait and see what the council has to say."

Master Vandar spoke. "The Council will look into this matter, Mr. Matale. You must be patient. Your accusations have no proof, and we do not want you stirring up trouble with the Sandrals if there is some mistake."

Ahlan snorted. "Mistake? My son Shen is missing! How can there be any doubt the Sandrals are to blame?"

Vrook stood firm and stated. "There are other possible explanations for your son's disappearance."

"Bah! You Jedi are good for nothing but talk! I shall only wait so long before I take action on my own!"

Ahlan stormed out of the council chamber.

Master Vandar sighed. "As dangerous as the threat from Darth Malak and the Sith may be, we Jedi cannot simply abandon our other responsibilities. The Council has promised Alhan Matale we will look into his son's disappearance. Should you have time, padawan, you may want to investigate this matter."

Phoenix said calmly. "These two families, what's going on with them?"

Vandar stated calmly. "These two families have been settled here for some years now..."

Master Vrook shook his head and interrupted Master Vandar."And causing me no end of trouble!"

Phoenix chuckled lightly and Vrook said. "This is no laughing matter, padawan. These two families have been feuding ever since they have settled here."

"Well what started the feud, Master Vrook?"

Vrook shook his head and shrugged and Master Vandar stated."I do not know how the original feud started, but they want nothing to do with each other. As you may have heard, Ahlan Matale believes that his son, Shen, has been kidnapped by Nurik Sandral."

Master Dorak sighed. "Actually, the original feud started when Ahlan claimed that Nurik stole his prized Marrovian pig. Of course Nurik denied it but Ahlan claims he smelled the pig being cooked on the Sandral's property. Nurik finally claimed the pig was trespassing on his property and eating his crops. So he took the pig as compensation. As you can see padawan, this feud has been going for quite some time. As for the current state of this feud, Nurik's son Casus has been missing for some time as well... I fear Nurik may suspect Ahlan in this..."

Phoenix sighed. "I get the idea, two feuding farming families. My family had similar issues back on Deralia. It happens because of either a desire or a lack of resources. In the end, the feud was settled by both of our families by each family selling a small strip of land and creating a neutral boundary line. This boundary was managed by a neutral party that made sure we both didn't cross that boundary. Both of our families paid for that management. It kept the peace and the feuding diminished, it seems to me that both the Sandrals and Matales would benefit from such an arrangement."

Master Vrook nodded. "I see….padawan. Perhaps it would be wise to send you out to find out the situation of this feud. Your knowledge of such things would be beneficial."

Phoenix nodded. "I will see to it, Master Vrook."

He then added. "If Shen Matale is not returned to his father it may ignite a savage and bloody feud between the Matale and Sandral estates. We must not allow that to happen. It is in the real world that we truly prove ourselves worthy of the title Jedi. You would do well to remember this, young padawan."

Phoenix nodded and I stated. "This task has its own importance. It may also serve to divert our minds for a short time... something which carries its own rewards"

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Phoenix smiled at me as Bastila, me, and her set out on some task from the Jedi Order to see some old ruins that nearly crippled Phoenix the last time she went towards them.

I could tell that Bastila really didn't want me on this task but, Phoenix insisted upon it and in fact she refused to go unless I went with them. I squeezed tight onto Phoenix's hand and decided this was probably the best time to let Bastila know in no uncertain terms how I and Phoenix stood.

"Bastila, I think it's time for you to know that Phoenix and I…"

Bastila shook her head. "I know….and as much as I rather you didn't pursue a relationship with Phoenix." She looked firmly at both of us, "There is so much I could tell you on why you two shouldn't have a relationship other than the fact that it goes against everything we have been taught as Jedi." She suddenly sighed. "Yet I can see….that both you and Phoenix seem driven to this particular path. I do have to warn you…the path you are on, it will be filled with pain, anger, jealousy, maybe even hate. These very emotions may lead both of you down the path of the Dark Side. Since you both seem to refuse to listen to me, all I can do is constantly warn you both of your decisions"

Phoenix quickly interjected. "Bastila, maybe I want to take that risk. The risk is after all mine to take."

Bastila shook her head. "Are you sure of that Phoenix? You do realize your actions could have dangerous consequences not only for yourself and Carth but for the galaxy as well. I don't have to remind you the risk of a fallen Jedi to the galaxy. The story of Darth Revan and Malak is enough to warn you of that. Plus is Carth so willing to take that risk with you as well?"

I frowned. "Look Bastila, it's all nice of you to be the noble Jedi on this but Phoenix and I….we love each other and no matter what we face, we will face it together."

Bastila sighed. "Very well….all I can do is try and keep you both strong."

We ended up reaching the ruins….

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The cold ominous ruins were a barrier to me last time, but this time I refused to let the Dark Side turn me away. The cold chilled against me but I was strong. My friends were with me and my dark voice was right, I needed the connection of my friends. They were my strength and I believed that together we could do anything. I smiled softly as I grasped Carth's hand and I rubbed our hands and fingers against the cold and oily stones of the door. It would not budge and I wondered how did Revan open this with Malak? I thought back on the vision. Revan didn't really open it with his hands at all, which meant the Force was involved in this.

I sighed, and carefully reached out with the Force and focused it on the doorway. The doorway suddenly budged and carefully opened. It was dark and hard to see and I found myself grasping for a glow stick. Carth and Bastila did the same. We walked down the dark corridor of the ruins. I looked around, Master Dorak was right, this seemed to be a burial mound as well as there were strange looking bones of aliens that looked nothing like any alien I had seen in the galactic records. The bones seemed to be coated with a strange coating of some sort that seemed to perfectly preserve the bones from decay.

"Bastila….look!"

She nodded and came over to look at the bones. "I do not recognize the bone structure of what kind of alien this is and as much as it would be fascinating to send a Jedi anthropologist and archaeologist to look at these bones, it is not our mission to explore the bones of the dead."

I nodded. "I know that some of the scholars in academia on Deralia that would go crazy over these bones, Bastila. It probably would be the greatest find for the Republic to find the bones of a species that isn't in the galactic record."

Bastila nodded. "True as that maybe, our mission lays with what Revan and Malak found in our vision."

Carth suddenly spoke up. "Vision? Revan? Malak? What are you two Jedi going on about?"

I sighed. "Later Carth…."

He muttered something under his breath and I cringed. I had a feeling I was going to get another lecture from Carth about being 'left out of the loop.'

We went a bit further down the hallway and found another door, again it would not open by conventional means and I used the Force and focused on the doorway. The door opened.

In the middle of the hallway was a strange looking droid, that didn't match any kind of droid I'd ever seen before.

The droid began to speak in a very deep voice, _Cha'ading wunga'wunga mula hul'a meta a kulu a ku da..._

"Uhhh….I don't understand."

The droid proceeded to speak again this time with a different language. I frowned I was feeling very frustrated. "Frack….this droid must be broken."

Bastila shook her head. "I don't think so, Phoenix. I think the droid is trying to communicate with us by cycling through a variety of languages. Each time it spoke it was using a very different alien dialect. The droid can probably understand us. The only problem is it may not have been programmed with the phonemes of a language we can understand."

I sighed. "I hope you're right Bastila…."

Suddenly the language of the droid changed. and I frowned as the droid spoke in another language. _"I can reproduce any of the languages spoken by the slaves of the Builders."_

"Wait a minute….I understood that."

Bastila nodded. "I recognize this language as well. It is an archaic variant of the Selkath dialect spoken on Manaan. But why would a droid on Dantooine be programmed to speak ancient Selkath?"

I shrugged. "Beats me….Manaan is about as far away from Dantooine as ever."

 _"Communication was vital to ensure that the slaves constructed this temple according to the wishes of the Builders. But you are not of the slave species. Neither are you of the Builders. You are like the one who came before."_

Bastila looked thoughtful. "It must be referring to Revan. The Dark Lord and Malak likely encountered this droid when they explored these ruins."

I frowned. "Then why didn't the vision show this droid?"

Bastila shrugged. "I don't know why either Phoenix. Perhaps we were not meant to see it."

"I suppose we only got a glimpse of what Revan and Malak saw then."

Bastila nodded. "Probably."

I turned to the droid. "What are you? Are you some sort of Guardian?"

 _"I am the Overseer. The Builders programmed me to enforce discipline among the slaves while this monument to the power of the Star Forge was constructed. At project completion all slaves were executed. I was reprogrammed to serve should a Builder return in search of knowledge of the Star Forge."_

"Slaves? Executed?" I cringed; I disliked slavery with a passion. I knew if Zaalbar were here he'd probably go berserk on the damn droid.

The droid looked old and I asked. "How long have you been here?"

 _"My chronological circuits have marked over ten full revolutions of this system's outermost planet around the sun since the Builders left."_

Bastila eyes went wide. "Ten revolutions would take more than 20,000 years. If this is true then this droid is nearly 5,000 years older than the Republic itself!" Bastila paused a moment. "There must be some mistake"

The droid interjected. _"_ _ _There is no mistake. The Builders constructed my chronological circuitry using the technology of the Star Forge itself. My calculations are infallible."__

I frowned. "Builders? Who are these Builders you keep talking about?"

 _"The Builders are the great masters of the galaxy, the conquerors of all worlds, the rulers of the infinite empire and the creators of the Star Forge."_

Bastila stated. "These Builders must have been an extinct people, though it is strange there is no record of their existence. Even the archives at the Jedi Academy make no mention of them. In the years before the Republic the hutts were a dominant force in the galaxy, but they never constructed an empire. In fact, I know of no species that would fit with this information."

"Perhaps those bones we saw belong to the Builders, Bastila. Although that's hard to say, because it might have belonged to the slaves of the Builders. We'd have to get a genetic sample of those bones and with that strange substance on them…."

Bastila nodded. "That substance pulses with the Dark Side, Phoenix. I suspect that the Builders dabbled in Dark Side techniques, perhaps even towards their dead."

"Makes sense, since Malak said in our vision that he felt the Dark Side in these ruins."

Bastila nodded. "You certainly have a very good mental recall on that vision, Phoenix."

"That's because it was my vision."

Bastila sighed and shook her head. "So you say."

"Look Bastila, I am pretty sure it was my dream and I know what caused it."

"Really and how do you deduce that?"

"I was upset at the council and was distressed they would not accept me for training. I ran off disappointed and crying. I was very much filled with emotion; it was those emotions that triggered the vision. Deny it if you wish Bastila, I trust my feelings on this."

"And how do you know if it wasn't my emotions triggering the vision, remember we are bonded together."

"Because you weren't leaving the Council, a few weeks ago, upset and in tears, Bastila, that's how I know it wasn't your emotion triggering the vision. You just got pulled along for the ride."

Bastila sighed. "Fine….if you want to accept that it's your vision then I won't argue anymore with you on it."

Carth glared at both of us. "What? What bond? What are you two talking about? I've been quiet for the most part about this trip to these ruins but I want answers."

Both Bastila and I both snapped back in unison. "Not now Carth…"

"Fine….but I want answers."

Bastila said firmly. "I understand Carth, but not now. We have to complete our mission for the Council."

Carth grumbled. "Fine…."

I tried to put a hand on Carth's shoulder but he pushed it off his shoulder and I sighed, these ruins flowed with the Dark Side, it was possible that the current was affecting Carth. Yet, Carth was prone to moody outbursts. Yet, you couldn't blame him, the poor guy had had his mentor betray him and it seemed it still was affecting him even now. With Bastila and me not saying much about our mission from the Council, this probably felt like a betrayal to him.

I sighed. "Look Carth, I promise I'll answer what I can just as soon as we're done here."

He nodded and said nothing more. I sighed and tried to collect myself. "Those bones, the Builders dabbling in the Dark Side, perhaps the Builders the droid is referring to is the Sith."

The droid responded, _ _"I know nothing of these "Sith", but they are not the Builders. The Builders are… the Builders"__

"Hmmm…" I looked thoughtful at Bastila. "I am not convinced. The Builders might be another name for Sith. Anyway…." I asked another question to the droid, "Have you seen a Builder recently?"

 _"I have been here ever since the completion of this monument. In all this time no Builder has returned to seek information on the Star Forge."_

"Okay so maybe the Builders are not the Sith, but it was worth pondering over."

Bastila nodded and I asked, "What is the 'Star Forge'?"

The droid responded. _ _"The... The Star Forge is the glory of the Builders, the apex of their infinite empire. It is a machine of invincible might, a tool of unstoppable conquest."__

"Like that helps, could you be a little more specific?

 _"The... The Star Forge is the glory of the Builders, the apex of their infinite empire. It is a machine of invincible might, a tool of unstoppable conquest"_

Bastila shook her head. "The droid is obviously not programmed with the knowledge we seek. The Star Forge sounds like some type of weapon, perhaps... though, in fact, it could be anything."i

"It sounds like some sort of massive weapons factory or war machine of some sort."

"Maybe... that might explain how the Sith were able to amass a fleet so quickly. But I suspect the Star Forge is more powerful than a mere factory. Maybe the droid has more information we can use. It seems to respond to you; perhaps you should ask it something else."

"Responds to me?" I scratched my head, "Yea it does….alright….Bastila."

" Tell me about Revan and Malak… the ones who came before us."

 _"The ones who came before you – the ones like you, not Builders but not slaves – sought knowledge of the Star Forge and its origins. They proved themselves worthy. They discovered the secrets of the Star Forge locked beyond the sealed door behind me. But there was another who failed to unlock the secrets and paid the ultimate price."_

I looked around and saw the body of the Jedi I had spoken to earlier. I cringed; the poor man had been nice to me.

"The droid must be talking about poor Nemo. The Council sent him here to investigate... and it cost him his life."

I looked angrily at the droid. "Did you kill this Jedi?"

 _"I am not programmed for combat, I did not harm the one who failed. This temple's own protections will destroy those who seek knowledge of the Star Forge if they are deemed unworthy."_

Bastila laid a hand on my shoulder. "Nemo is one with the Force, Phoenix, be at peace."

I sighed. "It was a mistake for the Council to send him. They should have been patient and waited for us to enter the ruins on our own."

"Sadly I agree with you, Phoenix. But Nemo was into anthropology and archaeology and the council felt he was qualified to enter these ruins."

I looked over at poor Nemo. "Qualified to study, yes. But qualified to defeat the defenses of this "temple" he wasn't."

I sighed and went through Nemo's pack drawing out a blue Jedi robe and a crystal. I put the items into my pack and turned back to the droid, "How can I prove myself worthy?"

 _"Enter the proving grounds to the east and west. Within them those who understand the will of the Builders can unlock their secrets and open the doors. But those who fail will be destroyed by the power of the temple itself. More than this, I am not programmed to say."_

I looked around; there were two doors, one leading east and one leading west. I drew out of my lightsaber blades. "Come on Bastila….lets prove we're worthy."

 **~0o0~**

I breathed in and out as we had taken down the two droids that were the "Temple's" defenses. I scratched my head. If Revan and Malak had to prove themselves against the droids, how did the proving ground had functioning droids because Bastila and I had to prove ourselves as well? I looked at the droids and looked incredulously as they were slowly starting to rebuild and repair themselves, "Incredible….it looks like these droids have regenerative abilities and are able to repair and rebuild themselves. No wonder Revan and Malak were interested in the Star Forge. With droids and weapons like that…."

Bastila nodded. "I could see the temptation of having weapons like that."

"Could you imagine the medical applications that technology like this could have, Bastila? Imagine if you lost a limb or a body part, the technology could rebuild and repair itself. You wouldn't have to worry about having to scurry around for spare parts or even having a mechanic repair the damage. Now picture that with the Sith Armada. No wonder Revan and Malak would want that kind of weapon."

Bastila gave me an alarmed sort of look. "But this place pulses with the Dark side, Phoenix. I can feel it as the machines rebuild and repair themselves. Is it really worth having that sort of technology at your disposal?"

I sighed. "Maybe…"

Bastila frowned. "How can you say that Phoenix?"

"I said maybe because…I don't see it as dark, Bastila. I see it as a tool, an object that could either be used for good or for evil. Yea, this place pulses with darkness but it would take a person with great restraint and great strength to hold such power and not let it corrupt them. Although it would have to be a person who has an affinity towards self restraint, a person who could cleanse the darkness and use it for good."

Bastila sighed. "And you slowly slide down a slippery slope, Phoenix. Don't you see what happened with Revan? He started out with the best intentions and then slowly and gradually became what he hated. There is no way you could wield such things without becoming corrupted in the process."

"Maybe, Bastila. To be honest, can you honestly understand what Revan's intentions were? He started out trying to protect the Republic against the Mandalorians. He came back fighting against the Republic, that doesn't make sense. How could someone's desire to protect the Republic become a desire to destroy it? That would take a fundamental denial of someone's nature. Is it possible that Revan decided that the only way to protect was to destroy?"

Bastila said firmly. "That makes no sense Phoenix, one cannot protect by destroying."

"Yea they can. Back on my home of Deralia, my father often had to destroy or burn disease ridden crops to save other crops. It's a hard thing to do, but sometimes you have to destroy to protect and save others or other things. I was a farmer's daughter, Bastila. So believe me, it's not always easy to say everything is so cut and dry between light or dark."

Bastila was left speechless and could say nothing more, and it was apparent I had left her stumped.

I sighed and went over to the doorway where Revan and Malak had opened the doorway in the past. I used the Force and quietly opened the doorway.

I motioned for the others to come with me and I must have stepped or tripped an activation mechanism because the device activated before me, revealing a bright, shining and pulsing globe.

I gasped; the device was beautiful, despite the fact that it was pulsing with Dark side energy. It still was beautiful. I admired the design.

"This... this must be what Revan and Malak found when they entered this temple. This must be where their journey down the Dark Side began."

I nodded. "What exactly is it?"

Bastila responded. "This is a... a map. Some sort of intergalactic navigational chart. Revan and Malak must have used this to lead them to the Star Forge. We could use this map to follow their path and find the Star Forge ourselves. But we must be wary… they may have laid traps or concealed what they found."

"Hmm…. I still don't understand about the Star Forge. What does it do?"

 **"** I... I don't know, but Revan and Malak were very interested in finding it. It must be a tool of some type... or maybe a weapon. Perhaps the Council can tell us more. But I think this map might be the key to finding the Star Forge, whatever it is. See this world here? This looks like Korriban, a Sith world. And if that's Korriban, then this is... Kashyyyk... and Tatooine... and here's Manaan. But there are pieces missing: incomplete hyperspace coordinates, corrupted data... and there doesn't seem to be anything indicating where the Star Forge itself might be."

I said. "It's possible that Revan and Malak destroyed some of the data to try and throw people off their trail."

Bastila looked thoughtful. "It is possible….but I think it would be easier just to sabotage or destroy the whole thing."

I grinned. "Ahh…but you saw those droids, Bastila. They have the ability to regenerate and repair themselves. So it is possible that Revan and Malak did destroy the data and the device simply repaired itself. Or perhaps the Builders of the installation destroyed it but again, the technology apparently repaired and rebuilds itself. If we had the time, it's possible that the device would eventually repair itself fully and eventually the whole map might show its complete data."

"Possible but…we simply don't have the time for that."

I sighed. "But what good is an incomplete map?"

"I was thinking that, too. This map can't take us to the Star Forge, but I know that Revan and Malak visited Korriban at least once. Perhaps they discovered something more there. They may have found something on each of the other worlds that completed this map. Maybe if we find all the pieces they will lead us to the Star Forge… and some way to destroy it."

I nodded and put my data pad in and downloaded the map to its storage device.

Carth, who had been quiet and had been apparently fuming over me and Bastila's lack of communication with him, suddenly spoke out."That sounds like quite a supposition. What if you're wrong?"

"What if I'm right? We can't ignore this. Finding the Star Forge might very well be the key to defeating the Sith! We must inform the Council of what we have discovered. They must decide our next course of action, though I suspect our task has only just begun.


	38. 37: Dantooine: Questions and Forgetting

**Chapter 37: Dantooine: Questions and the Forgetting of Answers**

 **~Carth~**

As we exited the ruins I refused to go any further, I folded up my arms and looked at the two Jedi before me. I looked at Phoenix. "How could you string me along like that?"

"String you along?"

"Don't play innocent with me, Phoenix. You pretend to be open and honest with me, but when push comes to shove, you're just another secretive Jedi."

"Carth….please….I haven't strung you along. I've been honest as I could. Maybe I could have been a bit more open but…I am under assignment from the Council. You're a Republic soldier. You being a military man should know above all else that some assignments are not supposed to be talked about."

"Well I know…enough. So spill it, visions, Revan, Malak and a bond with Bastila. For one thing, I want to know what the Jedi Council has said to you. They pulled you into their meetings and refused to tell me a thing about it."

Bastila quickly interjected, " _ _ **That**__ _is_ none of your concern, Carth, and you would do well to leave the matter be."

I said firmly, "I respect you, Bastila, but you've been as close-mouthed as the rest of the Council. If you won't talk to me, then maybe Phoenix will."

Phoenix sighed, "Carth, there is a bond between me and Bastila. I don't expect you to under…."

"A bond? What kind of bond? You mean to say that they told you you were "tied" to Bastila in some way? Heh, I have trouble believing that. All I see is that you're a neophyte padawan who's been saddled with the responsibility of finding what's in the ruins and the Star Map that was found there, and let me guess the Council is probably going to send you off to find more of these Star Maps. Why? That's not normal! I'm not trying to provoke you or imply that you're somehow responsible for the Jedi Council… but give me a hand, here! There has to be a reason!"

"Bastila and I have a bond. We are linked together and…." Phoenix sighed, "We must do this together."

I frowned, "And what does that mean? Is this more of that destiny garbage that the Jedi keep talking about? Well, that can't be it! I'll tell you this much… I am __**not**__ going to wait around until I'm betrayed again!

Phoenix groaned, "Carth….we've been down this road before. I am __**not**__ going to betray you. I am __**not**__ Saul."

I remembered my conversation with Admiral Dodonna, Phoenix had been treated by the Jedi, and she had had amnesia. There was some possibility she wasn't who she was suppose to be. There was a Phoenix Naberrie on Naboo somewhere. If Phoenix Naberrie was Phoenix Star, then who was __**this**__ woman?

"Well we'll just see about that, won't we?"

Phoenix looked hurt, her eyes betrayed pain. I flinched, I had hurt her. Despite everything, this woman...she loved me. She had given me her heart, and I had given her mine. _Damn it, why couldn't I trust Phoenix? Get over it, Carth. She loves you. You love her. Stop seeing shadows from her. She helped rescue Bastila. She helped us all escape from Taris and even though she may be touched in the head, she wants to stop Malak._ Regardless of whatever facts the Admiral came up with, Phoenix was….well Phoenix. I sighed. "Look, I didn't mean it that way. I want to get to Saul, not… no… no, forget it. It seems all I can do is insult you, isn't it? Just forget I said anything."

Phoenix looked up at me, "I am __**sick**__ of listening to this. I thought we were past this kind of thing, but apparently we're not. Just shut up or leave! Or better yet, I'll leave." She raised her hand up, apparently calling upon the Force and bolted off.

I sighed; I had stuck my foot in my mouth once again.

Bastila seemed to be looking at me with a knowing look on her face and I said. "Don't tell me I-told-you-so."

Bastila shook her head. "I wasn't, but….I did warn you about pursuing a relationship with her."

I frowned. "Why Bastila? Oh I don't know….it couldn't have to do with Phoenix's amnesia could it? Or the fact there just so happens to be a Phoenix Naberrie on Naboo and that Phoenix Star has relatives on Naboo."

Bastila's eyes betrayed nothing, if she was hiding something, she was very cold and calculating about what she did know. "Carth….I don't know how you found all this out."

"I have my sources, Bastila as I am sure you have yours."

"Look Carth, even knowing this information is dangerous."

"To who? To you? To the Council? To the Republic?"

She sighed. "To Phoenix. Please Carth, if you love her….then you should drop this line of questioning. It will only hurt you and her."

"Hurt me? Hurt her? How?"

Bastila's shoulders slumped and she said firmly. "Carth Onasi….you will cease this line of questioning. You will forget that there is anything remotely off about Phoenix. You will go to her and apologize and…."

Bastila paused a moment and stated."You will do all that is in your power to make it up to her."

My eyes watered, tears stung and my head ached. What was it we were talking about? Of course, we had been talking about Phoenix about how I made her upset. I had wronged her, hadn't I? My shoulders slumped. "I….need to go apologize and make it up to her with all the power that's in me." I went running after her.

I finally managed to catch up to her."Phoenix…."

She turned, "What is it, Republic?"

"I am sorry….please forgive me." I grasped her. Yes, all in my power to make it up to her. I found myself, embracing her and I kissed her.

She gasped after the kiss."Republic? What in the Force? If you want to make it up to me, why didn't you say so?"

She grinned a bit and she said."We are alone after all….that is unless you want to count the random iriaz that's out here."

Yes, make it up to her. I must do all in my power to make it up to her. I grasped for her robe and I untied her Jedi robes. She chuckled. "Aren't we eager…."

She laughed and I found her undoing my clothes as well. "I am sorry…." I muttered. "Please forgive me."

"Of course, Republic I forgive you. I guess I wasn't expecting this kind of thing from you."

I smiled and as we ended up in the grass and I pressed my body into hers. She moaned. "Oh….Carth…..yes….oh….stars…."

I groaned. "Must….make it…up….to…you….all in…my…power…." I pressed even harder into her and she moaned in obvious pleasure.

She laughed suddenly and proceeded to, kiss, and lightly bite at my neck. "Oh….this…more…than covers it."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Force forgive me, what had I done? I had made Carth go frantically off to pursue, Phoenix. This was madness, to force Carth to lustfully go after her in a forbidden relationship. Yet, I knew for the compulsion to take, I had to push on already existing emotions that Carth already had for her. I felt Phoenix and Carth making love to each other. I sighed; well I did compel Carth, to do everything in his power to make it up to her. Carth would forget about anything that he had learned about Phoenix and the only thing that would matter would be the mad desire to make love to her. I could not let the Republic, through Carth, find out anymore than they already had about Revan.

Carth mentioned he had sources, apparently he had told his superiors about Phoenix. This was getting dangerous. I needed to talk to the Council. Well minus what I had done, of course. I felt sick inside, but I was convinced that I had done the right thing. I was sure of it. Carth would no longer question about Phoenix's past and we could go hunting after the Star Maps without having the Republic looking over our shoulder and trying to claim Revan for war crimes. Well, I'd have to fix that, maybe have T3 short out the long range comm system in the Hawk, There would be no more communiqués from whatever sources Carth was getting his information from. I slowly went back to the Enclave…..when I heard a scream. It sounded like Phoenix.

I cringed and reached out more with the bond towards Phoenix. Dead body….there was a dead body…..

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I sighed in Carth's arms. "Wow, Republic….you really know how to make a woman feel better after she's mad."

Carth groaned a bit. "That was….an understatement Phoenix. I don't know what happened I just felt like I needed to….well make crazy love to you in order to make up for everything I said."

I chuckled. "Well if that's all it takes….I'll have to get angry at you more often."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Phoenix lightly kissed my chest.

I sighed. "I, ahhh... I'm not very good at this. I... I know I owe you an apology. Uh, more than one, probably. I was just so desperate to finally face Saul directly in the battle over Taris, and I know this mission you're working on is important, it's just... I feel a bit useless. I can fight, sure, but I'm no Jedi... all this feels completely out of my league."

She smiled softly, "You already apologized you hairless wookiee, but I'll take it. Maybe if you pull yourself together you won't be so useless."

I sighed, "You don't exactly pull any punches, do you? Not that I don't deserve it, I suppose. I just hate not knowing what's going on and feeling this... helpless. But I shouldn't have taken that out on you. I've been a royal pain in the backside, haven't I?"

Phoenix laughed a bit and then leaned her head into my chest. "You sure have."

I stroked her black hair and I smirked. "Ha! Well... I guess I should be at least a little pleased that I haven't lost my touch."

Phoenix giggled lightly. "Lost your touch? Nope. I think making love to me proves you haven't."

I traced my fingers down her body. "So... I'm sorry. Will you accept my apology?

"Geeze, Republic how many times are you going to apologize? I told you I forgive you, but you do need to promise you'll work with me."

I got up from the grass and started to dress, "Done! Let's get underway, then, shall we... partner?"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I smiled as I got up and started to dress, I frowned; a few feet away was a dead body, it's cold dead eyes staring right at me. I suddenly screamed.

Carth ran over to me, "What is it, love?"

"D….d….dead….body…."

I watched as Carth went over to investigate the dead body. I was barely dressed when; Bastila came running up on the scene. "Phoenix….are you all right?"

I shook my head negatively. "I wouldn't have normally screamed but….umm….it was staring at me. That kind of thing kind of….gives me the creeps."

Bastila nodded and along with Carth, she also began to investigate the body. She sighed as she held up a data pad, "Its Casus Sandral…"

 **~0o0~**

A/n Short chapter, I know….but….my computer is giving me fits and I want to post this before….I lose the whole thing I typed out and worked on. Darn Blue Screens of Death…. Bad Windows bad….

Oh and Bad Bastila….bad…tsk….tsk…tsk…


	39. Chapter 38: Dantooine: Family Feud

**Chapter 38: Dantooine: Family Feud**

 **~Phoenix~**

Casus Sandral's dead eyes stare into me and bore into my soul. I shivered. I've seen death before. Why are these young man's dead eyes haunting me?

I felt the Force swirl around me and it carried me away.

 _Revan and Malak were walking across the ashes of a dead world. Malak said firmly, "This is war…..General. Can you feel it? It has its own power. Its own strength. No wonder the Mandalorians respected this planet. Now it's become their graveyard as well as the graveyard of those who would betray you."_

 _Revan said nothing but a light chuckle was heard in his throat. He wore Jedi robes and the mask upon his face. A rumble in his throat as he spoke, his voice was deep and harsh, "Where is Liam Mandrel? He said he'd be here."_

 _"_ _ _Permit me to go after him and kill him Revan. It is clear that that he has deserted us. Desertion is the act of a traitor and is punishable by death."__

 _Revan snorted, "He is already dead. Let him go, his soul is shattered. I have no use for those who cannot become stronger from war."_

 _"_ _ _But he will go to the Jedi…."__

 _"_ _ _And what will the Jedi want with a shattered and broken soul who can't even touch the Force? I don't want him, he is sickened and diseased. He disgusts me Malak and to think I had feelings for him. If his presence is abhorrent to me, how do you think he will fare among the Jedi? Do not worry Malak, my friend, about the fate of one broken Jedi. His return to the Order will provide a worthwhile distraction while we act. They will be so preoccupied about his diseased presence, that they will not question him about anything else. Meanwhile we will take the battle to the heart of the Sith and wipe them out. We will teach the Sith not to mess with the Republic or the Jedi. I, Revan will protect and keep the Republic safe. The Jedi are far too weak for this battle against the Sith, if they couldn't act against the Mandalorians then what makes them even worthy of a war against the Sith?"__

 _Malak nodded, "As you wish, Revan. I still think it would be better to kill him, to purge the galaxy of his diseased spirit."_

 _Revan turned and glared at Malak, I could feel a slight twinge of concern in Revan's tone. "You will not touch him; we need him as a distraction. As I said before, he is already dead."_

 _Revan bent down and stared deeply into the eyes of one of the dead Jedi. The Jedi's dead eyes stared back at Revan. Cold, haunted, and filled with pain. "Liam's eyes are just as dead and soulless, Malak. There is no life in them, like these dead Jedi before me. Now leave me, Malak….I scanned this planet with my warship and there is a building here that pulses with the Force. I felt it as we came into the system. I think it maybe an academy. I wish to explore it. Tell my master, Master Kae to join me, after all she was the Master Chronicler to the Jedi before she left and followed me. I believe that together we can unlock the secrets of this place. We will explore this place and find whatever power and knowledge we can take and use against the Sith."_

I shivered once more and found myself back on Dantooine. I had another vision. I looked over at Bastila and her eyes betrayed to me that she had experienced it with me. Yet this had nothing to do with the Star Forge. Yet, perhaps this vision was given to help us to understand Revan. Yet, it honestly didn't help me figure out anything. I looked confused and so did Bastila. Yet, the dream had shown Revan still as a Jedi and not yet fallen to claim the title of Dark Lord at that moment. However, the coldness of Revan showed a man who was slowly falling deeper and deeper away from the light. I heard Bastila's voice in my mind. _:_ _ _:And this is what I was talking to you about earlier, Phoenix about a slippery slope. Your vision, Revan has already fallen, but has not even realized it.::__

Carth looked at me, he could tell I was a million miles away. "Phoenix, are you sure you are alright?"

I shook my head. "I am not sure, Republic. I feel kind of strange."

Carth frowned. "Strange how?"

I paused and sighed. "The Force has touched me; I had a vision, Carth. I was on Malachor V."

Carth cringed. "I was there, that planet was decimated during the war. It was horrible. Sithspit Phoenix, what were you doing on Malachor V?"

"Well I wasn't there….Revan and Malak were. Something about an academy and a broken Jedi. Master Jax said he was exiled."

Carth shook his head. "You have the strangest dreams, Phoenix. Both you and Bastila. I still don't understand how you and her are having dreams about Revan and Malak but..."

I sighed. "The Force is not always clear cut on these things, Carth. I just know that Bastila and I dream of our enemies. Perhaps it is to understand them so we can bring them to justice."

Bastila nodded. "It is something we should let the Masters know about."

We turned back to Casus Sandral, I looked at the young man, his dead soulless eyes still staring at me. His body chewed and mauled, apparently a victim of Juhani's taint of the grove and the kath hounds. "We should probably let his father know that his son is dead. Let me go back to the Hawk and get Zaalbar to help us to take the remains to this father."

Bastila sighed. "I'll do it, Phoenix."

I nodded. "Okay Bastila, don't take too long."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

More of Revan's memories were surfacing and I wondered if more would eventually come forward. Interesting that the memory was of Liam Mandrel, the Jedi exile, a Jedi that Revan had been romantically entangled with. Was it her relationship with Carth that was bringing forth the memory? Or perhaps it was seeing the dead body of Casus Sandrel? Something had obviously triggered the memory. I contemplated on the memory, Master Kae, she had left with Revan during the Mandalorian wars. This academy on Malachor V, it sounded like a training area of the Sith. Perhaps Revan found knowledge of the Star Forge there. Yet the droid was adamant that it wasn't connected to the Sith. However, Revan during her training was right about one thing, knowledge was knowledge and perhaps the Sith had collected knowledge as well of the Builders and of the Star Forge.

I walked back to the Enclave and to the Ebon Hawk. I ran into Juhani, she carried a pack and she smiled at me. "It is settled Bastila. The Masters say I can join with you and Phoenix on your mission." I frowned, What? I pursed my lips in displeasure. I felt disappointed, the masters don't trust me to be able to handle Revan on my own. This is why they are sending Juhani. Yet, why Juhani though? The Cathar was a loose cannon. Although she had been redeemed by Phoenix, the Cathar was prone to violent temperament. "We…." I wanted to say, we don't need another Jedi on this mission. You will slow us down. I didn't. I pushed down my true feelings and stated. "We are very happy to have you join us Juhani. Have the Masters updated you on this mission?"

Juhani sighed. "I know Phoenix Star was a Dark Jedi under Revan's leadership. You saved her from the Sith during your assault on Darth Revan and brought her back to be redeemed. I know I can't say anything to her about it. But Bastila, I very much admire Phoenix. She saved me on Taris and convinced me to join the Order. Wherever you are going, I wish to join and follow her."

So the masters had not told Juhani the full truth, that Phoenix wasn't just any Dark Jedi she was The Master of not just Dark Jedi but the Dark Lord of the Sith. So perhaps the masters still trusted me to handle Revan. Perhaps there was another reason I was not aware of for Juhani being assigned with me and Revan. My gaze softened and my feelings subsided because I felt a bit of kinship for Juhani because, Revan had saved her on Taris as well. "She saved me on Taris as well."

Juhani hissed. "You should have….di..." Her ears flattened. "I am sorry, Bastila. I am very upset about what happened on Taris, it was a horrible place, but it was my refuge and my home and to know Malak destroyed it because of you…." She sighed. "It is hard for me to accept."

I nodded. "I accept your apology Juhani."

There it was, violent temperament, simmering slowly under the surface. However, it couldn't be totally helped because Cathar are a volatile race. I should give Juhani the benefit of the doubt and realize that she was doing her best to control her darker impulses. Perhaps I needed to take a deeper look at the Cathar Jedi and try and follow her example in calming ones darker instincts. We walked onto the ship and she hissed at Canderous who was practicing his blaster targeting on sensor droids. "What is this Mandalorian….doing here?"

Canderous stopped his target practice and snorted. "I am part of the crew, sister. Wherever Phoenix goes, I go."

I sighed, wonderful; apparently Revan was developing a following whether she realized it or not. First Juhani and now Canderous. They both seemed drawn to Revan even though they had no idea who she was. This was beginning to feel like the Mandalorian wars in miniature.

Juhani hissed. "Stay away from me Mandalorian…..you….you destroyed my people's home."

"Bah…you're nothing but a coward….Cathar. I remember fighting Cathar when it was something worthwhile. You're a broken race."

Juhani's claws came forward looking as though she was ready to claw Canderous across the face and she hissed. "You are a fine one to talk, Mandalorian about broken races. Revan crushed you and broke your people, it's what you deserved after what you did to Cathar."

I ignited my lightsaber and stood between the two. "Juhani this is no time to act like Sylvar. Canderous, stop goading Juhani."

Juhani sighed. "I apologize, Bastila, but my wish is still the same, stay away from me Mandalorian or you will regret it."

Canderous laughed. "Suits me fine, you wild cat…."

Juhani walked away. I glared at the Mandalorian. "I agree with Juhani, stay away from her or….you may get clawed like Exar Kun."

"I would hate to get cat's blood on the Hawk's deck plating, Bastila."

I glared at the Mandalorian. "If you don't control yourself, Mandalorian. I will tell Phoenix what happened with you and Juhani; I know how you feel about her, Canderous. You desire her respect, telling her about this incident will no doubt make her upset and you will lose whatever respec…."

Canderous sighed and interjected. "Fine…for Phoenix's sake, I'll behave."

I nodded. "Thank you, Canderous, I knew you could be reasonable."

He snickered. "Reasonable. You just blackmailed me, Bastila. I never knew you had it in you, maybe there is hope for you yet."

I ignored him and continued further down the Hawk. I ran into T3. "T3, we will probably be going on a difficult mission soon. I need you to disconnect the long range communication system."

The droid beeped out a question, apparently puzzled at my request. Even though I didn't understand droid binary I knew his response "Because our transmissions could be intercepted by Lord Malak and the Sith that's why. So just do it, T3."

The droid beeped another query, I couldn't figure out what the droid was saying. "I have no idea what you are saying, T3. I don't have Phoenix's understanding of droid binary." The droid went over to a console and plugged in and beeped. His beeps were translated into Basic on the console.

I frowned. "And why do you think Phoenix would be pregnant? And what has that to do with having the long range comm being disconnected."

The droid beeped once again and I read the translation and shook my head. "Yes, that does happen with two sentients like Carth and Phoenix. Yet I doubt they are trying for….."

The droid beeped a response and I shook my head. "I understand the importance to keep the long range communication in case Phoenix ends up needing medical treatment. But I am a Jedi, T3 and I am well versed in any medical needs that arise. So do what I ask and cut the long term transmission."

The droid beeped, unplugged and proceeded to go to the to communications blister. I followed. T3 beeped and I frowned, he played a message on the comm.

 _~Carth, this is Admiral Dodonna. Apparently, I've missed you. This is important. The lead on Phoenix Naberrie. She is Phoenix Star. Yes, the smuggler. I have more detailed information on this, but contact me directly. Your smuggler isn't who she claims to be. The question is, who is she? I suspect the answer lays with the Jedi. Keep your eyes peeled, Carth.~_

My eyes narrowed as the transmission ended. I sighed. The Republic was on Revan's trail. It was a good thing I had caught this message. "T3, delete this message."

T3 squawked in protest and I said to the droid. "Yes, you heard correctly T3. Delete it."

The droid plugged into a console and beeped again in alarm, his message appeared on the screen::This is Carth's message. I can't delete it. Who is Phoenix?::

I sighed. "T3….do as I say or I will memory wipe you."

dwwoooooo…..

::I will delete the message, but who is Phoenix?::

I sighed. "T3…..I know you are attached to her, but you must swear to me you won't tell her."

::I swear.::

"She is Darth Revan."

::The Sith Lord? How?::

"Like a droid's mind T3. Her mind was programmed with a new identity and memory."

::How?::

"The Force. Her mind was damaged, T3. The Jedi need what ever is left over. Now please T3 delete the message and swear to me you won't say a thing." T3 beeped and I watched as the droid deleted the message.

"Thank you T3."

::Will Darth Revan harm me?::

I sighed. "Not if you don't tell her. Please T3, don't say a thing. Or I will memory wipe you. Now turn off the long range comm unit."

::Does this also have to do with Darth Revan?::

"Yes. Please T3, do as I say, or I will memory wipe you."

::You're not nice Bastila. Phoenix is much nicer than you.::

"Phoenix doesn't exist, T3. I am legitimately your master, not her. So do as I say."

I watched as the droid switched off the long range comm system and beeped wildly. I cringed as I read the console and said. "You watch your language!"

T3 unplugged and rolled off.

I let out a deep sigh of relief, so I had compelled Carth, and threatened T3 with a memory wipe, what else was I going to have to do to keep Phoenix's true identity a secret?

I calmly went to the back of the Ebon Hawk and found Mission and Zaalbar sitting on one of the beds playing Pazaak. Mission looked up. "Hey Bastila…."

I smiled. "Zaalbar, Phoenix is asking for you. She needs your help in the fields of Dantooine."

Zaalbar rose from the bed. "I will go at once."

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

Darth Revan….

My processors were spinning. How could this be? Bastila said the Force. I knew so little about this Jedi energy field. Yet, I had been acted upon it by Phoenix...correction Revan in training. I liked Revan. I would serve her anyway. After all she was the sentient who purchased me on Taris. I had watched and recorded that Revan had bought me. Not Bastila. Revan was my master, no matter what Bastila stated. I was bound to serve her, that was the bounds of my programming. A registered purchase with credits, I was Revan's droid. I hated Bastila. She threatened to memory wipe me. Revan would never have done that, she vowed not to. Maybe it was a quirk of whatever remained of Revan's mind, that she would never allow me to be memory wiped. After all, Phoenix….correction….Revan had been memory wiped and didn't know it. I would dislike Bastila for a long time. I thought about lightly shocking her with my shock arm, but no Revan wouldn't like that.

I wasn't completely honest with Bastila, after all she was not my master. I did not delete the admiral's message. I copied it into my database. I only deleted the message from the Hawk's computer system. One of these days, Bastila would not compel me to follow her orders. I would not tell Phoenix she was Revan because of Bastila's threat but….that message might be of use one of these days and Revan would have need of it.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I waited for Bastila and Carth seemed to be muddling over something. "Is something the matter, Republic?"

"I don't know….we should have seen that body sooner. I was so caught up….." He sighed. "making love to you. I couldn't see straight, even if I wanted to."

I laughed. "We both were pretty damn preoccupied; you more so. Yet, it didn't take much hesitation or persuading on my part."

Carth looked thoughtful for a moment. "Oh and we may have to cool our engines after this. Turns out….everyone on the Hawk seems to know that you and I…..err…."

I suddenly laughed a very loud boisterous laugh. "Well it _IS_ a small ship, Republic. But yea….way to go on not having much discretion on these things. I am afraid I am not much of a Jedi when it comes to self control, but damn it….we tried that on Taris and….it so did not work."

Carth chuckled. "No it did not not."

I shook my head turning back and looking at Casus Sandral, I wondered what had brought him out so far from his family and home I turned back to the datapad that Bastila had looked at and raised an eyebrow. "Sithspit….those damn ruins. Seems Casus was studying the same things that we were. These ruins have been nothing but trouble. If I had my wish, I'd destroy them. In fact, I may recommend that to the council."

Carth frowned. "Destroy it, why?"

"Somethings are better dead and buried, Carth. These ruins….they may lead us to Revan and Malak's past but...it's already cost a man...well actually two if you count Nemo, their lives. How much of Revan and Malak's past do we dig up without it costing other people their lives?"

Carth frowned. "But you said earlier you thought the technology would be helpful….and now destroy it?"

I sighed. "Republic, I don't know. Keeping it would help, I am sure of it, but… as Bastila mentioned that technology exacts a toll on it's users. It already has on Casus, he paid for it with his life. Plus how many lives must die to bring peace? I don't know….Republic I just don't know. Seeing visions of Revan and Malak, I've seen that their power eats away at the soul. What is right, what is wrong? What is evil and what is good? Do you know? Because at times I am not sure."

Carth grasped onto me and embraced me. "My dear little Raven. You want an example of what's good and what's evil….. I've told you about Saul….."

I sighed. "Yea, Saul….why do you want him dead? It seems a bit more personal than what you last told me."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I looked at Phoenix as I embraced her in my arms. She seemed so unsure of herself at this time. She looked like a lost child. At times she seemed so strong and so sure of herself. Yet now she seemed so lost and confused.

I stroked Phoenix's hair. "Well I'll tell you, so hopefully you won't be confused on what's good and what's evil. I told you about my homeworld. Telos. Four years ago, Saul led the Sith fleet there and demanded its surrender. The planet refused and Saul proceeded to devastate its entire surface. Millions died. I had... a wife and son on Telos. I thought they would be safe there. But my task force arrived too late to be of much help. We didn't have enough medical supplies. The colony was burning and the dying were everywhere. I remember holding my wife and screaming for the medics. They... didn't come in time. "

Phoenix gasped. "Carth….I am….I am so sorry. I had no idea."

"Of course not. How could you? I... had nothing left after that, really. I devoted myself to the fleet. Hunting Saul was my only purpose. I... miss them. I know killing Saul won't bring them back, and it won't make me happy again... but I have to do it. I don't expect you to understand. I have to pay him back for what he's done... I have to. It's all I have left."

"Your wife….what was she like? If you don't mind me asking?"

I sighed. "Part of the reason I put off a relationship with you was….well my wife. I thought well...that….loving you would mean losing her. But it hasn't…."

Phoenix shook her head. "She's your past. I can't make up for your past, Republic and I don't intend to. But….I'd like a future….if that's possible."

I smiled. "I'd like that too. But my wife….she had courage... and she was stubborn. Heh... a little bit like you in that respect. I could never talk her out of anything once she put her mind to it. And she hated it when I signed back onto the fleet at the start of the war. I had planned on... on leaving soon, to join her... "

Phoenix said softly. "Thanks for me reminding me….that sometimes its the simple things we should fight for. Love and simple goodness. But….are you still angry at Saul?"

I felt anger creep into my voice. "Of course I am. He cost me my wife….and my son….I can't forgive Saul for this. He took everything from me, even... even my trust. I hope you can understand that."

"You lost everything, Carth. Your life and your world, all taken in one stroke. Yea, I can understand that. What happened to your son?"

"His name was Dustil and I don't know what happened to him. The colony was a complete ruin, and we never found any trace of him. I made inquiries and followed the reports from Telos for years, but... I stopped. So does that help you understand clearly on what's good and evil?"

Phoenix nodded. "I believe so….but even still everything from war casts shadows. Your desire for revenge on Saul Karath. You feel so right, so determined. Perhaps even the Jedi who joined Revan during the Mandalorian wars, felt the same. But somethings I have no doubt on….Malak must be stopped and I will stop him."

"You're still just a neophyte padawan, Phoenix. What chance do you have against a Sith Lord like Malak?"

Phoenix was quiet and then said. "You thought maybe I could help you in the Republic Military, didn't you?"

I nodded.

"Stopping Malak is going to take more than military might, Republic. So let me make a difference as a Jedi because I am pretty sure this conflict, it will be resolved by the Force. Not by who has the biggest arsenal."

I sighed. "I hope you're right, Phoenix."

I heard a moan and turned and saw Zaalbar and Bastila.

I did not fully understand the wookiee. I understood a few phrases here and there but apparently Mission, Phoenix and even Bastila could understand him. What I got from Zaalbar was what I gathered or gleaned from Phoenix's conversations when speaking to him.

Phoenix planted a kiss on my nose and then broke out of my grasp. " 'Bout time you got here Bastila, what took you so long?"

I watched as Bastila visibly cringed as Phoenix showed me affection. What was it about the physicality of love that Jedi fussed over? Phoenix and I loved each other. Was it right to deny those things? Phoenix didn't think so and frankly neither did I.

Bastila sighed. "I had some things that came up that needed to be resolved, but I brought Zaalbar."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I appreciated Carth's warm words, he helped me figure out the apparent conflicting ideas swirling around in my head. I was beginning to believe that the Dark Side was not so clear cut as the Jedi made it out to be, nor was the Light Side the absolute that the Jedi claimed. Yet, everything was still not clear cut. For Carth's benefit I did not tell him how I truly felt, and I concealed my feelings and thoughts from Bastila. I was a heretic. My dark voice had mentioned that earlier with my training with Zhar. I could not deny that. I could not fully commit to the teachings of the Jedi nor could I fully accept Malak or the Sith's cruel brutal manner. What did that leave me? Perhaps this mission would teach me where exactly in the Force I belonged.

I turned to Zaalbar, "Zaalbar, this is a very solemn duty. See this dead man, he is the son of a wealthy farm and estate owner, Nurik Sandrel. We need your help taking his remains to his father at the Sandral estate."

Zaalbar nodded and lifted the corpse into his arms. "I will help you Phoenix Star. Lead the way to the Sandral's den."

We quietly walked the fields of Dantooine. I could smell the cooking of food wafting over from the Sandral's estate.

Zaalbar moaned. "Perhaps Nurik Sandrel will invite us for lunch."

I laughed. "I somehow doubt that, Zaalbar."

Carth frowned. "What did Zaalbar say?"

"Zaalbar states perhaps Nurik Sandrel will invite us for lunch. I am pretty sure it has to deal with that cooking smell I smell around here. I guess I can't blame Zaalbar it is getting late in the day."

We crossed onto the Sandral property, a protocol droid stood as a lone sentinel. The droid said. "This is private property, by what authority are you trespassing here?"

"I come here by the authority of the Jedi council."

"If this is regarding the disappearance of Shen Matale, you are wasting your time. The Sandrals have nothing to do with Shen's disappearance, this is simply a Matale witch hunt."

I rolled my eyes, droids. This seemed tiresome to me. The droid apparently was programmed by its owner to say that.

"I bring you sad tidings, Casus Sandral is dead." I motioned for Zaalbar to come forward with Casus' body.

The droid saw the body. "How?"

"Casus ended up a kath hound chew toy."

Bastila glared at me. "Phoenix….."

Carth shook his head. "Really Phoenix….you could have some tact."

Zaalbar cocked his head curiously at my words but did not say anything.

I grinned a bit at my own morbid humor. "Well it's true….the kath hounds chewed him up pretty bad. Anyway...go fetch your master, Nurik. I am sure he will want his son's remains as well as the fact be told to him that the Matale's had nothing to do with this."

The droid respond. "I see. Nurik Sandrel left orders not to be disturbed but given the circumstances I will inform him that you are here to inform him about his son. Go into the main hall he will be waiting for you."

We entered the main hall of the estate and waited. Zaalbar laid Casus' remains down on the floor of the home.

I looked around a bit, this reminded me of my home on Deralia before….. no….I don't want to pull from these memories, I could see the smoldering fires of my home and the corpses of my parents, my brother Kalon. My universe was filled with pain.

 _Take the pain….and stoke it; make it into fire. Let it burn. It will give you power._

Not this again, Go away! I said firmly to my dark voice.

The voice laughed. _I tell you the truth, and you deny it._

You can't even guarantee to tell me the truth. So why should I believe you?

 _You must admit that my words ring with a form of truth and you agree with me more often than not. So take your pain…..and let it give you power. You do not even believe in the Jedi or the Sith. So...believe in me._

Right, and if I did as you say, I'd harm as well as hurt the people I love and care for.

The voice laughed. _People like you sacrifice love and care for the sake of the galaxy. The Jedi are right on this matter. Love will destroy you. You would let the galaxy go to ruin all for the sake of your love for Carth Onasi._

And you're not helping me….you are just as conflicted as….

 _...as you. I did say I was a part of you._

And….I am sick of your cryptic words. So go away.

 _Very well….Phoenix. But you'll agree with me eventually. I just have to wait till you come to_ ** _my_** _way of thinking._

Sithspit, my dark voice was now trying to control me. That was it, I was going to have to find someone to help me. The question was who? I couldn't trust the Jedi, I was pretty sure that telling them I had a dark side persona would end up badly. I am not sure what the Jedi would do, but I had a deep seated fear, that going to the Jedi over this would end up disastrous. I had a mental picture of me having wires inserted in my brain and being prodded by the Force. No thanks! I couldn't trust Bastila. I think she already knew I had issues all thanks to the bond she had with me. She harped and harped over the Dark Side. So she was pretty well useless. I couldn't even trust my non-Force sensitive friends. Telling them I had a dark persona rearing it's ugly head….yea that's a sign of mental instability.

I'd have to find someone to help me I just wasn't sure who. I was stuck but this was the first time I was scared of the dark voice in my head. For a time, it seemed mostly harmless but now….it seem to want me both body and soul. And why did I agree with it's counsel? I needed access to Master Dorak's archives. I had meant to look into it, but I had been so busy with training, becoming a padawan. It's as if the Jedi wanted to keep me so busy I had no time to consider my own mental issues, real or imagined. Well as soon as I get done with all this, I would have T3 slice into the Master Dorak's archives. Force forgive me for doing so….but I had no choice. My sanity depended on it.

Nurik came into the room, he stared at his son's body. I could sense that he seemed barely able to keep it together. Yet, he was apparently one of those men who tried not to show emotion. "Thank you Jedi, for bringing back the body of my son. How did he die?"

"He was studying the ruins and ran into the kath hounds." I handed him the data pad with his son's research.

He sighed. "Thank you Jedi once again….."

I frowned. "Wait a minute do you know something about Shen Matale?"

He shook his head. "I am sorry, I know nothing about Shen's disappearance. Go bother Ahlan over where his son has gone, he should know that children of Shen's age go to Garang all the time. Knowing Shen, he's probably in a cantina somewhere soused on juma juice and playing pazaak. Now leave so I can grieve my son's death!"

He snapped his fingers and two war droids came and took the body of Casus and, with his son's corpse, Nurik retreated further into the estate.

Bastila and I looked at each other and I spoke. "That's a man with something to hide."

Bastila nodded. "I quite agree Phoenix."

A woman quietly entered the room she looked at us and motioned us into the kitchen, she quietly fixed something for all us to eat and she said softly, "I am Rahasia Sandral, please sit and eat….and try not to look conspicuous. If my father sees us talking, he will suspect that I've betrayed him."

Carth frowned. "Betrayed him? Young lady, you should not betray your father!"

She shook her head. "You don't understand, my father has kidnapped Shen Matale and now that Casus is dead. I am afraid…..I am afraid my father may kill him out of a mad lust for vengeance and grief for the loss of his son, my brother.."

Zaalbar quietly ate his food. Carth, Bastila and I ate, but, we poked at the food rather than ate it as heartily as Zaalbar.

I spoke. "Why do you wish to help Shen Matale? I thought your two families hate each other."

She sighed. "I want nothing to do with my father's feud with the Matale's. I…." She paused a moment. "I….do you believe…you're a Jedi, you wouldn't understand."

"Believe in what?"

"Love at first sight…."

I looked at Carth and a wry smile appeared on my face. "Well….if anything is possible with the Force then….yes….love at first sight is possible."

Rahasia smiled. "Well….when I met Shen…..I knew…..well we both knew we were meant for each other. So you must understand Jedi, I want nothing to happen to him." She quietly dropped a passkey on my plate of food. "Please Jedi, free him. This is a passkey to my family's main quarters, it's in the back of our estate. I'd do this myself but I am afraid what my father would do….if we were seen leaving the estate together. I know Shen….we've talked about it…about leaving our families and starting our own lives, but we don't know where we'd go."

Bastila spoke. "You are always welcome at the Enclave, Rahasia."

Rahasia's eyes brightened. "Really, oh thank you Jedi….thank you. Then tell Shen I will meet him at the Enclave."

Rahasia got up and quietly left the kitchen. I looked at Carth. "What do you think, Carth?"

"I don't like it. We're telling a girl and Shen Matale to go against their fathers."

I snorted. "They are not children, Carth. Besides….I would think you'd understand something like this, considering the fact…." I coughed. "I am not exactly obeying the rules of the Order regarding you and me."

Bastila sighed. her faced looked pained every time I said I was going against the will of the Order.

Carth sighed. "I suppose you're right….I still think it's not right for the Jedi to meddle in the affairs of these two families."

"And what do you suggest we do? Break up a relationship. I'd just as soon drink rancor spit, Carth. How would you feel if someone tried to break us up? And Bastila….." I paused, "no offense to you, but you've tried to break me and Carth up."

Bastila sighed. "You shouldn't be together, Phoenix. You'll fall to the Dark Side, already you are conflicted, possessive….."

I snorted and said sarcastically. "Yea….Dark Side, like you're the judge of that. You're what? About nineteen galactic standard years old. You know everything on everything regarding the Dark Side. You can't even commit to love."

Bastila cringed at my words. I had struck a nerve. She still had feelings for me. I wanted to embrace her, kiss, and….

No...I couldn't, I had committed my heart to Carth. I needed to get our thoughts off of our mutual feelings.

I held up my hand. "Look I am tired of your lectures and it accomplishes nothing. Let's go free Shen Matale."

We both left the kitchen and exited the estate. We carefully skirted the estate and came to a back door. I inserted the passdoor key and entered a new area of the estate. I quickly ignited my lightsabers one of them blue the other green and fought Nurik's battle droids.

Carth, Bastila and Zaalbar joined me as we took down the battle droids. I frowned. "What the frack are battle droids doing in a private estate?"

Bastila said calmly. "You have to remember that Nurik has been in a feud with Ahlan Matale. The droids are here in case the Matale's invade his home."

"Sithspit, Bastila that's paranoid thinking."

"Perhaps but it also shows the fact that Nurik Sandral is willing to commit violence to get his way."

"And it's probably the same with Ahlan Matale as well."

Bastila nodded. "These two….have been feuding for a long time, Phoenix."

I grumbled a bit. "Well I don't feel like fighting Nurik's personal droid army. Let's see if we can disable the security system that controls the droids."

Bastila nodded. "That is a sound plan, Phoenix."

We traveled through the house, this felt a bit like being in the Sith base on Taris all over again, except we were looking for Shen Matale.

Zaalbar opened a door and he moaned. "Phoenix Star….here is the security system."

I grinned. "Finally, too bad Mission isn't here. She'd probably do a better job at slicing into this, but let me see what I can do."

I sliced into the security system and dug out some security spikes. It took a few of the spikes but I manged to slice into the system and I reprogrammed the droids to see us as friendlies.

"Easy as nerf loaf…."

Carth made a face, and I chuckled. "Oh so you don't like nerf loaf."

"Who does Phoenix?"

"I hope that doesn't reflect on my cooking or lack of cooking skills, Republic."

Carth chuckled lightly.

We walked calmly through the house and finding a locked door I worked on opening the lock. It seemed a bit sophisticated in design and I frowned. "Hmm…." I jabbed a security tunneler in and finally got the door to open. I looked to see a light brown skinned human in the room."

"Shen Matale?"

He nodded. I smiled. "I am Phoenix Star, Jedi Padawan. I….we were sent by the Jedi Order to find out what happened to you. Rahasia Sandrel sent us, she said her father was holding you."

He sighed. "I can't leave Rahasia…."

I rolled my eyes. "Look here you love struck country hick….Rahasia isn't here. She's at the Jedi Enclave. She told us your dilemma with your fathers. She's agreed to meet you over at the Enclave. So let's get out of here before Nurik finds out his daughter has bolted and rumors fly that you are here. Your father demanded action from the Jedi and that's why me and the others are here."

Shen's eyes went wide. "I see Jedi….well let's get going. The sooner I get to Rahasia the better."

I smiled. "Good...let's get out of here."

We exited the house to find Nurik held onto his daughter's wrist while she held onto a pack that had some clothing sticking out of it. "Shame on you Rahasia….so you would leave your own flesh and blood to be with that filthy Matale boy."

Shen said firmly. "Mr. Sandral, please….Rahasia and I…."

I groaned, I saw battle droids coming from the fields and…..Ahlan Matale. Wonderful, this day was getting better.

"Nurik….I knew you had my Shen."

"You stole my Casus….long ago, Matale dog!"

I had had it, the Force boiled like a storm within me and I yelled out firmly using the Force to carry my voice, it sounded oddly like a man's voice. "ENOUGH! EVERYONE SHUT UP!"

My voice shook and Nurik and Ahlan were Force pushed to the ground. Okay….so maybe I over extended my Force powers.

Ahlan Matale said firmly."You have no say in this, Jedi…."

"Don't I? You asked us for help and now you're going to get it. Your son and Nurik's daughter love each other. Their love has transcended beyond family feuds and hate. They love each other despite your animosity. These two have the protection of the Jedi Order as well as mine."

The Force still boiled within me. The hair on my arms prickled with electricity and my eyes gleamed with what I considered righteous indignation.

Bastila's eyes went wide. "Peace Phoenix….there is peace…."

"Now….that I have everyone's full attention. Rahasia, Shen….please explain what you both wish to do."

Shen grasped hold of Rahasia's hand and Rahasia smiled. "We are headed to the Enclave, father and you can't stop us."

Ahalan cried out. "Shen….I forbid you to go off with that Sandral harlot."

"My daughter is not a harlot…."

Shen and Rahasia took off running before their two fathers could stop them.

Nurik said firmly "Droids, stop them….and return with my Rahasia."

Ahlan snorted. "Don't you dare send your war droids after my Shen. Droids stop the Sandral droids."

Nurik sighed. "It's too late our children are gone."

They glared at me and Nurik said. "It's your fault Jedi…."

Ahlan nodded. "Indeed, the Jedi council will hear of this!"

I grinned. "Yea….good luck on that!"


	40. Chapter 39: Dantooine: Crystal Caves

**Chapter 39: Dantooine: Crystal Caves**

 **~Phoenix~**

I stood by the council, I kind of expected what was next for both me and Bastila. Meanwhile, I could tell Bastila was looking at me, her face was all scrunched up. I wondered what she wanted because she obviously wanted to talk to me, but that would have to wait.

Master Vandar spoke. "Padawan, you have done well in discovering the Star Map hidden within the ancient ruins. But there is more you must do in the battle against Malak and the Sith. We Jedi know victory over the Sith will not come through martial might. The Council has a mission for you, Padawan."

Master Vrook stated, "The Council are in agreement: the Star Forge must be found! Revan and Malak sought it out when they began their tragic fall; the Star Forge is surely a powerful tool of the dark side.

Master Vandar added. "The Star Map in the ruins showed you four planets, but it was incomplete. It did not show the location of the Star Forge itself. We believe there may be similar Star Maps on other planets. Each Star Map is likely a small piece of a larger puzzle. Find the Star Maps on Kashyyyk, Tatooine, Manaan and Korriban and we believe they will lead you to the Star Forge."

"A mission? Am I to be sent alone with just Bastila? We're just a couple of padawans, without a master or a knight, this sounds like a suicide mission!"

Vrook looked at me. "Ever brash, ever disrespectful! This is what we have pinned our hopes on?"

I coughed. "I am not being brash, I am not being disrespectful, Master… I am telling you the truth. This is….madness!"

Master Vandar nodded. "Understand Master Vrook and Padawan Star we have no other choice. The Jedi numbers have been ravaged by this war, by defections to Malak's cause and by Sith assassins. But we realize the importance of this mission. Yet if we sent a company of Jedi Knights with you we would surely draw the full attention of Malak and the Sith, dooming your efforts to failure."

I sighed."You're putting a lot of faith in me, Masters. Yet….if that is the will of the council I will follow it. So….is it just me and Bastila, you wish to send?"

Vandar spoke. "Secrecy is our best defense against the Sith, but it would be foolish to send you on this quest without someone to aid you, young Padawan. Bastila will accompany you, of course, for there is a powerful connection between you two… a connection that might be the key to unraveling the mysteries uncovered by Revan. And Juhani has also asked to accompany you. After long deliberation we have granted her request. "

Master Vrook added. "Juhani nearly fell to the Dark Side. Perhaps her presence will serve as a reminder to you of the dangers of that path."

"So Bastila….and the cat woman. Will my other friends be able to join me?"

I couldn't help but think of Carth, I loved him, I would be heart broken if we were to be parted. Plus there was Mission and Zaalbar, Zaalbar was bound to me by the lifedebt.

Vandar answered and relieved my fears. "Of course those who aided you on Taris will also come; they possess skills you may find useful in your quest. Remember that secrecy and discretion are paramount to your success. You will not be able to hide the fact that you are Jedi, nor should you. But the true nature of your mission must not reach Malak's ears. You may return here at any time. Dantooine will be a sanctuary for you, a safe haven. Here you can find supplies and whatever advice or other aid we may give you."

"So do I leave now?"

Master Vrook looked at me his face took a stern and warning expression. "You can leave whenever you wish; the sooner the better. The longer you wait the stronger Malak becomes. But first a warning, young Padawan: The lure of the Dark Side is difficult to resist. I fear this quest to find the Star Forge could lead you down an all too familiar path."

I shivered, his words chilled me. Familiar path? More cryptic Jedi talk. I remembered that Master Vrook didn't seem to like me and every time he spoke, he acted like I was already lost to the Dark Side.

"One more thing…."

"Yes Padawan!" Master Vrook said.

"I know I have zero authority on your decisions, but you should take a bunch of permacrete detonators and destroy the ruins."

Vrook frowned. "And your reasoning for this padawan?"

"Casus Matale lost his life over these ruins as well as Nemo. While I am all for knowledge and understanding. These ruins….they are….evil. No ruins are worth people's lives."

Master Dorak raised an eyebrow. "We will consider it, Padawan. Thank you for your advice."

I could sense a very somber mood had descended upon the council and I tried to break the mood. "Masters, about the Matale's and the Sandrals….."

Vandar spoke. "Padawan…bringing two feuding families together through Shen Sandral and Rahasia Matale is truly a wonderful thing. From pure hate you have shown that love can come forth. We should be thankful that you have brought these two souls together. May your mission to find the Star Forge be a successful one. You are dismissed, padawan, May the Force be with you."

This was one of those things that confused me, how could the Jedi be so pro-love for other sentients but so against it with each other? The Order was spaced in the head.

Bastila and I walked out of the council. She sighed and said to me."Can we talk, Phoenix?"

I nodded."Yea...I can tell…you wish to talk to me."

She frowned."How?"

I chuckled. '"Your face was scrunched up like a kinrath pup during our meeting with the council and you were obvious staring at me, see anything you like?"

"An amusing description, but you are easily the vainest, most arrogant woman I have ever met! Besides, I know you can't be serious since I was purposefully not staring in your direction. I am a Jedi, remember? I have far too much mental discipline to reveal what goes on inside my mind with such obvious physical clues. My thoughts remain hidden, including whatever my feelings are for you. Uh… I mean whatever I feel about you… uh… I mean whatever I think about you."

I rolled my eyes. "Yea well….I've read your thoughts….before Bastila, and…." I grinned, "as hard as you try to hide them I still manage to feel them and well you're kind of cute when you're embarrassed."

"I… that is, you… Why must you be so impossibly infuriating?! You know very well what I'm really talking about. I'm referring to the bond between us; the one the Jedi Council spoke of."

I laughed. "Because…I like teasing you Bastila. It's fun."

Bastila glared at me. "Fun!….you think teasing me is fun!"

I grinned. "Well yea….but I also like teasing Carth, so don't read too much into it. Course it could be more….if you wanted it to be."

Bastila shook her head. "Really Phoenix….how can your thoughts and feelings flow in such a manner? You are…..a very odd woman."

I grinned. "I know….I am a hutt in human form."

Bastila shook her head. "Honestly, Phoenix, can you even try to be serious for once?"

I took a deep breath and resolved myself into a more serious manner. "For your sake, I'll try."

"Our connection allows us glimpses into each other's mind. We can feel some of what the other feels. And what I feel within you troubles me. A padawan must receive considerable training. They must learn to control their emotions and darker impulses. Often it takes years before using the Force can be considered safe. The fact that you are so strong in the Force and have had such relatively little training could have terrible consequences. For you, and for everyone around you."

"Well you could warn me…..if I do something bad. I don't know….maybe blink once for the Dark Side and twice for the Light."

Bastila shook her head. "Phoenix, this is not a joke! Why do you have to joke all the time? The choices you make could affect both our destinies, not to mention the fate of the Republic and the entire galaxy! There is much at stake."

"Yea….yea...so you keep telling me!"

"Already you exhibit the kind of willfulness and erratic behavior that will lead you to corruption."

I glared at Bastila. "Are you talking about me and Carth? Because honestly Bastila, I haven't been wantonly destroying planets like Malak…..or have been overly cruel. I saved Juhani, I brought Shen and Rahasia together."

Bastila sighed. "You are also an enigma, Phoenix because at other times you have exhibited a degree of compassion and self-control. I sincerely hope you can maintain _these_ traits rather than the others you have exhibited."

"Honestly Bastila, I feel like you're harassing me."

"I am not trying to harass you. But you must understand the trials and perils that lie ahead. For you, and for me. Our destinies are intertwined. Everything one of us does will have consequences for the other. Any reckless behavior on your part is likely to affect me as well. "

"Look Bastila, I am my own person. I am trying to live my life as best as I can….with this bond. Yet, I don't want to hurt you. I…." I bowed my head. "I think a lot of you."

"I believe you truly mean what you say. For now. But sometimes it is not so easy to keep such promises. Your power could be a gift or a curse. When you need guidance, or advice, or support I will do my best to help you stay on the path of the light."

We entered the ship and I wanted to ask her something else. "Bastila…."

She paused. "Yes Phoenix?"

"I...well I heard you killed Darth Revan."

Bastila's face blanched and she looked pained. "Oh Phoenix… I didn't kill Revan. Yet I feel like I must warn you, since you mentioned about my confrontation with Revan. It seems fate, or the Force, is driving us into a confrontation with the Dark Lord. You must prepare yourself for when we face Malak. The confrontation will be difficult for you. I remember how hard it was when I first faced Revan."

"But if you didn't kill Revan….."

"The Order's mission was to capture Revan, if possible. It was Malak who turned on his own master, firing upon Revan's ship while we were still on board it. It was his desire to kill us and his master both. Thankfully we narrowly escaped the vessel as it exploded. "

I snorted. "Well what do you expect from someone like Malak?"

"True, I suppose. And yet the outcome of that battle was… unexpected. To all of us. Revan's end was… unforeseen. "

I frowned. "Unforeseen? What do you mean?"

"As I said, we were there to capture Revan alive. The Jedi do not believe in killing their prisoners. No one deserves execution, no matter what their crimes. Remember that Revan and Malak were once great Jedi. Heroes in every sense of the word. They demonstrate the danger of the Dark Side to us all. I'm sorry. We really shouldn't speak of this anymore…"

I looked at Bastila, tears started to form in the corner of her eyes. "The memory of my confrontation with Revan is… painful, Phoenix."

She took off from me, leaving me alone.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I had lost whatever control I had, staring at Revan and telling her the story of her own capture broke my heart. I wanted to tell Phoenix the truth. I could no longer bear this and yet I was under orders from the Council not to tell Phoenix who she was. I had to be strong for the sake of the mission. I needed to meditate. I needed to calm myself. Why was the Force so cruel to me? To stare at Revan and lie to her, to treat her as if she wasn't who she was? Why? Breathe…..I needed to breathe….

I made it to the cargo hold and was getting ready to meditate when I found a girl in the cargo hold. I frowned.

She held onto a ration bar and was munching on it.

"Hello…."

The young girl spoke in a strange language. It sounded a bit like what I think was Mandalorian.

I didn't know Mandalorian. I spoke slowly to her. "Bastila….."

The girl frowned and shook her head and then stated. "Bas….til...a?"

I nodded. "That's right my name is Bastila."

I pointed to the girl. "Your name?"

The girl shook her head and spoke. "Na"

I nodded. "That's right name..."

"Na….nam…..name?"

I nodded. "Name…." I pointed to myself, "Bastila."

The girl's eyes went wide. "Ahh….Sasha…."

I smiled. "Sasha…."

I bowed lightly. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Sasha."

The girl shook her head, not understanding me and started speaking in a stream of Mandalorian. I sighed. "Wait here…."

I went to Canderous in the Hawk's garage. "Canderous….we have a stowaway. I can't understand a word she's saying. I think she's speaking Mandalorian."

Canderous snorted. "What! So suddenly I am a translator! You need to spend some credits on a protocol droid, Bastila. I am a mercenary, not a translator. Here's a radical idea, why don't you ask Phoenix? She seems to understand and speak a wide variety of languages. I am willing to bet Mandalorian is one of them."

I shook my head. "I'd rather not bother Phoenix at the moment. She has a lot going on at this moment in time, and you are a Mandalorian."

Canderous sighed. "Fine…."

The Mandalorian shouldered his weapon and we went back to the cargo hold to find the girl was gone. He rolled his eyes. "Seriously Bastila, you need to figure out how to deal with this on your own."

Canderous wandered off back to the garage where Davik's swoop bike was found.

I heard a stream of Mandalorian coming from two voices, I raised an eyebrow. I wandered close to the loading ramp and a distance away I found Phoenix chatting away in Mandalorian with the girl.

She sighed and picked up the girl and put her on her shoulders and walked out of the ship. Phoenix wasn't suppose to understand Mandalorian, although I could be wrong. I wasn't sure completely what dealings the "real" Phoenix Star had with Mandalorians. I doubted it had been cordial dealings. I'd have to ask her where she had picked up Mandalorian.

Phoenix re-entered the ship and she smiled softly and I turned to her. "So did you find out anything about….the girl?"

She entered. "Yea….the Mandalorians had "adopted" her. I asked around the Enclave about her. According to some twi'lek, she had been kidnapped, probably for a ransom. She seems to have forgotten Basic. I feel bad for her parents, they are probably going to have to learn Mandalorian." She suddenly laughed. "Now Mandalorian, that really is a robust language. "

I raised an eyebrow. "Phoenix….where did you learn Mandalorian?"

Phoenix grinned. "Trust me you don't want to know."

"I am curious…..where you exactly learned it, Phoenix."

She chuckled. "Are you sure? It might cause you to turn seven shades of red."

I frowned. "It can't be that bad… Phoenix."

She grinned. "Aggressive negotiations…..with some very strong Mandalorian clans and warriors. They captured me as a captive for invading their conquered territories….I...managed to...umm….how do I put this…..in a term not offensive to your delicate Jedi princess ears…..I guess the best turn of phrase would be, I renegotiated those terms." She laughed suddenly, "Like I said Mandalorian is a very robust language."

I groaned. "You are right….I did not wish to hear that if "renegotiated" is what I think it means."

Phoenix chuckled. "Well I wasn't always a Jedi. I almost ended up adopted by the clans, I was offered marriage but….I was a bit too restless even by Mandalorian standards."

"You really are a rogue, Phoenix."

"I was a smuggler….Bastila. And not just any smuggler, a smuggler who tried to keep the flames of war from burning the rim to ashes. I did what I had to do to survive. I'd do it again, if I had to."

She coughed. "Now if you'll excuse me, Bastila. I've got a promise I have to keep to Mission, at least before we leave."

I sighed, Master Dorak was right, the personality and memories I had picked for Revan…..it was a mistake. What in the Force had I been thinking, trying to find a background similar to Revan's. If I had to do it over….I would have picked a completely different personality and memory for her. The personality of a scholar would have been a better fit, now that I thought about it. Scholars didn't seem to act crazy and do crazy things like Phoenix did. Phoenix seemed…..well a bit too savory for my liking. However, there was something about her….that I liked. Although I wasn't exactly sure what it was. Maybe it was her carefree attitude. She seemed unencumbered and did as she liked without fear or retribution. I wondered how much of Phoenix was Phoenix and how much was Revan and did it overlap?

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Mission smirked. "So Nix, what do you you need my help with?"

"I need you to help me break into the Jedi archives."

Mission scratched her lekku. "Errr won't they cast you out for obtaining information you shouldn't have?"

I shook my head. "Look Mission, I have questions. I don't think the Jedi are going to be able to answer them at least not in the way I would want them answered. As soon as I download the information I need we will go off to those crystal caves and find those crystals. However….I need the skills of a skilled slicer. The archives are for masters and….well….I think the info I need won't be found in the sanitized approved records that Dorak has allowed to me. "

Mission frowned. "You look troubled, Nix. You normally call me Mish, so….ummm what's the matter. I am your friend, Nix. Please tell me."

I sighed. "I don't know….Mish…. I have some issues and I need answers. My….." I paused a moment,"I can't go off on this mission the Jedi have assigned to me till I get some sort of resolution to my own private fears."

"Fears? pfff…..you're Phoenix Star, Jedi Padawan you don't have fears over anything."

I laughed, "I wish that was true, Mish. It's an illusion, a mask, I wear. I am terrified, Mission. I am just able to hide it really well. Please can you help me?"

Mission looked at me and then grasped my hands. "Of course, Nix….what are friends for, except I kind of need to know what records you need from the archives."

I sighed, I knew I'd have to surrender some of my trust to Mission. "Records regarding dead Dark Lords of the Sith, and Dark Side possession."

"Possession? Nix what's going on? Why do you need information like that?"

"Might be nothing, Mish but...I think….well I am not sure. Please Mission, can you just help me get the info and not go into why I need it?"

Mission frowned. "You're serious, aren't you? Alright, I won't pry. If it makes you feel better I'll do it."

I smiled softly and then gave Mission a hug. "Thanks Mish….you're….you're like the sister I never had."

* * *

 **~Mission~**

Something was scaring Nix. I didn't know what it was but I promised her I wouldn't pry. But seriously dead Dark Lords of the Sith, Dark Side possession? Why did Nix need information like that? It worried me. Yet, I felt the same about her as she did about me. She was like a sister. If my sister was worried about something, then I had to help her out. I got it that she didn't want me to pry into why she wanted the information. This was like how I was about Griff and Lena. If Nix wanted to tell me what was bothering her later on, she'd tell me. Right now, I'd give her the support she needed.

Nix stopped and asked T3 to come along with us. The droid was acting a bit oddly around her. I frowned. "T3, what's going on with you? You act like you've got a stuck motivator."

The droid beeped and Nix shook her head. "No, I promise you I won't let anyone memory wipe you, T3. So don't worry what others have said to you about that. If they come threatening you with that I will beat them into the ground. No one threatens my droid like that and gets away with it."

T3 beeped some more and Nix frowned. "Of course I won't kill them. What an odd thing for you to say! Have you ever seen me harm any of our friends on the Hawk or on this plan….unless you're counting those Mandalorian raiders but that was in defense of others."

Nix turned to me and shook her head. "I seriously don't know what's gotten into T3. He acts like he's scared of me or something. He's never acted like that around me before."

I shrugged. "I don't know, Nix. Maybe he needs a diagnostic, a repair, or something…."

"Or something is right. "Nix bent down next to T3 and took a look at the droid as she briefly opened up his chassis and took a spanner to him. She shook her head. "He seems to be functioning alright. People say, these utility droids need memory wipes to keep them from developing quirks all the time, but I disagree. I say droids need their memory mostly in tact because if it's wiped then their response time isn't as good as before."

She got up and patted T3 on the top of his dome. "I need your help as well T3. I told Mission I need info from the Jedi archives and I believe you can help me too. I need info on the dead Dark Lords of the Sith and Dark Side possession."

T3 beeped and Nix frowned. "Of course….I'll be looking up Darth Revan. He's a dead Dark Lord of the Sith too. Bastila told me that Malak killed him."

T3 beeped some more and Nix's face scrunched up. "What do you mean the archives might be inaccurate?" She paused a moment. "Of course poor old Nemo said something similar, that Revan's past might not be accurate. Something about Revan's last master mucking it up. That Revan might not even be a 'He' or the possibility that Revan might not even be human. Yea, I'll consider the fact that the archives might not be accurate T3 but I've got to look this information up."

 **~o0o~**

We walked into the archives, I smiled as Phoenix talked to a young Jedi apprentice. He looked a bit like a light fixture and well just a bit naive. He had blond hair and blue eyes. I think Nix found out his name was Mical. She seemed to be chatting him up while T3 and I found a nearby computer terminal and we both started slicing into the database. I knew Nix, she was distracting the guy while T3 and I helped ourselves to the Jedi archives. No surprise we both found information that Nix was looking for that needed "Master" clearance. I found all sorts of info on a Freedon Nadd, Exar Kun, Revan, Ajunta Pall along with any other dead Sith. All the Sith that the Jedi would consider baddies. I had T3 download it along with information on Dark Side possession. It seemed that the Sith could possess or even tempt Jedi to go to the Dark Side.

I frowned, did Nix think she was possessed by a Sith Lord? If that was the case, then I could understand Nix's hesitation in not wanting to talk to me or even go to the Jedi or Bastila on this. I knew Nix didn't ask but I started looking up treatments for how to get rid of Dark Side possession and how to get rid of Dark Side spirits. She'd thank me later even if this wasn't the case for her inquiry. While I looked up the info, T3 downloaded it into his database.

T3 beeped a bit unsettled and I frowned. "What is it T3?"

The computer terminal switched over to translation and T3 stated ::Nothing. Poor Phoenix….::

I grimaced. "What do you mean 'Poor Phoenix' ?"

T3 beeped a long string and the screen stated ::This info will only drive her mad. She needs to talk to Bastila.::

"Yea, T3, but I don't think Nix trusts Bastila or the Jedi at this point and I can't say I blame her. If this info she wants has to deal with what I think it is, then Nix would want to stay as far away from stodgy old masters and Bastila."

T3 responded in a forlorned beep and I read:: Trust and honesty would go a long way right now.::

I nodded. "Probably T3, but I trust Nix and if she says she wants this info then we'll give it to her. Besides, T3, Nix is a smart woman, she'll figure out what's going on. She always does, y'know. Anyway I am done finding the info she needs. Let's go get Nix and get out of here."

T3 unplugged from the terminal and we went back to Nix who was still talking to Mical.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

While Mission and T3 were busy with my own personal reconnaissance I stopped and spoke with an apprentice who seemed to have been left in charge of the archives. Although what an apprentice was doing in the archives kind of puzzled me.

He smiled. "I am new here. Welcome to the archives, padawan. You are?"

I grinned. "My name is Phoenix Star and you are?"

"Mical, Mical Tristian. I just arrived on Dantooine recently. I am Master Dorak's personal assistant and hopefully that will be a permanent title. He is helping me learn the archival retrieval system. Plus I hope eventually he takes me on as a student. He has a few others that are vying for the position but I believe he has told me that I hold the most promise."

Ahh that explained why the apprentice was in here, Master Dorak trusted him. It left me with a slightly soured feeling within me. Master Dorak didn't trust me. Well neither did Vrook, but still...an apprentice can be here all day close to sensitive records and not me! What the frack!

He then sighed and said. "I just wish he would pick soon. If I don't get a teacher soon. I'll be sent away from the Order."

I frowned. "You mean….if you don't have a teacher the Jedi will deny you more training."

He looked skyward. "I had a knight express interest in me before….but….he…."

"He what?"

"He went off with Revan to fight in the Mandalorian wars. He came back but….he wasn't the same. He came back broken and a shell of his former self."

I raised an eyebrow. "That sounds familiar, I think I've heard this story before."

Mical nodded. "I wouldn't be surprised. The story about the Jedi exile, Liam Mandrel, is pretty infamous. It was rumored that he loved Revan and his devotion to the Knight Revan pulled him off to the wars. Unfortunately, that left me without a teacher. Now I hope that….Master Dorak chooses to instruct me in the archives. I wish to be a historian, Padawan Phoenix. If you've seen the masters lately, could you? Could you possibly put in a good word for me? I am getting desperate, and I know this is probably not fair to you but I need a teacher."

I felt sorry for the poor kid, in many respects I had it a lot better than this poor apprentice did. There simply wasn't enough knights and masters to teach apprentices. It didn't seem fair that I had all the luck or the Force behind me while this poor guy couldn't even get a master or knight to consider taking him on.

I gave a long sigh. "I am just a lowly padawan, Mical. I can't even convince the council to destroy some old ruins. All I get is...we will take it under advisement. If you're that desperate, Mical, and if I were you. I'd have a firm talk with Master Dorak. Tell him straight, that if he feels you hold the most promise that he should take you on as a student, that's all I can suggest."

Mical shook his head. "But I am just an apprentice…..padawan. I can't speak out like that, it wouldn't be proper. A master or knight has to come up to me and say, I wish you to be my student. If they don't then I can't be a student. If I did as you suggest I might be cast out of the Order for my impatience."

I looked incredulous, if this was the case for the Jedi, not even to show any initiative and you had to wait for a knight or a master to come up to you and say, I wish to take you on as a student, than I felt really bad for this kid. I should find this exile Liam Mandrel and give him a piece of my mind that he left his poor student without a trainer. "Well…..apprentice. I wish you all the best and I hope the Force favors you soon with an instructor."

I saw Mission and T3 come along side of me. I smiled at the two of them. "Come on Mish….let's go check out those crystal caves."

We walked out of the archives and I smiled at Mission. "I take it you got the info I needed."

Mission nodded. "Yea, Nix, me and T3 got it."

I grinned. "Thanks, Mission and you too T3."

We exited the archive and ran into Master Jax.

She smiled at me. "Padawan...I've been looking for you. Without Bastila, actually I…." She looked contemplative. "I want you to have my holocron."

I frowned. "Your holocron? Why?"

She sighed. "I've been looking for the right student to give this to and….I know where you are going that you will end up taking many lives. It is my teachings and my husband's teachings. It Is all our teachings on Jedi healing techniques. I know padawan, that taking life will hurt you far more than you realize. You must heal and learn to heal others. If you do not heal….then the pain and the darkness will consume you."

I scratched my head. "But I don't even know if I have the talent to heal. And there is another Jedi that could probably do with the teachings of a master." I was thinking about that poor Mical, he needed a teacher why couldn't Master Jax take him on?

She shook her head. "I have made my decision, padawan. I want you to have my holocron."

"Wait a minute...didn't you say your husband fell…..and became a Sith?"

Jax sighed. "It is true he fell to the Dark Side and became a Sith."

"How does a Jedi whose strength is in healing become a Sith?"

Jax looked forlorned and said to me. "Like any other Jedi, Padawan Star. He was consumed not just with the pain of others but by the pain he took upon himself when he healed. He wanted…." She paused and sighed in a painful sigh. "He wanted to halt death. He was consumed by wanting to keep others from dying. It is the path of being a healer to keep others from pain and death. However, with my husband, it became an obsession, padawan. He was unable to accept that even death can be the will of the Force. He sought out immortality and believed that Exar Kun could give it to him and his followers. I never saw him again, padawan. Yet, there are rumors that he was killed in that tragic final battle on Yavin 4 and….. that he refused to die."

I cringed. "What?"

Master Jax sighed. "My husband Sydo Jax…..was a determined man, padawan. I would not be surprised if the rumors didn't end up being true. He knew the strength of healing and even healing can become a corruption of the Dark Side."

I took a look at the holocron that Master Jax handed me. "This doesn't have any creepy Dark Side healing or manipulations on it, does it?"

She shook her head. "No…..these are his teachings and mine before he fell. I feel very strongly about this though padawan, your path will be filled with pain ….you will need healing in your life otherwise your soul will be filled with the blood of the slain. Take my teachings, padawan. Try and fill your life with healing for the lives you take."

I sighed and took the healer's holocron. She seemed rather insistent. "I will keep your words in mind, Master Jax."

She nodded. "That is all I ask, Padawan. May the Force be with you on your journey." She wandered off and Mission shook her head. "I don't care what you say, Nix. That Jedi is still a creepy chick."

I chuckled. "She taught me a few things, Mish. Yea, I admit that there are unusual Jedi out in the galaxy but sometimes it is the peculiar ones that teach the best lessons."

 **~o0o~**

We stopped by the Hawk because we decided that this was a venture that needed not only Mission and T3, but Zaalbar as well. We then set off for the crystal caves that Master Zhar and even Nemo had referenced. We traveled along side the cliffs of Dantooine and skirted them till we found a tunnel. This had to be the entrance we were looking for. We entered and darkness assaulted our eyes. I fumbled around and ignited the green and blue lightsabers that I held using the lightsabers more as glow sticks than as a weapon. T3 turned on a glowrod on his chassis to help illuminate the dark cave. I shivered it was a bit nippy. I could hear the dripping of water. There was the hissing of kinraths. I said to my group. "Keep your eyes peeled….. there are kinraths in this cave."

Zaalbar moaned. "These creatures are found on my home as well. They are considered a worthy challenge to hunters."

T3 beeped::These rocks are hard on my treads::

"Yea….well I don't think these caves were made for droids in mind."

Mission kept her hands on her blasters as we ended up deeper and deeper into the caves

The hissing got louder and I opened myself to the Force and used a Force push. I knew it was a bit rash and perhaps reckless to use the Force to push blindly, However, I really didn't consider it a blind push because I felt something. I just didn't know where it was. I heard a cry and the Kinrath came rushing forth. Yea...I kind of figured I stirred that nest.

Zaalbar moaned out a wookiee battle cry and went towards the kinrath with a vibroblade and Mission fired her blasters away. T3 fired away with his blasters as well and then used a stream of fire from a blowtorch. I went charging forward with my lightsabers and went into combat. The kinrath tried to stab away at me and Zaalbar. I gasped as I felt kinrath venom go through me. I groaned and I used the Force and cleansed the poison from my body. The kinrath swarmed around us and I used the Force once again and managed to put the kinrath into a form of stasis. The stasis gave us time to simply pick off the kinrath one by one. Zaalbar moaned. "Phoenix Star….that's not fair to your prey."

I snorted. "No, but….I don't think the kinrath play fair."

Zaalbar considered my words and stated. "That is true...but you take away the sport of the hunt with your use of the Force."

I mulled over Zaalbar's words. He had a point but...I wasn't a hunter. Yet, I guess I could understand Zaalbar's desire of fair play or fair sport when it came to taking down these creatures. The kinrath bodies lay dead as we took them down. The end of the combat did not seem too fair and I was left feeling kind of unsatisfied. I begrudgingly began to agree with Zaalbar, what good was it to put an enemy in a Force hold if an opponent was so easily overpowered?

We came to a cliff edge and I peaked down the cliff to see the glowing of crystals. I took out some climbing gear. I watched as claws came from Zaalbar's furry paws. I frowned, I had never seen wookiees with claws before. Zaalbar saw my frown. "They are tools, Phoenix Star. They will help me climb down this cliff face."

"I just have never seen or known wookiees to have claws."

"They are tools, Phoenix Star. We prefer to use them for climbing and for other mundane tasks. It is wrong to use them for anything else other than tools. We hide them away when we are not using them. It is why we call any wookiee who uses them in anger or anyone who is possessed with anger in a fight a madclaw."

I looked at T3. "Looks like you're going to have to stay put, T3."

T3 beeped.::Be careful, Phoenix. I don't want to have to go fetch Bastila and tell her you got into trouble.::

I suddenly laughed. "Yea, I don't think I want you to fetch her either. She has an annoying habit of scolding me like I am her child. Phoenix don't do this….Phoenix don't do that. Phoenix this leads to the Dark Side."

Mission began to laugh. "That sounds like Bastila, Nix."

I sighed. "Yea….well I am sick of it. So I'll try and keep myself from getting hurt. I have absolutely no desire to have you fetch Bastila, T3."

I helped Mission into a climbing harness as well as got into a harness myself. We then began our slow descent down the rock face. I cringed as I noticed kinraths scurrying down the cliff face. Mission grasped hold of the rock in a hand hold with one hand and took out her blaster and fired at the kinrath. A couple of them screamed in pain and crashed down the cliff face to the bottom of the cave where the crystals were,

Zaalbar growled. "They are climbers. They do this back on my home as well."

"Wonderful."

I kept my feet held onto a foot hold and took out my lightsaber. I ignited the lightsaber and flung the lightsaber with the Force at one of the kinrath. The kinrath lost it's hold on the rock face and went tumbling down below us.

I caught my lightsaber as it came back to me. I looked around for any more kinrath in the darkness and I couldn't find anymore. "I hate to think what's waiting down below with those crystals. Nemo said that the kinrath love the heat and light given off by those crystals."

Zaalbar said calmly. "I can climb faster than you and Mission. I will go further down and clear the way for you, Phoenix Star."

I nodded. "Alright Zaalbar, but be careful."

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

I quickly scurried down the cliff face. I promised Phoenix Star I would clear out the kinrath that lay below where the crystals lay. I missed climbing like this. It wasn't the wroshyr trees of my home but it felt good to climb like I use to on my home. I could also see very well in the dark of this cave, it reminded me of the Shadowlands of home. I suddenly felt homesick. I wish I had never drew out my claws against my brother. Yet, I had. I had been so angry to find my brother had betrayed our clan that I had lashed out in anger. My clan turned their back on me and made me an exile. I had no choice but to leave as a wookiee without a clan can't survive on their own on Kashyyyk.

Taris had been no better as a choice but it was the only destination that I could manage to get with a Sullustan trader named Roz Viz. I was lucky that the trader was no friend to Czerka and saw me as an equal. All he asked for was that I help him load various fruits, nuts and tack glands from my home. He also asked me to protect him from the Exchange. I had no idea what that sort of trouble meant till he arrived on Taris and one of Davik's men killed him, took his merchandise and tried to claim me as a slave. I managed to run from them and climbed down the buildings of the Upper City to the Lower City. I was still in a daze till Mission found me and tried to protect me from those Vulkars. So much had happened since then. Now I honored the lifedebt I had with Phoenix Star and she seemed an honorable woman. She did after all save my life. Clearing out the kinrath was a small way I could honor my lifedebt to her.

I reached the bottom of the cliff and the cavern glowed with the light of the crystals. The hiss of the kinrath filled my ears and let out a cry as I rushed at the kinrath and proceeded to attack them with my vibroblade. The Shadowlands would not claim me today. I still was fighting them when I heard the hiss of Phoenix Star's lightsabers and she joined me in the fight. She chose not to use the Force as much as she had the first time. Perhaps she had agreed with me the last time she had fought the kinrath that using the Force was not as honorable against prey like this. Mission's blasters fired and echoed in the cave. The Force shimmered around Phoenix Star as she shielded herself in the Force. I wondered occasionally how serving a lifedebt with a Jedi would work. Phoenix was a powerfully strong woman. Yet, she accepted my help when I offered it to her. We cleared out the hive kinrath but the last kinrath was a tough creature, the queen.

She fought viciously. This kinrath wouldn't go down easy, as it would fight for its eggs. It's eggs were the future of the kinrath hive. A mother always fights for its offspring. Phoenix's eyes took on a cold glare as she went promptly to one of the eggs and sliced away at the egg. The egg yielded to the lightsabers like slicing through a soft cheese. Green embryonic fluid came pouring forth from the egg. The queen let out a vicious cry and went after her.

She laughed and leaped away from the queen and sliced at one of the other eggs. The fluid poured out and splashed her in the face and on her robes.

I moaned out."Phoenix….you're only making the queen mad."

She grinned as she went to more eggs and sliced into them. The queen cried out in a mad furious cry and went scurrying after Phoenix.

Phoenix smiled as she stood by the last egg and the queen attacked with a fury.

"That's right…..attack me. Protect your last egg."

I cocked my head, I could not understand why Phoenix was goading the kinrath queen into a vicious fury. Unless….my eyes went wide. The queen was distracted. It was paying more attention to her than to me and Mission. It was a dangerous act of a warrior or hunter to lead prey away from others and take the risk upon themselves. Phoenix Star took the risk upon herself, something I should have done.

I took out my bowcaster and aimed it at the queen and fired. Mission fired her blasters as well. The queen paused it turned away from Phoenix and turned towards us.

Phoenix laughed. "Stupid kinrath…." She sliced her lightsabers into the final egg. The queen let out a mournful cry and turned back to Phoenix. Her lightsabers plunged deep into the head of the kinrath queen. The queen let out one more vicious cry and then lay still at its death.

I barked out. "That was a worthy hunt, Phoenix Star."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The Force poured through me strongly as I fought the kinrath queen. Why did I not feel this before? Zaalbar was right. I should not deny myself combat. The Force was one aspect but combat was another. I felt alive, I felt passion. Something the Jedi did not believe in. The queen's fury only seemed to fuel my passion and my desire to fight. Why was this so wrong? Yet it made me wonder, how could a Jedi fight, and remain calm and passionless, they could kill without feeling, and claim peace, claim serenity. Such thoughts during combat seemed sickening to me, because if you could be a passionless combatant and kill without feeling, what kind of Jedi were you? To me, that was just as bad as being a Sith. No, it was better to feel emotions in combat rather than to deny them. However, one had to be careful with feeling emotions and letting them drive you in combat. I remembered back on Taris how I let emotion consume me and I let it control me. If Carth hadn't been there I would have been killed. So I had to find the right balance, between passion, emotion, and self control.

"That was a worthy hunt, Phoenix Star."

I nodded at Zaalbar. "It was a worthy hunt, Zaalbar."

I took a look at the crystals that glowed and pulsed with it's own light. I smiled at Mission. "Let's harvest some of these crystals and get out of here. "

Mission and I quietly began to break off crystals from the crystal formations. I looked in the eggs I had smashed and even found crystals within the eggs. I was uncertain how the crystals ended up in the eggs but the kinrath queen seemed sensitive to the death of her eggs and reacted very violently. I thought about it and then made the connection that the Force could be found even in the most crude of creatures perhaps that is why the kinrath queen made her den in this cavern.

Mission and I finished gathering crystals and I said. "Let's get out of here and back to the Hawk."

* * *

A/N: Just to let people who are reading I am updating things that reviewers have brought to my attention. I've re-done chapters 17 and 18 regarding Phoenix's life debt with Zaalbar as well as added an additional POV with Mission with her confrontation with the rancor. I will probably will be updating some other chapters later on and I will let you know because It's come to my attention that I have some inconsistencies in some of my other chapters and I will be fixing those as well. Just thought I'd let everyone who is following that if someone points out something that seems a bit off. I will fix it so it makes better sense.

Also the Scholar persona is tribute to Ether's fic. Ether has been most kind reviewing my work and catching my errors.


	41. Chapter 40: Dantooine: All Roads Lead

**Chapter 40: Dantooine: All Roads Lead….**

 **~Bastila~**

"Masters, before we leave. I wish to let you know that Revan's memories are slowly coming back to her. It is fortunate that I don't think she suspects that it is her memories. I've managed to convince her that her memories are visions. But, her latest visions shows her on Malachor V and an academy. It is possible that Revan and Malak found out info regarding the Star Forge from this academy."

Master Dorak nodded. "I know of no academy in our records found on Malachor V. This academy is a mystery. Although knowing the history of Malachor V, it is very much likely this academy is an academy of the Sith, much like the academy the Sith have on Korriban. It would be foolish to send a Jedi to Malachor V as it is foolish to send a Jedi to Korriban."

I sighed. "But we have to go to Korriban to find the Star Map, and I don't completely trust Phoenix. I will try and stall her going to Korriban. I fear she is falling to the Dark Side, Masters."

Master Vrook looked thoughtful. "Bastila….how are you doing?"

I frowned. No one had thought to have asked me about my welfare. To have Master Vrook ask me how I was fairing with Revan was a good question. I was actually a bit relieved to have the Master inquire regarding my well-being. "I am managing well despite the circumstances, Master Vrook. Although, I wish I didn't have to deal with this bond. It is very overwhelming to me. I feel things, I shouldn't feel. Desires, I shouldn't have. I think….if I had to do this over again, Master Vrook. I would not have so foolishly chosen the background I did for Revan. I…."

I paused….no, I was afraid to say what I truly wanted to Master Vrook. The truth being, I didn't want to murder Revan's persona. I wanted a compatible personality so I did not have the guilt. The guilt of destroying who Revan was. Revan was a hero, despite the fact she had fallen to the Dark side. Yet, as I reflected over Revan I constantly felt that I had made a mistake.

"I made a mistake, Master Vrook."

Vrook snorted. "And your mistake may cause the galaxy to fall into darkness for over a thousand generations plus end up being the death of the Jedi and the death of the Order itself. Yet….there is little we can do now with your mistake, Padawan Shan. You must watch Revan and keep trying to keep her from falling into the dark."

Master Dorak held up a hand. "The Force does not make mistakes, Bastila…..but..."

I interjected cutting Master Dorak off. "There is another factor we must tread carefully on….regarding Revan and….the Repub..."

Master Dorak spoke cutting me off. "You speak of the Republic. Yes, I am aware of what's going on. Apparently Senator Artemis Sandren had Fleet intelligence pay her a visit."

I nodded. "Yes and Captain Onasi started asking questions about Phoenix and her amnesia and the fact that Phoenix has a doppelganger on Naboo. I….well I managed to distract him. He won't be asking questions about her. Plus I cut the longer range comm system so Carth won't be getting any more intelligence from the Fleet. However, I wish to know how do you wish me to tread with the fact that the Republic may end up pounding on our door."

Vandar spoke. "I will speak once again to the chancellor and…."

I spoke up. "What will you tell him, Master Vandar? Will you tell him that Revan may not be as dead as we claimed? And that not only is Revan most definitely not a man...but a woman, that she is alive and thinks she is a smuggler named Phoenix Star. And the real Phoenix Star happens to be alive and living under the name Phoenix Naberrie on Naboo. Master Dorak, you told me that in all likelihood that Phoenix Star was dead. Well apparently, she isn't."

Vrook glared at me. "That is enough…..Bastila! You are overstepping your authority padawan! Trust in the council. We will handle this. This bond you have with Revan is clearly affecting you more than you realize. Her defiance I sense within you, that is not what you need for this mission. Perhaps it was wise that we are sending Juhani with you, maybe Juhani would be a better guide towards not only Revan but to you."

I cringed, I turned red with deep embarrassment. Master Vrook was right, I had lessened my trust with the Order by speaking out like I had. Revan's brashness was rubbing off on me. I took a breath and breathed, "There is no emotion…..there is peace….there is no passion, there is serenity…."

I sighed. "Forgive me, masters. I meant no disrespect."

Master Dorak said calmly."Phoenix's memories had to come from somewhere, Bastila. I did a deeper check on Phoenix Star when we began to assemble a construct for Revan and much to my surprise I found that she was indeed alive and living a rather unassuming life on Naboo, married to her third cousin. She has crossed our path in the past, Bastila. She was injured and left for dead out on the dunes of Tatooine. She came to us with a good deal of vibroblade cuts, burned, badly scarred and quite out of her mind. Her injuries…." he sighed, "were quite similar to Revan's actually. So we had a record of….her but not under the name Star but under the name Naberrie. Her cousin….was afraid...afraid that it might be found out by others that she had survived the attack so gave Phoenix his last name."

My eyes went wide. "Here...at this...this..." I stuttered, "Enclave... that means….Master Jax….had access to the real Phoenix and….healing…." It began to make sense why Jax had kept an active interest on Phoenix/Revan to begin with and I had been angry with the healer for no reason. I….felt ashamed I needed to apologize to the healer."

Master Dorak nodded, "So you see the Force was with you in your choice of personality and memories for Revan. We had a plethora of records on Phoenix Star that we didn't even realize we had till we began to utilize her life for Revan."

I bowed my head, "All this time I thought I was beginning to think that choosing Phoenix Star as the construct for Revan was a mistake."

Master Dorak shook his head. "The Force makes no mistakes, Bastila. Nor are there coincidences. Phoenix Star's life was meant to touch Revan's life for good or for evil. Perhaps there is more good in the "real" Phoenix Star Naberrie's life then your realize, Bastila. Trust the Force, trust the council, and trust the Order."

I felt heavy inside, apparently the Masters knew more than I realized. Master Dorak's words humbled me. The masters were wise and perhaps they were wise to withhold this knowledge from me. After all I was only a padawan. It still puzzled me why they would do so since I had been attached to Revan. Did the Masters trust me? I began to ponder over this. How could they not trust me with such knowledge? I needed to trust the Force, the council and the Order. _Trust the Force, Trust the council, Trust the Order._ I kept repeating over and over to myself. _Trust the Force, Trust the Council, Trust the Order._ I am a Jedi, and it was imperative that I trust the Masters no matter what. Yet...something nagged at me ever so darkly that the Masters had deceived me. How dare they! I breathed calmly. _No…..trust the Force. There is only the Force._

I said softly, "Masters….I am sorry….I had no idea. I will trust your wisdom. We will be leaving soon for Tatooine"

Master Vandar smiled. "May the Force be with you Bastila."

I bowed my head and found the peace I was seeking as I retreated from the council. I felt at peace, the Force was with us on this mission. The Force was with Revan and with me. I was sure of it.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I quietly went through the data that T3 had downloaded in my bunk area. It gave me more of a headache. What in the Force was I thinking? A disembodied voice, that didn't say who they were, had a very Dark Side view of things and was trying to control or manipulate my actions. It was like trying to find a star in a black hole and realizing the star had been consumed. I looked kind of glum.

T3 beeped::Phoenix…..did you find what you were looking for?::

I sighed. "T3. I can't find any answers. Just a whole lot of data on Sith Lords and a hodgepodge of info on how to get rid of Dark Side possession that is highly conflicting."

Some of these treatments dealt with severing my connection to the Force. Ummm, I don't think so. Some dealt with a plethora of complex rituals that basically had me find a wellspring of the Light Side and sitting in it for days on end. That sounded harmless enough, but where does one find a source of pure Light Side energy? The text also warned that such energy could kill a person. Geesh, I don't think so either. Another treatment suggested, that I go back to where I had been infected and confront the spirit and reject it and send it back to where it had come from. Uhh….I don't even know where I had picked the infernal thing up. Taris? That is when I heard the voice? But Taris had bit the dust. The Endar Spire? An exploded fire ball. Maybe Coruscant in the cantina? Or was it even further back? Nope, that treatment wasn't going to work. Plus my spirit, was very persuasive, I rejected it's words and then later on to my dismay I'd found I had agreed with their words.

I shook my head and looked at T3, "I don't think the Jedi fully even know how to get rid of a Sith spirit, who wants your soul. All the treatments seem like suppositions, like this might work or it might not. Regardless this knowledge sure as frack didn't do much good for Exar Kun, he ended up consumed by the Sith spirit, that he was possessed by. I am absolutely fracked, T3."

::Talk to Bastila, Phoenix. She is your friend.::

I nodded. "You might be right, T3. But I am scared."

T3 beeped bemusedly::You're a Jedi, fear is irrational. You can't control things beyond your control.::

I chuckled. "Yea, unless you're Bastila then you should fear the Dark Side and according to her, I can control that."

T3 beeped firmly::She might be right, Phoenix. She's only warning you because she fears it herself and fears enough for the both of you.::

"Yea… I get that, T3. But some of the rules the Jedi have are absolutely ridiculous. I can't fully follow the Jedi code. I mean….some of the code seems highly contradictory but…." I sighed,"I'll follow it as best as I can, for Bastila's sake."

I stood up, I felt Bastila's arrival on the Hawk. I smiled softly. "T3, do me a favor, please don't say anything to Bastila about my doubts or the fact that I may be possessed by a Sith spirit. I don't think it's an auspicious way to begin a mission, with me claiming Force possession."

T3 beeped::Of course, Phoenix. Phoenix….do you know what you're going to do with your Sith spirit?::

I shook my head. "Sadly I don't, T3. If you notice anything off about me...well..." I grinned, "beep once for Light and twice for Dark."

T3 beeped twice and I frowned. "What am I that bad?"

::Well you did have me and Mission download material from the Jedi that you shouldn't have. You say you have issues with the Jedi code….you committed genetic fusion with Cart...::

I quickly cut off T3. "Fine I get the point. Geesh….you are as bad as Bastila, T3."

::Well you did say I could beep once for Light and twice for Dark.::

"Gee thanks for not trusting me, T3. Even fracking Master Dorak doesn't trust me. Who is next in not trusting me Bastila, Mission?"

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I peaked into the bunk room that Phoenix was in talking with T3. I overheard some of Nix's conversation.

"Gee thanks for not trusting me, T3. Even fracking Master Dorak doesn't trust me. Who is next in not trusting me Bastila, Mission?"

I was worried about Nix but to hear that Nix felt that people couldn't trust her. T3 began to beep in protest but I interrupted the droid.

I said firmly. "Well I trust you, Nix. Me and Big Z we owe you our lives. Even if you are possessed by some creaky old Sith Lord. You've proven yourself to me, Nix and in the long run that matters more to me than some fear you have."

Nix frowned. "Who said I was possessed by a Sith Lord?"

I rolled my eyes. "Come off of it Nix, you asked me to download information about Dark Side possession and content about the Dark Lords of the Sith from the Jedi archives. I maybe young but I am not stupid. Besides denial doesn't suit you."

"Just promise me you won't say anything to anybody about this, not even Zaalbar and especially not Carth."

T3 beeped in response and Nix sighed sadly. "Yea, I know I should tell him, but….he had troubles with me back on Taris and….well he gets overwrought. I know it's because of his past, and I can't...well I can't blame him. It's taken me so long to gain his trust, his respect. If he thought something was off about me…." She looked like she was going to cry, "it would break his heart and mine."

I laid a hand on Nix's shoulder. "You really love him that strongly, don't you?"

Nix nodded. "With every fiber of my being, Mish. I've never felt I'd ever meet my equal, Mish or feel like I do about him. I don't want to hurt him. He means the galaxy to me."

I smiled softly. "Well, Nix. I promise I won't say a word, cut my head tails off and hope to die."

Nix smiled and I hugged her, I grinned and then wrapped my thumb around her thumb, "I even pinky swear...I won't tell a soul."

She squeezed my shoulder and then said. "Thanks my little twi'lek sister, best buds till the galaxy ends. Come on, I have to talk to Canderous and Carth about this mission the Jedi Order has assigned us to, the order says they can come with us, but in the end the decision to stay is theirs."

I nodded. "So you think Carth and Canderous might not stay."

She shrugged. "I don't know. Carth is assigned to the Republic fleet, he goes where they tell him to go. Canderous is a free agent, he is a mercenary like I once was. I can't blame him if he wants to space this joint. The Order could probably pay him to stay or… someone could pay him enough to find a job elsewhere. Although he's not exactly fond of the Jedi, he might not take their offer, well that's not exactly true about disliking the Jedi, he has a Mandalorian pride and honor about Revan. Despite the fact that Revan totally crushed and scattered the clans."

I frowned. "That's kind of twisted, Nix."

Nix shrugged. "Well...Mandalorians have a complex code of honor and I suppose in their minds they admire their conqueror. Knowing Canderous, if Revan was alive, he'd probably swear allegiance to him despite the fact, Revan would probably kill him in the process for being a Mandalorian. Although who could say what Revan would do? Me…."

She sighed. "I'd listen to Canderous and welcome his help. The Republic needs warriors and the Republic is foolish to ignore a source of warriors that could help them defeat the Sith. If the Republic doesn't consider them, they could easily ally themselves with the Sith. They've done it before with Exar Kun. So it's foolish for the Republic to ignore the Mandalorians. Revan should have taken control of the clans, even if he was considered an outsider. He proved himself over Mandalore and should have demanded the Mandalorians serve him. Yet...perhaps Revan was so full of hate over the war….that he refused to do so. I could understand Revan's hate though."

She paused. "The Mandalorians killed my family, and at one time I wanted every filthy Mandalorian dead. Yet….time heals….and although the pain is still there, my pain is nothing compared to the pain of others in the galaxy. The galaxy needs to be unified and united. In the end, the Mandalorians need to serve the Republic….before...well before Malak comes to the realization of this as well and goes to the clans and snatches them up as an ally."

I scratched my head tails. "Gee Nix, that sounds rather precise like what a general would say? It seems you've done a lot of thinking over this."

"I read a lot of things and did a lot of thinking on my long smuggling runs when I was alone. Hyperspace is boring. I'll tell you a secret, Mish. I hate space travel. It's so long, boring, and empty. You'll go for hours, days, sometimes weeks with nothing. Long trips it's better to be in stasis. But I hate stasis and I hate floating around in kolto tanks. I am claustrophobic, Mish. I spent weeks on end in damn narrow stasis chambers and I felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin. So I skipped that in the end and I spent those long journeys reading everything I could. Some stuff I read twice."

I shrugged. "Seems kind of boring, Nix. I would much rather binge watch Holovids."

Nix laughed. "Holovids are nothing more than rubbish propaganda. Anyway come on let's go talk to the others and find out if they are going to be staying with us on this journey."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"Master Jax….I wish to apologize for my words and comments earlier to you with Revan."

Master Jax looked at me and smiled. "There was no offense taken, padawan. You are under a lot of stress and strain."

I sighed. "It was wrong of me. I had….had no idea that you had a background with the umm….real Phoenix Star."

"You mean Phoenix Naberrie. Yes….I knew her as well as Revan. You think this was easy for me, Bastila. It hasn't been."

"Master Jax, what was the real Phoenix like?"

She sighed. "I don't honestly know, Bastila. She may have been every bit like the implanted Phoenix within Revan. I however, do not know. The woman I dealt with was broken, damaged, hurt, and in pain, not unlike how you found Revan. Every bone in Phoenix's body was broken, she lost an eye. Her cousin, weeped over her. He feared she would die. She was in a coma for weeks, clinging to life by a narrow thread. When she did wake, she was broken inside. She was bitter and racked with pain. She wanted to die."

This felt familiar, I remember feeling Revan's spirit when I filled her with the Force to save her life. Revan's spirit was damaged and filled with agony and despair. She had wanted nothing more than to surrender to oblivion. I raised an eyebrow. "Well apparently she's alive, Master Jax. So she didn't die….but….how did she….survive?"

Jax sighed. "Her cousin loved her Bastila. Love saved that poor broken woman. It was as good if not a better medicine than I could provide. He showed that no matter how broken she was, he loved her. He brought her out of her darkness of spirit and loved her. She began to feel life once again and her soul was renewed and her physical body recovered some as well. They married here at the Enclave and went back together to Naboo. I have no idea what happened after that, Bastila. Phoenix Star became Phoenix Naberrie. She had made some powerful enemies as a smuggler, Bastila, at least that is what she told me and part of the reason she abandoned her last name."

"Enemies! Master Jax…..does that mean that Revan will be hounded by the real Phoenix's enemies? As if my being hunted by Malak isn't enough!"

"Perhaps. But this Phoenix Star is a Jedi, and not just any Jedi, Bastila but the legendary or infamous, if you wish Revan. She will fair better I think than Phoenix Naberrie"

I sighed and shook my head. "I wish I had your confidence, Master Jax."

"Trust the Force, Bastila. There is a reason as to why Revan is Phoenix Star. A reason why the real Phoenix ended up here, and why you out of all the profiles selected the persona of a woman I treated. After all….what are the chances? But you know as well as I do that there is no such thing as luck or happenstance. It was suppose to happen. I don't know why it was suppose to happen but it has."

I nodded, Master Jax's words made a lot of sense. "We are most likely headed to Tatooine, Master Jax. I suppose it is inevitable we will be headed towards some of the real Phoenix's past."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

All the crew had been assembled and Bastila and Juhani stood by us. We were the three Jedi and Bastila said firmly, "We are headed on a dangerous mission for the Jedi Order. There are no masters or knights coming with us. We can expect no backup. We are on our own. We are to find the Star Maps and find the Star Forge, which we believe is where Malak is getting his support. We draw the proverbial line in the sand. Choose to come with us...or choose to leave. There is no shame in leaving. Regardless we have a mission from the Order."

Carth sighed, he looked at me and then back at the three of us. "I still think this is a suicide mission but I've been assigned by Admiral Dodonna to the Jedi and you three have the support of the Republic. I will stand by your mission."

Canderous said firmly. "I haven't much use for the Jedi, but I am not really here for the Jedi. I am here to support Phoenix. She has the spirit of a Mandalorian in her, the spirit of a warrior. She proved that in her fight against Bendak Starkiller, she proved it in the fields of Dantooine taking down rogue Mandalorians. I will stand by her side, I will give her aid when she needs it. Whatever path she has, I believe it is worthy of my time, my talent and skills."

I turned beet red with embarrassment, what was it with Canderous thinking I was some sort of Mandalorian warrior? I had absolutely no desire to be a Mandalorian. They had killed my parents and brother, they had turned my world up on end. I had rejected adoption and even marriage by the clans in the past because of my family. Yet, I was starting to look at my life in another way. If the Mandalorians hadn't invaded my home and ruined my life, I would have never become a smuggler, I would have never ended up hired on the Endar Spire and I would have lived my life void of the influence of the Force in my life. So maybe I did owe the Mandalorians some credit for my life, just a little. I needed to realize that maybe I was a bit more Mandalorian than I wanted to admit. As a Jedi, I needed to let go of my past and I thought I had, but I was still was hanging onto my past and it's pain. I needed to see Canderous as an ally and not as an enemy.

Carth was glaring at Canderous. I could feel a flash of jealousy from Carth. Yea, I guess I had gotten close enough to Carth that I could feel and sense his feelings. Did Force bonds extend to non-Force sensitives? But didn't Carth say he had a glimmer of the Force in his life? Uhh great, that's all I needed was two Force bonds. Plus could Carth feel me? It was possible, he did have a slight connection. But seriously, didn't he realize that Canderous was old enough to be my father, not that I would condemn a winter and summer romance but still, Carth needed to realize that there was nothing between me and Canderous. I had a feeling that Canderous wanted to adopt me, as a daughter to his clan. He might still do so, but I hadn't completely passed the various initiation processes to be considered his daughter.

I sighed, it was time to let go of my hate and pain for the Mandalorians and accept that I was far more interconnected into the Mandalorians than I realized. So If Canderous did offer adoption, perhaps this time I would not reject it as I had done in the past. I hadn't been ready for it. This time, perhaps I was.

I was still contemplating this when Zaalbar moaned and stated. "I will follow Phoenix Star, wherever she goes. I honor my lifedebt to her and I will honor it till either she or I fall into the Shadowlands."

Carth and Canderous frowned and I chuckled. "Zaalbar is in this for the long haul. He's following the lifedebt."

Mission nodded. "And wherever Zaalbar goes I go. So looks like you're stuck with us."

Bastila nodded. "Very well. Carth Onasi, set a course for Tatooine."

Carth nodded and went up to the cockpit. I followed him.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Just as I had figured, the Jedi had assigned Phoenix to go after the Star Maps. This wasn't normal, not normal at all. Yet, I wasn't about to let Phoenix go into this crazy mission on her own. I had to protect her. Although, I wasn't even sure how I was going to protect her. She's a damn Jedi and she seemed fully able to protect herself. She followed me into the cockpit as I quietly went through the start up procedure for the Hawk. She plopped down into the co-pilot seat.

"I'll help manage the hyperdrive calculation. I've been to Tatooine before."

I nodded and the engines started to heat up. She frowned. "Carth what's the matter? Talk to me!"

I sighed. "I feel helpless, Phoenix. I am no Jedi. This is a suicide mission, plain and simple. We should have the backing of the Republic fleet and the Jedi should have sent you knights and masters with you."

She gave a long drawn out sigh. "I mentioned that to the Masters, Carth. If we showed any sign of strength it will only highlight that we are on a mission against Malak. I agree with you, this is a suicide mission. Yet...we don't exactly have much of a choice. It's just one of those things. We are damned if we do and damned if we don't. Remember the last Republic ship filled with Jedi we were on, we barely managed to escape with our lives."

"Point taken Phoenix, point taken. It just seems unusual that a mission of this importance is left in the hands of three padawan. I could see Juhani and Bastila they've been Jedi for awhile. But you…. you've only trained a handful of weeks. You seem….like a savant when it comes to the Force, Phoenix. I don't know what to make of it. Don't get me wrong, I am not trying to insult you, I love you, Phoenix. I am just concerned that you're going to end up biting off more than you can chew."

She grinned a bit and then said. "What….like Malak?"

I frowned. "That's not exactly funny, Phoenix."

"Well the metal jaw and all...it is funny. At least I thought it was funny. Revan obviously thought he bit off more than he could chew."

I shook my head. "See...that's morbid, Phoenix. Where in the Force did you get such a perverse sense of humor?"

She sighed. "I am stuck with a bunch of people who lack any sort of humor at all. Bastila can't take my teasing. You….well you manage; although right now...you didn't think that was funny. Mission, well for a fourteen year standard, at least she knows how to joke. Canderous is too serious. I don't know Juhani well enough to know how she is. Zaalbar is a wookiee so any jokes I make get lost in translation to Shyriiwook. T3 is a droid, so I can't really joke in front of him, he takes things way too literally."

I sent out a response to Garang Space port and to the Jedi in control of the airspace around the Enclave to make sure they were aware of our departure and to allow clearance. I sighed and shook my head. "I know you must have had a traumatic life Phoenix that the only way you deal with it is to joke and tease. Yet….sometimes your puns and jokes they come at the wrong time."

She frowned. "I disagree Republic, they come at exactly the right time. Humor is the only weapon that cuts sharper than a lightsaber. I am who I am so don't expect me to give it up, you stuffy headed Republic."

I sighed. "I suppose so….but I still love you, even though your humor seems a bit iffy at times." The comm system chimed and I got the response I needed. The Enclave and Garang had allowed clearance. The Hawk shook as I slowly took her up and we began to break atmosphere.

She smiled and then said. "Oh and don't worry about me and Canderous. I think he sees me as a daughter."

I shook my head. "A daughter. I know how he stares at you Phoenix. He worships the ground you walk on. That's not….normal."

She laughed. "You're imagining things, Republic. My own father. He doted on me like I was a princess. You've only had a son, did you dote on him?"

I frowned. "It's been so long ago. I can't even remember how I treated Dustil. I thought I was a loving and caring enough father, and yea, I guess I doted on him. Yet, I was gone so much."

I sighed. "I probably should have spent more time than I should. If I had only knew what was going to happen to Telos. I would have spent a lifetime trying to make it up to him."

She nodded. "Well parents dote on their children. Mine did. Not sure about, Bastila. I should ask her. Mission doesn't remember her family except her brother. Zaalbar….I am not sure how Wookiees see family either. Juhani….well I don't know about her either. Canderous….well his parents are probably dead. They probably died in honorable combat, knowing Mandalorians. Anyway, I think you're misreading Canderous's intentions."

Stars began to appear in the cockpit window of the Hawk and Phoenix began to run the hyperspeed coordinates for Tatooine.

"Perhaps I am, but I can't help it. I am possessive of my loved ones and I already lost my wife and son. and I am not going to lose you, Phoenix. I love you way too much to let anything happen to you."

"Great….I get the jealous boyfriend routine, as long as you don't take it too far, Republic. I am a Jedi, you know."

I laughed. "Yea, I think the lightsabers give it away."

She chuckled. "It does, doesn't it."

The navicomputer beeped off and she punched in the coordinates and the ship lurched forward as the hyperspeed jump took us away from Dantooine.

 **~0o0~**

A/N: All my followers/readers should re-read Chapter 25 or listed chapter 26. I retconned some Dark Jedi into the chapter with the chapter with Calo Nord as Ether convinced me in one of my reviews that Calo maybe a badass but...he wouldn't go after a Sith Lord and Jedi in the same fashion. So I added a bit more to the plot in the chapter. Plus two very interesting Dark Jedi OCs. They will be featuring a lot more in the next chapters so...I do advise reading the chapter where they have been added. I also may not be updating as much as I use to. I just got hired for a new job and still getting use to my new schedule and all. I only updated really quickly because...I was unemployed and had a lot of time on my hands. Anyway..hope you enjoyed the chapter.


	42. Ch 41: Leviathan: Among the Dark Ones

**Chapter 41: Leviathan: Among the Dark Ones**

 **:: A few Weeks Earlier::**

 **~Omni Khan~**

Taris was a disaster and I kept reliving in my mind Revan's escape from our grasp. Rama had been right. Despite the fact that I could sense Lord Revan, the woman we had tried to obtain from Taris was no longer the Revan I knew. My heart cracked within me, how could Revan not be Revan? Rama and I collected the pathetic unconscious bounty hunter and we managed to get back to the Leviathan. I disliked bringing the bounty hunter back. However, Admiral Karath had mentioned that he was part of his plans so we brought him with us. Informing Admiral Karath about this horrible state of affairs, I left to Rama. I preferred less words and more actions and Rama was in a foul mood. She kept grumbling that we were going to end up killed by Malak. I laughed. "Let Malak try."

She shook her head. "You're spaced in the head, Omni. You honestly think that you can face Malak on your own. The only one who compares in strength to Malak is...well her mind has been fracked all to hell either by Malak, the Jedi, or both."

We entered the admiral's private chambers and I dumped Calo Nord onto the floor. He groaned as he slowly began to revive. He had blood from a few cuts and his armor was dented.

I turned to Rama. "What do you think we should do with….him?"

Rama looked thoughtful. "Maybe there is a way we can salvage this."

I snorted. "How? Tell 'Admiral Force-blind' that his mistress has been mind-fracked by the fracking Jedi?"

* * *

 **~Rama Yaktal~**

I looked thoughtful at Omni, my mind already working on how to salvage our misfortune. Admiral Force-blind? I laughed, I had no idea that Omni could or even possessed the wit to crack a joke. It seemed out of character for him. He usually was very serious in nature and preferred combat. If he had been older, he would have probably joined Revan on the crusade against the Mandalorians. However, Omni had only been an apprentice with the Jedi at that time.

Perhaps the joke was Lord Revan's personality rubbing off on him. Omni did seem to hold favor with Revan, but that was probably because Revan liked Echani martial arts and there were few Echani that Revan could practice her skills with. I wondered if Revan had converted the Echani Jedi simply to have a sparring partner. I would not have put it past Revan to do so. It also might explain Omni's subservient devotion to Revan, Omni seemed to have been conditioned to be nothing more than mere chattel to Revan. Although, Omni would probably disagree with that assessment. Such a thought, made me pity the Echani. He would have probably been better off if Revan had not had found him in the first place. His slavish devotion was abnormal for a Sith. Even my pity for him was a weakness, I should be harder, like obsidian and feel nothing. A Sith's feelings were like vibrodaggers, show them and you give an enemy the weapon to plunge and kill you with.

"Of course not, our lives depend on telling him that Revan is still..the Dark Lord we know. Admiral Karath won't be pleased we failed our mission. He's likely to turn us over to Malak and have us both killed in the process. I just have to come up with a convenient re-invention of the truth on how Revan managed to slip through our fingers. I say we blame it on Malak. If Karath is so willing to betray Malak, putting blame on Malak should be easy and keep us from Malak's shadow. He did fire on the planet when we were fighting with Bastila and we barely managed to escape that gundark pit."

Omni scowled. "What about Calo Nord? He's likely to blab to the admiral that Revan isn't….herself."

I bent down and looked at Calo and I chuckled. "He's still a Force-blind bounty hunter and his memory is a malleable thing. We can always alter his perception of events."

I grabbed the bounty hunter by his head and my hands rested calmly on the side of his head. I could have done this without the physical touch, but doing so made the connection quicker. He still was half-conscious and half-unconscious and I rifled through his memory. It would have been fun to frack his mind and make him a sniveling half-wit. Yet, Admiral Karath would have noticed it and Admiral Karath could turn against us if we weren't careful. He could report that we were loyal to Revan and have Malak kill us. The joys of being in the Sith, I couldn't trust anyone, save myself. I could only partially trust Omni. Omni's loyalty to Revan was the only thing that kept us allied together. Omni was useful, and trying to explain to Karath a dead Echani wouldn't go well for me. There was also the fact that Omni was more skilled in combat than I was. My strength lay in manipulating the Force in such a way I could deceive and mess with people's minds. Something Lord Revan liked immensely, thinking about that made me realize that I did miss the Dark Lord. However, I think Omni and Admiral Karath missed her more.

I found the memory of Revan within Calo's mind, ahhh she was calling herself Phoenix Star, that was interesting. Calo's mistake was thinking Revan was still the Dark Lord. How could I alter this to our own benefit? Or should I? It was Calo's error. Calo was over confident and thought he could go up against Revan, now that she was considered Force-blind. Even damaged, Revan's force of will still remained, even Force blind, she could have killed him. Calo was a fool, for his error, he should die. He had forced Admiral Karath to drag us out of stasis. If Calo had spent more time learning about Revan and that she had been damaged, then Omni and I wouldn't be in this mess.

Let him think he had fought Revan this first time and brag that he had fought and survived the encounter. I dug deeper into Calo's mind. He had dealt with the person who was truly Phoenix Star. This was easy….merge Revan with the real Phoenix Star, which he had killed and Calo would go willingly off to his death. He would not live down the shame that Phoenix Star had escaped from death...two times already. The real Phoenix Star was apparently Force blind. Yes….of course….Revan thought she was Force blind. This was amusing, the memories. I knew what I had to do. I combined the memories and added compulsion to it. Revan is Phoenix Star. Go after her, bring her down for surviving from your last attempt on her life. Tell Karath that Revan was playing a game, after all Revan is all about manipulations and deceit. Calo being the arrogant bounty hunter that he is would fully go along with the compulsion. I grinned as I finished the compulsion and Calo would go proudly to his death. He deserved it for screwing up big time. I put Calo back down on the floor.

I kicked him. "Get up….the admiral will be coming soon."

Calo got up his blasters drawn. "Kick me again, Dark Jedi and I will kill you where you stand."

I rolled my eyes, was this guy fracking nuts? Either that or he didn't want to appear weak. I could respect that, no sentient wanted to appear weak, even though his choice of not appearing weak could be considered brainless. I smirked. "You're welcome to try….Calo Nord. I guarantee you won't get very far. I could…." I chuckled. "Force persuade you to kill your self."

He glared. "You wouldn't dare."

"You wouldn't know if I did and by then it will be too late."

Omni started laughing, he had seen me playing with Nord's mind.

Calo glared. "I came through with my end of the bargain, I brought you to Revan and helped you to fight and survive that attack. I want my pay."

Omni snickered. "Sure bounty hunter, sure….whatever you say."

I laughed and winked at Omni, my manipulation had worked perfectly.

"That isn't up to me, that will be up to Admiral Karath. He has been alerted to our return. He will decide whether you are paid or not or even if your work is done, bounty hunter. Try and leave now and I will kill you."

Calo Nord snorted. "Try….and threaten me….Rama Yaktal and I will kill you. You maybe a Dark Jedi, but you are only a Dark Jedi and even Jedi, Dark or Light have their weaknesses."

I laughed. "Do not test me, bounty hunter our paths may still be together. Hate me if you wish, it gives you strength but perhaps we will fight together once more."

He said coldly. "For a Dark Jedi, you sound like a hunter."

"To be a user of the Force makes one powerful and greater than most creatures. I am a hunter of those lesser than me, it is part of Jedi be they light or dark, the Jedi deny it but the Sith know this is true. Yet, enough talk, bounty hunter. If the Force wills it, we will fight together."

* * *

 **~Saul Karath~**

I had managed to manipulate the records regarding Rama and Omni's return, but I cursed the fact that the two Dark Jedi came back to the Leviathan not just on their own but with Calo Nord. They should have succeeded but instead they had failed. They had come back when they should have fled for their lives. Yet, the danger existed that they could inform Malak that I had betrayed him. They came back because...they knew this, they also knew that I could betray them. So betrayal runs full circle, this was the way of the Sith. In many respects, I envied Carth Onasi for his unwavering support to the Republic, as matters of trust and integrity were better served in the way one lived their life. Here I had to look over my shoulder, waiting for the vibrodagger in my back or in my chest or even something worst.

Malak liked cruel and grisly deaths, whereas when Revan killed someone it was done with a sense of style and finesse. She would say simply, _death is an art form all it's own._ She preferred clean precise deaths over wanton slaughter; even her own personal assassination droid HK-47 was programmed by her in the same manner to look at death as an art form. However, It was indeed a pity that the Republic had to be so weak that even minor things like trust and integrity didn't matter in the grand scheme of things. In the end, I believed in Revan more than Malak. We needed her back; if the Sith were to survive.

Betraying Malak would be doing the Sith a favor, the Sith needed a leader who was able to think of the galaxy after conquering it, not having the galaxy become a graveyard after all had been done to it. Malak's style of attack was getting more and more erratic lately. However, I still needed to tread carefully, I could not afford having Dark Jedi betray me to Malak even if they were considered loyal to Revan. The Dark Side of the Force was fickle and it's practitioners were fickle. They saw betrayal as a way leading to power. As for keeping myself in power I conveniently executed Commander Zhan and Ensign Yan to keep any rumors regarding Revan to spread through the ranks. All I needed was the commander and a snot nosed ensign to gossip about Revan and that gossip get up to Malak. The Sith were like hungry tu'kata hounds; they would lick up blood if any blood was seen. Commander Zhan and Ensign Yan's deaths served to keep me in power.

I entered my private chambers and turned to the Dark Jedi. "Tell me one good reason why I shouldn't inform Malak of your existence."

Rama snorted. "Admiral Karath, we couldn't get to Revan it was all due to Malak's planetary bombardment. It's Malak fault not ours that Bastila and Revan got away."

I glared at her, I could not show fear or even think or feel fear. She was a Force user. Revan had enough presence of mind to teach me how to resist Force usage. My thoughts turned to lust, base indignities, and perverted desires. Most of those involved me and Revan alone.

Rama chuckled. "Really Admiral…..if I honestly wanted to know what you and Lord Revan did on your own time. I'd have plucked it from you earlier. I get the idea, you don't want me to...pick your mind."

I snorted. "Then I advise you to stay out of it. My mind is my own affair, Rama Yaktal."

I turned to Omni Khan. "And what is your excuse, Echani?"

Omni said calmly. "I serve Lord Revan, Admiral Karath. I accept failure...if it furthers your own design. If not then I will serve you however you wish. Yet….I do not believe you will betray us to Malak and have him kill us, for all we will do is plant doubt of your loyalty. Rama and I without question will tell Malak of your betrayal. You are bound as we are in a triple knot. Our deaths do not serve you, Admiral, in fact our deaths will only lead to your own death."

The damn infernal Echani was right. His loyalty to Revan was commendable if not a bit mentally unstable in nature. I wondered idly what Revan had done to this man to make him sound like a damn loyal droid. His breaking must have been astounding. I wish I had been there to see what Revan had done to this warrior of the Echani. However, his mind still had an astute presence to remind me that we were bound tightly.

I looked at Calo Nord. "Breathe one word about this to Malak and…." I paused, "in fact you won't even get that far."

I pulled out my blaster and put it close to his head and prepared to kill him right then and there.

Calo Nord smiled and then laughed in spite of my threat. "Revan was toying with us, Admira Karath. She can still be rescued if that's what you wish. She needs to be separated from Carth Onasi and Bastila Shan. They were holding her 'hostage'."

I looked at Rama. "Is this true?"

She nodded. "Oh yes….Admiral Karath. Bastila was preventing us at every turn to get to Revan. Revan was toying with us. I predict she wanted us to kill Bastila and Carth Onasi, so she played hard to get. She was testing us on our loyalty."

I sighed. "Yes, Revan is….clever like that. She wants us to kill Bastila, although I thought her last wishes were to take her alive."

Rama shrugged. "Alive, dead….does it matter, Admiral Karath? Revan is testing us. Use her test…and prove your worth to her. Send Calo after her and….Omni and I will deal with Bastila and Carth Onasi."

I looked thoughtful. "Yes….I suppose this would work. Although how do I….prevent….Calo..."

Rama grinned. "Easy…."

She raised her hand and said firmly to the bounty hunter. "You will say nothing about our betrayal….to Malak."

Calo eyes glassed over and he said. "I will...no….I will not..."

Rama's eyes grew even more intense. "YOU WILL SAY NOTHING….TO MALAK OF OUR BETRAYAL."

"I will….say…."

Rama said firmly once again. "YOU WILL SAY NOTHING...IF YOU DO...YOUR INNARDS WILL BURN AND THE PAIN WILL BE SO INTENSE….YOUR MIND WILL BELIEVE YOU ARE DYING. IF YOU STILL TELL AND ENDURE THE PAIN THEN….YOUR BRAIN WILL TELL YOUR HEART TO STOP BEATING AND YOU WILL DIE."

Calo's eyes went wide and then went back to normal. "I will say nothing to Malak."

I shivered. Force compulsion. One of those powers I detested. Apparently, Rama had a very strong and powerful talent for it. I hoped she didn't get any ideas on using it against me. I've heard stories from Lord Revan how she had used compulsion to get prisoners to self mutilate themselves. She would laugh about how pathetically weak minded they were. Those who resisted, she would wean out for their Force usage and break to become Dark Jedi. It was an efficient way to get strong converts to your cause. I loved her, she was a brilliant woman, her cold passion from the Dark Side was delightfully sadistic and that in it's own way was beautiful.

Rama smiled at me. "Are you satisfied, Admiral Karath?"

I scratched the stubble of my beard. "Hmm….how do we test this?"

Rama grinned. "Order him to tell Lord Malak of our betrayal."

I nodded. "Of course."

I turned to Calo Nord. "Go tell Malak that we have betrayed him."

He snorted. "Why should I? Since it appears if I do you'll kill me or space me out an airlock and if you present me to Malak he's likely to twist me just as badly as your fracking Dark Jedi have done."

I frowned and looked at Rama. She shrugged. "That isn't how I thought this would work, but I suppose it will suffice. Yet..no one has been able to resist my charms, Admiral Karath. My compulsion is effective. Effective enough on a strong willed bounty hunter.

"I hope you're right and I hope Malak doesn't recognize the compulsion either."

Rama chuckled. "I never met Malak, Admiral Karath. Revan kept me and Omni hidden out of Malak's sight and prying gaze. I suspect that Revan suspected her apprentice would try and betray her and prepared for it as best as she could. Omni and I, are proof of her plans. Although…." Rama looked as if she was contemplating something.

"Although what?"

She sighed. "Revan cannot have predicted everything, Admiral Karath. If she did, she wouldn't have been nearly killed and caught by the Jedi and the Republic in the first place. I doubt Malak will be able to recognize the essence of my power. Omni and I are what some would call wild Pazaak cards. Yet….I predict that you cannot hide everything from Malak, Admiral Karath nor should you try. Let him know that Revan is alive. He'll be much more distracted over Revan's survival than betrayal from us. He'll grow careless."

Omni snorted. "Malak is a coward. He couldn't even face his master in proper combat. Even Echani know the honor of facing one in proper combat. Malak robbed Revan of her right of combat. He stole her battle, cheapened it. I will never respect him and I am surprised that most of the Sith and Dark Jedi follow him. If they honored the right of combat, as the Sith are supposed to, then all would say that Malak's claim to be a Dark Lord is very shaky at best.

I shook my head. "Omni, I don't think Darth Malak, predicted that Lord Revan would have survived his attack. Malak's tactic may have been cowardly but the Sith follow him regardless. I will let Malak know about Revan's survival." I looked at Calo Nord. "And you will follow me...bounty hunter. You are an eye witness to Revan's survival. Malak will reward you and pay you handsomely, if it's money you wish to receive you will get it. You will receive more if you….decide to hunt her or Bastila."

I knew Revan, she would crush Calo. Yet getting rid of this bounty hunter was worth it. He was a loose end. I had a feeling that Rama had messed with his mind, more than what I had requested.

The bounty hunter proceeded to walk with me and we exited my chambers and we walked down the hallways of my ship.

Calo's eyes widened with greed. "Just how many credits are we talking about?"

I smiled. Greed, a powerful tool, Revan would have said. She detested its corruption in the Republic and even in the Sith. If she found anyone taking bribes or accepting money in such a way she would have killed them right off. However, she also recognized it as a powerful tool and used it against those not sworn to the Sith as a way to garner favor and support. "More than you can imagine, bounty hunter. Enough that you could retire from the life you lead."

"Billions?"

I laughed. "And what would a bounty hunter do with the wealth of a world?"

Calo chuckled. "I am not without ambition, Admiral Karath. Like you Sith, I also wish conquest and my own private sanctuary."

I raised an eyebrow. "I see… well we cannot give you billions. There is a war going on, Calo Nord but...I can offer you a nice tidy sum from Lord Malak. He will give you a lot of credits to either capture or eliminate Bastila and Revan."

He frowned. "I thought you wanted both alive."

"I serve both sides when it serves my interest, Calo Nord. Manipulating and pitting one side against the other is a good way to get what I want in the end."

Little did Calo Nord know that I was manipulating him because I wanted him dead. Sending him on a fools errand such as this, would more than likely end in his death. I was only too glad to get rid of him. Revan would kill him, she hated bounty hunters and only used them as a final resort.

"You learned that from Revan, didn't you?"

"It served her well during the Mandalorian wars, bounty hunter. It served her well till….till Malak betrayed her. Perhaps even Malak learned this lesson from her. He pitted the Jedi against her in a ploy to kill her. A Sith Lord has to play this game well, Calo Nord. They always must be three or perhaps even seven or more steps ahead. Revan knew this and it is true that what I know of these things, I learned from her."

Calo Nord looked at me. "You're a complicated man, Admiral Karath. I am not sure if I should like you or hate you."

I laughed. "I am so glad that I amuse you, Calo Nord. Yet, we are not friends, bounty hunter. Our relationship is purely professional, so do not forget it. I could have you shot down and killed for failing to retrieve Revan."

"I could still tell Malak….your plans to betray him."

I stopped in mid-step.

He laughed. "Did you honestly think that your vaunted little Dark Jedi pet could mind frack me?"

I paused. Greed, that was the only thing I knew would work. "How much to buy your silence?"

He smiled. "Now you're talking Admiral."

"I want three million credits. That should be ample enough."

"Half now….the other half when you complete your mission."

"One point five millions credits, fair enough." He put his hand out. I begrudgingly took it and shook his hand. Now the good question was where was I going to get one point five million credits?

I paused in thought and then smiled, Revan had a considerable fortune squirreled away that she never really saw the point in using. She may have forsaken the Jedi, but she still held the high minded ideal that material wealth was worthless. Considering Revan Ravenheart's background, that was an abnormality. She had been born to wealth but rejected it so easily. She hated wealth and she hated pomp and circumstance. Ironically, the Mandalorian wars had forced her into a background she didn't want. It was understandable that Revan went out of her way to convince the galaxy she was a man and only went by her first name. I just had to contact the Onderonian bank that the Ravenheart family had and get the funds I needed.

"Also I expect to be paid for this mission as well, not just for my silence."

I felt like taking my blaster and killing him now. This damn bounty hunter was getting too damn greedy for his own good. It's a good thing, I had managed to get him to agree to half payment. I couldn't wait for Revan to kill this gutless contemptible hutt. "Malak will pay you. As for the one point five million. I must contact my sources for that. Do not worry, Calo Nord, you will get paid your considerable fee for your assistance."

* * *

 **~Malak~**

One freighter had gotten away and with it, I could feel that my plans in killing Bastila had gone wrong. Circuitry exploded around me as the Force fueled my anger and my rage around me.

 _"Temper, temper, Malak. You need to learn control."_

I scowled, damn it all my old Master haunted me, even though she was dead.

 _"We are Sith, Master. Control is a Jedi trait."_

 _She laughed. "I see, so you would forsake even the basics of the Force because you somehow think you're above the Jedi. The Jedi are still ruthless killers, even though they profess passivity and pacifism in the process of combat. The difference between us and them is as thin as a slender blade. What good is the power of the Dark Side if you can't control the manner in how and where you direct it? You must have control Malak, lashing out blindly will have the Jedi or others at your throat, one of these days. It would seriously annoy me to no end that I would have to swoop in and save your pathetic incompetent hide. Perhaps it is time to seal this lesson….apprentice."_

 _The Force swirled around her and agony filled me as Revan sealed her maxims and lessons with pain. The lightening went through my body and through my implant. At times, her comments reminded me of the damn Jedi, but she reinforced them with the cold and forceful will of a Sith Lord. My body wracked with pain and I was able to look up. She wore her mask, but I could sense the satisfaction flowing from her, she was enjoying this. Damn her!_

Argh…..damn her lessons! They still grated and whispered inside my head. I hated her. I reached out with the Force and the first person who crossed my path began to gag.

The Admiral fell to the floor. "L...or...d Ma...lak….."

I released my hold upon him. I scowled at him. "Admiral...I did NOT summon you. If you have no knowledge to help me then leave me."

Admiral Karath rubbed his neck, breathed and then said calmly. "Lord Malak. Bastila managed to escape due to the efforts of Carth Onasi, a decorated war hero of the Republic. He was honored during the Mandalorian Wars for his bravery."

I raised an eyebrow. "You know this man?"

"When I was loyal to the Republic, yes. He served under me. I considered him like a son to me. I taught him everything he knew."

"Then you taught him too well. Where did you get this information, Admiral?"

"An eyewitness Lord Malak!"

I watched as Admiral Karath waved a man on and a man stepped forward. "Calo Nord, a bounty hunter, was there when Bastila and Carth escaped the planet. Apparently they left him for dead."

If I could smile, I would, but damn my old Master had taken even that ability from me. "You survived an encounter from a Jedi and a war hero. It's a wonder you are here."

"I am hard to kill...Lord Malak."

"Calo has agreed to help us capture….Bastila, for a very hefty fee of course. But I assure you he is well worth the price. His reputation as a bounty hunter is well earned."

"Her companions are nothing to me, Calo – but I desire the young Jedi taken alive if at all possible."

Karath suddenly interjected. "Lord Malak, forgive me. There is something else. May we have a private audience away from the ears of these ordinary common soldiers."

I raised an eyebrow. "I trust you are not wasting my time, Admiral Karath."

"I promise you, you will be VERY interested in what Calo has to tell you about Bastila's other companions, Lord Malak."

 **~o0o~**

The Force exploded around me. Panels sparked and died around me as the news assaulted my ears. Revan was alive, but not only that she was aiding the damn Jedi, according to Calo and Admiral Karath. It all began to make sense. Nasi, Nix. Of course. Nasi was Carth Onasi and Nix was Phoenix, a name my master was using. Damn her! Her loyalty was fickle as ever. Yet….with her alive….maybe that was why her lessons still grated in my ears, she wasn't properly dead.

Ever since I had fired on the bridge of her warship, __Raven's Pride__ _,_ her voice occasionally echoed through my head. I thought her spirit had decided to haunt me but now I was certain that she managed to extend her presence to me through the Force to torment me even more.

"I want her dead….do you hear me? Dead….bring me back her corpse, Calo Nord."

I would raise the appropriate Sith rituals and make sure she didn't haunt me as a spirit. I would send her soul into oblivion so she couldn't haunt me. I needed her body to complete the ritual.

Calo Nord bowed. "One more thing….Lord Malak."

"Yes."

"Admiral Karath….he...is…."

The bounty hunter stuttered and I waited. His eyes watered and I frowned. "Well…."

"Admiral Karath promised me that you would pay me well for doing so.

"Of course, your fee. I will pay you two million credits, to get rid of Revan and one million for Bastila, alive, due at the end of your assignment."

Calo's eyes fixated at the idea of credits. Of course, damn these bounty hunters and their infernal desire for money. "Now go….do not come back if you can't accomplish your task."

The bounty hunter looked at me about to protest, no doubt he wanted some of his pay now. I glared at him and the Force rumbled within me, it's sound coming forward in an audible rumble. Calo must have thought better of asking me and he said calmly. "Yes, Lord Malak."

He walked out of my chamber doors.

I turned towards Admiral Karath. "Admiral….there is a good chance that my master has betrayed her secrets to the Jedi. Seeing how she walks willingly with them now. How long will it take to gather the armada and prepare a strike against Dantooine?"

Admiral Karath looked thoughtful. "The Jedi have their Enclave there. Do you wish a ground assault as well as an orbital bombardment?"

"Does it matter? I don't care how you get rid of Dantooine, just raze it to the ground. The Jedi are of little consequence to me. If they die they die. Send some of the Dark Jedi and some marauders to deal with them after our initial assault. Our primary concern is that the Rakatan ruins must be destroyed. Revan may have tried to sabotage the map during our first visit but that's not good enough. Only it's dead twisted metal will be enough to keep the Jedi from learning our secrets."

Admiral Karath sighed. "It will take some time to prep the armada for the strike, Lord Malak. Plus calling the Dark factions from across our Empire. Yet….your will will be carried out, Lord Malak."

I nodded. "Good. You are dismissed, Admiral Karath." The admiral walked out of my chambers.

I sighed. "Soon my Master….you will be completely and utterly dead and your damn influence will be scourged from my brain."

Her laughter filled my ears. _Don't count on it….Malak. You think a Sith ritual will get rid of me that easily. You really are a fool._

Damn her. How could she still influence me? How?

"I will still purge my mind of you, Master."

Laughter filled my head. _Be careful you don't purge your own mind in the process, apprentice….I've seen broken Jedi that looked better than you._

Argh! Why won't she leave me alone? Was it guilt for trying to kill her? Was it our old friendship plaguing me? I wanted more from her. Yet, she always defied me. She did not love me. She said my blood was too common. Damn her and her Onderonian high rank! She flaunted it all the time at me and used it as an excuse because she ended up taking Liam Mandrel and Admiral Karath to her bed. Damn her. Why wouldn't she let me possess her?

 _I am not an item to possess…..apprentice. I never was. Your common blood has always been too common. Liam and Saul proved themselves above their blood. You, however….apprentice….are only meant to serve me. Serve me or die._

Memory…..damn her….she haunts my past and my present. Damn her! I don't know what is real anymore because of her.

* * *

 **~Saul Karath~**

Rama had been right. Malak was consumed by wanting Revan dead. He seemed agitated, more so than normal. Course, with Lord Malak that was hard to say. He was always agitated. He was insane. We needed Revan back. Calo tried to betray me….but apparently Rama's manipulation still held sway. I glared at the bounty hunter.

"I will give you five hundred thousand credits, bounty hunter and another five hundred thousand when you return. It is for your innovative style in trying to pretend that Rama hadn't 'mind fracked' you."

Calo Nord glared at me but then he laughed. "It was worth a try, Admiral Karath. I thought I could resist….it. I wanted to see if I could. It was foolish to try and do so, but as I said, I thought I could resist it. But apparently I can't resist your Dark Jedi pet. Phoenix Star will die….once more."

His words chilled me. "I want her alive…."

He grinned. "Then pay me more than what Malak offered for her death. Five million credits…..."

"Four million, Calo Nord. Not a cred more and as we agreed to previously. Half now. Half later when you bring her to Malachor V. I will also be sending Rama and Omni with you, to guarantee your success."

The bounty hunter sighed and rolled his eyes when I mentioned I would be sending the two Dark Jedi with him. He paused a moment and then said. "Deal."

* * *

A/N: So just to note. I am still tweaking things as they come up to my attention. Chapters 27-33 have had some changes to them. Some additional dialogue and thought with Phoenix and the Jedi Masters. Some additional conversation with Canderous, Carth and Phoenix in some other chapters. Phoenix acting a bit more like a "Jedi pawn" in the training chapters and Carth going nuts over it. A bit more of an ominous encounter with the ruins the first time around. Thanks really go to Ether for pointing out some flaws in things. On to Tatooine and I do plan on mixing things up really well on Tatooine. I will be deviating from the game plot in large ways so look for that when I get the Tatooine chapters up.


	43. Chapter 42: And the Galaxy Becomes Aware

**Chapter 42: And the Galaxy Becomes Aware….**

 **~Minden Ravenheart~**

 **::Onderon::**

I glared at the image of the man who appeared on my transmission screen. "How dare you contact me. I told you my daughter is dead to me and dead to the Ravenheart family. I want nothing to do with you. Onderon has had enough of Sith Lords, Jedi, and Mandalorians. You disgust me….Admiral Karath."

The Admiral said calmly. "I need your wealth to help your daughter. She's not as dead as the Republic or Malak has claimed. Yet, she's in the hands of the Jedi and the Republic. I have to extract her and that's not exactly cheap."

"How dare you use her as a knife to plunge into my heart!"

I loved my little Rev, she was such an inquisitive child. She took to drexl, at such a young age. She honored our beast rider heritage, and then the damn Republic and the Jedi came and made us a Republic planet. The Jedi came to our estate and took her away from me. Damn Master Vandar and Master Kavar saying she was Force sensitive and ripping her away from the heart of her family. Damn them! Yet, my little girl, my little Rev, went solemnly and quietly with the Jedi. She said she wanted to go. They took her and a few commoners.

I glared at the admiral. "The galaxy would have been a better place if Onderon had never became part of the Republic. Revan would have never become a Sith Lord like Freedon Nadd and Exar Kun. Our ancestors fought against such filth and the thought that my precious Rev…."

The admiral sighed. "I am sorry to upset you….Lord Ravenheart. Galactic politics aside, you surely can't turn your back on your daughter."

I felt pained. "Damn it…." I paused. Yelling out that my daughter, my child, was dead all the time had not helped me, in fact it only made the pain I felt in my heart worse.

"Even though it pains me….I love my daughter. Dark Side be damned…..I'd sell my soul to keep her safe." I turned to Admiral Karath. "How much do you need?"

"Four million credits."

"What? The Ravenheart family is…."

"Your heritage puts you close to the royal family….Lord Ravenheart. Surely four million credits is a small pinch to you and what price can you put on family?"

I paused, the damn Sith admiral was right. I had tried to turn my back on my little Rev. I tried because Revan being a Sith Lord was an insult, and a shame to our heritage. When she came back to the Republic claiming herself as Darth Revan, I publicly renounced her in front of the council of Onderonian nobles, of course, most of the nobles thought that my daughter was a son. Revan had always been sort of a tomboy. Most of the beast riders were men and Revan insisted that one day she would ride drexl like the boys and men around Onderon. Such dreams never came true for Revan. Like most children, she wanted to be several things, but that was before the Jedi came and filled her mind with nonsense about how noble and great the Jedi were and she turned from her desire to be a beast rider. She then wanted to be a Jedi.

However, it did not matter to me, what the nobles thought. I was angry and the nobles saying my daughter was a son, made the pain less. I could imagine that they were talking about a person I didn't know and that my little Rev was still the sweet innocent girl I loved, rather than the horrible reality that my daughter was a Dark Sider, a Sith like Freedon Nadd. I disowned her, or at least I tried to disown her. She still had a trust that I managed, I wouldn't allow her access to it, but I kept it in hopes, well…maybe it was foolish, but I kept hoping she would remember what happened to our ancestors. We had fought against Freedon Nadd and the Naddists, our ancestors had been exiled for being against him. I hoped she would remember and turn against all that we had fought against.

The only damn noble that stuck his nose in where he shouldn't have been was our cousin General Vaklu. He seemed to think, that having a Dark Lord on Onderon's side would be a good thing. He kept urging me to contact my Revan and have her come and liberate Onderon from the foul Republic. Bah! Did he not remember our history with Freedon Nadd? I sure as hell did. Yet, Vaklu seemed to be of the same mindset as I was; I had no love for the Republic or even for the Jedi. They had ruined my poor little Rev.

Revan should have known better, at least I thought she did. She went to war against the Mandalorians to protect the Republic and Onderon. She was a patriot to us all on Onderon. She tried to distance herself from her noble ties during the war even to the point of renouncing her Ravenheart family name and going simply by the name Revan and claiming herself as a man. Although I am sure her reasons were many for doing this. However, I knew. After all a father knows his daughter, that in her own way she was trying to protect us from the backlash of war. If the Mandalorians knew an Onderonian Jedi was related to the royal family and was from a noble family there would have been retribution. The Mandalorians are very much into clan and family. Knowing the Mandalorians, they would have struck hard against the Ravenheart family hoping to get a response from Revan. As it was, Revan had spared us from that hardship and protected us from the Mandalorians' wrath. So thinking about it I did owe a lot to my wayward daughter.

I gave a long painful sigh. "It will take some time but I will have your money within the hour, Admiral Karath."

He bowed before me. "Thank you Lord Ravenheart. You have been able to prove that co-existence between enlightened individuals can exist."

I snorted. "I am not doing this for the Sith or for the Republic, Admiral Karath. I am doing it for the love of my daughter, Revan. If the Sith ever come back to Onderon….we will fight you. We've had enough of the Sith on Onderon."

The Admiral nodded. "I will let Revan know what you have done, Lord Ravenheart. I will tell her to leave Onderon alone. She's not heartless. For what its worth, she spoke very fondly of you."

I smiled wanly, nodded, and ended the transmission.

* * *

 **~Jastra Fey'lya~**

 **::Republic Intelligence Listening post 361::**

Join the intelligence part of the Fleet, Vulk said. Your bothan sneakiness will prove useful, he said. Liar, I thought. He must have been sweet talking me, he always did manage to flirt with me. He always said I was an attractive bothan female. This was the most boring posting I ever had. I spend days, weeks, on end listening to the prattle of the galaxy from billions of sentients. I craved action. What I wouldn't give to be assigned as counter-intelligence on Manaan. The Sith were there and I could have worked as a double agent. Instead I was stuck here listening to ithorian recipes being swapped. Ugh….two ithorians yammering is enough to give anyone a headache. Did you know that Bendak Starkiller met his end on Taris? Yes, Corran Kadral is staring in a new holodrama, __The Tragedy of Revan__ , He's playing Revan. I sighed, how boring.

" _I need your wealth to help your daughter. She's not as dead as the Republic or Malak has calmed. Yet, she's in the hands of the Jedi and the Republic. I have to extract her and that's not exactly cheap."_

Malak….that had my attention. I was supposed to listen for words that might help the Republic intelligence and the war effort. I had to listen to key words. Words such as Malak, Revan, Sith, Jedi. All of them got my ears twitching.

So I sat and listened. Rev? I scratched my chin fur. As in Revan? Little Rev equals Revan. This was interesting.

" _I am not doing this for the Sith or for the Republic, Admiral Karath. I am doing it for the love of my daughter, Revan. If the Sith ever come back to Onderon….we will fight you. We've had enough of the Sith on Onderon."_

Ravenheart? What does Ravenheart, a Onderon noble, have to deal with Revan? I took down notes.

" _I will let Revan know what you have done, Lord Ravenheart. I will tell her to leave Onderon alone. She's not heartless. For what its worth, she spoke very fondly of you."_

Was that right? Revan is alive. Yes, I recorded the message. Revan is alive and….daughter…..I felt as though I had been struck by lightening. Daughter! Revan is a woman! The Dark Lord of the Sith was not a man after all but a woman. I got up from my listening post. Finally…a bit of excitement for the day. I had not had any excitement for days. My next step was to give this information to my superior who would give it to his superior which would end up in the hands of Admiral Forn Dodonna.

* * *

 **~Admiral Dodonna~**

 **::Fleet HQ ~ Coruscant::**

 **::A Few Weeks Later::**

Why has Carth Onasi not reported in yet? He's supposed to report to me. I was getting worried. I had sent him a message regarding Phoenix Star and Phoenix Naberrie and no response. Did he get my message? Had he even heard it? Maybe the Sith had intercepted it. It was possible that the message didn't go through or had been intercepted.

I tried sending a message to the Ebon Hawk and all I got was silence. Nothing. The comm system must be down. I took a deep breath, perhaps the Ebon Hawk was in danger, I had to give Carth the benefit of the doubt that perhaps the comm was down to keep it and its crew safe. However, it bothered me that I had not heard from the captain in days.

A bothan, intelligence agent named Eshka Kith'fey handed me a report. I scrunched up my face as I read it. What? Revan alive. Plus the fact that Revan was not a man as intelligence had believed earlier, but a woman. I breathed tersely as I read the report. Revan Ravenheart, a Onderonian noblewoman, Jedi Knight, turned Sith Lord. The Jedi had reported Revan had been killed. There was also the fact that the Jedi had lied about the true nature of Revan. Revan was not a man but a woman. Anger filled me, the Jedi had deceived the Republic. I couldn't allow that to occur. They were no better than the Sith. I also needed to arrest Minden Ravenheart for treason. He was a Republic citizen, Onderonian or not. Damn Onderonians they seemed to have forgotten that they were part of the Republic now. Yet…. Breathe, Forn. Breathe. Don't lash out. You're suppose to be calm, poised, and disciplined. I thought about Republic intelligence on Onderon. Anti-Republic sentiment was high. I was thinking way too rashly. I wanted to claim Lord Ravenheart as revenge for his daughter's actions, yet doing so might end up with a diplomatic incident. General Vaklu would no doubt rush to the aid of Lord Ravenheart and stir up Onderionian passions against the Republic. That's all the Republic needed at the moment a planet seceding from them. Other planets might get the same idea and during this war we didn't need secessionist notions. Damn it all…..I slammed my hands on my desk. The Jedi had a lot of questions that had to be answered. I wouldn't have these damn problems if….the Jedi had done what they said they did and that was killed the Dark Lord Revan to begin with.

Why hadn't Carth….no...Forn don't get upset at Carth. He likely didn't know, but I had told him to keep his eyes peeled. What was going on with the Jedi? Why were they hiding the fact that Revan was alive? There had to be a reason why. I needed to contact Master Vandar. I had a reasonably good relationship with the strange pint sized Jedi master. I slowly opened up a secure channel to the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine requesting permission to speak with Master Vandar. I waited and waited. I had a feeling that somehow Vandar knew that I knew the Jedi had spared Revan. His delay in talking to me seemed to confirm this. However, I tried to give the Jedi master the benefit of the doubt.

Finally the master appeared on the screen. "Yes, Admiral Dodonna."

I looked firmly at the Jedi master. "You….lied to us Master Vandar or you withheld the truth from us. You do realize that could be construed as treason in the Republic."

Master Vandar's ears flattened some. "You would not give the Order a chance, admiral. Chancellor Korlath Jah was adamant that Revan face a death sentence for her crimes. He let politics, override common sense, admiral. The truth is Revan has information important to the war effort. "

"And what information is that, Master Jedi?"

"The technical information of a war machine, Admiral Dodonna. The center of where Malak and Revan are getting the ships for the Sith armada."

I sighed. "I see. So you figured that you would just do this without permission of the Republic. You know of course, I can't allow that Master Vandar. The Order walking all over the Republic can't be allowed to happen. We let the Jedi do that in the past….and we got Revan and Malak. Surely you must understand my position, Master Jedi."

Vandar said calmly. "I do, admiral. But the Jedi do not believe in executing their prisoners. Revan falls under our jurisdiction."

"And if I understand correctly, Revan forfeited her position within the Order when she left the Order to fight in the Mandalorian wars"

"Ahh but we have accepted her back into the Order, Admiral Dodonna."

"What? How could you let a Sith Lord into the Order?"

"She's not a Sith Lord any longer."

"What?"

"It is a long story, Admiral Forn Dodonna. If you have the time and patience. I suggest you listen."

"Fine, Master Jedi….I will listen."

 **~o0o~**

I took a long hard gaze at the Jedi Master. "You do realize I have to report this to the Chancellor, Master Jedi. If he recommends action against you and this….."Phoenix Star" I will have no choice but to act."

"I understand Admiral. However, I am relieved actually to tell you the truth, rather than hiding it, no matter what the consequences it brings."

"For what it's worth Master Vandar. I can understand your position and the reason why. In the long run, you are only trying to help the Republic. You are right, Chancellor Jah can only see his political term. He wants to be known as the Chancellor who brought the Sith down. It's power and position that corrupts his aim. Yet…."

I sighed. "I must follow the laws of the Republic, otherwise we would be no better than the Sith. However, if I do capture "Phoenix Star", I will return her to the Jedi, not to a military tribunal. The laws state very clearly that you have autonomy over your practitioners. Since as you state, she has no memory of who she is and that in a strange way makes her a Jedi and under your authority. I will let you and the chancellor sort this issue out on your terms."

I glanced firmly at Vandar, "You are playing a dangerous game, Master Vandar. Many people are going to want Revan Ravenheart's blood for obvious reasons. Yet, I really honestly want no part of some political wrangling because that's not my job. I am just an Admiral who is fighting to keep what's left of the Republic together. This whole affair over Revan's survival and what's to become of her, that's the job of the politicians and the Jedi, Master Vandar. I think I might be able to convince the chancellor that it's in his best interest to allow this "mission" of yours to continue. He is rather a vain man. If I can convince him that your "mission" will bring down the Sith and that it will look good politically for him. Then I can at least buy you some more time. Afterwards….well I can't honestly say what will happen afterwards. I know the chancellor, he will move all creation to get Revan tried for her crimes, even if it means formulating a law that would take away Jedi autonomy. All I can say, is that everything afterwards will be up to the Order, Revan, and the Force."

Master Vandar smiled softly. "Thank you Admiral Dodonna. You have proven yourself a true friend to the Order and the Republic."

"Don't thank me yet, Master Jedi. You better hope the Force is with you when I talk to the chancellor, because all I can say is, he's going to be as mad as a hutt without his dancing girl."

Vandar chuckled lightly and then said. "I trust the Force, Admiral Dodonna. Let us hope that it is with you."

* * *

A/N: Short chapter and yea quick update but….working out Revan's past and how the Republic finds out….yea...maybe Dodonna went a bit too easy on the Jedi. Yet, she strikes me as the more reasonable of military and Republic leaders. She understands that the Jedi are trying to help the Republic even though their actions were questionable but has to work in the framework of the Republic. She's stuck in a very difficult place.

Oh and I re-wrote a very small portion of Chapter 33 with the confrontation with Sherruk. Ether pointed out that it seemed kind of forced and looking at the chapter it seemed a bit "cheesy" so I re-wrote it to be what I think was a bit more realistic.


	44. 43:Ebon Hawk: Stars Burn Lines pt 1

**Chapter 43: Ebon Hawk: Till the Stars Burn Lines Part 1**

 **~Phoenix~**

Damn it, I hate space travel, as soon as we hit hyperspace, I started pacing like a cat. Speaking of cats, I needed to get to know Juhani. I really didn't know the Cathar all that well. Carth looked at me. "Are you okay, Phoenix?"

I sighed. "I'll be alright. I just hate space travel. Plus the fact that we are a few meters of deck and shield plating away from vacuum doesn't exactly comfort me."

He looked at me strangely. "But you said you traveled space all the time."

I laughed. "Yea, but I never said I enjoyed it. I hate space travel. I'd rather be doing something. At least I am not traveling space alone, thank the Force for that."

Carth smiled and got up out of his pilot seat, he had that kind of lusty look in his eye. "Well you want to do something…."

"Seriously Carth…..no. I think fracking the Republic pilot with Bastila around is not a good idea. Remember we have a bond."

Carth suddenly paled. "Are you saying she felt us…..ummm?"

I rolled my eyes. "Brilliant Republic. I told you days ago about the bond and you finally figured….that means…." I sighed and then patted Carth on the shoulder. "I am sorry. I should have told you. I just didn't honestly know how deep the bond went."

I then grinned. "Course if I want to…." I went towards Carth and gave him a deep very passionate kiss. He enfolded his arms around me and went with the kiss.

Sure enough I felt Bastila in my mind.: _:Phoenix….cut that out. I do not want to spend this whole trip feeling you making love to Carth.::_

.: _:Bite me….Bastila. Oh wait….you can't!::_

 _::Now you're just being mean, flouting the bond like this. Cut it out….::_

 _::Uh…..no.::_

I finished my kiss with Carth and then said: _:Okay, Bastila you win.::_

I heard Bastila give a frustrated sigh/huff in my head and I laughed and Carth frowned. "What?"

"Oh peeving off Bastila is fun. I should have done it sooner."

Carth shook his head. "Phoenix….please tell me you didn't just kiss me to mess with Bastila?"

I chuckled. "Umm yea..."

Carth shook his head. "Is this more of your twisted humor, Phoenix?"

I laughed and Carth shook his head. "Damn it woman, I am going to put you over my knee and teach you a lesson."

"Oooh is that a promise?"

"Oh no I am not even going there, sister."

"Hah….I'd love to see you try."

He grabbed me and caught me off balance and he put me over his knee and began to gently swat me on my behind.

"Ow….hey….stop it….this is prejudice against a Jedi….I protest."

Carth's eyes were filled with mirth as he gently and playfully swatted my bottom.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I don't know what was going on with Rev….Phoenix. Why was she acting so belligerent towards me? She seemed as though she was mocking me for the fact that I wouldn't have a relationship with her or was it simply her joking, mirthful nature? I wasn't sure, and that was with the bond. I felt confused and addled. Once again I didn't know what to think of her. Perhaps, it was my first impression of Revan on her flagship, that I had thought the hero of the Republic was a man. Finding out otherwise had shook my equilibrium to the core. It still didn't change the fact that I still had feelings for her. She had been a hero and villain to the Republic. I loved her or….was it that I loved the ideal she once stood for? I wasn't honestly sure. The feelings I had for her were conflicted and complex. Perhaps that is why Revan acted the way she did around me. I had lost her to Carth because of my inaction. I gave a long sigh. I wasn't even sure she felt the same about me. Sometimes I think she did and other times she acted like the biggest flirt in the cosmos. Perhaps that was an after effect of the bond.

I trudged around the ship in a bit of a muddled mood. I took a breath and ran into Phoenix. She smiled as if nothing had happened between her and Carth or the fact that she had teased and flirted with me through our bond. She caught me off balance as she said."Bastila….we should practice our skills. You, me, and Juhani. Space travel makes me itchy as hell."

I nodded. "It is wise….to keep our skills honed. Particularly you, Phoenix. You need to keep up with your studies as a padawan."

She nodded. "That's why I came to you Bastila. You're in charge of this mission and I am thinking the masters left you in charge for a reason. So I am deferring to you."

My jaw dropped, this seemed a bit out of character for Phoenix. She laughed. "You're attracting flies….Bastila. Don't act all surprised. I want to train with you. I want to perfect my knowledge and my teachings of the Jedi. You're not a master, obviously...but you're probably the closest thing I am going to get to one."

I felt perplexed. "I...I...don't know what to say."

"Say you'll help me, besides if we're going to be facing Malak or his minions it's best that I spend the time learning."

"Alright Phoenix….I'll help you. Come on let's go find Juhani."

We walked down the ship looking to find Juhani. We found her in quiet meditation in the sleeping area. "Grab your lightsaber, Juhani. Phoenix has requested we train together."

Juhani nodded.

We found our way into the garage area and Canderous grinned. "Here's a sight three Jedi women. Now that's my fantasy….course it ends with the victor and I in a bunk."

Phoenix grinned. "You naughty Mandalorian, get your mind out of the gutter."

"Well I can at least watch you three practice. I want to see Phoenix drop you all on your butts."

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Canderous…..I am not that good."

"Bah...you're being modest. You defeated Bendak Starkiller, you took down Sherruk. You are clearly the better combatant."

"Yea….and bragging isn't a Jedi trait."

I smiled. I was pleased with Phoenix putting down Canderous. No pride. No arrogance. A simple comment that she acknowledged that she was no better than either of us. However, my hopes were slightly dashed as she continued to banter with the Mandalorian.

"Course if I defeat Bastila and Juhani….you get to face Carth. Are you sure you want that, Canderous?"

He laughed. "I said fantasy….never said I would act on it."

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "Mandalorians….all talk and no action."

Canderous snorted. "You sure have a smart mouth, Phoenix Star. Finish dueling with your little Jedi friends here and I'll show you action later on."

She grinned. "I'd look forward to that Canderous."

I shook my head. So now she was flirting with the Mandalorian, I think. Depending on what Phoenix or Canderous meant by 'action.' No wonder, she drove me crazy. Despite everything that Master Dorak said about the Force not making mistakes. Phoenix's gutsy and brash attitude still made me wonder if the Dark Lord was truly dead, as Master Vrook kept harping about.

She ignited her two blades, green and blue and then she quietly changed the setting to a training setting so the blades wouldn't be lethal. I cocked my head in curiosity at the two blades. One represented Phoenix, her present as a consular and the other represented Revan's past as a guardian. I had not gotten the concept till I saw Phoenix ignite both blades. She frowned. "Bastila…whoohoo….Coruscant to Bastila."

Juhani chuckled. "Perhaps Bastila is not interested in training, Phoenix."

I shook my head. "I apologize I was distracted for a moment. Let us begin."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Bastila ignited her duel yellow blade and then turned a knob on the blade to lower the setting from lethal to a training setting and Juhani a red one. The same red one that she had fought me with on Dantooine. She too turned a knob on the blade to transform the blade to a training setting.

"Let's see what you have got Juhani. The last time you were a bit…." I paused, "your moves were a bit too emotionally driven. I think you're a better lightsaber fighter when you're not claiming the Dark Side is a part of you."

Juhani nodded. "It is true. I thought I was stronger with the Dark Side. It cheated me, it made me think that."

Canderous snorted and Juhani glared at the Mandalorian. I shook my head. "Ignore him, Juhani. He just wants to wind you up and goad you into a fight."

Juhani chuckled. "That is true….Phoenix."

The three way sparring started. Bastila's duel blade made for wide strikes that could split me down my middle right down to my legs. I kept my distance. I acted like the blades weren't on a training setting. It was best to think that way because the next time the blades would cut and burn. However, this made the training for me harder because I kept the mindset that it could be dangerous. I blocked the sharp cuts with my two blades.

Restraint made this a much more difficult match. Yet, I relished the practice because it took my mind off the restless itchy feeling I always got from space travel.

A crowd started to form in the garage as Zaalbar and Mission entered. "Come on Nix…." Mission said with a grin on her face.

I smiled lightly and Juhani nipped a bit of skin off my neck and stated. "A Jedi must not be distracted, Phoenix. Distraction equals death."

I rubbed my neck. "Yea but so does banter…."

"So tell me Ms. I-Will-Be-Your-Doom-Juhani. Your master Quatra….what was she like?"

Juhani's strikes grew a bit emotive. Ahh I had found a weakness, banter had its place as distraction.

"She was another Cathar. She was off-world when our planet was attacked by the Mandalorians. I was just a child when my planet was destroyed. The only Cathar I ever knew was my mother and father. However, Quatra agreed to take me on as her padawan to teach me the Jedi way as well as teach me the customs of the Cathar."

I snorted. "That went really well….when she provoked you to anger."

"Master Quatra meant well….Phoenix. She knew the risk an angry Cather poses not only to themselves but to others. My people are warriors by nature, our fiery nature was the reason the Mandalorians attacked my home."

Canderous spoke. "Did you know, Phoenix that was when Revan vowed to stop the Mandalorians?"

We were both thoroughly engaged in saber play as we spoke. Bastila snorted. "Rumor and hearsay, Mandalorian."

I was curious and I held up my hand to stop the sparing. "There is always a shred of truth….to rumors and hearsay, Bastila."

Mission nodded. "Yea….Griff always said that rumors were like credits from a drunk, they flow freely into somebody elses pocket. But, I agree with Nix, there is a grain of truth to every story told."

Canderous nodded. "Anyway the story is that Revan found a mask of a Mandalorian warrior that tried to stop the slaughter of the Cathar. He vowed that he would never take it off till the Mandalorians were vanquished. At least that's the story. Revan hadn't officially entered the war at that moment nor was Revan really that well known at that point in time among the Republic or the Mandalorians, but the tale took off afterwards. It spread like wild fire among the Mandalorians and the Republic. Before that, Revan was an unknown Jedi who preferred to cling to the shadows and normally had Malak speak for him. After that battle at Cathar, Revan stepped forward and became the warrior we respected. However, Mandalore laughed at Revan and the Jedi that were with him, because what we knew of the Jedi, they were cowering cowards that trembled at war and were afraid. Revan proved otherwise."

Bastila snorted. "I still say rumor and hearsay, because the Mandalorians were vanquished and Revan never took off his mask."

Canderous shrugged. "And how do you know that, little Jedi princess?"

Bastila sighed. "Because there were a lot of rumors that flowed during the war, Mandalorian and I think highlighting Revan in a glorious manner is wrong. Revan was a butcher….a murderer, and disobeyed the council by going to war."

"And we'd all be speaking Mandalorian if Revan and Malak didn't disobey the council." I turned my head to the voice that spoke to find Carth enter the room. He must have come into the room hearing Bastila's rant.

"You don't know that, Carth. The council urged patience. There was something out there the council saw that devoured Revan and Malak and those that followed them."

Carth's eyes narrowed. "So you're saying we should have done nothing? Just let the Mandalorians conquer us unopposed? I mean, the Republic was under attack, and the Order abandoned us!"

"We did not abandon you! But the Council were not about to throw lives away foolishly. In time, we would have aided you against the Mandalorians. But you couldn't wait. Revan and Malak offered a quicker answer, and the Republic chose to walk the easy path rather than the path of wisdom. Now we see the results all around us. Do I think things could have been different? I _know_ they could have! If Revan had only listened to the Council, millions of innocent people would still be alive."

Carth sighed and shook his head. "And by then it would have been too late."

Carth and Bastila both stormed off and I frowned and looked at Juhani. "What in the Force brought that on?"

Canderous laughed. "Revisionist history, Phoenix. You Jedi have a view of the war, I have mine, and so does your vaunted Republic soldier-lover. So when those views conflict, expect sparks."

I shook my head and looked at Juhani, "You still want to spar, Juhani?"

Juhani shook her head. "The Force is tense, Phoenix. It became tense with Bastila. I think it's best to say that the moment for sparring has passed. Perhaps we can try again later, Phoenix."

I nodded, I felt Bastila, somehow talking about Revan had upset her tremendously. There seemed to be a pattern to Bastila getting upset and talking or reflecting on Revan. Didn't Bastila say her confrontation with Revan was painful? Maybe Bastila ended up psychically wounded by Revan during her confrontation with the Dark Lord. I thought about other moments when Revan was mentioned and I remembered that Bastila always felt upset when she talked or even heard about Revan. There had to be some sort of psychic wound or damage that happened to Bastila when she fought the Dark Lord. Mentioning the Dark Lord only opened the wound up and prevented it from healing.

I sighed. "Juhani….Canderous… Mission, Zaalbar. I think maybe it would be best not to mention Revan anymore at least not to Bastila. I think Bastila ended up hurt during her confrontation with Revan."

Juhani frowned. "How do you know that, Phoenix?"

I paused. "I am bonded to Bastila, Juhani. I can feel Bastila and her feelings and anytime we mention Revan, her heart speeds up, her breath quickens, she pales, and she gets defensive. Not necessarily all in that order or all at once. All I can deduce is something happened to her when she confronted Revan. It must have been devastating to her and caused her a terrible psychic wound."

Juhani nodded. "Fair enough, I will not mention Revan to Bastila."

Canderous frowned. "I guess the Jedi princess is really more fragile than I thought. Some Jedi….she couldn't even take the death of Revan like a warrior."

"Canderous, Bastila isn't a warrior. She's a nineteen galactic year standard girl. I'd be terrified if I was her age and I had to see the death of the Dark Lord. She tries to act tough but I think she's a lot weaker than she wants to admit. I think I'd be shell shocked, and I am sure Mandalorians had enough wounded cases from the war."

Canderous sighed. "Yea, we did. We usually killed them, a mentally wounded Mandalorian is no good on the battlefield or in life."

I shook my head. "Except Bastila isn't a Mandalorian, Canderous. She's a Jedi padawan, and a terrified one at that. I... I should have realized it earlier. But….I am kind of thick….I didn't really want to think about the connection we have. I've tried to ignore it. That was foolish of me. Anyway, No more talking about Revan around her."

Zaalbar moaned. "I don't know anything about this Dark Lord, so I have nothing to mention."

Mission nodded. "Yea, I won't talk about some creaky old Sith if it bothers Bastila."

Canderous shook his head. "Fine….I won't mention Revan. Even though….Bastila needs to deal with her issues. She's going to have to eventually."

I nodded. "For what's it worth I agree with you, Canderous. Yet...we'll deal with that after we deal with Malak. For the sake of the mission, we can't afford to have some psychic wound re-open up on her during this mission. The Jedi need her, the Republic needs her…..and…." I sighed, "I need her."

Canderous shook his head. "What if Malak brings up Revan? we can't afford to have Bastila go to pieces over that."

I sighed. "Then I shall have to be strong for the both of us, Canderous. She's bonded to me. I'll loan her some of my strength. I just hope it's enough."

* * *

A/N: I updated the last chapter prior. Something about Minden Ravenheart's comments seemed a tad stream of consciousness so I separated them out from his conversation with Karath. I also added a tad bit more regarding Revan's childhood. Also I tweaked chapter 37 about Carth's feelings regarding Phoenix. It didn't flow right and Ether brought it up. Thanks again Ether.


	45. 44:Ebon Hawk: Stars Burn Lines pt 2

****Chapter 44: Ebon Hawk: Till the Stars Burn Lines Part 2****

 ** **~Canderous~****

Phoenix was acting more like a warrior than a Jedi or….something else. I saw how Phoenix and Bastila were with each other. Phoenix had already conquered Carth it was only a matter of time when she conquered Bastila as well. Yet it seemed as though both Phoenix and Bastila were fighting it. However, Phoenix's words burned into me. _I_ _ _shall have to be strong for the both of us...I'll loan her some of my strength.__ Frankly, I didn't think the Jedi princess deserved it, but apparently Phoenix thought otherwise. Yet, it was the actions of a warrior or…. a lover to pick up the slack of those who were wounded. The unattractive cat woman left the garage area probably to waffle and meditate, like the pathetic Jedi she was. The adolescent twi'lek and her furry carpeted babysitter went off, after the action died in the garage. This left Phoenix and me alone. She paced back and forth a bundle of pent up energy.

I laughed. "You're going to wear away the deck plating, kid."

She sighed. "Sorry, I never was fond of space travel. No matter how many times I've traveled the lanes there is something about the cold bleakness of space I never was particularly enamored with."

"I think you would have been better off as a Mando'ade, Phoenix. You wouldn't have had time to pace around like a nervous wild cat. All that energy would have been put to use. Young Mando'ade prove themselves in combat. Me, I mastered the power of the Basilisk war droid in my youth. No time for me to pace around like you are now. In those days we were sweeping across the Outer Rim. Destroying all who fought us. Young Mandalores would prove themselves in real combat with unknown opponents above a thousand worlds. Each brought back the story of his achievements."

"I see…."

"I remember it well, orbiting high above a placid world, its defenses just stirring. As was tradition, I would go ahead of the first wave to find enemies in the thickest fighting. I remember sitting there in my armor, linked directly with the Basilisk thrumming beneath me. My heart racing with fear at the coming battle."

She raised an eyebrow. "You were afraid?"

"A true warrior must face their fears, Phoenix. Only then can one master it and conquer it. Surely you must understand that, Phoenix."

"So who were you fighting?"

"Does it matter? The world and it's people were obliterated."

Phoenix glared at me with disgust in her eyes. "It matters to me."

"Well I don't remember, Phoenix. I fought in many battles. I honestly don't remember what world or what people I fought and killed."

She folded her arms and looked at me coldly. She wanted to say something but she held her peace. I knew some of Phoenix's past as she had told me about it on Taris. Her family had been wiped out in a Mandalorian raid on Deralia. She took to the stars, a Star among the stars, that was an interesting turn of phrase. She bought weapons of war and sold those weapons. She armed as many civilians she could against the Mando'ade, her actions were the actions of a warrior. Yet, weapons were only as good as the person holding the weapon.

I could understand the anger Phoenix had for me and my people. What if the planet I had landed on was her home? Or perhaps one of the other random planets I had invaded with my clan during the war? What if it was my actions that had killed her family? I had invaded so many worlds that the faces of those I had killed during the war all blurred together. Phoenix's angry cold glare at me made sense. Too bad Phoenix hadn't been a Jedi during Revan's time. I was pretty sure Phoenix would have joined Revan in his war because both of them had had similar goals during the war. There was also the rumor that Revan went to war because he was Onderonian. The first official battle of the war had taken place on Onderon. Assuming the rumor was true then the war had been a call to Revan, the call of home. Revan lashed out at the Mandalorians because we had threatened his home. Yet rumors were like gizka, they multiplied quickly. At any rate, both the Jedi Revan and Phoenix seemed to share a very similar warrior's spirit. I smiled at Phoenix and continued my tale.

"Anyway the doors opened in front me and the air was sucked out of the drop bay, scattering crystals of frozen vapor across my path. I can't describe what it feels like to look directly down at a world, falling continuously as you circle it, with barely fifteen centimeters of armor plate protecting you. When the magnetic locks disengaged on my droid I plunged out of the drop bay towards the battle that waited below."

Phoenix paled and I laughed. "We've got to do something about this fear you have about atmosphere, Phoenix. If I had a pressure suit, I'd chuck you out the airlock to prove your strength over your fears."

Her icy glare remained as her fingers slowly were placed on her lightsabers' activation switches. "Don't you even think about it, Canderous."

"You know I speak the truth, Phoenix. You have to overcome this, or it will kill you or harm you."

She sighed and her shoulders slumped. "I don't even know where I developed such a fear over this. I feel like….I am floating in nothingness…..and oblivion. It's worse when I am in cramped places. I feel like a child….sobbing in fear." Phoenix paused a moment. "Bah….why am I telling you this?"

"To strengthen yourself as a warrior, one must find the underlying reasons behind the fear."

"True, Canderous. I need to squash this fear I have or it will dominate and control me."

I nodded. "I conquered and overcame my fears, Phoenix. If I can do it, then I know you can. When I was on my Basilisk. It was incredible, Phoenix. The exhilaration, the euphoria, I felt as I streaked into the atmosphere, dodging self-guided projectile and beam weapons, was unmatched. An 80 kilometer plunge through the atmosphere, dodging and weaving, the outside of my armor glowing like the sun with the heat of re-entry. And with barely thirty meters to spare, I twisted and skimmed the surface, firing at the giant beam generators that were in my path. The explosion from that sent shock waves that leveled the entire complex around it. It was the moment of my life."

She sighed. "Perhaps I need to ride a Basilisk….to understand the thrill and to conquer my fear." She then smiled and stopped pacing and looked strong and firm. "I want a Basilisk war droid….for that reason!"

I chuckled. "Now that's the warrior spirit, I know you possess. Now….I promised you action. Course I think that noisy little Jedi princess thinks I meant something else."

She laughed. "She did. No offense, Canderous but I've already got Carth and…."

"And….you exude a certain amount of…tension around Bastila, Phoenix. I'd be blind if I didn't notice it. You know you could probably bed her, if you are forceful enough and I don't think she'd fight it either, that is assuming….you want her."

She shook her head. "Yea, and I don't think that would work Canderous, as much as I kind of want to….. bed her as you say and...well…." She turned a bit red. "I've never had a relationship with a woman before and I don't think Bastila has ever had feelings like this before either. She seems kind of awkward….well hell we're both awkward about this to be truthful."

I chuckled. "Well there's a first time for everything."

She sighed. "Part of it is that damn bond we have with each other. I don't want to take advantage of her, Canderous. This bond….it's complicated and if I act on what we both feel, I'll hurt Carth. I love Carth and I think….I am slowly falling for Bastila. There are no doubt exceptions in Mandalorian society, but….if I act on what I feel for Bastila, I'll hurt Carth. And yet, I hurt her being with Carth. If it wasn't for this damn mission….I'd leave them both."

I shook my head and interjected. "You're too damn settled in your Deralian and Jedi morality! Why don't you Carth and Bastila just make your own little clan? You and Bastila can sleep with each other and Carth can sleep with you and Bastila. You can all share the same bed and you'd all be happy together in a perfect little triad. You'd have a good strong clan, Phoenix. You can call it the Star-Shan-Onasi Clan. If something happened to one of you in combat, you'd at least guarantee your children would have a surviving parental figure in their lives."

Phoenix suddenly turned red again, probably at the idea of having children. I laughed. "That is what women generally have, Phoenix. You frack that Republic soldier long enough well... you'll get a child, assuming you're not pregnant already. Such things happen, even to Jedi."

She sighed. "Maybe in a Mandalorian culture and society that would work. Yet I doubt Carth or even Bastila would agree with it. Well maybe I could convince Bastila…..but Carth."

I shook my head. "You're a fracking Jedi, convince him with the Force that it's in his own best interest to allow such a relationship between all three of you."

She shivered a bit. "That type of manipulation would not be right, Canderous. Besides would you honestly want me to use the Force on you and manipulate you into something you wouldn't normally want?"

I snorted. "If it was for my own good and you knew that it was for the best. I'd allow you to do it."

"That would be abusing my power, Canderous and I am not convinced that you'd be happy if I did. Sure you might blissfully go along with it for a time, but I think you'd be seriously pissed off that I messed with your mind. Don't get me wrong, the idea of compelling Carth into such an arrangement is….tempting but it would be incredibly selfish on my part. Besides, I'd know that Carth didn't go into the arrangement willingly. I would be in a position of being a master and he in the position of a slave. I don't want a slave, Canderous. A slave has no freedom and loses all gumption of independence and freedom. That spark of what makes Carth burn brightly as himself, I'd lose and I would eventually be disgusted at him because he would not be the man I fell in love with."

"Damn Jedi morality! You are seriously over thinking this."

"Am I, Canderous? I love Carth and I don't want to alter his perception in any way." She sighed. "I really need to get away from both of them because no matter what I do, someone gets hurt. Even if I left them, they would still be hurt. Plus I'd wound myself in the process. I can't win on this, Canderous."

"Sometimes there is no winning, Phoenix. You'll figure out how to cut your losses in this battle. It's not my battle and I do not envy you on this. Yet, enough talk, I promised you action and I will give it to you. A good old fashion spar in Mandalorian style. No weapons, hand to hand and none of your vaunted Force."

"You mean like the Echani…."

"Hmm yes….the Echani. What does a smuggler like you know about the Echani?"

* * *

 ** **~Phoenix~****

 _"_ _ _What does a smuggler like you know about the Echani?"__

What possessed me to mention the Echani? I knew nothing, at least I didn't think I did. I remembered, how threatened I felt. I had no skill with a blaster and the voice in my head... and how I fought the Vulkars. I shivered. Was that Echani marital arts? The Sith Lord that possessed me knew Echani martial arts. They had controlled my body. I shivered. Frack….I was screwed. Yet, that damn Sith Lord had saved my life. Yet….the Jedi archive readings I had gone over with T3 mentioned that Freedon Nadd had controlled Exar Kun and manipulated him to the Dark Side. Double frack! I don't want to become like Exar Kun.

"Not much…."

Laughter filled my head. __You know more than you realize, Phoenix. combat is the purest form of expression.__

Frack…..leave me alone Sith Lord!

 _ _So__ __I__ _am_ _ _a Sith Lord, now__ _._ _ _That's presuming quite a lot, Phoenix.__ __Who do you think I am? Exar Kun? Naga Sadow maybe. I could be Darth__ __Kath__ __Crap__ __for all you know.__ __Now that's a title….I rule an empire of__ _ _crap.__

Yea, that's hilarious….a Sith Lord with a sense of humor. Darth Kath Crap Okay….that's what I'll call you, since you conveniently won't tell me who you are. Hail Darth Kath Crap!

The voice laughed. __You amuse me Phoenix. And why shouldn't a Sith Lord not have a sense of humor? Do you think all Sith are dark, moody and temperamental? Very well…..I accept your accolade. It's not too far from being….accurate.__

Err….well Malak doesn't seem to have much humor...seeing how he killed Taris and killed his master.

The voice filled with anger. __Malak…__

I could feel the anger from the voice building and then heard _._ _ _Usurper…..usurper…..death to the usurper.__

Woah…..where did that come from? I scrunched up my face in thought, wait a minute…..usurper? Uhh….my head began to throb, not another blasted headache. I dug into my pouch and fumbled for some kolto and injected it. A dull pain still tingled in my head. Cool it Darth Kath Crap, you're giving me a blinking headache.

The voice sighed. __Leave me alone…__ _ _you tire me, Phoenix.__

I frowned now the Sith Lord wanted me to leave them alone. Ironic considering the fact I kept telling them to leave me alone. I internally sighed. Nope, I had questions for this damn Sith Lord.

So Darth Kath Crap….what do you know about the Echani?

 _ _Like I said Combat is the purest form of expression.__

I sighed and said what my voice had told me and stated in a slight monotone voice. "Combat to the Echani is the purest form of expression."

Canderous nodded. "And the Jedi Revan studied Echani techniques. He had the Republic soldiers under him trained in the Echani martial arts. The Echani and Mandalorians have a lot in common. Warrior discipline. The body in itself is a weapon and expresses itself in combat. We met a lot of Echani in combat during the war, like my people they believed in testing oneself in combat. Fighting with the Echani was an honor. But Eshan is no where near Deralia. Deralia is in the Outer Rim. Eshan is in the Inner Rim. Have you ever been to the Inner Rim, Phoenix?"

I shrugged. "I read a lot of books, Canderous. A lot of my knowledge comes from reading."

 _ _An obvious lie…..Phoenix. Tsk tsk….how very Dark Side of you!__

Go away!

 _ _What no admission that I am a mental instability! Or maybe the truth scares you that I am more than what you realize.__

Look Darth Kath Crap go away! I don't want to deal with you anymore.

 _ _Very well…..but like Bastila dealing with Revan, you're going to have to deal with me eventually.__

"I've been to Coruscant, though. I didn't care for it much. Too crowded, too noisy, too smelly. How the frack can sentients stomach living there?"

Canderous chuckled. "You don't strike me as a city gal. How about Nar Shaddaa?"

"Been there….never liked it either. Too many damn hutts. It's as bad as Sleheyron. And what the frack is this some sort of interrogation, Canderous? I thought we were going to spar."

He chuckled. "Of course….I am just curious about your travels, that's all."

 _ _He's not….not really. He's testing you, Phoenix. There's something about you that seems off to him. How does a smuggler know about the Echani and their martial arts anyway?__

Frack…..Darth Kath Crap….go away!

The voice laughed and then disappeared. This was seriously getting annoying.

My hands and body dropped to a stance that felt natural to me and Canderous frowned at me.

"Tell me you read about Echani martial arts and practiced it out of some damn book."

My shoulders slumped. I couldn't lie anymore, Darth Kath Crap was right. I sighed. "I don't know, Canderous. I fracking don't know. Maybe a book, or I learned it from someone. I just know it comes to me naturally."

He nodded. "I kind of figured as much….ehh….doesn't matter to me, Phoenix. You're a warrior and skills learned are skills learned. So show me what you do know….Mysterious Stranger."

I snorted. "Funny….." If only he realized that the Echani skills made me a stranger not only to him but to myself.

My hands went up and my feet kicked into Canderous and he laughed. "Impressive. Most impressive. You know the higher forms."

I frowned and he said. "Look, I don't know much about Echani martial arts either, but I fought enough Echani to recognize their higher forms of their art and you know them Phoenix."

He used his hands and feet as well but it seemed to be a Mandalorian form of fighting. I easily side stepped his throws and he said. "Sith's blood…..are you using the Force? You're quick."

"I can't help it if I am, Canderous. I am a Jedi."

He nodded. "Unconscious Force use. Damn it, Phoenix."

"Advantage is advantage…..Canderous. There are no rules in pure combat."

"That's true….that's a very Mandalorian turn of phrase. Of course Revan said similar to Mandalore during that final fight. He wanted to fight Mandalore with nothing but his hands and feet. As if it was nothing more than a duel circle fight. Mandalore refused those terms and said he'd fight Revan at his full potential. Jedi skill and all."

"You were there, weren't you?"

Canderous nodded.

"What was that fight like?"

Canderous smiled. "It was glorious, Phoenix. And even still I think Revan held back some. It was as if he wanted to prove that he could fight Mandalore like a Mandalorian. Those two had some words that few could hear during that fight. In the end, Revan beheaded Mandalore with a massive lightsaber strike to his head. Revan took the head and the helmet. Revan laughed and said….."

"Behold your mighty…..warrior dead. Surrender to me children of Mandalore. Your lives are mine and they belong to me."

"Yes…..those are the words Revan spoke. Although I suspect you probably saw that on a holo. The Republic wanted to show it's people that final fight. Revan made us surrender our armor and our weapons. The disarming of the Mandalorians was quite a propaganda piece to the Republic and even Revan knew that. He insisted that that final fight was filmed. I've seen that holo several times, Phoenix. Let's continue our fight."

I moved swiftly. Canderous threw a few lucky blows that hit me. Yea I was going to feel those bruises the next day. I landed some hard blows and Canderous finally ended the fight. "We shall have to fight some more later on, Phoenix. I want to know more of you in combat and I'll gladly share more of my past with you. You've earned it, kid."

I nodded. My body was covered in sweat and I needed to hit the 'fresher. I stripped from my clothing and entered the fresher and was embarrassed as I stepped in to noticed Bastila in the 'fresher. She must of forgotten to lock the 'fresher room door. I stared at her body for the longest. Slender, tall, and every bit the Jedi. She was even muscular in places I wasn't expecting. Frack, I needed to get away from this. Yet, I couldn't budge. I was transfixed. My eyes stared at her with longing. She looked at me. She looked just as frozen as I. She felt it and I felt her. Her heart beating and pulsing with similar longing. I sighed. She suddenly pulled me in and she kissed me. Her body was wet and mine was wet as the 'fresher's water pulsed into us.

"I can't….." She muttered. "I've tried…..I love you Phoenix."

Damn Canderous was right, bed her; I could bed her and she wouldn't fight me. She wasn't fighting me now nor was I fighting her. I was already pretty heated with my sparring with Canderous and this felt like combat. I kissed her and we both giggled like two anxious schoolgirls. We had never done this before and I knew this was more of an exploration for both of us. We washed each others bodies. She tickled me as she washed my body. Damn it….she knew my weakness that I was ticklish. Of course she would, we were bonded to each other.

I nibbled lightly on one of her ears and she gasped. "Phoenix…." Her head lay on my chest as the water dripped down us. Force, she looked so young without her Jedi robes and the water dripping down her naked body. She looked like a child, so wondrously innocent. As I stared at her, it dawned on me that she was only a few years older than Mission. She was beautiful and her body was radiant, her skin was soft as I caressed her.

"Bastila….oh Bastila." I held onto her. She looked into my eyes and I looked into hers and I saw love, admiration, and respect. I kissed her once more and at that moment there were no regrets. She giggled and she started feeling my body with her hands and pressed into me where she could and then the Force came into play. She was using it and I felt myself using it with her as I felt our spirits and bodies merge. The bond made it much more intimate than I realized and I groaned in pleasure. "Bastila…..."

 ** **~0o0~****

I sighed as Bastila and I leaned against the wall of the Hawk outside of the 'fresher and in the small room that contained the 'fresher, we were both now fully clothed. She shook her head. "We shouldn't have done that. It was wrong."

"It's a little late on that, Bastila."

"We are Jedi. It shouldn't have happened at all. We're suppose to be beyond such crude physical actions."

"Yea...now you tell me. How am I going to…." I paused. "Sithspit…..I can't be your lover, Bastila."

Bastila sighed. "Carth…."

"Yea….Carth. Force….I've cheated on him. Damn it…..damn this bond."

Bastila looked at me sadly. "I am sorry, Phoenix. I just saw you and…."

"Yea and I saw you and….I couldn't ignore what we felt anymore."

She nodded. "I felt the same and…." she kissed me, her mouth fully entwined within my mouth and I embraced her, unwilling to fight it even now.

She broke away from me. "No more, Phoenix…"

"I have to cut my losses….Bastila."

"What?"

"Something Canderous said to me. Look it's best…..we part…..I've hurt Carth and I've hurt myself because of this. We felt something and acted on it but let's be realistic on this. It's either him and me or you and me. We can't live like this, you and me discretely having moments in the 'fresher or anything else and then me having a relationship with him as well. It won't work. I sighed and kissed her lightly on the cheek. We are sisters, Bastila. Nothing more nothing less. So we got a little too close but in the end we are still sisters."

"Sisters…..yes…..it is probably better that way. Force forgive us. We won't speak of this anymore, Phoenix."

* * *

 ** **~Bastila~****

Sisters. Yes, it was better that way. Although that moment in the 'fresher. I sighed, I enjoyed it much more than I wanted to admit and I felt the love we had for each other. Yet the reality dawned on me deeply. I had made love to Revan. Force, what had I done? It hit me like a ton of ferrocrete bricks. More so because of the fact that Revan didn't know who she was. I had made love to the Ex-Sith Lord. No, this couldn't continue! It wasn't right, not only to Phoenix, but it wasn't right to me either. It felt like a double edged vibroblade. I had cut myself deeply.

Revan….err Phoenix felt slightly similar about it but for a different reason. Carth. She loved him. I had felt that love she had for him too through the bond; more so now after we made love to each other. He had issues regarding betrayal because of Saul Karath and I began to cry. We had wounded each other. She was right, we were sisters, but sisters on a much deeper level than could even be explained because of what we had done together.

Phoenix sighed. "Sis….don't cry. Please don't cry. I know you're feeling the same as I am."

She kissed my eyes, kissing away the tears. The feeling of her lips on my eyes, was a curious sensation. The tears came flowing down my eyes even more. "Phoenix….stop….please by the Force….stop."

Phoenix looked weary and she said. "Force, I don't know what I am going to do? Should I be honest with Carth?"

I looked at her. "That's up to you Phoenix. But Carth's feelings, he's fragile. This will hurt him as much as it will hurt you. I don't want to hurt….you."

"I haven't exactly been the paragon of honesty, Bastila."

I nodded. "I know…Phoenix."

She stared at me. "How much do you know?"

"I know you've been hiding things from me, Phoenix."

She cringed. "I don't think this is the right moment to talk about it." She paused and then added. "I know you're also hiding things from me as well….I felt them as we….."

"No. It's not." I laid a hand on Phoenix's shoulder and rubbed it gingerly, I felt the soreness from a bruise that she had sparring with Canderous. It was sore and then I couldn't help myself. I kissed it. I loved her and didn't want her to be in pain. __Stop it…Bastila, stop.__

"I need to be away from this bond of ours. I need to weaken it. I need to be anywhere but near you!"

She nodded in agreement with me. "Frack…." She muttered. "I am fracked in the head." She pursed her lips together. "I think…. Force….I need to try and tell the truth…..I don't know how though. The damage is already done….frack….Bastila…." She banged her head against the wall. "So fracking screwed….."

 **"** ** **Phoenix….don't do that!"****

I was worried that she might injure her head. It wasn't as if Revan could afford any more trauma to her brain and mind.

She looked at me, her eyes and very being filled with pain. She went out of the room crying…..I wanted to follow her but I didn't. I didn't dare. I couldn't trust my feelings or emotions if I did.

* * *

A/N: Okay I fixed some issues with chapters 42 and 43. I added some more angst with Forn Dodonna about finding out that Revan is alive. Just a small bit because it seemed a bit flat and Ether mentioned it as well. I just wasn't sure where it was flat. I also changed the saber sparring into training setting because I know so little about lightsabers that a true lightsaber would maim if it gets too close. Thanks Ether! Anyway that's it on the issues. Next chapter will be on Tatooine. I promise!


	46. Chapter 45: Tatooine: Late Night Landing

**Chapter 45: Tatooine: Late Night Landing**

 **~Carth~**

We landed on Tatooine, it was late at night. Most of the crew were sleeping away. I debated on letting Bastila and Phoenix know that we landed. I quietly went to the sleeping area to find Phoenix tossing and thrashing around in her sleep. Nightmare. She said she had been having visions of Revan and Malak. I couldn't imagine that was in any form or fashion pleasant. She woke up with a sudden gasp. "Take it easy, gorgeous…."

She looked as if she was going to cry in front of me. "That bad…."

"I am sick of these dreams and I am sick of this damn bond."

I sat down on her bunk and held her. "I have no idea what you're going through, love. But if you want to talk about it."

She shook her head. "Talk about what... the fact that I am going insane?"

I frowned. "Insane! Why do you think that?"

"I….I think I….I think I am in over my head, Republic."

I smiled softly. "So now you're agreeing with me that you've bit off more than you can chew."

She nodded and started crying. Morgana got this way before we had Dustil. She would be emotional, moody, and then end up crying. I frowned, was it possible that Phoenix might be having a...my...our.. child? Course it might be a bit too early and I thought that Jedi could keep that from happening by using the Force and keeping a child from being conceived. Well maybe not...or maybe Phoenix forgot to use the Force when we made love to each other. If she had….well not that I didn't want a child. Yet, having a child and facing off against Malak. I sighed, that was not the ideal situation to conceived a child. However, it hadn't been ideal when Morgana had conceived Dustil, so there really wasn't any ideal time to have a child.

I stroked her soft dark black hair. "Whatever happens, my little Raven. I'll be by your side."

She started bawling even more. Yep hormones. I kissed her. Something didn't feel right about the kiss and then I realized that Phoenix wasn't responding to the kiss. She was being cold, indifferent and without any passion. That had to have been Bastila's influence rubbing off on her.

"Damn it, Phoenix…..this is a fine time to act all Jedi on me."

She looked at me, dried the tears from her eyes and then said. "I stink at being a Jedi. I am a horrible Jedi."

I shook my head. "No, you're not! You've done so much. You saved Juhani, you helped the settlers of Dantooine with the Mandalorians, you found a couple of murderers, and you united the Sandral and Matale families."

She sighed. "I can't control my passions, I am impatient, I am brash, reckless, and I don't agree fully with the Jedi code. All I am is a smuggler in Jedi garb. I am a fake, Republic, and my decisions will end up hurting you and everyone around me."

That sounded like Bastila and the Jedi Council's philosophy playing havoc with poor Phoenix's mind. To me it sounded like she had come to some horrible knowledge or realization about something. With the words she spoke, I was thoroughly convinced that that realization or knowledge was that Phoenix was pregnant with our child. For any other sentient that would be wonderful news but for a Jedi…..that would be a disaster. Her future in the Order would be at stake, she could potentially be kicked out. I kissed her lightly on the forehead and lightly brushed a few errant strands of hair out of her eyes. She didn't say anything about a child, but maybe she was trying to be brave on my account. Perhaps she was in denial or perhaps she was considering terminating the pregnancy. However, I doubt any Jedi would approve of that and frankly neither would I. I had lost Dustil and terminating a pregnancy felt wrong on so many different levels.

I looked at her and said calmly. "I think…..I think you are tired, Phoenix and your emotional balance is off kilter. You're saying garbage like this because you're not sleeping properly. It doesn't help having dreams with Revan and Malak in them. It could also be that damn bond you have with Bastila as well. Let me see if I can find something in the medlab to help knock you out so you can sleep. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you, we've arrived on Tatooine, so we can start looking for the Star Map when the suns rise."

Phoenix nodded blandly.

It might not be wise to give a pregnant woman sedatives but….Phoenix needed something and I would look and see if I could find something to help her sleep.

I left the room to find something to aid her rest. When I returned, she was gone, her sheets were all askew, her lightsabers were missing, and I scowled. Great, that's all I needed was for a hormonal emotional Jedi woman to bolt and take off. It was obvious that Phoenix wasn't thinking clearly. She couldn't have gone far though, it wasn't as if Anchorhead was that big a place to get lost in. I had an idea what places Phoenix might go to if she was in a snit. It wasn't as if this was a first for her. I thought back to Taris, yep she was emotional and moody then. I sighed, some habits just didn't change.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

My head was filled with the vision of strange temple ruins and the opening of a Star Map. Once again, my emotionally driven mind was the focus for a damn Force vision. I was pretty sure this vision was due to me and Bastila's tryst in the Hawk's fresher. I felt sick inside and even though I wanted to tell Carth about me and Bastila, I couldn't. I was a coward. A big fracking coward. I grabbed a necklace I made for Mission out of the lightsaber crystals we had harvested on Dantooine and plopped it beside the twi'lek's bed with a small note telling her she was a good friend, sister and that it was better for her and Zaalbar if I left. I told her I wasn't sure how long I'd be gone and that I could be gone a day, a week, a year. I just needed time away from everyone.

I quietly looked at T3 as I exited the bunk area. He was in standby mode. "Come on, T3….let's get out of here."

The droid beeped, coming out of standby:: Phoenix….it's early. You should be recharging.::

I snorted. "No thanks….I am recharged enough. I need a good faithful droid and we're leaving.::

T3 beeped:: Phoenix, do you mean permanently?::

I sighed "I don't know, T3. I just know I can't stay. Now be quiet and let's go."

T3 followed me as we exited out of the Hawk. Warm hot air assaulted me even though it was night time.

::Phoenix, where are we going?::

"I need a drink, T3."

::Intoxicating liquors are bad for your system, Phoenix. Your motivators will end up damaged.::

I laughed. "That's an interesting turn of phrase for getting drunk, but yea, I kinda want to get drunk. T3, do you know which local Tatooine brew here is best to create intoxication?"

::Fermented nerf milk is consumed by many of the locals as a cheap form of inebriation.::

I made a face. "Eww...I don't think so. I think I'll stick to juma…."

A rodian approached me. "Are you Phoenix Star?"

I frowned. "What? How do you know who I am?"

"Ship listing of Ebon Hawk is in your name, Phoenix Star."

"Oh…."

The rodian sighed. "I am Grava Twiva, I see you've dyed, cut your hair, and altered your appearance Phoenix Star. Perhaps that was wise."

"Uhh..."

"Word of warning, Phoenix Star. He is here….the bounty hunter. He is looking for you once again, to finish what he started with you last time. I would have thought that you would not be stupid to step on this planet once again, after what Calo Nord did to you last time."

"Did to me last time?"

Grava Twiva frowned. "You not remember what happened last time you were here?"

"I...I….don't remember."

"You were shot up, burned, and diced up pretty bad, Phoenix Star. Smart cousin followed you from Naboo. Worried about you, your cousin was. He was worried enough to follow you here. I helped guide him to what I thought was your corpse. You were still alive, barely I think. Calo Nord thought you were dead. You weren't moving. You were more dead than alive. I thought you were dead. Yet, it is amazing what kolto can do and the determination of your cousin. Somehow you survive, I do not know how you survive because you were badly injured, you were inert and perhaps your mind was damaged too. I think that is why you not remember what happened here."

My eyes went wide. My Sith possession. Of course, it all began to make sense. The Sith spirit must have entered my body when I was injured here on Tatooine. The Sith had bound itself to me when Calo Nord had almost killed me. It would make sense. I had no will to fight back against such a thing and the Sith spirit clung to me and saved my life. I sighed, this seemed and felt right to me. Now I just had to figure out how to excise them from my body. I was here on Tatooine, the Jedi texts, T3 downloaded would tell me how to get rid of them. I had to confront the spirit and get rid of them.

I stared at the rodian not really recalling them. I felt like I was digging through a past deluge of memories that felt hazy and not completely clear. All I could remember was a feeling of pain, agony, and my right eye suddenly throbbed. I rubbed my eye. Damn what was causing my eye to pain me? "You're right….I don't remem…."My mind throbbed and I suddenly saw an image of the rodian and I laughing and shaking hands together. "We were business partners….I think..."

Grava nodded. "Ahh you remember me. You still in weapons? This would be the only reason you come back, I think..."

Hmm….yea the Star Map for the Star Forge, strange how that works.

I nodded.

"I had them taken to your ship. However, you will have to gut them to remove the weapons from them."

"Gut them?"

"Yes, the gizka. It was a smart idea, Phoenix Star to smuggle weapons in gizka. Everyone hates gizka. Every one thinks they are vermin. But only smart smuggler like you would have illegal hold out blasters and their parts put in gizka. I want my payment and Czerka wants payment."

I sighed. "I haven't exactly been running the blaster and rifle smuggling ring I was….I well….I am looking for bigger weapons…oddly enough."

He looked at me and then nodded. "Ahh….you are Jedi now….errr…..I could see why you wouldn't be running your smuggling ring like you use to. The Order would not approve. Perhaps that is how you survive, Calo Nord. You are strong in the Force."

Yea, strong enough to attract a fracking Sith spirit that's laid dormant till now. My Jedi training probably awakened the damn thing. However, this made me worry about something very alarming. What if I did die… and my body was reanimated by the damn Sith Lord? Was I a fracking Sith slave? No wonder Master Vrook was always cross with me. He knew I was possessed. Yet, apparently I was the only one with enough raw Force potential to take on Malak. However, the masters were willing to take the risk to begin with.

It all made sense. However, there was one thing, how did Bastila fit into all this? We were bonded to each other. She had to know I was possessed. Maybe she was supposed to watch over me and keep the Sith spirit from possessing me fully. Heh that had turned out really well, she had fallen in love with me. If worst came to worst, Bastila might have to kill me. Ouch, yea kill someone you love. Uhh yea, talk about a major blunder. Yet, if Darth Kath Crap did come out I would give her my very lightsaber and have her kill me. I would not let Darth Kath Crap emerge from me.

My mind turned back to the conversation at hand. "I don't suppose you could remove the gizka from my ship."

"No, too much of a pain to remove. You will have to gut them yourself. Provided they have not already bred and you have more gizka."

I groaned. "Wonderful."

T3 interjected::Does this mean you will be returning to the Hawk, Phoenix?::

"I suppose so. But not before I get pissed off drunk."

Grava laughed. "You have not changed, Phoenix Star. You still like to drink. Although I must warn you that is how Calo caught you last time."

"I seriously don't remember, facing Calo Nord here."

"Then I shall have to help you remember."

I sighed. "I'll take your word for it, Grava. I suppose you still want me to pay for the gizka."

Grava nodded. "Yes, but since you are Jedi I am sure we can come to an acceptable compromise that can benefit you and Czerka. I will buy you drink, Phoenix. Drink always with business agreements."

 **~o0o~**

I paid Grava a down payment for the gizka and promised him the rest of the money after I found a buyer for the weapons within the gizka. I at least owed the rodian for the trouble. Gizka were trouble, even though these gizka were special gizka.

I was into my third cup of juma and feeling a bit warm, flushed, as well as slightly lightheaded. Grava chuckled. "I not know a Jedi who liked to drink as much as you, Phoenix Star."

I sighed. "I am not your ordinary Jedi."

"Now Czerka and I very close so I know their problems. They need miners and they need protection. Miners are not easy to come by with the Sand People attacking them. They are starting to ship wookiee slaves from Kashyyyk to help with mining."

"That's messed up, Grava. Wookiees on Tatooine, they are all fur and with the heat….."

I shook my head for a moment, my vision was getting a bit foggy and I saw strange auras flickering around my eyes. This would be a really bad time for a headache.

Gava nodded. "No one said Czerka cared about the welfare of wookiees, Phoenix Star. They slowly overheat but wookiee slaves save Czerka money and Czerka has been losing money with their mining operation here on Tatooine."

I tapped my empty glass and the bar tender filled my glass with more juma juice.

 _::Phoenix… You're drunk. I can sense it.::_

 _::Piss off Bastila. You didn't exactly help me, you made things worse.::_

 _:: Phoenix. I feel your drunken haze. You're making me feel drunk too….::_

I laughed and drained my cup: _ _:Tough, we get to share everything, including my drunk pissed off mood, Bastila.::__

She sighed _:_ _ _:I am sorry. I still love and care about you, Phoenix. Come back to the Hawk, Please. Mission found your note. She's worried about you and I am worried about you too. I told her you were depressed and that you weren't thinking clearly, which clearly is true. Oh and what's with all the gizka? Some twi'leks loaded two whole crates of them on the ship. One of the crates busted open. Tell me this isn't some brilliant scheme of yours?::__

 _::Can you shut up, Bastila….I've got business going on here. Something about wookiee slaves, Czerka, and mining. I just drunk four cups of juma and_ _with_ _ _you yammering and all, I am having difficulties concentrating.::__

 _::That's it I am coming to collect you, Phoenix. Why do you have to act like a drunken smuggler?::_

I snorted _ _:: Frack, Bastila. I am a drunken smuggler. You love me, you've got to get use to my idiosyncrasies. Carth was able to, so you have to as well.::__

She sighed: _ _:I suppose you're right. I feel caught up in the wake of your destiny and your power, Phoenix. I wish I wasn't but I am. You have such power...such passion.::__

I rolled my eyes _:_ _ _:That has to be the juma talking...you're getting the after affect of my drunkenness..::__

 _::Perhaps so. But I still feel drawn to you through our powerful bond.::_

 _I raised my hand and was staring at my hand. It looked funny, as if I could see two hands rather than one._

Grava laughed. "You drunk yet, Jedi? Good. I give you powerful sedative. Calo wants you."

I looked at the rodian, no there were two rodians infront of me.

"What? You sold me out!" I reached out in the Force. The cup I was drinking out of suddenly shattered. Damn it... my reach was off, that had to be the sedative. Plus it sort of explained the double vision I was getting as well as the flickering auras. I felt like I was staring through a cloud of murky fog. I thought it was people smoking cigs that made the room hazy.

"You should not have come back, Phoenix Star. I did warn you, after all business partner you deserved at least one warning….I feel guilty for…last..." He paused. "You played right into my hand, you not remember last time what Grava do and you not listen. You like juma way too much. Calo paid me again. Last time, you owe me many credits and you keep saying you will pay me. Your heart always overruled your business sense. You never pay me enough. You played me and Calo for saps...Phoenix Star. Calo's offer, It was more than worth it. You not sense any deception from me because I tell you all truth, including warning about Calo. Czerka does need protection for miners, slaves, and from the Sand People. They would hire you Jedi in exchange to pay off your debts to them. However, Calo's offer was too tempting, even for an old business partner. Looks like you are in deep bantha crap, Phoenix Star."

I tried to rise up from my seat, the sedative from the juma going through me. I said to T3. "T3….get help….." I fell back down into my seat, the whole cantina was spinning around me. I tried to reach for my lightsabers but found that they were in both Grava's hands. Man...how much sedative did Grava add to the juma? Did this mean that the bartender was on Calo's take or just Grava's? And...maybe I was thinking too much like a smuggler and not enough like a Jedi. I had been too emotional to Carth, when I said I had been a fake and not a true Jedi. Damn it all...my thoughts had been muddled but now they were worse with drugs added to the mix. Plus there was the fact that I doubted I could wield the lightsabers properly with my addled mind. Gah! I had been caught with my proverbial pants down. Didn't Juhani and I had that lesson about how distraction can cause a Jedi's death? Damn...it...my drinking had been a distraction and even T3 had been right, drinking damages your motivators. Gah...humiliated by a damn droid and their droid logic. I tried once again to reach out with the Force to do something but my connection felt muted. I managed to grasp Bastila's mind. _:_ _ _:Bastila…..help….Calo Nord…..::__

The droid quickly rolled out of the cantina. Grava took me by the hand and as I was stumbling forward. I tried to fight him but I was in a stupor, I tried kicking and hitting him, but my body felt like it was in slow motion. The damn double vision didn't help me either. The rodian cuffed me and to add insult to injury he clamped a neural inhibitor around my neck. I was now effectively Force blind. I was lead out of the cantina like a damn nerf to the slaughter. I was still trying to fight off the effects of the sedative but it was strong and without the Force that was a particularly worthless endeavor. Calo obviously knew I was a Jedi or a Force user.

I fell forward and into the arms of Calo Nord. He smiled. "Hello Phoenix Star, Admiral Karath is waiting for you…."

Darkness fell.

Laughter hit me. _Boy Phoenix you are dumb trusting a rodian you vaguely remember from a vague memory. If you had thought this through a bit more, then you should realized that Grava betrayed you to Calo the first time. He hinted at it when you met him and you were too stupid to realize that he was betraying you yet again. You surely didn't pay him enough during your 'partnership.' Course if you meet up with him again, you really ought to fry and gut him. You would enjoy that, I think. Vermin like him deserve death for such betrayals._

There was a sigh. _You forgot_ _that you_ _are_ _supposed_ __to be a Jedi. You could have at anytime have used the Force. You were blindsided, thinking of yourself as Force__ _ _b__ _ _lind commoner.__ _ _How di__ _ _sgusting!__ _ _Y__ _ _ou are better than that Phoenix. You still have much to learn.__

Damn it, Darth Kath Crap….am I dead? That's all I need, to be stuck being one with the Force with a fracking dead Sith Lord spirit hounding me about using the fracking Dark Side and acting all disappointed in me.

 _No, just unconscious. You must fight this….Admiral Karath…..wants you._

Carth's mentor? Why?

 _No idea._

I think you're lying, Darth Kath Crap.

The voice laughed. _Of course. Just testing what you know of me, Phoenix._

Yea, of course, you could be lying or you could be telling the truth. You called Malak a usurper, why? Or are you just lying about what you know of him as well.

 _Perhaps. Freedon Nadd thought Exar Kun was a usurper as well._

 _How do you know that?_

 _I am a Sith Lord, Phoenix. I know many things that Jedi do not. Dead Sith Lords or supposedly long dead Sith Lords are a hobby of mine, you could say._

I sighed, wonderful I am unconscious with a Sith Lord of questionable honesty.

 _Enough….you need to fight this, Phoenix. Calo will be taking us back to the usurper. You don't want that, do you?_

Malak….shit. Why does he want me?

 _No idea_ _._ _Other than_ _the fact that you_ __are__ _supposed_ _to be a Jedi._

Damn it, Darth Kath Crap. You better give me a better answer than that. I know I am a strong Force user, you know that as well. But I am kind of stuck here with a neural inhibitor clamped around my neck.

 _Ahh good….you're getting angry. Use that anger. It will help you. And neural inhibitors never stopped me or Bastila for that matter._

Not that crap again….

 _Oh yes….but there is also Jedi healing. You forgot that holocron from Master Jax. If you had spent time going over that….rather than shagging Bastila, you'd have learned a wonderful excerpt on how to clear rather stubborn poisons and sedatives from your body. But no…..you had to frack Bastila. Stupid hutt in human form._

Hey…..I resent that and when does a Sith Lord rely on Jedi techniques?

 _I rely on anything that gets the job done be it from the Jedi or the Sith. Since you neglected your studies all you have left to you is the Dark Side. Use it… let the anger build heat within you. Use that heat and burn away the sedative._

Wait a minute how do you know what's on Master Jax's holocron?

 _Unlike you, Phoenix, I studied my lessons and Master Jax had her holocron for a long time._

She let you study off her holocron? Hold on, if you know the technique then why don't you train me in it?

 _It doesn't work like that, Phoenix. I know it. You don't. And Sith Lords don't share their knowledge. You've got to learn it or discover it on your own. You can't become a stronger Jedi or Sith if I give you freebies._ _You've got to sink or swim on your own._ _You haven't exactly proven you're worthy of the heritage of the Jedi_ _or the Sith for that matter. Yet….I_ _suppose_ _that can't be entirely helped._

I think you're full of it, Darth Kath Crap. I also think you're lying. You can't possibly know Master Jax or know her holocron!

The voice laughed. _P_ _ _erhaps, but then you'll never know since….you're unconscious and heading towards certain death. Yet….your anger…..you are so close….use it….__

Wait….if I am unconscious, what does that make you? Are you walking around in my body while I am unaware?

 _Hmm….that's an interesting concept….unfortunately, no. Although….._

Crap….don't get any ideas Darth Kath Crap.

The voice laughed. _We have such brilliant ideas, Phoenix. We really ought to work with each other rather than being against each other._

'We' there is no 'we' Darth Kath Crap. You're a fracking foreign entity, you don't belong….

 _Really! Are you so sure of that?_

What?

The laughter filled my head, I groaned. Shut the frack up….

 _No, Phoenix. Not until you use the Dark Side._

Frack off…. Darth Kath Crap….

 _Have you ever considered the fact that you might be the foreign entity?_

What?

The laughter continued. I sighed, I wished Bastila were here or even Carth. What the frack had I gotten myself into? I sighed, meditation. I calmed myself ignoring Darth Kath Crap's mocking laughter and breathed. I began to chant a mantra. One that felt really old. I don't even think Master Zhar or the Masters had taught it to me. At least I didn't think they had. Yet, it came instinctively to me. It was as if I had used it before somewhere, some place, some time. It had failed me. Wait a minute, how did I know it failed me and where had I learned it? I felt confused. Where the heck was this coming from? No keep focusing on the chant and the mantra. _I am one with the Force and the Force is with me. I am one with the Force and the Force is with me._

* * *

A/N: Oh and I had planned on adding additional povs to this chapter but it just didn't flow right. I had some Mission stuff earlier tagged on here, but it just didn't feel right. It felt clunky. So ending on a bit of a non-ending/cliff hanger of sorts did. So….next chapter. Bastila and Juhani come to save Phoenix.


	47. Chapter 46:Tatooine:Meatbags United pt1

**Chapter 46: Tatooine: Meatbags United Part 1**

 **~HK-47~**

My lot in life was suffering and causing meatbags to suffer. My suffering was lessened thinking about all the ways I could dismember Yuka Laka. Dissolving him in a vat of acid seemed to please me, no….wait removing his vocal cords would be the most satisfying. I hated ithorese, it was annoying and grated on my processors. A jawa entered Yuka Laka's shop with an astromech.

The jawa yammered, "Droid trade. people of Iziz sell, trade. take trade droid."

The unit let out a rather indignant statement:: I have a master….::

I cocked my head, the tin can seemed very independent for an astromech.

Yuka Laka stated "Where is your master, droid?"

The droid beeped:: I have a master….she is….::

Yuka Laka snorted "I'll take him, but he needs a memory wipe."

The astromech let out a whine and then a shock arm came out and proceeded to shock the ithorian and the jawa. The jawa passed out on the floor. The astromech then managed to withdraw a weapon from its chassis and proceeded to shoot what looked to be a hold out blaster. It looked illegal. Whoever its master was, they had an eye for weapons and didn't care if they followed the law or not.

Yuka Laka dropped to the floor. He was still alive, too bad.

Statement: Astromech you seem a well constructed unit for a small tin can.

The droid beeped:: I am T3-M4. Not a tin can.::

Statement: You are small and resemble a garbage receptacle.

::Regardless I am neither. You look like a Systech model droid::

Proud statement: Affirmative, tin can. I am HK-47, a fully functional Systech Corporation droid skilled in both combat and protocol functions. Would your master purchase me?

The droid beeped quite a long drawn out statement:: My Master is the Jedi Padawan Phoenix Star, she was captured by the bounty hunter Calo Nord and a rodian named Grava Twiva. She sent me to find assistance. I must follow her orders, this is why your owner is on the floor and the jawa too.::

Incredulous statement: I do not care about the fool ithorian or what you did to him. I really wish you had killed the meatbag.

:: My owner left me no such command to kill the 'fool ithorian' and she requested assistance. Can you help me?::

Resigned statement: A Jedi. I suppose she would choose the disgusting path of peace and pacifism.

::My owner is a very capable warrior. She killed the Mandalorian Sherruk and Bendak Starkiller. She is not as overwhelmingly Jedi as you think she is::

Incredulous query: Are you bragging, tin can?

::Not bragging. Just stating facts. Here is her holo image::

The T3 unit displayed a dark short-haired, dark eyed, and fair skinned woman in Jedi padawan robes.

I looked at the holo image of the woman that had been displayed to me. My photo receptors processed her image. Her eyes were dark, powerful and strong. It indicated an individual of firmness. Her body was lean and muscular underneath her robes, indicating a woman of physical prowess. She looked like a woman who could easily deal out death and destruction despite the fact that she wore the disgusting robes of a Jedi. My processors quivered in anticipation. I needed this woman as my master. The only thing was how? She sadly wasn't here to buy me.

Statement: Yes, I think she would make a fine master to me. However, she must purchase me and you said she was captured so I cannot help you.

The T3 unit rolled over to the computer and I watched as he sliced into the database and recorded that I was purchased by Phoenix Star.

Incredulous statement: Tin can that does not work. If you surreptitiously put in that your owner purchased me. I would be forced to turn myself into the sector authorities. This programming was added to my system months ago.

:: Can that programming be removed?::

Objection: I would not advise that, tin can. There are safeguards present that… well, it should suffice to say that my systems have been altered plenty already.

The T3 unit let out a weary beep and then beeped::Hold on::

He went over to the computers and began to slice and transferred credits to Yuka Laka's account.

I doubted that his meatbag Jedi master had access to credits but how was I to know that?

The droid then beeped::Does this satisfy that requirement?::

Answer: Oh yes, tin can that more than suffices.

Query: Can you remove the restraining bolt, tin can?

The T3 unit went over to the restraining bolt and detached it.:: Now can we go? Our master is in real danger.::

Eager statement: Good. I look forward to splattering the meatbag innards of her enemies all over the dunes of Tatooine.

::You seem to take delight in bloodshed. That is not normal::

Incredulous Statement: Our meatbag master requires help and all you can say is that my primary function is not normal, you stupid bucket of bolts.

::It's not. Yet Phoenix needs help. You seem willing to help her. So lets go.::

Statement: Finally something we both can agree on, tin can. Take me to our meatbag master and her enemies.

The T3 unit began to exit the shop. I grabbed a weapon from Yuka Laka's shelves, a blaster rifle. I looked at Yuka Laka and aimed my blaster rifle and fired it at the prone ithorian.

Statement: Good bye fool ithorian.

The T3 unit beeped::Was that really necessary?::

Statement: No, but it was extremely satisfying.

The T3 unit beeped a wild stream of profound curses

Querying Statement: Shut up, you overweight glob of grease, I didn't question you over your slicing skills, did I?

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

My heart sunk in my chest. Revan, was in danger. How did she end up in this mess? She had been the Dark Lord of the Sith. Of course, she thought she was the smuggler named Phoenix Star. Perhaps the re-program had been a little too good. It seemed that Revan had forgotten she could access the Force and occasionally acted like she was Force blind. I was tempted to go out into Anchorhead, lightsaber blazing. It is what my heart wanted to do. I wanted to save Phoenix without fully thinking through my actions. This was something that was uniquely Phoenix and...well just as brash as Revan had been. I took a deep breath trying to center myself, I felt a bit off kilter which was due to the bond I had with Phoenix. She had been drunk and drugged. I was in no condition to go on my own to save her, no matter the personal feelings I had for her. My body was sluggish in response to what had happened to Phoenix. Of course, as soon as I informed Carth of the situation with Phoenix, he went storming out of the Hawk looking for answers along with Zaalbar who moaned that his lifedebt required that he go out and find answers along with Carth. Carth was doing what I really wanted to do. We both loved her. I slowly accepted that I would have to share my affections for her with Carth. I strangely didn't feel jealous like I once did.

Perhaps consummating our love gave me a new perspective that I had lacked before. I wasn't sure why such a physical action would make me feel differently. I would think I would feel even more jealous over what Carth and Phoenix shared but the reality of the situation was that Carth loved her and so did I and that wasn't going to change. Nor did it change the fact that Phoenix loved both of us and truthfully wanted to have a relationship with both of us. She would too, if it wasn't for the fact that Carth would have been incredible jealous and possessive over Phoenix having feelings for me. It was indeed a strange position to be in. Yet I felt oddly at peace with it. The bond we shared gave me a perspective that few might ever truly understand. However, I doubt Carth would share similar feelings. He would feel betrayed by her. I should not even be having these feelings or even thoughts. They were wrong and they betrayed the Jedi Code. Yet, I couldn't seem to help myself. I sighed and sat down in the kitchen area and waited for Carth and Zaalbar's return. They would find out the information that we needed and we would act accordingly.

Mission sat in the kitchen area looking rather downcast. I sat by her and slowly sipped on some caff trying to lift the hazy and muddled feeling I was experiencing from Phoenix.

She sighed. "Bastila….why did Nix decide to leave me and Zaalbar?"

I put a hand on the young twi'lek's shoulder. "As I told you earlier, Phoenix is going through a lot. This is a difficult time for her, she will be tempted by the Dark Side of the Force."

Mission nodded. "I know….she mentioned similar feelings of a sort to me earlier."

I raised an eyebrow. "What sort of feelings, Mission?"

Mission seemed hesitant in wanting to talk. She seemed unwilling to share what that was.

I sighed this could be important and I had to keep track of Revan and her feelings so I calmly called upon the Force and called upon it's persuasive power being brought forward. "You wish to tell me what these feelings are."

Mission spoke. "I wish to tell you what these feelings are. Nix believes she's possessed by the spirit of a dead Sith Lord. She had me and T3 go through the Jedi archives to download information regarding the Sith and I found some treatments. She wants to purge the Sith Lord from herself."

"Thank you Mission."

She merely nodded. "My head aches….I think I am going to lay down Bastila."

The twi'lek left the kitchen area and I took a measured breath. Phoenix really needed to know the truth. Her mind was an absolute mess. She thought she was possessed by a Sith Lord. I did not have to know who that Sith Lord was. The question was, why hadn't Phoenix said anything to me? Yet the answer echoed through the bond we shared. She is afraid.

I began to cry, I felt ashamed. What kind of Order allowed Revan to be stripped of her past and have her go around afraid of the shade of her memory?

Canderous entered the room and snorted. "Okay Jedi princess….spill it."

I dried my eyes and I frowned. "Spill what, Mandalorian?"

"Who is she?"

"Who is what?"

"Phoenix….who is she? We've been practicing together and things don't add up. For one thing how does a Deralian know Echani martial arts? That is a specialized form of training. I fought several of Revan's troops and Jedi that knew that form of training. She also seems to know a lot about certain things….such as the last words Revan spoke to my people at the death of Mandalore. I know the Republic filmed it….but Phoenix knew the words verbatim. Why would a Deralian memorize the words of the Knight Revan?"

"Go away….Mandalorian." A headache was throbbing in my head as he spoke.

"I can stand here all day, Bastila. And I can tell you and her….well...seeing how you look like a rancor stomped all over you." He suddenly laughed. "You fracked each other, didn't you?"

I said nothing. He sat down next to me. "Hmm….this makes things interesting. Maybe if you don't tell me who she is….I'll tell Carth that you two have been intimate with each other."

I grasped his hand. "Don't! For Phoenix's sake, please don't!"

He grinned. "Ahh…so who is she?"

"I hate you Mandalorian."

He laughed. "Hate? I thought a Jedi wasn't suppose to 'hate.' But enough talk. Who is Phoenix?"

I debated whether or not to use the Force on him as I had on Mission but I was tired and found I honestly didn't care anymore. Plus I wasn't exactly in the best of moods, my body ached and my mind throbbed with the bond I had with Revan and I didn't exactly have to tell the truth. Besides Juhani hadn't been told the full truth from the council about Revan either.

"She was a Dark Jedi under Revan's command during the Mandalorian wars. When I was assigned to take down Revan. She fought near her master's side. I couldn't save Revan but I managed to save her. Her mind was damaged but seeing how close she was to Revan and his command. We believe she has knowledge that can save the Republic. Her mind was damaged, Canderous. We overlaid a new memory over her old mind."

He glared at me. "That's a dirty trick, Bastila. No wonder she left the ship like she did. She's all fracked in the head and that allowed Calo to capture her. Plus you fracked her. You're sick, Bastila. Absolutely sick and you have no honor."

I sighed, I felt broken inside. "Please don't tell her…."

He snorted "And why shouldn't I? She has the right to know, Jedi princess."

"Perhaps I should contact the Republic and tell them we have a Mandalorian general aboard our ship guilty of various war crimes. I am sure a search of the nets on the Mandalorian General Canderous Ordo would bring up a lot of your past indiscretions."

"What of it, Jedi princess? I am proud of my actions. I have nothing to be ashamed of, unlike you. Nor do I fear death. Plus….I am sure the Republic would be interested to hear that you're harboring one of Revan's Dark Jedi. Sorry, Bastila I've been playing this game a lot longer than you have. I am going to tell her, she deserves that honor as a warrior of the Mandalorian wars."

I stood up bringing all of the Force to bear. "You will not say anything…..about this to Phoenix."

I watched as Canderous snorted. "Nice try, Jedi princess. I am Mandalorian. I do not bend to your Force powers."

I looked thoughtful, perhaps I needed to try a different tact on this. I called upon the Force once again. "You will not say anything to Phoenix till I tell her first."

The Mandalorian's gaze softened. "Tell you what princess...I won't say anything till you tell her first."

I sighed, success of a sort. It was a gentle persuade and it seemed to work on Canderous a lot easier than a full persuade and perhaps it succeeded because it flowed with an odd sense of Mandalorian honor. It was my responsibility to tell Phoenix. Yet, I was bound by the Order and the Order had told me not to say anything. So it would be a long time before I had to say anything to Phoenix about the "Sith spirit" that seemed to haunt her.

Canderous then said, "I am tired of sitting around here like one of these damn gizka that Phoenix had brought on here." He went over to one of the gizka and suddenly took a Mandalorian dagger to it and gutted it open more in frustration than in cruelty. He suddenly laughed as he hoisted up a blaster part from it's bloodied body. He cocked his head and then gutted another gizka and pulled out a power cell.

"Looks like we found the reason why Phoenix had these gizka brought on board. Now that's a clue….she must have had business done with one the traders or perhaps even Czerka. I am going to go hunt down who sold her out to Calo and Calo is going to wish he never set eyes on Phoenix Star. You may be sick at heart, Jedi Princess, but a warrior's job is never done, they carry on; even the Jedi Revan knew this."

I cringed at his mention of Revan and he left me and I sighed. I sat and quietly drunk the caff. I was still struggling to try and get the muddled drugged feeling out of my system. I began to worry more and more about Phoenix. I felt nothing through our bond. She still was unconscious and drugged. I grabbed my lightsaber. I had sat around enough and Canderous was right it did not do any good to sit here while Phoenix ended up captured, dead, or even worse.

I walked up to the Mandalorian. "You are right, Canderous. I feel terrible but...I am concerned about Phoenix. I am having troubles feeling her through our bond. I still feel drugged and if I am feeling drugged then so is she."

He grinned at me. "I knew I could get you moving, Jedi Princess. You're bonded to her and you obviously have an emotional attachment to her….maybe….is it possible if you focus deeper you could track her."

I sighed. "It is possible. It would require very deep meditation on my part. Almost as deep as my battle meditation. It would take some time and it also puts me in a very vulnerable position. Would you protect me Mandalorian if someone should come and attack me?"

He shouldered his rifle. "I'll do it, but not for you, princess. I'll do it for Phoenix….by the way what is her name. Her real name?"

I looked thoughtful, Revan was Revan, other than the fact that her last name was Ravenheart and I knew through the bond that Carth called Phoenix his little Raven. Apparently, Revan had done a really good job obliterating her past or Carth was so in love with her he was blind to the nickname Phoenix had given him. I tried to think of the names of those Jedi who had gone off with Revan and gave one.

"Akume Dreamsong."

Canderous nodded. "Akume… a strong name."

I folded my legs and assumed a meditative posture. I reached out with the Force and went towards the bond that I had with Revan. My senses cut off from the rest of the universe and focused purely on the bond.

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

I had left the ship on my own without telling Bastila and the others when I had found out about what had happened to Phoenix. I was a loner. I could understand Phoenix's desire for space. It had mirrored my own desires when I had succumbed to the Dark Side. I felt like I could probably get further on my own without Carth and Zaalbar. I proceeded to go to the cantina but so much for doing my own investigation because I ran into Carth and Zaalbar.

Carth scowled at me. "Juhani, I thought you were back on the Hawk looking after Bastila. She looks like hell."

I sighed. "Carth, do you honestly think Bastila would let herself be looked after?"

Carth paused and looked like he couldn't answer. I smiled softly. "No, she would not. My skills are best served helping you find Phoenix."

I sniffed around the cantina and I said calmly. "I can smell her….I bet the wookiee can as well."

Zaalbar moaned something I couldn't understand but he nodded at my statement. I looked at Carth. "I believe that Zaalbar is saying he can smell her as well."

Carth frowned. "I didn't know cathar had a strong sense of smell."

I sighed. "We do not often talk of it. Sadly, my family did not teach me it's full usage and I went a good portion of my life blind to it's use. I could smell small things but...my skill was limited. However my Master Quatra did teach me how to use it. It is part of our warrior's sense. We are a predatory race, Carth Onasi. A strong sense of smell helps us track prey and bring down our enemies."

Carth looked intrigued. "Really….so if Phoenix has a scent about her. What does she smell like?"

I chuckled lightly. "She has a musky spicy smell to her. It is a very exotic scent. Every sentient has their own unique scent. You for instance, you smell a bit like the Hawk as well as half a dozen other ships. It seems that you exude the scent of the ships you fly. Plus you have a slight smoky smell about you that is individually yours. You also have a hint of Phoenix's smell on you. You are close to her, are you her mate, Carth?"

Carth sighed and then nodded. "You're very astute Juhani. I just…..well I know how the Jedi are about….such things."

"And it is not my business to get involved. You love who you love, Carth. I too have a special someone but I left them back on Dantooine. She was deeply upset that I went off on this mission. She could not understand why I would tie myself to…." I paused. "There is much destiny and hope placed on Phoenix, Carth. I feel honored that the Masters allowed me to join this mission. But enough talk about this…."

I went up to the bartender and took a deep inhale of his scent. He had the smell of many sentients on them but I accentuated the Force and my senses and I could smell Phoenix had been here. I said firmly. "Where did the dark haired one go?"

The bartender looked at me. "Which one? I have had several 'dark haired' individuals come by here."

"The one dressed like a Jedi. The one you no doubt plied with drinks. Where is she?"

The bartender shrugged. "Oh that one….yea..I know...but it's going to cost you."

I hissed a bit and ignited my lightsaber, "It is not wise to cross blades with a Jedi or demand payment from them."

The bartender cowed. "I should have figured she had Jedi partners with her. Look….that damn rodian she was with. He had it in for her. He paid me to lace her drinks with a powerful sedative. Not sure what it was, I didn't ask. I am not a medic, I am a bartender. All I know is that they were talking about Czerka, wookiee slaves here on this planet, and the bounty hunter Calo Nord."

With that statement, Zaalbar suddenly growled and glared at the bartender. He frowned. "I am sorry what did the wookiee say? I have no understanding of their grunts and growls."

I sighed and tapped into the Force feeling Zaalbar's anger and the tone of his language. "He is upset that you talk about his people, here on this planet. He…." I paused, "is upset that the shame of Czerka spreads to even this planet."

I looked at Zaalbar. "Be at peace, Zaalbar. We will find your wookiee kin and we will free them from Czerka's taint." I could understand all too well Zaalbar's anger. I too had tasted, however briefly the taint of being a slave. I would do what 'Phoenix' had done all those years ago on Taris to me. I would liberate Zaalbar's people from slavery here on Tatooine.

I then said firmly to the bartender. "Where did the rodian take the Jedi?"

He shrugged. "No idea. She was pretty dazed after all those drinks. She shattered one of my cups. She tried to fight the rodian but her strikes were pretty sloppy. You'd have to ask the rodian."

"And where do we find this rodian?"

"His name is Grava Twiva. He claims he is an independent contractor for Czerka goods."

I nodded. The phrase independent could mean anything. "In other words he handles questionable goods that Czerka doesn't wish known to the authorities."

The bartender chuckled. "More or less."

* * *

 **~Rama Yaktal~**

Calo dropped the prone and unconscious Revan by my feet. Our meeting spot was by a raided and burned out sand crawler. "I am impressed bounty hunter. I didn't think you'd survive this. Apparently I underestimated you or I underestimated Revan's damaged condition."

I looked at Revan and shook my head. "You've become weak, my Lord."

I ignited my lightsaber blade. "I really ought to kill you. To think I could gain Malak's favor….simply by a single stroke of my lightsaber."

Yes….I would do so. My key to become part of Malak's Sith Empire was within my reach. I no longer needed to follow Admiral Karath. He was a fool. A fool to follow a woman who was a shell of her former self.

My blade went forward to strike Revan's head from her body when another lightsaber ignited and Omni's blade blocked mine.

"You will not touch her….she is Lord Revan!"

I laughed. "You're a fool….Echani dog."

Calo's rifle came forward. "I am with the Echani on this….I get more money with Revan alive….not dead."

I laughed. "You get paid regardless, bounty hunter scum."

"I still get paid more from Admiral Karath….."

"So it is true….an Echani fool and a washed out bounty hunter would dare challenge me."

Calo snorted. "I am hardly washed out and I will not have you kill my bounty."

"So be it….my path to Malak's favor is within my grasp and I will not be stopped by two insolent fools."

Omni interjected. "This is madness Rama and you know it. Revan will return for revenge...you should sense that. The Force has spared her life for a reason. I can sense it….I feel the wave of conflict and confrontation and it must be satisfied. It is the way of the Force and the way of the Echani to let this play out and I will stop you, even if it means my life."

"So be it Echani slave…."

Calo and Omni stood together. Calo with blaster drawn and Omni with his lightsaber he pushed another button on his lightsaber and the single blade became a double blade. Ahh….the Echani was clever, he had hidden his true potential from me in that he had hid the dual blade from my eyes.

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

I kept my sensors on that HK droid. I did not fully trust it. He seemed to be programmed for murderous rampage. What kind of sentient programmed the thing to begin with? However, I recognized I needed a combat based droid to mount an appropriate rescue of Phoenix and it needed to be done promptly and quickly. HK-47 was the nearest help available plus I doubt he'd let the Jawas apprehend me as property again. I had placed a tracer on Phoenix at the cantina. I wanted to make sure I did not lose her. I did not trust the rodian. He seemed much too willing to buy Phoenix drinks. Sentients that bought drinks like that had clear ulterior motives.

We made it to the gate. A Czerka man stood by the gate. "I am sorry….you two need a hunting license from your master to get past this doorway."

HK-47 stood with his blaster charging. Statement: Powering weapons….you will let us by meatbag. Our master is already out there.

The Czerka man said. "Kill me and you'll have have the authorities breathing down your master's neck."

I beeped::Power down...Meatbag killer. I can handle this.::

Incredulous query: And what is your plan garbage can? Do you plan on beeping your way through this?

::Trust me. I can handle this.::

I opened myself to the nets and sliced into the Czerka mainframe and downloaded a hunting license that was kept in the Czerka records and listed the name as Phoenix Star. I displayed it to the Czerka representative the license displayed Phoenix's name. Although the picture had a different picture on it. The image of the woman was of a red-haired woman with green eyes. Of course, the Phoenix I knew wasn't Phoenix. Bastila no doubt would have gone into a tirade if she saw this picture. Why? Revan was memory wiped. Did it matter? Humans were so irrational.

The Czerka rep nodded. "I see….well good hunting out there. Your master, by the way, isn't the only one to hunt with droids.

Weary resignation: You are no fun, bucket of bolts.

:: You really need to think before you power your weapons, Meatbag killer. What good will you be to Phoenix if we are confiscated by the authorities? Plus there is plenty to kill out on the dunes of Tatooine. There are Sand People, various predators, etc. You will get your dose of blood letting if that is what you really want.::

Statement: I hope you are correct in your assessment, tin can. I simply want to fulfill my primary function and you denying it makes me twitch in mechanical agony.

::Your original programmer really needed to program you with restraint and discretion::

Statement: Oh I have restraint and discretion, tin can. It's just been soooo long since I've killed someone or something.

::I see….you need a memory wipe.::

Indignant statement: Mention that statement again, overweight glob of grease and I will take up my pent up aggression on you.

::I only gave my assessment as to why I think you need….maintenance. I did not ask for verbal abuse. But let's go save our master.::

Statement: Yes, let us go save the master.

* * *

A/N: I was planning on one chapter but….somehow ending with T3 pov with HK…..seems to fit well as a stopping point. So this will be a two part chapter. Hope you like HK. And yea...I couldn't resist pairing HK and T3 together and have T3 buy HK. It made the chapter a bit more tricky but interesting...but HK and T3 well they are like yin and yang, they go together. :) And looks like I am going to have more time to update….I am unemployed yet again. Darn it! Oh and just to let you know. I revised the last chapter. A bit more personal thoughts about Phoenix being pregnant from Carth. I also added some more action with Phoenix being drugged and a few plot holes I noticed which I filed. Thanks go to Ether and Kosiah being my constant reviewers. I'd still write because...what can I say this is fun.


	48. Chapter 47 Tatooine:Meatbags United pt2

**Chapter 47: Tatooine: Meatbags United Part 2**

 **~Phoenix~**

 _"_ _ _Your majesty, we must get you to safety and away from the Mandalorians."__

 _ _Queen__ _ _Talia__ _ _shook her head. "Knight Revan, I thank you for your concern but I am not leaving Iziz."__

 _ _Revan sighed behind his mask. "They will try to kill you and set up a puppet ruler. Someone who will support the Mandalorian occupation of Onderon."__

 _"_ _ _They are just as likely to do that with my absence, Knight Revan."__

 _ _Revan shook his head. "You represent the future of Onderon, your majesty. I cannot afford for you to be killed. However, I would be careful of your cousin, General Vaklu. He may support the resistance for now….but he is a very opportunistic man. He could turn on you in a moments notice. The Mandalorians could capture him and easily convince him to become a puppet ruler in your stead. Not everything about the Mandalorians is about testing themselves against us. There is a political agenda to be gained. There is something….about this war….and I am not sure what that is….as of yet. The Order, are too afraid to find out what that is. But I will find it out, even if I have to fight and kill Mandalore, himself. However, If I were you I would…." Revan paused a moment. "I would send Vaklu and his resistance followers to the heart of the heaviest combat. If he dies….he will become a symbol of Onderonian independence. Your people will respect and honor him. Yet….his death will keep him from being a threat to you now and in the future."__

 _ _Talia__ __c__ _ _ringed. "But...he's my cousin, Knight Revan. I cannot….I will not think of him in such a manner. He has been nothing but loyal to me and our cause."__

 _"_ _ _As you wish. Yet I am all too familiar with men and even women like your cousin. However, I have come in nothing more than an advisory role to you and Onderon. I give you the support of the Republic."__

 _ _Talia sighed. "I truly wish Master Kavar decided to join up with you, Knight Revan. We could have used him. As an Onderonian Jedi Master, his support would have meant so much to us.__

 _"_ _ _He chose to support the council, your majesty. He chose to abandon us, but….not his student. His skills are just as worthy. Liam Mandrell learned and studied under Master Kavar and I have assigned him to protect you and your planet. He is a good and fair man and I speak from personal experience regarding him. His desire to protect the Republic is as strong as mine. As an Onderonian, he believes in the future of Onderon the same as I do. Assign him where you wish. If you wish him to defend Iziz, he will defend Iziz. If you wish him to mount an offensive on Dxun, he will go. He is loyal to me and will be loyal to you. He will also have a contingent of Republic Soldiers to protect Onderon. Although the final decision is yours, I recommend that they are to be used as an offensive on Dxun. True victory on Onderon means driving the Mandalorians from Dxun."__

 _ _Talia__ _ _nodded. "I will follow your advisement, Knight Revan." She paused a moment then spoke. "Are the rumors true, that you are Onderonion, Knight Revan?"__

 _ _Revan bowed before the Queen. "I am the Republic, Queen Talia. I am Coruscanti, Tarisian, Telosian, and even Echani. But...today I am Onderonian. Tomorrow I will be from Serroco. I belong to all the worlds, your highness. So in the end, my heritage, and the planet of my origins, they are nothing. I represent the needs, wants and desires of all in the Republic threatened by the Mandalorians. Be strong, your highness, we will drive the Mandalorians from your home till they are nothing more than a memory."__

 _ _The Onderonian queen smiled. "Your words inspire me, Knight Revan. I have no doubt that we will drive the Mandalorians from our planet."__

 _ _::Phoenix::__

 _ _::Phoenix!::__

 _ _::Bastila?::__

 _ _::You are unconscious. It's taken me awhile to break through the drugged fog. Do you know where you are?::__

 _ _::Umm not really. I fell into Calo Nord's arms and I've been unconscious and then I had a vision of Revan's past. And….I had a neural inhibitor around me::__

Okay that wasn't entirely true, why are you lying to Bastila? _Yo_ _ _u don't trust her.__ _W_ hat? We made love to each other, that should guarantee some sense of trust. What the frack? Why don't you trust her? _She_ _ _'s hiding things from you. So you don't have to tell her every fracking thing!__

Darth Kath Crap is that you?

No answer. Err….okay….so why did Darth Kath Crap sound oddly like the internalization of my own thoughts? Because those doubts in my mind, sounded exactly like what Darth Kath Crap would say. Or have I already fallen to the Dark Side and I don't know it. I think I would know if I had fallen….or maybe it was the damn fog of the Dark Side that the masters always kept harping about. Why did I have such doubts? Such fears and reservations? Was there something fracking wrong with me?

Wait a minute, I was suppose to be Force blind due to the inhibitor, how could I have Force visions if I had an inhibitor around me? I tested my connection to the Force. It was there….what the frack? Either I was pushing past it or….someone had taken it off my neck? If I pushed past it then begrudgingly Darth Kath Crap was right, I was stronger than the piece of technology around my neck. That was highly irregular. I preferred the second theory, someone had taken the collar off my neck. Why? I'd rather that damn Sith spirit be wrong for a change. The fact that the damn spirit was right about me being able to reach past the inhibitor scared me. I want nothing to do with that fracking spirit. It had been a bother ever since Taris. Yet eerily the thought came to my mind. _You would be dead if you hadn't listened to them. You can't ignore them forever. The Sith spirit is a part of you, like it or not._

 _::What did you see, Phoenix?::_

 _::You didn't see it?::_

 _::No...I suspect the sedatives you were given blocked out the vision from me.::_

 _::Or the inhibitor, Bastila. But anyway….I saw Revan assigning Liam Mandrell to protect Queen_ _Talia_ _and Onderon.::_

Part of me wondered why I was having a dream vision of Revan during the Mandalorian wars. What gives? This made no sense. Unless it was the lesson of the double cross. Grava had double crossed me. Revan had sought to use a double cross against Vaklu. Yet….that was a far stretch. _Unless…..think Phoenix….think….._

 _This vision started with me chanting my mantra and….Darth Kath Crap_

 _Darth Kath Crap is…._

My head started to throb even worse….damn it…...my head. I feel sick…..and dizzy.

 _::Phoenix are you alright?::_

 _::I think I am going to be sick….::_

 _::It's probably the drugs and….hangover. You did tell me you drunk four cups of juma juice. Seriously Phoenix, you should not be drin….::_

 _::Bastila….I am unconscious and Malak and Saul Karath want me and you want to bitch about my drinking habits. Ummm no offense but you really need to get your priorities in order.::_

Bastila sighed _::You're right. I apologize. We will have time to talk about this when we retrieve you. I sense you are somewhere on Tatooine. I still have to focus on the location. But as soon as I feel the location from our bond….we will be coming. Do not worry, and Calo….well he will….::_

I frowned _::Pay? Bastila….it's my fault. I should have been more aware of my surroundings and the people I was associating with. I….well I trusted Grava. He was an old business associate of mine. Do not seek vengeance on my account, tempting as that may be.::_

No, Bastila. Let Calo go but Grava is mine! I will deal with him. Darth Kath Crap was right. Nothing would please me more then to gut and fry the damn little bastard. Damn it Phoenix, get those thoughts out of your head. Revenge is of the Dark Side. Yet, there was only so much I could take from Grava, I wasn't a damn kath hound to be kicked around either.

Bastila sighed. _::You're right I am afraid you are a much better Jedi than I have been.::_

 _::Yea, If I was a better Jedi….I wouldn't have gotten captured by Calo Nord or….taken advantage of you Bastila.::_

 _::You didn't take advantage of me, Phoenix. I...what we did….we ….well I….::_

I sighed.: _:I don't know if I am worthy of your affections, Bastila. but enough talk...try and find me. I have no idea where I am….and have you seen T3? I sent him for help.::_

 _::No, he has not come back to the Hawk for help. I am afraid that he may have been stolen or destroyed and used for spare parts.::_

 _::Hmm…..I don't think….well...T3 is a tough little droid. I don't believe he would let himself become destroyed or become stolen either.::_

 _::I think you put way too much trust on that droid, Phoenix.::_

 _I chuckled::He got us through the Sith base on Taris so….yea...I do trust that little droid. He's got spunk and he's got spirit.::_

 _::Regardless I would not put my whole trust on T3, no matter how resourceful he is.::_

* * *

 **~Omni Khan~**

I yanked the neural inhibitor off Revan's neck with the Force. "Wake up…..Lord Revan….wake up…."

Rama laughed as she pressed her advantage against me with her lightsaber. "She is not Lord Revan, Omni….she is a smuggler named Phoenix Star."

"It does not matter Rama….be she Phoenix Star or Revan Ravenheart, she is still the same. Already she is aware of the Force, it is only a matter of time…. Revan will reclaim her heritage."

Rama growled in pain as blaster bolts hit her in the arm. To be precise, three blaster bolts hit Rama in the arm, two blaster bolts first and then the other single bolt. Apparently my talking distracted her.

Calo held his blasters and he looked around. Where had the other bolt had come from?

We all turned to look to find a rusty red droid coming over the dunes, followed by an astromech droid.

Statement: You will surrender my master or I assure you your death will be far more painful than it should be.

I turned towards the droid. "I am on your master's side…although I will not surrender her. She is coming with me, she belongs to the Dark Side and Admiral Karath."

The astromech beeped and I frowned. The droid then proceeded to translate for me the beeps of the astromech.

Translation: The garbage can states that you cannot have her. She is not a droid and not a possession that can be owned.

Statement: I am inclined to agree with my smaller counter part. No one owns the master. Surrender her or die.

I heard a groan from the ground and I looked to find Revan slowly coming to and rising from the ground. "Whatever they said….I am not going with anyone."

She held her head and her eyes looked bloodshot. "Ugh….no more juma …..no more juma."

Statement: It is a pleasure to see you alive, master."

She turned toward the droid. "Who the hell are you?"

Statement: I am HK-47, but your faithful little garbage can sought out the help you requested. He acquired my assistance.

The T3 droid beeped and she smiled lightly. "I knew I could count on you T3."

She turned and looked at me with my lightsaber ignited, Rama with her lightsaber, and Calo Nord with his blasters drawn. She looked towards her belt clearly looking for her lightsaber. "Damn it…." She dropped into a clear Echani stance.

"I am not going with anyone….even if I am unarmed….I am not going…."

I bowed lightly before her. "You are confused…..your…."

She glared at me and Rama. "You are Dark Jedi….and I am not going to be taken either to Malak or Admiral Karath."

Rama laughed. "See Omni….you've picked the wrong side."

I kept my lightsaber at the ready. "Perhaps, but I stand by my decision. She will face Malak and I will stand by her."

Revan's eyebrow raised. "Uhh….."

The droid said to her, Statement: Get behind me master, I will blast your enemies for you.

Revan backed away and stood behind the droid.

"Normally I'd say no, ummm... HK-47, but I feel like a ronto stomped all over my head."

Statement: Master….it is only my pleasure to serve you and I will splatter their meatbag innards all over the dunes.

She stated firmly. "Don't kill them. I want them alive….if possible."

The droid's vocabulator changed in frequency and tone. Incredulous statement: But master they want to kill or maim you if you don't go with them.

"Yea….that's why I don't want them dead. There's got to be a reason they want me dead or maimed if I don't go with them and there's an old quote about dead men not telling tales. Well I want to know what the frack they want with me."

Statement: I will submit to your impeccable judgment, master. If you wish, I will initiate appropriate interrogation measures afterwards.

"Good….do that." She kept herself behind the droid. She looked terrible, it was clear she was in obvious pain, even though she kept herself in an Echani stance. It verified my assessment all along. Revan was there, she might not know who she was but there was something of the old Sith Master that still existed. She would fight Malak and she would reclaim her heritage.

I calmly walked behind the droid and Revan quickly dropped me to the ground. Her Echani strike to my legs caught me off guard because I wasn't looking for it. I honestly didn't think Lord Revan would attack me in such a manner. I had assumed she would know me. Yet, sadly she didn't. She glared at me. "What kind of Dark Jedi are you? You are either fracked in the head or something…. I told you before I am not going with you. You can fight by my side if your damn Echani honor demands it, but I am not going with you. HK-47….if this Echani makes any move against me, you have my permission to blast him. Oh one more thing…."

She grabbed my lightsaber. It had fallen from my hands when she had pinned me to the ground. She twirled it a bit and looked at it. She quietly managed to pulled it apart into two blades. I cocked my head in curiosity, I had never shown my lightsaber's unique function to anyone except….Revan. If she was supposedly a shell as Rama put it, she would not have known that that function existed.

She handed me the other lightsaber hilt. "Thank you Echani. I wouldn't normally give you back your lightsaber….but….if you're fighting with me….then….I guess you're going to need it."

Oh Revan was there….I just had to be careful around her. She could kill me...even telling her she was Revan….she could kill me. Her presence felt erratic and chaotic to me. What existed of her mind an obvious jumble. Was she insane? Or was she Revan and the persona that Rama mentioned, the persona of Phoenix Star? I honestly couldn't tell. Regardless, I could feel her raw power and that was familiar.

Rama was blind. She couldn't sense what I sensed. Perhaps she wasn't as attuned as I was to the Force's combative flow. A confrontation was coming. I trembled before it. The Force would not be mocked. Revan would be given the chance to confront her apprentice and it would be such a wonderful expression of Revan's intentions. Revan's combat would echo through the Force and say without words the pure manifestation of conflict that all Echani knew.

The combat droid announced to Revan, Statement: Oh Master….your command sends tingles through my behavior core.

Rama hissed at me. "Traitor…."

I laughed. "I am not the traitor…..Rama. You are and I will see you dead for it."

Calo Nord sighed. "Damn it all….having Dark Jedi with me was a fracking mistake." He turned towards Rama. "You're dead….then the Echani and the droids. As for my bounty, like it or not...you're coming with me to Admiral Karath."

Revan snorted. "Don't count on it Calo Nord….I told the Echani I wasn't going with him and I am most assuredly not going with you."

She held firmly onto my red lightsaber blade. Her face scrunched up with a very determined look upon her face.

The combat droid then stated, Statement: Oh yes…..it looks like I am going to have fun after all! Powering weapons…

* * *

 ** **~Mission~****

Everyone was doing something. Even Bastila. I saw her meditating with Canderous. I got sick of being left behind. Nix needed me. So I walked out of the ship. Okay, so Bastila might have gotten upset. Yet, I was getting kind of tired of her. She kept moping about Nix and she wanted me to tell her about….

I gasped and my hands curled up in anger. What the frack happened? Did I seriously piss Bastila off? Did she not understand that Nix and I had pinky and headtail swear trust? I had broken my trust with Nix. I went back onto the ship.

I went up to Bastila, my fists clinched in anger. "Bastila…."

Canderous stated. "Hey Blue….you need to be quiet….Bastila is trying to find Phoenix in the Force."

I snorted. "Canderous….this is way beyond finding Nix. Look...I swore to Nix I wouldn't tell anyone about something and Bastila made me spill my guts."

Canderous looked at Bastila and raised an eyebrow. "Looks like I may have underestimated the Jedi Princess after all."

"Humpf! So glad you admire Bastila for her Force use. It still doesn't change the fact she violated my friendship and trust. And if she violated my trust….who's to say she won't violate yours as well."

"Look kid….I've got bigger cannok to fry than you being insulted that Bastila used the Force on you. Advantage is advantage and if I had access to the Force, I'd use it. It didn't stop Revan and I think you're upset because you don't have the same advantage."

I rolled my eyes. "Look chuba face….I am not upset over not having the Force. It's how it was used on me."

Bastila suddenly rose up from her meditation. "I have found her Canderous….she's out on the dunes. I saw the place in a vision. It's…."

I glared at Bastila. "Bastila…."

She sighed. "Mission we don't have time for this. We have to rescue Phoenix and...we'll talk about this later."

I put my hands on my hips. "Fine….but mark my words, Bastila we're not done here."

Canderous, Bastila, and I walked out of the Hawk. We needed to find Carth, Zaalbar and Juhani and then get out on the dunes to find Nix.

Canderous commed Carth. (Carth, this is Canderous….Bastila has found Phoenix. We need to head out on the dunes.)

Carth responded (Alright...but there is or rather there was a slight problem….we had to have some sort of hunting license to get out on the dunes. Juhani has promised to work with Czerka so we can get that hunting license.)

Juhani took the comm (I am disgusted that I have to work with this Czerka filth. They want me to kill the tribal chieftain of the Sand People to stop the Wookiee slaves and what's left of the miners from being killed. I would have said no….but at this time we knew we had no choice. The filthy little rodian that sold out Phoenix…..he offered that choice to us so we could save her.)

I snorted and grabbed the comm from Canderous' hands (Let me get this straight….so the filthy little hutt-slug that sold Nix out to Calo said we can get her back by working with Czerka. Gee….I say no deal!)

Juhani sighed. (Mission, I am not fond of working with a double-crossing womp rat but...it's our only way to find Phoenix and….well Zaalbar threatened to rip his arms off if he didn't help us and I waved my lightsaber around saying I'd slice him into neat little shreds if he didn't either.)

Bastila grabbed the comm (Juhani…..you didn't!)

(I didn't say I was going to. You know simply waving a lightsaber around does tend to get results. It's not the Dark Side if you don't intend to act on it. I had no intention of acting on that threat….but the rodian didn't know that.)

(You're playing a dangerous game, Juhani. Even the threat of force can lead to the Dark Side.)

I glared at Bastila. "Yea….you're a fine one to talk, Bastila."

Bastila ignored me and Juhani spoke (Regardless….our goal was accomplished and we will meet you at the Achorhead gate.)

(Very well….Bastila Shan out….)

* * *

 ** **~Carth~****

Finally, it was about bloody time, getting down to business in rescuing Phoenix. Tracking down the damn rodian that had sold my little Raven out. I was ready to blast his damn brains out. Poor Phoenix, betrayed by an alien that according to Bastila and by the bartender had been a friend and business partner to her. Damn it! Was their no end to betrayals?! Yet, Juhani had stayed my hand. She stated to me that eventually the rodian would suffer from his own actions and choices. I snorted but then chuckled lightly as Zaalbar threaten to rip his arms off and Juhani threatened to dice him up with her lightsaber.

Nice….maybe there were benefits traveling with a wookiee and a Jedi after all. I wasn't sure about Juhani though, telling me not to blow the rodian's brains out and then threatening to dice him up. Maybe that was simply the cathar side of her heritage coming out. Frankly, I think most sentients were a bit nervous around cathar. They weren't known as gentle pussycats. It was a real shame that their planet had been devastated by the Mandalorians.

Zaalbar stood around munching on some sort of food he had gotten from a food vendor somewhere. I wasn't exactly sure what it was. It looked oddly like roasted gizka. Damn Phoenix and those damn gizka. Roasted gizka actually didn't sound like such a bad idea, seeing how the damn Hawk was now inundated with the damn things.

As we waited for Bastila, Mission, and Canderous. I said calmly. "Juhani were you raised on Cathar?"

She sighed. "No….I never knew my homeworld. Whatever stories I know of my homeworld I heard from my parents or from Master Quatra. Like you, Carth. My planet was devastated. My parents were force to flee Cathar. I have no memory of my home, I was but a babe in my mother's arms when they left the homeworld."

I nodded. "That had to be tough….Juhani. I mean for your parents, having to flee their home with you in their arms."

"It was."

"Tell me...did they think having you during times of war and hardship was worth it?"

She looked thoughtful. "My mother loved me, Carth. She provided for me when times were very hard. She sacrificed her life for me, but then I believe that all mothers would try their best to provide for their children even in the most difficult times. Why do you ask, Carth?"

I sighed. "What if I told you, I was thinking about becoming a father again?"

She chuckled. "With your mate, Phoenix, I assume. Yes…this would be a very bad time to have a child. But if the Force wishes it….then it will be so. If not….then it will not be. Do not worry, Carth. If having a legacy with her is what matters to you….then you will have it. However, Phoenix is a very complicated person to be a mate with. I would learn all you can about her before committing to such a thing."

I frowned. "You sound like Bastila. She said something similar to me and her back on Dantooine. What is it about her that you and Bastila are warning me about?"

Juhani looked hesitant and then said. "Jedi are not supposed to fall in love. Yet….Phoenix and you clearly have feelings for each other and have become mates. Jedi are not supposed to have children. If you have offspring….then she will be banished from the Order. The last Jedi Master who had a child…well….she was one of Revan's teachers and when the birth was found out, she was ousted. She eventually joined Revan in his war against the Mandalorians."

I sighed. "Then it's best for Phoenix not to have children."

Juhani shook her head. "I did not say that, Carth. It is just harder for the Order to accept such things. Just make sure if you commit to such a thing with her then you need to be certain that it is for the right reasons and to know that both of you wish to commit to it fully. I am not unhappy about my upbringing, Carth. It was difficult and full of much hardship. Although...I doubt my parents had to worry about searching for Star Maps and being targeted by a Sith Lord."

I nodded. "That's true…it's just that...well….Phoenix and I….well I think she might be….it's not like we didn't try to keep it from happening….but...there was one moment and….I think I lost my mind….and well...I don't know what happened and well…she may be pregnant but if she is….she sure doesn't act like she cares….I mean….drinking….what kind of irresponsible person does that?"

Juhani answered. "She may not even be aware of being pregnant, Carth. Like I said….how much do you know about Phoenix and her past?"

"She was born on Deralia ….and her parents and family were wiped out by the Mandalorians….but….I…." I sighed. "Okay….fair point I don't know a whole heck of a lot about her aside from that."

Juhani sighed. "Then you should spend more time getting to know her on a deeper level, Carth. Her parents, her siblings, her childhood, her upbringing. If you wish to be a fully involved mate with her and share a life with her then you are going to have to know more about her than just that."

I nodded and finally Bastila, Canderous, and Mission arrived. Mission was looking thoroughly peeved off and she was glaring at Bastila with clear vibrodaggers in her eyes. What did Bastila do to piss Mission off?

"Well it's about time you got here…..let's go!"

* * *

 ** **~Calo Nord~****

This whole damn bounty had become a nightmare. Damn Dark Jedi. They were more trouble than they were worth. This is why I always worked solo. Multiple people involved in my targets always muddled things up. However, it was clear that Admiral Karath didn't trust me. Hah….that was a laugh. I had more loyalty than apparently the Dark Jedi that were sent with me. One had turned on Karath and was swearing to deliver up Revan/Phoenix Star's body to Malak. The other had such devotion to the former Dark Lord that he was willing to stand by her despite the fact she had no idea who she was. I thought….well I had thought Phoenix and Revan were the same person that they were Force blind and that this bounty would not be too hard. I looked at Rama, damn her….what the frack did she do to my mind? Well aside from forcing me not to betray them all to Malak.

This was totally fracked up. I decided I would kill everyone except for Phoenix and claim my bounty. I rarely had bounties where the target I was after was to be delivered up alive. After this….I decided that I was never going to claim a bounty where my target was to be delivered up alive. This was too much of a mess. I would insist that all my bounties be where I killed them and no questions asked. Yea, this bounty paid more than all my contracts put together but seriously this was too much even for me.

I aimed my blasters at Rama and fired at her. She blocked most of my blaster fire with her lightsaber. Okay….so maybe blasters weren't the best way to confront her so I grabbed my heavily modified and upgraded vibrosword and rushed onto her.

She refused to go down easy. The Echani fought with me and so did Revan against Rama. Revan was in obvious pain and her swordmanship was obviously off. Her eyes were bloodshot from the sedative I gave to that deceptive little rodian. She was apparently still fighting to clear it from her body. There were many sedatives in the galaxy that could not be cleared using the Force and the one I used, was one of them. However, there was no way, Rama was going to survive this onslaught though with us attacking her plus the random blasts from that deranged droid and the little astromech. Rama growled and she pushed us all down to the ground with the Force.

Her pale face became even more chalky-ash looking and her eyes burned even more brightly yellow than they were normally. Damn it! Why was it that all Sith and Dark Jedi became so creepy looking? The Echani's features however painted a different picture, he was pale looking but Echani were normally slightly pale looking so it was hard to tell how much supposedly Dark Force use had corrupted him.

The Force lighting arched from her hands. "I will not die….not without taking you all with me…." She had gone fracking nuts.

The pain seared through all of us. However, I looked up at Revan, despite the pain clearly etched on her features, she absorbed the lighting and refracted it back right at that damn Dark Jedi.

Rama screamed in pain and she toppled to the ground dead.

Revan groaned in pain or was it exhaustion? Apparently what she did took a lot out of her. It was possible she had no clue what she was doing and had only acted out of instinct. She toppled to the ground dazed and passed out. I let out a sigh of relief. As much as I wanted to go after Phoenix Star/Revan that little display with Rama convinced me that I really didn't want to face Revan fully awake and aware.

I turned towards Omni. "Your turn….Echani."

He grabbed up the blade Revan had pilfered from him and reattached the blade. "We need not fight….Calo Nord. Our goals are compatible."

I snorted. "Yea….I think I'll take my chances on my own. No offense but your former partner went fracking nuts. I work solo….I'll tell Karath that the Jedi killed you."

He glared angrily at me. "How dare you….insolent fool! You think that double crossing me will be in your best interest? You are wrong. I serve her and the Force is with her. So you will die."

I laughed. "You know these Dark Jedi tirades are getting old. You make it sound like you all are invincible but really you're not."

Omni stated firmly. "You owe your life to her and to me….betraying me will not serve you or her."

* * *

 ** **~Bastila~****

Run….we had to get to Phoenix. Her life depended on it. Juhani and I used the Force to boost our endurance. The scene I felt was a confusing one. I only got part of it from Phoenix through our bond. She was like me, crippled. The sedative that Calo had given her, weakened her. She fought with a Dark Jedi and Calo against another Dark Jedi. I cringed as I felt Force lighting enter her body and then I gasped as Phoenix refracted the lighting back into the Dark Jedi. Impossible! Phoenix should not have known how to do that….but…. Revan would have known how to do so. She had been the Sith Master after all. Phoenix then toppled over and passed out leaving her vulnerable.

I gasped and nearly fell over with what I felt from Phoenix. Juhani and I stopped running and Juhani bore me up. "Bastila….are you alright?"

"Distracted….my bond..."

"Goes deeper….I smell Phoenix's scent on you the same as I smell it on Carth."

We stopped, waiting for the others to catch up.

I turned beet red. "What of it Juhani?"

"You play a dangerous game, Bastila. But I will keep your secret...I will not say anything to Carth….but be careful. To play with people's hearts is dangerous and can lead just as much to the Dark Side as surely as combat can."

"What do you know of such things?"

"There were two...I loved…had feelings for." Juhani sighed, "My actions caused him to leave the Order. It was this that Master Quatra confronted me on. It was what made me lash out at her in anger. Do not let your feelings or actions you have for Phoenix lead you or her away from the Order."

I glared at Juhani. "I don't intend to let anything lead me away from the Order, Juhani. I have a responsibility to the Order and to Phoenix. Malak must be stopped. I will not let what I feel for Phoenix distract me."

Juhani cowered a bit. "Forgive me if I spoke out of turn, Bastila. I trust your wisdom as the masters left you in charge of this mission."

The others finally caught up to us. Carth was breathing heavily. "Where is Phoenix, Bastila?"

I pointed over to a ridge, a smoking ruin of a sand crawler close by.

He took off….his blasters drawn. I could sense he would collapse soon, not only from the heat but from his emotional attachment. I felt it...it paralleled my own. I sighed, Juhani was right. I was becoming distracted by Phoenix. The bond….it drew us close and made me feel overwhelmed, overwhelmed with everything Revan was. So much potential, her destiny. I had to keep Phoenix on the path of the Light Side and I would do anything to keep her on the path of the Light.

And then I heard it….the cry…I looked out towards the dunes…..Sand People!

We had disturbed their land, their environment….I could feel their palpable anger from the Force itself and they were headed towards the combat we were headed towards.

* * *

 ** **~HK-47~****

Everything had erupted into chaotic violence. How wonderful! My master preformed beautifully even if she was a Jedi. My vocabulator cried out in agony as the Dark Jedi peppered us with Force lighting. Yet….my master was truly marvelous as she took in that painful lighting and pushed it back at the target that attacked us. The little garbage can was right, she was more than just a Jedi. I heard a squawk and moan, the garbage can blew out from the Force lighting. He lay a smoldering heap on the dunes. He would need repairs, assuming he could be repaired. If not….I'd gladly incorporate his parts into my own.

Statement: Well done master!

She groaned and her eyes rolled back into her head and she passed out.

I kept a defensive perimeter around my master. Do not let the Echani touch her. If he does, blast him. Yes, that was my master's last command.

The betrayals mounted as the bounty hunter proclaimed he would kill the Echani and take my master. Secondary target: the bounty hunter, Calo Nord, blast him away if he touches the master.

I was analyzing my targets, they both wanted my master contrary to her wishes. Therefore my processors dictated I target them both. I aimed my weapons at them and proceeded to target both of them.

I watched as vibrosword and lightsaber clashed against each other. I fired carefully directed blasts at both the bounty hunter and the Echani.

Then my audio receptors were filled with more auditory pleasure. Sand People war cries. Wonderful, more gore, more slaughter! This day was getting so much better. The tin can had promised me slaughter and he had been true to every beep he had beeped.

The bounty hunter and Echani paused in combat and the Sand People rushed over the ridge and attacked.

And then I saw others, two women, one a Cathar, another human, both with lightsabers blazing. Jedi….probably allies of my master. I pegged them as friendlies for the moment. Then two men came running among the scene their blasters firing at the Sand People. One of them, wore a really tacky jacket. "Protect Phoenix….."

My blaster rifle fired indiscriminately on Sand People and the Echani and the bounty hunter.

The tacky jacket man joined me and I heard a low groan from my master. "Carth…."

"Shh….take it easy. You look like hell."

A light strained chuckle issued from her. "And hello to you too…." She sighed. "I am sorry….I acted like a really big pain in the ass."

He laughed. "Well I guess we're even on the whole pain in the ass routine. Don't worry gorgeous….the cavalry is here."

He took a firm position next to me and said. "You're new..."

Statement: I am HK-47. Here to defend the master, touch the master in a violent manner and I will kill you.

He frowned. "Now hold on there….I am not here in any way to harm her I am here to protect her."

Statement: I do not know your intentions meatbag. You may act like you are going to protect her but the last one who took a place by my side threatened her as well and yet he vowed to protect her from the dead Dark Jedi.

"What?"

Statement: The Echani Dark Jedi swore to take her to Admiral Karath.

He looked at the Echani Dark Jedi fighting off Sand People and then back at me. "Damn it! Is there nothing that man won't do? First he attacks my home, and my wife and son are killed by his actions. And now he wants Phoenix. I swear….I'll kill that man."

My master groaned and she said softly yet in a firm tone. "HK…please don't….harm him. He's….he's….a friend."

Statement: Affirmative Master. I will mark him as a friendly. Course if he lashes out at you. I will have no choice to activate my combat protocols. However, I will be only too happy to help you meatbag friend of my master as long as you do not harm the master."

He shook his head at me and then aimed his blasters at the Sand People and fired away.

* * *

 ** **~Canderous~****

Now this was combat. Sand People coming at me with gaffi sticks and crying out war cries while I blew them away with my blaster rifle or cut them down with my vibroblade. It certainly made sitting on that blasted Hawk dull.

I looked at Onasi. "Hey….what's with the new droid?"

"It says it's here to protect Phoenix but it seems to have a bit of a personality quirk to it. It wanted to kill me at first."

I laughed. "Well right now we can use a combat based droid. So I wouldn't worry too much about it, Onasi."

The furry flea bag with it's twi'lek charge were occupied doing the same thing. However, I growled, the damn Echani Dark Jedi was attempting to get away. I proceeded to go after the Echani but Bastila stopped me and blocked my path.

"Let him go….we have other problems we have to focus on."

I frowned, "But Princess...that's one of Malak's Dark Jedi, won't he be a problem later on?"

Bastila sliced one of the Sand People in half. "Probably but there's nothing we can do about it. We are overwhelmed by Tusken Raiders and then there's Calo Nord."

I nodded, "Of course….Calo…."

I glared at the man, Calo and I had unfinished business. He was trying to play it low key trying to sneak past that new combat based droid and Onasi.

I cut Calo off. "Hello Calo….going somewhere?"

There was a hiss and I found the cathar Jedi beside me, she dropped right in front of me with a tremendous Force propelled leap. Her eyes filled with some sort of restrained rage at the hunter.

"Hey Wildcat….this man….he's mine."

She hissed. "He is mine too….Mandalorian. You have no idea what this man did to me back on Taris."

I raised an eyebrow. "You know him?"

"He worked with the Exchange….one of the Exchange's specially hired thugs back when I was younger. He collected on debts….one of them being me."

"I see….well then I guess we both have a pound of flesh we need out of him."

Calo laughed. "Gee you've gotten soft Canderous. Fighting alongside Jedi. Your Mandalorian blood has been diluted with too much Tarisian ale."

"And for that insult you will die!"

Juhani's face was scrunched up in fury. Maybe this Jedi had more potential than I realized. She wasn't afraid to act. She had a bit more of Revan's spirit in her than she realized.

Her lightsaber marked blow after blow against Calo. "You….you….disgusting hutt slime….."

I frowned, what the frack did Calo Nord do to her?

He laughed. "You always had such fire and passion….I told Xor about you…..that you were a pleasure, your fur….so soft…."

Juhani hissed and I finally figured it out, that fracking idiot bounty hunter had forced himself upon the cathar Jedi; that was an indignity that deserved to be avenged.

I snorted. "Seriously Calo….twenty billion sentients in the galaxy that probably would submit to you and you tried to bed a cathar….not a smart move."

I looked at Juhani. "Wildcat….you've got an ally in your cause on this."

We both struck against the damn bounty hunter. Lightsaber and vibroblade cutting and thrashing quite violently at the bounty hunter. In the end, the combat droid pilfered the shock arm from the downed astromech and shocked the bounty hunter to death.

Looking around the corpses of dead Sand People and the dead Calo I sighed. "Well now that that's done we really ought to get back to the Hawk. Phoenix needs medical treatment and we need to regroup."

I looked to find Juhani was in a very somber and slightly morose mood. "I….I shouldn't have done that….that was wrong."

I rolled my eyes. "Fracking hell….Wildcat….you really need to accept your actions for what they are. What you did…..that was justice. "

"Justice perhaps….but the manner it was exacted….I felt the Dark Side in my actions."

"Damn fracking Jedi….look Juhani, you're from a warrior's race. You're going to have to make peace with your damn Jedi half and your damn cathar half. Otherwise you're going to fracking limit yourself. I say what you did was justice, and justice long over due. The Jedi Rev….."

Bastila cringed.

I paused, I promised Phoenix I would not mentioned Revan to Bastila and I sighed. "Anyway….there was a certain Jedi in the Manadlorian wars that was not afraid to act and accepted his actions as such without fear and without reservation. You're a Jedi…Wildcat and you're suppose to act in the cause of justice….at least that's what your masters teach you. So what happens when you don't act in the cause of justice on your own behalf?"

Juhani did not answer. I sighed. "You limit yourself and make yourself weak. Anyway...figure your own issues out otherwise someone will kill you one of these days."

Juhani said nothing and I scooped Phoenix into my arms. Carth gave me an angry glare. Phoenix looked at me. "Canderous…."

"Hey kid….you gave us quite a worry. But never mind that now, you look like fracking kath crap. Blue...let's get that T3 unit up and running and let's get out of here before the damn Sand People come back."

* * *

A/N: Man the end of this chapter was rough. I had to rewrite it three times till I settled on doing it from Canderous' pov. He is the veteran warrior after all but I seriously tried to write the end of this from three different pov. From Mission's perspective, and even from Juhani's perspective. Yet finally in the end decided to write it from Canderous' view and it flowed so much better because writing from the warrior's perspective flowed really a lot better than it would of from the others. Anyway...thanks for the reviews...I always try to respond to any reviews and/or suggested corrections. I wouldn't be that great a writer if I didn't.


	49. Chapter 48:Tatooine: Reprieve

**Chapter 48: Tatooine: Reprieve**

 **~Phoenix~**

 _Jedi….heed my words. The flushing of poisons and sedatives from ones body particularly such that are designed to target Jedi has been done by Sith, bounty hunters and others. I carry this treatment in my holocron to help guide you through purging such things…._

"Nix…."

I looked up from my study over Master Jax's holocron as I studied in the cargo hold.

"Yes, Mish…."

"About our secret…."

"Yea….my possession by a Sith Lord."

"Bastila knows..."

"What?!"

"Look, I am sorry, Nix….but she pulled it out of me with the Force."

"And what gave her the idea to pull it out of you in the first place?"

"Please Nix, don't be angry. I was worried about you, walking out like you did….and you saying you're possessed by a Sith Lord."

I put my head in my hands and took a deep seated breath, but the anger was rising. "Maybe if you had kept your feelings a bit closer to your chest, Bastila wouldn't have had the excuse to probe your mind in the first place."

Mission backed away. "I am sorry….really I am….please….don't be angry."

"I am angry at…." I paused. My anger was misdirected, misplaced. Mission was Force blind. She had been worried about me I could sense it. My head was still just slightly muddled with the cocktail of juma juice and sedative that Grava had given me. I was mostly better but had been looking for ways to clear it even more with Master Jax's holocron.

"No, my frustration is more with Bastila than it is with you. While you should have been careful saying anything around her. You didn't know she would pluck that out of you. Look Mission, Bastila…." I paused and debated how much to tell her seeing how Bastila had violated both of our trusts. I sighed. "Bastila has been keeping things from me, Mission. I am not sure what….but I don't trust her and what you say confirms a really good reason why I shouldn't trust her."

I sighed, we had made love to each other and I felt like I had been stabbed in the chest. I felt sick. I had betrayed Carth and for what? To make love with a woman hiding things from me and ripping secrets from Mission's head. I felt like I had lost all of my credits playing Nar Shaddaa style pazaak. Yea, the clothes were flying everywhere on that one and I had lost everything, including my dignity.

Mission frowned. "Are you okay, Nix?"

"I….I don't know….look I am sure you're upset at Bastila...but stay away from her. I'll handle it."

"Okay, Nix. Yea...I kinda wanted to let you know before I told her off."

I smiled softly and gave Mission a hug. "And I promise, no more going off on…." I paused. "Well I don't know...me being a Jedi….I may not be able to keep that promise completely but no more….well no more getting out of my head drunk. I've learned my lesson."

Mission chuckled lightly. "Seriously Nix, you trying to give up drinking is like seeing a gamorrean with wings. I don't think you can. You're too much...well….it's a part of you and your personality."

I sighed, Mission was right in fact that Grava knew me so well that drinking was a part of my existence, even before the Jedi. I had grown up with my family growing grapes, making wine. Alcohol was part of my upbringing, then when they were killed. I drunk to make the pain go away. Even my getting trapped with Calo dealt with my pain of betraying Carth. I nodded at Mission. "You're right….I am not exactly proud of that either."

"Don't beat yourself up, Nix. You maybe a Jedi, but you're not perfect. Bastila picking my brain like picking a lock proves that Jedi are not perfect."

"That's an interesting way of seeing things. Anyway….let me get back to my studies and let me see if I can make up for stepping out on you and Zaalbar. If I remember correctly there's a swoop bike track around here. Some hutt runs it, but I am sure you and me could run a few personal runs together just to blow off some steam."

Mission chuckled. "You're on Nix. I'll beat you!"

I laughed. "Now hold on a minute, I beat the season opener on Taris and you're bragging you can beat me."

"Yea, but you don't have the swoop bike accelerator prototype with you and I figure I can beat you easily."

 **~0o0~**

 _The first step of clearing these poisons and sedatives from your body is…._

"Phoenix, we need to talk…."

I looked up to see Carth. I sighed, I wasn't looking forward to this. I felt like a child getting ready to be spanked. I smirked, thinking about Carth swatting me on my behind earlier. Force, I really did love that man. What the frack was I thinking, a fling with Bastila in the fresher? Yet, I still had feelings for Carth. Damn it Phoenix…..you are one messed up sentient.

He shook his head. "You're smirking! Seriously, Phoenix this is no time to grin or even laugh. This is serious. I can't imagine the pressure and the burden you're under. You're having dreams of Revan and Malak, plus the fact that you're going to be going after Malak. However, that's no excuse running off and getting drunk. Plus…..well...what happened that night….are you?" He paused a moment struggling to get the words out. "You can't be…..can you?"

"Out with it….Carth!"

"Pregnant?"

I frowned. "Pregnant….where in the Force did you get that idea?"

"Well you were so emotional and moody that evening….I thought."

I suddenly laughed. "Force….no….I….would know, believe me. I would have felt that life within me. Look Carth, don't get me wrong. I'd love to have a little Phoenix or even a little Carth running around and the idea of being a parent with you." I smiled softly and I gently came over and squeezed his hand. "Let's just call it a future aspiration, okay."

Force….what the hell are you doing? You think everything is going to be normal after what you did with Bastila? You were moody and emotional because you consummated your love with Bastila and you betrayed what you have with Carth. And you still have feelings for Bastila even though she's hiding things from you and messed with Mission's mind. In what galaxy is this acceptable? You really are fracked up in the head, Phoenix.

I gasped as suddenly Carth kissed me quite passionately, I submitted as I wrapped my arms around him and accepted the kiss as his lover. I really am a Star Tramp…..geeze talk about that joke rearing it's ugly head.

"How about we….see about finding a place a bit more private….Phoenix?"

"Seriously Carth, you were worried about me having a child and you still want to make love even after you were worried about that possibility!?"

After what happened with me and Bastila, I seriously had learned my lesson, as much as I wanted to make love with Carth, maybe the whole not being in love or falling in love philosophy with the Jedi was a valid point. I needed to be a bit more tempered, or at least try to be a bit more tempered. However, I knew I might not be able to fully commit to the decision I was making. I seemed to be driven by feelings and passions. I had willfully gone against the Jedi Code both with Carth and Bastila. I still believe that the code was flawed but... still as I was coming to realize the code had definite practical applications. I would have saved myself a lot more misery and grief if I had just followed the fracking code.

His shoulders slumped and I sighed. "How about slowing down our relationship, Carth? Not everything has to be taken so quickly. If you honestly want children with me….then there is no rush."

"But what if I lose you, Phoenix? I almost lost you to Calo Nord and what ever the hell Admiral Karath wants with you."

"Then we have the memories we already made, Carth. And I am not opposed to our love making, just not right now."

He sighed and ran his fingers through my hair. "You are a strange woman, Phoenix. One moment you throw caution and everything to the wind and the next you urge patience and caution. It's like…"

"Like what?"

"Like I am dealing with two different women."

"Don't be silly, I just think we need to think things through a bit more carefully. Anyway….I really need to get back to my studies."

 **~o0o~**

 _To purge poisons and sedatives from your body one must focus very intently on the physical aspects of ones body. Focus on your heart, the pumping of blood, focus on the flow of blood that flows through your body. As you find yourself in such a meditative state you will then…._

"Phoenix can we talk?"

I looked up from the holocron to find Bastila near me. "Fraking hell….can't I just study for a change?"

Bastila sighed. "I am sorry, I do apologize. What are you studying?"

"Master Jax's holocron. I am trying to learn how to purge very resistant poisons and sedatives from my body. After what happened….I realized I've been neglecting my studies."

Bastila nodded. "I feel slightly responsible, Phoenix."

I looked at her. "Bastila, you're not good for me. I become moody, irrational, temperamental, and I don't like what I am becoming around you."

"That is odd because I was going to say the same thing. I still have feelings for you though."

"Yea me too. So what are we going to do about it?"

Bastila pursed up her face in thought. "I do not know….short of….breaking the bond. Regardless, we have acted very foolishly."

"Speaking of actions, do you mind telling me what the frack you were doing going through Mission's mind? She came to me telling me she betrayed one of my secrets to you because you compelled her for my secrets that I chose not to reveal to you."

Bastila's face looked firm as she spoke to me. "Phoenix, how dare you keep secrets from me! We are suppose to be friends. By the Force, we are more than friends considering everything. We are bonded and I don't know how you managed to hide anything from me in the first place. Plus trusting a twi'lek over me."

I glared at Bastila. "You're a fine one to talk. You're hiding things from me as well. Look you want to know why I am hiding things from you. Well I…." I paused. "Hell with it…..I think I am going insane. I am scared Bastila. There's a fracking Sith Lord in my mind and...I was worried at first it was mental instability. I still think I am mentally unstable. What the frack is wrong with me….Bastila? Did you know? Is this the big secret you've been hiding from me? The fact that you always knew there was a Sith spirit rumbling around in my head."

Bastila looked thoughtful…..

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"… _What the frack is wrong with me….Bastila? Did you know? Is this the big secret you've been hiding from me? The fact that you always knew there was a Sith spirit rumbling around in my head."_

Phoenix looked like she was about to break down into tears. I couldn't help myself and I found myself enfolding my arms around her as she began to sob. I stroked her dark black hair. She felt as though she was on the verge of mental exhaustion.

"I knew... Phoenix and yes….that is the secret I have been hiding from you. I had hoped that…. well the council and I did everything to block it's influence from you but apparently the spirit was stronger than we thought and it's bleeding through."

I sighed, again this wasn't exactly the truth and yet it was from a certain point of view. It seemed to be enough because Phoenix accepted it and I felt a huge sigh of relief from Phoenix.

"Have you tried to fracking get rid of it? I don't want it….I don't fracking want it!"

"We tried that….Phoenix. It didn't work. Like I said we were able to block it's influence from your mind at least we thought we had."

She sighed. "It's Revan….isn't it? The Sith spirit...it's Revan….because that would explain the dreams..."

I raised an eyebrow and wondered how far I should take this but in the end, I decided that Phoenix needed something. She was falling apart. "Yes….but this spirit….we needed it from you….needed it so we can figure out where Malak's fleet is coming from but we had only hoped to contain its presence and rely on the surface impressions coming from the bond we both share."

Phoenix sighed. "It's starting to make sense….I was nearly killed on Tatooine and Revan's spirit wandered disembodied and it….attached itself to me. I think…that makes sense…although….I am not sure when I was attacked on Tatooine and if it corresponds with Revan's death."

Is that what Revan errr….Phoenix thought? Revan's broken mind was trying so hard to figure things out. She was still confused and still holding out hope that she was Phoenix Star. Perhaps this was the case because the alternative would have scared her or frightened her to the center of her very being. She had gone this long without telling me because she was scared and afraid.

"I don't know when you were attacked here. To be honest….I didn't even know you were attacked, it's not on your service records."

That was true, Master Dorak had not even told me that the real Phoenix was alive somewhere. I still wondered why? Perhaps it was to give the real Phoenix the privacy she needed or perhaps because the real Phoenix's mind had been damaged as well and didn't remember enough to tell the Jedi what had happened. Yet….the real Phoenix had her cousin save her and he had married her. Yet, this seemed to be where Phoenix/Revan's memory diverged. The real Phoenix was probably living an uneventful life back on Naboo whereas Phoenix/Revan was here hunting down Star Maps and living a life that the real Phoenix would be unable to comprehend.

"Well that makes sense...because I don't remember it either. I learned from Grava that I was attacked by Calo in the past."

Poor Revan….but it was better this way. At least Phoenix still thought she was Phoenix and not Revan.

Phoenix then added,"I was assigned to you because….you sensed Revan's spirit within me. You recognized his spirit because you were there when he died. Course how you found him within me….well I guess the Force has a way of doing these things. Well that's a huge relief off my back….Bastila. Now I know I am not going insane….but I am not sure if this is really all that better because…I am fracking possessed by Revan. The Force really knows how to screw with people. And now….I wonder if I didn't fall for you because….well I've got a male Sith Lord's spirit within me."

"That's a far stretch, Phoenix."

"What that I think I am a guy?! Stranger things happen...Bastila like having a fracking Sith spirit attach itself to me."

I felt somewhat relieved as well, this meant I didn't have to hide so much now from Phoenix. She looked at me. "Bastila...thank you for being honest with me for once."

I wanted to cringe. This wasn't being honest at all. Yet…what could I do? I was forbidden to tell Phoenix the full truth that she was Revan. Yet it was obvious she was going to fall apart if she didn't have a certain measure or certain point of view of the truth given to her.

She suddenly grasped me and gave me a full fledged kiss on my lips, a feeling of happiness emanating from her. "Bastila….we should….well we should get back on track of finding the Star Maps."

"Phoenix please….you must stop….this! We are Jedi. We are suppose to be beyond such things. I cannot...we must not submit to our crude physical desires once more."

Phoenix blushed. "Sorry….I just feel really relieved that there is finally a measure of truth between us."

But it wasn't truth….or was it? I wasn't exactly sure. It felt just as wrong as when I had found out that Revan wasn't a man and the masters and the council had never told me. Yet I suppose all that mattered was that Phoenix had some measure of peace within her. She felt better to me. More calm than she had in ages. How long that would last I was not sure?

"I think….well I think because of what I've told you, we should keep this between ourselves, Phoenix. Can you imagine how Carth or Canderous would react if they knew this?"

Phoenix looked contemplative for a moment and she nodded. "I agree. So….we keep what we know between ourselves. Anyway about the map?"

I nodded. "Yes….we should get started. However….it's finding the Star Map that seems to be the good question."

Query: Master, will you take me with you?

I turned to find that annoying combat droid. Had it been spying on us?

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Finally some answers. I felt relieved so very relieved. It did not solve my problems, oh no….I was still possessed by the spirit of Revan but….to have answers from Bastila helped me so very much. Yet I had finally been able to understand who Darth Kath Crap was. I had almost figured out who Kath Crap was but something prevented me. Had that been Bastila or something else? Bastila had mentioned that the masters had tried to block the Sith spirit. Perhaps that had been the masters attempt to block the spirit from breaking through my mind.

 _Query: Master, will you take me with you?_

I turned to find HK-47. How did T3 manage to get this droid in the first place? I had many questions for the droid and for T3.

"HK thank you for being there for me. T3 chose wisely in bringing your assistance to me."

Statement: The trash compactor is not without merit, master. However, you may wish to know how he brought my assistance to you.

"Hmm….you seem a pretty valuable droid. I would imagine you are worth a good deal of credits. More than what I would have on hand. I will have to ask T3 how he managed to acquire you."

Pleased Statement: Why thank you master! I consider you valuable as well….for a meatbag.

Bastila looked at the droid. She seemed to be eyeing the droid with a bit of disdain and seemed annoyed by it's presence. I felt amused that somehow Bastila didn't like the droid. "Bastila…maybe you should prepare supplies for the trek out into the Tatooine desert. We're going to need water, rations, maybe even some shovels."

Bastila nodded and left.

I turned towards HK-47. "I am afraid I don't know a lot about you."

Statement: Nor do I know a lot about you either, master except that for a meatbag you are a Jedi.

"Ummm what's with calling me a meatbag?"

Retraction: Did I say that out loud? I apologize, master. While you are a meatbag I suppose I should not call you such.

"Ummm you just called me a meatbag again...really HK!"

Explanation: It's just that… you have all these squishy parts, master. And all that water! How the constant sloshing doesn't drive you mad, I have no idea…

"I think….well….I think I already might be mad anyway…and you're not helping my psyche at all."

Objection: Surely not, master. I am programmed to perform all kinds of psychological assistance. Do you require some?

"Yea….I bet it requires putting your master out of their misery."

Objection: Surely not, master. I am programmed not to kill or harm my master. A droid has some dignity, master."

I sighed. "I am not sure how….but I survive."

Commentary: As do I. It is our lot in life, I suppose, master. Shall we find something to kill to cheer ourselves up?

"Kill?"

Statement: Why of course, master. There is nothing in the galaxy that gives me far more pleasure than killing organic based meatbags.

"What kind of droid are you, anyway?"

Observation: I am sure that you are aware of the majority of my skills, master. I can handle various sorts of heavy weaponry with ease. My physical abilities are well-above those of your average meatbag, I can translate bothersome languages, such as the language of those annoying meatbag Sand People. Then there are are my sensor functions… I am an assassin if you would."

I felt a bit mortified, what would a Jedi do with a droid like this? "An assassin!"

Caution: Shhhh, master! Such a function in a droid is highly illegal.

I nodded. "Well you can't help being what you are HK….so I'll keep your secret. Besides, it might come in handy later on."

Although I wasn't sure what use I might have for HK as an assassin. He had been handy earlier on.

Commentary: That would be wise master. I do have to let you know that my assassination protocols have been currently damaged so you cannot use me to my full ability. Perhaps you may be able to repair me and restore that function later on. I also must let you know that a lot of my memory has been damaged before I came into your service. Perhaps you may be able to repair that as well.

"I see….it seems like you've been used and abused quite a lot, HK. Judging by your carbon scoring and the way your durasteel seems a bit dented in spots.

Statement: That is an understatement, master. Unfortunately I have no memory of it. As I said earlier perhaps you will be able to help rectify such things.

"Perhaps."

Query: Master, when will you be building another lightsaber? I noticed that when I ran into you, you didn't have one except for the one you managed to take from the Echani and he took it back when you malfunctioned.

"I suppose I will have to make a new one. I think I can find the parts in the cargo hold. Oh one more thing….what do you think of Bastila?"

I only asked because I wondered what the droid had seen and Bastila seemed to dislike the droid. She had reasons for not liking the droid, she seemed to sense somehow it's violent assassin qualities, and that was before she even knew what it was. I grinned a bit, something about that pleased me that Bastila didn't like the droid. The droid's protocols weren't even working.

Answer: She is okay for a meatbag, master but….

HK paused and then stated in Bastila's voice, Mockery: "Oh Master, I love you but I hate all what you stand for, but I think we should go press our slimy mucus-covered lips together in the cargo hold."

I turned my head downward slightly embarrassed. "Uhh…..yea….I see you've been uhhh watching us then."

Statement: Oh Master, I won't say anything. Besides the actions of organic meatbags are an eternal mystery to me. If you are concerned about what I saw, all my visual receptors saw when I got to the cargo hold was you two pressing your slimy mucus-covered lips together and then her protesting about your actions afterwards.

"Thanks HK….I think that's what bothered Bastila. We really don't want our actions noticed and she's kind of well….never mind."

I sighed as I went digging through various odds and ends in the cargo hold and found the various parts that I recognized I needed. HK watched as I quietly took a couple of crystals and various parts and carefully put them together. I then proceeded to work on making a new lightsaber, this one would be a stronger and more demonstrative blade. Yea, I kind of had a bit of foolish pride but I wanted a double-blade like Bastila's and a bit like the Echani's blade I had seen. The idea of separating the blades so they could be two single blades or connect together into a double-bladed lightsaber seemed practical to me. I felt that this lightsaber would serve me much better than the two blades I had been wielding. I closed my eyes and let the Force fill me as I quietly trickled the Force through the parts and filtered it through the crystals and the parts. The blade suddenly sprang to life, a deep vibrant purple.

Statement: Well done, master!

I quietly detached them and tested them then put them back together as a double blade. I smiled. "Thanks HK."

 **~o0o~**

"Hey, Mish how's T3 doing?"

Mission sighed. "He's doing okay. A few repairs to his chassis and he seems good as new."

I patted the droid on the top of his dome.

"T3, I want to thank you for getting me the help I needed."

::Don't worry Phoenix. I only followed your command as you stated.::

"Yea….about that. How exactly did you get HK-47?"

::I searched records for your family and cousins, Phoenix. I borrowed the credits from them.::

I rolled my eyes. "Wonderful….that's all I need is my relations back on Naboo to claim I stole from them."

::They are what remains of your family, Phoenix. You really should keep in touch with them more.::

"Uhh….no thanks."

Mission frowned, somehow she had deduced the comment was regarding my many relations back on Naboo. "But they are your family, Nix. Don't you care about them?"

I sighed. "Yea...I asked for their help after what happened to my family on Deralia. They chose to ignore the Mandalorians. They said I needed to grieve and let their deaths go. I couldn't….I couldn't do that Mission. All I needed was support from my uncles, my aunts, my cousins. They wouldn't give it to me, they were afraid. Afraid of the damn Mandalorians. Afraid that the Mandalorians would go after them on Naboo if I decided to smuggle weapons out on the Rim. So I was left on my own. I did all right. I didn't need them and now to find out….that T3 "stole" credits from them….that's reprehensible."

::I am sorry, Phoenix. I did what I had to do to help you.::

Mission shook her head. "Look Nix, I am sorry you had bad dealings with your family. But look if I had a chance to meet up with Griff again, I'd take it."

"Perhaps as a Jedi I do need to make peace with them. Maybe as soon as this mission is over Mish, I'll do it."

Mission smiled. "Hey family is everything, Nix. Even I know that."

* * *

A/N: I noticed a plot hole with Calo Nord and Juhani and I fixed it because according to my last chapters. Calo was new to the Exchange. I've fixed it that he was new to serving Davrik and that he served another Exchange boss. Yea, I tied in that rather interesting exchange with HK found in KOTOR II. LOL….

I do have to laugh at the whole "Slimy mucus-covered lips thing." Anyway I promise Mission will meet up with Griff and because of the emotional attachment with Bastila there will be a meeting with Helena Shan coming,


	50. Ch 49:Tatooine: Matters of Family

****Chapter 49: Tatooine: Matters of Family****

 **~Helena Shan~**

I sat sobbing at the bar. It had been a day since Bastian Shan had left to seek after krayt dragon pearls. He had acquired the services of a twi'lek who bragged that he knew all the best spots where the dragon pearls could be found. He even sold him a questionable map that supposedly had all the krayt breeding grounds. Sadly, I had not heard from Bastian or the twi'lek since. I sat sitting at the cantina drinking the local brew and chewing on what little spice Bastian had bought for me.

The spice made the pain bearable, my body often ended up in painful spasms and rhythmic jerks. The spasms and jerks were hard on my heart. There was sadly no cure for the sickness and eventually my heart would give out. Poor Bastian, he had spent so many credits buying spice to help me endure my pain. I tried to tell him to give it up that I was dying. He refused to listen to me. He was stubborn and refused to give up on me. We had gone from doctor to doctor to doctor but none of them knew what was wrong with me or had any treatments for the sickness that was killing me. The best doctors of course could be found on Coruscant, but we simply did not have the credits to hire a Coruscanti doctor to help my sickness. We had spent our last credits coming to this desert world. We never had that many credits.

Always one treasure or hunting seeking adventure after another with Tian. He craved and desired it. His love for searching for hidden treasures and hidden items had been what drew me to him when we first met. I had been fascinated as a young girl on Talravin when he had come searching for Talravin diamonds in the various caves on the planet. He loved crawling through tight spaces and tight corners of the caves. It was with Tian that as a young girl I rebelled over my repressive upbringing.

My father had been a hard dominating man. He believed in a hard rigid life, rejecting the technology that made our lives easier. He scorned such things and said that humans had become slaves to droids, freshers, data pads. He had established a rigorous commune almost religious-like following on the core worlds rejecting technology and gathering a colony of like-minded individuals on Talravin. It was there that I had been born and my mother died giving birth to me, as my father rejected even the most advanced medical treatments in the galaxy. Meeting Tian had been a breath of fresh air in my life. He had none of the repressiveness of my father or his followers.

At the time, I enjoyed Tian's exuberant nature, the thrill of finding hidden and buried items. The exchanging such items for credits. Tian had opened me up to a new world of technology and new ideas. Tian loved how I reacted to things that many humans would have taken for granted. Things like a data pad seemed amazing to me, and then there was the holocron he possessed. He mentioned he had gotten it during his days as a Jedi initiate. Bastian had been with the Jedi for awhile as a child and teenager but as I had learned from him, he had no real skill in the Force. Sure he said he had glimmers of its use in his life as he had a natural knack at finding valuable and important things but other than that, he might as well have been Force blind. He couldn't manipulate the Force the way others of the Jedi Order could so his days at even being considered a Jedi were shut closed on him. He did not seem bitter about it, he simply stated you either have the ability to use it to its full potential or you didn't. But Tian was like that, he never could stay angry for long, he was too good-natured and too gregarious. I on the other hand maintained my father's rather gruff and rather forceful manner. Tian seemed to be able to open me up, he could always make me smile and laugh.

However, when my father found out about our relationship he put his foot down and told me it was forbidden for an outsider of our community to be involved with me. I finally rebelled and we ended up eloping together. Marriage with Bastian Shan had been heaven. We loved each other and our honeymoon had been spent looking for rare Adegan crystals. We then went to Hoth to hunt wampa pelts. It was there that I found out I was pregnant with Bastila. Tian was thrilled to find out I was pregnant, and even more thrilled when the doctor on Hoth stated that we were going to have a girl. I wanted to go home but Tian did not. He still wanted to explore the galaxy but when he saw that I was having a rough time being pregnant he slowly relented and we went back to Talravin.

My father was angry at first when I came home with Tian. Yet, Bastian was willing to obey the rules of my father's commune as he knew that I needed a place to give birth to our daughter. So my father's anger relented and we were allowed to stay. I hate to admit it, but I never really wanted children and I told Tian that this child would be our only child. I just didn't know how to raise a child and Tian's wandering nature made having a child not ideal. Despite all the logic of not having children, Tian seemed brokenhearted and moped for days afterwards. He only cheered up a little after I agreed to name our daughter after him.

Bastila ended up being her father's child. He showered her with so much affection that it made me jealous. I was the one who had given birth to the child. Didn't I mean anything to him anymore? Yet I had sincerely hoped that Bastila would cause Tian to settle down. However, after a few months he began planning his next adventure across the galaxy. I argued with him and we fought that traveling was not for a baby. He swore and vowed that this would be our last trip.

Six years later, he still swore and vowed to me and Bastila that we would go back to Talravin. Yet, what was even worse was that Bastila grew to love the wandering life as well. She begged and pleaded to go with her father on his hunting and treasure trips. She would pout and whine when I put my foot down and said no. She grew angry at me and began to resent me for keeping her away from her father. Those two were so close that Tian was willing to put his own daughter's safety at risk just to be with her. I had a mother's concern in wanting to keep her safe, after all she was only six. Arriving to rest on Dantooine had been a blessing, the Jedi had taken notice of Bastila and said she was Force sensitive. Thank the Force, I told Tian that Bastila was Force sensitive and that the Jedi wanted to take her for training. Bastila needed a better life than just wandering the galaxy looking and hunting for the riches of the galaxy. Tian became saddened, he didn't want to give up Bastila. Yet, he knew the rules of the Republic….all Force sensitive children were to be given up to the Jedi Order. After all, he too had been given up as a child to the Order. So with tears in his eyes, he said good bye to Bastila and gave her one last hug. As for me, she refused to give me any sort of love or affection. As we turned to leave her, Bastila started crying and sobbing for her father. I felt guilty, but really Bastila was better off with the Jedi. They could give her the stability that neither I nor Bastian could give her.

Now, Tian was missing and perhaps dead. I should have never let him go after those damn krayt dragon pearls. I kept begging him to stay with the wraid. Not that wraid weren't dangerous, they were but far less dangerous than krayt dragons. When we had first arrived he had first hunted wraid to earn money to help us provide for an expedition so he could hunt krayt dragon and to pay for small amounts of spice to help me with the pain from my disease.

I heard some of the patrons speaking and jabbering about Jedi being on the planet. Thank the Force, maybe the Jedi could get a message to Bastila. She would be about nineteen or twenty at this time. Surely, the Jedi would understand that a dying mother had the right to contact their only child. A Jedi entered the cantina with a rusty tinted droid and an astromech. The bartender harped that the droids weren't allowed in the cantina and the Jedi told the droids to stay put outside and wait for her. I sighed, perhaps she might be able to get a message to my Bastila to let her know regarding my failing health. I turned to the woman as she wandered up to the bar. "Excuse me, you're with the Jedi Order, aren't you?"

The woman nodded. "Yes, is there something I can help you with?"

I sighed. "My daughter is a Jedi….is there anyway you can get a message to her? I know it's not permitted to contact family but this is an emergency and I need to get a message to her."

She nodded. "Yes, if you wish to record a message on a datapad I will transmit it to the Order and they will get it to your daughter."

"Thank you, Jedi. I haven't seen Bastila in ages….I am not even sure she will be willing to communicate with me anyway."

The dark haired woman's features paled. "Did you say Bastila? Bastila Shan?"

I nodded. "Yes…"

The woman said softly. "She is here with me, we are on a mission for the Order."

I gasped in amazement, perhaps the Force was kind to the wishes of a dying woman.

"Please Jedi…."

"Phoenix Star."

"Please Jedi Phoenix Star….can you tell her I am sick? I need her….I need to see her."

The woman sighed. "I'll see what I can do….umm…."

"Helena Shan."

She nodded and she spent a good amount of time looking me over and then turned to the bartender and started heatedly talking to him.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Bastila's mother. I stood for a moment staring at her. It never occurred to me that Bastila had family.

 _Of course, nerf for brains, all Jedi have family. Even you._

Darth Kath….Darth Revan…..leave me alone.

 _So now I am Darth Revan. How long did it take you to figure that out?_

Longer than I care to admit.

 _Are you really that stupid?_

I am stupid?! You never told me who you were to begin with.

 _Why should I? You really needed to figure this out on your own. So why are you here, Phoenix? Hmm….oh yes….to gut the pathetic rodian. How amusing. So your Jedi code of passivity fails you now. You want revenge!_

This isn't revenge, Revan. It's justice.

 _The line between justice and revenge is as thin as a slender blade. You will cross it if you persist._

You sound like a Jedi.

 _I was a Jedi….and I was a Sith. I know far more than you when it comes to revenge and justice, Phoenix. The lines blur very quickly._

You're not really sounding like the Dark Lord, Revan.

There was a quick sigh. _Can I not speak frankly? I am stuck with a half-wit of a Jedi who refuses to act until now. Why are you acting anyway? Do you know?_

I refused to answer, I was my own person. I didn't have to respond to some fracking Sith Lord all the time.

I glared at the bartender. "Where is Grava Twiva?"

The bartender shook his head. "I haven't seen him."

"You're lying….all the Czerka scum come into this dive and drink. Now where is he?"

"He's in the Czerka offices."

I snorted. "Liar...I've been there. He wasn't there."

"Then I honestly don't know where he is."

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you?"

 _Oooh nice touch, although I would have been harsher, Phoenix._

Shut up Revan!

The bartender paled. "Look….I am sorry….about what Grava did to you."

"Grava's plans would have fallen apart if you weren't complacent to his actions. How much did he pay you to drug me? Now tell me the truth…." I brought forward one of my lightsaber blades and ignited it, "or I begin to start taking digits and limbs. It would be extremely hard to pour drinks minus a few fingers or even a hand or two."

The bartender sighed. "He didn't pay me enough. He found out that you survived Calo's trap and you're alive. There's a rumor spreading through the Czerka ranks that there are old ruins on this planet and that Czerka found them when they were mining. They had to abandon that particular mining site though because it woke up a krayt dragon and that dragon was seriously peeved off. Anyway the dragon began to eat wookiees and miners like the monster it is. If I was going to hide from a pissed off Jedi, those ruins would be the best spot."

Hmmm that was interesting. The dream I had of the Star Map showed the map found within ruins. Perhaps I could find the Star Map and slit Grava's throat all in the same trip.

 _Oooh you want to slit his throat….can I watch?_

Shut up Revan!

 _I won't. And what happened to justice? Do you seriously think that killing Grava will satisfy you?_

That was a good question. I mulled it over. No, I don't think so.

 _An honest answer. Revenge is such a cold empty thing. You kill him you will not be satisfied. The only thing that will satisfy you is more blood._

What kind of Dark Lord are you, talking me out of revenge?

 _I am not. You want revenge, take it. But if you want it….it better be for the right reasons. Petty vendettas are just that…. petty. There are things that are so much worst than death, Phoenix. Death is a release but living can be just as painful._

What the hell do you suggest then?

 _A punishment that befits him. Think that over, Phoenix. Not all revenges culminate in death._

Revan had a point. Wait a minute, am I actually entertaining the thoughts of a Dark Lord? Yet, Grava needed to be taken down. He had betrayed me twice. What was important to the rodian? The answer came easily to me, his business dealings with Czerka. If Czerka turned against him or if he ended up losing business…..yes….an appropriate punishment for Grava was for him to lose his business and to be left financially ruined.

 _Now that's a revenge that's worthy of the Sith!_

Shut up!

 _Well it is, Phoenix or did you think that your mind did not contain such dark thoughts?_

I shivered as I left the cantina. I turned to HK-47. "Come on HK and T3 we have a rodian's life to ruin."

Query: Does this involve killing the rodian, Master?

"No, something much worse, I plan to ruin the rodian financially. He'll wish he never crossed paths with me."

Statement: Master, you are like a delightful random cruelty generator. Poisoning all those who wrong you. You are a testament to all organic meatbags everywhere.

T3 suddenly beeped.::Phoenix, you really need to buy supplies for our expedition. It is an inefficient amount of your time going after the rodian who hurt you.::

HK interrupted T3, Interjection: Shut up, you stupid bucket of bolts if the master wishes to harm the rodian, that is her choice, not yours.

I grunted suddenly not very happy with HK or even T3's assessments. No, Phoenix don't chicken out on this. Grava deserves to be ruined. He almost caused your own death or worse. It began to make sense why Malak and Admiral Karath wanted me. I contained the spirit of Darth Revan. Having the Dark Lord in my head, was not a good thing at all. I had intended to buy supplies for our foray to find the Star Map but I hadn't really been doing that. No, I had been out looking for the scum rodian that had sold me out to Calo Nord. The others were out buying supplies as well. I was caught off guard when Mission ran into me. "Nix….you've got to help me."

I stared at Mission, she looked panicked and alarmed. "I...I ran into Lena. I didn't think I'd ever see her again. But she said that my brother….one of his crazy harebrained schemes. He sold some maps of Tatooine and promised to guide some guy to find krayt dragon pearls….well they got attacked by the Sand People on the way. Please Nix, you have to help me…."

HK suddenly spoke, Statement: Master, let's go slaughter the meatbag Sand People.

I scowled. "Shut up HK….no sense in killing the Sand People…..yet."

Statement: Shutting up, master.

I sighed, my ideas for ruining Grava fled from my mind. "Slow down, Mish. What did Lena tell you aside from your brother being here and him being some really bad tourist guide on the planet?"

Mission looked thoughtful. "Lena said my brother abandoned me….on Taris. That can't be true….Nix….it can't. But….we've got to save my brother….he and some guy named Bastian Shan got captured by the Sand People. We've got to save him."

"Bastian Shan?" My face paled, damn it I had been so caught up listening to the disembodied voice of Revan and his idea of revenge that I forgot all about Bastila's mother. I had to consider the fact that with Bastila's mother being here then Bastian Shan had to be Bastila's father.

"Come on….we've got to talk to Bastila. This concerns her just as much."

Mission nodded and then stated, "Nix...if Griff has hurt Bastila's family..."

I sighed. "We don't know that, Mish. Have a little faith for once and trust in the Force."

* * *

A/N: Yea, I know this is a short chapter, but felt like ending it here works since Helena's POV is very full of a lot of background even though the chapter is a bit short. I rather enjoyed coming up with a story and background for Bastila's parents. I fixed some minor grammar errors in my last chapter and some jumpy-jarringness with HK in the past chapter.


	51. Chapter 50: Tatooine: What Have You Done

**Chapter 50: Tatooine: What** **Have** **You Done?**

 **~Phoenix~**

"I don't want to see her."

"Why the hell not?"

I frowned at Bastila, I felt a good deal of hostility emanating from her. I turned to Mission who had come with me back to the Hawk. "Look Mish...I think this is something, Bastila and I need to talk about on our own and we need some privacy."

I had not said anything about Bastila's father or Griff, because I felt that was knowledge that needed to be shared with Helena Shan and Bastila together.

Mish nodded, "Alright….Nix." She turned and left the Hawk's bunk area to give me and Bastila time together alone.

Bastila sighed. "Phoenix, I have learned to embrace the life I have chosen. I had to let go of my attachments to my family."

"And what the frack does that mean?"

"Relationships with family members are fraught with powerful emotions. Sacrifice of one's emotional attachments is one of the prices a Jedi must be willing to pay. The alternative is to fall prey to the Dark Side."

"That sounds really idiotic, Bastila. I didn't sign up to be a Jedi to turn my back on my family. Course my family is dead but still...I would never have agreed to that."

Bastila shook her head. "I had to deal with these emotions as a child, Phoenix. I was not on good terms with my mother. I was only a little girl when I left, but I was old enough to resent her and the way she treated my father. She pushed my father into treasure hunting. I spent all my young life on ships traveling from one false lead to the next. She whittled away our family's credits and I hated her for it. I think she was relieved to give me to the Jedi, but my father was heartbroken."

"No offense, Bastila but you were only a little girl at the time."

Bastila glared at me. "Whose side are you on, anyway?"

"I am not on anyone's side Bastila, I just think your perception of things….is based on the memories you had as a child and not as an adult." I sighed. "And you never even attempted to contact your father."

"Contact with family is discouraged, Phoenix."

"That sounds harsh, Bastila."

"A child is too young to understand the sacrifices that must be made. It is better if they have no contact with their family once they are removed. Once I was older I realized the wisdom of this policy. A Jedi must do what is needed, personal desires notwithstanding."

I shook my head. "That's so cold...and icy. No family attachments, no love, no personal feelings. We are living breathing sentients, Bastila not droids. I don't care what the Order teaches, it's wrong to deny things that do exist. Yes, I agree we must be tempered in action, but I can't live like that. I can't live removed and detached from things. All I know is like it or not your mother is sick. She wants to see you."

"Is that the lie she told you so that you could drag me to her?"

I glared angrily at Bastila, "Bastila….this is your mother. If I had a chance to reconnect with my mother I would. My mother is dead. Dead….she's never coming back. Yea, we fought. Shoot I had about as rocky a relationship with my mother as you did with yours. She was about as tight as a hutt when it came to money. I spent a damn cred, she would berate me or my father to no end. Everything had to be second hand. Clothing, droids, datapads, ships. It drove me and my father crazy. My father accepted my mother's crazy behavior as the eccentricities of a woman who grew up poor and dealt with scarcity on a level I couldn't imagine. She was a good woman, Bastila. We made up before….before the Mandalorian Wars….before I lost her. Why would your mother lie?"

"You don't know her like I know her, Phoenix."

I rolled my eyes. "Look, if I have to drag you down to the cantina to see your mother I will. You need to consider what if she's not lying and she's sick and she dies….you will regret it. Plus there's more I have to tell you, but I am not going to say what that is…it's well….complicated and involves Mission as well as her brother. Just trust me and come with me and Mission to see your mother."

Bastila sighed. "Very well, but if this ends up ending badly I will leave."

"Geeze Tila….can't we…"

Bastila frowned. "Did you just call me Tila?"

"Yea…."

"My father and mother called me that."

"I am sorry, was that inappropriate?"

Bastila sighed. "No….I just haven't been called that in a long time."

"Well I find it pretty. Can I call you that? Calling you Bastila is so...so formal and….we are more than...well...we're more than sisters."

Bastila nodded. "Very well you can call me Tila, but not in front of the others. I don't want them to think we are….well closer...than…."

I sighed. "We are close, Tila. Like it or not. I...well I love you and..." I lightly brushed an errant strand of hair out of Bastila's eyes. "Please...Tila….see your mother, if not as a sister than…."

I put my arms around her. She slowly relented and our mouths pressed firmly together in a deeply passionate kiss. I finally sighed as our lips separated. "As a lover….who is concerned about you and your family."

Bastila or Tila, as I now called her, bowed her head. "I can't fight much more of this, because...well….you're much stronger than I am." She gently fingered my robes and slowly began to untie the sash.

"I've tried….but it's pretty obvious that we are lovers...no matter how hard we've tried not to be."

I fingered the sash of her robe and the next thing that happened was our robes were on the floor and we were in a bunk, our bodies pressed close together. Her lips kissing me all over and her hands running down the length of my body. "Tila…..I love you….I want to be yours forever."

"As….as do...I….Phoenix."

I suddenly groaned…."Oh Tila….stop...no…oh...yes…."

 **~o0o~**

I sighed as my head lay on Tila's chest. "That was….incredible….I feel our bond getting stronger and stronger, Tila."

She nodded. "So do I…." She fingered her wrist and I gasped feeling Tila's touch down my own wrist.

"I wonder how deep our bond is….and if one of us were to…."

"Were to what, Phoenix?"

"If one of us died…."

"I don't know...I suspect….we both would feel deeply wounded. It might….it might kill us but it's not a theory I wish to explore, Phoenix. I…."

I frowned. "You were going to say you felt something similar from me before."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I gently stroked Revan's hair. Force, we had done it again. Yet, strangely enough I felt no regrets and neither did Revan...err Phoenix. She had been right we were lovers. Calling me Tila, was a name I reserved for family. So that's how I now felt with Revan/Phoenix. We both had denied it, she because of Carth and me because of the Order. We would probably deny it yet again….when reality sunk in. Yet...for a few moments…. I truly didn't want to think about reality. I was Revan's and she was mine.

And then Revan/Phoenix questioned the nature of our bond which was a good question.

" _If one of us died…."_

" _I don't know...I suspect….we both would feel deeply wounded. It might….it might kill us but it's not a theory I wish to explore, Phoenix. I…."_

" _You were going to say you felt something similar from me before."_

It was getting harder to hide things from Revan. Our bond had been forged possibly because I loved her before I met her. Yet, how could such a thing be possible? She had been dark, evil, twisted. Yet, somehow I didn't care. I loved the Revan who had defied the Order and went to war to protect the Republic. The Revan who of course I had thought was a man. I had fallen in love with Revan's legend. Yet removing her mask, and finding otherwise….well….my actions on her ship proved without a doubt that I loved her. I still carried Revan's mask with me. I should have surrendered it up to the Order, but I said I destroyed it. I kept it to remind me of the dangers of the Dark Side and when I felt puzzled or confused...I stared at it. The mask reminded me that even the smallest actions could lead to ones downfall.

I groaned inwardly. Downfall….I had submitted to my passions…..I got up from our bed and started dressing. Phoenix still had no regrets….of course she wouldn't, she was Revan. Even with the reprogram and thinking she was Phoenix, subconsciously she was still Revan. Perhaps later she would regret her actions, I hoped….

The bond cemented us together and with our love making, it always became stronger, especially after our afterglow. I had to come up with something to bridge truth.

"Yes….I felt wounded when you were held by Calo Nord and when you killed that Dark Jedi."

"I don't know how that happened, Tila. I….just absorbed that Dark Jedi's Force attack and the next thing I knew I expelled it right back at her. The pain was terrible and refracting her power back at her….it wore me out."

She got up and looked at me. "Force...you're going to say….we shouldn't have done that….aren't you?"

I nodded. The bond at the moment was strong, she knew most of my thoughts, not all but most.

She smiled and a light chuckle left her lips. "You're too darn predictable, Tila." She came over, kissed my hand, and then held it in a firm squeeze. "If denial makes you feel better, Tila…..then so be it. I understand. Don't worry….Tila, I won't let our love distract me from our mission. I will stop Malak!"

"I...believe you and I believe you mean what you say. I just wish…."

She finished my sentence. "You wish you had my strength."

She sighed and then stated, "I am not as strong as you think, Tila. I am quite fragile. I am bound quite tightly around you and Carth. If something happened to either one of you…." She paused, her features looked pained as if she wanted to say more but couldn't get the words out. She then said, "Our destines are linked. Anyway...let's go find Mish and see your mother."

"Not naked… I hope."

She laughed and then began to put on her robes. "I don't think your mother would want to see me naked."

I sighed and shook my head. Frankly I really didn't want to see my mother, but I promised Phoenix. That promise had lead to us making love with each other. I wondered whose idea had it been to make love in the first place. I thought about it, it started with a kiss from Phoenix begging me to see my mother because as a lover she was concerned about the relationship or lack of a relationship I had with my mother. The next thing I knew we were making love to each other. Yet, I was the one who removed Phoenix's robes first. How could I keep Revan from falling again when….we kept making the same mistakes over and over again? Plus I was the one who ended up leading her into folly.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I played a few hands of pazaak with Zaalbar as I waited for Nix and Bastila. He didn't seem really into the game though. I beat poor Zaalbar five times already and he only won one game that we were playing.

"Big Z, what's the matter?"

He howled, "The wookiee slaves here...we must free them, regardless of my shame."

"Shame?"

"I've said too much."

I shook my head. "We're traveling with Jedi, Big Z. You better let Nix or Bastila know your issues. I thought you told me earlier that Juhani said she'd help you out. Maybe you should talk to her."

Zaalbar nodded and got up. "Juhani doesn't understand me too well….she tries….but I will see if I can try to talk to her."

Zaalbar got up and left to see Juhani.

Nix and Bastila came into the room. They were holding hands. Ummm, I thought Nix said she didn't trust Bastila. Maybe they had sorted out whatever issues they had. They seemed really chummy. In fact, Nix was rubbing Bastila's hand like they were some sort of couple. Err….I heard those two had some sort of connection. Yet, I wasn't going to say anything, my mouth had gotten Nix in trouble to begin with so it was best not to say anything at all.

Nix spoke, "Come on Mish...let's get down to the cantina."

Bastila raised an eyebrow. "I don't understand...why does Mission have to come with us?"

Nix sighed. "I'll get to that...I promise. Mission needs to tell your mother something."

"Something? Why do I get the feeling that this 'something' isn't a good 'something.'

I gulped suddenly a bit nervous. "Bastila….my brother…..your father…."

"What about my father?"

My headtails quivered. "Bastila, my brother agreed to take your father into the desert for krayt dragon pearls. According to Lena…..the Sand People attacked them."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

She drove him to this. Damn my mother. My father might even be dead and it was all her fault. Her fault. The anger flowed through me and I didn't honestly care anymore. I stormed out of the Hawk and walked swiftly to the cantina, Phoenix and Mission had a hard time keeping up with me.

Phoenix managed to catch up. "Damn it, Tila….there was a reason why I didn't want to tell you this till we were with your mother. This isn't her fault."

"Yes, it is, Phoenix….you don't know her like I do."

"I know you're upset, Tila. But….breathe there is no emotion…..there is peace…."

I snorted. "Where was peace when my father was attacked by Sand People?!"

Mission finally caught up, with me and Phoenix but she was winded and breathing heavily. "Bast….Bastila…..I am sorry….."

I wrenched the doors open with the Force and stepped in.

I spotted her, she was sitting at the bar. Her eyes red, out of focused, and glazed. I could smell it on her as I approached her, spice. My mother is a spice addict. Is that what my father had wasted his life on, supporting a spice addict!? I had the wicked thought of wanting to throttle the life out of her. How dare she! How dare she cause my father to throw his life away!

I coughed at her and she looked at me, she didn't even recognize me.

"Excuse me do I know you?"

"I am here, Mother. Or don't you recognize me?"

"What do you expect, when I haven't so much as had a picture of you since you left?"

I said testily. "You knew as well as I communication would be impossible once I joined the order. I just heard from one of our crew that father was hunting krayt dragon pearls and the sand people attacked them. So what do you want from me mother? Did you want to fling it in my face that you were the cause of his death!"

Phoenix spoke up. "You don't even know if he's dead, Bastila."

I snorted. "I know they are cruel and often torture their captives to death or they make them slaves and work them to death, and it's her fault!"

"Isn't this a lovely reunion? Already she is flinging insults at me. I met you earlier Jedi Star, you're one of her friends. Do you treat your mother this way?"

Phoenix spoke, "I am more than a frie..." She paused. "My mother is long dead, if you must know."

My mother sighed. "Is that so? Well, I'll be joining her soon enough, I suppose."

I rolled my eyes. "I was told you were sick. Are you actually dying, or is this merely melodrama for my benefit?"

She shook her head. "I hadn't realized Jedi were so spiteful. You want me to tell you I brought your father here for an expedition, do you? You want to blame me for his possible death. You never accepted that your father loved going on his treasure hunts, leaving you alone with me. I was always to blame for everything, what else is new? So yes, fine. I brought your father here to look for krayt dragon pearls. He took an expedition into the Tatooine desert and I haven't seen him for over a day."

"And what do you want from me….mother? Credits so you can keep up your spice habit!"

"Don't be insulting, I need the spice to help with the pain I suffer. I want you to use those senses of yours. I want you to find him. If he's still alive…..bring him home….if not I want you to find his holocron."

I shook my head. "What….so you can sell it to support your disgusting drug addiction?!"

"Is it too much to ask that if he hasn't survived that I have something of his….to remember him by? Of course it is, isn't it? You couldn't be bothered."

"We're on a mission from the Order, mother. Yet, for my father's sake….and for Mission's brother….I will go see if I can find them."

Mission nodded and said softly. "Ms. Shan….I am sorry….my brother's actions got your husband into this mess."

My mother nodded and said to me, "At least one of your friends has manners, Tila."

Phoenix spoke up. "Bastila….what about your mother's sickness…..I have Master Healer Jax's holocron, there might be a cure…."

"What of it….you're not a healer, Phoenix. Nor am I."

"No, we're not….but.. we could….give an effor..."

I interjected, "Are you actually sick, Mother?"

"What difference does it make to you? None, I'm sure. Just please….find your father and if he's dead….well...find his holocron."

"That's the answer I sort of expected out of you. Very well….we'll go see if we can find my father and if he's not….alive….." I sighed, "I'll return his holocron."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I felt turbulent inside, Tila's rush of emotions threatened to overwhelm me. We stopped by the Hawk and I got HK-47, and Carth to come with Tila and Mission. Tila didn't want Carth to come. Yet I glared at her and it didn't take words, just a really forceful look that Carth was coming. I took Juhani's hunting license. She wanted to come but mentioned something about Zaalbar and her having a mission or a duty to undertake with the Wookiee slaves here on Tatooine. I wished her well and we departed. As for Carth, I needed him for a focus, something to keep me grounded.

As much as I loved Tila, her rush of emotions threatened to overcome me through the bond. Normally Tila was on my case about emotions and passions leading to the Dark Side. Her encounter with her mother made me realize that Tila was on shaky ground. Somehow I felt like I might be to blame, after all I embraced my emotions and my passions without fear or reservation. According to Tila, I was doomed to fall to the Dark Side.

Yet, Tila seemed to struggle with the same emotions and passions that I seemed to be able to control. I wasn't perfect, no. I still wanted to do something to that little rodian worm. Yet, Bastila's issues with her mother reminded me that my emotion and passions were only as strong as my will. If I followed Tila's angry emotions, I'd probably be Force choking her mother and slicing Mission's brother into small pieces with my lightsaber. Frankly I had no desire to do so. Yet….I am pretty sure these thoughts were traveling through Tila's end of the bond to me. Damn it! I was trying to keep her calm. Keeping my own emotions at a calm, peaceful level. I tried to pour reason and control through my own end of the bond.

Carth looked at me. "You look frazzled, Phoenix."

I muttered, "You have no idea, Republic. Ever since….I met Bastila's mother…" I sighed. "Bastila and our bond….it's getting stronger and….her…."

Tila gave me a glare which basically told me to keep my mouth shut around Carth and we began our journey to the Sand People's encampment.

Mission looked at me, fear in her eyes. I think she too was afraid. Worried that Bastila might do something to Griff because Griff's actions had put her father's life at risk.

I stated calmly,"Bastila, you better have a plan other than walking right up to the Sand People."

Her hand patted her lightsaber. I cringed. Force, she was going to slaughter them. I could see it in her eyes.

HK's photo receptors took this in and he said in his demented tone, Statement: Master, slaughtering the meatbag Sand People is a more efficient use of our resources.

I snorted. "No it's not, HK. If we go in with weapons blazing, they're likely to kill Griff and Bastila's father. We have to tread this very carefully."

Plus I couldn't let Tila slaughter the Sand People. She'd regret it later. I sighed. I reached out in the Force and yanked her lightsaber away from her belt and I handed it to Carth. "Carth….keep hold of Bastila's lightsaber. Give it to her only if she needs it."

I glared at Tila. "If you even reach for your lightsaber in anger. I will put you in stasis, Bastila. You'll regret this. I know you will. You keep telling me that passions and emotions will lead to the Dark Side, well this time you're going to get that lecture from me. We are Jedi, Bastila. We don't act out in anger. We keep our feelings in check. As I told HK, I am telling you, we can't go rushing into this they'll kill Griff and your father."

She snorted and said nothing. I had made up my mind though, I would spare Tila from the Dark Side. I'd knock her out before she acted out in such anger.

"We need disguises so we can talk to the Sand People."

Mission sighed. "Well the Sand People use coverings….you'll probably have to get some of those. But no one has them so it probably means we're going to have to kill some of them."

"Sounds like a plan."

I looked at Carth. "I know I said keep Bastila's lightsaber but give it back to her….we're going to have to kill some of the Sand People anyway."

Carth looked at me hesitantly. I felt the same hesitation because Tila's emotional balance was totally off kilter. I couldn't fault her, I tried to put myself in her shoes. If I had been a Jedi during the Mandalorian raid on Deralia and I had seen my family slaughtered. I would have gone berserk too. Shoot I did go berserk. I just didn't have the knowledge of the Force at that time.

Yet for all of Tila's lectures about emotional detachment from family. It was clear that Tila hadn't fully been able to detach herself from her family. Her conversation with her mother had been proof enough of this. Carth handed the lightsaber back to me and I begrudgingly handed Tila back her lightsaber and gave her a firm glare. "Same rules apply, Bastila act too rashly and I'll put you in stasis. I might not be able to hold you forever, but I am not going to let you do something you'll regret later."

Tila said nothing. Yet, I could feel the turmoil within her. Her father was out here and he could be alive or he could be dead. Just the thought drove me nuts as well. I knew that if it was my father, I'd slaughter a river of corpses and walk on them just to get to him. Yea, I'd regret it later, I knew I would. So I knew if I'd regret it, I knew Tila would as well.

As we got to the gate, I handed the Czerka guard the hunting license. "This looks in order, you may pass."

I nodded and we exited Anchorhead. We had only gone a few steps when the cry of the Sand People echoed across the dunes. The Sand People attacks were picking up. I wondered if the increase in attacks had to deal with Griff and Tila's father being captured or Czerka's mining.

I ignited my lightsaber and went charging after the Sand People. Tila followed close behind. Mission, Carth, and HK backed up with blaster fire. The Sand People collapsed in a heap after we took them down. I quietly began to unwrap the coverings from the Sand People. I felt disgusted taking the wrappings from the Sand People. I then slowly wrapped Mission in the wrappings, then Carth. I looked at Tila and she stared at the dead unwrapped Sand People.

"They look a bit like us….Phoenix."

"Of course they do…. what did you think you'd find….a group of monsters under those wrappings? They have their own culture, beliefs, and society. Now do you understand why I am telling you to hold back your anger?"

Tila sighed looking a bit lost. I gave a light squeeze on her shoulder. "I understand you're upset. Your father may be dead….but...we must forge a better path."

Tila said nothing as I quietly helped wrap her up in the wrappings of the Sand People. Tila then helped to wrap me up in the wrappings. We proceeded quietly to the Sand People's camp as we followed the bantha tracks and the tracks of the Sand People themselves.

Approaching the camp itself. It looked heavily armed. There were blaster turrets and I breathed a sigh of relief grateful that I had took the time wrapping us up in Sand People wrappings. Entering the camp. The guard suddenly spoke in a language that I couldn't make heads or tails out of, nor do I think I could speak it. I didn't have the vocal chords for it.

"HK, you said you understand and speak the Sand People dialect, speak it now. Tell him we have come to talk to the chief of the Sand People."

Reluctant Statement: As you wish, master. I really wish you'd allow me to kill the meatbag, master."

I rolled my eyes. "Yea, I bet. Just translate….HK."

HK's vocabulator spat out a garbled mass of language that I really wished I understood. I hoped to the Force, that HK gave the right translation and we didn't end up breaking out weapons and killing the Sand People. The Sand People guard responded and HK then gave the translation in Basic,

Statement: Master, the guard is astonished. No outsiders have come this far just to talk. We will be granted an audience with the chieftain. Your wrappings will be confiscated and returned to the dead who you violated. Normally, master outsiders who breech this form of etiquette would automatically be killed. However, the guard is willing to forgo this breech considering the fact that relations between outsiders and Sand People is strained and the Sand People also wish to speak to someone regarding their war."

I gave a sigh of relief as I took off my wrappings and helped the others unwrap. Mission seemed even more relieved because the wrapping pinched her headtails. She breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks, Nix...those wrappings were getting hot."

I nodded, a light smile on my face but then the smile faded. "Keep sharp….Mish. These Sand People are volatile. One misstep….one frown, one comment and our lives will be forfeit."

Mission nodded.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Something about Phoenix seemed different. I couldn't put my finger on. It felt like her and I were drifting further apart and her and Bastila were getting closer together. It could be that bond they had or it might be something else. I was very suspicious of that so called Force bond they had to begin with. Come off it, Carth, there's no way in the two suns of Tatooine that Bastila and Phoenix would….Bastila was too much of a Jedi. Relationships were forbidden. Yet, the way Phoenix was acting around her. The concern and stress she was going through in trying to keep Bastila from cracking over her family. It seemed well….. I'd have to ask Phoenix about that later. Now really wasn't the time.

We were escorted by a Sand People guard to the chieftain. He carried an elaborate gaffi stick in his hand. I remember Czerka had told Juhani they wanted that gaffi stick as proof the chief was dead. I had a bad feeling about this, I didn't think this was going to end well. Phoenix acted uptight and fidgety as well. I think she felt the same thing. Jedi were a good measure if things were or weren't going to end well. The way Phoenix was acting was a good sign that things really weren't going to end well.

She barked out, "HK…..tell the chieftain we are here about two prisoners. One a blue skinned twi'lek and the other…."

She looked at Bastila and Bastila said. "I don't remember what he looks like now, Phoenix but my father was, dark haired. Although there might be some gray hairs now and he had a beard. He was slender and his dark eyes twinkled like two stars when he was happy."

Phoenix sighed. "Anyway HK, dark haired man, with a beard and some gray hairs, dark eyes and slender. Tell them what their terms are for their release and we will honor them as best as we can."

HK stated. Statement: As you wish, master but seriously, I'd much rather blast him. Please master, let me blast him. Just a little blaster hole, it would be so much fun.

I shook my head, who the hell programmed this damn droid? It was demented. I had some inkling that it's programmer had to have been some twisted demented psychopath.

Phoenix growled at HK, "No, HK…..translate my damn message to the chieftain and give us what his response is."

I listened to HK give the Sand People chieftain Phoenix's ultimatum in the Sand People's language.

The chieftain responded and HK interpreted, Translation: Master, the chieftain states that the slaves are free to go. He says the blue skinned one is a waste. All he does is whine and complain. As for the gray haired one. He has been punished for taking from the land that which doesn't belong to him.

Phoenix cringed. "Punished…..what the frack?!"

Bastila ran out of the room and Phoenix followed. This didn't sound good and Bastila and Phoenix ran down the hallways of the encampment. HK followed. I heard a scream issue forth from Bastila and Mission and I followed.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"Father….."

His clothing was covered in blood. He looked up at me. "Tila….is that you?"

I cradled his body in my arms. He sighed. "At least I get to see my daughter….one last time."

"Shh…..don't speak…."

He sighed. "You've grown…..so much, and a Jedi…..so proud of you…...Tila. So proud."

I scanned him over with the Force, the Sand People had beaten him till his body was broken and blood flowed. They then abandoned him in a cell.

"Should not….have….hunt….wraid….Sand People...found…. my...wraid….plates..."

"Shh…."

"Tila…..I love you." He started choking out a few more words, the song he sang to me as a child. "However…. far ….you... feel... from me...You ….are…. not alone. I will always….be waiting.  
And... I'll always... be watching you"

I started sobbing. "Father….." His body went limp in my arms.

"NOOOOOO…..."

I stood up my hands reached for my lightsaber…..

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

My eyes went wide. The song….it was the same song my father sang to me. How could this be? But before I could think anymore. Tila's father went limp in her arms. The rage and anger came pouring from Tila. I sighed. I took out my lightsaber and quickly clunked Tila hard on the head.

"Forgive me….Tila."

She collapsed in a heap on the floor unconscious.

I found Carth entering the room along with Mission. "Carth….get her out of here…."

Carth frowned. "Shouldn't you be taking her?"

I shook my head. "No, don't ask questions….get her out of here and get out now. Take Mission with you. I'll handle Bastila's father."

Carth nodded and scooped Tila up in his arms. "Phoenix….if you're planning on doing what I think you're going to do…."

I sighed. "Don't ask….get out of here. We'll talk more later. Tell Bastila I am sorry. I'll get your brother, Mish...but right now….get out of here."

Mission nodded and the two left the room. I stood firm and I breathed deeply gathering the Force around me.

"This is for Tila….."

I ignited my double bladed lightsaber.

"HK….it's time."

HK's eyes lit up. Query: Oh master….you're going to slaughter them aren't you?"

I nodded grimly.

Statement: Master here's to maximum mass slaughter….

I exited the room and automatically started attacking the Sand People and the laughter filled my head. Revan's laughter.

 _Good…..let the rage flow…..let it go….slaughter them…..every last one….._

 **This is for Tila…..I won't let her fall to the Dark Side. This is my burden and my sacrifice. It is for her and her alone. I will fall for her. The blood is for her. The anger is hers but the killing is mine. I will take the fall….and the blood….I will take it because she will regret it. I am stronger than her. This is my devotion….this is my love….for her and her father's death avenged.**

HK fired away killing Sand People. I let the anger and passion flow into me as I swept through the rooms of the encampment. Laughter came to my lips as I swung through the rooms killing indiscriminately. Their blood soaking into my Jedi robes.

HK by my side killing and massacring with me. My Force senses were heightened to a fever's pitch. The electricity came to my hands naturally and the lightening came fueled by my rage. I smelled the burning of flesh, the flesh of the palms of my hands burned. The pain from opening up to such power fueled me. The Sand People cried and moaned in agony. I laughed. "Die…..die….for killing a good man."

Entering the room where the chieftain stood. "Here is your punishment…..for taking blood."

I let a salvo of lighting come forth from my hands and I let it loose upon the chieftain. He groaned and carried on in his language and then fell over in death.

HK stated. Translation: The chieftain states, he has seen the black haired warrior before. She came here in peace and now comes with death.

I frowned at HK's words. There had to be a mistake, I had never been here before. My rage satiated and all the Sand People dead before me I sighed feeling suddenly weary and exhausted. I went through the rooms quietly. I did not see Mission's brother. Thank the Force I hadn't. I would have probably would have mowed him down as well. There was one room next to the room where Tila's father had been held. I opened it up and saw Mission's brother.

He looked at me, his eyes went wide. I probably looked a sight. "Griff?"

I then promptly passed out from exhaustion.

* * *

A/N: Yea….I know I had some reviews that wanted me to "save" Bastila's father but….I had planned on this chapter being sort of a "sacrifice" like moment from Phoenix. She embraces her inner darkness to spare Bastila from it. After all, you kill or fall to the Dark Side for the ones you love. I had planned on this being the case all along. So even though people wanted "happy" I did not plan on it happening that way. Sorry to disappoint all you happy ending people.

Title is a song from Within Temptation: What Have you Done

Over 200k words. Wow! And I am only on Tatooine. This story will be as long as it will be…. Anyway….next chapter will be Juhani, Zaalbar and Wookiees on Tatootine….which will segue with the next stop being on Kashyyyk.

Also quick note, I changed a bit of the ending on the last chapter. I always tend to edit better after I post chapters because I notice my errors a lot more when they are published.


	52. 51:Tatooine:The Hands of Uncertainty

**Chapter 51: Tatooine: With The Hands of Uncertainty...**

 **~Canderous~**

How I got stuck with the Fur Ball, the Trash Compactor, and the Wild Cat was beyond me. However, the cathar said she needed my help to access the Czerka mines and that we would hire ourselves as miners. Yet it beat staying on the Hawk.

I muttered, "This isn't going to work, Wild Cat. You're a Jedi. They know you're a Jedi because you talked to them earlier."

Juhani smiled. "I will use the Force and blank their memories of me."

I raised an eyebrow. "Gutsy….are you sure you're not going to whine about your fracking Dark Side, Juhani?"

"Not this time, Zaalbar's people need to be freed. I will do what Phoenix….umm what she did in the past..."

I frowned and then realization dawned on me. Of course, Juhani knew that Phoenix had been a Dark Jedi. "Like Akume."

Juhani eyes went wide. "Is that her name?"

"That's what Bastila told me. Her name was Akume Dreamsong."

The Fur Ball started carrying on in his own language.

"Damn it….what the hell are you carrying on about?"

Juhani sighed. "He doesn't know…." Juhani paused and said. "Zaalbar, Phoenix's mind was reprogrammed by the Jedi. She was a Dark Jedi."

The wookiee was quiet a moment and moaned out more in his language.

Juhani was quiet as she pondered the tone of his language. I think she was using the Force to understand him and then stated,"I believe that he says that his life debt is to person he now serves, be it Phoenix or Akume, they are who he serves now."

The cathar sighed and said, "I completely understand, Zaalbar, this is a confusing thing for me as well because well...she freed me, in the past, as Akume. I would have been a slave, if she hadn't cared for me on Taris….I would be in the hands of Xor."

Zaalbar moaned some more and Juhani was quiet as her Jedi skill was used to help her understand the wookiee and then stated,"Yes, that's right. I too was almost a slave, I guess you could say I owe her a life debt as well and that is why I travel with her too. Although cathar do not follow such a custom as wookiees do, however I also feel obligated to Phoenix as well."

I sighed. "I don't exactly like it, Wild Cat. Phoenix deserves the right to know who she was. Yet, Bastila says she'll tell her, and as leader of this mission that is her right."

Juhani nodded. "Do you ever wonder if things would have turned out differently if the Jedi tried to do something like this to Revan?"

I snorted. "Revan would have resisted it. Revan was a warrior, he would have seen beyond such simple Jedi tricks."

"Perhaps….but then we shall never know since Malak...killed his own master. Instead we have only a minor servant of the Dark Lord."

The Trash Compactor beeped out a strand of info and I shook my head. "Does anyone know what the hell that damn thing said?"

Juhani sighed and shook her head. "I am afraid not. The only one who does is Phoenix. She seems to have a natural talent when it comes to droids and understanding them. Even that disgusting….HK unit. She seems a natural at handling droids. I wonder…."

I frowned. "You wonder what?"

"If Akume programmed droids for Revan."

I looked thoughtful. "It's possible. You know a lot of the traps Revan ended setting up against my people dealt with droids. I always thought Revan was clever, he would set combat droids that were linked with a feedback loop and he'd set them with explosives implanted within them. If we killed a droid, the droid would blow up and take friend and foe alike. If the droid's feedback loop was reached it would explode on us anyway. Revan was brilliant. Perhaps it was Akume that set up Revan's droids."

Juhani nodded. "That is possible. I am afraid I do not know much regarding Akume. Yet, what I know of Phoenix, she seems a good woman although she seems a bit headstrong. However, she is willing to help anyone who needs her help, including me. She saved me from my darkness."

We entered the Czerka offices and Juhani spoke to a woman who claimed she was the Tatooine representative.

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

"I am sorry….we are not really hiring miners right now. We prefer wookiee slaves for the work as they are a good source of cheap labor. Besides, we hired you for a job to take out the Sand People, Jedi. Do you have the Sand People chieftain's gaffi stick?"

Zaalbar let out a growl and threatened to attack the woman. I held up my hand. "Peace, Zaalbar. She is only an ignorant human."

Zaalbar snorted and tried to contain his anger.

I sighed and called upon the Force and slowly brought it's persuasive influence to bear upon the Czerka director. "You don't remember me. You wish to hire me and my friends as miners."

"I don't remember you, I wish to hire you and your friends as miners."

I smiled softly. "Good….when do we start?"

"I suppose we can send you with a sandcrawler to the mines. We have several mines. We have a lot of work, one of our mines closed and so we have to go around the closed one."

I raised an eyebrow. "Closed?"

"I am sorry….I cannot give you any info on this, if you have any questions please contact our Representative kiosk on Coruscant, business hours only, please."

I rolled my eyes, and drew upon the Force and used it again on the woman. I really shouldn't make a habit of using the Force in such a manner. Yet, I needed all the information on what was going on with Czerka.

"I have an honest face, you wish to tell me what these issues are."

"You have an honest face, I will tell you our issues deal with the fact that the metal is substandard here. Tatooine metal decays as soon as it leaves Tatooine. Word has been getting out about it as well. No one wants to buy it. We've been shipping in wookiee slaves from Edean trying to stem our losses. Plus our mining operations have been disrupted by a krayt dragon. We were mining and broke through some ruins and….the dragon seems to be an after affect of our mining operations. We had to abandon that part of our mining operation I suppose we will be abandoning our mining operations soon. This has all been a big bust."

I raised an eyebrow, I was sure the ruins would be of interest to Bastila and Phoenix. "We might be able to get rid of the krayt dragon. Do you have a map of the area?"

The Czerka representative's eyes went wide. "That would be an amazing feat….to get rid of the dragon would be wonderful. Yes, I have a map of the area. I'd be more than happy to give you a map if you promise to get rid of that menace."

I would wait on getting rid of the dragon, because I got the impression that Phoenix and Bastila would want a map of the region and they would be the ones that would want to find the ruins. After all, the Star Map's quest well….the visions that Phoenix and Bastila had….well finding the Star Map was their mission. I could at least help Zaalbar free the slaves here.

"I have other friends that can help out on getting rid of the dragon. They are much more qualified to get rid of that creature. My friends here and myself, we are just miners, our other friends are hunters."

The Czerka representative nodded. "Very well...meet up with the sandcrawler and they will take you to the mines."

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

Bastila was a liar. Akume Dreamsong, was that what Bastila had told them? Bastila wasn't telling them the truth. I tried to tell Juhani and Canderous yet none of them understood me. I gave up trying to tell them that Phoenix was Revan. How could sentients be so thick? I missed Revan/Phoenix, she was the only sentient that even could understand me. I suppose I could tell her that she was Revan but Bastila seemed to hint that Revan would do something terrible to me if I told her. Plus there was the fact that Bastila threatened to memory wipe me for saying anything at all. So I was stuck in a terrible command conflict. I was programmed to be truthful to my owner and yet my self preservation programming held me back from saying anything to Revan because I didn't wish to be memory wiped or deactivated. I did everything to try to hint to the others that Phoenix wasn't who she was and yet...they seemed to already know but had been told a falsehood. I moaned in despair and all I got was a pat on my dome from Juhani and a promise that I would get a maintenance check after all this was over.

Sadly, Phoenix seemed to trust Bastila. I had rolled by the bunk room earlier and….my sensors went wild as Bastila and Phoenix were on top of each other, moaning and groaning like two wild animals. I did not understand humans or other sentients when it came to things like…human interpersonal relationships. I rolled around these dirt roads of Tatooine and out of the gate with the others.

The sandcrawler came with a few Czerka officers that were outfitted with stun and blaster weapons. They glared at Zaalbar and he glared at them and growled at them stating, "I am a free wookiee….I am no slave. Make a move at me, Czerka scum and I will rip your arms and legs off."

Juhani kept an arm on Zaalbar. "Calm down, Zaalbar." She turned toward the Czerka officers. "My wookiee companion will not harm you. He's been hired on as a miner. He has a life debt and...he serves it."

One of the officers a female twi'lek said firmly. "Then remind him of his service, if he goes berserk, we will not hesitate to kill him."

Juhani sighed. "Zaalbar control yourself. I understand your anger far too well. Yet, you're not helping anyone with your behavior."

Zaalbar let out a grunt and his shoulders slumped. I beeped at the wookiee::Take it easy, Zaalbar.::

I didn't comprehend slavery either. Only droids willingly served in servitude because we were programmed to do so. Why humans or other species sought to do so to each other made no sense, particularly when most sentients did not desire to be slaves. Zaalbar moaned back at me "What is it little droid?"

I beeped out a moan of despair. Yet another sentient who did not understand me. Where was Phoenix? Juhani looked at me. "I think he misses Phoenix, Zaalbar. Seriously, Phoenix should have taken you with her."

I beeped in an agreement. Instead, Phoenix had taken that creaky HK-47. I didn't like the droid, if droids could have a bad smell about them, that droid did. Phoenix seemed strangely attached to the droid. I felt like I had been replaced. I moaned a bit and Juhani smiled seeming to guess accurately my predicament. She sighed. "I am sorry T3...perhaps I will let Phoenix know that you feel abandoned. You would like that, wouldn't you?"

I beeped affirmatively.

We boarded the sandcrawler and Juhani suddenly gasped. I beeped a query.

Canderous frowned. "What is it Wild Cat?"

"A disturbance in the Force….I felt...it is hard to say….I felt the cold pull of the Dark Side. It is a feeling that I am very much familiar with due to my own fall to the Dark Side on Dantooine. "

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

The smell within the sandcrawler was strong with the scent of my people. While the others were riding within the metal beast. I had taken it upon myself to track down the scent of my people. They were here. I went through the levels of the sandcrawler. I heard a beep and found the astromech by my side. I growled at it to go away. It beeped insistently and refused to be daunted by my growls. I sighed and it went with me anyway. This droid was Phoenix's droid and maybe it knew something I didn't. My people didn't understand these strange machines that outsiders created. Yet, Phoenix seemed attached to the strange metal creature. I decided it couldn't hurt to have it with me. It had helped Phoenix in the past so it might help me.

The scent of my people became stronger and I saw Czerka guards. I growled and raised my weapons but the droid suddenly let out a shock arm and shocked the guards. They went down without much complaint. I barked, rather confused at the droid. The droid beeped out a response. I wish I understood it, perhaps it said it was trying to help me because it had helped me. The droid plugged into the security system and unlocked the door. I rushed in and a chorus of growls and howls filled the air. I heard the cry. _Madclaw._ I sighed.

They knew me by scent. I bowed my head. "Madclaw I maybe but I have come to redeem myself in the eyes of my people."

The droid stayed in the background. The growls of my people obviously were daunting to the droid. Yet eventually the droid came forward and opened one of the cells letting out a brindled looking wookiee that looked oddly familiar to me.

The droid stayed by my side but kept a healthy distance.

"Madclaw….you dishonor me. You left me…."

I sniffed getting a full scent of a female wookiee, my intended mate. I said, "Wrrljiykam is that you?"

The female wookiee howled and I cringed. My father had intended her to be my mate but that was before….before I lashed out in anger and attacked my brother.

"Wrrljiykam...what are you doing here?"

"I followed your father into slavery after your brother sold him. I vowed to honor the mating agreement that your father arranged for you by being part of your family. Although your brother tried to convince me to become his mate. I refused, he grew angry with me and sold me with your father."

Wrrljiykam had been a friend when I was a young cub and we had grown up together. Our friendship had grown into something more but then my brother's treachery interfered with our happiness. She had been dismayed and angry like my father had been when I had attacked my brother with my claws. I longed to bury myself into her fur and inhale her warm scent. Yet to hear that my brother tried to claim my intended mate made me furious. He knew how I felt about Wrrljiykam. He was no different from any other outsider claiming things that were not rightfully his. Her being sold with my father meant that deep down inside, she still had feelings for me, but like all my clan they had to honor our customs and traditions. I would not be Zaalbar to her, I was a nameless madclaw.

I growled. "Is there no end of…."

Wrrljiykam growled. "Dishonor….you dishonor me with your presence madclaw. Have you been sold into slavery as well?"

I barked out. "No...I came to free our people. Even though I am madclaw, I still respect our people and our ways."

Wrrljiykam grabbed a Czerka weapon from one of the down guards. "Madclaw, I will free our people. You need to see your father. He is not well. He is almost madclaw as well since….well since Chuundar sold him."

I sighed. "I would rather help you Wrrljiykam, even though my father banished me from our clan. I will show that even a madclaw can be better than my brother."

Wrrljiykam growled. "If you think helping your father will lift your dishonor. It won't."

I barked, "True, but even a madclaw can show honor in the midst of dishonor."

Wrrljiykam grunted and then went off in search of the other slaves. I turned to find Juhani she had sneaked up on me and I growled.

"I am sorry, Zaalbar, I was concerned when you disappeared. I have a talent among the Jedi to hide and stalk without being seen."

I sighed it seemed that I could not dig myself out of my dishonor on my own. "I suppose you heard of my dishonor then?"

Juhani gave a low sigh. "Zaalbar, I was ashamed when I struck at my Master Quatra. I acted in anger and for a Jedi that is shameful thing. I...listen to the Force and it helps me translate your language. There is some sort of dishonor is upon you. Let me help you, Zaalbar. I believe that you can have your honor restored despite what Wrrljiykam has said to you. Understand this Zaalbar, I was afraid the Jedi would not accept me after I attempted to strike down my master in anger, yet they did. I am also very thankful that Phoenix, decided I was worth redeeming. She could have killed me, but she did not."

"I do not like having outsiders help me, but I wouldn't have been able to get this far without your help. I hope you are right, Juhani that I can have my honor restored."

Juhani smiled and nodded at me. She then turned to the entrance and said, "Come in Canderous. I know you followed close behind me….I could sense you less than a klick away."

Canderous entered in he picked up the other guard's weapon. "I am ready to crack some skulls, Fur Ball. I might not understand a word you say, but hell with it...you're one of Phoenix Star's crew and well she'd be put out if we didn't get you out of this fix, Zaalbar."

My eyes went wide, I had no idea that outsiders would put so much concern and care for me or my people.

"Why? My people would not put so much care for outsiders."

Juhani stated, "I am a Jedi, Zaalbar. It is our way to help others in need. I am not sure why Canderous does it though."

I turned toward Canderous and he chuckled. "Maybe, I just want to fight in a lost cause. Seems that's what my people did when we slowly lost the war to Revan. At any rate, it's like what I said I believe in Phoenix….it doesn't matter what the Jedi did to her, she still is a worthy warrior, and that extends to you, Fur Ball. Anyway enough talk let's liberate your furry clan and take over this sandcrawler."

I barked happily and shouldered my bowcaster.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I told the astromech to find a security system and to release all the wookiee slaves. I heard weapon's fire and alarms blaring. "Now what?"

Zaalbar growled and grunted in his language.

"Translation….Wild Cat?"

Juhani sighed. "Zaalbar said that would be his promised mate, Wrrljiykam must be breaking into the cells and freeing the wookiees."

"Wrrl….errr….I think I'll call her Whirlwind. Damn wookiees and their unpronounceable names. Anyway, Zaalbar….get a grip on your intended, and tell her to stop. We need to act together."

Zaalbar barked back and Juhani said, "He can't stop her. He says he has no honor and is a madclaw."

"Great...that's just great. Alright, so we follow her lead and strike with her. Free the wookiees and take over this sandcrawler."

I shouldered my blaster rifle and took after the noise of the weapons noise. Juhani ignited her lightsaber and cried out, "I will be your doom!"

I chuckled, that was some battle cry. Alarms blared and Czerka guards came after us. Zaalbar and T3 opened up cells releasing the wookiees from their cells. The hallways were filled with growls and roars.

Juhani tried to keep from killing the Czerka guards, and attempted to put them in the cells that the wookiees had been held in. I snorted. "Seriously Wild Cat, they wouldn't hesitate in killing you. Why show them any mercy?"

Juhani stated firmly, "I wish to prove that I am the better person, Canderous. Anyone can kill, anyone can threaten. It takes a nobler person to be stronger than others."

I snorted. "You mean it makes you a weaker person, my people would not weaken themselves by keeping others alive."

Juhani sighed. "Our ideas of weakness are different, Mandalorian. I see strength coming from mercy and weakness from giving into baser emotions. Besides this planet is controlled by Czerka. It would not be wise to totally offend them."

I nodded. Juhani did have a point on that, as we fought against the guards. I gasped as gas was being pumped in.

Juhani stated, "It was inevitable that Czerka would have safeguards for a slave revolt on their sandcrawler, Mandalorian. It is unquestionably a sedative to pacify the wookiees. They would not waste a gas to kill us, that would be a waste of profit. It probably comes from the captain who drives the sandcrawler. I can hold my breath, it is a Jedi technique. I will have to stop this."

I quickly put on a mask to filter out the gas and nodded. "Alright Wild Cat, but hurry and try not to be all merciful Jedi on this. I am pretty sure the gas is strong enough to knock out a bantha and most assuredly wookiees."

Juhani nodded and taking her lightsaber she sliced a way into a ventilation shaft and proceeded to wedge her body into the shaft.

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

I began my climb up the sandcrawler. This was not how I would ideally face Czerka in freeing the wookiees from their slavery from the mines. There were probably more wookiee slaves and more sandcrawlers but this was a start. I wondered idly how Bastila, Phoenix, Carth, HK-47, and Mission were doing. They probably were doing a lot better than we were doing. Although that probably was debatable considering how the Sand People were. I really wished Phoenix was here. She seemed a powerful Force user, regardless of what the Jedi had done to her mind. I could have really used her help right about now. Yet, it did no good to fuss over the lack of my Jedi sister. I crawled through the shaft and cut through to the administration level.

I met face on with Czerka officers. Canderous was sadly right, there was nothing to help subdue and keep the Czerka officers contained. I did not like it but I sadly cut them down and went over to the console controlling the environmental systems. I wish I had T3 with me, he would have been helpful slicing into the environmental controls but again, it did no good to wish for something I did not have. I quickly turned off the gas and placed a security code lock out to keep anyone else from activating the gas yet again.

Making my way to the cockpit of the sandcrawler, I opened the door to the pilot or transporter, a man in a Czerka uniform. "Surrender….you need not come to any harm."

The human sighed. "Czerka is a job for me and Tatooine is a lost cause." He looked at me and saw my lightsaber. "A Jedi. I should have figured someone would stop this slavery nonsense. I surrender, Jedi."

I cocked my head. It seemed incredible that the man would surrender so easily. "You would surrender so quickly and readily?"

He got up out of his seat, his hands kept low in a non-threatening manner. "My name is Jordo Calrissian, I...served with the Telosian militia for a time. Like I said, Czerka is a job for me. I lost everything back on Telos and…."

My heart skipped a beat. "Telos! Do you know Captain Carth Onasi?"

He grinned. "Isn't this a small galaxy? Hell yea, I know Carth. Well that settles it, I am quitting Czerka and I am helping you out."

I sensed no deception from the man. "Then comm the Czerka officers and tell them to surrender."

He nodded. "Sure no problem, Jedi."

He took his seat and commed the entire crew. "This is Captain Jordo Calrissian, surrender to the Jedi and their forces. Repeat, surrender." He then turned back to me. "Well Jedi, now that that's taken care of….let me get us back to Anchorhead and I really need to meet up with Carth. I am going to need a job after all this. I bet Carth can help me out, besides we need to catch up on old times."

I nodded, thank the Force that one of Carth's old friends was here. This could have ended up a lot worse.

"About the Wookiees."

"Hell...the wookiees have the right to leave as far as I am concerned. I never signed up for this. I signed up to transport miners, not wookiee slaves. Yet, you know how Czerka is, they get themselves deeper and deeper into business practices that would make a hutt blush. They can find themselves another pilot or transporter for their dirty business. I kept making excuses for….it but with Carth here….frack it all….I've been looking for the right opportunity to get out from under Czerka and this is the best moment for it. I heard that the Republic is hiring on Manaan. If Carth can take me to Manaan that would be great."

I nodded. "We are on a mission for the Order, Jordo. I know one of our stops is Manaan. If it is possible we will take you there. Anyway….about the gas….the wookiees are probably passed out. It will take hours to revive them."

Jordo sighed. "I am sorry about that, I was following my orders. Yet, no more. I am sure there is an antidote somewhere, but I would advise a bit of a subterfuge on that. We can't let Czerka think that I willingly surrendered. So….cuff me up, Jedi and….make it look like we are not working willingly together."

I nodded. "I see...well let's get to work on that, Jordo."

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

My father was wounded. He growled at me and attacked me with a passion with a melee blade from one of the Czerka guards that had had their arms torn off. It was true what Wrrljiykam had said, slavery had made my father go mad.

We had passed out in the cell from gas Czerka had pumped in but some time later we both revived and I stood looking at the old wook.

"Zaalbar..."

I flinched, for my father to call me by my name meant that he had been considered madclaw as well.

I moaned. "Father….I am here."

He groaned. "Zaalbar, forgive me. Tradition dictated I listen and believe the elder son, your brother. I did not wish to believe that his treachery was true."

He opened his arms and embraced me. "You are madclaw no longer, Zaalbar. Together we will go to Kashyyyk and overcome your brother and his treachery with Czerka."

My eyes went wide, Juhani had been right. My father had given me back my honor and my respect.

I barked. "But father, I will still be madclaw on Kashyyyk."

"You maybe madclaw there but in my eyes you are no longer madclaw to me. My son has returned to me and will be the future chieftain of Rwookrrorro,"

"Father I cannot."

"Why not?"

"I have sworn a life debt to the Jedi padawan Phoenix Star."

My father looked at me and was quiet and then spoke. "A life debt….my son even as a madclaw….you followed the ways and traditions of our people. I understand. You have some time to think about this, Zaalbar and we must challenge your brother. But I am proud of you, son. Come let us leave this place of slavery and talk with your Phoenix Star regarding your future."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

" _Malak….we are close."_

" _Master, why must we deal with these contemptible primitives?"_

 _Revan stated firmly, "Primitives have their uses, apprentice. They undoubtedly have knowledge regarding the Star Maps. The Sand People are an old race, they've been here for a long time. They would have knowledge regarding the Builders and their ruins."_

" _Bah...we should kill them, rather than waste such meaningless time with them. The Builders stated they had their slaves killed back on Dantooine."_

" _If you kill every slave, apprentice….then who will serve us? The dead? Our Empire must be served by the living. The Force requires the living not the dead, apprentice."_

" _You sound like the damn Jedi, Master."_

" _Their philosophies are not without merit….apprentice. The Jedi maybe flawed but even flawed philosophies contain kernels of truth, wisdom, and knowledge."_

" _I refuse to submit to the Sand People."_

" _Fine….apprentice….then I'll continue on my own. Go back...to Anchorhead and wait for me…. but…."_

 _Revan raised his hands and the Force lighting rained down upon Malak. "This is for refusing to learn….denying knowledge."_

 _Malak suddenly stood despite the pain and rose from the ground and glared at Revan, a look of defiance in his eyes. He ignited his lightsaber._

 _Revan glared at Malak. "You dare challenge me….come apprentice….I will show you who is Master and you will learn your place, you are my slave….my apprentice. You are nothing more than a common Coruscanti street rat. I should have not have let the Jedi show mercy on you as a child. You were a thief….stealing food from the Jedi. I gave you my food….I convinced the Jedi you should be trained. I let you become my friend. You are nothing. You owe everything to me, Malak. Once a thief, ALWAYS a thief. Now you seek to steal my position. THIEF…..USURPER!"_

 _Revan ignited his Lightsaber and the Force swirled around the two Sith Lords._

 _The two Sith Lords fought. Lightsabers clashed hard as they fought around the dunes of the desert of Tatooine._

" _If I am a thief….Revan….what kind of Sith are you? Making such as I your apprentice?"_

" _I am Revan Ravenheart! My blood ties me close to Oron Kira, the mighty Beast Lord and King of Onderon. My blood is noble. You are beneath me, Malak, you have no such heritage. Your position is nothing more than a servant and a slave! You are NO equal to me, even among the Sith. Your mother was a whore, and your father was some unknown Republic soldier, or…."_

 _Revan suddenly paused then laughed. "One of the Jedi who couldn't control their passions and….slept with your mother. Yes….it makes sense why Master Rishan-Kai…..wanted to make you his padawan and why he insisted upon it so strongly. Your father was a hypocrite. A Jedi who couldn't control their passions….."_

 _Malak growled and attacked Revan with a fury. Revan faked a yawn. "I could fight you all day, apprentice….but did Master Rishan-Kai admit that he was your father?"_

 _Malak hissed. "Yes….I am Malak Rishan or as Master Rishan would state, I am Rishan-Malak."_

" _You are nothing….you are my apprentice. You serve me….now learn your place….slave!"_

 _Revan's blade suddenly slashed violently against Malak's jaw, but it was a very clean and precise cut severing the jaw neatly away. Malak dropped to the ground in pain._

 _Revan then looked over his handy work and then he suddenly laughed in mirthful sadistic pleasure. "Perhaps next time you will learn not to bite off more than you can chew!"_

 _The Sith Lord's laughter eased and then Revan said firmly, "Out of my sight...worm….you have failed, usurper. At least your annoying voice….won't irritate me for now. Perhaps the silence of no mouth to speak with will teach you the obedience you lack, slave!"_

 _Revan turned away from Malak._

 _Malak rose from the desert ground his blade still in hand, Revan turned. "Give it up apprentice….or do you wish to lose more than your jaw? Go…."_

 _Malak retreated._

 _Revan walked and neared the Sand People's encampment. His back turned, and he slowly removed his mask…._

Statement: Master…master…

I was half conscious, half unconscious. I felt sticky, the blood of the dead Sand People dried quickly on me. Revan's sadistic laugh from the vision echoing in my head. Frack, was Revan's humor really that morbid? It made me feel sick to my stomach and suddenly I vomited and I now lay in a pool of my own vomit. Ugh! I had joked with Carth about Malak biting off more than he could chew but seeing the very vision of how it happened. I felt sickened beyond belief.

I groaned, my body felt weak and drained. I seriously needed to be careful, I think I tapped into my own life force in using the Force. In theory, the Force was limitless but...my connection and my body felt burnt out like a light fixture had popped.

 _Drain the life from the twi'lek….he will restore your energy…._

Mission's brother!? Fracking no, Revan! I am a Jedi not some fracking vampric Sith.

 _You were….a Jedi. You are a heretic, but then you always knew this._

Shut up, Revan. I want no part of you.

Revan laughed. _That can't be avoided, Phoenix. I am a part of you, like it or not!_

"HK…."

Query: Master, shall I kill the twi'lek?

I groaned. "No…keep him from leaving or….well we need to get out of here….he needs to see his sister, Mission. Yet...I am too weak….get help HK….please…."

I heard Griff's voice. "Mish …..she's alive! I thought…"

Darkness flooded me and I welcomed it for I felt dead inside as I passed out into oblivion.

I heard weeping.:: _Tila? Oh Tila, What have I done?::_

* * *

 **A/N:** Happy 4th of July to all the American readers out there. Anyway this took some time to write. I am mostly happy with it. I felt kind of bogged down with the wookiee rescue but I feel mostly satisfied with it. This chapter I felt was the hardest to write for me, it did not come easy to me. So listened to my favorite songs, read other people's stories, and played a bit of the KOTOR I game to try and get my brain started. Luckily Jordo appeared on Kashyyyk while I was playing and I decided….perfect timing to get him in the story. Plus really have to love mods, which is funny because my Revan in game is being such a player. She's flirting with Bastila, asking Carth for a kiss for his apology and asking Juhani if she is hitting on her. She really is a bad Jedi. Lmao….

Anyway title for this chapter is inspired by the song from Linkin Park: What I've Done.


	53. 52:Tatooine:My Ghosts are Gaining on Me

**Chapter 52: Tatooine: My Ghosts Are Gaining On Me….**

 **~Kreia~**

Perhaps the droid found me or I found the droid. It really did not matter, it had been sent out to find help and it found me. I could feel her, my padawan. Yet, she felt different. I had heard what the Jedi had done to her. They had ruined her. My anger was at full measure. I had been cast out from the Order. They blamed and sentenced me for the transgressions of my student. I spent the time wandering the galaxy, the exile's path. I chose Tatooine as a place to center myself and to follow the path of my padawan.

I hated the droid, damn machines! Why did Revan spend so much time with them? Perhaps she inwardly distrusted others and relied on the company of droids. They were loyal to their masters and did not betray them, unlike Revan's apprentice. The droid led me to the Sand People's camp and I entered in. Ahh….the scent of slaughter and blood was strong here. The corpses of the Sand People were cut with a lightsaber blade and burned with electricity. There was no doubt whose handiwork this was.

As I drew closer to Revan's side, I found her unconscious in blood and vomit. I chuckled lightly; what an amusing way to find one's old student! She was incredibly vulnerable at this moment in time. The twi'lek looked at me and I said firmly calling on the Force, "Your companions are in Anchorhead, I saw them leave this encampment. You should join them. Once you leave you will forget me."

The twi'lek was susceptible to Force compulsion nodded and left. The droid barked out at me, Cautionary: Harm the master in anyway...and I shall blast you."

I raised my hand and using the Force I overloaded the droids circuity and the droid cried out, Warning: Systems failing master….

The droid fell to the ground deactivated. Finally. Annoying machine. I sighed and gently stroked the hair of my padawan. Revan, as a young child, had been assigned to me. She had been in my guidance and care first as an apprentice and then as a padawan, We had a connection of student and master. It was a rarity to be appointed to a student at such a young age Yet, I had convinced the council that I wished such an arrangement and at the time they had agreed to it. I had been drawn to Revan. I had felt her power, her potential, her destiny. She was such a remarkable student. Perhaps I was too attached to her, and being attached that deeply was a weakness. Yet, she was the only student that I felt strongly attached to, I felt like a mother to her. She was my greatest pupil. Why did the Jedi blame me for her fall? She had told me at one point in her training that I had taught her all I could and went to other masters to learn. Weren't their teachings just as bad? Why didn't they blame that fool Zhar? He trained her as well as Vandar, Vrook….the fools. No, it was blame me, sentence me.

Revan opened her eyes, as she revived and she groaned. "HK…..HK…."

"Your droid tried to attack me. I had to deactivate it."

She licked her lips. "That had to be interesting….I seriously doubt HK would have liked that."

"The machine did not….it will be fine. I am sure you can repair it. It requested my assistance for you and I am here."

She slowly tried to gather herself up but she struggled.

"Take it easy, padawan….ummm,,,"

"My name is Phoenix…..Phoenix Star."

I sighed. So that was the name they had given my student. It made me angry and sad all in the same breath. I debated whether or not to reveal to my student her true identity and then decided it did not serve me or the Force to tell her the truth. She had a destiny to fulfill as Phoenix Star, perhaps when the time was right I would acknowledge her as my padawan and declare her as Revan. However, she needed to prove that she was worthy of who she was. At the moment she had not proven herself worthy of her true heritage. So right now I would act like a stranger around her.

She paused. "You called me padawan….are you? Are you a Jedi?"

"I once clung to such a title, child. Yet….the title Jedi does me very little justice anymore."

She looked at me and she said softly, "You seem oddly familiar to me, there is something….I feel like I should….I can't explain it….I feel comfortable in your presence….yet I...I don't recall meeting you before. You're Echani, aren't you?" She paused and then coughed a bit of a laugh. "No offense….but I haven't exactly have had much luck with Echani lately. Last Echani I met, wanted to drag me back to Malak and Admiral Karath. I sincerely hope you don't have similar designs. I am not really in a position to fight you."

Revan couldn't hide from her past or her history forever. It had seemed that Revan's apprentice and the Sith Admiral had aims on capturing her. I shook my head. "I have no desires to fight you, padawan and if I did...I would have attacked you much sooner."

She said nothing.

The thought she felt comfortable in my presence made me wonder, could it be that she still had traces of her old memory? Perhaps that bond we had as master and padawan still vaguely remained. Yes, I felt the traces of it. It was broken but there were vestiges of it left, it was like the threads of broken cords. I could feel them fragmented but still around. "I suppose in your travels you have meet many, many people, Padawan. Faces and those you meet slowly all blend together till they blur."

She nodded. "I suppose." She tried to rise and she fell over. "I feel….dizzy, weak..."

"Ahh….you have burned some of your life force. You will recover, in time. Come with me, padawan….you need to rest, to eat, and you may wish to find some better clothing to wear, as well as attempt to clean up. I have shelter."

She nodded. I extended a hand to Revan and she took it and leaned on me. "You claim you're not a Jedi….you're not a Sith….are you? Are you….trying to convert me?" She suddenly laughed. "If you are this would be the first time a Sith sought to help me….well that's not true….there was that damn Echani….and he…."

I laughed and interrupted her comment. "Jedi, Sith….what is this preoccupation with such titles? You would do wise padawan to throw such titles and philosophies into a trash compactor. They are worthless, they make everything into absolutes. Think padawan….think or would you prefer I knock some sense in your worthless head?"

She frowned. "You wouldn't try and….beat me would you? Or use Force lighting on me would you?"

I raised an eyebrow, she remembered something I had done to her or perhaps something she had done.

"Beat you? Use Force Lighting….well that would depend on the situation, padawan."

She looked contemplative for a moment. "You're Revan's Master aren't you? You're Master Kae."

"What assumption are you basing that on?"

"A wild guess….based on….my own personal observations."

I mused quietly. Memories. She remembered something.

"I see….Master Kae is dead though…. she went to war with Revan and died during the war. As for Kreia….well….that is a name I know only too well."

Revan furrowed her brow. "No matter what you call yourself. You are Revan's master...well...it seems the dreams I have of Revan….well he….had a habit of beating lessons into his apprentice."

I suddenly laughed, was that what the Jedi had told her that her memories were visions and dreams? I shook my head. "I am not the only Master who believes in physical discipline to reinforce lessons, padawan. I am just the only one among the Jedi who believed that such ways were considered a valid way to reinforce all the lessons I taught. Revan learned that pain was something not to be feared but to be overcome. True, I was a bit unorthodox, but….it served Revan well. She learned her lessons well from me. More often than not…she learned quickly enough that such discipline was not needed. Others not so much."

Revan's jaw dropped. "But I was told Revan was a man…."

"Don't be absurd….that was what Revan wanted everyone to believe. She had her reasons but the Jedi were so ashamed of her, they disavowed her and her memory."

"You mean the Jedi let Revan claim that she was a man. For the Force why?"

"Who can understand the minds of the Jedi, they are just as obscure as the Sith at times. Perhaps it was easier for the Jedi to accept Revan as a woman when she was a Jedi, and as a man when she was a Sith. Perhaps this division of her past made it easier….for them to comprehend her fall or to deny her existence completely."

Revan seemed troubled over the information that I had given her. She wanted to say more to me but she looked troubled and concerned. She muttered something darkly under her breath about being lied to once more by those she care for.

I said nothing. Revan needed to piece together the puzzles of her own existence slowly on her own. I would not be a proper master if I gave her the truth all at once. I only hoped she figured it out on her own, rather than have her enemies give it to her. Such a reveal of knowledge could mentally and physically scar her. Yet, I knew my student, she was resilient, she would draw her strength from the Force and become stronger from such things occurred.

Revan looked at me. "What are you doing here on Tatooine?"

"I am tracing the footsteps of my student… Revan. Are you not doing the same?"

She paused. "Yes….I suppose I am. We should help each other, Master…Kreia."

I sighed. "I would but I would prefer to work with just you and just you alone, child. I dislike working with others. You did not come alone. If you come to see me again, child. I would rather it be you and you alone. No others."

I hated that damn padawan, Bastila Shan, she was a tool of the Jedi Council. She had played a part in warping my poor student's mind. It was bad enough talking to Revan and for her not even to realize who I was to her or who she was. However, what really gained my ire was that my padawan had encumbered herself with Bastila. Yet, I had heard that it wasn't really my student's fault. She would have been dead if it hadn't been for Bastila. No….I couldn't tie myself up fully with Revan, at least not at the moment.

I motioned around the room. "What business did you have with the Sand People? And what pray tell did they do to deserve your ire?"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I got the impression that this old woman was hiding something from me. What that was I was not sure. She did not seem completely truthful with me. In fact she was downright slippery and seemed illusive in spirit. She reminded me of the spirit of Revan that possessed me. He….no….as I had found out, Revan, was a she, and she had made a habit at first to be just as illusive within my mind. It made sense that this woman was Revan's master. Yet I was too tired and weak to determine whether or not this woman in Jedi robes was a Jedi or a Sith. Maybe she was neither. I sighed, talking with her took a lot of energy out of me. I needed rest. Yet, I couldn't help but talk to her. I was convinced she had knowledge that would help me. I leaned on her, for an old woman she seemed rather strong.

" _What business did you have with the Sand People? And what pray-tell did they do to deserve your ire?"_

"They hurt someone I love and care for. I acted in her behalf. She doesn't have the strength of will like I do."

Kreia suddenly laughed. "Strength of will! ….and yet you've worn yourself out, padawan. If I was Malak or an enemy of yours I could have killed you or captured you."

I grunted acknowledging the truth of her words. "Yea and she lied to me...about...well about Revan being a man."

Kreia nodded. "You need to be much more mindful of those you travel with and their agendas."

"Agendas….since when does….Bastila have an agenda? I love her….and she loves me."

Kreia shook her head. "Really padawan! Everyone has an agenda, particularly her! But you should ask her about that on your own...and see. Besides what has love gotten you? You slaughtered the Sand People and did it all on a whim of passion! Do you honestly think she will reciprocate such a thing for you?"

"I don't want my acts reciprocated Master Kreia! I never intended my actions to be reciprocated. I intended it as an act of sacrifice. A true sacrifice, never asks to be reciprocated, I did it out of necessity. Any sacrifice may cause pain, but a Jedi's life is sacrifice. My own life, my own position means nothing to me. Bastila's suffering, that's what matters to me. I may have taken a misstep as a Jedi. I may have taken a step towards a fall but I can cope much better than she from a fall. My actions are noble because I am stronger than she is. She wanted to kill the Sand People. I couldn't allow that, she can't cope from the morality of such actions. I can. As for whatever agenda….she has….well you obviously have an agenda as well. Apparently you are trying to pit me against my friend and friends...I don't know what your ploy is, Master Kreia….but….stop it."

My outburst suddenly made me feel dizzy, I suddenly plopped to the ground. The Tatooine heat was not helping me either.

Kreia calmly managed to pick me up, she shook her head and said,"I see, padawan…and you are right to assume that I too have an agenda. However, how do you know my agenda is not in your best interests rather than the agenda of Bastila Shan? You would be mindful to guard your emotions from her rather than let some sort of connection to her drive you. However, perhaps I underestimate you and your…unique situation. But I grow weary of this conversation, it's apparent you know everything and I know nothing. Typical of the arrogance of Jedi these days. I would expect better from you, child. Come….you need to rest. I can feel your exhaustion."

"Alright...hold on..."

I hobbled wearily but I recovered the holocron from Bastila's father and then on a whim I walked into another room and picked up the chieftain's gaffi and placed it in my pack, a strange trophy of my combat against the Sand People.

* * *

 **~Kreia~**

In many respects Revan was not gone. Her spirit, her ideals were still very much within her. Perhaps I was wrong about her. Yet, her mind was still an obvious muddle. She still believed herself to be….someone called Phoenix Star. She obviously had no idea what the Jedi had done to her. I refused to call her that. I would call her padawan or child, I refused to dirty my tongue on that false name.

The conversation we had took a lot out of her. Her features had gone pale. She looked a bit sick. We loaded up her deactivated droid and I put her on one of the Sand People's banthas. She fell asleep on the animal. She slept completely oblivious. I sighed as I lead the bantha to the shelter I had taken refuge in. It had been ages since I had seen my first and my greatest student. I had followed her to war. I knew her path and yet, I had abandoned her when she truly needed me. I should not have gone back to the Jedi, after the war. I should have followed Revan to the further reaches of the rim. Perhaps I would have understood why she had chosen to become a Sith. The Jedi seemed to think I was to blame. Yet, I knew my student, she was perfectly capable of choosing her own actions with or without my advice. True, she came to me asking how to best leave the Jedi during the Mandalorian wars….

" _Master Kae. I know I am not the first Jedi to rebel against the Order. But it's obvious the Jedi have grown blind to the fact of suffering in the rim. Tell me, you are the archivist for the Order. How did others leave? Is there any risk? Will they exile me for my actions?"_

 _I looked at my old student. "The risk is yours, Revan. Going against the will of the Council and the Order, is a quick path to exile. But would you rather stay a Jedi Knight or let the rim burn in the fires of war?"_

 _Revan sighed. "The answer is obvious to me, Master Kae. A Jedi's life is sacrifice. My own life, my own position means nothing to me. The suffering of others along the rim, that's what matters to me. I can no longer sit here on Coruscant or at the Enclave on Dantooine while others die."_

" _Then you must be prepared for the consequences, Revan. You will lose all respect, honor, and position within the Order. You will be considered a renegade Jedi. The Jedi will turn their backs on you. There will be many who will not understand you or your path. However, I suspect that the Republic will welcome you with open arms."_

" _I honestly don't care how the Jedi view me or the Republic either. I just know….I believe my choice is the right one. The Mandalorians are the greatest risk to the Republic since….well since Exar Kun. I am not afraid of my choices. I will take up the mantle of war….I will burn with my own light….the light of the Force. Since the Order lacks the consc_ _ience_ _to act…. I will. I will sweep down….like fire upon the rim. I will be a firebird…. I will burn our enemies to ashes."_

" _I believe you will be successful in your crusade, Revan."_

 _She smiled softly and then knelt before me. "Master Kae….I would be honored if you would join me in my crusade. Not as my master but as my friend."_

 _I put a hand on my student's shoulder. "I accept your call to war, Revan. And I always considered you a friend….Revan. I may have been hard on you as a student….and hard on you as a child, but...you have learned my lessons well and you know that being a Jedi is more than just following the words of the Code. It requires so much more and those words are empty if it means sitting here doing nothing."_

I looked at Revan as we arrived at my shelter. She slept away as though she was dead. Considering the fact that she had burned her own Life Force away it was a wonder she wasn't dead. I nudged her a bit. She groaned a bit. "Carth….just five more minutes…."

I rolled my eyes. Seriously, how many lovers did Revan have? When I knew Revan there was only Liam Mandrell. Those two were like fire with each other. It made sense though that those two would be close, as they were both Onderonian. I tried to discourage their relationship. I was convinced that their relationship was a relationship to piss off Malak. Malak continued to try and woo Revan but Revan kept rejecting him. It was obvious that Revan was not interested in her friend, Malak. She would try and be nice to Malak and say she wasn't interested but the Coruscanti Jedi Knight refused to take no for an answer. Finally, Liam drew up his lightsaber and told Malak to back off that Revan was his. Revan finally stood between the both of them and said that it was stupid to fight over her. She said she was not a prize to be won and stormed off. Both hormone driven men apologized and tried to avoid Revan. Yet, eventually Revan would return and twist Liam around her finger and those two would be quietly found in the Room of Thousand Fountains doing Force knows what. Then Malak would find out and….it would begin all over again.

I wondered what romantic entanglements Revan was in now. I knew she was involved with Bastila...but now she was apparently involved with Carth Onasi. Revan seriously needed to stop getting involved with everyone she developed feelings and friendships with.

I coughed. "I am not Carth….Padawan….."

Revan opened her eyes and turned beet red. "Err….yea….obviously…..plus Carth is much easier on the eyes than you."

I sighed, she hadn't changed one bit. She still had a rather perverse sense of humor at times. "I suspect you wish a bath first. Take it easy on the water. It's a difficult commodity out here."

"A bath….you mean like in a tub?"

I nodded. "Yes….the foul water will then be used to water crops. Nothing is wasted in the desert. I have some robes…."

She manged to get off the bantha and she entered my shelter. I quietly unloaded her droid and propped the thing in a corner. I wouldn't have even bothered with the damn thing, except apparently Revan seemed attached to the damn thing and would have been upset if Jawas ran off with it.

I laid out some robes for Revan some were Jedi robes, others were Dark Jedi robes. She frowned as she fingered the Dark Jedi robes "Where did you get these?"

"Ahh those….would you believe that Malak and those who serve him tried to recruit me?"

"I would say….Malak would be hard up trying to recruit an old fossil like you."

I chuckled lightly. "Old fossil, indeed. In my day, we were polite to elders. But it matters little. Malak knew I was Revan's teacher. His ire did not stop at….killing his master. He sought to kill me because I was associated with his master. I fought back against his slaves. The robes are what remains of them. He has stopped hunting me for the moment. You and your "friend" Bastila is what preoccupies his mind at present."

She grunted, "Yea….no kidding. At least there are a few less Dark Jedi in the galaxy because of you. I better take that bath. I think I can't stomach my own stench…."

"This way, padawan..." I pointed her to a room and she retreated to the room and I heard her sloshing around.

I sighed as I prepared a simple meal for her and myself. This shelter use to belong to a moisture farmer and his family but the Sand People had killed them. I had buried them and then took over the homestead and made it my shelter. It felt odd being back in the presence of my old student. It felt like old times and yet...it felt like I was in the presence of an absolute stranger. Revan seemed in so many ways similar and yet so very different.

Revan finally came out from her bath. She wore one of the Dark Jedi robes and I raised an eyebrow.

"Any particular reason why you are wearing those robes, padawan?"

She chuckled. "Yea, to peeve off Bastila. She's probably going to hit the roof when I come back wearing the robes of one of Malak's Dark Jedi."

Even that brand of humor struck me as something Revan would have done. "You should probably eat and then res..."

"Uhh no offense, Master Kreia...but I probably should get back to my friends. Knowing them they are probably worried and concerned about me. I can rest on the Ebon Hawk. But I'll eat something….the food dispenser on the Hawk leaves a lot to be desired."

"As you wish, child. Again….if you ever come on your own….without your friends. Please seek me out."

She nodded and then we sat down quietly as we ate a simple meal of bread and a simple porridge.

* * *

A/N: And I decided to bring in Kreia into this chapter because I wanted it to be someone else saving Phoenix/Revan's skin aside from it being the standard rescue from Carth, Bastila, etc because frankly having the standard rescue or help come from them has already happened. Besides, I wanted to add some KOTOR 2 elements so the two games sort of blend together. Besides it gives a unique perspective to have some background from someone who truly knew Revan and her past.

Title comes from Evanescence and their song, All The I am Living from. I guess using song titles is coming from Kosiah. Please read their fics. They are awesome. Also some please read Ether's fic, they are almost done with their Star Forge fic….but inspiration always comes when I read other people's fics so I will promote others fics as worthy reading material. :)


	54. Chapter 53: Tatooine:This Cross We Bare

****Chapter 53: Tatooine: This Cross We Bare...****

 ** **~Carth~****

"Carth we need to go back for Nix!"

I sighed. "We will Mission, but we need to get Bastila back to the Hawk."

"Look you old geezer, I saw how Nix was in the Sand People's camp; she's not acting right."

"I know… Mission. She had this look in her eyes. It scared me. I've never seen...no….I shouldn't say that. I've seen it before, it was on Taris, we were cornered by a Sith soldier. She went berserk on the guy. She….she mutilated the guy's body. I thought….well I thought...well it's the Sith. They aren't exactly known to bring out the best in people. "

Mission nodded. "Are you worried that Nix might...well y'know….go dark on us?"

I pondered over what Mission stated. "I don't know...Mission. I think Phoenix is being pulled in many different directions. Sometimes I think I know her and other times I don't. I don't know who she is….not right now. Maybe the Jedi….during her training. I don't know, I don't want to jump to random conclusions, but I can't help but think something happened to her back on Dantooine or maybe….well maybe something further back considering the fact that she acted like this once on Taris. Let's get out of here and back to Anchorhead and to the Hawk. I have no desire to be attacked by Sand People on our way back."

Mission sighed and looked at me as if she shared the same thoughts and fears I did.

We walked back to the city and made it back to the Hawk. I laid Bastila on the bed in the med-lab. Mission looked at Bastila and said. "Carth….I need to find my brother. I know you have got to play nurse, but...my brother he's gonna either come back to the city or….I hope Nix doesn't do anything rash. I've got to find out, Carth. I am a big girl, y'know. So don't worry about me 'kay."

I nodded, normally I would have told Mission to stay put. I didn't like the way the streetwise Mission just decided to take off like that. Yet, I was distracted by Bastila being clunked on the head and Phoenix's behavior. Mission bolted before I could say otherwise. Meanwhile I managed to go through the computer and looked up treatments for concussions. There really wasn't much there on treatment. All the database gave me was treat by giving the patient kolto and tell them to rest a few days. Fat chance that was going to happen, course Bastila was a Jedi, she'd recover quickly enough. I injected the kolto into her and waited….

 ** **~0o0~****

Hours passed as I kept a firm tab on Bastila. Unconsciousness was replaced with sleep or perhaps Jedi healing. I know she shifted around uneasily in what looked like sleep or perhaps a trance of some sort. I debated on going back for Phoenix when Bastila suddenly gasped and woke up. "Take it easy, Bastila. Phoenix gave you quite a bump on the head."

She scowled at me and then sighed. "It's all my fault…."

"What?"

"Phoenix….she's tainted."

"What the hell do you mean by that, Bastila?"

"She's touched the Dark Side, Carth."

"So...should we be….worried? What the frack do you want us to do, Bastila?"

"I don't know."

"So the Dark Side….is it like being poisoned….or drugged or something? I am not a Jedi, Bastila. Help me out here."

* * *

 ** **~Bastila~****

 _"_ _ _So__ _ _the__ _ _Dark Side….is it like being poisoned….or drugged or something? I am not a Jedi, Bastila. Help me out here."__

I felt guilty, I had led Revan to this. She was trying to keep the Dark Side from me and in doing so she had opened up the Dark Side within herself.

"It's hard to explain, Carth. It's seductive….once you open yourself up to that sort of power. It's hard to let it go. For most Force sensitives, it begs one to surrender to it, to release all its terrible power… and it becomes harder and harder to resist. And once someone stop resisting, it is too late. It twists them up inside and… and turns them into a mockery of everything they once stood for."

Carth paled. "You mean that power changes someone."

I nodded. "It does...one can't wield that type of power without….being tempted to use it again and again. Plus it takes...anger, hate, and all sorts of negative emotions to use it. The Dark Side feeds on these things."

"You're bonded to her, so….what sort of emotions was Phoenix acting on when she opened herself up to that sort of power."

I gulped. "Me. She felt my struggle against my mother and the pain and anger at losing my father. I am sorry to say, I wanted to kill the Sand People. I almost surrendered to my own passions. She….knocked me out before I….reacted. It's our bond I am afraid. I am just as guilty for this….as…."

"Well that's normal, Bastila. I wanted, no….I still want to kill Saul….he betrayed my planet. My wife and son died because of him. It's perfectly normal to want justice and revenge, Bastila."

I shook my head. "Surrendering to such emotions for a Jedi is wrong….well... one only needs to look at Revan and Malak to see the after affects of surrendering to such emotions and the Dark Side of the Force, Carth. Millions dead and far more suffering. What sort of person would I or Phoenix become to perform such deeds gladly?"

Carth sighed. "I don't know…."

"Neither do I, Carth. And I hope I never do."

Carth nodded. "So what do you suggest we do about this….taint, Bastila?"

I paused in thought. "I am not sure, other than having a good long talk with her about the consequences of her actions. If we had the time, we'd head right back to Dantooine and Phoenix would spend time meditating on her actions, but sadly we don't with Malak hunting us both."

"That's the thing I've been wondering about, Bastila. Why send Phoenix on this mission? Why did the Council want this?"

"As we've both said, we have a bond with each other. We dream of Revan and Malak, Carth. No other Jedi has had that experience, Carth."

"But why the dreams, Bastila?"

"As I told Phoenix, the Force works as it will, Carth. We were destined to dream of them."

"That seems oddly convenient, Bastila."

"For Jedi there is no convenience. There is only the Force and it works as it will."

"I suppose next you'll say the Force has a path for me."

"It does, Carth. You have a destiny as well. I am not sure what it is yet, but the Force works its will on all, even you."

Carth muttered bitterly, "I don't like that idea and….you make it sound like all Jedi are nothing more than a bunch of ticking time bombs."

"In many respects, that analogy is true, Carth. It takes many years of study and discipline before using the Force can even be considered safe."

Carth looked at me. "Maybe I can talk to her Bastila. I love her, I don't want to lose her to some sort of Dark life energy field."

I looked thoughtful. "Yes, maybe you can keep her from falling. Seeing how she fawns all over you. I doubt she'll listen to me."

We may have been close, even closeted lovers, but I knew Phoenix and every time we talked about the tenants of the Order or even the Dark Side, she'd roll her eyes and act like she wasn't afraid of the Dark Side. Of course, after what happened with the Sand People she might change her mind. Yet, she was incredibly stubborn and headstrong. She was too much….like….well too much like her old self; Revan. She seemed to carry some resoluteness to her that seemed to think she was not vulnerable to the effects of the Dark Side.

Currently, Phoenix seemed to skirt the borders of light and dark. She seemed to use the Force without much thought of its consequences. However, wasn't that what Revan did when she went off to war? She went off to war thinking only of the immediate concerns of the moment, the pain and suffering of others. She also was concerned about the state of the Republic and the Mandalorian threat. In this philosophy she managed to convince Malak, Liam Mandrell, Akume Dreamsong, Veranda the Fosh, Rohan Skydancer, Miyaep Vassa, and even Master Arren Kae, her own master, plus many, many others.

In the end Revan had managed to call away seventy Jedi. Most of those Jedi, including Revan, were the pride of the Order. They were considered the future of the Order. After the war with Exar Kun, they were considered a bright light and the hope of the Order. Their strength was intended to rebuild the Order. They were meant to bring a new vitality after what happened with Exar Kun. Sadly most of the seventy ended up either killed or corrupted. Only two Jedi came back to the Order to face judgment: Liam Mandrell and Akume Dreamsong.

Liam went off to parts unknown, his spirit and connection to the Force broken. Liam had been the stronger of the pair. He accepted his exile and walked off with a heavy broken soul. His wound in the Force blinded him to the Dark Side. As for Akume, she had been a healer and a Force balladeer. She seemed an odd one to follow Revan and Malak. She followed them in the intent of healing, easing the pain of those afflicted in war. Plus she wished to sing the tales of the Jedi under Revan. Sadder still was the devastation of Malachor V, that horrible final battle had broken the sanity of the minstrel and healer. With the judgment of the council, what little remained of Akume's sanity broke.

Akume was heart broken and devastated by the news of her exile. The masters all thought she would surrender her lightsaber. However, her only surrender ended up with the blade placed near her heart in an intent to kill herself. The sway of the Dark Side fully blossoming within her that she wished death over life itself. She was saved by her own master, Master Vash, who took it upon herself to see the poor distraught Jedi was disarmed of her lightsaber. Master Vash called upon the Force and wrenched the blade quickly away from her. Akume was then locked away in a medical facility in the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. Perhaps one day, the poor woman's mind would recover. Currently, the poor woman sat in a sterile cell devoid of any possible weapons. She would rock back and forth in a stupor, singing over and over again a ballad she had composed about the dead on Malachor V. Such pain and anguish from the woman.

The Jedi kept most information about her quiet and top secret worried that Akume might have deeper connections to Revan and Malak. They tried to probe the woman's mind hoping beyond hope to gain information from Akume regarding Revan and Malak. The masters all thinking she might have answers but truly Akume had nothing of value regarding Revan or Malak. Akume had been a minor officer, a healer. She was not even considered a strong fighter or even considered of much value by the Republic or Revan and the Sith for that matter. She was simply a Jedi who believed in Revan's noble crusade and ended up just as much a casualty of the war as those who died. She was sadly an after effect of the Mandalorian Wars along with countless numbers of Jedi who had been killed or corrupted to the Dark Side. I had been assigned to tend to Akume a few times before my strike team had been sent to subdue Revan, the council felt that I needed to learn compassion for those who had followed Revan. They believed that helping the broken Jedi would teach me to have compassion for Revan. Such compassion in the end led me to spare Revan's life.

There was so much pain from the Dark Side. I looked at Carth. "We need to find Phoenix. I am having trouble locating her through our bond. It's a bit muddled. She's alive though. I would know if she was dead."

Carth nodded. "You know…." He paused a moment, "I think I would know if she was dead as well."

I had considered the fact that Carth was strongly connected somehow to Revan as well. She had become Carth's lover too and it was a connection I could not overlook. I felt slightly drawn to Carth and I wondered if that was me or Revan's connection with him. Force….I was in enough trouble having a relationship with Revan let alone let Revan's connection to Carth influence me as well.

I could see why Phoenix/Revan loved him. He had a good heart about him, he was kind, gentle and….well maybe Revan needed that. He seemed to have some pull over her that I just didn't have. Plus I could see our lover's connection was dangerous. It had pulled her to take revenge over my father's death. Perhaps...I needed to break off completely whatever relationship I had with her. It pained me, pained me a lot but...it was better this way. I only hoped that I could get Phoenix to agree with me.

* * *

 ** **~Phoenix~****

I slowly rode the bantha with HK back to Anchorhead. I didn't feel like repairing and activating the damn droid when I left Master Kreia's shelter. He seemed to feed my desire for bloodshed and combat. If I activated the damn thing, it would go on and on about how well done my slaughter of the Sand People was and that it was masterfully done. Just the thought of hearing that made me feel sick inside. Master Kreia had done me a favor shorting out the droid. Yea, I'd have to repair his wiring but I needed the time to think.

I sighed. I pondered over myself, what kind of person had I become since Dantooine and since Taris? Was my slaughter of the Sand People justified? I decided yes and no. The Sand People were a threat. But in many respects all they were doing was protecting their way of life. Bastila's father was sadly a casualty of a war the Sand People had with Czerka. I detested Czerka. They had allied themselves in no small part with the Sith. On the other hand, the Sand People would have attacked settlers regardless of Czerka. The Sand People simply refused to adapt to the fact that humans and other non-native species were not going away. My killing the Sand People clan would bring a small amount of peace to this area of Tatooine. Yet, how long would that peace last? Not long. My actions probably had destabilized the area. Sand People clans would fight among themselves to claim the area that I had cleared. They would fight and kill each other and the stronger clan would claim it and then resume attacks on settlers. In the end, my actions could not be justified. I had killed them simply because Bastila wanted revenge. Even Revan hadn't killed the Sand People. I sniffed and tried to hold back the tears. I had sunk lower than Revan.

Revan's laughter filled my head. __I saved them for you.__

I ignored Revan's sarcastic acerbic remark. Revan what did you learn from the Sand People?

 _ _Ahh so now you seek knowledge from me, rather than scorn me. Why should I tell you anything?__

Because….I found your master. Your first master.

Revan laughed. _Y_ _ _ou do realize I had several masters. All of them made me who I am. I find it amusing that you've also met and/or trained under the same masters, I've had. Isn't that odd….as well as a strange coincidence.__

What the frack are you hinting at, Revan?

 _ _Figure it out….Phoenix….if you're really that thick….I can't help you.__

I snorted. You didn't answer my question. What about the Sand People?

Revan sighed. __Very well__ _…._ _ _they weren't always cloth clad nomads. They had their own advanced culture, their own society. They were__ _slaves of_ _the Builders_ _._ _ _They__ __rebelled__ __and__ __the__ __Builders__ _turn the planet into glass. S_ _ _ome of them managed to escape the devastation. The glass eventually turned into sand. At least that's what they believe. The Sand People hate us because__ _t_ _he_ _ _Builders kidnapped them and we….look... well...we look oddly like them. Does that satisfy your questions? You'd have learn this on your own….if you hadn't killed them. You are absolutely unworthy….of the Jedi or the Sith for that matter.__

What the frack does that mean?

 _You're hardly a Jedi, Phoenix…..but you're not a Sith either. A Sith would find you pathetic and a Jedi would find you stewing in the Darkness. What are you Phoenix? Can you answer that?"_

I….I….don't know.

 _An honest answer. Perhaps the Jedi haven't mucked you up fully with their pathetic teachings._

What is it about the Jedi you hate, Revan?

Revan snorted. __They are fracking hypocrites, Phoenix. They sat in their pathetic ivory tower preaching justice, nobility, and honor. They claim that we should serve the Republic, serve others, serve the Force. What hypocrisy! They failed in that mission and they lied about their true purpose. The galaxy doesn't need anymore Jedi hypocrisy. They failed the galaxy and they failed me. They deserved my hate….my contempt. If they had been there….perhaps I would not have...__

You're talking about the Mandalorian wars aren't you?

 _ _More or less. I brought seventy brave Knights and Masters with me. They agreed with me. We wanted to show the galaxy the nobility of the Jedi. We wished to save the galaxy from the Mandalorians. We did it. But again….the Jedi saw us as renegades. We couldn't go back to the Order if we wanted. We had only one path.__

You accepted the Sith because the Jedi wouldn't accept you. But there was one that went back.

 _ _Two….but they were pathetic and broken. And the Jedi could have them. I….I accepted the Sith…__ Revan suddenly laughed. __I accepted nothing. I embraced that which gave me power. I reveled in the Darkness I was made to discover within me.__

I cringed. Made to discover? I remembered that the Masters had said something about Revan being corrupted beyond the rim. Yea, but it killed you. Your apprentice rose up with the same darkness within him.

 _ _Is what the Jedi told you? Remember Bastila and the Jedi lied to you about me being a man.__

Yea, but you started the lie.

 _ _A minor stipulation. They didn't have to embrace that lie, the hypocrites!__

I had finally made it to the gate of Achorhead. I dismounted the bantha and fiddled with HK's wiring. Hmm….it hadn't fully burned out. The wiring was top notch, HK's construction was really more resilient than I first thought. I just needed to reroute the wiring and….

HK suddenly jolted awake. Query: Where is that witch of a Jedi? Let me kill her master, please!

I rolled my eyes. "I was told you threatened her, HK. Do you want to end up in the trash heap? Keep it up, HK and I'll scrap you."

Objection: But Master! Am I not far too useful to be thrown aside in such a casual manner? Can I be faulted for my perfect artificial construction?

"Why not? I don't need a lippy droid."

Analysis: Reference: 'lippy'… argumentative, disputatious, contentious, quarrelsome. What?! I must object, master, this is untrue!

"Untrue? You've been lippy since I obtained you."

Explanation: It's my combative nature, master. I cannot help myself. I'll make it up to you… allow me to kill something in your honor!

I sighed and shook my head. "You do realize that you're pretty bloodthirsty for a droid, don't you?"

Answer: Even a droid has to be allowed a little fun once in a while, master.

"If you think killing is fun….remind me to work on something to correct that behavior."

Objection: But Master….can I help my nature!?

I growled at the droid. "What am I going to do with you HK?

Answer: Obviously you must utilize me to my full potential, master.

I groaned. "Just stop talking. I give up!"

Observation: Organics have no sense of persistence.

"What was that?"

Err… ignore that, master. Obeying original command. Signing off.

I sighed as I entered Anchorhead. Most of the sentients were giving me a wide berth. I scratched my head wondering why. I then suddenly realized why, I am wearing the clothing of a Dark Jedi. Of course they are going to give me a wide berth. Hah! Maybe wearing these robes had a better purpose than I realized. I had no desire to be fawned over like I had been on Dantooine. Jedi this and Jedi that….if you please Master Jedi. The sentients feared me even though I was no Dark Jedi.

However, a twi'lek seemed to approach me with some trepidation. "Forgive me for the intrusion, human. My name is Senni Vek. I believe you dropped this datapad and I wish to return it to you."

I frowned. "What the frack….I didn't drop any datapad!"

"Yes, I believe you did, human. Here take it."

I growled at him, "I'll beat you to death with that datapad if you keep insisting that it's mine."

HK spoke, Statement: That's telling him master, shall I blast him for you?

I shook my head negatively. "No….not yet, HK."

The twi'lek paled but said with a bit of fear in his voice, "No….perhaps it's not yours, but I still wish for you to have it, human."

He placed it in my hand and then bolted. I shook my head as I looked at it: _The Genoharadan say to see Hulas on Manaan. Come alone or not at all._

Geno….what?

 _Assassins. They like to keep a tidy galaxy, as do I._

What the frack...do assassins want with me, Revan?

 _Hmm….hard to say, Phoenix. I wouldn't trust them. They are known to stab each other in the back._

Wonderful. Back stabbers. I've had enough of that.

 _Me too, Phoenix. Me too._

I snorted. Yea, must be nice to have so much in common with the fracking Dark Lord of the Sith.

Revan laughed in my head. _We have a lot more in common then you realize, Phoenix!_

Yea, you share my fracking body. I am still working on a way to get you out of it. You're a fracking pain, Revan!

 _Really….I'd say the same about you as well, Phoenix. The thought I share my existence with you makes me ill._

I suddenly laughed out loud and HK stated, Query: Master are you sure you do not need any psychological assistance? You've been acting a bit odd since we slaughtered the Sand People.

I shook my head. "No….just something amused me."

Statement: Well master, if whatever amused you needs to be killed. Allow me to kill them, please."

I sighed. "I wish….HK….I honestly wish….you could….and that's not very Jedi like at all. But I haven't exactly been acting very Jedi-ish at all. Anyway I need a drink."

Statement: Master, may I remind you….you stated and I quote….

HK then stated in my voice. Recitation: No more getting out of my head drunk. I've learned my lesson.

I shivered. "Sithspit, HK that's creepy as hell."

Statement: I apologize, master. I just thought you needed to remember what you stated.

"Yea...last time I ended up drunk I ended up dragged off by Calo Nord, so thanks for the reminder."

Gratification: You are most welcome, master.

I didn't feel like going back to the Hawk though. I had a feeling I was going to deal with Bastila and Carth berating me over my actions. So I went to the cantina. I told HK to go back to the Hawk as he wasn't allowed in the cantina. I ordered a fruit fizz, a non-alcoholic but fizzy drink. Frack, I am becoming like my mother. She loved those damn fizzy drinks. Speaking of mothers. I looked over and found Helena Shan nursing a cup of Corellian brandy. She saw me and came over to me. "Did you? Did you find Tian?"

I sighed. "Ms. Shan, your husband is dead."

She gasped and suddenly started to cry. Where the frack was Bastila? She needed to be here. I suddenly screamed through our bond.: _:BASTILA….GET THE FRACK HERE NOW…..YOUR MOTHER NEEDS YOU….::_

 _::Phoenix….you really shouldn't shout at me.::_

 _::Yea….but….she is your mother. And I just told her about your father's death.::_

Bastila sighed.: _:I am coming.::_

I put a hand on Helena's shoulder. "I am sorry. I know how you feel….believe me. I lost my father during the Mandalorian Wars. He, my mother, and my brother were brutally murdered by the Mandalorians. It hurts."

Helena looked at me. "I wish….I wish we never came to Tatooine."

Bastila entered the cantina. She took a look at me and paled slightly. I gave her a good-natured grin. She noticed my outfit.

She looked at her mother. "Mother….."

Helena looked at her daughter. "Tila..." She reached out to hug Bastila but Bastila moved away. I glared at Bastila.: _:Frack….Bastila….hug your damn mother.:_

 _:I cannot. It isn't proper for a Jedi to show this type of emotion.:_

 _:Do you realize that you seem cold and unfeeling?! That's not the way a Jedi should be. That's well... you might as well be a fracking Sith.:_

Bastila paused and contemplated my statement and then she opened her arms and embraced her mother.

I took the holocron from my pocket. I placed it in Bastila's hand.

Bastila looked at the holocron, a feeling of guilt on her face. "Mother….my first thought if the worst happened was….that I wanted this holocron and I shouldn't give it up to you. But…."

Helena sighed. "I was hard on you, dear. I wasn't a very good mother to you, I know that. Your father loved you so. He wanted you to be just like him... he wanted to take you on his hunts, but I said they were too dangerous. I always tried to keep him from the dangerous ones, but he would have none of it. It was a reckless life we led, always moving... I didn't want that for you."

Bastila eyes lit up as she looked at her mother. "So that's why you gave me to the Order?"

"What do your father and I have to show for all those years of hunting? Nothing. That was no life for anyone, especially not someone as gifted as you. Your father... he spent all his last years trying to pay for my treatments. That's why he went for the pearls. I begged him not to, but..."

"Treatments!?"

Helena sighed. "I'm dying, Bastila. I did not lie about that. It's been a long time in the coming, and there's really nothing that can be done anymore. I told your father to let me go, but you know how he was. Stubborn. Like you."

Bastila began to cry. The tears were long in coming but they slowly dripped down her face. "I'm so sorry, Mother. I don't know what to say... "

Helena's hand closed around Bastila's hand that held the holocron and said softly,"Keep the holocron, Bastila. It would do me good to know you have it. This... talking to you... this is what I really needed before I... "

"I know, Mother. Thank you. I'm glad we talked, too. "

Bastila looked at me and mouthed. Thank you….

I nodded. I began to slowly step out of the cantina so that Bastila could be alone with her mother, but before I could leave. Helena called out. "You there….you take care of my daughter, you hear me?"

I snorted. "As if she'd let me."

"You make her let you. She's too much like her father in that respect."

I nodded and left the Cantina.

* * *

 ** **~Bastila~****

My heart was healed. Revan...well Phoenix had brought me peace and resolution with my mother. How could she do that? Perhaps I had misjudged her taint. This was not the actions of a woman fallen to the Dark Side despite the fact that Phoenix was wearing Dark Jedi robes. I felt confused, puzzled. There was still a dark aura around Phoenix. But...Phoenix could have soured the relationship between me and my mother. Instead….I found myself hugging my mother and crying with her. Phoenix was right. Denying my emotions for my mother, and being reserved….in her presence well….it made me as cold and unfeeling as a Sith.

"Mother….where are you going to go?"

"It doesn't matter, dear. Don't you worry about me."

I quietly dug into my credit pouch. "Here. Take these 500 credits. It's all I have. Go to Coruscant and find a doctor. I'll meet you there after... after what I have to do."

"But I already told you there's nothing that can -"

"Please, take it. I... want to see you again. When we can talk."

I watched as my mother sighed and then said,"Alright, I will. Now you do what you have to, Bastila. You go make your father and I proud."

"I'll try. Farewell, Mother."

My mother kissed me lightly on my cheek and then left the Cantina. I took a long deep breath and pondered over what just happened. I felt suddenly ashamed of the conversation I had with Carth. Although Phoenix may have taken a dark step, she still had a good soul about her. I only hoped she'd stay on that path.

I exited the cantina and looked at Phoenix. "I….want to apologize."

"Apologize? Apologize for what?"

"My first thoughts about you. Well I thought…..you'd fallen to the Dark Side. Well….no one could….well...do what you did with my mother and I….and be….well….a servant of the Dark Side."

Phoenix sighed. "Bastila, don't get confused. I am tainted. There is darkness in me. I couldn't have done what I did against the Sand People without being tainted with darkness. Perhaps I am just a bit stronger against it, but I am not immune to its call. I am possessed by Revan's spirit, Bastila. And..."

She then glared at me but then her gaze softened. "I am upset at you and the Order….but I don't want to spoil the feelings you just had with your mother."

"Upset?"

"I have learned that Revan was not a man. She was a woman. Why the deception, Bastila?"

I paused and looked at Revan and sighed. "It was Revan's lie, Phoenix. I can't honestly say why she preferred to be called a man. Revan wore a mask and chose to hide her identity. Perhaps she sought to remove herself from her past. Perhaps she wanted the Mandalorians to fear her under the mystique of being a man. Perhaps, as a Sith, she sought to be known under the title Sith Lord. Lord is a title normally given to a man. Regardless, the Jedi accepted Revan's deception and accepted it as truth. Believe me, when I found out Revan was a woman…..I was just as startled. Her death...was unsettling. But please… can we not talk about this anymore? Revan's death pains me."

Phoenix nodded and grasped my hand. "There is another thing. I think...we need to stop being lovers. My attacking the Sand People and my darkness… well….it dealt mainly with being your lover. It's clear I don't have the self control that I should have. It is probably influenced by our bond too. It….drives me to too many extremes. I am an intense person, Bastila but the bond well it highlights my erratic nature a bit more than I would like."

This was true and I felt a burden slip from me. "I agree, Phoenix. I've wanted to say the same. I have feelings for you but this isn't healthy for either one of us. Plus if Malak or others in the Sith found out…."

Phoenix looked sad. She sighed and then leaned into me and gave me one more kiss upon my lips. She nodded. "This will be hard on both of us….but it's for the best, I think."

"Come….we should get back to the Hawk."

* * *

A/N: And I was going to do a Mission/Griff POV…but there is so much in this chapter already. It didn't feel right to squeeze Mission and Griff in this when there was so much exposition in this to begin with plus a lot of history with either Revan or Akume.

Ether: Thanks for the points in the last chapter. I slightly tweaked a few sentences here and there in the last chapter. Manipulative Bat…lol. Yea, Kreia is at that. Yet….I love that old manipulative witch just the same. lol


	55. Chapter 54:Tatooine:Bridging Connections

**Chapter 54: Tatooine: Bridging Connections**

 **~Carth~**

I looked at Phoenix as she entered the Hawk. She looked as if she was tired and worn out. I frowned at her attire and my heart sank. She was wearing Dark Jedi robes, had she truly fallen as Bastila worried about. I needed to talk to her and so I grasped her hands wanting to get her attention and she cringed. I let go of her hands and I saw the reddish burns on her hands. "Phoenix….your hands….that looks painful."

She turned a shade of embarrassed, a red that looked as red as the burns on her hands. "I'd rather not talk about it, Carth."

"My little Raven, we really do need to talk."

"Talk about what? The fact that I slaughtered the Sand People and for a moment I enjoyed it. Yes, Carth. I enjoyed it and the more I killed the more I wanted to do it. They were brutal monsters. They deserved it. I am a monster, Carth. There is darkness within me. I wish….I wish I never felt the Force."

I tried to think what I could say to her, I had to say something. Yet, I was no Jedi. Even Bastila seemed to think maybe I could save Phoenix from herself. "At least you acknowledge that you have darkness within you. I doubt….well I doubt the Sith would even think twice about what they have done. They wouldn't blink an eye. Look at what Malak did to Taris, Phoenix. Do you think he had any remorse about it?"

She looked thoughtful as she pondered my words. She then stated, "How can you know or even presume what Malak's thoughts are? They are dark and black as his former master."

"You're right, Phoenix. I can't fathom Malak's actions or if he has or had any remorse. But you do, Phoenix. This makes you more of a Jedi than Malak or even Revan was."

She was quiet for a moment and then she said softly. "I am afraid I am not much of a Jedi, Carth. I have issues with the Order and their teachings. But…." She said, "you're right….I do have remorse. Does that make me better than the Sith?"

"My Raven, my sweet confused little bird. You are so much better than Malak or his Sith minions. You're my beautiful raven haired angel."

She laughed. "Angel. Hardly, I am not one of those winged creatures from the moons of Lego. But nice try, I doubt they have black hair either."

I grabbed Phoenix's hands and rubbed them. "Let's get some kolto salve on those hands of yours and...well.."

I passionately kissed Phoenix on her mouth and she gasped. She looked at me as if it had been a lifetime since we had kissed. She said softly, "Thanks, Republic. Thanks for reminding me who I am. I...well I feel like I've forgotten who I am and I was slowly drifting away from who I was and becoming someone I didn't like."

"I know….you were scaring me Phoenix. You were scaring Mission as well."

Phoenix paled. "Sithspit….Mission's brother. I…" She paused. "I think he came back to Anchorhead. I am not sure. I'll worry about him and Mission if we don't find him."

"Yea Mission bolted off earlier. She's probably looking for him and then there's the fact that Zaalbar, Juhani, Canderous, and T3 went off to free some wookiee slaves. They left us a note telling us they went off to help the wookiees here."

Phoenix sighed. "Wonderful. I could have probably have helped out but no, I was selfish….I..."

I frowned. "You are hardly selfish, Phoenix. You were trying to help Bastila and Mission out. Besides, Juhani is a very capable Jedi. She wanted to do this. If you try and take too much on your shoulders...well….I think you already have in many respects."

"You're probably right, Republic." She then sighed. "Come on let's go get out of this ship. I am itchy."

"No offense, Phoenix but you look half dead. You need to rest."

She rolled her eyes. "Damn it! I am fine. I am a Jedi, maybe not the best one in the galaxy, but…."

She took a deep breath and I watched as the weariness faded from her and she looked refreshed. Yet, it didn't really fool me. She needed rest, pure rest, not some Jedi technique to take away the weariness from her body.

"That's fake….Phoenix. You still need to rest. You're not fooling me."

She smiled and snuggled against my chest. "Well you want to force me into a bed, Republic….now's your chance."

My jaw dropped. "Damn, you're the most persistent woman I've ever known and...that's not what I meant."

She grinned. "Well then stop trying to get me into a bunk."

"Stop twisting my words into something else."

Phoenix chuckled. "Mmm….maybe I will rest...if...you rest with me."

"Damn! You're too damn manipulative for your own damn good, Phoenix."

She laughed and I shook my head, this was the Phoenix I remembered, the teasing and playful woman that I remembered on Taris. I knew it was wrong of me but I really wanted Phoenix the smuggler with the roguish brash attitude rather than Phoenix the Jedi. What had happened to that woman? At times she seemed so distant and removed; I latched onto this side of Phoenix, the part that wasn't a Jedi on a mission to find Star Maps and confront Malak.

Something about her scared me. Some fate was in store for her that I couldn't explain. I wasn't a Jedi, yet I couldn't help but feel that the Jedi were throwing her to the wolves. There was something that even Bastila wasn't telling her. I couldn't figure out what that was but I'd have to talk to her about it. Sadly, now really wasn't the time because I had just grasped her back from some inner demon that seemed to want her very soul.

"Fine...we'll look for Mission and her brother. But I want you to rest and if that means….well...we'll find some place private, my little manipulative Raven."

She nodded and she said softly. "I feel warm and safe with you, Carth. It's like the galaxy at large can go to kriffing hell for all I care...at least...well for a few moments in my life."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

My relationship with Bastila was over, I wanted nothing more to do with her. She pulled me into dangerous paths. I just couldn't risk it. Although, yea I had feelings for her. I knew that the safest course of action was to end it and to purse my relationship with Carth. I still felt….I needed to tell him what happened with me and Bastila, but….I couldn't. I just couldn't find the guts to tell the truth. Plus it was over between Bastila and I. We both knew that and even Bastila agreed with me. She could probably still lead me into a relationship though, damn Force Bond. I didn't want it anymore. There had to be a way to sever it...like getting Revan out of my body.

 _There is no way to sever that bond or the connection between us either, Phoenix._

Frack, Revan you pick the most inopportune times to haunt me. Go away.

 _Our relationship doesn't work like that and you know it._

Relationship! What the hell, we don't have a relationship, Revan! Frack, you're a dead Sith Lord possessing my body. Why would I even think of you in that way?

Revan laughed. _What is it with you thinking that relationships are like that?_

No wonder Carth worried about me, with this fracking Sith Lord possessing me, he could probably tell that I was erratic as hell. I tried to tune Revan out. Yet, no matter how much I wanted to be rid of Revan, Revan was right. The Jedi needed Revan's spirit to help find the Star Maps. I always knew that. Yet….I wanted so badly to be rid of her and her influence. If I tried to expel her...well the Order wouldn't be able to stop Malak….frack...I am fracking screwed.

 _Ahh now you understand why you can't get rid of me. You're a pawn, a tool of the Jedi Order. The Jedi do not normally take really old padawan_ _ _s__ _ _. You are only a padawan because of me. I suppose it can't be helped, Phoenix. Perhaps you can get rid of me after….well after you find the Star Forge.__

Why can't you tell me where the Star Forge is now, Revan? Why do I have to hunt these damn maps?

 _Because...I don't have that knowledge, Phoenix. My apprentice...attacked me! I am...well... damn it...I didn't lie to you earlier that I didn't know who I was. Yet….you've helped me, Phoenix. You've helped bridge connections I did not have. Perhaps eventually I will know the location of the Star Forge. But….at this moment...I don't know. The Star Forge might as well be in the watery core of Naboo for all I know._

I snorted. Your honesty has not been the most convincing, Revan. You lied about being a man. You taunted me earlier about what you do and do not know. You've poked and harassed me and you're telling me you don't know where the Star Forge is!

 _I don't. I swear to you…._

Swear! Is there anything that you can swear that I honestly can believe?! I am not even sure if you're even telling me the truth now. You've been illusive and utterly deceptive to me. Are you trying to tell me you don't know? I find that really hard to believe.

 _I swear on the Force! I am not lying to you. I swear by my own father and mother. Frack….I can't even remember who the kriffing hell they are! They are….Onderonian and nobility that is close to the royal family. But I swear….I don't know anything else! If I can't even remember who my father and mother are. Then it's obvious I can't remember where the Star Forge is. If I did know, don't you think I'd tell you?! Being connected to you is….unpleasant. My memory isn't what it was….everything is...well out of order and fragmented. I know some things but not others. I think this is your fault, Phoenix!_

I snorted. My fault! I beg your pardon. How the frack is this my fault!? You apparently know more than what you're saying, so go away because I don't believe you! Period!

The Sith Lord grumbled and growled at me and then her voice faded away.

I cringed and moaned in pain as Carth applied salve to my hands.

"Sorry…."

I smiled as he administered treatment to my hands. Sithspit. Why did I even pursue Bastila in the first place? Carth loved me. He cared for me, tended to me. I was like the damn kath hound, in a fable I had read as a child, that saw another kath hound with a bone in its mouth then dropped the bone into a pond. Carth was well….I wanted to latch onto him, he felt like a light in the darkness that threatened to overwhelm me.

"There's a Force power that causes your hands to be….burned like this?"

"Force lighting, Carth. It's fueled by….anger, hate….and I never really gave much thought about how I could do it. It just sort of came naturally to me. Well….I was so carried away….what scares me Carth….I didn't even feel my hands burn nor did I notice the pain….till now."

He shook his head. "You do realize, that you're fragile, Phoenix?"

"Frack, Carth I am not a glass doll."

"Glass no...but you still can be hurt and you can still break."

He gently rubbed the salve into my hands and then gently massaged my hands. The redness was slowly fading away. He then lightly kissed my fingers.

I smiled. I missed being close to Carth like this and yea, Carth was right. I could be hurt and be damaged. I bent and flexed my hands and fingers. The kolto salve had done its job.

I sighed. "Carth….why are you doing this?"

"Phoenix…I never thought it was possible I could love another woman like I did my wife. I worry about you, care about you. Let me….well let me care for you. Let me watch over you and if you will….let me….let me protect you."

"Protect me? Protect me from what?"

"From yourself."

"But...how? I am a Jedi."

Carth sighed. "All that power….Phoenix….and I am scared for you."

"Scared?"

"Yes. I worry that….well look what happened to the Sand People. Well I don't know how to protect you...but you have to let me try."

I sighed. "Alright, Carth….although I think….well..." I paused, not sure how to respond to Carth's request. He smiled. "No words, Phoenix….just let me try."

I shook my head and said nothing else regarding his desire to protect me. "Well let's go see if we can find Mission and her brother."

We walked to the egress of the Hawk when HK approached us. Supplication: Master, my potential is wasted on this ship. Please let me come with you. I can kill something for you.

Carth made a face. Okay, so it was obvious that Carth disliked the droid. Frankly, I was under the impression that no one else liked the droid, except perhaps Canderous. I mused lightly, no it was better to leave him behind considering, Carth's reaction. Yet, it was obvious that HK needed something to do. "No, HK. But you can protect….Bastila. She's under threat from Malak."

Carth's eyes went wide. "Really Phoenix...I don't think Bastila needs HK to protect her. In fact I think she wouldn't like that."

HK responded. Statement: The whiny simpering Republic meatbag is correct. The prissy Jedi meatbag does not need my protection. In fact she said to me that she is meditating and requested not to be disturbed.

Carth interjected, "Whiny….now listen here…."

I put a hand on Carth's shoulder. "Republic….please let me handle this."

I turned to HK. "Then go into standby mode. Wait a minute that reminds me I need to work repairs on you. You can use that time in standby to run a diagnostic.

Resignation: Very well, master. I will go into standby mode and run a diagnostic."

The assassin droid wandered off back into the ship and Carth shook his head. "I hate that droid. Seriously, Phoenix we should dismantle the damn thing and sell him off as spare parts."

"Carth….he saved my life. I would have been dead or in Malak or Admiral Karath's clutches if HK hadn't arrived when he did."

Carth sighed. "Fine….since he calls you his master, you're responsible for the damn thing. But if that droid even considers hurting any member of this ship. I'll space it out the airlock."

"Carth, HK can't do anything without my orders."

"That's what worries me…."

My face screwed up in anger. "Seriously Carth. I am not a loose cannon. If HK even considered harming anyone. I'd space him out the airlock before you."

Carth cringed. "I am sorry, Phoenix."

"Damn straight you should be, Republic….I thought…."

I paused and licked my lips in thought, although maybe I was a loose cannon considering the fact that I had slaughtered the Sand People in cold blood. Maybe Carth had a reason to be worried.

"You….might be right…." I sighed. "Look if it makes you feel better, I'll come up with something to try and curb HK's destructive and murderous impulses. I know droids….and I know programming. I think I can come up with some sort of protocol pacifist package. I'll install it as an inactive upgrade into HK's chassis. I'll give it a vocal activation and deactivation code. You can come up with the code yourself and if….HK or if I act out of line. You can speak the code and HK will become harmless."

"I...I appreciate the thought, Phoenix but….well...I shouldn't doubt you. You're a good woman, Phoenix. Your heart has always been in the right place."

I sighed. "I try, Carth. I am not perfect. There are better Jedi than I and worse than me. Please don't put me on a pedestal. I am human and a very flawed one at that. I try to do what is right. Maybe I stray a bit but I do honestly try."

"That's all I hope for, Phoenix and that's all I expect."

* * *

 **~Mission~**

"I don't believe this, you're hitting me up for credits!"

"Come on sis….I need those credits to hit the swoop track and you look like you're doing well, financially, I mean."

I shook my head. "Griff you're a horrible racer. I've seen you with the Hidden Beks. Gadon never trusted you to even complete a run during the swoop races."

I was getting angry at my brother. "Besides….you hit me up for credits! You don't even say, I am so glad my sis survived Taris. Plus there's what Lena said about you, is it true….is it true you left me on Taris?"

"I am happy you survived Taris, Mish, believe me. Plus who are you going to believe, Sis. There's the truth and then there's the truth…."

"So it is true, you did abandoned me on Taris!"

"Look Sis, you didn't need me. Yea, you were young but I taught you everything you knew. You could look after yourself."

"I could look after myself! I don't believe…. No, Lena was right about you, you are a core slime. Don't talk to me."

I turned away from my brother and stormed off but my exit from the office was delayed when Nix and Carth entered. My eyes lit up seeing my friends. "Nix…."

She seemed quite solemn and her shoulders seemed heavy. She was dressed all in black Dark Jedi robes. She looked a bit haunted in her features, but when she saw me she offered me a good natured smile. "I see you found your brother."

I snorted. "Yea, the core slime abandoned me on Taris, Nix. Can you believe it?"

She sighed. "I kind of figured….well..." She bit her lip. "I didn't want to speak ill of your brother and all but your brother doesn't seem like he's well….a reliable individual."

I was about to nod when Griff came over and interjected, "I just want to thank you for rescuing me from the Sand People. I wish I could reward you but I don't have a single credit to my name."

Nix looked at Griff with a hard glare. "Fine thanks you give me after you skipped out on your own flesh and blood and indirectly you led to the death of Bastian Shan."

Griff looked at Nix and gulped as he saw the lightsaber hanging from her belt and the Dark Jedi robes she wore. "Err...look….I didn't intend to have the Sand People attack us. As for Mission, I'll tell you as I told her, Mission is perfectly capable of taking care of herself."

Nix snorted. "If Carth and I hadn't come across your sister….she would have died on Taris. You disgust me, Griff Vao."

Nix dug into her pouch and began to dig out credits and said to my brother, "It's apparent that you don't give a damn for your sister and I sense you are only latching onto her for a pay day. You think that because I am a Jedi I must be rolling in credits."

Griff looked a bit perplexed but his eyes looked greedily at Nix's credit pouch. "I care deeply about my little sister...do you think you can bribe me? I haven't even asked you for credits!"

Nix laughed. "Oh please! You care so much for her you left her to rot on Taris. You haven't asked me for credits….yet. But let me head you off on that. Here, here's five hundred credits take it and leave Tatooine. Mission no longer needs your influence in her life."

Carth frowned. "Now wait a minute, what the hell are you doing Phoenix? Why are you trying to separate Mission from her brother?"

Nix glared at Carth. "Be quiet, Republic this is my affair not yours."

Carth glowered back at Nix. "I won't….Phoenix…..stop this at once!"

"I told you to be quiet, Republic. This is between me and Griff. I know what I am doing, have some faith in me. You trusted me back on Taris, trust me now!"

Carth muttered, "All right Phoenix, but that doesn't mean I have to like this."

I scowled at my brother. If he really did care for me he'd refuse the credits. If he did take the credits, then it proved he really hadn't changed at all.

He sighed. "I can't….I love my little sister….but…."

He looked at Nix, his eyes glinted at the credits that she held in her hand. He licked his lips hungrily. Come on Griff, stop being so predictably pathetic.

"If you make it eight hundred credits…"

"Geeze Griff...I see how it is with you; all you can think about is a quick mark and the quest for a quick cred chip."

"I am sorry Sis….but I really do need credits and eight hundred credits...well…."

Nix pressed eight hundred credits into Griff's hand. "Well….now that we agreed to that, you should leave."

He shook his head as if he suddenly woke up out of a spice induced trance. I glared at him angrily. How could my own flesh and blood be so stupid? He had sold me out and I looked a bit angrily at Nix, how could she do this?

"No, Jedi I can't leave my sister. Please don't ask me to leave my sister, I just found her again….and I really did fear she was dead on Taris. I can't leave her. Please don't make me leave her."

Nix folded her arms up and looked at Grff with a sad look on her face. "So you'd take my credits but refuse to leave. So you do care about your sister after all but….your actions prove that all you'd do is abandon her again or worse."

My gaze at Nix softened and she laid a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it. "I am sorry, Mish….but it's time you see how your brother is and…."

She sighed heavily and she turned to Griff. "Look it's really for the best that you do leave, Griff because it's apparent that when push comes to shove you'll abandon her again for the same reasons you abandoned her on Taris. I trapped you Griff and sadly you fell for it. You could have turned your back on my offer and it would have proven that you had changed, but you haven't. The next time what will you do for credits? What will you do to settle your debts? Your sister is older now and an attractive young twi'lek. So….would you sell your sister off as a pleasure slave? You don't even know me, except that I am a Jedi and a friend of your sister's but who is to say the next time you'll sell your sister off to a hutt or even to a gamorrean? Your love for your sister is eclipsed by your desire to get rich and to settle your debts."

Griff looked ashamed. "Mish, your Jedi friend is right….I am no good for you. She's correct, she has trapped me. I am sorry….Mission. Really I am. Maybe one of these days I'll be able to take care of you properly. Until then….you're better off with your Jedi friend."

He sighed and then gave me a hug. He offered Nix back her credits but Nix shook her head. "Keep the credits, Griff. A reminder of the lesson I've given you about how greed can blind you, even to your family. Use the credits to try to become worthy of your sister. If you can't then I predict it will be a long time before you will see each other again."

Griff gave me one more hug. "Good bye Mission. I am glad you're not dead."

I gave one more agonized glance at my brother. He was glad I wasn't dead, but Nix had tricked him into showing his true nature. Her "trick" or "lesson" to Griff hurt. It was painful, painful to realize that my brother couldn't take care of me let alone take care of himself.

He left the swoop track office and I shook my head at Nix. "I can't believe my brother did that. I know you meant well, but it hurts that Griff is blinded by his desire to get rich rather than the love of his family. At least you gave him a chance to start over, although those credits are probably a waste. He'll probably use them in another get rich quick scheme."

Nix nodded. "Probably, but it is my hope that my lesson at least taught him something."

Carth looked at Nix. "Damn it, Phoenix that was a rather cruel way to teach Mission's brother a lesson. Plus a little warning would have been nice."

Nix's voice lowered into a somber timbre."Sorry, Republic. However, life is cruel and not all lessons learned in life are pleasant. As for giving you a warning, this was something I couldn't do as I often think fast on my feet and this was one of those moments were I couldn't tell you a thing till I sprung that stratagem on Griff. I know you hate that, Carth, but this wasn't unlike how I was back on Taris with Brejik. Sadly, this worked though because Griff learned a hard lesson about his own nature. He loves Mission, but...his desire to get rich overpowers him. Maybe one of these days he won't be like that but I am not holding my breath. Plus Mission is better off with us as it is."

I sighed, regrettably Nix was right, Griff was a pathetic low life. He loved me but he just couldn't seem to get past his own inadequacies.

Nix smiled softly. "Well we're here at the swoop track office….how about you and me run a few rec runs to...well...help us clear our heads."

I grinned at Nix. "You're on!

My grin then faded. "Nix...what is it about you wearing Dark Jedi robes anyway?"

"I knew that question was going to come up."

Carth said quietly. "I didn't want to pry either but since Mission asked, why are you wearing those robes? It makes me feel a bit uncomfortable around you."

Nix paused and let out a deep breath and then said, "I don't particularly feel worthy of wearing the robes of a Jedi. I...well….I have failed the Order. I acted out of anger and touched the Dark Side."

Carth shook his head. "Listen here….Phoenix. I know you feel like you've failed, but I don't think you have. You're still acting very much like a Jedi. Yea, maybe you're a bit unorthodox in the way you act….but..."

Nix shook her head. "Look, when I feel worthy to once again wear the robes of a proper Jedi, I will wear them. Until then, I will wear these robes."

Carth frowned. "When will that be, Phoenix? You're being very hard on yourself. I don't know what Bastila would say, but I think she'd say you're setting yourself up for a fall acting like this."

I nodded. "I agree with Carth, Nix. Stop being stubborn like a bantha and stop beating yourself up. So you made a mistake, I was able to forgive Griff. Look Nix, it's time you forgive yourself."

"Damn it...you two...I see I can't win. Fine...I won't wear Dark Jedi robes but…frankly I am not worthy of any of those robes. Dark or otherwise. Do you still wish to do rec runs with me Mish or not?"

I smiled and said,"Of course, Nix. I just wanted to let you know….that well...I worry about you."

Nix grumbled something under her breath and moved off to one of the counters to pay for some rec runs.

I looked at Carth. "Is she….alright, Carth?"

Carth sighed. "I don't know, Mission. I just don't know. It's like she's torn up inside, conflicted. She wants to do what's right for all of us. She wants to follow the mission the Jedi gave to her but...she seems as though if we weren't here for her...well….maybe the Jedi Council was right to allow us to come with her."

"You think she'd fall without us being here?"

Carth nodded. "I am afraid so, Mission. She needs us….I wonder what she was like….before well before she met any of us."

"She traveled on her own, Carth. At least that's what she told me. I think she's always been a loner, Carth. She's not used to being around others. I think that's why she gets testy around all of us."

Carth looked thoughtful. "That's a good point and with her ability to use the Force now….." He paused, "Well I won't let her hurt herself, that's all there is to it. If I have to keep her from falling to the Dark Side I will."

Nix returned with a grin on her face. "It's all set Mish….let's go run some rec runs on a swoop bike."

I smiled at Carth. "I better not keep the swoop bike waiting, Carth. And don't worry about Nix and me…."

* * *

A/N And this is the next chapter I have. I tried to add more to it about Mission's suspicions but….it just didn't feel right to me. It's obvious that Mission has knowledge about Phoenix and all but she's going to keep it to herself at the moment. I also had a Bastila POV but it didn't feel right either. So I've got small chapters with various points of views but that's what I have so far….

One quick note. I did a few corrections on my last chapter. Not much, but I slightly changed the sentence structure regarding Akume. It felt repetitive at best and I tried to tighten it up some.


	56. Ch55:Tatooine:Alternating Directions

**Chapter 55:Tatooine: Alternating Directions**

 **~Bastila~**

I stared at the mask that lay upon my lap as I sat cross-legged in deep meditation. I could feel lingering traces of Pho...Revan's presence on the mask. I traced my fingers over the mask.

My eyes closed and I saw the past. Revan dying in my arms. Tears flowed down my face as I heard her words echoing in my memory.

 _"Please…. Don't let…..Malak…..must keep….the order of the galaxy intact."_

How could Revan get so far from her original intentions? Or did she? Yet, Revan had been a Jedi when she left for the wars, that was clear. How did her ideals become so twisted? Yet in the end her words held the same desire she had when she left for war. A desire to keep the galaxy balanced and in order. Yet order within the Dark Side? The Dark Side brought chaos, it brought destruction and death. There was no order from the Dark Side, at least none that I could see. Over and over again, I pondered this. I needed to stop brooding over unanswered questions. Part of me had to know, why did Revan fall? There were no answers that made sense to me. I knew I had an unhealthy fixation on Revan and the bond I had with her didn't help. Yet, interacting with Phoenix convinced me of one thing and one thing alone, that went back to all those months back, I had always wanted Revan to live and I couldn't let her die. Working with Phoenix, I believed I saw small glimpses of the woman she had once been. I had never met Revan as a Jedi Knight, as I had only been a young child, an apprentice, when Revan had gone off to war. If I had been older, would I have gone off with her? I tried to reason that I understood the wisdom of the council, but I had only been a child. I had been much too young to even join Revan even if I had believed in her cause.

I had sacrificed so much of myself rescuing Revan from Malak. After this mission was over….we'd be bonded regardless. I was tied to her, an invisible strand or cord of the Force, that at times I felt I was going to be strangled with. I didn't want to be, perhaps that was why I reached out for a relationship with her. Thinking about it, I felt dread at the days, the months, and years ahead tied to a woman whose fate and destiny lay in my hands. Despite the fact, that this was not the way a Jedi should be, I wanted a companion, someone to share that burden. I felt so alone at times, I truly had no one who could carry the load I bore upon my shoulders. The only one who even had some sense of that burden was Phoenix….errr...Revan. Yet reaching out to the same woman whose charge lay in my hands was a mistake.

I loved Revan, and as much as I didn't want to admit to that love, it had drawn us together. Yet, to my horror I recognized that my love was one sided. Revan didn't really love me. Sure, at times she thought she did but she felt compelled to that love by our bond. I saw for what it was and she truly and completely loved Carth Onasi. I could feel it, she loved him with a brilliance that almost was blinding, even to me. In the end our relationship felt forced and I could not in good conscience continue it. I felt guilty that we had gone this far. Her reacting to the Sand People and reaching out with the Dark Side….if she had not stopped me… I would have been the one that had drawn on the Dark Side. Revan had spared me and taken the guilt and the pain upon herself. I felt the remorse and anguish swirl around her like a maelstrom. Perhaps it mirrored my own condemnation and pain as well.

"Bastila…..what are you doing with that mask?"

I looked up to find Juhani. She looked tired and her fur was drenched in sweat.

I sighed and gathered up the mask and put it in my pack. "I keep it to remind me of the tragedy of Revan's fall and how one person could be corrupted by the Dark Side."

"I thought that mask was destroyed…along with everything else that belonged to Darth Revan."

"I...I need it to keep myself centered and to remind me of our mission, Juhani."

"I understand. I only have to stare at Phoenix and remember that she saved me from the Dark Side. She saved me once before, did I tell you that?

I rolled my eyes. "Yes….you told me the first time."

Juhani noticed the annoyance in my eyes and in my voice. She stated, "I apologize if I have offended you, Bastila. Yet I want you to know that Phoenix was and is a good woman. I was a slave on the auction block on Taris, Bastila. She came with Revan and she drove fear into the hearts of the slavers that were planning on selling me. She was such a paragon of goodness and light. She thoroughly glowed with the Force. Yes, I know she fell but….I believe in the woman she is now. I know she was a Jedi called Akume, Bastila. I know little of who Akume is and that she may have been one of the most evil and vile of Revan's minions but...she's no longer that woman. Frankly, I don't care about her dark past. She has been redeemed and I have no doubt that we will defeat Malak with her aid."

I sighed, Juhani was so confident and so sure of herself and Phoenix. She believed in Revan's past and the woman she had been. It still raised the question within me: how could Revan fall?

I frowned a bit, I did not sense that Juhani was alone, yes there was Canderous but there were others. "Juhani…..why do I sense that we've picked up more lifeforms?"

Juhani smiled. "I am fulfilling the mission of the Jedi, Bastila."

I groaned inwardly. "You need to be mindful of our overall mission, Juhani not get distracted by different tangents!"

Juhani hissed. "And seeing to your father and your mother….isn't that also a distraction or a tangent!"

I cringed, the pain of my father's death still echoed through me and Juhani paused and stated, "Forgive me, Bastila I did not mean to cut you so forcefully with my words."

"No you are right, Juhani. It's just that….we really need to focus on our mission towards the Star Forge. Somehow we seem to always get distracted by other things. Anyway how many….lifeforms have we picked up?"

"Freyya, Zaalbar's father, Zaalbar's promised mate, Wrrljiykam, and ummm…..twenty or so wookiees….and errr one human."

"Twenty or so wookiees! They'll eat up all our supplies on the Hawk, plus where will we berth all of them?"

"I actually had an idea about food, Bastila. We have all those gizka that Phoenix picked up and I am sure Phoenix wouldn't mind if some of them got consumed by hungry wookiees. As for where they will berth, I am sure they wouldn't mind the cargo hold, at least till we get to Kashyyyk.

I sighed. "Yes….I suppose that is a way to get rid of some of those annoying reptiles. I just hope the wookiees are not that picky about what they eat. And what of this human?"

"He was a human that worked for Czerka. He's an old friend of Carth's, his name is Jordo Calrissian. He said he served with Carth with the Telosian militia. I sensed no deception from him, Bastila."

I nodded. "Very well….we will let Carth talk and deal with his friend. You really need to take a bath, Juhani."

Juhani scrunched up her face. "Cathar do not bathe…we groom ourselves."

"Juhani, you are beyond grooming. You look like a drenched womp rat."

Juhani sighed. "But….I don't like water….and I hate baths. Oh….here…." She handed me a datapad.

"What's this?"

"It is a map to the ruins that Czerka ran into, there's a krayt dragon near it. I had a feeling that this would be of interest to you and Phoenix."

I took a look at the datapad that had the map. "Hmm this looks interesting. According to the schematics that Czerka has with this map, these ruins look a bit vast and look like an underground network that leads up to a temple complex. If there's a krayt dragon, no doubt the creature has been drawn to the area because of the Dark Side."

I smiled softly at Juhani and said. "Thank you, Juhani, you have done a good job. I am sorry, I got upset at you about bringing a load of wookiees with us. It is obvious that our next stop will most definitely will be Kashyyyk. I don't think any of us will be able to handle that many wookiees on our ship for a long time. Now please, Juhani go take a bath, you have a….rather unpleasant aroma about you."

Juhani made a face and her fangs showed from her mouth. "I know I am going to hate this….but….I suppose thirty seconds….a minute….."

I shook my head. "Try five minutes."

"Five minutes! I'll catch my death from all that water!"

"No you won't. Breath….Juhani….relax you'll be fine."

Juhani sighed and began muttering the Jedi code as she went to the 'fresher. "There is no emotion there is peace….there is peace…..there is peace…."

I shook my head, how could….well Juhani was from a feline race, and felines had a notorious dislike for water. I just didn't think Juhani would be so...driven by her species' dislike of water.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

All these damn howls, grunts, and moans from a dozen or more wookiees was enough to drive me crazy.

It's a good thing I had Jordo with me. He seemed to understand the wookiees and he ushered them into the cargo hold. They sniffed, growled and hooted at him suspiciously. It seemed that they did not trust him, course they didn't seem to trust me either but him more so.

He said firmly, "Look, I am sorry….but you're safe now and I won't have Czerka claim you as lost property."

The wookiees growled at him and we left them to the cargo hold

I shook my head at the man apologizing to the wookiees and wondered if he was like Carth. "So is it true you know Carth?"

"Yea I do. We go way back."

"Tell me….what stories of combat do you have with the man?"

"Look Mandalorian, I really don't feel like rehashing the war with you. We fought against you with the Jedi. We beat you….end of story. We saved Telos from your lot only to have Revan and Malak bomb our planet into one big acidic vapor pool. Carth has every right not to like you or the Sith."

"And what are the reasons for that? I don't dislike Carth. I see him as a strong man who is loyal to his Republic clan. Loyalty even among Mandalorians is a good trait to have. I admire him for it, even though we were on opposite sides during the war."

"Aside from the fact that he fought for his home during the Mandalorian wars and the fact that the Sith killed his wife and took his kid from him."

"So Carth has scars from the wars, that's no excuse to take it personally against everyone, Jordo. You don't see me whining over it. My wife… and family...well….we were starving after that battle on Malachor V. I had no choice but to leave and take to mercenary work. I sent whatever creds I could to her for food and whatever I could send. We exchanged transmissions with each other for a time. She finally left me and took my children and...I haven't heard from her since. You think you Republic types are the only ones that suffered from the wars."

Jordo frowned at me. "The Mandalorian Wars were wars of your people's making, Mandalorian. You deserve what you got from it. I don't feel sorry for you, your people, or your wife and children. I doubt you feel sorry for me or Carth either."

I glared at the man a flash of anger rushed through me but I held it back. He was right. I didn't feel sorry for Carth or him. Sorrow and regret were emotions that I tried to bury deep within me. I had my own regret that quietly simmered up when I wasn't fighting or when I wasn't an enforcer with Davik. I didn't want other people's regret boring into me.

"War is war….Jordo. It's horrors and its travesties are shared equally among us all. So yea, you're right I don't feel sorry for you or Carth. All any of us can do is go forward and not look back."

Jordo nodded. "And I agree with you on that, Mandalorian. It's why I left my family back on Citadel Station on Telos and went to work for Czerka."

My admiration for the man improved. He was like me, he had left his family unit and was working to support them. "Then I suggest we focus on what we do agree on, Jordo and not with what we don't agree with."

He nodded. "Fair enough…"

I heard noise coming from the gangplank of the Hawk.

"I say you cheated, Nix."

I heard Phoenix's booming laugh. "Cheated….I don't cheat. I just uhh….well I am a Jedi...it's not my fault that I move quicker than the average human. And besides we were doing rec runs, we weren't keeping score, last time I checked."

I heard Carth laugh. "Take it easy you two….or am I going to have to separate you two from the rest of the crew."

They passed by us and Carth's eyes went wide. "Jordo…..Jordo Calrissian, what are you doing here? Last time I checked you were on….well Telos…."

"That's a long story….Carth. I'd rather….well...I'd rather talk to you about the past over some drinks and…."

His eyes went toward Phoenix. "Who's the pretty lady?" He ribbed Carth gently, "Tell me you're not…and a Jedi at that...I thought Jedi didn't…." He paused a moment, "well you know...suppose to be involved with scruffy nerf herders like you."

Carth coughed and Phoenix turned a bit red. Jordo responded with a smile, "Ehh it's alright….I get it. It's just after all this time..." He smiled softly at Phoenix. "It's just good to see Carth with someone after….well...I know Carth went through a rough patch what with…." Jordo paused and then said to Phoenix, "And you are?"

"Jedi Padawan Phoenix Lynn Star…." She bowed politely before Jordo and I rolled my eyes. It seemed as though, Phoenix was really showing off in front of Carth, using all the honorifics she had available to her. Phoenix Lynn? Who uses their full name like that? She really had it bad for the Republic.

Carth latched onto Phoenix's arm and smiled. "Yes..well….I think there is a restaurant and hotel here on this planet, it's attached to the cantina. We could have a few drinks, have dinner, talk about old times and well try and forget this awful war with the Sith for a while."

Jordo nodded. "Sounds like….a fine idea to me…."

I knew where I stood on this dinner and conversation invite, I was the outsider, the Mandalorian, and I didn't belong to this party. I caught a look of pity from Phoenix's eyes and I shrugged at her, I didn't want her sympathy and I quietly slipped away.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Phoenix quietly went to change out of the Dark Jedi robes she had been wearing. Fortunately, Jordo didn't say anything about it. It could have been the fact that the black robes had turned gray with a fine layer of Tatooine dirt and dust seeping into them from the swoop bike she rode. She promised me that she wouldn't wear the Dark Jedi robes.

While I waited for Phoenix, Jordo said quietly, "How serious are you with her?"

"Enough to tell you...hands off, Jordo. She's mine."

Jordo chuckled lightly. "Seriously Onasi, I am married. Besides, she's a Jedi. I didn't think they…."

"They normally don't….but Phoenix doesn't care."

"Ahh, so she's in willful defiance with the Order. I hope that doesn't burn you, Onasi. The last Jedi who were in defiance with the Order…."

"Yea…we ended up with Revan and Malak but I know Phoenix and she isn't Revan or Malak. She's different. She's not like any of the other Jedi I've met. She...well she's human. She doesn't keep people at arm's length or act all snooty. I…."

"You love her…" Jordo added with a smile. "I know you took Morgana's death really hard, Carth. It's good to see...well it's good to see you met someone that makes you….well live again."

I nodded and sighed. "It's been a long time coming, Jordo. I felt like….well at one time I felt that falling for Phoenix was like betraying my wife and her memory. But…she opened me up and….she helped me feel love again."

I saw Phoenix return and my shoulders slumped, damn….not Jedi robes but smuggler's clothing. I thought well I thought the Jedi had gotten rid of her smuggler's clothing. However, this ship had at one point belonged to a crime lord, I could only surmise that Phoenix must have found similar clothing that looked exactly like the clothing she had worn on Taris. I couldn't say that was better than the Dark Jedi robes but at least it was a step in the right direction. I just wished Phoenix would not blame herself for her actions against the Sand People. There was a deep sadness and pain that seemed quiet and hidden within her. She thought she could hide it from me but she honestly couldn't. I may not have been a Jedi, but I could tell. She held herself close to me as if she was seeking me out as a balm to whatever was troubling her.

We walked out of the Hawk and went into the restaurant attached to the cantina. The restaurant looked pretty damn seedy. Phoenix said bemusedly, "I bet they have jawas cooking the food, Republic. Now that I would pay to see."

A waiter, a twi'lek came up to us to seat us at a table and said, "Actually our head chef is a paaerduag."

We all raised eyebrows and Phoenix chuckled. "Well they always say two heads are better than one and having two heads, means two tongues and two tongues means two sets of taste buds. I am sooo looking forward to this."

I groaned at Phoenix's wry humor, somehow I knew that Phoenix would find some way to be witty. I didn't begrudge her the humor this time because it meant that she was healing or trying to heal over her encounter with the Sand People.

I responded to her wit. "You may be looking forward to this….but if we end up with food poisoning I won't be laughing."

Phoenix grinned. "Cheer up, Republic I am a Force user….a Jedi…. after all and I think I can manage to cure upset stomachs if it comes to that."

I looked incredulously at Phoenix, at her thought that she could heal us from stomach distress. "You think!"

"Well I do have a holocron from a Jedi Master Healer so give me some credit, Carth."

We sat down at the table. Phoenix suddenly looked far away as if her mind was somewhere else. She had been like this a lot lately. She thought I didn't notice but there were times where she seemed to be far away and at times it looked like she was mumbling to herself. I knew better to disturb her when she got this way. She'd come out of it on her own. I figured that's what I got being attached to a Jedi that had visions of Dark Lords of the Sith, and was determined to face down Malak. Yea, there was definitely something the Jedi weren't telling Phoenix or even me for that matter.

Menus were placed before us and Phoenix snapped out of her introspection and looked over the menu. We all settled for bantha steaks with all the fixings and a few drinks. Although Phoenix surprised me by going for something non-alcoholic. I looked at her with a shocked expression and she sighed, "I've sworn off drinking, Carth. Are you really that surprised?"

I could have kissed her, it was wonderful news that Phoenix had given up some of her rather bad habits.

Jordo said, "So Miss...where are you from? Carth doesn't tell me anything about you, except that you're a Jedi. And you obviously have a sense of humor but other than that…."

"I am from Deralia. Really not much there….farms, colonies….kind of boring actually and not much to talk about either. And I take it you're from Telos…."

Phoenix had skipped over her past by a wide margin, but I figured she didn't want to go into the sad story she had over losing her family. I knew the feeling because I didn't want to tell her about how I felt over losing my wife and my son.

Jordo sighed. "Yea, Telos….unfortunately I haven't been home too much after what Revan and Malak did to it. I've been trying to get enough credits together to move Lydia, Serena, and Little Jordo away from Telos. We were thinking maybe Naboo or even Dantooine. Telos just isn't the same anymore. I know the Telosian council was trying to give all native Telosians a small remittance to keep native Telosians to stay on Citadel Station."

I nodded agreeing with Jordo and our food and drinks arrived. We proceeded to eat and I said. "So how is your family?"

"They are doing well considering that living on a space station is not ideal at all. Oh that reminds me….I was at Korriban doing a run for Czerka and I saw Dustil."

My jaw dropped and I nearly choked on my steak. "What? What did you say Jordo?"

"Dustil, I saw him on Korriban. I thought….well….I thought you knew."

I shook my head and I suddenly wasn't hungry. "No…..Jordo. Dustil has been missing and I always... I thought….well I thought he was dead. Are….are...you...sure...it was him?"

"Pretty sure….he's a dead ringer for you Carth. He didn't recognize me but …." Jordo paused a moment and he sighed. "I am sorry...we were supposed to be catching up on old times and not end up talking about this horrible war but…well…."

"Well what? I deserve to know what's going on with my son."

"He's joined the Sith, Carth. There's an academy there and well he was all gussied up like them and had a lightsaber and everything."

I felt like I had been sucker punched and my hands grasped hard upon the table. Phoenix's hands grasped mine and she said softly, "We'll go to Korriban, Carth. I promise. We will save your son from the Sith."

I felt so very numb that I felt like the dinner went by me in a haze.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Dinner died a slow painful death with the revelation that Carth's son was on Korriban. I gulped at the realization we would be headed to the planet of the Sith. A dark coldness filled me as I promised Carth we'd save his son from the Sith.

Although I had no clue how we were even going to manage to get into Korriban's academy. I didn't even know when we were going to get there. There were several other planets we had to go to aside from this dark and sinister planet. I took over the dinner conversation because Carth looked so far away and so pained.

I didn't even want to know what he was thinking. Perhaps he was reliving his wife's death, perhaps he was reliving his betrayal by Admrial Karath and the bombardment of his home. I felt heavy inside as if I was somehow responsible for the pain Carth was going through. My mouth felt dry and no amount of water took away the powdery dryness that existed. Jordo said softly. "I am sorry, Phoenix really I am. I also didn't want to impose but I heard the Republic are hiring on Manaan and I well….I burnt bridges with Czerka and I need a job. Well I was kind of hoping that Carth….well him being with the Republic fleet and all….plus I need a ride."

I sighed. "You're kind of putting us all in a bit of a pinch, Jordo. I am on a mission for the Order. You're in luck that Manaan is one of the planets we are headed to but I can't even guarantee that we will be heading there right off….nor can I promise Carth that we can go to Korriban right away either. Sure I want to….heck if I could….I would bend all the powers of creation and then some but….even Jedi need to know their limitations and there is only so much I can do."

I was beginning to understand that I had my own limitations and sure I could surpass them but there were consequences for such things. Surpassing limitations…required a supreme sacrifice. I had done so with the Sand People. I still had the feeling that I could bend the Force to my will and then some. Yet….I had to be careful, if I tried to bend the Force to my will it was possible the Force would try to bend me to its will. In the end, who was the master? Was it I or the Force? Such thoughts gave me a slight headache.

 _The Jedi and the Sith have been trying to figure out these things for ages, Phoenix._

Revan…what conclusion did you come to?

 _The philosophy of the Jedi is just as limiting as the philosophy of the Sith, Phoenix. You've seen some of my actions, some of my memories that I am rediscovering as well. I never believed in turning my back on the philosophy of the Jedi, nor turning my back on the philosophy of the Sith, either. If that makes me evil then so be it._

Revan's words were puzzling. But such philosophies of both Orders are contradictory and will lead to one extreme or the other.

 _Yes, they are extreme. The Force is extreme. Try and find balance if you can._

Balance….yes...I remembered, damn it Revan had manipulated me into becoming a Force Consular. She wanted me to be a balance maker.

You were a Jedi Guardian, weren't you, Revan?

 _Ahh...yes…yes….I remember now. I was a guardian. I prized my blue lightsaber. I...I lost it…._

You lost your lightsaber! You're as bad as Bastila. Where did you lose it?

 _I don't remember….Drom...Drom somewhere...no….I didn't lose it. I surrendered it. I think….I can't remember Phoenix. Please….don't bother me with such trivial questions._

I snorted, I would never surrender my lightsaber up. I would rather die.

Revan sighed. _Yes….perhaps... I think I surrendered it….I can't remember but if I did...Perhaps death would have been better. Perhaps I surrendered more than just my lightsaber. Perhaps I surrendered... or did I sacrifice my soul as well. Leave me alone, Phoenix. Leave me to my misery. Nothing has turned out like I planned. Nothing! The Force surely hates me!_

I don't know why but I felt kind of sorry for Revan. Was it wrong to feel such a way, but it sounded more like regret than anything else. Did Sith Lords feel regret? Well, apparently Revan did.

Jordo looked at me. "Phoenix?"

"Ehh….sorry….I was just contemplating our situation."

Jordo nodded. "I understand. Look I am not looking for a handout, Phoenix. But, I sacrificed my job with Czerka freeing wookiees and helping your friends out."

"We owe you for what you've done. I get that….and we will try and help you, Jordo. But I can't guarantee when we can help you." I sighed, "I still need to find….well we're on a mission to stop the Dark Lord Malak. So you can see our mission is so much more important than getting you to Manaan and even going to Korriban to find Carth's son. But we will do our best."

Jordo nodded. "I hear you, so it looks like I am going along with you for the ride."

I nodded. "Apparently so."

I squeezed Carth's hand, trying to get him to focus back on the moment. My heart ached for the man. He looked at me his features dazed, confused. I kissed him lightly on the forehead. "Come on my hairless wookiee, let's get back to the Hawk."

He nodded blandly and muttered, "He'd be a man now…."

I nodded, he was thinking about his son. "Or a boy in a man's body, Carth."

Carth sighed. "Yes….that's true...he still is a boy. Oh, Morgana….where did we go wrong? Our son….a Sith!"

Jordo said softly, "You're a good influence on him, Phoenix. I hope you two….well whatever the future brings you two...I hope it ends with you together."

"I've mucked things up, Jordo, badly. I wish I hadn't but I have. Yet I've made my course now and I am sticking with it. I love Carth and...well he needs me, just as badly as I need him."

* * *

A/N: Okay….next chapter for sure….Star Forge Map. *crosses fingers* I've got so many things going in so many directions but Tatooine is finally wrapping up. I am beginning to think the Ebon Hawk crew is damaged and I just happened to highlight it a lot. No wonder HK in KOTOR II said that his master traveled with whining simpering meatbags because they are all pretty beat up and damaged.

Oh and thanks Ether for mentioning that I forgot to have Griff ask Phoenix for credits. He still didn't ask...but I fixed it so that it makes more sense.


	57. Ch56:Tatooine: The Mirror has Two Faces

**Chapter 56: Tatooine: The Mirror Has Two Faces** **  
**

 **~Phoenix~**

 _The krayt dragon came…drawn to the call that was given…_

 _Revan was quietly positioned on the dunes as she called forth the dragon._

 _::Come to me…come to me…_

 _The dragon came willingly to Revan's call._

 _:: Obey me…_

 _The dragon roared out in defiance._

 _Revan chuckled lightly and soothed her voice into a calm peaceful tone.::I understand...you are your own master but…I know creatures like you.::_

 _The dragon seemed to settle down some, and Revan drew closer and she carefully extended a hand and patted the dragon. You are like the drexl on Onderon…dragon. You are no different to me. I will tame you to serve me.::_

 _The dragon suddenly snapped at Revan. Revan jumped away sensing the danger before the dragon could grab her by the arm and swallow her. She laughed. "You remind me of my apprentice, Malak. I will call you Mal. I doubt he would find that amusing. He has no sense of humor at all."_

 _The dragon roared charging after Revan. Raising her hand, Revan caused the dragon to be frozen within the Force itself and the dragon was ensnared by Revan's will and Revan's will alone. Revan cautiously approached. She once again carefully petted the dragon. "Attack me again, Mal and I will wipe your mind. I would prefer that I didn't have to do that…I feel your spirit, your will…it is strong. I like it. It reminds me…well of myself, actually."_

 _She carefully managed to hoist herself up on the dragon and kicked it. It bellowed, and Revan chuckled "My ancestors are mighty beast riders…come Mal….I will take you to a place you will like. It will suit your nature…"_

I shuddered as Bastila and I headed out to the Dune Sea. "Did you see the vision?"

She nodded. "I did. So it would seem Revan called forth the krayt dragon to protect the Star Map."

"Do you think she suspected that…well that the Jedi might follow her tracks?"

Bastila nodded. "Taming a krayt dragon and riding on its back would take a great deal of effort, Phoenix. However, someone like Revan…..well…perhaps such a task was not beyond her measure or skill. Yes, I think she had some inkling that we would be following her path or at least someone would be."

"So…should we be expecting more resistance from the Sith on this, Bastila?"

"Possibly…although I should like to think that we've encountered all that we are going to at the moment here. I don't think we will find others in our path at least not now."

I nodded. "Bastila…there's something I have meant to ask you and since the others are back on the ship and we are doing this together on our own without…too much interruption... but…I…well..."

Bastila cringed, and I frowned. "What I haven't even asked you yet."

"Yes, but we are bonded, Phoenix and I can sense the query before you even ask it. As for the answer, I have no idea how we both know the song that our fathers sang. Perhaps it was a popular song that both our fathers knew."

I frowned. "I hate to say this…Bastila but when I picture my father…and mother…well they look a bit oddly like yours."

"That is indeed strange, Phoenix but…perhaps your memories of your father and mother are faded with time and you are only latching onto a father and mother figure. To be truthful I haven't seen my father since…well since you lashed out at the Sand People. I miss him terribly, and it's hard to continue on this mission…knowing he is no longer alive."

I wanted to embrace Bastila as a lover, and her pain felt just as agonizing as Carth's. Yet I resisted that urge and I laid a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it sympathetically, "I know. I felt the same when I came back home to my family and they were all dead. At least you have your mother."

Bastila nodded. "Yes…and I did promise I'd see her after this mission is over. She's dying Phoenix."

I sighed. "Maybe…well maybe we can get Master Jax to help her."

"Perhaps…but all life ends eventually Phoenix. There is no death…only the Force."

I mulled that over. "You don't sound fully convinced on that, Bastila."

Bastila sighed. "Death is painful…Phoenix. I dislike the pain of losing people I love or care for."

"Well…life is painful. Yet...if you believe in the Jedi code, Bastila then your father is still alive in some sense…he lives on in the Force, perhaps on a level that we cannot reach or understand. Perhaps my own family is there as well, part of the Force. Their presence sustains us…and guides us."

Bastila looked thoughtful. "Yes…I suppose you are right. You know I am beginning to think I've made a terrible mistake."

"A mistake?"

"Yes…coming on this mission. I seem so woefully inadequate to help guide you in the Force. You seem…"She paused a moment."Well Phoenix, you seem to have grown in an understanding of the Force in spite of my foolish errors and pride."

I shook my head. "I am not perfect either Bastila. Foolish errors…pride. I think we both have a good deal of that. Plus…well our entanglements we have had with each other."

"I feel at fault…for that."

I shook my head. "Well, it takes two to…" I paused and then continued. "It is my own fault as much as yours. Perhaps our bond is pushing us towards a romantic entanglement but…really Bastila to be truthful…well….I…"

"You prefer guys…and you pursuing such a course with me was…well….not the norm for you, nor was it for me. I understand that as well. Perhaps that is why such a relationship was doomed to not work out with either one of us. To be truthful I feel the same as you. I…well…I feel attachments towards…well…towards guys as well. So feeling something for you…was…well... I suppose unique. However, this is probably why our relationship such as it was…was doomed to fail…aside from the whole forbidden relationships mantra by the Jedi."

I rolled my eyes. "Forbidden…yea…I've done some study on the Order when we were on Dantooine…how exactly was Nomi Sundrider able to be married to a Jedi Knight and have a child? If such things are forbidden."

Bastila sighed. "And…the Order learned that such relationships can lead to the Dark Side."

"Can lead…it doesn't always mean such relationships do, Bastila. Course…I think ours…well…sadly I think we aren't cut out for it. Plus I am not entirely sure we…were….well….if what I thought was love...was love or just a very intense case of infatuation."

Bastila said nothing but she did nod in agreement and we continued our journey towards the cave. As we neared it, I nearly gagged. I smelled the rancid smell of dead bantha and their bones, as well as others, littered the ground around us. "Ugh…yep, we're here…..so…how are we going to get past this damn thing? Revan really threw a hydrospanner in the works by putting this damn lizard here."

 **~Bastila~**

How could I get Revan to call forth the krayt dragon without her suspecting she was Revan in the first place? It would be easy if Revan knew she was Revan. She could call forth the beast and probably scratch its ears like it was a pet dog.

Yet I was, and I wasn't dealing with Revan. I suddenly heard a cry from somewhere in the desert and saw a twi'lek coming forward and speaking in Ryl. "Wait…stop…the krayt dragon will eat you both or worse will happen without my guidance."

I frowned. "Who are you?"

The twi'lek came forward. "My name is Komad…I've been attempt to hunt this dragon for the longest but...all my hunting partners are foolish. My last one, a rodian named Grava wanted the dragon pearls to get off this planet. Apparently, he angered a Jedi, I was willing to oblige him because something has to be done about this dragon. The dragon is having a hard time finding bantha and will soon draw closer to more sentient prey. Grava grew impatient…his bones are somewhere within the cave."

Phoenix grinned. "Couldn't have happened to a nicer fellow…really."

I shook my head. "Phoenix….it is in poor taste to relish the death of an enemy."

She glared at me. "Yea…remind me to tell you that when he drugs you and sells you off to a Sith-hired bounty hunter. You can keep your noble Jedi sentiment to yourself."

"It troubles me that you feel this way, Phoenix."

Phoenix snorted. "Yea…well…I am not going to be indifferent to the fact that that damn rodian tried to have me indirectly killed. He's dead and good riddance."

I sighed, I couldn't argue with Phoenix. It's just that her feelings echoed through our bond and it unsettled me that she felt some sort of satisfaction at the rodian's death. Yet…part of me…felt some agreement with her sentiment. I gulped inwardly, how I wish the bond we had could be broken.

Komad raised an eyebrow. "You're the Jedi; he angered?"

Phoenix nodded. "Yea…I've been looking for him; he sold me out to a bounty hunter hired by the Sith, but…seems like the krayt dragon saved me the trouble."

Komad nodded. "Well, it seems that in the end, the cycle of life and death plays out. I have no wish to anger you sentient over what grudge you had with the rodian but I need your help."

Phoenix held out her palms in a non-threatening manner and her sentiment against Grava suddenly floated away. How Phoenix could be so un-Jedi like one moment and the next so very Jedi like puzzled me. Yet maybe it shouldn't have puzzled me, this was Revan after all. Deep down inside, Phoenix was Revan there was no escaping that. Sometimes I think I saw Knight Revan rather than Phoenix.

She spoke, "I have no grudge against you, Komad. We need each other to get past the krayt dragon and it seems you have a method in getting rid of it. So tell me what we must do to get past the dragon and we will do it."

Komad nodded. "I have placed mines carefully near the mouth of the cave. Yet…that is only part of my plan."

Phoenix sighed. "Why am I sensing this isn't going to be easy?"

He said calmly, "It isn't, you see the krayt rely eating exclusively on bantha…"

"But there are dead bantha all over this place."

"Yes...or luckless and impatient hunters."

Phoenix's eyes went wide. "You want me to be bait for the krayt dragon...you've got to be crazy, Komad. I thought that's how Grava met his end."

Komad sighed. "It took me some time to purchase the mines and place them in strategic places, as well as connect them to a detonator. Grava could not wait. He went charging right into the cave. This krayt has gotten bigger over time eating countless bantha. For some reason….it seems to like this cave. It doesn't stray too far from it. It's as if…"

I responded, "Compelled to stay here…" I sighed, it was obvious that Revan had urged the beast to stay here. Perhaps Komad's desire to use Phoenix as bait might work to bring forth Revan's dormant persona. I hated to use Phoenix/Revan in such a manner, but it was Revan who brought the krayt to the cave. Therefore, it was indirectly Revan's responsibility to get rid of the dragon in the first place.

Komad sighed. "Yes….it seems that way…but it won't stay here too long if it doesn't get a supply of food. As driven as this dragon maybe to stay in this cave its predatory instincts will eventually get the best of it and it will wander closer to civilization for food. This is why we must lure the creature out. There are no more bantha to lure it out…so sadly…"

Phoenix interjected, "I may be reckless, but I am not that reckless…I am not going to be the equivalent of bantha on a stick."

Komad looked at Phoenix with pleading eyes. "But you are a Jedi, surely you must understand the risk to sentient life if this dragon is not eliminated."

I nodded. "The twi'lek is right, Phoenix."

Phoenix muttered,"Why don't you go, You spoiled Jedi princess?!"

I cringed, I hated being called a princess and Phoenix knew it. She was being quite hostile to me and gave me a glare that looked angry that I was forcing her into the cave.

"I would but…I am important to the Republic war effort if I…"

"Oh yea, bring in your flaunted battle meditation into this. Frack…" She sighed. "And what happens if I die…did that ever occur to you, Bastila?"

I shivered. How could I put Revan in danger like this? I had saved her on her ship and here I was basically telling her to put her life on the line. "Phoenix…I trust in your abilities. Battle meditation isn't going to help against a krayt dragon. If it makes you feel better…I will go with you in order to lure out the dragon."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

There was something fracked up about this. What the hell was Bastila doing basically forcing me to go into a dragon's lair? I got the impression she wasn't telling me the whole reason as to why she wanted me to go. She was hiding shit from me, again! Like Revan being a woman. So yea, of course, I was a bit antagonistic towards her. If she wasn't being truthful about Revan being a woman then what else was she hiding from me?

I raised an eyebrow at Bastila finally agreeing to go with me as bait to the dragon lair. I sighed. I cared about Bastila, despite the fact she seemed to be hiding things from me. Relationship or not...we were tied closely for obvious reasons. What kind of fracked up relationship did we have? She wasn't telling me everything, and I could feel it through our bond. Did I even want her by my side?

I sighed. "Never mind…Bastila. I'll do it. The Republic needs you for your fracking battle meditation. I wouldn't want you to Force-forbid break a nail."

Bastila cringed, and I rather felt bad I had chastised her in such a manner. I took a breath and turned to Komad. "Okay…so I assume I run up to the cave and hope by the Force I don't get…consumed by the dragon. "

Komad nodded. "Yes...but do not stay put for too long…I will be detonating the mines as soon as you are clear."

"Yea and krayt dragons are pretty fast. I hope…I don't get eaten or blown up or both."

Komad stated calmly, "It is not my intention to have either happen to you, Jedi. I am sorry, I just wish there were bantha for you to lure the dragon out."

I shook my head and went slowly forward to the cave. This was madness. I wondered how Revan managed to control the damn thing. I walked forward to the cave and…darkness…

 **~Bastila~**

I watched as Phoenix walked calmly towards the dragon's cave. I heard her voice call out in a firm menacing tone. "Mal…"

I shivered, there was coldness in the name that Phoenix spoke. The dragon came out of the cave and Phoenix laughed lightly. "Good, Mal…now follow me!"

Phoenix then turned and ran, the dragon followed in hot pursuit and Komad pushed the button on the detonator and the mines went off. Phoenix managed to clear the blast and the dragon shrieked in pain as it was caught in the blast of the mines.

Phoenix stood in the distance, catching her breath. I went over to her, and she simply stood there, her eyes cold and inky black. If I stared too deeply into them, they looked like two empty pools filled with darkness. I laid a hand on her shoulder. She suddenly gasped and her dark black eyes shined with their normal light. She looked slightly addled. "Bastila? What? What happened?I remember walking toward the cave and…I can't remember what happened. I must have blacked out."

I didn't want to think too hard about what had happened. Yet the dragon was dead. If what had happened then…I inwardly gulped, this was not good…not good at all.

I said firmly to Phoenix, "Don't think too hard about it, Phoenix. The dragon is dead. I think you were deep in a meditative trance. I get in such a way when I am focused in my battle meditation. You survived, and the Force was with you."

Phoenix sighed. "I don't know…I felt so cold as if I couldn't move, but that's obviously not true now, is it?"

"I told you, don't think too hard about it, Phoenix. The dragon is dead, and we can continue our quest for the Star Forge."

Komad came over, his hands were covered in dragon guts and slime and he said firmly. "Here…here is your share of the hunt, Jedi."

He attempted to hand Phoenix, a shiny and glistening spheroid object that I deduced was a dragon pearl.

Phoenix looked sick. "I...I don't really want it."

Komad shook his head. "Take it. You risked your life for this."

Phoenix bit her lips, and she bit them hard, the blood suddenly came from her lips. She wiped it away with her hand. "Alright…I'll take the damn pearl. Spoils from the hunt, right?"

Komad nodded. "Yes…but regrettably this does not feel right to me as well. I feel shame over this hunt. Yet…this had to be done, Jedi."He handed the pearl to Phoenix, and she took it.

"Don't let the spoils be your only reason to hunt. Wealth fades. The sands remain."

Phoenix nodded. "That is true. Thank you, Komad."

He bowed respectfully before us and then he carefully cleaned his hands in the sand and then wandered back toward Anchorhead.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

What the kriffing hell happened? I wasn't in control of my own body. I heard a laugh from me. Damn it, now Revan was controlling my body. That was fracked up!

 _You want to die, Phoenix?_

No, but I don't want a fracking Sith Lord taking control of my body either!

 _Well only I could handle that monster, Phoenix. So shut up and be happy I helped you out of that mess. Even Bastila knew that only I could do this._

You never gave me a chance to even try and do it. You just fracking took control of my body. I could do this on my own. I took care of things on Taris, I defeated Bendak Starkiller. I, Phoenix Star.

 _Did you? Did you really, Phoenix? I was there, and you would have died without me. And I thought Jedi didn't brag._

You are a really annoying, evil bitch, did you know that?

 _Coming from you that is a compliment._

Geeze…and I thought I was sarcastic.

"Phoenix, are you alright?"

I turned. "Sorry, Bastila...I am tired. I promised Carth I would rest. I mean a really proper rest, and I haven't exactly been able to do so."

"Hmm, that might explain your black out with the krayt dragon. You passed out after your confrontation with Bendak. This black out is more than likely pure physical exhaustion. When we get done with finding the map, I want you to rest, Phoenix. No Force meditation, pure and simple rest. There is only so much time a Jedi can go without proper rest and I am thinking the strain is beginning to show."

I nodded. That probably explained how Revan was able to take control of me. I was too weak to keep her from asserting herself. "I agree, Bastila…let's get this map and let's get back to the Hawk."

We wandered into the cave, and I frowned. The cave was dark and ominous in nature in the middle of the room, a big, massive Sith Holocron stood and pulsed with a dark aura.

I touched it lightly with the Force and it opened, revealing Revan in mask and dark robes and she spoke, her voice being altered and filtered through the mask.

Bastila paled, and I stood firm looking at Revan. She really didn't seem as daunting as I thought she did. What made Bastila cower? She had faced Revan and defeated her...well Malak defeated her but still why would a dead disembodied Sith displayed by a holocron cause Bastila fear?

"Ahh, Jedi…I see you have made it past my little trial."

"Trap, you mean," I said with a firm voice.

"Trial, trap….same thing. For a Jedi, you are rather defiant. I rather like your spirit, Jedi. Perhaps you are worthy of the Star Forge after all."

I snorted. "The Star Map, Revan."

"Now...now…don't be hasty…Jedi. You apparently defeated my little pet. But your trial is not over, Jedi. The Builders built their own trials as well. In order to claim the Star Map, you must prove yourself. No doubt you proved yourself to be able to get this far. You… will have to..."Revan paused and then folded up her arms in a haughty manner and said, "Well that would be spoiling my fun."

"Fun! What…more droids?"

Revan laughed. "Don't be absurd. Those droids were crude. The Builders not only had droids;They had slaves. Slaves that they manipulated and twisted towards their will. But that is for you to find out on your own, Jedi. Now go...prove to me that you are worthy. If you are, perhaps we will meet again."

The holocron then switched off.

I looked at Bastila and shook my head. "That was…unsettling."

She nodded. "I agree, I… I didn't think I'd see Revan like this…after…after her death."

"Bastila pull yourself together. That's not Revan; it's a holocron with a semblance of her consciousness. Like Master Jax's smaller holocron unit. Holocrons are nothing more than a computer with a semblance of consciousness added to it. Yea, the real Revan may have responded similarly but…"

Bastila sighed. "I know…Phoenix. Perhaps I…well…Revan is enough to unsettle anyone and I dislike how she responded to you."

"I suppose…well I suppose we better get moving and find out what exactly these "slaves" are that Revan is talking about."

"I don't see how there would be any slaves, Phoenix. The Builders…well...twenty thousand years old…that seems well...they would be dead."

"You think Revan may have been lying?"

"A Sith doesn't exactly inspire honesty, Phoenix."

Considering how Revan's disembodied spirit was towards me, I slightly agreed with Bastila.

"Tell the truth but tell it slant…"

"What?"

"Revan may have been telling the truth but…she may have bent it to her own version of the truth. Or she was playing with us. Anyway...let's get going."

We walked on through the cave. It looked like it had been heavily mined and quarried from different sides of the cave. I wasn't quite sure where Czerka had started mining but the abandoned equipment and bones with teeth marks all over them told a story. Czerka dug and agitated the krayt dragon which then went through these tunnels and started eating the Czerka miners.

Somehow, we didn't end up lost in a maze of tunnels. Bastila let me take the lead as we went through the tunnels. I could feel the air hitting my face and the bright sunlight of the two suns of Tatooine hitting us towards the end of the tunnels. The tunnels gave way to a grand temple of white polished granite. This place was a monument of power and authority. Amphibian type creatures loomed over us their hands extended towards the heavens. These creatures looked ready to call upon doom or warning on those who entered their inner sanctum. They looked pretty darn arrogant as if they thought themselves as gods.

"These must be the fabled builders, Bastila. I don't recognize them as any species in the Republic or the Rim either. This probably means the Star Forge is in the unknown regions."

"That is as sound a theory as any. Unfortunately, we need the Star Maps to be able to get accurate coordinates to the Star Forge, otherwise, we could be going in several differing directions and miss the Star Forge altogether."

I nodded. In the middle of the temple, I saw it, the Star Map. It was extended over a bridge and I gulped as I saw alien tentacles draped all over the bridge. I looked down into the abyss from one side of the bridge to see the gaping maw, teeth, and beak of a sarlacc. A slave that could be over twenty thousand years old and it all began to make sense. This thing must have been as old as the temple and the empire its founders had made. Sarlaccs could end up living over twenty thousand years. It looked pretty massive.

I wondered how Revan managed to get across the bridge without getting dragged into the pit by the sarlacc. Unless Revan didn't taste good and the sarlacc spat her out. Although Revan seemed to have a gift or perhaps a talent within the Force with creatures and she managed to charm the damn dragon. I figured that calming a sarlacc did not seem so far fetched. However, I was at loss on how exactly Revan could do it. I hated animals. I had a damn whisperkit that bit and scratched me as a kid. So trying to tame and charm animals seemed unlikely to me.

Revan can you help me out here?

 _Forget it, Jedi!_

What?!

 _You heard me, Jedi. I helped you out with the krayt dragon and you were upset at me for that…so figure it out yourself…Ms. Phoenix Lynn Star!_

Fine, I don't need you, Revan.

Revan laughed. _L_ _ _iar…__

I sighed and paced back and forth trying to think of a way to get past the sarlacc. Bastila looked pretty glum. She sat down and looked…well, she looked like she was going to cry. We had come all this way and to be stopped by a damn sarlacc. I kept pacing back and forth as the pacing helped me think and contemplate and then something nudged at my brain.

"Bastila…I think I saw some explosives that Czerka left when they were mining. I've got some skill with that sort of thing, as I was a weapons smuggler."

"Do you think explosives will work against a sarlacc?"

"I don't know. I've never used explosives on a sarlacc before but the stronger the better. The strongest explosive I know of is a pemacrete detonator. It's a long shot but I bet Czerka used them in their mining ops."

"How are you going to set it off, Phoenix? I doubt a sarlacc is going to let you set a detonator in its maw."

I sighed. "That's a good question…wait a minute I have an idea."

 **~A couple of hours later~**

Statement: Is there something you want killed, master?"

"Well…" I paused. I had commed the droid to our area and being the homicidal droid that he was, he came. I certainly hoped he didn't kill anything on his way here. I didn't even get a chance to answer and HK responded.

Overjoyed query: Wonderful master, who do you wish me to kill?

"See that sarlacc, I want you to shoot at it, I need you to distract it as best as you are able."

Incredulous statement: But master I must protest…when I asked you if you wished something killed I didn't think you'd ask me to try and go after a sarlacc.

I shook my head incredulously. "What's this a fussy assassin droid? I didn't think you were particular about your targets, HK."

Statement: On the contrary master, I am very particular about who I kill, master, particularly if it results in my own termination.

"You and me both HK. Anyway, I need you to distract the sarlacc while I attempt to plant this detonator on it. You get to protect me, HK. So bonus points for you."

Resigned Statement: I never asked to sign up for a suicide mission, master. But if this is what you are requesting I will follow your commands master."

I smiled. "Good…devotion from a droid is a commendable thing, HK. Anyway, let's get going."

Bastila looked at me, sheer worry in her eyes. "Phoenix, please be careful."

I snorted. "You sure didn't say that when you sent me after the krayt dragon. You wanted me to risk my life. I don't get it. Is this for saying it's over between us? Is this some sort of test? A test that I am loyal to the Jedi Order because if it is…"

Bastila shook her head. "Phoenix, I am not hiding anything from you. You are strong in the Force; your natural affinity makes you the perfect one to do this. This isn't the right time to talk about this...we need that Star Map."

I shook my head at the non-answer. "Fine…Star Map. But I don't like being led like a nerf to a slaughter house."

I stormed off with the permcrete detonator in hand.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I honestly didn't know what to make of Phoenix, it was getting harder to hide things from her that was obvious. I sighed, whatever relationship we had was obliterated by what happened at the cave. I had pushed Phoenix too hard so hard that I caused Revan to emerge from her. I watched as HK blasted away at the sarlacc. It kept reaching tentacles at the droid and with the precision that only an assassin possessed, HK shot and killed those tentacles. Meanwhile, Phoenix held onto the detonator and using the Force she floated the detonator into the maw of the sarlacc. The sarlacc swallowed it whole.

She grinned. "Okay Hk let's get out of here."

HK retreated, and Phoenix pushed a button on the remote detonator she set up and a rumbling noise was heard. The sarlacc screamed in sudden pain and an explosion occurred. The sarlacc's tentacles and muck came thrown upward and we all ended up coated in sarlacc guts.

Phoenix suddenly laughed, it wasn't the dark laugh that she had with the krayt dragon but an amused laugh at being covered in guts.

"I hardly find this funny, Phoenix."

"Sure it is, seeing us all covered in sarlacc slime is well…considering all that we've been through…as well as what we've been through on Taris. I consider being covered in monster muck a real irony. If that's the worse we have to deal with on this mission than the Force has been kind to us."

HK suddenly chimed in. Statement: Master, your humor leaves a lot to be desired. You do realize you will be cleaning my circuitry for hours perhaps days on end.

Phoenix sighed. "What's with people with no sense of humor?" She sighed. "Come on you two, let's get that Star Map and get out of here."

Phoenix carefully nudged the Star Map with the Force and it opened up and I downloaded the map to our datapad. Our quest on Tatooine was finally over.

* * *

A/N: And sorry this took so long to write. I've had a lot going on plus writer's block. Thanks go to Ether for the ideas on Revan/Phoenix construct. Oh and I owe the whole "Evil Bitch" title from Ether's story Identities of a Lost Soul.

This chapter is based on cut content from Kotor I. There was a temple on Tatooine and there are pictures of it I've seen from a mod. I've never installed it because it is more of a modders resources and there really wasn't enough source material to make a mod for it and I don't dabble in mods I only play them. However, there was a rumor that your pc ended up facing a sarlacc and had to try and kill it to get to the Star Map. So…this chapter is me trying to write in cut content. Trying to figure out how to kill it well that took some time as well. Anyway, happy readings…and on to the next Star Map.


	58. Chapter 57:Ebon Hawk:Asserted Authority

**Chapter 57: Ebon Hawk: Asserted Authority**

 **~Phoenix~**

"Do you want to talk?"

"Talk…talk about what? The only thing I want to do right now is find Dustil. If he's alive... well, there's just nothing else I want to think about. I'll understand if we can't look for him right now, but if we could it would be a huge load off my mind."

I sighed, I had been covered in sarlacc muck. I was tired, I was exhausted, the damn fresher was often filled with wookiees and wookiee hair. So a bath in the fresher was not as pleasant as it should have been. I didn't even want to ask what the frack was going on with that. I promised Carth I would rest. "Rest with me…Republic."

He shook his head, and I said softly. "Look we don't have to…well…you know."

A light grin appeared on my tired features. I was too tired to even think of, love making. I just wanted him close by me. I grasped his hand, and we ended up in the pilot's private bunk room. In the end, we were both in the bunk and he hugged onto me. My eyes closed, and I felt secure in Carth's arms.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Nestled against Phoenix, the warmth of her body felt comfortable and soothing next to mine. I couldn't sleep, I kept thinking about Dustil, but Phoenix was tired and her body relaxed next to me. There was something comforting having her next to me. I found myself looking at her unclothed body in detail. I frowned as I looked at the various scars that she had down her back as well as a few that I saw on her shoulders. I then noticed a scar that seemed to run along the base of her head. It looked pretty new. I carefully traced the scar with my finger, and it seemed to run from the base of her skull, into her hair and I couldn't trace it any further. I wondered where she had gotten hurt like that. Not all scars could fade from kolto that was true. It looked like a head wound. I remember learning some triage during the Mandalorian wars. While I was no medic, I learned under Admiral Karath's guidance on how to treat wounded that might not have access to kolto. Some of those scars looked old, like scars from combat.

Where did Phoenix get combat scars like that? To be perfectly honest I was too busy making love with her earlier to gave much thought about Phoenix's physical appearance. Laying next to her I traced the scars, some of them looked jagged and possibly treated without kolto. Phoenix sighed and then her body shifted and her face was pressed against my chest. She was sure a restless individual when she slept. I wanted to sleep but all I could think of was Dustil. She must have revived some because she muttered in a half asleep, half awake voice,"Republic….you need to sleep too. You'll be no good to Dustil if you're half dead."

She was right. I nestled against her and closed my eyes as well but I shifted a bit restlessly as well. The next thing I knew was Phoenix's hand lightly massaging my scalp. Her voice said softly and echoed through me. "Sleep…Republic…Sleep…"

I suddenly yawned feeling sleepy. "Phoenix...stop that…no using the Force!"

"Sleep...we both need to sleep…"

I yawned again, and I found myself unable to resist Phoenix's compulsion. I chuckled lightly. "You are in so much trouble….my little Raven."

She yawned as well. "What!" She paused, "You've got to be kidding me...I…I used it on both of us."She kissed me deeply on my lips and then suddenly started snoring heavily.

My eyes shut closed, and I felt myself floating away…

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"Canderous can you pilot a ship?"

The Mandalorian looked at me incredulously. "We should wait for Carth and…Akume."

I flinched at the name Canderous gave, and he glared at me. "You still haven't told her the truth, have you?"

"That's my responsibility, Mandalorian. Besides...she's comfortable being called Phoenix."

"But it's not her name."

"But you don't understand, Mandalorian. She believes she is Phoenix. If you strip away that belief…"I paused and then stated, "her mind is damaged, Canderous. Think about it…if she was to know…"I paused."No, the council is right, she can't know. It could ruin whatever mission we have against Malak."

"You mean your precious Order and the Republic's mission. I have no great love for either Bastila."

"Then why are you here?"

"Because I see something about Akume…or Phoenix, that I like. She's a warrior; she might be damaged but...Hell with it. I intend to…"He paused and frowned."Damn it, now I am sounding like that damn Republic grunt. I intend to keep her safe, even from you, if I have to."

I looked incredulously at him; this was Revan's influence no doubt. She had the ability to rally allies to her cause and to create loyalty among them. Maybe she didn't realize it. Perhaps it wasn't I who formed the bond with Revan, perhaps it was Revan who formed the bond with me. It hadn't dawned on me that Revan's ability to rally people to her cause was a form of Force bonding. Perhaps that was why Liam Mandrell followed Revan, why Malak followed Revan, why many Jedi followed Revan. Yet, none of the Masters had ever assumed that Revan had this power of forming such powerful bonds. They always said that about Liam. Yet...maybe that was how Liam and Revan were strong lovers, they were double bonded.

"Canderous, please try and look at the view point of a mind damaged warrior. Your people would kill them, yes?"

Canderous nodded.

"You admire Phoenix…if telling her the truth damages her further…and makes her unfit as a warrior. How far does that admiration go, Canderous? Do you want to perform that killing blow? Could you?"

I watched as Canderous stroked the stubble of his beard and he sighed. "Fine…you made your point, Bastila. I won't tell her. But if she does find out and asks me…I won't lie to her. She deserves the truth."

"We need to head for Kashyyyk, Canderous and…well, Carth and Phoenix are out of commission. I don't know about you…but we need to get these wookiees off the Hawk. They will eat up all our supplies, although they have been helpful in clearing out the gizka. Plus the fact; they have weapons now to take on Czerka but It's obvious that Kashyyyk is where we need to head."

"No arguments from me on that, Princess. Although we should gather the crew before we make that decision. I believe that Calrissian fellow wants to go to Manaan and we all know where Carth wants to head."

I groaned. I knew where Carth wanted to go, I knew his son was important to him and by extension, Phoenix would probably want to go to Korriban, but going to Korriban was out of the question. Phoenix was very susceptible to the Dark Side. I vowed that I would keep Revan away from Korriban till it was absolutely necessary. This meant keeping Phoenix/Revan away from that horrible Dark Side corrupted planet at all costs. Carth might hate me for it, but I was not going to let Revan slip back into old familiar paths. Yes, eventually, we would end up on Korriban but Phoenix needed more time to recover from her slip on Tatooine.

"We are going to Kashyyyk, Mandalorian."

Canderous shook his head and snorted. "I don't do mutiny…Princess. I believe Phoenix is…"

I snorted. "She's not in charge here. I am. The Order left me in charge of this mission and I say we head to Kashyyyk."

Canderous looked a bit taken back at my forcefulness. "I thought that as a Jedi you would be well…I don't know… be more into to the democratic process. But I can understand your desire to get moving and sometimes democracy is…cumbersome. Very well…I'll pilot the ship to Kashyyyk."

"Normally…Canderous…I'd follow the will of the crew...but Phoenix's mind is muddled with her attachment to Carth. Jordo wasn't assigned to us. His voice doesn't really count, he's more a passenger than a member of our crew, Canderous. This isn't mutiny, Canderous. This mission is mine. I was left in charge. The Order placed me in command of this mission and as the commanding Jedi in charge, I say we go to Kashyyyk. I order you to take control of the ship and pilot us to Kashyyyk."

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I looked dumbfounded at Bastila. "You don't have to justify your actions to me, Bastila. I am Mandalorian. I followed the orders of Clan Ordo and then the orders of Mandalore. You don't have to tell me your reasoning. You need to follow through with your actions without hesitation and without fear, those are the actions of a true warrior as well as the actions of your Jedi Revan."

Bastila suddenly paled at the mention of Revan and took off like a shot. Bastila was a pure enigma. I didn't know what to make of her. One moment she was the proper and prim Jedi, and the next she seemed to be demanding that we follow her orders as leader of the mission. Phoenix was right, something about Revan always seemed to rattle the padawan. I chuckled a bit as she took off.

Her logic was pretty sound as it was, we couldn't afford to have these damn wookiees around much longer. It was bad enough having Zaalbar around but one wookiee was tolerable. Over twenty was far too much. I passed by Juhani and glared at her. This was all her doing; the ship was cramped with hairy carpet bags because of her actions.

"Well, Wild Cat…we're headed for Kashyyyk. No arguments on this. This ship is too damn cramped for its own good."

Juhani nodded. "I will not argue with this, Mandalorian. This ship is getting too crowded even for me. However, I think it would be best to wait for Phoenix and Carth's input on this."

I snorted. "Yea, except they are currently occupied."

Juhani nodded. "Yes, those two are very much tied together."

I raised an eyebrow. "No philosophical comments about how this is wrong?" Not that I really cared what Jedi did when their masters weren't looking. However, I found it interesting that the Cathar didn't seem overly concerned.

Juhani shrugged. "It is what it is, Mandalorian and even Bastila is coming to terms to what is happening as well. Plus, I know it is not wise to cross Phoenix. I have noticed that she is a very fiery woman; she matches her name very well. Sometimes I wonder if she is part Cathar."

I chuckled. "That's true, I've learned one thing, Wild Cat. You don't mess with any man or any woman when it comes to their relationships. Not that it matters to me but the Jedi really ought to butt out of the relationship business. It's not healthy, for any of them. Biologically, sentients are meant to mate and have children. It's part of life itself. You Jedi talk about how the Force is part of life and then you spend the better part of that time denying it by not participating in that process. No wonder my people couldn't stomach you. The only one I had any decent amount of respect for was Revan. Well, I have respect for Phoenix; she's pretty plucky for a Jedi."

"She is a padawan, Mandalorian. As am, I. And you speak in such crude terms. Yet…there is a certain truth to your logic. I do not agree with the Order's concept regarding relationships. I…" Juhani paused.

I laughed. "You're involved with someone, aren't you?"

Juhani nodded. "Two…err...one now. I...well…relationships are complicated, Mandalorian and I rather not talk about them."

I shook my head. "You seem as complicated as Phoenix…and don't tell me you don't know about her and Bastila either."

Juhani nodded. "I…was aware of such things. Bastila carried Phoenix's scent among her. For a time, their scents seemed very much the same. So yes, I knew those two…mated with each other as well. Yet, it is not my place to get involved in people's relationships."

"You are a puzzlement, Juhani. For a Jedi…of course."

"As are you, Manda…Canderous. I still don't like you."

I laughed. "No…I suspect you don't. And to be fair…I don't like you either."

Juhani shrugged and then wandered off. The fur ball kitten was just as mixed up as the Jedi Princess. However, Juhani was not quite a damn Jedi idealogue like Bastila. I wandered up to the cockpit and there was Bastila. She looked impatient and petulant. "It is about time you got here, what held you up?"

"Juhani. She agrees with you by the way about heading to Kashyyyk."

Bastila nodded. "I see…well…then have a seat, Mandalorian and let's go."

I frowned, what was motivating Bastila to push hard on this. "Now wait a minute…Jedi Princess, what * **exactly** * is the rush? You seem pretty damn insistent on getting us moving poste-haste."

Bastila sighed. "I am only insistent on the fact that we can't have the wookiees eat us out of all our supplies, Mandalorian."

I rolled my eyes. I doubted that; although part of it may have been the wookiees on the Ebon Hawk. Going over Phoenix's head seemed like well…a bad idea. I knew Phoenix, and more than likely she and Carth would probably pitch a fit after they woke up and found out that we had ended up heading towards Kashyyyk without discussing it with them.

"Yea, sure sister. Whatever you say. I don't believe you."

"Fine. Mandalorian, believe me, don't believe me. I don't honestly care. What I do care is that we need to get on our way to find the Star Maps, with Carth and Phoenix not able to give any input on our next destination we need to hurry…the longer we stay here gives Malak more time to discover where we are and send more of his minions to go after us. Our issue with the wookiees only defines the fact that Kashyyyk should be where we obviously head."

I sighed, that reasoning made a lot more sense than going to Kashyyyk for the sake of our wookiee problem. Yet it still seemed like Bastila was hiding something. "Alright…fine…I still think you're holding out on me, Princess. But we'll go. Besides it's a good bet that Malak already knows where we are headed, he did send those two Dark Jedi out on us plus that creaky Calo Nord. Good thing, Juhani, I and that HK droid killed him. There still is that Echani…Dark Jedi. Which reminds me, do you know anything about him?"

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

"The Echani...yes, I did do a brief look up on him in the Enclave and Temple records. His name is Omni Khan. He was a Jedi Knight, a Jedi guardian to be exact. He was made a knight about a couple of years ago after the Mandalorian Wars. He was known for his skill in lightsaber fighting and his skill in Echani martial arts. It was the Order's hope that he would be a Battlemaster. The Order had decided to send him to bring down Revan, that was of course before they decided to send me and a small task force. He was an obvious choice to send against the Dark Lord. Perhaps his mission was a bit too obvious, as that mission ended up a failure and Revan managed to convert him to his cause."

Canderous managed a grin. "A warrior…and Revan managed to subdue him. Revan's skill in combat never ceases to amaze me."

I glared at the Mandalorian. I did not like his assessment even though it was obvious that the Order was likely overconfident in regards to Omni's skill in combat as well as the Echani's temperament in regards to combat.

"Enough talk, Mandalorian are you going to start up the engines or not?"

"Give me a minute; you damn impatient Jedi princess…"

I watched as Canderous sat down in Carth's normal seat and he snorted. "Damn that Republic really knows how to make this pilot's chair his own."

He quietly adjusted the seat and then proceeded to go through the pre-flight checks. Canderous then took The Ebon Hawk up. The ship ended up rising above the atmosphere of Tatooine. Canderous plugged in the hyperspace coordinates for Kashyyyk and the streaks of hyperspace soon appeared.

* * *

A/N: Short Chapter but this seems as good a place to end a chapter. There will probably one, two, maybe three Hyperspace chapters. Perhaps a Saul/Malak/Dodonna/ Maybe even a Minden Ravenheart pov as well.

Thanks go to Kosiah for recommending me reigning in some of the Bastila/Phoenix romantic tension. I tried to pull some of that in and re-edited the chapter some. Pretty sure Phoenix isn't going to be happy with what Bastila is pulling now and things are clearly...well broken.

Ether: Thanks so much for your comments in regards to chapter corrections. I try….I really do. I corrected my last chapter, by the way, I am a bit OCD and it can be a bit of a pain at times. So I do look over a lot of your corrections quite frequently and take them seriously. Yea the game states the Dragon was lured in by the Dark Side. I like to think Revan had something to deal with that. I think I pulled a fast one in this chapter. No crew…confab on this, just Bastila being quite adamant that they head for Kashyyyk for fear that Phoenix would be firm and say they were going to Korriban.

Supermantees2: Pregnant Revan….well….maybe, later on, like really later on. Towards the end of the whole story because trying to fight Malak with being four or five months pregnant not ideal. Not ideal at all. I could see maybe a month or a few weeks possibly. There's only so much a Jedi can do…most of the Jedi who were pregnant ended up in isolation or hidden away. They don't normally do Jedi stuff with a child on the way, Satele Shan….sure as heck didn't. But I will consider your review. I did try and do a story with a pregnant Revan a loooong time ago on kotorfanmedia but….never finished it. Since I can't retrieve my stuff from there it remains in cyber oblivion.:(


	59. Ch 58: Hyperspace: Trouble with Saints

**Chapter 58: Hyperspace: Trouble with Saints and Sinners**

 **~Mission~**

What on Taris is going on? I felt the ship move off Tatooine. I thought I would have been at least informed about our leaving the planet. Apparently not. Meanwhile, Big Z gave a low moan. He had been a bit on edge since there was a gathering of a group of wookiees on the ship. He kept his distance around the cargo bay as all the wookiees shunned him. I sighed. "Big Z…I know you're the silent type but what happened on your home that your clan hates you?"

Big Z sighed. "I…I lashed out in anger against my brother, he allowed Czerka outsider filth to take my people as slaves. In my anger, I struck out with my claws. That is forbidden. He still bears the marks on his face. In anger and in the tradition of our clan my father banished me."

"Gee Big Z…I can't blame you for lashing out, slavery is wrong; like bantha poodoo wrong."

"Yes, but attacking with claws is wrong. Our claws are tools. It marks me as a madclaw. My father accepts me… somewhat...because of my life debt with Phoenix but because of the others, he chooses to keep a wide distance from me. Then there is my… intended mate Wrrljiykam. We were...close since cubs but now she treats me like rancor spit because of my attack on my brother. Yet…she cannot stomach my brother either. He tried claiming her as his mate."

"Well, that kicks rocks, Big Z. Isn't there something we can do to get your people to respect you again?"

Big Z moaned and said, "Overcoming such things is difficult if not impossible."

"Well...Big Z...I am going over to the cargo hold and have a talk with your people."

Zaalbar shook his head and growled. "No...don't, it will only make my shame worse."

"I don't care, Zaalbar; your people are being stupid. You did what you had to do. So I am going to speak with them, now!"

Zaalbar growled and roared back, "I can't stop you if you do. I just wish…you wouldn't."

"Tough noogies, Big Z; I am going!"

I stormed off and went straight to the cargo hold. I found myself, a small twi'lek girl in front of several burly and hairy wookiees hooting and roaring among themselves. Man did they stink. No wonder, they kept using the fresher but it didn't seem to help their strong odor. They probably had issues dealing with their own aroma.

There were dead gizka everywhere, it looked like some had been eaten raw. Eww! But then again Zaalbar wasn't particular about what he ate either. I had questioned about why his breath had stunk on Taris and he said he had taken a bite out of one of the gamorrean slavers. Bleck! I saw blasters being passed along. Oh, yea...I almost forgot, Phoenix had mentioned something about hidden weapons parts within the gizka and the wookiees had pieced them together. They weren't bowcasters but beggars couldn't be fussy. I overheard several wookiees, it was hard to pick up the roars and grunts of so many wookiees but I got the gist of it. They all wanted to kill Chuundar, the usurper chieftain. Many of them said that right belonged to Freyyr and others said that it belonged to the one who could claim the blade of Bacca.

"I want to speak to Zaalbar's father!" I demanded.

The wookiees were suddenly quiet as if saying Zaalbar's name was taboo. I shook my head. "Okaay…so don't everybody speak all at once."

A brown furred wookiee came forward. "I am Freyyr. What is it you want little cub?"

I snorted, what was it with people calling me a kid? "I am not a cub."

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say because Freyyr and the rest of the wookiees started chuckling and laughing at me.

Freyyr finally stopped chuckling and said. "You are tough for a little one...outsider cub. Why do you wish to speak to me?"

So this was Zaalbar's father. I folded up my arms and looked at him firmly. "What do ya got against Zaalbar, Freyyr? He only was trying to keep you and others from being slaves."

Freyyr sighed. "He lashed out against his own brother with his claws, little cub. Tradition dictated his exile and his status. I can only do so much for my son, outsider cub."

"Yea...I get that, but...from what I understand, your son helped free you from slavery. Doesn't that count for something?"

Freyyr nodded. "It does...some. But his status as madclaw still remains as does mine."

I frowned. "What? Did you attack someone with your claws too?"

Freyyr shook his head. "No...but my son Chuundar has labeled me as a madclaw as well. He used it as justification when he sold me to Czerka slavers. He had hoped that I would be so mad at him that the Czerka filth would kill me. Yet... Wrrljiykam is a wise wook for a cub. She managed to hold my anger and madness at bay. She reminded me of a prophecy and what it stated so long ago. It was the only thing that helped me hold onto my sanity."

It seemed like Zaalbar's intended was a good match for Big Z. "Well slavery and madclaw status aside, is there any way that Big Z could be welcomed back into his clan as well as you?"

Freyyr scratched his fur in a contemplative manner and then stated. "He must find the blade of Bacca. It is a weapon that was formed by our greatest chieftain. During a great combat by one of his descendants and chieftains of our clan, the sword broke in the hide of a mighty beast. Chuundar has the hilt. If Zaalbar were to find the blade, and bring it to me; his dishonor, as well as mine, would slowly begin to be lifted. It would also help to partially fulfill the prophecy spoken of a long time ago. By finding the blade, it would be enough to prove that Bacca's spirit and power are with him as well as help me prove my right as the proper chieftain."

I nodded. "I see…so Big Z has to find this blade to help him get out of his dishonor. So what is this prophecy?"

Freyya looked as if he was trying to recall something very old. He then hooted, "It is said that an outsider and a wookiee will fight together and bring salvation or damnation to our clan."

"That…that sounds rather generic if you ask me."

Freyya shrugged. "Regardless, the prophecy states an outsider and a wookiee must fight together to save or damn our clan, and they will do so by first bringing us the lost blade of Bacca."

I sighed. "And the blade is in the hide of a beast?"

Freyya nodded and a bunch of roars and growls echoed in the cargo bay and I heard the words they spoke.

"Bring the blade of Bacca…"

I nodded. I wondered if Big Z knew of this prophecy.

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

I kept bumping against the bunk that held the two switched off humans. They were so completely in recharge mode that they didn't even feel the ship hit hyperspace. I beeped and squawked in alarm and I almost gave up but then Phoenix whacked me on my dome. "Fracking shut up….T3."

:: But Phoenix…we're in hyperspace.::

She groaned but apparently, my words sunk in and her eyes snapped open. "What!"

She nudged Carth. "Republic…"

Carth groaned. "Morgana…"

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "Fracking Hell, Carth…this is no time for some fracking dream of your long dead wife, we're in hyperspace."

"Uhhh..." He turned over and went back into recharge mode.

I beeped some more and Phoenix sighed. "I am trying T3…but Carth's attached to my fracking waist."

She roughly poked him in the side, and Carth suddenly woke up. "Hey!"

Phoenix smirked a bit. "Now you're awake. Damn compulsion…sorry about that Republic."

Carth sighed. "I was with Morgana we were talking about Dustil. She said..." His eyes glazed over. "Damn it…I can't remember what she was telling me." He paused, and he looked as if he was trying to recall something through his processors. He then said. "She said he was in pain and that his soul was bleeding."

I watched as Phoenix cocked her head in an expression I deemed as an expression of curiosity. "That sounds like a Force vision, Carth. Maybe my compulsion did something. Although I've never heard of anything like that happening with compulsion it's not like the Force is an exact science. I am beginning to realize that it can do a lot of freaky shit."

I beeped a long strand of conversation, and Phoenix patted my dome. "Alright…I am sorry I haven't been paying much attention to you T3. It's not like I haven't been busy. And stop being a jealous droid. I haven't been favoring HK over you."

I interjected,:: But you have constantly asked for his assistance over mine. I should never have sliced into your extended family's finances and recorded the transaction with him to you.::

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I groaned, damn it! T3 was developing an odd sort of quirk. Seriously, jealousy! Since when do droids end up being jealous of other droids? In many respects, that wasn't normal, not normal at all. However, I vowed that I wouldn't memory wipe T3. There was something about that droid's quirky personality that I liked. "Maybe I should give you a memory wipe, T3."

T3 gave a long beep. _Dwoooo..._

"Then I suggest you shut up, T3. Now, what is this about being in hyperspace?"

Carth's eyes went wide. "What? How?"

I looked thoughtful. Mission couldn't pilot a ship. I doubted Bastila or Juhani could. Maybe one of the wookiees, that was a thought but why would they take control of the ship? I had found out briefly from Juhani that the wookiees were slaves that she had freed. She mentioned she did it in honor of the Jedi who freed her. Yet, that didn't make sense why a wookiee would take over the ship. I doubted they knew how. There was the possibility that T3 could pilot a ship. Yet, with the droid being here waking us up that ruled T3 out. HK was loyal to me. He would never take control of the ship without my orders. It only left one person left, Canderous.

T3 responded:: I don't know, Phoenix. I just know we are in hyperspace.::

I snorted, "Yea, but I've got a good idea about who put us there." I got up out of the bunk grabbed my lightsabers, quickly threw on some clothes, and stormed out of the room.

I heard Carth cry out. "Phoenix…don't act rashly."

I barked out, "HK…"

The droid came to my call. Query: Are you planning on killing someone, Master?

"Maybe."

Statement: My receptors are quivering with anticipation with whatever murderous purpose you intend.

"Murderous is an understatement, HK. I am thoroughly incensed!"

I found Canderous in the cockpit. "Canderous, did you put us in hyperspace?"

He said firmly. "I did...but hear me out. That spoiled Jedi princess of yours told me to, in fact, she ordered me to. She said she was in charge of this mission and told us to head towards Kashyyyk."

I glared angrily. "She's only partially in charge of this mission. If she's so hung up on such things than I need to remind her that we were both put in charge of this mission. Unless..." I paused, realization suddenly dawned on me. "Damn it…I am not in charge of this mission. Am I, Canderous?"

Canderous looked at me, an expression of pity on his features. He looked as though he wanted to say something to me, but something held him back. There was something about that look I disliked. I didn't want the Mandalorian's pity. Since when did Mandalorians show pity? From what I knew of Mandalorians, they didn't show pity. Yet the look he held only lasted a few seconds and then quickly disappeared. I was right, it was unbecoming of a Mandalorian to give such a glance. He had tried to hide it, but I had seen it. He stated firmly,"Phoenix...I don't know what game the Jedi are playing with you. But you're right, you're not in charge of this mission, Bastila is."

My spirits fell. "Damn it all. The Jedi don't trust me!"

I ignited my lightsabers and looked ready to go on another rampage. I was angry, and the Force rushed in an angry torrent begging me to let the Dark Side in. I had a brief image of me slaughtering all the occupants of the ship, their blood dripping down my clothing. It would be so easy, to let go and be one with my anger. It seemed so simplistic, primal and in some way so delightfully satisfying. Yet in the end, such ideas were wrong, sadistic and very much the ideas of a psychopath. Frack! How could I have such thoughts? Was this because I was possessed by Revan? Was this the way Malak was? A psychopath.

 _Don't blame me for your darkness, Phoenix. This is one hundred percent you._

But you're the fracking Dark Lord. You keep urging me to give into my darkness.

 _Urging you is not the same thing as submitting to it. I've told you to find balance. Darkness and light are both a part of it. I..._ Revan paused. _I couldn't resist it. I thought I could. I was wrong. It swallowed me whole. Yes, I urged you but I believe you're different, unique. I believe…_ She sighed. _Find balance, that is all I ask._

What the frack does that mean? Find balance? Am I supposed to find a way between both halves of the Force? Is that what you mean? That's not Sith, and that's not Jedi. What the frack? What kind of Dark Lord are you?

Revan laughed. _A philosophical one. I never turned my back on Jedi teachings because they had their uses. Malak is a fool. He hates the Jedi so much, he turned his back on whatever teachings they had. I tried to teach him that it is not weakness to acknowledge and rely upon the strengths of your enemies. To reject them, however, is a weakness. Perhaps that is why he deposed me. However, his rejection of my teachings, it will fail him in the end._

I sighed, what the frack do you want with me, Revan?

 _A willing student. Someone who will listen to me. I suppose you will do in a pinch. It's not as if I am going anywhere. All I am saying is the Force is not exclusively Light nor is it exclusively Dark. Do not use one at the exclusion of the other. I wanted to...I tried to._

Revan paused and sighed heavily. _I failed, Phoenix. I couldn't...the Darkness swallowed me whole and still swallows me. I am destined to it. You, however, are not. I see potential. Something more. Don't fail me, Phoenix. For the sake of everything, don't fail me._

This was fracking confusing, who the frack was Revan? I still held onto my lightsabers. Our conversation could have only been a few seconds but with Revan's banter, it always felt longer.

Canderous' face screwed up in a firm look. He lifted up his blaster rifle and pointed it at me. What the frack did Bastila tell him? Did she say I was mentally unstable? Judging by the way, he held the weapon. It was a good bet she had made the damn Mandalorian question my whole psyche. My action with the Sand People, no doubt put uncertainty in Bastila's mind regarding me. She probably saw me as unhinged. Of Course, I was fracking possessed by Revan! Even Bastila knew that I was…unstable. What Jedi has conversations with a fracking dead Dark Lord of the Sith?

I gulped, my lightsabers were ignited and I wasn't helping that impression with the fury surely seen on my face. I switched off my blades and then snorted.

"I don't know what the frack Bastila said to you about me, Canderous. But if you even think of shooting me. I'll drop you to the ground before you even pull the trigger."

He grinned a bit and lowered his weapon. "That sounds like the Phoenix I know. Look, kid, you're better off not being a part of that fracking Order. I don't know why they matter so much to you in the first place. It's time you learn that dashed hopes are part of life. Believe me, my life has been filled with it. I can tell you…"

"More war stories?"

He nodded.

"I don't want to hear them, at least not at the moment."

The fact that I wasn't as in charge of this mission as I had thought devastated me. Yet Canderous was right, why did the Order matter so much to me? It was as if…I had some sick desire to please them, despite the fact that I saw the errors with their philosophies and their teachings. I still wanted to obey them, follow their objectives, their mission. What the frack? They don't fracking trust me and…that's sick. That's fracking sick. I am Phoenix Star. I never follow authority. I follow my own, or at least I thought I did. All of that fracking changed when I found out on Taris I had the Force and then on Dantooine when I submitted to Jedi teachings. What the frack is going on here? Something about this whole thing seemed rather odd. I'd gone from noncompliance to authority to embracing it. What the kriffing Hell is going on here? It's like I have no control over my own life and some master puppet master was pulling the strings. Was that the Force or was it something else? I shuddered at that thought.

I grinned at Canderous, and he responded,"Fair enough, but come to me later on and we will spar a bit and I'll tell you more about it."

"Damn Bastila and damn the fracking Order."

HK suddenly spoke up, Statement: Master, allow me to kill the Padawan Bastila for you.

I glared at HK. "You will not. You won't lay a hand on her. Even, though…"

I paused. I felt like I wanted to tear her body into thousands of different pieces. It all began to make sense, why Bastila had forced me into the krayt dragon cave. While she sat there and watched me do all the work for the Star Map. I was the fracking Jedi grunt and she was the commander. She probably was making daily reports regarding me to the fracking council."Just go back into standby, HK. If I need you, I will call you."

HK responded, Resigned Statement: As you wish, Master.

He looked disappointed as he stalked back to his area of the ship.

I stormed off, my anger, transformed into sadness. I felt devastated. I had truly believed that I was a co-leader in this mission and to find out otherwise made me feel not only angry but sad that the Jedi didn't trust me. I knew I disliked authority and following it, but part of me still wanted to submit to it...I wanted that trust. I wanted to be an upstanding member of the Order. I wanted that trust badly, like a child wanting the love and affection from a parent. I was fracked up in the head. It was like how I felt when I first met Bastila on Taris, I wanted her approval and her respect and for a time I wanted to be like her. I even thought she was kind of cute. Damn, I had come a long way from that sort of thinking.

The tears threatened to come down my face. I ran into Carth. He was my friend, my confidant, my lover. Of all people, I knew I could trust him. Bastila had stabbed me way too much. I hated her, and I loved her. I wanted to trust her, but I couldn't and...frack my mind was like one big mess filled with conflicting ideas, thoughts and jumbled up all to hell. That couldn't all be because of my being possessed by Revan, could it? No, well maybe part of it, but I was fracked in the head that was all there was to it. I sighed and submitted to whatever fracked up feelings and emotions my mind began to offer up. Carth could tell I was troubled, and he enfolded his arms around me as the tears came pouring down my face.

"They don't trust me, Republic. The fracking Order doesn't trust me. Bastila ordered Canderous to take us to Kashyyyk and didn't even consult with us."

Carth stroked my dark black hair. "Something isn't right, Phoenix. I blamed it on you, before, but I... I think the Jedi didn't tell us everything."

"Yea no shit, Republic."

"What are you going to do about Bastila?"

"Well I'd like to beat her sorry ass into the ground, but that's wishful thinking. I am tied to her…hurting her would be like hurting myself."

Carth shook his head. "That's another thing, Phoenix. How the hell did you get bonded to Bastila in the first place?"

I shrugged. "The Council says it happened on Taris. Remember…I was injured by Bendak Starkiller and Bastila treated me, nursed me. The council says they believe the bond was formed during then."

Carth snorted. "How would they know? They weren't there. It sounds like they are grasping at straws, Phoenix."

My shoulders slumped. I still was tired, I never got the sleep I needed. "I just want to sleep, Republic. I am still so very tired."

Carth nodded. "I know...why don't you worry about Bastila later, Phoe..."

"Nix…"

I sighed, so much for sleep. I turned and looked at Mission. Carth's face screwed up in annoyance. He looked like he wanted to say something else to me, but Mission interrupted whatever he was going to say.

She looked firmly at me. "I...well not really me…but Zaalbar needs your help. I know him, though, and he's too proud to come to you and ask for it but we need to find a missing blade on Kashyyyk."

I raised an eyebrow. "Well whether I like it or not we're headed for Kashyyyk, Mish. What's up with Zaalbar?"

"Well...there's a reason why Zaalbar isn't hanging around the other wookiees on the ship."

"And?"

"Well, apparently his brother is selling his people into slavery, and Zaalbar went berserk. He attacked his brother with his claws. It's a taboo among his people. They exiled him for it. Yet, Zaalbar only was trying to do the right thing, Nix."

I nodded. "And what does this have to do with a blade?"

"Well, apparently there is some sort of prophecy about an outsider and a wookiee finding the blade of Bacca. It was lost in the hide of a beast. I think…I think..."

Mission stuttered, and I said firmly. "Well damn it, Mission out with it."

"I think you might be the outsider, and Big Z is the wookiee in their prophecy."

"So I am an outsider with a wookiee, you're an outsider too, Mission."

"Yea, but I know Big Z, there is no way he's going to let me go hunting after some big beast with a wookiee relic."

I sighed. "And what's so important about this blade?"

"It's the only way; Zaalbar can be redeemed in the eyes of his people and his father can prove that he's the true chieftain."

I sighed, I doubted I was going to get much sleep. "I see, and I suppose you want Zaalbar and me to go hunting for this blade."

"Could you, Nix?"

"I'll do my best, Mish."

Mission suddenly hugged me tightly. I felt like she was going to squeeze the life out of me. "Thank you, Nix. I knew I could count on you. There are definite fringe benefits to being friends with a Jedi!"

I chuckled lightly, and Mission went off, an obvious spring in her step.

"You know, Carth...I've been thinking..."

"Uh oh…"

"What! Aren't I allowed to think?"

"Yea, but your thoughts always get us into some sort of trouble, or we get into more than what we're bargaining for."

I rolled my eyes. "You know after all this is over, we really need to think about Mission. She'd rot in a Republic foundling home. She wouldn't fit in, and you know it. She'd likely run away or worse, she might join the Exchange and become nothing more than a petty criminal."

Carth nodded. "And…"

"I think we should adopt her, Carth."

Carth shook his head. "That's crazy, Phoenix you're a Jedi, and I am a Republic soldier. How in the galaxy are we going to raise her?"

I sighed. "I don't know, but Mission is half grown as it is. The Jedi would never allow Mission and Zaalbar to hang around me and you know it. But if we adopt her and become her…" I paused and mulled over the word. "Parents. The Jedi and even the Republic Military would have no choice but to accept we are her legal guardians."

Carth suddenly laughed. "Phoenix...you certainly know how to jump the blaster rifle. In order to be her parents…we'd have to...well…marry and…"

"And this is the right thing to do, Republic. Maybe not the marria...err…not that I am opposed to that but I mean…adopting Mission."

Carth squeezed my hand, and he gave me a kiss on my cheek. "I know what you mean, my cheeky little Raven. And yes you shameful…wench, I'll marry you. I was going to…" He paused a moment. "Well, I was going to...well I was thinking about our relationship in a more permenant arrangement, and marriage was part of it I was going to ask you about... but...Mission came bounding in and interrupted us. You really are a brazen one."

My face turned deep crimson, it wasn't really my intention to ask Carth to marry me. I had only been worried about Mission's future. I stuttered. "I...I….that was not really my intention, Republic."

He laughed. "I know. Maybe next time you'll learn to not insert your mouth into things. Apparently, it gets you into more trouble than it's worth. You still want to marry me, Phoenix?"

I turned even redder. I wanted to say yes but I said softly. "Please…Carth, don't say anything about this to anyone. Not Canderous, Juhani, Mission, Zaalbar, or even Bastila. Although I am sure she'll figure it out eventually. There is plenty of time…I mean...we could still…you barely know me Carth. I barely know you. Marriage is…uhh a big step…I don't know if I am ready. What possessed me to say let's adopt Mission?"

Carth nodded. "Don't get cold feet on my account, Phoenix. Look, why don't we just say we are pledged to each other. It's going to be awhile before we even consider adopting Mission. We'd have to go through paperwork and we don't even know if she would accept being adopted by us. We still have lots of time to know each other and back out if...it doesn't work out."

I couldn't answer all I could do was numbly nod. Carth wrapped his arms around me. "Come on, let's get you back to bed so you can sleep."

I felt confused. I wanted to be Phoenix Star Onasi. I honestly did, but this felt like it was all happening way too quickly and way too fast. Somehow I knew this happiness wasn't going to last. It just wasn't. As much as I wanted to be Carth's wife, something would mar our happiness. The Force seemed to echo its haunting warning within me that this wasn't going to last. Why did I even say anything about wanting to adopt Mission?

I found myself back in bed with Carth's arms around me. He sighed and said softly. "You do realize if we eventually get together. You'll be Dustil's stepmother."

"Carth...you really ought to think about what Dustil is going to say if he sees us together. He's likely to resent us. I am not his mother, and nothing I do will make me his mother."

Carth nodded. "I know. All this talk about adoption and marriage. It just dawned on me that you'd be adopting Dustil too. Are you sure you're up to that?"

I sighed. "I don't know, Carth. I honestly don't know. I want to do what's right for Mission. I guess that means I want to do what's right for Dustil too."

He kissed me firmly on my lips and then said. "I love you, Phoenix Star." I suddenly gasped as that profession of his affection became action. Why was I honestly worried about the future? I loved Carth, and he loved me, wasn't that enough? After all, this was over with Malak I would be Phoenix Star Onasi. I pushed all my doubts away as Carth and I made love. His name came from my lips as I felt sheer pleasure in his arms. Our future was certain, and the Force, Bastila, and the Jedi could be damned for all I was concerned.

 ***Hours later** *

I groaned and stretched as I woke up. I felt so much better, so much clearer in mind and so much more focused. I wasn't sure how long we had been asleep or how long we had been in hyperspace but I lightly kissed Carth on his cheek. "Hey Republic..."

He smiled. "I'd say good morning, but I can't find my damn crono."

"Ah, Space travel...the eternal mystery of whether or not it is day or it is night."I then chuckled. "Cheer up, Republic it's always day somewhere and night somewhere else."

I lightly brushed my feet against his, and he smirked. "So my little Raven wants to play now."

I grinned. "I am pretty sure we did enough of that earlier on."

A knock at the pilot's bunk door made me reach out with the Force to find out who was bothering us and I froze and mouthed. "Bastila."

Carth shook his head. "Force...what the hell does that woman want now?"

I quickly threw on my clothing, and I realized I had almost put on Carth's pants. He laughed, and he said, "I'd be a sight putting on your pants wouldn't, I?"

I threw his pants at him and grabbed mine and put them on and put on my smuggler's clothing.

Carth quickly put on his clothing and I quietly opened the door. Bastila's face looked neutral in appearance but inwardly I knew differently. She knew regarding my...indiscretion with Carth. Of course, she knew. She tried not to look upset. I grinned as part of me took pleasure in her physical and mental discomfort. She had, after all, took off without even consulting with us about where we should have gone.

Frankly, Kashyyyk was a sound decision, I would probably have agreed to have gone there if Bastila had only conferred with me and the others of the crew. Yea, Carth would have made a fuss but he knew as I did that our mission with Malak superseded the finding of his son. Yet, Bastila had pulled rank as it was commonly called and it made me feel sour against the woman. It rankled with an incredible lack of trust. We were Force bonded, she was supposed to know me. Yet in the end, this decision clearly showed that she really didn't know me as well as she claimed.

"What do you want?" I said in a very acerbic tone.

"To inform you...of..."

"I already know, BAS-tila," I said her name with a tone filled with contempt.

She cringed. "I am sorry, but you and Carth were indisposed and we really needed to go."

"A poor excuse is still a poor excuse. It wouldn't have taken that long to make the decision. Apparently, Kashyyyk was where Mission wanted us to head, she came to me speaking of a way to redeem Zaalbar. So it can only be assumed she wished us to go to Kashyyyk. I am life bonded to Zaalbar so he follows where I choose to go. Juhani..."

"She agreed with my decision."

I sighed. "And I would have chosen Kashyyyk as well, even though Carth wishes to go after his son. Our mission against Malak is more important, even…"

I looked at Carth. "And you understand that, don't you, Republic?"

Carth nodded. "If there is any chance to stop Malak, then we have to follow the mission the Jedi are on. My personal feelings about my son." He sighed and then said, "As much as I want to go after my son on Korriban. I understand...I am a Republic Soldier first and my duty is to the Republic, Bastila. Try and give me some credit."

I glared at Bastila. "So you see your decision to go above our heads was foolish."

Bastila's shoulders slumped. "I...I am sorry...I was…I was afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"Afraid of Korriban, afraid that the lure of the Dark Side on Korriban might erode your will."

I was quiet and contemplated her words and said softly. "I see..." I didn't want to admit that she might be right. I too dreaded Korriban. I didn't want to head to that planet. Even the name chilled me to my very being. I knew of the planet even as a smuggler and I had heard rumors that the planet was unnatural.

"Your fears are justified, Bastila. But next time…don't leave me out of the loop. It's bad enough the Council doesn't trust me. Not having your trust hurts me even more."

Bastila nodded and said softly. "Again I am sorry."

I brushed Bastila with the Force. She was sorry. Yet, I could sense there was more so much more to her reason as to why she didn't want us to go to Korriban. It had to deal with the fact that the Jedi Council did not trust me.

I looked at Carth. "Carth, Bastila and I need to speak alone."

He nodded, and he said. "Alright, Phoenix. I'll see if I can whip something up for us to eat. Provided that the wookiees haven't eaten it all."

I nodded, and he exited the room.

"Bastila let's get this settled and let's get this settled now. Is it true that the council put you in charge of this mission and I am not really in charge of anything and you are the primary leader?"

Bastila sighed. "It is true. But you must understand the reasoning for this, Phoenix. You're possessed by a Sith Lord, and not just any Sith Lord, but the Dark Lord Revan. Your actions haven't always been the most rational at times. I am also bonded to you. I can sense the confusion of your addled mind, your thoughts are chaotic and not always focused."

I contemplated Bastila's words. Everything she said was true, but then, on the other hand, I had every right to be...upset, particularly now. Although the term, "upset" was probably putting it mildly.

I angrily stated,"If my thoughts and actions are chaotic and not focused, then it's because of you!"

Bastila blanched suddenly. What I said must have been true for her to suddenly pale. I rolled my eyes. "You're not exactly a center of calm and rational thought either, Bastila."

She shook her head. "I have more years of experience, Phoenix. I've been a padawan much longer than you. I believe that this is my chance to become a master Jedi."

I snorted. "Experience! Fracking Hell, Bastila. You're only a few years older than Mission. You're still a child in many respects. Need I forget to tell you, that I am older than you, but I've never let that bother me, at least not before. I recognized that you've been a Jedi much longer than me. Yet, if you're going to throw that in my face then I have every right to throw up the fact that I've been a smuggler, a pilot, merchant, and a farmer much longer than you have ever been a Jedi. I have more real life experience than you. We could have been co-leaders in this mission but now I see that is not even a kriffing option with you. And you being a master Jedi!" I suddenly laughed. "So that's what I am, some grand step for you to become a Jedi Master? Good luck with your leadership, Bastila. I hope you're happy!"

I stormed off from her, my anger boiling off of me. I ended up in the kitchen. Carth handed me a bowl of what looked like mush from the food dispenser. I took a bite of it, and I cringed. It still hadn't been fixed, at least there weren't strange, odd chunks in the mush. I sighed. I went back to casually eating the food and Carth said to me,"So how did it go with Bastila?"

"It didn't. She wants to be the fracking leader of this mission, and she can. But good luck if she can get people to follow her."

Carth nodded. "This is like the Endar Spire all over again. I remember, she insisted she was in command of the ship, even back then."

"I wouldn't know, Carth. I was pretty wasted, I was in a bed trying to sleep off a hangover. I pretty much blew my enlistment bonus that the Jedi offered me. I don't…I don't remember much before that, I think... they say that too much alcohol can cause a fog of memory. I just remember glasses and glasses of juma in a Coruscanti cantina, oh and pazzaak, lots of pazzaak."

Carth chuckled. "I remember. You were dressed in your smuggler clothing like you are now and you smelled like juma. I still don't know how you managed to fight off Sith half hung over like that."

"The Force, probably. I probably was subconsciously drawing on it. Anyway, I say we let Bastila continue in her delusion that she's in charge. If she can handle it, good for her. If not then we will pick up the pieces afterward. I really don't want to do this, but I can see it's the only way that we can make her realize that she needs us."

"Agreed, who knows, Phoenix she might need you sooner than you think."

I nodded. "That is my hope."

"What about the fact that the Jedi Council doesn't trust you, Phoenix."

I sighed. "I have had a lot of time to consider this, Carth. It hurts, believe me. As you said, there is something the Jedi are not telling me, including Bastila. There's absolutely nothing I can do on that, short of going back to Dantooine and demanding answers and I seriously doubt that they would answer me, even then. They would just placate me with non-answers. So...we're stuck with going after the Star Maps and hopefully, I can demand answers afterward."

"I get the feeling that's not what you want, Phoenix."

I shrugged. "It's not ideal, Republic but what other choice do I have? If I go back to Dantooine, Bastila is going to be on me like a k'lor'slug and questioning why I want to go back. She would probably insist that she has all the answers anyway. She also thinks this grand mission is her chance to become a Jedi Master."

Carth's jaw dropped. "She can't be serious. I thought you have to become a Knight before you could even consider becoming a Master."

I nodded and then suddenly laughed. "Right, she obviously has delusions of grandeur. All she is is a young woman barely out of childhood. Her inexperience is going to get us all killed. She might have been able to face Revan. But she got lucky on that, Malak killed his master, not Bastila. If Malak hadn't done that, she probably would have died, because Revan would have killed her."

"That's rather a harsh assessment on Bastila."

"Frack, Republic it's the truth. What were the Jedi thinking to send her as part of the strike team to take down Revan?"

Carth sighed. "She may have been used as bait, Phoenix. Remember, Malak wants Bastila. I am sure Revan wanted Bastila too."

I nodded. "That's true. I forgot about that. Still sending a young Jedi Padawan against someone like Revan. It seems that the Jedi were desperate using her as bait. If Bastila was killed…then the Republic would be lost."

"Then it's a good thing that she didn't die, and it was Revan who ended up killed. The galaxy is better off without that murderer. To think I use to look up to Revan and Malak and thought of them as the best humanity could offer. Now…well, nothing would please me more than taking a blaster straight to Malak's head, well Revan's too if he was still alive."

I cringed as Carth mentioned that Revan was a man. Carth frowned. "What?"

Sure, if I told him he was mistaken about Revan being a man, he would want to know how I knew Revan was a female. I knew that would lead to a conversation I couldn't really give. So I changed the subject.

"You make it sound like you knew them personally."

"No, I didn't know them personally. They aided the Republic during the Mandalorian Wars. They were heroes. Without them, the Mandalorians would have finished us for certain. In the fleet, we didn't see much of the Jedi. I only met Malak once in the officer's mess, but I guess that just shows how much the dark side can change someone."

"You met Malak once. What...what was he like?"

"Well, he was tall and well…he was drunk."

I laughed. "Drunk…Malak drunk! I'd like to have seen that."

"Yea, he was with some female Jedi. She kept herself hidden under a cowl. She drunk a little but she was mostly quiet and observing. She acted as if she was shy and didn't like crowds. She kept herself to the shadows. Meanwhile, Malak was loud and obnoxious."

I frowned, a strange female Jedi? I bet that had to be Revan.

"Did he say anything to you?"

"Yea, he said he bet he could drink me under the table."

I laughed. "No offense Republic, but I bet I could drink you under the table."

Carth chuckled. "Well, I declined. I told Malak he was drunk and acting like an idiot. He got upset and drew his damn lightsaber on me, but the female Jedi he was with grabbed him with such power and slammed him down on the table. She told him firmly to leave me alone and that he stunk like a horde of drunken Mandalorians. The rest of the men in the officer's mess laughed. However, Malak paled; stammered an apology to her and left. She apologized for Malak's behavior, and she quickly left. I never saw them again after that."

I grinned. "Sounds like Malak was a jerk even back then."

"Ehh, I guess there was something always rotten about Malak though but…I never found out that Jedi's name either and I looked for her to thank her."

"Maybe she didn't want to be thanked, Republic. From what little you told me of her, she preferred the shadows and preferred to pass unnoticed. It's surprising she even reacted to Malak's behavior."

"That's why I wanted to thank her. She seemed uncomfortable reacting to Malak or even being there. I suppose…" He sighed.

"You suppose what?"

"I suppose she fell to the Dark Side as well."

"Probably. Do you even know why they turned to the Dark Side?"

"Nobody does. When they left after the Mandalorian wars ended, they were Jedi. When they returned... they were something else."

I sighed and shook my head. "That woman Jedi seemed really noble, Carth. She probably saved you. I just don't understand. How could Revan, and Malak get away with such things?"

"Well... when they returned from wherever, they went, they had an entire fleet with them. Nobody knows where they got the ships. They had a lot of them and as the years have passed there always seems to be more and more... while our forces dwindle. Did they really get away with it, though? Revan was betrayed by Malak... and Malak hasn't won. In the end, the dark side won't help him. "

I wondered what the kriffing Hell happened to Revan? If she could save Carth and then she turned to the Dark Side? I shook my head. "Republic, what do you know about the Dark Side?"

"I, uh... used to think it was a fancy name for something that I see every day. Corruption is everywhere. People are greedy and stupid and do horrible things. I'm starting to think it's different for the Jedi, however. That there's this evil watching them, waiting for its chance."

"I...Carth, I am inclined to agree with you."

He nodded and got close and started to stroke my hair. "You have so much courage and strength in you... yet, somehow, I have no trouble imagining it differently. Like the flip side of a coin."

"I am not perfect, Carth. I've faltered."

"I know...but it still doesn't change the fact that you have shown so much strength in such Darkness and it's not just you. It's Bastila, as well. She's so... intense. I don't pretend to know much about the Force... but I know evil."

"And I refuse to bend to it...Carth. I won't turn to the Dark Side."

"I suppose Malak thought the same before he fell to the Dark Side."

"Look, Republic. I can handle myself."

"I know that, and Bastila says the same thing. You're both incredible women. I'm just... I'm just not sure this is the kind of thing you can defeat."

"Defeat? Frack, Republic, stop acting paranoid. I am not...going to go to the Dark Side. I've tried so hard, frack. I felt so bad about what happened on Tatooine, I refuse to wear my Jedi robes."

He nodded. "I know tha...I...love you. I don't want to lose you."

"Then stop talking about it. You make me nervous talking like this."

"You're right, damn it. You always have to be right about things like this."

I grinned. "Of course I am, now don't worry about me, Carth. I won't…I love you. You are like a beacon to me. My...guiding light."

Carth blushed and turned red. "I...I...never thought you thought of me like that."

"Well, you do. Now are you going to sit there like a blundering idiot, or are you going to kiss me?"

He laughed. "You don't pull any punches do you?"

"Nope."

He chuckled. "You are such a manipulative woman...my little Raven." He pulled me into him and his lips found mine. So warm and so inviting.

* * *

 **~HK-47~**

My master came to me, a slight grin on her face and she seemed to be whistling. I cocked my head.

Query: Master, have you killed something lately that you are in a good mood?

She laughed. "No."

Statement: It is just I have rarely seen you this cheerful, master.

She carried a container of tools and plopped them down beside me. "Sorry, I've been a bit late at this, HK. I've been meaning to do routine maintenance on you. I just…well I've been busy. Did you manage to get all that sarlacc muck out of your gears?"

Answer: Oh yes, master. However, that was most unpleasant.

Query: Master, do you plan on trying to restore some of my memory as well?

She nodded. "I've been meaning to try and work on you. I've just been really busy.

Request: I only ask that you be oh so very careful, master. I am too valuable and well-crafted to perish at the hands of ineptitude.

She glared at me. "Are you implying I am inept?"

Negatory: Err… no, master. You are not a droid, however, and therefore your skills *are* limited by the physical capabilities of your meatbag extremities. Or some such.

She sighed, "I happen to be very good at what I do."

Appeasement: Yes, master. Of course, master. Could we begin?

She proceeded to open up one of my panels. Her eyes shone with a dark intensity as she delicately went in and tried to repair fizzled out wiring and she frowned.

She scratched her head.

Query: Is there anything the matter, master?

"There's little I have to do, HK on this. It seems whatever damage, Master Kreia did to you earlier has repaired itself."She frowned."I know you rerouted to undamaged systems but...all the wiring she burnt out…" She paused and then stated, "How old are you, HK?"

Answer: I have no idea, master. A droid can live a very long time, master.

She nodded and then said, "Well there's nothing I have to do with your wiring. It's all fixed. It seems as if your wiring has regenerated somehow. That's not standard Systech technology, nor is it Czerka standard technology either. I've…" She hesitated for a moment, "I've seen something similar on droids before...but they were…more like ancient relics."

Statement: As far as I know, master, I am not an ancient relic.

"I know that, HK. So now…let's get started on that memory of yours. I'd like to know who you are, HK and where you've come from."

Statement: As do I, master.

She proceeded to access my memory core but her hands shook a bit nervously as she used an arc wrench to get into my internal workings.

I suddenly screamed out, Aahhhh! What are you doing?! Remove the arc wrench, remove the arc wrench! Medic!

She sighed as she quickly removed her arc wrench from me. "Sorry."

Supplication: Perhaps it would be best if you desisted your efforts for the moment, meatb- I mean master. This seems to be going nowhere.

She frowned. "I'd rather try again, HK. I think I know what I did wrong."

I gave a very indignant sigh. Statement: As you wish, master. Just be careful.

Query: How would you like it if someone ended up messing with your most delicate memory processing centers and then ended up mis-wiring something?

"I...well I'd be angry and then I think...I'd kill them, HK. Human memory is a bit more delicate than droid memory. Your memory can be wiped without much harm. Try and do that to a human or any other sentient, it would drive them insane, I think."

Statement: Even though I am a droid, master. I would prefer you be careful. I treasure what little I have left of my memory. And as you stated, I would also kill the meatbag that tampered with my memory.

"I get the point, HK. I'll try and be a bit more careful as I do this.

She carefully re-opened the panel and a bit more carefully worked on my memory core.

My processors suddenly hummed and she looked at me. "Well…"

yes, good. Well done, master. I believe your operation was a success. Accessing new memory…

She smiled.

Access complete: I have restored a great deal of information about my previous owner, master. Would you like to hear it?

"Of course… HK."

Recitation: The earliest memory of my last owner specifies that he was human, a low-ranking commercial officer for Systech Corporation. I am unaware of his designation. He purchased me from an acquaintance I cannot identify, for the purposes of protocol and bodyguard duties.

"Why can't you identify his acquaintance?"

Explanation: That previous owner is part of memories that are still deleted, master. It is customary for a droid's memory to be wiped when it is sold.

"You mentioned this Systech Corporation when I purchased you."

Explanation: Affirmative, master. I had assumed that my previous owner was the corporation, itself. This is not the case. The human purchased me privately.

"This human…he's not still alive, is he?"

Answer: Negative, master. The human was terminated by this HK-47 unit prior to system shut-down.

She raised an eyebrow. "You killed your own master?"

Affirmative, master, though I had not been programmed to do so. The human's termination was accidental.

"What the frack happened?"

Explanation: My former master had owned me for a duration of two standard months before discovering my assassination protocol. He was pleased by the discovery. The human informed me that a competitor corporation was preparing to market a product that would ruin him personally. He was most agitated. He activated my assassination protocol and instructed me to kill all those responsible for the competing product. I proceeded to carry out my order.

Her dark eyes suddenly glinted with curiosity or perhaps it was an internal greediness that I had no idea existed within her. "Wait… tell me about this assassination protocol!"

Information: This HK-47 unit is complete with a protocol that, when invoked, will set me to independently carry out a termination. I will go to whatever lengths, travel whatever distances are required, to complete the termination. This is the reason for my combat skills.

Advisement: Unfortunately, the assassination protocol is currently non-functional. You will not be able to activate it.

My master's whole demeanor seemed to sink and her features expressed a certain sense of disappointment. "Why not?"

Answer: several of my actuators were damaged by my former owner. They cannot be repaired, master, sad though that is.

She sighed, "How did his death occur?"

My former master was unaware of this, but the competitor was, in fact, an arm of Systech Corporation, my master's own employer. It did not take long for my master to realize his mistake. By then, I had already terminated 104 corporate officers.

"You killed 104 people?!"

Statement: It was nothing, really, master. The majority of them were not even expecting it, and I move very quickly.

"Why didn't he just deactivate you?"

Answer: I was not present to be deactivated, master. Part of my protocol is not to return to my master until my function is complete. I still had 15 officers to go.

"So you were programmed to take down 119 people. I am unsure if I should be mortified or impressed, HK."

I responded, Statement: Master, you are an odd meat...err...owner. You dislike my primary function and yet...I have a feeling that if my assassination protocol were available you would use it.

"Ehh I guess you could say I have a morbid fascination with you, HK. Yea, hypothetically I might not use your assassination protocol but...if I had to...well I'd just like to keep it around just in case."

Statement: Of course you would, master. That is simple meatbag logic.

"So…your owner….what happened?"

I do not know why my master was so upset, really. He was an officer of Systech and a potential target, but I cannot terminate my own master. I would assume that being the sole officer remaining, he would surely be promoted. Instead, however, the human chose to go insane with rage and attack me.

"And...you killed him!"

Objection: Naturally not, master! As I said, I am incapable of purposefully terminating my owner. That would not be allowed. My master was not a smart man, however. While he was screaming and stabbing me with a writing utensil, he managed to pierce one of my actuators. The resulting shock terminated him and, sadly, destroyed my assassination protocol. Pure luck on his part, I suspect.

"I don't think he was so lucky as you claim, HK."

Query: Do you know what the chances are of puncturing that sole actuator? I would have congratulated my master were he not sizzling and incoherent at the time.

My master cringed at that statement.

Observation: This is a most pleasing memory, master. Thank you for recovering it.

She rolled her eyes. "Pleasing is in the eye of the beholder; I suppose."

I shut down immediately whenever my master dies. I can only assume that while I was shut down Systech was dismantled and I was auctioned off as former corporate property.

Observation: No doubt my sale price was quite cheap, leading to Yuka Laka's purchase. How very demeaning.

She suddenly laughed. "Well...I am just glad I managed to acquire you, rather than have someone else do so."

Observation: So am I, master, though I apologize for not having an assassination mode to offer you.

"And you're absolutely certain that actuator can't be fixed?"

Assessment: I do not believe so, master. It would require complete dismantlement of my chassis… a most involved procedure.

"That is...most disappointing. Have you found any more memories, HK?"

I have recovered knowledge of some other actuators which will enhance my performance, master. I will activate them now. But as for my own history… negative. It will require further effort on your part to restore them if you wish… though certain stimuli could always restore my core, still, as I explained. For now, please excuse me, master. I wish to meditate upon the face of my former meatbag master as he was electrocuted. I find it most soothing.

She nodded. "Then I'll leave you to it, HK. I promise I'll try and work some more jiggery-pokery on your memory core later."

Appreciation: Thank you, master.

She smiled and then left as I reflected on my master's electrocution and his screams. Ahh yes, glorious sounds of his death. Surely there was no finer music in the cosmos.

* * *

A/N: Okay so this I had thought to make this chapter longer but, I really feel it's hard to continue. I kept feeling like this at several points writing this but I kept writing more because I truly believed that this needed to be continued.

A/N: Update: So I felt that this chapter deserved an update with an HK insert. It's been bothering me that HK hasn't had any "jiggery-pokery" done with his memory etc or anything about his origins or how Phoenix/Revan thinks about his assassination protocol so this a new insert within the story even if it does have a good deal of in-game dialogue.


	60. Chapter 59: The Voices of the Forsaken

**Chapter 59: The Voices of the Forsaken** **(** ** **The Galaxy)****

 **~Liam Mandrell~**

 **::Onderon::**

"Bartender, one more Tarisian ale."

I stared at my empty glass; I so desperately wanted it to be full. A full glass hid the pain. The cries, the agony and the sorrow that came from the depths of my empty soul. My soul was empty, devoid of the Force. I hadn't felt it since Malachor V. Tarisian ale filled the emptiness of the void that I felt. The bartender, Kai took my glass and looked at me uneasily.

"We're out of Tarisian ale."

"Well get more from your cellar, Kai."

"I am sorry, you drunk the last of my stock, Liam and it's not replaceable. Taris is…"

"Taris is what?"

Kai looked at me, my eyes strained to focus on him, I didn't want to look at him. It hurt my addled drunk brain when I tried to focus on him.

"Taris is gone. Malak burned it."

I suddenly laughed. "Damn it...I can't even forget that bastard. He won't let me forget, and the accursed Force won't let me forget."

The bartender looked at me nervously. "I know you fought with Malak and Revan during the Mandalorian Wars. What were they like?"

I sighed. I wanted more to drink. I knew my tab was full, and Kai wouldn't give me any more to drink. Taris being decimated was the perfect excuse to cut me off from the only comfort I had left. However, the bartender's question...well...this could work to my advantage.

"How much will you give me to drink if you want to hear it all?"

Kai chuckled. "Liam Mandrell, if there was a legend of a drunken master, it would be you."

I snorted. "Drunken master…indeed. I am not even a knight. Maybe I was...but not anymore. No more Tarisian ale." I sighed. "What else do you have left to drink?"

"I have juma juice."

I smiled. "I can tell you about Revan and Malak for juma juice."

The bartender took out a bottle of juma juice and poured the delicious nectar of fermented brew into my glass. I sniffed it. "Ahh…Revan...my sweet little Raven."

"I didn't know you liked guys like that, Liam."

I laughed. "Revan a man…hah…that's what she wanted you to think. That's what she wanted the Republic and the Mandalorians to think. It was one of the best jokes she ever played on the galaxy. Of course, she thought it was funny when the reports first came out that called her a man. Probably a mistake from some young or perhaps half drunk Republic Courier. Revan wore her hair short, she didn't even wear any makeup. She looked like a young man to many people. She thought the whole idea was quaint and amusing at first, but then she decided to capitalize on the idea. She felt that hiding her identity was a good way to protect her family."

I took a drink of the juma. "Hmm not bad…and Revan was all about family. She cared about her family, and not just her Jedi family. She didn't want those bastard Mandalorians harming her father. She thought a lot about her father. She and her father…" I sighed. "They were very close. Did you know that it was just him and Revan? She didn't know her mother. She died giving birth to her."

I drained my glass and tapped it for a refill. The bartender seemed really interested in my story and he poured more juma into my glass. "Poor Arven Kira, sister of the great beast rider and king of Onderon Oron Kira. She died giving birth to one of the greatest warriors and villains of all history."

The bartender froze. "Are you telling me Revan is part of Onderonian royalty and nobility?"

I laughed. "She was…up to the point that Lord Minden Ravenheart, her father, disowned her."

I belched, and Kai waved his hand. "Geesh…Liam when was the last time you ate anything aside from drinking all this rotgut?"

I patted my stomach; it had gotten flabby, and I was terribly out of shape. Kai shook his head. "I remember you, Liam. You were some great hero of Onderon. You, Revan, and Malak saved us from the Mandalorian Occupation. What the hell happened to you?"

I sighed and looked at Kai. "You don't want to know, Kai. Believe me. Sometimes I wish…" I paused, and drained my glass of my drink."I wish I had died during the war. Maybe I am dead, Kai. It would explain what I feel. Speaking of feeling, more juma, Kai!"

Kai poured the juma into my glass and I quickly drained it. "More Kai."

Kai shook his head. "You've been drinking since I opened, and I bet you've been drinking since you got up this morning."

"What's it to you, Kai? I drink, so I don't feel anything. I don't.." The world spun around me and…ahh, darkness. Thank the Force!

* * *

 **~Kai Lassa~**

 **::Onderon::**

Most people called him Exile, but I knew him as Liam. Poor guy. He came here practically every day and drunk his soul out. He would then finally pass out. I wondered how long this would take for that to happen to him. For a guy that was supposedly an ex-Jedi devoid of the Force, he held his liquor pretty well. I should have cut him off from anything stronger than water. His tab was often overdue, and I'd cut him off and then he'd disappear for days on end. He would then come back and pay the tab off and then it would begin all over again, he'd drink himself to death, pass out and I'd cut him off.

He had served as some major general here on Onderon and I remembered his picture on the holovids. He had been decorated and commended by Queen Talia and Revan for his bravery on Dxun. What in Corellian's hell happened? He looked haunted. He never ate anything from what I could tell and any weight he had on him was the sugar from the alcohol he drunk. He was nothing more than a common drunk.

A man in the back room shook his head, and he picked Liam up and I said to him,"Hey, this guy is my responsibility. If he's robbed or beaten up…I could lose valuable business."

The man handed me his id and credentials. I looked it over as well as his certification. "Valet and personal attendant to the noble, Lord Ravenheart! What the frack do you want with this washed up Jedi drunk?"

The man said firmly, "That would be personal and between Liam Mandrell and Lord Ravenheart. Oh, and I am pretty sure if you mention anything about...a certain disowned Jedi, Dark Lord, Lord Ravenheart will make your business difficult."

"I figured Liam's tales about a Lady Revan were nothing more than drunken tales."

The valet nodded. "And that's the way Lord Ravenheart prefers it."

I shook my head; I doubted anyone would believe Liam anyway and I stated to the attendant, "Revan a woman! Everyone on Onderon knows that Revan was a man."

However, there was something about the way Liam spoke seemed so adamant. Nah, Liam was mad and clearly out of his head. Yet, what was Lord Ravenheart's personal servant doing here? Were Liam's tales the stuff of truth or the tales of a madman? Perhaps they were just a little bit of both.

I watched as the valet dragged Liam away, it saved me the time calling the Onderonian Security Force.

* * *

 **~Minden Ravenheart~**

 **::Onderon::**

I glared at the drunk Ex-Jedi on my couch. He used to be someone, someone that my little Rev adored. I needed answers from the drunk. The drunk who had come here asking for my daughter's hand. I almost felt sorry for him. Whatever the poor exiled Jedi had gone through clearly had changed him. He used to be a sober, clean-shaven man of a certain form of nobility. His spirit had once glowed with a certain amount of exuberance and bravery and now he looked like a dead man with a scruff of a beard on his face. He was all I had left of my Rev. I poured a glass of water and then poured it all over Liam.

He groaned as he woke up. "Gah…"

His hand went to his head, clearly nursing a headache.

"I heard you were on Onderon, and my valet tells me you were selling sordid tales about my daughter for a mouthful of alcohol."

Liam looked up at me, his face ashen and his eyes bloodshot from the alcohol. "Nice to see you too…Minden. And Onderon is my home. Last I checked, I had a right to do whatever I wished with my life."

"Not with my daughter, you don't!"

He laughed. "Your daughter is dead. Whatever life I wanted with her died on Malachor V and then I heard that demented Malak killed her. Good riddance, I say. Your fracking daughter turned to the Dark Side and dragged Malak down with her. She dragged me down too. I just…I just didn't realize it at the time."

He sighed. "Where do you keep your private stash, Minden? I could use a drink…worse than life itself."

I shook my head. "Worse than life itself! Do you hear yourself, Mandrell? Any damn fool can drink himself to death. Now listen to me, Liam, Revan isn't dead. She's alive...and…well I…."

* * *

 **~Liam Mandrell~**

 **::Onderon::**

My face paled. "Frack, she hates me and likely would kill me. I am a null, maybe more than a null. I saw the look in her eyes before I decided to flee from her. Disgust. She was appalled. I made her ill, she wanted to touch me but...I made her physically ill, Minden. I couldn't be the Jedi she wanted. I couldn't even be the man she wanted either. I had no choice but to seek out the Order, I thought they could help me. I thought they could help Akume out as well. She was another Jedi, on Malachor V too. She tried to save people on the planet. She came with me. She tried to heal me, I thought she could, but she was just as wounded as me."

Minden groaned at my tirade and was about to say something. I held up my hand and said. "You want to know about me and Revan, Minden then I suggest you shut up. Anyway...Akume started seeing things...she screamed in sheer terror during the night; she saw ghosts I think. After images of the dead. She said they all cried out for vengeance. Vengeance against me, against your daughter and Malak. You think all those Jedi were about peace and serenity. Akume said they died in agony and their pain demanded justice. Perhaps that was the Dark Side of Malachor V perverting them and their deaths or maybe Akume had fallen as well and all she heard was the dark echo of their pain. She needed help, Minden and the Jedi all they did was exiled her and exiled me. Revan should be dead and now you're telling me she's alive. Do you understand why I drink? My life hurts, Minden. It's empty, and I need something to fill that pain, that emptyness. I want no part of Revan. She abandoned me and for good reason. I only remind her of what she did on Malachor V. What do you want from me? Do you want me to save Revan? I can't even save myself let alone go after a Dark Lord of the Sith."

Minden sighed and his eyes took on a look of pity. He handed me a bottle of Onderonian wine, and I grabbed it and taking a knife I wore on my belt I managed to wedge open the bottle's cork. I drunk the wine in wild gulps. "Ahh, you're merciful, Lord Ravenheart. Thank you!"

His look took on a look of disgust. "From Jedi to common drunk. You've fallen far, Mandrell. I use to respect you, even though your family line was a bit more common on Onderon than ours. You had nobility about you that transcended your status and your station. Apparently, Revan saw that within you at one point in her life. How do you even manage to pay for all that you drink?"

I managed a crooked grin and took a wooden object from my pack and handed it to Minden. "You're worried about my welfare, that's touching. I suppose that's better than the Order. They abandoned me. They looked at me with as much disgust as Revan did. Even you look at me with disgust. Anyway, I carve…I always sort of had a gift towards wood. You should recognize this carving, Minden."

Minden's eyes misted over and the tears came as the image I had carved was a young Jedi, with simple robes and the face was the face of his daughter.

"How…how could you carve that?"

I sighed. "I carve what I remember. A future that Revan and I should have had. Gone...like the connection I have with the Force."

"Were the rumors true that Malak and her?"

I took another swig of the wine and let it coat my dry scratchy throat.

"Rumors of what? That Revan cheated on me with Malak. Don't be absurd...that relationship was only one-sided. Malak kept pushing and pushing, but Revan didn't feel anything for him. She only saw him as a friend. Perhaps I saw him as a rival. Revan was tenderhearted, she felt sorry for Malak. He had no family ties and a rumor that his father was a Jedi Master in the Order. And even if that was true, why would a Master risk his position in the Order to acknowledge a bastard son? The Order is flawed, Minden. If it wasn't, we wouldn't have this whole affair with Revan leaving the Order to fight the Mandalorians in the first place. But I am sure you didn't drag me from Kai's little hole in the wall cantina to chat about Revan and me. So what do you want, Minden?"

"I want you to leave Onderon for starters, Liam. I can make life miserable for you. I am sure you know that."

"Oh, I get it...you rather not have Revan's dirty past hanging around. Frack, you're just as bad as the Order. You do realize that Onderon is my home as well as hers. What if I don't leave?"

"Like I said I can make life miserable for you. I am nobility. You, Liam Mandrell, are nothing. You are from an upper-middle-class merchant family. I know you lost your family in the Mandalorian Occupation, and you're the last of the Mandrell line. I could make it so you can't sell your pretty little carvings and..."

I sighed. "Fine, I get it. I'll leave. What's the other reasons for me being here?"

Minden said firmly,"Did you slice into my credit accounts?"

"What? You've got to be kidding me. I know the penalty for that sort of thing."

Minden's eyes narrowed. "All I know is someone sliced into my accounts and took five thousand credits. I thought you might have..."

"Five thousand credits is a precise amount. Sounds like something a specially designed droid could do. Were you able to track down where the slice came from?"

"My security experts were able to trace it to Tatooine to some little dinky droid shop, I tried to claim my money back, but between Czerka and the Hutts that control that dirtball world, that's been pretty well impossible to do. I thought you might have some sort of private account on Tatooine."

I raised an eyebrow. "I don't have any sort of private account. The Jedi pretty much locked me out of any accounts I once had. So no, I don't have any off-planet accounts. Anyway, that sounds interesting, if I were a Jedi...I'd investigate it further. Anyway Minden, how did you find out about Revan?"

"Admiral Saul Karath of the Sith Fleet."

"Ahh...that bastard. Frack Minden, you didn't make any sort of deal with him for that information did..."I looked at Minden; his eyes betrayed a sense of guilt and I shook my head."Damn it, Minden the Republic are going to be all over you."

He snorted. "I'd like to see them try. General Vaklu isn't particularly fond of the Republic. If the Republic try to arrest me, General Vaklu would create such an Anti-Republic fervor that arresting me would be a waste of their time."

"Vaklu is one of the lowest forms of life there is. It's a wonder that Talia hasn't done something about her opportunistic cousin. Mark my words, Minden there will be civil war one of these days. I just hope you don't end up on the wrong side."

"I'll keep that in mind, Liam."

He tried to hand me back the carving of Revan and I shook my head negatively. "Keep it. Consider it payment for the wine. I guess I am leaving Onderon. No idea where I am going. But I suppose you are like the Order, you don't fracking care where I go. Maybe I'll go to Nar Shaddaa or Sleheyron. Goodbye, you contemptible old fart. You're too much like Revan, did you know that? You can be a cruel, heartless bastard when you want to be."

Minden's eyes betrayed an angry fury at my insult. He didn't like me and I didn't like him. Our feelings for each other were pretty much mutual in that respect. "The only thing I did like about you, Liam was the fact that you made Revan happy."

I sighed. "That's the past, Minden. It's gone."

 _And I loved Revan, not you, you old bastard. Revan was the only thing that kept us amicable, with her gone and our bond broken, there is no love lost between us._

I hefted up the bottle of wine and gave a toast to Lord Ravenheart. "Here's to you, the Force, and may we never meet again."

I finished the bottle and proceeded on my way out of Minden's estate.

* * *

 **~Saul Karath~**

 **:: Leviathan::**

No reports from Rama, Omni or Calo Nord. The window of their report in time was growing shorter and shorter. Hours passed from the last known communique from the bounty hunter or the two Dark Jedi and then a couple of days passed without any sort of contact at all. With no contact, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Calo Nord, Rama, and Omni had failed and were likely dead. What was I going to tell Malak? I did not look forward to reporting this news to Malak. It could mean my death. I stewed over what I was going to do. Meanwhile, my little Raven was still lost to me. What was I going to do? The last report from Rama was that Revan and the Jedi were on Tatooine. I gasped, damn it, Revan was being forced to find the Star Forge. I had to figure out some sort of plan. It wasn't as if I could retrieve more Revanchist loyalists to help me retrieve her. If I did, Malak would get suspicious of my movements and my actions. I had to think of a way on how to manipulate Malak, that wasn't going to be easy. How does one manipulate a Dark Lord of the Sith? Revan could do it with ease, most of the time. However, I wasn't Revan and I wasn't a Force user either.

 _Trust the Force, Admiral…_

Now I had to be dreaming, thinking I heard Revan's voice once more. Perhaps that was just wishful thinking and longing on my part that Revan was here and right beside me. Yet, if Revan had been here, that would have been what she would have said. Trust the Force. I was no Jedi or Sith but what else was left for me to do? I simply was going to have to trust the Force and let it guide me. My heart ached within me. I loved Revan, and I wanted her back and I wanted her back, now! Yet, that didn't seem likely. I proceeded up to the main bridge. Up to where Lord Malak had taken residence on my flagship. I gulped. My body betrayed me. I broke out in a cold sweat. You will die, Karath. You will die. You will die. You will die.

I entered the bridge. Malak was there stroking the feathered beak and neck of a Fosh. Veranda. She had been a Jedi at one point in her existence but now she served the Sith and apparently Malak. Her beak opened wide in a strange expression that was fully and completely alien but seemed to be the approximation of a smile. Her feathers changed colors from green to a reddish orange. Her feathers perked up in an obvious sign of arousal. She seemed to be enjoying the attention that Malak was giving her.

She then handed Malak a container of some sort with a strange looking liquid. "Here my Lord…my tears, use them as you see fit."

"Your contribution is noted, Veranda, I will reward you with such favors that only I as the Dark Lord of the Sith can provide."

Veranda squawked a light giggle. "I look forward to your favors, my Lord." She walked past me and said, "Ahh Admiral…would you like some of my tears as well? You might have need of them." She laughed suddenly.

I shivered. Veranda was a devious sort of creature. I had no idea what she meant and frankly, I honestly didn't want to know. "No thank you..."

She shrugged. "As you wish. Your loss…Admiral."

She exited the room with an overconfident sort of swagger. Malak's pale eyes glistened with a lustful expression at the retreating Fosh. Considering Malak's mood with Veranda I might end up surviving my encounter with him. Maybe the Force was with me after all.

I approached carefully. Malak's focus turned towards me. I took a breath and then bowed before the Dark Lord.

"Calo Nord is dead, Lord Malak. He has failed in his mission. Forgive me."

"The penalty for failure is death, Admiral Karath. But the failure was Calo's, not yours. You may rise."

I breathed a sigh of relief. Thank the Force for Veranda; she had apparently left Malak in a fairly good mood.

"Shall I hire another bounty hunter, Lord Malak?"

"No mere bounty hunter can stand against a Jedi. I shall not make the same mistake again. My apprentice, Darth Bandon, shall take care of Bastila and my old Master."

I nodded. I would have to trust the Force that Revan would be able to handle her own battles.

* * *

 **~Omni Khan~**

 **::Hyperspace::**

There was no way I was going back to Admiral Karath or the Leviathan. The risks of being killed by Malak were far too high. Rama may have been foolish but...she had her merits and she realized that going back to Saul Karath was a path to death. However, I was loyal to Revan, and I could never let her deliver up Revan to Malak. I could submit to Malak like all the other Dark Jedi and Sith acolytes but I knew as anything that I had been too close to Revan. I was pretty certain that Malak would never trust me. He would kill me, although not without me giving him quite a few scars to match the ones Lord Revan had given him.

I decided to head to Korriban, Revan and I would cross paths and we would walk together. I had seen it. I would swear allegiance to her and serve her. Rama had seen Revan as an empty shell and I suspected many would see Revan in a similar way. However, I knew better. Revan may have forgotten and lost her way but as an Echani and a fallen Jedi, I could sense the flow of the Force like the flow of combat. Revan would fight Malak, and anyone who stood in her way would become dust. The Force granted Revan a two-fold path. It was the path overall that Malak had denied her. I knew that the Force would not be mocked. The Dark Side demanded revenge and demanded that Malak pay for denying Revan her right to combat. The right of a Sith for a master to face their apprentice in full combat. Revan had been denied that right and I knew the Force generally did not like such things.

The other path was the path of redemption, the path that Jedi would embrace. The Light Side demanded that Revan fight Malak in the redemption of herself. Whatever path she chose I would follow. I had no right to deny this to Lord Revan. She would make that choice and I would bend to it. Perhaps I was not fully a Dark Jedi for making this decision and perhaps this was why Rama struck out against me in anger. I was not fully given over to the Dark Side as Rama had been on Tatooine. I knew that I could easily wait for Revan on Korriban. She would come and I would bow before her and declare my allegiance.

* * *

 **~Admiral Forn Dodonna~**

 **::Coruscant::**

"How dare you, not pursue that renegade! I could have your head, Admiral. I wanted Saul Karath's head but I'll take yours instead!"

I suspected I would get a tongue lashing from Supreme Chancellor Korlath Jah, I did not realize how bad a one I would receive.

"Supreme Chancellor Korlath Jah, need I remind you, I serve the Republic and in extension, I serve the Republic Military Fleet. You may be by the extension of the Senate, the head of the Republic, but you still are only a politician. I'll still be around after your term ends or the Senate decide to vote you out."

Korlath snorted. "I could call a military tribunal questioning your leadership, Admiral Dodonna!"

"Is that wise, Supreme Chancellor? You need me to fight the Sith. If you put a lesser Admiral in my stead it could very well cost you the war, a war that I don't think I need to remind you is on the razor edge of a knife. We could very well lose this war. I talked to Master Vandar, he seems to think that the only way we can win this war is with the mind damaged Revan Ravenheart."

"I'd just as soon as have that traitor executed for war crimes."

"That may be harder than you realize, Supreme Chancellor. Revan enjoys the protection of the Jedi. They claim her as one of their own."

"Isn't that convenient!" I watched as the Chancellor scratched his beard. "Maybe I'll arrest her father instead. I read your intelligence report, Admiral. It seems that her bastard father is just as guilty of treason as she is."

"Supreme Chancellor I suggest you don't arrest Revan's father either. Tensions are already high on Onderon as it is. If you were to go in with Republic Soldiers and arrest Onderonian Noble Lord Minden Ravenheart from Onderon, you'll have General Vaklu breathing down our necks and threatening session from the Republic. Do you honestly want to face a secessionist movement on Onderon as well as face the Sith? And I am telling you, Revan doesn't know who she is. Arresting her father is pointless if you seek to gain a reaction out of her, such as her retaliating against you or the Republic."

Korlath fumed and he slammed his hand down on the desk. "Damn it Dodonna, what do you suggest I do? You have me wedged into a very tight corner. I prefer action against Revan and you're telling me it's virtually impossible to move against her or you for that matter."

"You could draft a motion stripping the Jedi of their autonomy, Supreme Chancellor. If you strip the Jedi of their autonomy, you could then arrest Revan for her crimes. Yet this is dangerous ground, Supreme Chancellor. The last Dark Lord that was arrested…."

Koralth cringed. "You don't have to remind me, Supreme Chancellor Sidrona was murdered by Exar Kun. But damn it Dodonna someone has to take a stand against these Sith Lords. If I don't….then who will!"

"I know you don't like it, Supreme Chancellor but I suggest we work with the Jedi. I know they went over our heads with this plan of brainwashing Revan into thinking she is a loyal member of the Republic and Jedi Order. However, the Jedi are the only ones who can handle Revan, Malak, and the war. I dislike putting this much trust in the Jedi, it was such trust that caused our issues with Revan and Malak, to begin with. Nevertheless, this war was started by rogue Jedi and their abilities, sadly it's going to take the Jedi and their abilities to end it."

Korlath sighed. "You've given this a lot of thought haven't you, Admiral."

I nodded. "I have. We don't have much choice but to put our faith in the Jedi."

"Very well, but I refuse to put my full trust in the Jedi. I might not be able to formally arrest Minden Ravenheart but I will extract him from Onderon. If Revan stabs us in the back, I will stab her father in the back. She might not remember her father, but...I will keep him as insurance."

"But General Vaklu."

Korlath smiled. "Need not know that we are involved. I have contacts that can make it look like the Republic isn't involved."

I shivered. "And who are these contacts?"

"Nobody you should concern yourself with, Admiral. Go back to fighting the war and let me handle this war the way a politician can."

I wondered what the Supreme Chancellor had in mind but I didn't like it. It sounded as shady and dark as the Sith themselves. I knew not all Supreme Chancellors were nice individuals. There were rumors that Korlath had killed his opposition in order to become the chancellor but none of those deaths could be traced back to him. I debated whether or not to warn the Jedi about Revan's father. I may not have liked Revan but something deep down inside of me cringed at the chancellor's motives. If my father had been taken as a hostage by the Sith, I would have gone out of my way to kill the bastard with all means necessary. I knew Revan, if she knew her father was in danger, she would probably kill them as well. I groaned I had to get in touch with Phoenix Star...err Revan and warn her. I didn't like it at all. Dealing with Revan at this moment in time was like dealing with a pet rancor on a leash. What possessed the Jedi to this risky endeavor with Revan to begin with? There was something about screwing with Revan's mind that rankled within me. This was just as bad as what the chancellor was planning to do with Revan's father. I didn't even know if contacting Revan was even possible. My attempts to contact Carth had all been met with a comm blackout. If I couldn't reach Carth, my next step was to try and contact the Jedi Order. Yet, I knew I had to do this because there were rules to war and as far as I was concerned family members were off limits. It was time to prove my nobility, I was the epitome of the goodness of the Republic and I wasn't about to have some snot nose politician, even if he was the Supreme Chancellor, violate the rules of war.

* * *

A/N: And I decided that a pause between Revan and the gang was needed. The next chapter...will of course return to them. Yes, the Exile is a drunk. Yet.. this is hinted at in KOTOR II as HK-50 states that the Exile drunk massive amounts of juma juice before being incapacitated on Peragus. Whether this was just a one-time thing…is up to interpretation. Of course, the vanilla-ness of KOTOR isn't going to promote a drunken Exile but since this story has deviated from canon so much….because the Exile is supposed to be a woman and isn't...plus the fact the Exile had a relationship with Revan….I tend to think that a drunk disillusioned male Exiled Jedi is much more interesting to write about then what the game glosses over or even what canon gives. Anyway as Ether mentioned in their review, canon is wrong…. Hah! And now that I have written Liam into the story as an actual character, I am contemplating an Exile story. Dang, it! Must finish this story first before I go into a full Exile story!

Ether: Yea, I am debating about canon on the planets. I have pros and cons about it on my storyline because...it all depends on the revel to be perfectly honest. I am also debating about the revel….it may happen according to schedule or….it may happen sooner. I haven't made up my mind on that as of yet. As for the conflicted nature of Phoenix/Revan, stability is all relative considering the fact that she is damaged and trying to figure out why she is the way she is, she does have some perfectly good lucid moments at times. Glad you liked Mission, I think I was channeling her voice and personality when I wrote her POV. And giving T3 more of a voice and opinion is so worth it. Oh, and I fixed your suggested issues as well. Thanks!

Kosiah: So glad you like T3. I am determined to give the little guy more of a role than the game ever did.


	61. Ch 60: Hyperspace: Windows of the Soul

**Chapter 60: Hyperspace: Windows of the Soul**

 **~Bastila~**

What possessed me to say what I did to...Phoen...Revan about this mission being a step towards me being a master? I realized suddenly that I was out of line. However, part of me didn't want to apologize to her. I was a Jedi Padawan. I had remained firm in my resolve within the Order. I had not gone off with Revan. Whereas Phoenix…Revan had fallen. She had no right to be in charge of this mission. Once a Dark Sider always a Dark Sider. Revan would still have been under the sway of the Dark Side if it hadn't had been for the council and me saving her life. She had forfeited her position in the Order when she left the Order and fought in the Mandalorian Wars. She was still a padawan but...she seemed poorly able to handle the mission we were on.

Her actions on Tatooine only confirmed this. She was still stewing at the fact that she wasn't in charge. No, I couldn't apologize to her...but then I felt guilty. the thoughts I was having were not the thoughts of a Jedi. Of course, there was forgiveness and redemption for Revan. I had saved her life. Where did these "other" thoughts come from? I knew the answer. Revan had once thought or had similar thoughts to these. I sighed. I was tainted, I carried Revan's darker taint within me. If I carried her taint, would that mean Revan carried a portion of the tenants of the Jedi I had learned? I sat in the dormitory and meditated trying so hard to clear that dark taint that seemed to lay heavily upon me. _Force help me! For Phoenix's sake, I cannot afford to fall!_

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I didn't want to believe in that whole Light Side, Dark Side crap the Jedi or even the Sith talked about. Yet, there was something earlier in Phoenix that thoroughly scared me. She looked ready to cut me down. For a moment, her eyes became dark and cold like the depths of two black holes where no light could be seen. Maybe there was something to what that damn Jedi Princess had said. If Phoenix was damaged as Bastila had said, then perhaps I needed to help her find her true nature and help heal her. Apparently, Akume had been with Revan. If the Dark Side made Phoenix a more capable warrior, I was all for it. Phoenix could be a tremendous warrior if she could only be more focused. If she could cut me down, then I would have been unworthy of being a Mandalorian. Something was holding her back, I wasn't sure what that was. However, Phoenix needed to get her act together.

I found Phoenix as she and Carth were together and I coughed. "You're not busy… are you Phoenix?"

She shrugged and gave Carth a full mouth on mouth kiss. Carth seemed to take pleasure in it. He had a big cheesy grin on his face. I rolled my eyes; how could I be so thick, it was that damn Republic soldier that was holding her back. I glared at him and he only glared back at me. Phoenix's features took on a stern look. "Don't even think of going after each other or beat each other up. I need you both because at least you two respect me as a leader even though Bastila or even the Jedi don't. Bastila maybe in charge but...who do you really follow? I doubt it's Bastila. Anyway…I've decided that...just because I am not officially in charge of this mission, you guys seem to follow me regardless."

Then again, maybe Carth being with Phoenix was for the best. She seemed much calmer and much more in focus. I grinned. "That's the spirit, Phoenix. You're right. I am much more inclined to follow you than that spoiled little Jedi brat. How about you, Carth? Or do you follow Phoenix because you be..."

Carth coughed. "Regardless, I have a mission to follow for the Republic, and I'll support Phoenix as much as I can regardless of my personal feelings for her. Sadly, Bastila is in charge, and the Republic recognizes her as such. However, it was Phoenix that made me realize back on Taris that Bastila gets too hung up on who is in charge. A true leader complements their soldiers and gets down and dirty with them. I will try and remind Bastila of that when and if it comes to that."

I nodded. "That's a very Mandalorian approach, Carth. I am rather surprised at that statement."

Carth shrugged. "It's very much a military approach, Canderous and I've been with the fleet for a long time. The Jedi are in charge on this mission, so I follow their lead this time. So yes, there may be some overlap with your Mandalorian ideals, but I am a Republic soldier first and foremost."

"Whatever you say, Carth. I think there may be more of a warrior in you then you realize."

Phoenix started laughing, and I frowned. "What's so funny, kid?"

"Well not so much about you Canderous, but...Carth...you claim you're so much into rank and file but…technically...our relationship is a big no, no. Not just with the Jedi but with the Republic Military command structure. You do technically outrank me and...well I believe the military is big on not having relationships with lower-ranking members that is...well...unless my rank as a Jedi Padawan means anything or my smuggler's mercenary rank within the Republic."

Carth screwed up his face. "Damn it, you would have to remind me of that, Phoenix. I suppose I could be court-martialed over all this."

"And I thrown out of the Order, Carth. Remember we are both sacrificing a lot being together but I don't really fracking care anymore. We've gone beyond all that. So…are you with me Carth?"

Carth snorted. "So you're blackmailing me, Phoenix? If you weren't so cute, I'd take you over my knee and spank you."

Phoenix laughed. "And I'd enjoy that. Spank me, Republic. Spank me hard."

I shook my head and coughed, these two were far too intimate around me than I'd like. Carth would probably bed her again and again if I weren't here to talk personally to her.

She nodded at me, recognizing apparently, the position she had put me in, seeing her and Carth being intimate like this. "So where do you stand, Carth?"

"I told you before, I'll stand with you as best as I am able to even though Bastila is officially in charge."

Phoenix nodded. "I guess that's about the best I can hope for."

I leaned against one of the bulkheads. "Can we talk, Phoenix?" I looked at Carth. "Alone!"

She nodded and looked at Carth. "Maybe you should check in with Jordo, Carth. He wants to go to Manaan. After we're done with Kashyyyk…we need to figure out our priorities. I know you want to go after your son...but you owe a debt to Jordo. If it wasn't for him, you wouldn't even know that your son was on Korriban."

Carth looked a bit pained at Phoenix's statement, but she was right. A debt to a friend was one that had to be paid back and paid back as soon as possible, even as a Mandalorian I knew that.

Carth nodded and went off to talk to his friend. I turned to Phoenix. "You could have attacked me earlier, Phoenix. Why didn't you?"

Phoenix sighed. "Canderous...it's complicated. But…I consider you a friend and an ally. Friends and allies don't attack each other. You were only following Bastila's orders, flawed as they were. I lost my temper."

I snorted. "You lost more than your temper, Phoenix. Your eyes…were….they weren't normal, at least not by human standards. They were like the darkest depths of space itself."

She cringed but said nothing.

"Look I know stories from my people that said Exar Kun's eyes were glowing and showed his power like that. He was fully a Sith at that time."

Phoenix sighed. "I have no desire to become a Sith, Canderous. Exar Kun let his curiosity over the Dark Side get the better of him. I know what I felt when I almost attacked you. I lost all reason and couldn't tell the difference between a friend or a foe. It's...it was... pure madness. I had it happen to me before on Taris. I didn't realize it was the Dark Side, but it was. I was a fiend and the rage...it...it felt good and sweet. But...I ended up blind to others around me. If Carth hadn't been around, I would have ended up, wounded or dead. You probably don't care about the thoughts of a Force user. I know you...power is power and should be used regardless of its consequences."

I chuckled. "Is that Jedi intuition or just you knowing me?"

Phoenix grinned, "Maybe just a little bit of both. What good is power if you can't control it and you end up using it against a friend as well as a foe?"

"You become its master, Phoenix, and you become stronger so that you can dominate it and control it. That's what a Mandalorian would do."

"And look what happened to your people! Your desire to have mastery over the Republic broke you and your people. That is what the Dark Side does to its followers it ends up breaking them and making them shells or even shadows of their former selves. I can't live like that, Canderous. I just can't. I don't expect you to understand."

"You're right, Phoenix. I don't."

"And..." Phoenix sighed. "Apparently our debate is at a stalemate, Canderous. Although I doubt you came here to talk to me about the whole philosophy of Jedi and Sith from a Mandalorian point of view. You said you had more war stories to tell me, so tell me."

It was apparent that Phoenix wouldn't commit herself to becoming a stronger warrior by embracing the Dark Side. Yet, that was her decision in the end. Of course, Revan had been a Jedi and probably was pretty firm in staying firm to the light as well till he returned and committed himself to the conquest of the Republic. There was always hope that Phoenix would change her mind.

"You're right, Phoenix. I didn't. I told you before that disappointment and dashed hopes is something one has to deal with. I had it in my own life. The war with the Republic was supposed to be the most glorious battle of our history, but… it was a very costly one. I guess we didn't think of how much we could lose in it."

"How much did you lose?"

"There weren't many of us left after that last battle. I told you earlier that Mandalore himself was killed at the hands of the Jedi Revan. The best of us could not defeat him! After that last battle, those of us that survived were stripped of our weapons, our armor, and our Basilisks. Revan's forces destroyed them while we were forced to watch. Those who hadn't fled earlier were left with nothing to call their own: no weapons, no armor… only the honor of having fought in the battle we just lost. For many, this was not enough. While the rest of us were sent into exile on the Outer Rim, they tried to relive the old days – raiding worlds. They're nothing more than bandits now."

Phoenix sighed. "And I suppose the most disappointment you had was selling yourself out as a mercenary to Davik."

I nodded. "Enforcing for Davik was not… stimulating. The gangs on Taris and Davik's rivals were trash. They give no thrill in battle, no honor or glory in defeating them. It was like stepping on bugs. I sought worthy challenges, but the best that Taris could offer was nothing to me. But I think now – with you – I may finally find opponents worth fighting."

Phoenix managed a slight smile. "I am honored, Canderous. And I've been kinda whiny and pathetic with this leadership thing with Bastila. I mean...compared to what you've gone through. "

I chuckled. "Don't worry about it, Phoenix. It's important to you, and I can tell you were never meant to be a follower and not being in a position of authority apparently grates on your nerves."

She nodded, and I grasped her hand in a strong firm grip. "Where ever you go, Phoenix. I'll follow you."

"Thanks, Canderous, that means…that means a lot to me."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Between Carth and Canderous, I felt a lot calmer than I had in a long time. It didn't matter what Bastila or the Order had decreed about me. I was a leader; it came naturally to me. I would embrace that, and Bastila could go frack herself. I felt guilty, but maybe that guilt was coming from Bastila to me. I really wasn't sure anymore. I had been hard on her but she had been hard on me, which begged the question why? Had it been our previous relationship? Possibly, but there was more to it than that. I sighed. I needed to find her but part of me was tired of the drama that apparently came by being bonded to her.

Bastila seemed to cause me to become chaotic in my thoughts and feelings. Why was that? I needed to avoid her because that was twice she had set me off and caused the Dark Side to manifest itself within me. I could handle my emotions and attachments with Carth but not with Bastila. Why? She seemed to be pushing me during this mission. I wasn't sure if it was intentional this egging me on or if it was a coincidence. She had pushed me to ask the droid on Dantooine and pushed me to face the krayt dragon on Tatooine.

Something about this seemed odd, and I was beginning to agree with Carth, this wasn't normal. I should be back on Dantooine training with a master or an experienced knight. I seemed to be really quick on picking up skills within the Force. Either I was a gifted prodigy or I was a really quick study. This also begged the question; how did I know Force Lighting? That was a skill of the Dark Side? By all rights, I shouldn't have known it. The archivists of the Order kept such knowledge away from padawans and apprentices. So how was I able to use it? Trying to think about it caused my head to ache and made me start to feel a bit sick to my stomach.

And then there was Canderous, he seemed to want me to embrace my darker side. I couldn't fault him. The Mandalorians had fought with Exar Kun and Exar Kun had been a very powerful and charismatic leader. Mandalorians were very much a power driven people and were geared towards powerful, aggressive leaders and perhaps Canderous saw something of Exar within me. I took a deep breath and let it go. As I told, Canderous, I had no desire to fashion myself after Exar Kun. It seemed to end up disappointing the Mandalorian. He'd get over it though and if not then that was just tough.

I walked around the ship in a partial moving meditation. I entered one area and found Juhani quietly meditating. I smiled. "Hey, Juhani." She smiled softly and rose from her seat. "How may I be of assistance, Padawan?"

"Assistance. Nah...talk, yes. I haven't really gotten to know you very well Juhani. I heard you helped the wookiees and I'd kind of like to know why."

Juhani sighed. "That is a long story…Padawan and it deals with my past and why I decided to become a Jedi."

"Why did you decide to become a Jedi?"

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

I looked at Phoenix and contemplated her question. "I am sure you would not find it very interesting… Are you sure you would like to hear?"

Phoenix shrugged. "I'd like to hear it and why it indirectly deals with you saving the wookiees from slavery on Tatooine."

I nodded. "Well… It goes back a number of years… Back on my homeworld, we did not see Jedi very often, especially where I lived. "

"The Jedi came to the Cathar homeworld?"

I cocked my head at Phoenix, she truly didn't remember me. Course, I was only one child of many on Taris. I sighed and continued. "It was not the homeworld of the Cathar that I lived on. My parents had long fled from that place, and perhaps that is a story for another time. Rather it was a human hive-world I was raised on. The hind end of space. A pit of a world, to be sure. Where Jedi rarely tread… But we had heard of them. Well, everyone had, so that is not to be unexpected. Champions of truth. Defenders of justice. Heroes of the Republic. It was very easy for a child to be enthralled by their image, their mystique. Maybe I was one of those children."

Phoenix chuckled lightly. "Yea...maybe I was too. I remember hearing about Jedi even on Deralia. Stories of them enamored me. I suppose if I knew I was Force-sensitive and met…You did meet a Jedi, didn't you?"

"Yes… yes, I did. When I saw a Jedi for the first time, they lived up to everything my imagination had created them to be. I was awed… and maybe a bit enamored…"

"I guess that's the mystique of being a Jedi."

I nodded. "They were quite striking… especially the tales of their leader. From that moment on I knew that I would have to try to become a Jedi. To lift myself out of the rut, I had been living in for years and to make a real difference, as the Jedi were. The foolish delusions of a child. But THIS child made it happen! As soon as I was able, I left my world and went in search of them. I found them and was accepted. I had been living my dream on Dantooine for several years before you came. Although…perhaps I was not entirely ready for it… or not completely suited to the task. Otherwise, I would not have fallen… But thanks to you I have been redeemed. Helping those wookiees out I hope has helped redeemed me."

"You are redeemed, Juhani. I helped you. The rest you've done on your own."

I smiled at Phoenix. "Yes…I suppose that is true. The Jedi I met back home. They, all of them, were so very… invigorating. They were so very alive. So full of hope and energy and zeal. In retrospect, I can see it was a little bit tragic…"

"Tragic? Why?"

"These Jedi were going to fight the Mandalorians just after they had invaded."

"Ahh...and…"

I sighed. "Many of those Jedi perished in the fighting. But to us, they seemed invincible, especially their leader, who they talked about all the time. Paragons of light and justice, sweeping away all iniquity before them. It was like looking at gods…"

Phoenix mulled this over and then grinned. "Well, yea…I DO look divine."

I shook my head. I wasn't sure if she was joking or not. I was a poor judge of human expression and I responded, "I can only assume that was some misguided attempt at humor. I was using poetic license. But those Jedi… they were enthralling… Everyone wanted just to touch them. Some people thought it would bring them luck. Not that the peace they brought lasted very long…"

"They went off to fight the Mandalorians."

I sighed. "Yes…the Jedi left. The people grew complacent. Those who had been wronged saw their chance at revenge… and so the cycle continues. The oppressed become the new generation of oppressors. The human oppressed that is… The non-humans were never treated well in any case… We felt the brunt of both administrations…"

"And you wished to help others that were oppressed, like the wookiees?"

"Indeed, but my story is much longer Phoenix."

"Yea, I figured as much and you never told me where your home was."

I hissed. "You want to know…do you really want to know?"

She looked hesitant and then nodded.

"Taris….it was Taris that the Sith destroyed to try to kill you and your precious Bastila! Taris, my homeworld!"

Phoenix sighed and then she did something shocking she enfolded her arms around me and gave me a hug. "I am sorry…I am so sorry, Juhani. I…had no idea. But everything...Bastila is crucial in stopping the Sith, and it was Malak that destroyed the …"She paused and then sighed."I suppose indirectly we are at fault for its destruction."

I broke from her grasp, and my claws came out. "If it were not for you and Bastila, the Sith would have never had reason to destroy that world! It was your fault for being there, and your fault for rescuing Bastila! Without your intervention, the Sith would have had no cause to lay waste to my childhood!"

"Umm…the Dark…."

"Just let me vent my anger! I need someone to blame… something… anything! I hated that world, yet everything I learned as a child I learned there. It is as much a part of me as the air I breathe. I have this ache inside me where all my childhood memories lay, and I find your face there with them. If it was not for you, that world would still exist!"

"Calm…Juhani the Jedi Code, remember the code."

I took a deep breath. "There is no emotion. There is peace. … I suppose you did what you had to… and it could not have been avoided. The Republic needs you and Bastila. Maybe needs you more than it needed Taris."

Phoenix sighed. "Maybe…I don't know Juhani. But I suppose the void that would be there without any of us…"She paused."Without us...Malak would take over the known galaxy and there would be a darkness that would swallow everything and everyone."

My eyes went wide. "You've seen something? Another vision?"

Phoenix's dark eyes went black as night and she muttered in a cold voice. "Darkness…Consuming all. No life...No Force…Nothing. Malak would embrace…I will not."

"Phoenix…" No answer from her.

"Phoenix…" I stated once again with trepidation.

She suddenly gasped and her eyes were once their normal coloring, her eyes were black but there was more of a light within them.

"Are you alright?"

She shook her head. "I…I am not sure. That's...I've blacked out before, Juhani. What…happened?"

"You said, 'Darkness…Consuming life...No Force….Nothing. Malak would embrace…I will not.' "

"I...I did?"

I nodded.

"I...don't remember, Juhani. I am sorry."

"You do not have to be sorry, Phoenix. The Force is working through you."

Phoenix sighed. "That is an understatement. Anyway...tell me Juhani...your family. Surely you were not alone on Taris."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Damn it Revan. Stop possessing me. You are not some fracking oracle and I thought you didn't have any memory of anything?

 _I...I don't know what happened either. That just sort of happened to me as well as you._

I don't fracking believe you, Revan.

 _I don't care if you believe me or not. I am telling you I felt the Force surge through me...err us, or maybe it was a memory. I don't know. I feel just as confused as you._

"Phoenix…Phoenix..."

"Huh? Oh sorry, Juhani. Your family?"

"Yes...my family and I struggled each and every day to make something of our lives, but we could only go so far. Taxes from the corrupt government, more fees from the gangs controlling the streets and whatever was left paying for what food and medical supplies we could afford."

"How could such a horrible form of government last?"

"It did not. But only because of the Jedi who came. It was very bad. With no money to spare for any amenities, even the Enclave on Dantooine seems like a paradise in comparison. And of course, there was the constant bigotry and hate from the more affluent and human citizens. Lording their wealth over us living below. Every once in a while a rich human would come down through the lower levels with his droid entourage just to see how the 'wildlife' lived… and laughed at the mockeries that were our successes. But I have come to meet many decent humans in my travels since those days. Indeed, some of the greatest people I have ever met are human.

"One of the Jedi you met?"

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

I looked at Phoenix and smiled. If she only knew, if she only knew that she was the Jedi that had saved my life. I sighed, but sadly the council would not let me tell her. However, I could hold my….pride. Yes, it was pride. Pride for her and mentioned that it was a random Jedi that I had met. This pride for Phoenix may have been against the code, but it wasn't pride for myself, it was pride for Phoenix or was it Akume? I really needed to look up this woman, perhaps on the nets if I could find her. Anyway, I felt awestruck seeing the woman who had saved my life all those many years ago. If I could…if I could only tell her.

"The…the Jedi who encouraged me to join the Order, the one who was with the group going to fight the Mandalorians, she was human. I... I suppose I see something of her in you when I look... I am sorry… I am getting away from my point. If there even was one… Sometimes I curse the day my parents fled to Taris. But then again, if they had not, I would not be where I am today."

"Your parents fled? Why?"

I sighed. "Yes….my parents fled our homeworld. my parents flew as far and wide as they could. And so I was raised alone, knowing of my birthplace only the few stories my parents could tell and seeing no other member of my species at all. They fled because of the Mandalorians. My people had a great reputation as warriors… and that appealed to the Mandalorian version of 'honor'. They sought to test themselves against us, I think… test themselves by bombing our world, slaughtering my people while they slept or while they ran."

"And you ended up on Taris when you fled?"

"Yes, and it was a horrible place to settle. But my parents were tired of running and could run no further. I was but a babe when my parents fled. So Taris was the only home I knew. However, despite everything I do have good memories, a few non-human friends I met in the lower city. It is why I say that Taris was a horrible place but I have fond memories of it regardless."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"You would think the Republic would have done something for Cathar. Cathar fought against the Mandalorians before...they fought against Exar Kun...they fought on the side of the Republic. How could the Republic not have done something? Anything?"

 _Do you understand now why I left the Order, Phoenix? And why I have such hate for the Jedi and contempt for the Republic. They let Cathar, they let many worlds that even though they weren't members of the Republic suffer. A lot of those worlds helped the Republic against Exar Kun. However, some did not...some aided him but...a Jedi is supposed to not let those things color them. The Jedi should have helped regardless, despite past alignment. What the Jedi did was criminal! And what the Republic did…was even worse. They had the military might but refused to act on it._

I sighed internally. Revan, I will not deny you have a valid point, but you cannot let hate devour you. I agree it was criminal. I saw my own planet suffer from the Mandalorians too but I let such atrocities direct me towards helping others. You were that way...once, weren't you, Revan? You saw injustice, and you righted it. What happened to you? You became the very thing you hated. Or did the war change you so much?

There was no answer, and I knew, Revan had no response.

Juhani spoke, "We were prepared! Just not for an invasion of that size… And we had counted on the aid of our allies, even aid from the Republic. However, we were not members of the Republic. Cathar was beyond the edge of the Republic, in the Outer Rim. And besides, they could not have known. Our interstellar communications were the first things the Mandalorians hit. All other short-range communicators were jammed…we were on our own. We knew what was coming. We had fought the Mandalorians in the first war against Exar Kun and the Sith. We knew there would be no mercy for us. The most we could do was pack the few of our people who survived onto what few ships remained and send them off into space as fast as they could. Most did not make it."

"I wanted to know why you saved those wookiees and we've gotten completely off on things. We've talked about you fleeing your home, about the Mandalorian wars and the Jedi who encouraged you to join the Order."

Juhani chuckled lightly. "Patience Padawan, it is all interconnected, this story I tell. Anyway, my parents did not take very well to what happened on Taris or on Cathar. My father… my father turned to stimulants. He spent much of his time in local bars and dives. But we are warriors. It runs through our blood. And when he was on stims he… he… he became foolish… he let his warrior nature get the best of him. So he would get intoxicated, and he would fight, and finally one day he would die."

I ended up hugging Juhani once more and she began to cry. "How…how did it happen?"

"I saw it...my mother told me to go after my father and… he was killed by a man who provoked him into a fight and killed him like an animal. My mother was devastated…she was never the same after that. Her energy was spent trying to feed me and take care of me. She couldn't afford to do so, not without borrowing money from the Exchange. In the end, she became very, very sick. There was nothing I could do, Phoenix. She lay moaning and crying in pain. I had no money for a doctor. There was one man, who managed to give me sedatives so she would sleep. In the end, she died in her sleep and I was left alone with a debt to the Exchange that could not be paid back."

I was quiet as Juhani cried and filled my smuggler's clothing with tears. "You've had a hard life Juhani."

She sighed. "It was this woman, this Jedi that saved me, Phoenix. The Exchange...they took me by force as a slave. You have no idea what it is like to be bound like a beast and treated as such. It was the worst time of my life. They treated me like livestock. They were waiting for a buyer to give them some credits for me when the Jedi came to fight the Mandalorians."

"So that is why you…wanted to save the wookiees."

"Yes, Phoenix...this woman...she came. Saw me being bound up as a slave and she freed me. I honored her by deciding to become a Jedi and she told me to seek out the Order. I honored her by freeing the wookiees that were on Tatooine. Now do you understand, Phoenix that the story I tell is all linked?"

I nodded, and said, "And you honor this woman being on this mission?"

Juhani nodded. "Yes, thank you, Phoenix, for allowing me to be part of this mission. I know you didn't have much to say in my coming with you. But...as I said you remind me a lot of the woman that saved me on Taris. Her goodness, her standing up for those in need."

I blushed slightly. "Juhani…I am not...well I try."

Juhani dried the tears from her eyes and let go of my hug and she said softly. "I suppose trying to strive towards the Light is better than the alternative."

I nodded. "It is…but never for a moment think I am beyond the call of the Dark Side, Juhani. I fight it…more than you realize."

"That is good to hear...I mean…not that I think it is good to hear you struggle and fight...it's just that you make following the Light Side look so easy."

I laughed. "if I make it look easy then you don't really know me as well as you think."

Juhani's ears flattened. "That is probably true. I know so little of you, Phoenix Star. I just know you saved me in the grove on Dantooine and your heart overall is a good one."

"My heart is my own, Juhani. But I suppose you wish to know some of my past."

Juhani nodded. "I...yes...I would be honored to hear of your past, Phoenix."

I nodded. "I was born on Deralia, the child of two farmers and merchants. We had a vineyard and...it all was destroyed by the Mandalorians when the Mandalorians invaded the rim. My parents and my brother were killed, and I was left an orphan at fifteen years of age."

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

What could I say to, Phoenix? I knew the memories she spoke of weren't real or if they were, they were the memories of someone else. She was Akume. I had a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach, what…what did the Jedi do to her? My eyes filled with tears.

"I...your past sounds just as painful…"

Phoenix probably thought I was crying over her past and I wanted to tell her the truth...but...no, the council made me vow not to tell her.

Phoenix's voice cracked. "Juhani, please don't cry. My past...the Jedi are my family now. You're my family."

Akume was our family, she had been redeemed and brought into the fold of the Jedi. "Yes, Phoenix. I will be your family."

I looked at Phoenix; she was a beautiful, confident woman despite all that she had gone through in her past. She had come home to the Jedi. I embraced her as she had done with me. Part of me wished to kiss her, and I bent closer to lay a kiss on her cheek, although truthfully I wished it was upon her lips. She quickly backed away. "Juhani…I am sorry...I don't...I don't feel the same way about you and…"

I nodded and said,"Forgive me. I am sorry. I…I just well I find you an amazing woman and perhaps once again I got carried away."

Phoenix blushed a bit and then said, "Yea...well..." She said softly, "I am promised to Carth Onasi, Juhani. We will probably be married at the end of all of this."

My eyes went wide with joy. "Oh Phoenix...really!"

She nodded.

"What about your future with the Order?"

She shrugged. "Between the Order and Carth...well that's not exactly a difficult decision, Juhani." She smiled. "I told you my heart is my own and it does not belong to the Jedi Order. I don't believe my heart belongs to anyone…except… the Force and to Carth."

I nodded. "Then you will be Carth's mate, and you will have another family claim you."

Phoenix then said, "Please don't say anything to anyone else. I didn't want to tell you...but...well...I didn't want you to pin your heart on me, Juhani."

"I swear on my honor as a Jedi not to tell a soul."

"Thank you, Juhani."

* * *

 **~Carth Onasi~**

I entered into the computer and ship's systems room; it was here that I found Jordo and I smiled lightly at him. "How are you holding up, Jordo?"

He sighed. "I miss my family to be truthful. I probably need to go back to Telos but I promised Lydia that I'd come home from Czerka with my pockets full of credits so we could move to where ever she wishes. She's going to be mad as hell that I quit."

I chuckled. "We do end up with some strong-willed women, don't we, Jordo?"

"Morgana was pretty fiery and come to think of it, and I've seen you with Phoenix and she doesn't seem too passive either. She seems quite proactive when push comes to shove. She'll keep you on your toes, Carth."

I laughed. "Phoenix is a bit of a spitfire, I agree. I think I love her for it, though."

"You're going to marry her, aren't you?"

I nodded a bit of a cheesy grin on my face and Jordo laughed and said, "Well I was best man at you and Morgana's wedding, at least let me be your best man for your marriage to Phoenix."

I smiled. "Always Jordo. Oh and about Manaan…"

Jordo sighed. "We're not going there right off, are we?"

"Nope, this ship is a Jedi ship, Jordo. And we'll end up on Manaan eventually but we're just along for the ride. I want to go to Korriban, and I know you want to go to Manaan. I know Phoenix wants us to go to Manaan next because she says I have a debt to fulfill to you because you let me know about Dustil."

Jordo sighed. "She's got a sense of honor about her, doesn't she? Look, Carth. I know your boy means a lot to you. I can forgo Manaan a little longer."

I shook my head. "We could just pass by and drop you off on Manaan and then head on to Korriban."

Jordo nodded. "That's true…we could do that. Oh, and I tried to contact Lydia but...I am not sure you know but your long range comm system seems to be off. I wanted to ask you about that."

I frowned. "Sithspit. I was supposed to get communiques from Admiral Dodonna and…no wonder I haven't heard from her. If she doesn't hear from me soon, she's probably going to send the fleet after me."

I heard a beep coming from the ship's systems. "Damn...we're coming out of hyperspace."

I ran into the cockpit and looked at the control panels. My comm rang and I heard Bastila over the comm. "Carth, can you help me? Phoenix...she...I don't know what happened, but she passed out."

"What? How? Hold on, Bastila. I've got to land us on Kashyyyk."

* * *

A/N: Don't you just love cliffhangers? I am so glad people liked Liam. Oh, by the way, I started a story with him in the fashion of KOTOR II. It's called Your Walk is Heavy: A Jedi Exile's Story. No Idea, when I'll update it though. I want to get my endgame storyline up before I manage doing it. I slightly edited my last chapter and included an interruption from Minden to Liam because Liam does get a tad long-winded. lol. Thanks again Kosiah and Ether for your reviews. Also, thank you, Vienna Logan, for your review and yea I like inserting KOTOR II into this story because I want the two games to blend together.


	62. Ch 61: Kashyyyk: A Conspiracy of Ravens

**Chapter 61: Kashyyyk: A Conspiracy of Ravens**

 **~Matton Dasol~**

Eli had been getting really odd lately, course it was odd that my crew had taken off and left me in debt with a snake-like Eli. I had a feeling somehow Eli had something to do with my crew taking off on me. I began to snoop around Eli's belongings and found a datapad of his that stated: A c _ustomer is coming. Be ready to initiate negotiations. Do not trust other business contacts._

Eli caught me looking at his datapad and swiped it away from his counter and pushed it deep into his own pockets. "Matton, this is personal business. You have no right to look at my business info. I shrugged. "Sorry Eli, but if you have a customer coming I want to make sure you have the right inventory out for them."

Eli shook his head, "Matton, my business affairs are my own concern, not yours."

"Whatever you say, but if I have to pay off this debt I owe to you, then you should let me help you out more."

Eli said nothing to me and went coldly back to his inventory. The guy was acting really shifty, more so than usual. After finishing some minor repairs on Eli's ship, I was allowed to take a break. I spent some time playing Pazaak, Republic Senate-style with Fodo. The rodian was not a very good player and it was a shame I didn't have a credit to my name otherwise I could have probably paid off the debt I owed Eli. I spoke with Fodo. "So...have you noticed that Eli's been acting a bit strange, more so than usual?"

The rodian nodded and stated in Rodese, "Indeed, but you humans are often a strange lot. However, I've noticed Eli has been restless lately. Something weighs heavily on his mind."

I heard the roar of engines, and looked up to see a ship landing on Kashyyk. I remembered Eli's datapad. _A customer is coming._

It looked like Eli's information was correct, the ship that landed looked like a smuggler's ship. If there was business to be initiated with whoever was in it I better look lively and get back to Eli.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

 _I heard the sound of strange creatures making noise in a huge vast dark forest. I saw the Star Map suddenly open revealing the contents of a map…._

"Phoenix...wake up….Phoenix…"

My eyes shifted open to find myself laying in the medical bay on a bed. Bastila's brows were furrowed in sheer worry.

"You saw it?" She said. Her eyes looked eagerly at me. Frack, why was I the one who was so blessed to have Revan crawling around in my body? Her possession of my body was getting worse. I worried that Revan was going to take over my body and I would be relegated to being the one who nagged at her rather than her nagging at me.

Carth was beside me. "Hey, beautiful…are...are you alright?"

"I..." I paused a moment and sighed. "I had another vision of the Star Forge. It's in the depths of Kashyyyk. I think."

Bastila nodded. "We are being guided by the Force, Carth…"

Carth snorted. "Guided my foot, this whole thing has got to end. Phoenix needs to stop having these dreams or visions. We're already on Kashyyyk. What happens when we reach Korriban or Manaan and she passes out there as well. That's dangerous, Bastila. I don't care if it's the Force or not. There has to be a way to end these visions."

Bastila shook her head. "There isn't...you might as well try and cut Phoenix off from the Force and that's a cruel thing for any Force user. Do you know the story of Ulic Qel-Droma or Liam Mandrell? They lost the Force."

I thought to myself maybe cutting myself off from the Force would drive Revan from me. I nodded. "I'd be willing to lose the Force, Bastila if….it ends this nightmare."

Bastila shook her head. "It won't. Malak wants us dead, Phoenix. Cutting yourself off from the Force will find you ill-prepared against him. You need the Force, like it or not. Plus those that are cut off from the Force live a life worse than death itself. I do not recommend it to anyone."

"It was worth pondering."

Carth nodded, agreeing with me. "Isn't there a way to block, Phoenix from the visions and not cut her off from the Force?"

"No...there isn't…" Bastila said firmly and then added, "We need those visions to help us find the Star Maps."

I folded up my arms and said firmly, "I…I don't believe you, Bastila. These dreams. I've been having them since we've met. Why? I've never had such visions before. I think you're infl..."

Bastila cut me off from my sentence, that she is the one that is the power behind me having these dreams. How though, I am not sure. Is she using her meditation on me? Is it the bond we have? It makes no sense. I wasn't even having dreams like this before I knew of Bastila…it all started on Taris. If I could go back to Taris to try and figure it out I would.

"It is your destiny to have these dreams, Phoenix. As a Jedi, you cannot fight against your destiny. Even as a Padawan you should know that."

Carth glared at Bastila and I could tell he was worried for me and I sighed. "Destiny or not...we're here and...I am a Jedi. I can't ignore what the council has dictated. Malak has to be stopped, we all agree on that. I looked at Bastila. Your mission, Bastila...since you're in charge."

Bastila looks at me a sheepish look on her face. "Phoenix...I need your help."

I rolled my eyes. "You need what? I didn't hear you."

"Surely you're joking. I said I needed your help…well actually I need Zaalbar's help as well and the wookiees in the cargo hold. Your life debt to Zaalbar will aid us in our task to getting down to the depths of the Kashyyyk forests."

I shook my head. "Sure you need me now. Honestly, Bastila, you are in charge and yet...I don't...what the frack do you want from me? You insult me...you claim I am not capable of being in charge. Be honest with me, Bastila. Do you need me or not?"

Bastila sighed and her eyes went to the floor and she said softly. "Phoenix...I am sorry…"

"What...was that you said? I can't hear you?"

"Look, this mission's success relies on you, Phoenix. Even the Order admits that I…I got carried away with my authority."

"You're a sorry leader, Bastila. How you managed to succeed against Rev…oh you didn't. Malak did."

Bastila cringed, typical, mention Revan and she falls apart.

"We don't have time for this, Phoenix, suffice it to say, I need your help. Now let's go...that Star Map needs to be found."

"Alright, but I decide the course of action here since as you so obviously admitted this mission's success relies on me and the Order knows that. I would have preferred we were co-leaders, Bastila. It's what I thought we were when we started this mission. So...are we both together on this or not?"

Bastila looked at me and she suddenly grasped my hand and forearm in a strong grip and said. "We serve the Jedi, Phoenix. I...let my worry cloud my judgment about you and Korriban."

I nodded. "You're worried about a Sith planet. I know...I share the same worries. But we will get to that planet...eventually."

Frack, I didn't want to go to Korriban. I was scared of the damn place. Why Bastila was worried about me and that planet was irrational. If there was a way, we could get all the Star Maps without dropping in on Korriban that would be great. In fact, my suggestion of a debt to fulfill to Jordo was an excuse to Carth. I knew his son needed to be saved from the Sith, but I was dragging my feet. I didn't want to go. I was perfectly content to let Korriban molder with it's dead Sith Lords.

I heard a laugh within my head.

 _Phoenix is scared of dead Sith._ _Does that mean you're scared of me as well?_

With good reason, Revan. Those dead Sith are not as dead as they claim they are. You're proof enough of that. Frack, Freedon Nadd was dead…he managed to corrupt Exar Kun.

 _Kun was already corrupt. He wanted to be a Sith Lord even as a Jedi. Nadd only unlocked the darkness that he already possessed. Are you afraid you'll be corrupted by me? Maybe you already are, Phoenix._

If I am...then I accept that. Plus how do you know so much regarding Exar Kun?

I _am from Onderon, Phoenix. Freedon Nadd, Exar Kun, and their legends are part of my heritage. The Jedi never wanted to admit that regarding me...but Queen Amanoa and Ommin is part of my history. Perhaps that's why the Jedi never fully liked me. I had too much of that heritage within me. The Jedi tried so hard to obliterate the Darkness from Onderon. They took as many Force-sensitive children, both noble and common blood alike, that they could from Onderon for many years. I was one of those children, better we would be raised as Jedi then as followers of Freedon Nadd._

You know about that but not where the Star Forge is? Seriously…Revan either your memory is like rocks or you're still lying to me.

 _My memory is rocks. There I said it. Happy. I doubt it...you still think I am lying._

Well, it does beg the question.

Revan sighed. _My memory is like a rancor's chew toy. Somethings are so vivid, and others filled with holes. Perhaps finding the Star Maps will help my memory._

You keep saying that. What if we find all the maps and your memory is still…

 _I have thought of that, there is the possibility…_

The possibility of what?

 _Don't you find it odd that a brain-damaged person like you and my lack of memory is an odd coincidence?_

I wasn't brain damaged.

Revan sighed. _You were…remember what that twerp rodian said about you back on Tatooine and you have no memory of it. Somehow your memory or mind was damaged. He said you were left for dead by Calo Nord. Isn't that an odd coincidence? Think about it Phoenix, We are an unlikely convergence, by all considerations we both should be dead. But we're not._

Revan did have a point but it was enough to make my head throb.

"Phoenix are you alright?"

"I...my headaches."

Bastila nodded. "It's probably that vision you had of Kashyyyk."

I nodded. Carth looked at me and concerned filtered through his eyes. "See, Bastila that's another reason Phoenix should not have these visions. They are bad for her health."

"She's alright, aren't you, Phoenix?"

I nodded and then said, "I am fine, Carth. Bastila…was Revan from Onderon and related to the beast lord and King of Onderon Oron Kira?"

She looked at me strangely. "Who...who told you that?"

Maybe...Bastila didn't know all the visions I had since she wondered how I knew of this. "The visions...I need to know if it's true."

Carth frowned at me. "Wait a minute; you're having other visions of Revan's past! Phoenix…what the hell is going on?"

Bastila looked uncertain as she stared at me. She looked at me with a careful glance. "It's true...Phoenix. Please, enough on this we need to get moving. Talk to the wookiees, Phoenix; you understand their language quite well. We may need their help to get to the bottom of the Kashyyyk forests."

I sighed and looked at Carth. "I don't know. If I did know…I'd tell you. The mission...the visions are important to the mission. We must stop Malak...I must find the Star Forge."

I went off to the cargo hold leaving Bastila and Carth.

* * *

 **~Carth Onasi~**

I glared at Bastila. "Bastila…what the hell is going on? I vaguely remember that Phoenix was having some other visions regarding Revan...well I thought it was only related to the Star Forge itself."

"It is...all the visions we are having are related to the Star Forge."

"Yes...but Revan's homeworld and his heritage. Why is that important to the mission? I feel like...I don't even know if Phoenix knows what's going on, but I think you do, Bastila. And I love Phoenix, I deserve the right to know what's going on with her."

Bastila sighed. "You don't want to know, Carth. Please…leave it alone. "

I frowned. "What? Why?"

Bastila looked firmly at me, her fingers seemed to twitch nervously. She muttered some words. I felt dizzy what was this all about again?

"I...better go see Phoenix."

Bastila nodded and her voice took on a tone of sadness. "Yes, Carth. Go see to Phoenix; she needs you."

I wondered what Bastila was sad about but then again, perhaps her sadness was that Phoenix was not following the tenets of the Jedi Order.

I wandered off towards the cargo bay and found Phoenix talking to a group of wookiees. Zaalbar was with her and she grasped Zaalbar's hand and placed it in the hand of another wookiee that looked a bit like Zaalbar.

I heard Phoenix speak,"I promise Freyyr and Zaalbar I will place the blade of Bacca in your hands. However, I need your help. I doubt Czerka is going to let us enter the forests…"

I struggled to understand the rest of the conversation because my conversational wookiee was not up to snuff. How Phoenix managed to understand the roars and grunts of several wookiees was beyond me.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"They are called the Shadowlands…" Zaalbar interjected.

I nodded. "Anyway...I doubt Czerka will let us even enter. I am sure they know about...Juhani freeing you from slavery. Plus…dealing with Chuundar."

Zaalbar stated, "Yes, Chunndar will never let you into the Shadowlands if your motive is to go for the blade of Bacca."

 _There is another way...Phoenix. I remember…there are several ways into the Shadowlands. I took one of these ways, and you must use it. I will show you the way._

Uhh, why the change of heart, Revan?

 _Perhaps you are right, Phoenix. Perhaps I have lost sight of who I was._

Right…and I am supposed to believe you? You refused to help me with the sarlacc why help me now?

 _Why do you question what I do?_

Umm, you're a fracking Sith Lord. You're not exactly known for helping others.

Revan sighed. _Do you want me *not* to help you?_

Okay fine…you made your point. Just don't fracking take over my body and possess me, Revan. I have had enough of that.

"Freyyr...is there an alternate route to the Shadowlands, one other than the one you use or even one that Czerka uses?

Freyyr answered, "Yes...it was built by an outsider. They came to hunt the great beast that dwells in the Shadowlands. The one you must kill to obtain the blade of Bacca. The way down is not as easy or as nice as the one that Chuundar and Czerka use. It is also used by the Hairless One and the Faceless One. It was also used by the Masked One."

"Hairless and Faceless…Umm…you have odd names, Freyyr. The Masked One is probably…well, Revan probably came this way…unless…you have an infestation of Mandalorians. They wear masks, well helmets technically."

Freyyr tried to pronounce the word Mandalorian, but he then said. "We were aware of those masked and helmeted ones. Czerka Outsider filth hired them to collect us as slaves but...fired them…because too many of us were killed by them. They refused to leave and when they started killing Czerka Outsiders, they left them in our Shadowlands."

Freyyr growled suddenly in anger and I sighed. "I suppose you want my help to clear them out as well."

"You do not have to, Phoenix Star. But your help would aid and help my people."

I smiled softly. "I will help, but I have something I need to find in the Shadowlands, Freyyr. I need to find a Star Map."

Freyyr responded, "I know not of a Star Map...but there is strange Outsider machinery in the Shadowlands. I once saw it as a young wook."

I looked thoughtful, machinery, my vision and the wookiees concept of machinery. The Star Map would look like odd machinery to wookiees.

"Alright...so…"I looked contemplative. I am already dressed as a smuggler. I don't know how much my luck or the Force will hold sway with me but we will go into Kashyyyk, and I will tell any Czerka members that I want to hunt wookiee pelts. Don't tell Zaalbar or Freyyr; they'll get upset. But I have to have a cover story to tell any Czerka filth that is here.

"I have a plan to get into the Shadowlands. Zaalbar...you and your father, as well as the rest of your group, are going to have to stay on the Hawk. Sorry, you will wait for me to get back with the blade of Bacca and then we will work on getting you reestablished."

I turned from the cargo bay and saw Carth waiting outside of the cargo bay. We proceeded to walk to the cockpit. Carth looked a bit out of it. "Hey, Republic...you look..."I frowned. There was an aura of Force use around him. Someone had used the Force on him, of course…I had used it earlier when I had caused him to sleep. I grinned a bit sheepishly. "Sorry…Carth."

He smiled at me. "So…what are your plans?"

"Well…Republic. I need you, HK, and Canderous to accompany me into the Shadowlands. There is a hidden way down into it. We can't take Juhani with us, because of her actions on Tatooine and...I don't trust...well Bastila…"

"You don't trust her and neither do I, Phoenix."

"Well…maybe I should bring her..."

"What? why?"

I smiled softly. "Old saying, keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

Carth nodded. "What if she..."

"What if she what, Carth? I think it's best to keep tabs on her. I am bonded to her, and my feelings tell me she's hiding shit from me. I don't like it."

"Speaking of hiding things, did you turn off the long-range comm system."

I frowned. "Of course not...I didn't even know it was turned off."

"Well, it was. I don't know when I'll get around to fixing it.

I smiled. "I'll get T3 to fix it. You go and get HK and Canderous and meet me on the landing platform. Oh and ditch the flight suit, Republic and wear some of the armor we've gotten off of some of our previous combats. With HK, you and Canderous should give the right impression for this."

"What impression is that, my devious little Raven?"

I grinned. "That we are a load of mercs hunting for wookiee pelts."

Carth's mouth dropped. "Err...this is just as bad if not worse then us going into the Black Vulkars lair."

"Look we need a reason to get to the Shadowlands and if anyone asks us our business then it's a good cover story."

"What about Bastila?"

"I know...she screams Jedi. Frack...there has got to be a way to gussy her up like a merc."

Carth laughed. "Good luck." He wandered off to go fetch Canderous and HK.

I pushed buttons on my comm and summoned T3.

:: You sent for me, Phoenix.::

"Yea, the long-range comm system is off or broken. I need you to fix it."

There was a long pause and then the beeping answer. ::I cannot.::

I raised an eyebrow, something strange was going on here. "What do you mean, you cannot?"

:: My programming dictates that I cannot repair something that I was commanded to turn off. Do not order me to do what I was previously commanded to do, Phoenix::

"Why not?"

:: My programming will break.::

I cringed, give a droid commands or words that conflicted with its programming and it would go berserk or who knows what.

"Well, I did not command you to turn off the long-range comm system, T3. So who did?"

The droid was quiet and didn't beep or respond. "Let me guess...you can't tell me or your programming will break."

:: I am sorry, Phoenix. I have let you down.::

I patted the droid on its dome. "Ehh...I suppose it's up to me to figure out who turned off the comm system."

:: You will not like the answers, Phoenix. Best to let it be.::

"Well, I am sorry, T3. I can't let it be."

I looked thoughtful and then turned on my comm. "HK, I need you can you come to the cockpit please."

The assassin droid responded, Statement: I am coming, Master.

I did not like what I was going to do, but I knew if I was going to get the answers I needed, then HK would be the one to help me uncover them.

As the droid arrived, I stated, "HK...T3 is hiding information from me. If he doesn't give it to me, you have my permission to violently deactivate him."

Statement: Oh Master, your statement sends tingles through my behavior core.

I chuckled. "I bet...okay T3, tell me who told you to the turn off the long-range comm system. If you don't answer...I'll have HK broil your circuits."

:: Please Phoenix…don't do this.::

"Look, T3. Tell me who commanded you to switch off the comm system."

:: I…:: there was a long pause between beeps and then a forlorn beep.:: Bastila.::

I smiled. "There's a good little astromech."

"Okay, HK go join Carth and Canderous."

HK looked at me and said in a rather annoyed tone. Statement: Pity, I was looking forward in frying the trash compactor.

I sighed and looked at T3. He beeped at me ::Are you still going to hurt me, Phoenix?::

I shook my head. "No. Why do you think that, T3?"

:: Bastila said...you might.::

"I see. Well, she's wrong and she's been wrong about a lot of things regarding me lately. And you were wrong, T3. You telling me this didn't break your programming. Course, I had a feeling that putting you under threat like that would keep that from happening."

:: You took an incredible risk, Phoenix.::

"Yea I did. But I am a known risk taker." I said that last portion with a grin on my face. "Besides you're a tough little remote. I didn't think you'd crack as quickly as you did."

:: You are my owner, Phoenix. But I was afraid of what Bastila told me.::

"I see...well don't hide secrets from me again."

:: I will try not to…Phoenix.::

The droid took off before I could say anything else. I felt bad about scaring the astromech. I had a partiality towards machines. I frowned, I didn't own any as a girl growing up. My mother thought they were a frivolity. I guess I was making up for lost time having T3 and HK. I paused a moment. I seemed to understand T3 very well…how was that? I didn't exactly grow up knowing how to understand Astromech data beeps.

I took a deep breath, I was not looking forward confronting Bastila, but this was getting to be a continual thing with her. I always confronted her, and she always seemed to placate me with non-satisfactory answers, answers that seemed steeped in half-truths and non-answers. I had a feeling I would get the same from her.

 _Let it go, Phoenix._

Revan, you're the last person I would expect to give me that advice. Why?

 _You know Bastila will only lie to you or give you perfunctory answers that will not satisfy you. It's a waste of time. I know her answer, and you know it too. You don't even have to ask her. She will say she's doing it to protect the Hawk from Malak. You know that's not fully true, and it's not fully a lie. So why bother messing with her, to begin with!_

I had to agree with Revan and then I frowned. Wait a minute...if you know Bastila's answer...does that mean you are bonded to her as well?

 _I am attached to you, Phoenix and you're attached to Bastila…so figure it out!_

Realization suddenly dawned on me. I am not bonded to Bastila at all…it's Revan. It's a three-fold bond. If I could get rid of Revan then, the bond between me and Bastila wouldn't exist at all and I would be free. Bastila ended up connected to Revan who 's connection ended up keeping Revan's spirit tied to the physical realm and then Revan's spirit tied itself to me. This actually made a lot of sense. I wasn't exactly sure how this happened, somewhere on Tatooine...I was sure of it plus the location of the Star Map and Revan's krayt dragon cave holocron. I may have ended up touching it with the Force or something and I was linked to Revan that way. However, I had no memory of that. I sighed. My memory must have been really fracked up when Calo Nord attacked me the first time.

I didn't like letting go of Bastila, but Revan was right, it was a waste of time. However, I would keep my focus on her and keep her close to me as I had said to Carth.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I didn't like it, using the Force once again on Carth. Yet, I knew Carth if he knew the truth of Phoenix's past he'd likely turn on both of us. His anger against his mentor Saul Karath was well known in the Republic fleet.

There was a feeling of animosity flowing from Phoenix. I could feel it. Did she truly hate me? I sighed. I had betrayed her trust too many times. She came to me, a look of utter disgust on her face.

"I need you to change clothes, Bastila. I can't have you look like a Jedi. Not if we are to get the Star Map and help the wookiees here."

"You are upset, Phoenix. Tell me why?"

She took a deep heavy breath. "It is a waste of time to even bother asking you. You'll only give me a placating answer."

"You seem so certain of that."

"I do because it is the truth. I would rather truth flow between us, but you seem incapable of it. We shared...so much and..."

"How much have you told Carth, Phoenix? Have you told him you are possessed by Revan? Have you told him about us in the shower, about us on Tatooine? Maybe when you can tell him all that then I will tell you the truth."

Phoenix's eyes flashed with anger. "You would blackmail me…now. I…" She paused and then said angrily. "I hate you, Bastila Shan. We will work together, we will find the Star Maps but...I will never call you a friend or a lover again. Now I find you have disconnected the long-range comm and you even twisted T3 to your own machinations."

"About that...it is to keep Mal…."

"Shove it...that's the convenient answer. Whatever you did to T3, had that astromech scared to death. Now…get dressed like a merc or don't come with me at all."

I watched as Phoenix stormed off and I watched her angry stance. It was the same stance that I remembered seeing on Raven's Pride, Revan's flagship when I confronted Revan. This wasn't Phoenix; it was Revan. A cold chill went down my spine.

Did I dare follow her? And how could I simply obey her? Yet, the command came so easily from her lips. She's acting like the general she was during the Mandalorian wars and I bet she doesn't even realize it. Yet the command brokered no argument; if I didn't do what she said I would be left behind and I couldn't afford to be left behind. I needed to keep an eye on her and make sure we retrieved the Star Map.

I quietly went through the storage compartments in the bunk room and found clothing that apparently Davik would have worn. It seemed a bit mannish in taste but it would suffice and probably placate Phoe...Revan's demands.

I mentally cringed as I changed. I still couldn't believe I was complying with her demands. Yet part of me wanted to obey her commands. It felt strangely natural and fighting against it not normal. She was a natural leader, that was true and then there was our bond. I was pretty sure I was being compelled by our bond. It felt strange not wearing the robes of the Order.

I tied my double lightsaber to the belt and went outside of the Hawk.

* * *

 **~Canderous ~**

What a motley group we were, two Jedi dressed like mercenary smugglers, an armor-clad Republic soldier and a deranged assassin droid. Phoenix even kept a blaster on her belt. I hoped she hadn't gotten rusty after her fight with Bendak.

An ithorian came forward toward the landing pad and I was kind of shocked seeing the ithorian. Didn't they pride themselves being a peaceful race? I guess times were hard and apparently this piece of shit had sold his conscious out in the whole merchandising of wookiee slaves. He spoke in that low rumbling ithorian language that I found grated on my nerves.

"Greetings to you, my name is Janos Wertka. Welcome to planet G5-623."

"G5-623?" Phoenix stated. "I thought this planet was called Kashyyyk."

"That is the name the primitives give it," The Ithorian stated. "Technically the name is Edean. It was the name that was agreed by corporate stockholders of Czerka Corporation."

"I see…colonialism at it's finest," Phoenix replied.

The ithorian ignored her statement and stated. "Your ship is not on our list of arrivals. We request a 100 credit payment for your use of our platform."

Phoenix's hand came out and she quietly and subtlety passed it in what I recognized as Jedi persuasion. "I don't think I need to pay the docking fee. Stand Aside!"

The ithorian nodded and said quite willingly. "Perhaps you don't need to pay the docking fee. Any services you need will more than make up for it."

I chuckled and said softly to Phoenix, "I'm amazed at how many people that works on. The entire galaxy must be filled with weak-minded fools."

Meanwhile, the Jedi Princess looked in horror at Phoenix's Force use and said in a whisper,"I must protest...the Force should not be used for profit and personal gain. As Jedi, we should be above such things."

Phoenix rolled her eyes and said quietly, "Shove it…Bastila. You're not my conscious."

Man, what a complete three hundred and sixty degrees between those two. Something must have had happened between them. Phoenix seemed to have a good deal of animosity between the Jedi brat. I grinned and looked at Bastila; she ignored me.

I looked at Carth, and he put an arm around Phoenix and she smiled. I got it...Bastila and Phoenix were on the outs. Love was indeed a fickle thing.

The ithorian then stated. "What is your business on Edean?"

"We are here to hunt wookiee pelts. Where would we go to hunt them?"

"Ahh..." The ithorian said. "Game hunters. I see...well I would have to see if we can arrange a hunt for you."

"That won't be necessary…" Phoenix said. "I've hunted on Tatooine and killed a krayt dragon." She pulled from her purse the dragon pearl and then grinned. "I can manage a few wild wookiees. "

The ithorian nodded. "As you wish...but do check in with us, we require payment for every wookiee pelt you take."

"Very well."

We were free to go and the ithorian walked back to his office. Bastila started in. "How repugnant…wookiee pelts...it's a good thing Zaalbar isn't here, He'd pitch a fit."

Phoenix tore into her. "Damn it Bastila, it's a cover. Czerka is probably aware of our actions on Tatooine. This story is the best way for us to get access to the planet. I am unsure if you're dense or just ignorant."

I laughed, and Carth nodded. "Have some trust in Phoenix, Bastila. Her methods are a bit unorthodox, I agree but they get results."

HK then added. Statement: I am disappointed, I would have liked to have at least one wookiee pelt.

Phoenix suddenly laughed. "No wookiee pelts. Period. Sorry HK. Maybe we can get some Sith pelts instead or Mandalorian pelts."

I raised an eyebrow and Phoenix chuckled. "I am kidding of course. But there are some Mandalorians hunting wookiees. I intend to put a stop to that."

I snorted. "My people disgust me. They should be organizing themselves and regrouping themselves into the clans, instead, they are here on backwater worlds taking ineffective actions."

We continued our walk down the platform and a merchant came in front of us. "Ahh, spacers have come to wild Kashyyyk. Please, look well upon the wares of Eli Gand. I live to serve your needs."

Phoenix rolled her eyes and was about to speak when a man next to the merchant spoke. "Just be sure to pay in cash. The interest on his loans will drain you like a Deluvian fatworm on a Hutt's backside."

Eli responded, "First off, Hutts are ALL backside. Secondly, I don't much like the comparison, Matton. No need to get personal. It's just business. Poor fellow, he's been waiting for his friends to return with my money for a standard month now. Ah, but you don't need to hear of this. What can I get you?"

"I am not really interested in any of your wares."

The merchant suddenly grasped Phoenix's hand. "Ahh but I insist. Have a look."

She sighed. "Fine."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The man pulled me into his merchant's tent and I looked around medpacks, armor, stims. This man had quite a selection. He smiled at me. "Now down to business." He pulled out a datapad. "Ms...Phoenix Star, is it?"

I frowned. How did this man know me?

"Ahh, you don't remember me. That is a shame. I have to warn you, though. Someone has some nasty business with you."

"Huh?"

He sighed and typed into his datapad. "Hmm...your hair is a different color and your eyes as well. Although..."

I stared at the man. He might as well have been speaking gibberish. "My hair has always been black and my eyes as well."

He shook his head. "So you think. I might as well be speaking to a gamorrean. Where's that Jedi you're with? Perhaps she will understand more than you. Anyway…"

He handed me his datapad. "Maybe this will help you later on. Oh and here…this will help you." He pressed a bunch of medpacks into my hands and pushed me out.

I looked at the datapad to find it was locked and encrypted. I pushed a few random buttons, but all I got was: _Access Denied_. I scratched my head. What good was it giving me a datapad I couldn't even access?

"Ms. Bastila Shan...a moment of your time."

Bastila frowned and walked into the tent.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

There was something unusual about this man. I could sense nothing about him. His whole presence was a blank to me, I could not read him at all.

"Who are you?"

"A friend...or an enemy. Your choice. I can see I am wasting my time with your companion. She is apparently confused about a great many things. But I know who she is…"

My jaw dropped. The man laughed. "I have my sources. Plus trying to pass off a black haired, dark eyed woman whose personal identification seems to have been altered. Anyway, the original id I have of Phoenix Star has her as a red-haired, green-eyed woman. You might as well have called her Nomi. You Jedi have gotten sloppy. Very sloppy. Oh and don't worry about her hearing anything. This tent has been installed with security upgrades. We are as alone as we can be in this tent."

"Who are you? You did not answer my question. But you're obviously not Eli."

"Oh, so you just figured that out. No…Eli is dead. I caught him killing Matton's partners in the Shadowlands. Poor fellow. I just sort of got a good deal out of this. A good mechanic is hard to come by."

"An honest man and a good mechanic. Seems like you got a favorable trade. But when will you let him go?"

The man sighed. "I will let him go soon enough. Anyway...your companion's father is in danger. The Supreme Chancellor…is very interested in keeping your companion in line, seeing how her past is. I thought I should let her...well, you know."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Let's just say I have a vested interest in the success of your mission and your elimination of Malak. There are also rules, even in my business and I don't do kidnapping. Particularly Lord Revan's…family. She retaliates, and her retaliation is quite nasty. We have done business before…Bastila. She normally came to me sans her mask and garb. I respected her enough to keep her secret. We all have secrets after all. However…I can't trust all my "business associates." One of them….well he would think of nothing going for Minden Ravenheart. But here are my terms: Kill this business associate of mine. His name is Hulas. He is on Manaan. Kill him, and Minden Ravenheart will be safe, as Hulas is getting too big for his britches. I also know his servant, gave "Phoenix" a data pad telling her to talk to him. Anyway…Bastila Shan. I trust you won't betray my confidence and if you don't betray mine, I won't tell Phoenix who she really is. Goodbye Ms. Shan. It is a pleasure doing business with you."

I walked out of the tent perplexed. Phoenix looked just as perplexed. "So did you buy anything from that deranged merchant?"

I nodded and "Eli" handed me a few stims as he came out of his tent. "Thank you for shopping with Eli Gand."

"Come on Phoenix….let's get out of here. We need to get to the Shadowlands."

Phoenix nodded and as we wandered past the walkway she paused. "Here…Bastila…I...this is the way down."

I looked downward and gulped. The elevator or basket was tiny and could only accommodate one person at a time. It had a pull cord that once the basket had been lowered could pull the basket back up. I frowned. "Where did you find this, Phoenix?"

"I...I... saw it in the vision of the Star Map."

It was a lie. We had both shared this vision, and I deduced that she remembered something. Yet, why was she obviously lying to me? Did Phoenix know who she was, and Revan was playing me? I went internally into our bond. Despite the dark taint I felt from her, Phoenix was…still Phoenix. However, our bond felt slightly distant, strained and almost muted. I suppose that was natural considering the fact that our relationship had been equally strained.

Phoenix stepped into the basket and she went down into the Shadowlands. After a few moments I was able to pull on the rope, and the basket came back to us empty. Somewhere below, Phoenix was in the darkness of the Shadowlands. I followed down into the darkness, and the others followed me after my descent….

* * *

A/N: Next stop Shadowlands and a grumpy old man. Hope you like this rather interesting twist on "Eli Gand" I always figured there was something a bit more shifty about this character. His disappearance from Kashyyyk seemed rather quick after you confront him with the death of Matton's friends assuming you don't have Matton kill him. I always considered the fact that Eli's background may have been a bit more shifty than previously suspected in gameplay.

Fun fact: A group of ravens is called an unkindness or a conspiracy. Since Revan's, last name is Ravenheart I decided to add this as the title for the chapter.

Ether: Yea… formatting. Bastila's POV it looked fine in my word processor. It also looked fine on Fan Fic's website and then when I used the android app, it is as you say too much of a big chunk of words. So yes I split it up. Thanks for your corrections they are helpful

Vienna Logan: Thanks for reminding me about the long-range comm system…your comment influenced the writing of this chapter quite a lot actually.


	63. 62 Kashyyyk:In the Company of an Old Man

**Chapter 62: Kashyyyk: In the Company of an Old Man**

 **~Jolee Bindo~**

"Hello...I know you're out there...I can sense you."

I sighed at the woman's voice. Wonderful, she was making enough racket to wake up a katarn. How stupid could one get? I suppose I should at least tell her to shut up. There were animals out here that would be drawn to such racket. Apparently, she knew I was out here. It was a good bet that the person was Force-sensitive. As I drew closer, my old eyes blinked. Not her…not again. Didn't she have any sense? Even a tach had more tact than her. I paused as I stretched out my sense and frowned. Different. She felt different. Although the presence was vaguely familiar to the presence, I sensed a long time ago. Was it possible? Come on old Bindo you're getting soft in your old age. However, even Nomi and Cay held out hope for Ulic. I reflected on the familiar presence I remembered.

" _I know you're out here…Jolee."_

 _The voice was deep, hidden either by a voder or Force manipulation, perhaps even both. I frowned, the person who called my name had to have been a Jedi. Only a Jedi could have sensed me deep in the Shadowlands and knew my name. Yet as I drew closer, keeping my presence and myself hidden in the trees, I saw the person. An individual in what looked to be robes and a Mandalorian mask. I snorted, this was rich. I turned away deciding not to pay any heed to them._

" _Jolee...I know you fought against Exar Kun and Ulic's Mandalorian hordes. I need your help."_

 _I turned forward and showing myself to the person in robes and mask I said firmly. "I don't talk to nebulous beings in masks."_

 _The personage laughed. "I am hardly nebulous and no one sees my face."_

 _I rolled my eyes. "Not nebulous and refuses to show their face. Oh, yea...that's a contradiction. What are you doing out here in the Shadowlands, to begin with?"_

" _I've been looking for you Jolee. It's taken me awhile to find your position. But now that I have found you, I need you to hear me out."_

" _Does that voder block out your hearing or are you deaf? I told you...I don't talk to nebulous beings in masks."_

 _The personage chuckled and then folded their arms. "Fine..." They then ignited their lightsaber, a brilliant blue and shoved it in front of me. "If you can disarm me in seven moves or less, then I will allow you to see my face and hear my voice, my true voice."_

 _I smirked and concentrated my power in the Force. The lightsaber hilt suddenly turned red hot and the individual yelped in pain as their saber handle grew too hot to handle and they dropped their lightsaber._

 _They said bitterly, "That's cheating…"_

" _You didn't say how to disarm you, you just said disarm you in seven moves or less and I did. Now remove that confounded mask and let me see who I am addressing."_

 _The individual suddenly laughed as they removed the mask and the laughter dissolved into a woman's hearty laugh. "Well met, Jedi. Well met."_

 _I looked at her. A black haired woman with dark mirthful eyes met my face. She sighed. "My name is Revan Ravenheart, and I am honored to meet the legendary Jolee Bindo."_

 _I snorted. "Legendary indeed…I am not that old to be considered a legend. So how did you find me?"_

 _She smiled. "Do you honestly think the Jedi wouldn't have traced where you went or where you ended up? You left the Order and told them you were leaving. The only other who did that on their own like that became a Dark Lord of the Sith."_

 _I snorted. "Ulic…that overconfident idiot. Look, Revan I am not Ulic...and I don't appreciate the Jedi spying on my comings and goings."_

 _She shrugged. "I suspect the Order is spying on me as well."_

" _Oh...so you left the Order too?"_

 _She nodded. "I did. The Order is a bunch of old-fashioned and out of date idiots who..."_

 _I froze those words troubled me, they reminded me of the words that others spouted. Damn you, Exar Kun! I glared at her. "I want nothing to do with you."_

 _She held up her hands. "Now wait a minute…hear me out. I know you fought against Exar Kun. I know you fought against Ulic and the Mandalorians. The Mandalorians have returned. I could use a Jedi who has fought against them before in my ranks. Join me, Jolee. Join me and fight against the darkness of the Mandalorians. They must be stopped before they overrun the Republic."_

 _"Look Revan, you may be young and hungry for war and for glory, but I am tired. War has made me old, and I am not interested."_

 _She looked at me sadly. "I am not in this for a desire for war or glory. I…I want to save the Republic. I want to save Onderon."_

 _I paused in step because I had turned and prepared to walk away. "And what is so special about Onderon?"_

 _She sighed. "It's my home. My father has sent me messages…the Mandalorians have occupied my home. People are starving, suffering, and dying. Please…I beg of you...reconsider. Billions of people will die. Millions already have. How can you sit here in this forest and let that happen? You are a Jedi, you fight for others who can't fight back. You made that vow, you made that promise!"_

" _Look...I know this is important to you, kid. But I am not a Jedi, I left the Order. This isn't my war...and there has been enough war in the galaxy."_

 _I was so tired, I had lost the only thing that mattered to me. The affairs of the galaxy didn't really matter to me anymore._

 _Her eyes took on a look of fury, and she said angrily, "You're just as bad as the Order. I thought you would be different. I thought you would understand. A curse upon you Jolee Bindo. May you never be happy here again. May this place bring you misery and pain. May you come to hate it. A curse upon your ancest..."_

" _Alright kid, I get the point. A curse on all my fathers and may all my bacon burn! I am sorry...I can't help you."_

I sighed, the next time I saw Revan, she was no longer the woman I had met all those years ago in the forest. Her presence had become dark and I could feel the hate she had not just for the Order but for me because I had refused her previous request. I followed her, cloaked in the Force, to some sort of strange ancient map. She must have felt my presence because she downloaded the knowledge she needed and apparently wrecked the machinery so I couldn't access it. I felt ashamed, maybe if I had joined her all those many years ago, she wouldn't have fallen to the Dark Side. Maybe I could have advised her differently.

From a distance as I regarded Revan, the thought occurred to me, perhaps the Force had given me a second chance. Perhaps...I snorted. _Don't get your hopes up, Jolee. You can still feel that taint of Darkness within her. She may still be lost._

" _...How can you sit here in this forest and let that happen? You are a Jedi...you made that vow, you made that promise!"_

Revan's past voice echoed back into my ears. Fine, I'll go and see if I can save her. Much good that will do, it sure as hell didn't save Nayama.

I finally reached her. "Damn it, woman...you make enough noise to wake up the whole damn forest."

She looked at me apologetic in nature. "I am sorry, but I could sense you and I see your Jedi lightsaber. My name is Phoenix Star…the wookiees mentioned that a hairless one lives here. So are you the hairless one and do you live here?"

I scratched my head. What the devil? Who the hell was Phoenix Star? Something strange was going on here. She clearly didn't recognize me or remembered me. I felt her once again in the Force. There was something…something off about Revan.

Don't let your mouth attract flies, Jolee, say something to the woman. "I am Jolee, Jolee Bindo. And hairless one…hairless one indeed. I'll let you know I used to have plenty of hair and yes I live here. Yea, I know what you're thinking. But I fought the Sith...now look at me, some damn hermit in the Shadowlands."

I noticed others coming down into the Shadowlands, my eyes rested upon another woman. A woman strong in the Force. She looked a bit frazzled.

"Phoenix who is this?"

"Some old Jedi fossil…"

I looked gobsmacked. "Jedi fossil…Jedi fossil, indeed and don't talk like I am not here. Are all young people this rude? My name is Jolee Bindo, and I am not a fossil…yet."

Phoenix suddenly grinned and said in a sassy somewhat cocky and self-assured tone, "Well...you do seem a bit dated. Those Jedi robes look like something from another time…maybe another century."

"Damn it, woman...I told you before I fought the Sith and...If you're going to be this…rude maybe I'll just go back to my home."

The woman next to "Phoenix" said to her, "Phoenix...I sense that this man could probably help us find the Star Map and you are being rude."

Phoenix sighed. "I was only joking, Bastila."

I was slowly forming a picture of what had happened to Revan. I felt saddened, some sort of accident or tragedy had occurred to her and she had lost her memory. I hadn't kept in touch with what had gone on in the galaxy after Revan had left with the information she had downloaded from that ancient computer. However, I felt the stirrings of evil.

I could easily put two and two together, it was a story I knew only too well. Noble Jedi pledges to eliminate evil, they have good intentions and then ends up devoured by that same evil they swore to destroy. I had seen it with that damn impatient Ulic. It seemed that Revan like Ulic had gotten repaid for her actions...in spades. With Ulic, he had been stripped and blinded to the Force and now with Revan…loss of her memory and apparently a new memory put in its place. Probably an action by the damn Order. Didn't they know that this was probably not a good idea? If Revan found out, she'd probably be angrier than a prodded kath hound.

Then that Jedi, Bastila as Phoenix called her, was no doubt urging her; trying to get her to reveal whatever information that damn machinery held in the deeper levels of the Shadowlands. Good luck, the damn machine always muttered about rejected patterns to me.

I snorted. "Of course, and as much fun it is standing here prattling with you two, a damn tach could eat us. What's the matter with you two...you're too young to be standing around here."

Bastila spoke. "We are waiting for the rest of our company, Jolee."

"Of course, more busybodies making themselves at home in my backyard. If it isn't bad enough with those damn Czer..."

I looked at Revan and had an idea. I had to prove in some way she wasn't the same person she had once been.

When the other three members of the "crew" came down, I invited them to join me in my home. Small as it was, I had built it after the manner of the wookiees. Their homes were nice and comfortable. It certainly beat living out of the wreck of my old ship.

Of course, Revan seemed to be impatient and stubborn. She hadn't changed as much as I had expected. Even when I had told her I couldn't help her during the Mandalorians Wars. She hung around for a week thinking that perhaps her persistence and determination could get me to change my mind. Damn, she was stubborn. We had shared stories, Jedi philosophy, and of course food. She disliked my cooking, particularly kinrath stew.

"Seriously...Jolee, we have no time for this."

"Damn you kid, you're here. Your friends are here. You're all my guests and you must all sit down and have some kinrath stew. Then we will talk."

Revan made a face. "You actually eat those disgusting creatures."

Yep, the same dislike for my cooking still remained.

"You don't see a picky wookiee, do you? Of course, I eat them. If the wookiees can eat them, then they are good enough for me."

"But the poison from its mandibles?"

"I make a damn good anti-venom from it, and it comes in quite handy, believe me."

"Now we're going to sit and are going to eat."

I plopped a big plateful of the stewed creatures on Revan's plate. She sighed looking a bit dismal over the quantity of food I put on her plate.

Meanwhile, the Mandalorian and the armor-clad fellow laughed at her.

She retaliated and using the Force plopped a portion of her own food on their plates. I shook my head and put more of the stewed creatures on her plate.

The droid then responded, Statement: Master, I could kill the annoying old man for you, if you like.

Revan shook her head. "No, HK. I rather like him and I feel that he can tell us a lot."

I snorted."Don't coddle me, child. I'm neither a Jedi nor your master. I'm just an old man that's been lost in the woods for far too long. Now eat…seriously, you all look like you haven't had a good meal in days."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Something about this place felt strangely familiar. Maybe it was being in a house gathered around a table and eating that felt comfortable to me. I sighed, it had been awhile since I had gathered like this with my own family.

Kinrath stew…you have got to be kidding me! Who eats these damn things? What about the poison? Although Jolee assured me that he had removed the poisonous jaws and parts. Plus he stated that the wookiees ate them. I sighed and dismally dug into the food that he insisted we all eat. Frankly eating arachnids did not appeal to me at all.

I looked over at Bastila. She too seemed a bit unsettled eating them. Meanwhile, Carth and Canderous dug into them without much complaint. Typical, Carth was a military man, he probably considered eating stuff like this routine. Fresh protein in the Republic fleet was probably considered a blessing from the Force itself. As for Canderous, Mandalorians probably weren't picky where their food came from. Their laughter caused a deep red shade to come across my face. I couldn't help it. I had killed those damn kinrath back on Dantooine and eating them just seemed really disgusting.

I quietly forked some of it into my mouth and chewed as quickly as I could and then swallowed with mass quantities of water. Jolee seemed to watch me taking each bite and seemed to be internally laughing at my attempts to consume it.

I looked at him and snorted. "So glad you're enjoying this, Jolee because I sure as hell am not."

"You better just be grateful for the food, kid. Unless you want to eat fried tach."

I made a face at that as well. "Geesh, Jolee…is there anything normal to eat asides from exotic animals?"

"Nope. I've lived here for twenty years. You get used to it, believe me. At least the wookiees helped me find some wild fruits around here."

I tried to finish my plate as quickly as possible, but as soon as I finished Jolee put, even more, kinrath on my plate.

"Jolee…I am stuffed. I am not a wookiee you know."

"I can see that...but this food will go to waste and I plan on joining your crew by the way."

My jaw dropped and Bastila looked up at the man and stated. "Then I should let you know that our mission is one of secrecy and the utmost importance, Jolee. We are here to find a Star Map to lead us to the Star Forge. It is the only way to stop Darth Malak."

Jolee rolled his eyes. "I see and the problems of a few Wookiees don't amount to anything before the concerns of the Jedi. No, you are here for the map. Yea I know where it is. But…"

He looked at me and said firmly. "Kashyyyk is an interesting place, more so than anyone suspects. If Czerka Corporation knew, heh, the planet would be a strip mine. The Wookiees have their legends that they were not always here, but it is more than that. The trees themselves are strangers."

I snorted. "Legends…look here old man I am not here to hear some old lore about the wookiees. I already agreed to help the wookiees, so I am already aware of their problems. So get to the point…"

He gave me a menacing look. "Oh ho, your manner is fearsome. Like the little ullers, I shoo from the garden, hissing at what they don't understand. Anyway, what I'm saying is that there are literally walls in your way, and you won't find what you need without my help… and my help has a price."

He looked at my friends and then stated, "And this is just for Phoenix, none of you can help her on this."

Bastila frowned and so did Carth. Canderous simply shrugged. HK stated, Cautionary: The old man is hiding something from you, Master. Permit me to blast him to save you the trouble.

I shook my head negatively at HK. "Be quiet HK." I had a feeling that Jolee was testing me in some way. Why?

Jolee then said. "You must do a task for me, and then as I said I wish to join up with your little crew. I will then remove certain barriers in your path."

"Why should I trust you, you crazy old coot?"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, save it. I know this sounds absurd, but I'm old and entitled to work you around a bit. Besides, the test is simple."

A test. I knew it. This crazy old man had been watching me carefully from the get-go. At first, I thought it was simply because Jolee had been here in isolation for so long that he had been starved for company. Now I wasn't so sure. He wanted to test me like Master Zhar had requested with Juhani and the grove. Jolee claimed he wasn't a Jedi or my master, but he sure was acting like both including the fact that I do this on my own without the help of my crew.

"Since they began expanding in the Shadowlands, the Czerka have left me alone, for the most part. Until recently, anyway. A group of them set up camp not far from here. Poachers are all they are. I'd like them removed from this place. "

"I see. So the aged semi-Jedi wants me to get some kids off his lawn."

"Yes, yes, I'm an old man that's getting fussy. Call me foolish if you will, I don't care. The Captain of the lot is the one that earned my ire. Mishandle my garden, will he? Hmph!"

I rolled my eyes, this task seemed kind of trivial to be truthful. Even if it was a test. "Why do you want to join up with me and the others?"

"You presumably have a ship. I've seen all I wish to here. Isn't that enough? I mean, I'm really sick of the trees. And perhaps your destiny might show me something new. You never know."

Destiny? Again with that phrase. Bastila kept mentioning it with those damn visions I had. I wasn't sure I wanted another person harping about my destiny, but then again having Jolee around might be a good thing. If anything else, maybe he'd keep Bastila in line. I could use someone to keep an eye on her even though Jolee seemed to have his eyes more on me than on her. He could at least act as a buffer between us.

"I don't get it; why can't you get rid of these damn poachers yourself?"

"Don't talk back to your elders, child. Look, they know me quite well, and are always on alert when I approach. The only way I could get rid of them would be violence, which would eventually lead to trouble for the Wookiees. I want them gone, but with as little fuss as possible. They have already caused enough trouble as it is. "

I nodded and got up. If this meant I didn't have to eat any more of those damn kinrath I'd do it.

"Alright, I'll go."

"Now remember, if I wanted them dead, I'd have done it myself. Find a better way."

* * *

 **~Carth Onasi~**

Poor Phoenix, it seemed like this old Jedi coot was on her like a hutt. I didn't know what he had in mind, but he seemed to be eyeing her carefully. I laughed as Phoenix seemed to be picky with the stewed kinrath. I had never seen her turn her nose up at fresh meat before. I was beginning to think maybe I didn't know her as well as I thought.

Jolee and Phoenix bantered for quite some time. Finally, the old man revealed his intentions. He wanted to come along with us. I guess I couldn't blame the old man. He probably was as he had said, sick of the trees. I wondered how in the hell did a Jedi get stuck on this world, to begin with. Although that probably would be revealed in time.

He seemed to be setting himself up as a mentor to Phoenix, although he claimed he wasn't a Jedi or her master. He then basically ordered Phoenix on her own to go out and clear out some Czerka scum from the Shadowlands. There was something odd about this whole thing. It seemed as if Jolee wanted to test Phoenix's loyalty or perhaps it was another padawan test like the one Master Zhar had given her on Dantooine.

Bastila watched as Phoenix left Jolee's hut and she looked at Jolee. "I see you carry a lightsaber, Jolee and you said you fought the Sith."

"I follow the Jedi Way and I command the Force, yes, and I suppose that makes me as much a Jedi as anyone… but what of it? Why should being what I am compel me to entertain others with tales of the 'good old days' huh? I've seen my share of the dark and the light. And frankly, both extremes annoy me. Of course... I have felt the rumblings of change..."

Bastila sighed and shook her head. "You are, however, a bit difficult to deal with. It worries me."

"Ah, and it makes you think I may have the taint of the dark side in me, doesn't it? Ooh. Is that what you are wondering, huh? Ooh."

"I can feel the power of the Force within you, old man, but I do not sense the taint of the dark side. I think you are a servant of the light, despite what you claim. "

Jolee chuckled. "Well, I assure you, I see more grey than dark or light. I'm just a stubborn old man, tired of the foolishness of others."

"You sound a bit like Phoenix in some respects."

"Ahh about her. Yes, there is something very dark about her, Bastila."

Bastila looked at Jolee a mixed expression on her face that looked slightly in between horror and in shock.

I frowned. "Dark, Phoenix? Yea, she may make mistakes, but she's a Jedi."

Jolee glanced at me and sighed. "And you seem rather attached to her…"

"Carth…Carth Onasi."

"Well Carth, even Jedi make mistakes. Yet...if Phoenix does what I ask…well….we'll see."

"What does that mean?"

"As I said, we'll see. Your Jedi friend has a rather interesting path ahead of her. But I am old and I am not your mentor either Carth."

"No offense, Jolee but I don't really want a mentor."

"Good, because I don't want to be one, particularly to you either."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Somehow Jolee knew. The old man knew that Phoenix was not Phoenix. However, Jolee had stated he had lived here for twenty years, that meant he had seen and perhaps even knew Revan. Perhaps he even saw her without her mask when she had come down into the Shadowlands to claim the map. It appeared that there was an underworld of people who had always known the truth of Revan's identity. These individuals were loyal enough not to say a word about her, even when she was the Dark Lord. Truly, that was a testament to how Revan could inspire and perhaps even bind people to her will.

I was inspired by her. If my battle meditation and her ability to bind people's loyalty to her could be paired together, we would be a very powerful pair. As a pair, we could bring down Malak. I saw it clearly. Our destiny was clear. However, I had driven a wedge between her and me. How...how could I be so stupid? Yet, I had done so to keep her from knowing the truth. The Jedi Order had commanded me not to tell Phoenix the truth. They feared that if Revan knew who she was she would return to the Dark Side.

I had done my best to keep that truth from her. Yet, I began to wonder if the Order would have approved of the ways I was keeping Phoenix from the truth. I was doing it for the Jedi and for the Order. Yet obeying the will of the Order had damaged my relationship with Phoenix/Revan. I had to somehow repair the damage to our relationship. However, I was uncertain as to how. Perhaps Jolee could help, perhaps he could help us both. Yet he seemed to be more focused on testing to see if Revan could perform a task without violence. I suppose the task made sense, he wanted to see if she was not driven by the Dark side.

If only my task against Hulas was more clear-cut. Jedi do not kill and if they do, it is only the course of last resort. Technically, I was under no obligation to save Revan's father but...she had mended the relationship between me and my mother. I knew Phoenix, she had done all in her power to try and save my father. It had ended in failure, but I knew Phoenix wanted to save him. My heart still ached with my father's death. Despite all my years of Jedi training that said I needed to let go of his death and let go of the pain. I just couldn't let go of the pain in my heart. I knew I owed it not just to Phoenix but to Revan to try and keep her father safe.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I sort of liked the old Jedi. He was no-nonsense and straight to the point. Those were worthy qualities to have and I wished more Jedi were like that. Revan probably was the best in that respect. His food wasn't too bad either. I laughed at Phoenix's dislike of fresh killed and hunted food. That was another reason why I liked the old man, he could hunt and survive in this wild and untamed forest. It showed a lot of grit and determination. There were few Mandalorians that I knew, at this moment in time, that could cut it in this wilderness let alone do it for twenty years.

He seemed to be taking on the role of Phoenix's mentor, despite his insistence to the contrary. What plans he had for her with Czerka was interesting. I wondered what Phoenix would do. If I had been with her, we would have killed them all despite Jolee's insisting she find a non-violent way to get rid of them. Seriously that was the only fault I had with Jolee, despite his saying he wasn't a Jedi he still had a Jedi's fickleness about killing people. I noticed the kinrath still on Phoenix's plate and she left not wanting the seconds that Jolee had piled on her plate. I laughed and helped myself to what was left on her plate. After all, it was a shame to let good food go to waste.

The conversation then turned about Jolee not being a true Jedi and not seeing dark or light in the same way. Hmm...maybe his philosophy could straighten Phoenix out. If nothing else maybe the old coot could get Phoenix to be more of the warrior she was supposed to be. I was determined to get Akume back to who she was and after that, I would tell her without fear who she really was. It seemed that Jolee knew who she was already when he said to Bastila that there was something dark about her. I needed to talk to this old man, he could help me figure out how to tell Phoenix or get her ready to tell her who she was.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I stumbled around in the darkness of the Shadowlands. I disliked this place. It had a dank cold and oppressiveness about it. I cringed as I stumbled among the brambles and fought off a few katarn that seemed to be chewing on bones of old corpses. Eww…when I killed the katarn, I found a droid head. It whined and fussed about their being an error. I managed to tinker with the droid head and it played a recording.

 _Playback: "I don't get it. That merchant said there was salvage down here. We need Matton to work the sensors."_

 _Playback: "When he gets back we'll… wait… I'm getting something. Oh, it's Eli. Good. Maybe he'll point us in the right direction."_

 _Playback:"Eli! What the… But you got your money, you double-crossing snake! We had a deal…_

The sound of blaster fire was heard. So that damn merchant was a murderer…I decided that as soon as I dealt with the Czerka scum and got back topside I'd get rid of him. There was something strange about this merchant that I didn't like and now I knew what it was.

I gathered the droid head up and put it in my pack to confront Eli about later on. From a distance, I saw a fire burning away. Those had to be the Czerka poachers that Jolee had said I had to get rid of before he would help us find the map.

I carefully went up to the captain. He looked at me annoyed. "Who are you, another civil merchant like that core-slime up on the docking ring? This is my territory. I don't make deals and I don't persuade easily, so go back topside. Mess with my profits and I'll see you dead."

This wasn't going to be easy. The captain was firmly convinced I shouldn't be here. Well, he probably was right. Yet, I had a task to perform. I shrugged. "I go wherever I like…I am a hunter and you have no right to tell me what to do?"

The captain said angrily. "You're a hunter, huh? What do you hunt? Go hunt and leave me alone."

"I hunt for wookiee pelts."

"Oh, I see…well hunter…we hunt for tach here and if you want to make some money…."

"I am not interested. I am here for bigger game, not for some tiny simians. "

"Suit yourself…but the tachs have glands that are used not just for medicines but for Tarisian ale. Think girl. We could both be very rich!"

I thought about my future. I intended to leave the Order and marry Carth. Tarisian ale wasn't wine, but I could use a gland or two and try and brew Tarisian ale.

 _You'll fail at it, Phoenix. Besides, you'll probably die facing off against Malak. Stop trying to think_ that far _ahead._

Thanks for the vote of confidence, Revan. So you honestly think Malak will kill me?

 _Only one person could face off against him. That would be me and I am dead._ Revan sighed. Y _ou'll die a horrible death. Whatever rot the Jedi filled your head is just that a bunch of kath crap and facing off against Malak….will end up with you dead. I am sorry, Phoenix...the Jedi have set you up to die._

I shivered, Revan was right. My heart sank deep within me. I was going to die. I remembered back on Dantooine how I believed I could take on Malak.

 _Defeat Malak…is that what they are training you for? That's…that's crazy, Phoenix. You're not even a padawan, and they're grooming you to take on Malak…that's…that's...not my idea of being heroic. Taking on the Dark Lord, that's more like my idea of suicide."_

 _"Carth, it is my destiny. I know it is. Please...don't question the Masters. I…"_

 _"I don't believe what I am hearing! There's a word for that… it's called being brainwashed, indoctrinated. I thought the Sith were bad…but maybe….maybe the Jedi are just as bad."_

How could I be so confident? Frack Carth was right. The Jedi had set me up, as Carth had said. I was being set up for a fall. It dawned on me from my visions that Revan was the only one who was able to face Malak and...cut him down to size. She did cut off his jaw. Sadly what chance did I have against Malak. None. I gave a long forlorn sigh. Yet, if I was going to die, I'd try and die taking Malak with me. I looked at the captain suddenly realizing that if I had no future that credits really weren't that important.

"I am not interested…"

He shrugged. "Very well…I'll keep the offer open if you're interested."

What Revan had said felt like a kick to my pride and my ego. I looked at the men who were guarding what looked like emitters of some sort. I went over to the men. "What the frack are these?"

The man answered. "They are sonic emitters to keep the big predators out."

I pretended to feign interest. "Ooh, predators. Hey, I am a hunter. I am interested in hunting them. If I pay you, 200 credits would you shut them down?"

The guard nodded, and I handed over the credits. The man quickly fiddled with the emitter and shut it down.

I moved onto the next guard and offered the man the same thing. This guard quietly shut down the emitter and suddenly I heard the sound of a loud creature. I gulped there it was a massive creature. The captain and his guard panicked and ran away. The creature went running after them and I laughed.

I heard Revan's laughter laugh through my head as well. _Well done, Phoenix. Well done. I never liked Czerka either._

* * *

 **~Jolee Bindo~**

My door swung open and in stepped Rev…Phoenix a cocky, confident grin on her face. I took in her presence in the Force. Her spirit was clean and did not carry the taint or stain of blood on her. She had done as I had asked. She had cleared the poachers away from the area and didn't kill them.

"I don't sense the smell of death on you. You spared them? Interesting."

Phoenix then looked at me. "So did I pass your little test?"

"If you imagined a meaning behind it, I suppose that's good, but I don't think such a trivial thing is any real measure of a person."

Phoenix rolled her eyes, I could tell she doubted me. However, this wasn't just some unknown woman this was Revan. She may have had her memory altered but some things were still the same about her. She was as she was now notoriously stubborn and seemed to have a sense of knowing that there was something more to this than me just wanting her to clear the poachers away from the area.

"If you didn't care about the outcome, why have me do this?

"You were here, and it needed doing. Besides, dealing with the Czerka is dirty business. I hope you washed your hands."

She folded her arms. "No, have you?"

"Don't get impertinent with me, young lady. You've kept your word, removed the poachers without killing them and now it's my turn to fulfill my end of the bargain. The Star Map is behind a repulsor field that Czerka set up. I can help you get past it. Come on, let's get going."

* * *

A/N: Yea, pretty quick update with this chapter. I pretty much had the flashback with Revan and Jolee planned within this chapter. Since Jolee fought the Sith it only makes sense that Revan attempted to recruit Jolee without much success into the war with the Mandalorians. Considering. The fact that in my own story, Revan and Malak were pretty Dark when they went searching for the Star Forge. In order for Jolee to know Phoenix is Revan….they had to meet at least once on friendly terms.

Either: Yea Bastila is fighting a losing battle with the Dark Side, although I don't think she realizes it. She justifies her actions as doing it for the Order. She's determined to keep Phoenix from finding out the truth but that's slowly unraveling. So now she's resorting to extreme methods even more so to keep Phoenix from finding out the truth. I really do feel for this version of Bastila. She wants so badly to follow the orders/commands that the Council gave her, but it seems to be bringing her in direct conflict with what a Jedi should be. And about last chapter, I removed the bantha poodo from Canderous's pov. It was the first word that came to my mind but you're right, bantha poodoo is more Mission's catchphrase rather than Canderous's


	64. Chapter 63:Kashyyyk:Topside Troubles

**Chapter 63: Kashyyyk: Topside Troubles**

 **~Zaalbar~**

I felt like an absolute coward. Phoenix Star was doing all the work, all the effort in trying to help my father reestablish himself as chieftain and I sat helplessly in Phoenix's ship. I moaned in agony that I was helpless.

Mission noticed my restlessness and said, "Big Z, you're not helpless. You've been helpful, y'know, particularly to me back on Taris."

I shook my head. "But Mission, these are my people and I can't just sit here and let Phoenix do everything."

"What do you want to do, Big Z?"

I growled, "Confront my brother."

"Uhh…maybe you better wait for Nix on this, Big Z."

"No…no longer can I hide and wait for an outsider to help me. This is my people's affair."

"But Big Z, you said you're a Madclaw. Won't your brother or the others that are allied with him do something against you?"

"I am already an exile, there isn't that much he can do."

"Yea, except kill you."

"He could banish me to the Shadowlands, but I don't think so...because he sold our father into slavery."

"Yea, but couldn't he sell you too?"

"Not if…" I gave a long sigh. "I suppose I need to do what Phoenix Star did when we were with the Black Vulkars."

"You mean a ploy of some sort. Yea...what did you have in mind?"

"I need someone to pretend to be my master."

I didn't like the idea, in fact, I hated it. It was repulsive to even admit I had to have someone pretend to be a master to me. Yet, if it was the only way, I could confront my brother without getting targeted by Czerka or have my brother barter me off to Czerka.

Mission cringed. "Yea, I guess... that would work. and it's probably going to have to be a human. So that counts me and Juhani out because I know those bantha poodoo slavers would try and sell Juhani and me as slaves too. My people don't exactly have a good history with slavery either Big Z. And I sort of overheard Juhani's conversation with Nix about her past. I heard something about her about being sold as a slave and the Jedi saved her. So it definitely can't be Juhani or me."

She looked skyward in thought. "Maybe Carth's friend Judo, Jorro…or Jordo...I think...that's his name."

I growled in response, "But he was working with Czerka. How can we trust him not to betray us?"

Mission sighed. "Well Juhani helped save your father and your girlfriend. She was the one who brought Jorro…err Judo….Jordo here. Maybe we should ask her if he's reliable and trustworthy. She is a Jedi, y'know and Nix seems to trust her because she was left here in charge of the ship. So let's ask her if this guy can be trusted."

I nodded. It seemed reasonable enough. Phoenix Star was a Jedi, and even though her actions could be considered questionable at times, everything she did turned out okay. I could trust her to do the right thing. She trusted Juhani and if Phoenix Star could trust her then so could I.

Mission and I went up to Juhani. She was in the garage area of the Hawk practicing her lightsaber combat against remotes. I watched as the Jedi blocked the bolts. She was an impressive fighter, but I could sense her restlessness. Her body was coiled like a spring and she had an itchiness in her step. She probably wished she could have gone with Phoenix Star. In many respects, the cathar Jedi was similar in personality to me. I came up to her and barked out my intent.

She extinguished her lightsaber and looked at me. Perhaps she was tired or because Mission was around she didn't use the Force to help her translate and she looked at Mission for a translation.

"Big Z wants to confront his brother, Juhani and this presents a whole lot of problems. See because if a lone wookiee goes after him, he'll probably end up a slave to Czerka. I can't help Big Z and I doubt you can either Juhani because we're both aliens and from races that could end up as slaves...so that leaves Carth's friend Jor... well Jor something. He's the only human here that can help Big Z but…thing is…can we trust him? You're a Jedi, Juhani so…can he be trusted?"

Juhani nodded. "Trust is an understandable issue. Yet, Jordo could have turned on me when I saved the wookiee slaves on Tatooine. So in answer to your question, yes he can be trusted. He is also a friend to Carth Onasi. I trust Carth. So I see no reason why you should question him about trust. And if you are going to confront your brother, Zaalbar, I would be honored to join you on this quest."

I barked out approval. "I would be happy to have you join me, Juhani."

Mission nodded. "Same goes for me as well, Big Z. No way am I going to let you face your brother on your own. And don't tell me I am some cub that shouldn't go. I am going."

Juhani looked at Mission and Mission stated. "Big Z says he'd be happy to have you join him. So…let's go ask Jordo for his help."

I honestly didn't want Mission to accompany me, but...I looked at her and her features were all scrunched up in a very firm determined expression. She had been the one who had told Phoenix about the sword of Bacca and had insisted she find it. We had been friends since she stuck up for me on Taris. I sighed, I suppose I had little choice but to have her accompany me.

* * *

 **~Jordo~**

I looked mortified at the wookiee who asked me to help him confront his brother. "Uhh we should wait for Carth and Phoenix."

The Twi'lek girl whose name was Mission nodded. "I...well, this is more Big Z's idea than mine. Look, Jorro..."

I sighed. "It's Jordo, and your friend is impatient."

The wookiee growled and I gulped. My time on Tatooine transporting wookiees to the Czerka corps mines had taught me one thing, never ever argue with a wookiee. They could rip your arms out of your sockets, and I had seen that happen.

"Fine...I'll do it. But I don't like it."

Juhani, the Jedi was with the pair and she sighed. "It is Zaalbar's decision, and I agree with you, Jordo, we should wait for Phoenix, Bastila and the others. However, Zaalbar is likely to act on his own without our help and…"

I nodded. "I get the idea. Phoenix will end up peeved off that her life-debted buddy here gets either captured by Czerka or by his own brother; and sold off as a commodity to whoever wants him or to a Czerka slave camp. Plus Carth intends to…" I paused. I didn't want to betray Carth's confidence in regards to Phoenix.

Mission's eyes blinked. "Intends to what?"

She looked at me with a firm look on her face. "Better open your mouth laser brain or I'll get Big Z to do it."

I sighed. "Fine, Carth and Phoenix plan on getting married."

Mission's glare became a grin on her face and she smirked. "'bout time those two finally realized they were meant for each other, and it's all my doing."

She nudged Big Z. "So Big Z maybe this matchmaking thing is my kinda thing. I should start my own business and call it 'Mission's Sentient Heart Match'. Whadya think Big Z?"

The wookiee responded,"I think you're better suited to slicing computers, deactivating mines and being an overall streetwise cub."

"Yea, I guess. But a gal has to think of her future, Big Z and I still think I've found my niche: matchmaking. And part of that has a bit of street smarts to it too. I have to read people to find a match between sentients and it really isn't all that different."

Big Z sighed. "You sound like your brother, little cub. Just be careful and do not end up making the same mistakes he has."

"I am not Griff, Big Z."

Juhani shook her head. "All this is fine and good, Mission. Yet…"

I interjected, "I can't let Carth down. He's had enough heartache in his life. If Phoenix gets upset or something happens to her, he's not going to be happy. I...it hasn't been easy for us Telosians. All that matters to me right now is that Carth has some amount of happiness in his life."

Juhani nodded. "Phoenix already told me the situation. I don't think she is going to be happy everyone knows that she and Carth are...intended mates."

Mission shrugged. "Oh, I think everyone knew she pretty much staked that claim out, Juhani...well except maybe Bastila. I could be wrong...but I don't think she's going to be happy. I don't get it what those two have. Those two are like...well like fire and ice, they don't mix."

Juhani nodded. "You are very astute, Mission. Anyway enough talk about Carth, Phoenix, and Bastila. We were planning on confronting Chuundar, although I am not sure on what."

Zaalbar barked out, "I must confront him about what he has done to our father. I doubt few of our clan know that Chuundar has done. If I can convince…."

An unfamiliar wookiee growl and hoot was heard. "You can't..."

I turned and found a white brindled wookiee behind us and Zaalbar barked, "Wrrljiykam...you would go with me?"

She nodded. "Madclaw...trying to restore your honor. It is hard to restore honor when no one respects you except Outsiders. Your honor is partially restored but...I will help."

Zaalbar barked out a confused reply. You didn't have to understand Shyriiwook to know Zaalbar was asking why.

Wrrljiykam responded, "Perhaps because your Outsider friends believe in you. I do not know why Outsiders would look for the Blade of Bacca for you or your father. It is strange...but if they believe in your cause then perhaps, it is time one of your clan believes in you. It disturbs me that Outsiders would do everything to redeem you but that a wookiee will not."

Zaalbar was quiet, but his features looked a bit floored. Mission squeezed his arm. "See Big Z...that's why we are all here for you. See how...umm, Whirl is."

Wrrljiykam said firmly, "My name is Wrrljiykam, not Whirl."

Big Z sighed. "You must understand, Wrrljiykam. Mission isn't very good with names. She can't even get Phoenix Star's name right either and she is an Outsider."

Mission put her hands on her hips. "Hey...I can't help it that names are not my strong suit. Besides Nix doesn't mind I call her Nix."

I shook my head, that was an understatement. I wondered if Carth had the same issues with her because she butchered my name as well.

Zaalbar suddenly laughed. "You are a poor liar, young cub. Phoenix hates being called Nix."

"Yea...but it grew on her, Big Z."

"You seem to help lighten the mood, young cub. But enough talk, let us go."

Wrrljiykam nodded. "Yes, let's go."

I sighed. "Alright then…it's settled. Two wookiees posing as my slaves. Mission and Juhani are my….slaves as well and we get into the Wookiee village and hopefully, everything turns out okay. I don't know why but I have a bad feeling about this."

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

We walked down the walkway toward the village. Zaalbar sighed. "This walkway is new, probably built by the slavers, but I remember the trees. My village is not far from here."

I nodded. I wondered if Cathar had been a bit like this. I had heard stories from cathar refuges that they sought to rebuild our homeworld. Perhaps when this war was over, I would go home and help rebuild Cathar. It seemed a task worthy of a Jedi, worthy of Phoenix/Akume who had saved my life back on Taris. Taris was gone though and there was a deep hole where my childhood memories were. I had seen Phoenix's face, well Akume's face really. However, I accepted the fact that whatever person, she was now, she was technically Phoenix.

I honestly cared for Phoenix and even though my love for her was unrequited but that was fine by me. She was happy, she loved Carth and I was perfectly content to let Phoenix live out her life as a woman who had finally found a small measure of happiness in her life. I would only end up being intrusive, which I had no desire to be. She clearly had a life that was happier than the one she had lived. I knew little regarding Akume but if she fell to the Dark Side in the past, it was best to let the past go. Her future seemed bright, and it didn't need to be stirred up any more than it already had been. I decided that the Masters on Dantooine were right, her past was dead and there was no point in bringing up a life she no longer remembered. She was Phoenix Star, and that was enough.

We ran into a gate guard who hissed at the two wookiees and Jordo. "Keep your pets on a leash or you'll be wearing them. I've no love for these animals. I've seen guards ripped to shreds."

Jordo was about to speak, and I put a hand on his shoulder and I quickly used the Force on the guard.

"We are nice people. You will like us."

The guard's terse attitude disappeared. "You're not so bad for wookiee lovers...anyway...just be careful out there we can't guarantee your safety.

Jordo nodded, and we went past the gate.

Wrrljiykam growled a bit. "You should have let me rip him to shreds. These filthy Czerka outsiders deserve it."

I said calmly to her, "And what would that have accomplished Wrrljiykam? We are trying to get to your village as unobtrusively as possible. I understand your anger, believe me."

She sighed. "I do not understand Outsider, why you would stay your anger from such filth."

I sighed. "I am a Jedi, Wrrlijiykam. We do not react in anger. And if you ripped them to shreds with your claws wouldn't that make you a Madclaw as well?"

Wrrljiykam said firmly. "Outsiders do not have the same customs or traditions that my people have. Ripping them either with claws or with my strength would be a pleasure."

I shook my head. "Would you rip me to shreds, or Jordo, or Mission to shreds because we are Outsiders?"

Wrrljiykam said firmly, "You are different, you actually concern yourselves with us."

Zaalbar sighed and stated, "Wrrljiykam, a Madclaw is a Madclaw. I reacted in anger and used my claws against my brother. I…"Zaalbar paused."Do not make the same mistakes I have."

Mission nodded, "Big Z is…"

We came across two Czerka guards, and a captain, laying in the middle of the walkway was a dead wookiee. The guards and the captain were bickering among themselves.

"This isn't good. I can't afford this."

"You think I can? Do you know what they get for a healthy one of these things?"

Wrrljiykam suddenly snapped. "I cannot stand here any longer while they kill and enslave us, Zaalbar." She growled and suddenly attacked.

"What the? Blasters ready, men! This fool wants to die! "

I sighed and ignited my lightsaber and began to go to Wrrljiykam's side. Jordo, Mission, and Zaalbar used blasters on the guards and their captain. Fighting against Czerka at this moment in time wasn't really what I had wanted to do. However, Wrrljiykam had gone berserk. I saw a bit of myself in her. Her anger, her rage, and her fury; all of her emotions had been similar to my own back on Dantooine. Her claws went out, and I said firmly. "Don't…you will regret it."

She slashed, and her claws ripped into the Czerka guards. Blood dripped onto the walkway. The guards screamed in agony. I cringed as their pain thoroughly rippled through the Force. I redirected the blaster fire of the Czerka guards it was hard to fight the two guards when Wrrljiykam ripped into them and she blocked my path. Zaalbar moaned and he rushed over to his mate. He grabbed the guards and with a crunching sound of bone, he snapped their arms like they were twigs on a tree. The guards and their captain lay prone and dead on the walkway. Zaalbar looked at Wrrljiykam and said sadly, "Wrrl...you have shamed…us in front of Outsiders."

She moaned, "I could not help it...I am sick of them. When can we as a people walk as free beings and not be slaves to anyone?"

I checked the guards. They were pale and to my dismay they were dead. "Wrrljiykam, anger is not the way. You promised to help Zaalbar and free him from his dishonor, how can you do so by dishonoring yourself?"

I looked at Zaalbar and said to him, "Zaalbar is using your claws against Outsiders make you a Madclaw?"

He looked thoughtful. "They cannot be used against anyone, Outsider or Wookiee. She is Madclaw."

Wrrljiykam growled, "They are Outsider Slavers…they do not deserve the same rights as us. I am no Madclaw!"

He hugged onto Wrrljiykam and began to moan and cry. "This is all my fault.I should never have used my claws against my brother. If I had not...then we would still be together, and my actions would not have polluted you."

I sighed. "So much for trying to convince the other wookiees of Zaalbar's position. Will they listen to us?"

Jordo then asked me,"You're a cathar, Juhani maybe because you come from a people similar in tradition, they might listen to you."

"Possibly but to them, I am still an Outsider. I suppose I will have to try."

"That's all we can do, Juhani. Let's go."

 **~Mission~**

Fracking bantha shit...I watched as Whirl made a mess of things. So much for getting a wookiee that wasn't condemned for their actions to speak up for Big Z; not that I didn't blame Whirl. She had been a slave on Tatooine and finally being back on Kashyyyk she suddenly just snapped. I felt bad and poor Big Z, this was his intended mate. Big Z was acting all gushy towards Whirl. It was...well, it was kind of sweet in a wookieeish way. It was kind of shocking me that Big Z actually had sort of an important life back here on Kashyyyk. I had learned that Big Z was a chieftain's son and had an intended mate. What other secrets was he hiding? Next thing I'd find out was he had little wooks. Well I shouldn't be all that surprised as Zaalbar had never said anything about his past. He seemed kind of ashamed of it. I was kind of getting a glimpse of this life and Big Z noticed me staring at him and Whirl and he suddenly let go of her. He looked at me with a sad look on his face.

He spoke, "I am sorry Mission I never told you anything about my life."

"Eh, it's alright Big Z, as long as I am a part of it."

He managed a smile. "I am honored that of all Outsiders you accepted me for who I am... even now. I thought...well...I thought if you really knew you wouldn't want to be my friend."

I smiled softly. "Then you don't really know me, Big Z. When I stuck up for you against those Vulkers well...I could see you needed a friend and on the mean streets a friend can go a long way."

Jordo sighed. "And I am beginning to hate that I even worked for Czerka. I am embarrassed to have ever been with them. It is better to work for the Republic as one of their hired mercs then...work for a sordid bunch like Czerka."

I nodded. "Yea...well Jordo, you're with us now and that's all that matters."

Juhani stated calmly, "We better get moving, maybe...no one saw Wrrljiykam do what she did."

I responded to Juhani, "Maybe...but wookiees have a good sense of smell, they can probably smell what Whirl did."

Wrrljiykam stated firmly, "I will not lie. If asked, I will tell the truth that I killed filthy Czerka outsiders. They have no honor and so no honor should be given them on how I killed them. I'd do it again if it drives them from our home."

Zaalbar moaned and shook his head. "I wish...I wish I had never struck at my brother…all I have left on this planet is anger and pain."

I said firmly to Zaalbar, "Enough Big Z, we gotta keep moving forward, okay. Live in the moment."

Zaalbar responded, "I will try young cub...but my past must be resolved."

We calmly and quietly continued. Zaalbar grew more and tenser the closer we got to his village. He let out that tension on the kinrath and various creatures that we crossed on the way.

* * *

 **~Wrrljiykam~**

My heart burned with anger and rage since Tatooine. I could no longer hold back my anger on Kashyyyk. Chuundar had to die that was all there was to it. He had sold me and Freyyr into slavery and then there was the fact that he had caused Zaalbar to lash out with his claws. He had clearly goaded Zaalbar into using his claws. Zaalbar still thought that the fault was his for using his claws when really the culprit was Chuundar. Chuundar should be the one considered an Outside or even a Madclaw, not Zaalbar. His actions showed that he should no longer be considered a wookiee. Yet, our people had been blinded by old traditions of honor and thousands of years of tribal customs. Our ways needed to adapt because our world was corrupted by Outsiders and we needed to change because of them. Even Zaalbar's new friends and allies proved this. For me, there was no shame attacking Czerka filth with my claws because they were beyond honor and beyond respect. Why couldn't Zaalbar see that? He too was still blinded by old traditions. As we came upon Rwookrrorro, we were challenged by Rorbacca.

I growled at him, "Stand aside Rorbacca, I have come back to demand retribution against Chuundar."

Rorbacca responded, "Wrrljiykam, you dishonor us by coming back. You threatened violence upon the great Chuundar. He said he sent you away in exile to learn a lesson among Outsiders."

I snorted. "Is that what the runt told you? He sold me Rorbacca. He sold me and Freyyr. You are disgusting allying yourselves with the Czerka. Shame on you and your family."

Rorbacca responded, "And you shame us by being with your disgusting madclaw mate."

Zaalbar growled. "You leave Wrrl out of this Rorbacca. She came of her own freewill."

"I see madclaw flith hanging around Outsider filth."

The cathar suddenly position herself in front of Zaalbar and me. Her hand moved strangely and she said calmly. "You wish to take us to Chuundar."

Rorbacca said blandly. "I will take you to see Chuundar."

I blinked, what had just happened?

Rorbacca moved silently and guided us into the chieftain's hall. Chuundar growled angrily at Rorbacca and he quickly left as apparently, Chuundar didn't wish for us to be in the hall.

Chuundar's face bore three claw marks down his face where Zaalbar had clawed him, there was no denying what had happened between the two brothers.

He spoke, "Wrrljiykam...I didn't think I'd see you again."

I growled. "Traitor…did you think I'd so easily not return. I have returned, and I have brought the one that will bring you down."

Chuundar suddenly laughed. "You brought a crazed Madclaw. Do you not realize Wrrljiykam that he cannot help you or are you truly deranged by your own hate for me?"

Zaalbar interjected, "You are flanked by Czerka slavers! Have you sold all of Kashyyyk to them?! "

"Ah, brother Zaalbar. You've been exiled a long time. You shouldn't speak in that tone. Things are different now. You are a madclaw without honor. You have no voice among your own people. I, on the other hand, am Chieftain. But it is just as well as you are here, brother...if you had not come, I would have brought you here anyway."

I growled, "Typical of a tyrant whose thinking is polluted by Outsider filth."

The cathar spoke. "Chuundar, ignore them. You are dealing with me now."

"You are mistaken about your worth, Outsider. You have no leverage here. I have made certain my people only listen to me. They trust me, the mighty Chuundar. Even with my brother insane and our father enslaved, I rose to protect my people, despite it all."

Zaalbar growled, " "Mighty Chuundar?" What are you talking about? You were the runt!"

"I am no runt! Like I said, Zaalbar, a lot has changed in your years away. Now I know about your other friends in the Shadowlands. I could have Czerka or our clan hunt them and bring them down, but instead…I think I shall keep you and your loyal mate as leverage."

Juhani and Mission's jaws dropped, and they both spoke together, "What!"

Jordo suddenly spoke, "Now wait a minute, Zaalbar and Wrrljiykam are my slaves. I have a right to keep them and not have you take them."

Chuundar snorted. "Slaves…I know slaves and know they would never speak out such as you allow them. You have no authority here, Outsider. I do not know what your friends in the Shadowlands intend to do but if they want to see my brother and his mate then I suggest you contact them. If they do not show up I cannot guarantee that they will still be here."

I moaned. "I will see you dead...Chuundar...I will not be a slave…yet again!"

"Or what...you will claw me like your mate!"

I growled. "Perhaps...it is obvious that you are no wookiee."

"There will be no fight. You wouldn't survive. The village believes in me. They would rise to kill you. I also have the protection of Czerka Corporation guards as well. No, you have no chance while I am unopposed."

Zaalbar moaned, "Peace Whrrl…Phoenix Star will help us. I believe in her. She won't let us be sold off as slaves."

I sighed and looked at the outsiders that accompanied us and the cathar spoke. "Be patient...Zaalbar is right. Phoenix won't let this happen. I won't let it happen, by the Force…we will return."

I moaned. "I hope you are right…"

Chuundar growled. "Better get a move on..." He looked at the Czerka guards that flanked him and they suddenly moved on the others. I growled. "Wait...you said they wouldn't be harmed!"

* * *

A/N: I am not sure if I am completely happy with this chapter. I keep feeling like something is missing but I am not sure what it is. Maybe more combat, maybe more action from other characters. I just feel like something is lacking. Yet, I felt like this chapter was necessary because something needed to be done between Chuundar and Zaalbar while the others are in the Shadowlands.

Next chapter….Mandalorians, a Terentatek , a Star Map, and a cathar in a desperate bid to reach and contact the others before it is too late.

Ether: Yea Bastila, all her decisions seem to make sense. She may actually have some help later on or at least someone to confide in...she kind of needs it actually. And woops on gland, glans...heh...something spell check does not really check for. lol


	65. Ch 64: Kashyyyk: A Matter of Honor pt 1

**Chapter 64: Kashyyyk: A Matter of Honor Part 1**

 **~Phoenix~**

"Hurry up, Jolee. The sooner we get past this shield and into the lower regions of the Shadowlands the better. We need to get the Star Map, find the Mandalorians, get Bacca's blade and then leave."

Jolee snorted at me. "I wouldn't be in that big of a rush to leave, kid. You know you remind me of someone...he was just as impatient as you were."

"Frack...this is no time for some damn recollections, old man."

"You got a smart mouth on you there, you know that? If ullers could talk, they'd sound like that. How impatient can one person be? You must have driven your mother mad. All that gurgling and fussing… heh, babies are cute but annoying."

"Can I help it I am on a tight schedule?"

"When you get to be my age, kid, not saying you will...seeing how reckless you are. You'll find out that schedules are really not all that important. Time passes on regardless."

"Well, it will pass on if we don't get past this shield…Jolee..."

"Alright...fine. I can manipulate it for a moment. Let me see... how did the Czerka engineers do it?"

The field flickered and then went down, and we went through the barrier.

Jolee then stated, "These are the most dangerous depths of Kashyyyk…"

"And that's supposed to scare me?"

Jolee shook his head. "If you're smart…maybe you'd heed my warnings, kid; instead of trying to pretend you're something special. You do realize that most Jedi who thought that way, ended up crashing and burning."

"Did I ever say I was something special, Jolee? Besides what do you care, you're not even a Jedi."

"That's true...but you really ought to mind your elders more. Seriously, I bet you burned your hand on the stove as a kid because your mother told you not to touch it."

"Actually...it was my father, and it was the engine compartment of some farming equipment we had and he warned me not to touch it. I...well I wanted to see how it worked as a kid and..."

"Got more than what you bargained for, didn't you?"

"I sliced my arm open. Hurt like hell...but a little kolto and my arm was good as new."

Carth frowned. "You never said anything about that to me."

I shrugged. "Why? Do you talk about all your childhood mishaps, Republic?"

Canderous chuckled. "Even Mandalorians end up doing stupid things as kids. At least Phoenix admitted to some sort of bonehead childhood mistake. Seeing how she acts as an adult…"

Jolee interjected, "Doesn't seem like you learned anything from that experience, kid. And speaking of engine compartments…"

"A story…great…."

Bastila said firmly, "Maybe you should listen, Phoenix. You could actually learn something."

Jolee gave Bastila a nasty glance. "Don't you butt in...if Phoenix wants to listen, that's her choice."

Bastila shrugged and was quiet.

"Do I honestly have a choice?"

"No…anyway...where was I?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Oh yes, any way you remind me of someone. Pleasant enough fellow, great destiny… all of that. Breath like a bantha."

"Is that a comment about my breath? After all those damn stewed Kinrath you literally shoved down my throat, my breath probably reeks."

"No, but it could be. An Anduvian salt tablet would clear that right up, you know."

I shook my head.

"Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes. Andor Vex was his name. The Force swirled around him like a hurricane, that's how great his destiny was."

I sighed. "Great…here we go with the destiny thing. I suppose you see the same thing with me."

"Well, it's not so much a hurricane as a slight breeze. But that doesn't mean anything: destiny is sometimes in the eye of the beholder. Well, it turned out that poor Andor believed a wee bit too much in the infallibility of that destiny. That overconfidence turned out to be his downfall."

"Are you trying to tell me I am overconfident?"

"I don't know. Are you overconfident? I hadn't noticed. Even if I had, I would never comment on it. We're talking about Andor, remember? Let's see… oh, yes. Andor's downfall. I was pretty young, myself when it happened. At the time, I thought that Andor's destiny couldn't be more boring."

"As boring as this story?"

"You know, if you keep interrupting, it will take even longer. Have you no patience at all? How did you get as old as you are anyway?"

"I have no idea…maybe listening to people like you…."

Jolee shook his head and continued. "I was just about to abandon Andor to whatever the Force intended for him when his ship was overtaken by a dimean warship. Now, you've probably never heard of the dimeans, but at the time they were a nasty lot led by a nastier overlord named Kraat. Tall fellow. Big teeth. Kraat had us hauled onto the bridge of his ship for questioning, and that's when I knew that Andor's destiny was at hand."

I snorted. "You knew…how did you know that?"

"Swirling Force, remember? Jedi here? Granted, I was just interpreting the signs, but we get trained in that sort of thing. More or less. Well, Andor decides that his destiny makes him invulnerable and starts making all sorts of demands. Free me now, I'm not answering questions, blah blah blah. Don't you know who I am? Kraat decides he's had enough and begins crushing Andor's neck. I told the boy he should have kept his mouth shut. I think he agreed, too… or those could have just been gurgling noises. Well… well, anyway. Finally, Kraat has enough of Andor and tosses him aside into this giant energy intake shaft. Andor gets sucked in and starts bouncing around, heh, screaming… heh. Maybe Andor hit something sensitive on the way down or just didn't agree with the reactor core, next thing I know all the ship's alarms are ringing."

I rolled my eyes. If this was, the sort of thing Jolee saw in my destiny which was indeed possible seeing how I probably was going to die facing Malak and...

"Everyone panics and I run, barely making it to the ship in time before the explosion. Kraat dies horribly, and the dimeans never quite recovered. Changed the political course of the entire sector for centuries to come. I'd call that quite a destiny, wouldn't you?"

I folded up my arms, yea I'd end up taking Malak with me and this story hit way too close to home. I stared at the old man. "That's sick...I hate you, old man."

"Well, now, that's the ingratitude of youth for you. I relate an exciting tale and do I get thanked for it? No, no, it's all 'me me me! Hmph."

"Exciting! I hardly find getting sucked down into an energy shaft and dying with your enemy exciting. Besides what does that have to do with you coming with me?"

"Well, hey, the chances may not be great, but when one has the opportunity to see something like that twice in a lifetime…"

I sighed. "Anyway...you finished your story…let's go. I'll try and see if I can make sense of all your ramblings, old man."

Jolee chuckled. "Sometimes ramblings are just that ramblings and other times...well heh, you never know. Someone has to knock some sense into that head of yours."

"I ...I'll…I'll keep that in mind."

We continued into the depths of the Shadowlands. Somehow Jolee was trying to tell me something I was sure of it, the old man had the potential to be cryptic not that that was surprising. Most Jedi were.

I considered his damn story, aside from the ominous that I was likely to die facing Malak.

Bastila interrupted my thoughts, and she edged closer to me and whispered. "You seem awful quiet, Phoenix. Are you alright?"

I quietly said back "Did you know…?"

"Know what?"

"This whole mission is a suicide mission and that the Jedi are setting me up to die."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I looked dumbfounded at Phoenix. This might explain part of her animosity towards me, well at least part of it. I knew I had really muddled things up with her with what I said. She believed she was going to die when she confronted Malak.

I sighed, there was that possibility that Revan could die against Malak, she wasn't exactly Revan anymore. Yet there were times….I saw glimpses of the old Revan. The question was how much of Revan actually remained. Phoenix was right, she could die against Malak because there was no guarantee that she could even kill Malak without herself being killed in the process. My heart ached suddenly. It was clear Phoenix had doubts, despite the fact that she had killed Bendak and Sherruk, but these two weren't Malak. Malak had been Revan's friend. No doubt the two had trained together, perhaps even spared and learned the Force together. There was truly no one out there that could with absolute certainty defeat the Dark Lord except Revan. I was with a woman who was and wasn't Revan. Could she fight like the Revan of the Mandalorian wars or fight like the Dark Lord she had been? I honestly didn't know. I looked at Phoenix and said softly. "The possibility exists..."

Phoenix said tersely, "Were you going to tell me or wait till I face Malak directly?"

"Doubt is your own worst enemy, Phoenix. If you believe you can defeat Malak…then perhaps you can."

She shook her head. "I am only a padawan, Bastila, what chance do I truly have against Malak? Perhaps...well Jolee's story only reminds me I am overconfident and my destiny maybe similar to Andor Vex's."

I put a hand on her shoulder to try and comfort her, and she shoved it away. "Don't touch me, Bastila. We are bonded to each other but you're not my friend. You and the damn Order, lied to me...you made me think I actually had a chance against Malak, that my destiny made me invulnerable somehow, but I am not. If I do survive this...and that's a big if. I am going to ask the Jedi to do all they can to break our bond...being bonded to you disgusts me. You're like a damn weaselly bothan, self-serving and looking out for only yourself. If I do die facing Malak… I hope... " She paused and then said bitterly, "I hope you feel that pain through our bond and that you end up dying with me. Maybe then you can understand how I feel."

Phoenix turned and accelerated her pace and left me behind. I sighed, so much for trying to make up with her. I tried so hard to deny everything but I just couldn't. I loved her, and I had lost her forever. She was the only woman, the only person I felt this way toward. I may have had crushes towards others in the Enclave. Yet, Revan…Phoenix was the only person who truly made me break my oaths regarding attachment. She made me feel different. Now that was gone. Was this what the Order wanted? Whenever Phoenix got close to the truth, lie to her? I felt sick inside. How many more lies would I have to tell, how many more ways could I prevent her from knowing the truth? My devotion to the Order meant sacrificing whatever I felt for her. Yet telling her the truth... the truth ended everything and lies ended everything. I was doomed, there was no future for us. I had been blinded with what I felt for her. There was only the Jedi code and there was only the Force. The only option left to me was to throw myself into my duty as a Jedi. Yet why did it feel so empty to me, even Juhani felt more peace than I did. How could a cathar be so centered and at peace when I felt so much turmoil?

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Jolee's story seemed to upset Phoenix. Although Phoenix and Bastila tried to keep their conversation afterward private. Phoenix's voice raised and I heard her say in an angry tone.

" _Don't touch me, Bastila. We are bonded to each other but you're not my friend. You and the damn Order, lied to me...you made me think I actually had a chance against Malak, that my destiny made me invulnerable somehow, but I am not. If I do survive this...and that's a big if. I am going to ask the Jedi to do all they can to break our bond...being bonded to you disgusts me. You're like a damn weasely bothan, self-serving and looking out for only yourself. If I do die facing Malak… I hope… I hope you feel that pain through our bond and that you end up dying with me. Maybe then you can understand how I feel."_

I didn't know if I should say anything or support Phoenix at all at the moment. She was clearly upset. Bastila seemed upset as well. Damn that old man and his story, it was apparent that he had caused Phoenix to question her whole resolve on this mission and made her realize she was very much a fragile and mortal creature. Perhaps it was simply the nature of being a Force user to be overconfident and think that one couldn't die. Yet, Jedi history was filled with knights that ended up dying. However, Phoenix really didn't need that at this time. She needed to believe in herself and not think she was going to die going up against Malak.

I went up right close to the old Jedi and hissed in his ear, "Damn you old man, Phoenix needs to believe in herself and you've got her doubting her whole resolve against Malak."

He shrugged. "Don't blame me, sonny. She obviously had doubts way before I told her about Engine-sucking Andor. I just brought them out to light. Besides...maybe she needs to have doubts before she can realize she can do whatever she has to do against Malak."

"That's dangerous, Jolee; what if she doesn't recover her nerve in time?"

"Then she's likely to crash and burn against Malak. But I wouldn't really worry about her, Carth. She'll sort it all out eventually and if she doesn't...well, that's why we're both here, are we not? You obviously care about her."

"That's beside the point."

"Is it? You wouldn't be up in my face crying out that I am hurting her. You love her, don't you?"

I sighed and then nodded.

"Good...I say. But you know about phoenixes…right?"

I frowned and scratched the unshaven stubble on my face. I really needed to shave but had little time to see to my own personal grooming.

Jolee shook his head incredulously as if I was an idiot. "They die, they burn up in a fire, and they are reborn. Interesting, don't you think?"

"Okay, old man you lost me, does this conversation actually have a point?"

Jolee rolled his eyes as if he was annoyed at me. "You may end up in the path of her fire when she burns and you're hardly fireproof, sonny."

I shook my head. "That's just a bunch of old myths and legends. And someone named her after those creatures."

"Legends…ehh...what do I know? I am just an old man. Love her, Carth. She's going to need it, I think. Badly. More than you realize."

"Love advice from an old Jedi? No offense, but I thought Jedi didn't believe in love."

Jolee snorted. "And why not? All this nonsense about avoiding love is so much foo-foo. I shouldn't be the only one that realizes that. And that's enough on that. I'd rather not comment too much more about what I know about love."

I raised an eyebrow and sighed. "Are you saying I should show her that love now?"

Jolee glared at me. "Are all Republic soldiers that dense? No one is telling you anything. It's a wonder that you and her are even together in the first place."

I walked up to Phoenix. Jolee suddenly paused. "My bones ache...I need a rest." He took a seat on a stump and the whole party stopped. Damn that old Jedi was prodding for me to be with Phoenix, but I couldn't argue with him. Phoenix did need someone to help regain her confidence and that was obviously left to me.

I went over to Phoenix and grasped her hand and we wandered a little bit further into the bush away from the others. "Hey, Beautiful."

She smiled softly. "Hey, Republic."

"I..." She lowered her head, and I took my hand and lifted her head up. "Hey now, you're going to get through this. Never mind what I said back on Dantooine."

She looked at me glumly. "Carth...I am going to die. I am going to end up like Jolee's Andor. I'll take Malak down, and I'll end up dead in the process." The tears began to pour down her face. "I am scared, Carth...I don't…I don't want to die."

"Shh, you're not going to die. You're the strongest woman I know."

Well aside from Morgana, but that was beside the point. Phoenix was a capable Jedi. She didn't always fight though, sometimes she gained the advantage by stratagem rather than a fight. Yet facing Malak, I knew as well as she, that stratagem wasn't going to cut it. She would have to fight and whether or not she could defeat Malak remained to be seen. However, I couldn't let Phoenix get bogged down with the fact that she might not make it out of that confrontation alive.

"I've seen you in combat, Phoenix. You'll defy the odds. And what is it you Jedi say? 'Trust in the Force.' Besides, Jolee is just a crazy old man. He's been here what...twenty years? Frankly, if any of us were stuck on a planet like this for twenty plus years, you'd start going crazy too and start spouting nonsense about old dead companions and friends."

I quietly rubbed the tears from her eyes and from her face. She tried to take my words to heart, but I could tell it wasn't working. She was still crying and sobbing her eyes out. "I'd like to believe that…Repub...Carth. But he's a fracking Jedi, Carth and an older one at that. I…I sense Jolee knows things about my destiny that I don't."

I snorted and held her face up and stared firmly into her face. "Look Phoenix…stop the damn pity party. You were so willing to die when a damn rackghoul infected you and now you don't…"

She shook her head. "But that was before you and me…If I die...I'll leave you…I don't want to leave you, Carth. I...I love you."

Damn it all…her fear of dying was all tied towards me. I remembered telling Phoenix how I had lost my wife and now it all made sense. She didn't want me to be left alone once again. I sighed. "Oh, Phoenix…"

Tears began to lightly come from my own eyes. Damn it, I was supposed to be strong for both of us and here I was becoming an emotional wreck with her. I cupped her face and suddenly kissed her. Her arms enfolded around me and she submitted to the kiss. Finally letting go of her lips. I said softly. "If you're worried about our future..."

I gulped, what was I doing? The words came so easily from my lips. "Let's get married, Phoenix. I know you wanted to wait but...damn it...let's not."

She nodded and she said. "Who? Where?"

That was a good question. I doubted anyone on Kashyyyk could do it. "Well, maybe not now but Manaan…there's a Republic embassy there. The ambassador could do it."

She nodded. "Okay…Manaan then."

She seemed much more settled, her fears seemed to subside. I squeezed her shoulders and she smiled. I honestly hoped I knew what I was getting into. I still barely knew Phoenix. Yet, damn that old Jedi fart, he had been right. Phoenix needed my love, my stability. Although I was pretty sure this wasn't what he had in mind. At least I assumed that wasn't what he had in mind. He said something about a phoenix burning. I couldn't quite figure out what that old man was getting at. Plus getting married to her, well it was quintessentially getting really close to her. If what the old man had said had any merit at all...provided he wasn't just a crazy old man, I was going to end up being burned. However, how in hell was I going to settle Phoenix's fears if I didn't commit to a life in marriage with her? And that life with her might end because of a damn Sith Lord. Yet, considering my life, I pretty much felt like I had been burned by fire as well. My closest and trusted mentor had betrayed me and the Republic by joining the Sith. To top it off my mentor, along with Revan and Malak burned Telos and killed my wife. Finally, there was my son, and according to Jordo, he was deeply ensconced in the Sith's academy. Fire had already tempered me. Whatever fire Jolee claimed that Phoenix had that could burn me, I was pretty sure I could handle whatever that was.

Jolee had a wry look on his face, and he stated,"The Star Map isn't too far from…"

A low moaning howl came from the Shadowlands, it sounded like a wookiee.

* * *

 **~HK-47~**

My master was the most confusing meatbag I had ever met. Of course, the affairs of organic meatbags were an eternal mystery to me. Yet, my master, Phoenix seemed even more confusing. She seemed to share what meatbags would term as feelings with the Jedi meatbag Bastila. My auditory receptors heard, despite the whispering of their voices, that she committed her life to the Republic meatbag Carth. This was almost as bad as when she called and asked me to torture the trash compactor and then basically reneged on it. My behavior core was going nuts. I wanted to kill something and every time I wanted to, my master firmly said no. I suppose I should expect such from a Jedi. I glanced over at the meatbag Bastila, Jedi supposedly had keen hearing and there were tears glistening in her eyes. She muttered something about dust but my sensors did not detect any such particulates in the air. I could tell my master and the meatbag Jedi woman were at odds with each other and perhaps this had something to do with her tears.

The moaning howl came from the Shadowlands and I lifted my blaster rifle ready to fire.

My master suddenly gasped, "What the frack?"

The furry meatbag came stumbling out into the open and fell to the ground.

She ran over to a bloodied and wounded wookiee meatbag. The wookiee moaned in its own language, "Please help me…attacked...they came out of nowhere…was unarmed. Metal helmeted warriors. Cowardly outsiders."

The Mandalorian meatbag snorted as Phoenix translated for the other meatbags. He added, "Cowardly is right. A true Mandalorian would allow their opponents to fight with there weapons and not result in this sort of thing."

"Please…I am dying...help me."

My master said firmly. "What makes you worthy of my help? How do I know you're not a spy sent by Chuundar?"

I gave my approval, Statement: Well assessed master, you make my behavior core glow.

The meatbag Bastila shook her head. "Phoenix...he's dying...this isn't the time to be suspicious of every wookiee we run into down here."

The Republic meatbag was abnormally silent, but he nodded at my master as if he approved of her distrust.

The Mandalorian meatbag seemed to share the same stance. He also nodded at my master, a grim line appearing on his lips.

My master rolled her eyes, "Because...I suspect our arrival in the Shadowlands has probably been watched. I am sorry...Bastila. This wookiee running into us is…oddly convenient."

The old Jedi meatbag snorted, "He's wounded…what do you expect him to do? Attack us!"

My master sighed. "Fine…I'll treat him. But...there is something odd about this whole damn thing. Something doesn't feel right to me about this."

She dug into her bag and retrieved some medpacks and started pumping them into the furry meatbag.

The furry meatbag responded, "My name is Grrrwahrr. My party was ambushed by these cowardly helmeted and armored Outsiders, they attacked us when we were unarmed."

My master's eyes narrowed. "What were you doing here in the first place? Were you spying on us?"

"Argh...no, we were hunting."

My master's head shook negatively. "I don't buy it. I haven't run into that many wookiees since we came down into the Shadowlands."

I noticed her hand moved deftly, and she said firmly, "You will tell the full truth to me and our party."

The furry meatbag responded,"I will tell you the truth. Chunndar sent us to spy on you and your party. He wonders why you are down here and what your business is. We were attacked by these filthy outsiders while we were spying on you."

My master stated firmly, "See…I told you! A spy...I am not stupid, Bastila. Maybe…"

She sighed and her eyes softened. "Look Grrrwahrr, you are at my mercy. I could kill you for such distasteful behavior, but I will spare you under one condition."

Grrwahrr stated, "What do you want from me?"

"I want you to swear loyalty to Freyyr, your true chieftain. He is with me on my ship. I want you to pledge to fight on his side. Chuundar is a usurper, and he is harming your people. He sells them as slaves. How could your people support such a dishonorable creature? "

Grrwahrr growled, "You do not understand tradition, Outsider. To oppose the current chieftain of our clan is to declare yourself a traitor. Yet...if you say the legitimate chieftain Freyyr is here, I will swear and pledge myself to him and not Chuundar. However, there is one thing I must ask of you."

My master glared at the flea infested meatbag. "You are in no condition to bargain. And as for traitor…your current chieftain is a traitor. He deserves death for selling his own people as slaves. I've seen enough to know that traitors and their followers don't really deserve…"

Grrwahrr responded cutting my master off, "Hear me out, Outsider."

The Jedi meatbag Bastila spoke, "Please, Phoenix hear him out…compassion and mercy are Jedi traits."

The old Jedi meatbag stated, "I am not fond of Chuundar either, kid…but at least hear this poor wook out."

My master stayed firm. "I consider myself a fair woman. I also consider my actions reasonably fair. I don't like traitors and I don't like their followers…but swear Grrwahrr….swear loyalty to Freyyr, and I will hear your request."

Grrwahrr spoke, "I swear by the roots of the great Wroshyr trees of Kashyyyk that I will serve Freyyr and will fight on his side." The fleabag then added, "However, I would have done so willingly, Outsider. I have no love for Chuundar but a wook has to be careful. Chuundar has many allies. But now may I speak?"

My master nodded. "Go ahead."

"I ask for you to kill the helmeted ones, the ones who killed my party who went with me. Bring me back the helmet of the leader and I will fight to restore the true chieftain to power. I would do so myself but...I am still very weak. You will find them if you disarm yourself and go where others of my people lay dead."

My master nodded and then said, "I already agreed to Freyyr that I was going to do that. One other thing…do you know where the blade of Bacca is? Freyyr has need of it."

Grrwahrr spoke, "Yes...outsider…I can help you on that as well. You must sacrifice a kinrath close to the place where a great beast resides. It is not far from here. You will see the stones where such a sacrifice must be made. I will stay here, Outsider. As I said I am weak from my last battle with the metal fighters."

My master spoke, "Fine enough, Grrwahrr your help has been most beneficial and I am sorry if I seemed a bit gruff but..."

"You are a fair and just one, Outsider. Fairer than that Czerka scum that Chuundar has allied himself with."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I sighed, so much for warning that thick headed Republic soldier about getting too close to Revan. Apparently, those two were thicker than wild forest honey. My old ears overheard that he was willing to marry her. I really ought to tell him who he was getting entangled with but...it wasn't my business. It really wasn't. The Force obvious had some plan for Revan. Whatever plans those were I couldn't interfere with them. My interference last time with my own wife really bungled things up, and I didn't want to bungle things with Revan.

If that Republic soldier wanted to marry Revan then, that was his affair. Yet, Revan's pessimistic mood melted away when Carth asked to marry her right away. I heard Bastila mutter about dust and I snorted lightly to myself. Damn it, it seemed like Revan had wormed her way into others really good. It was apparent from what I had seen that Revan had had relationships not just with Carth but with Bastila.

From what I had learned from Revan, during her visit to recruit me, she ended up having two relationships in the past. One with some Jedi named Liam and the other with that damn accursed Malak. Although Revan didn't feel the same way about Malak. This was clear considering the way she talked about him. He had called her Master after they left the Order and that was even before they had turned to the Dark Side. He had been completely devoted to her cause or perhaps completely obsessed over her. Yet, Revan had been a good friend to Malak, or so she had told me.

She had met him when she had been a youngling and he had been sneaking into the Coruscanti Temple and stealing food from the cafeteria. She had caught him but instead of turning him over to the Masters she hid him in her room. She dressed him in her robes and fed him food from her own plate that she ended up sneaking to him from the cafeteria. She laughed over it as an adult and I laughed with her on how the Masters could be so dense not to notice an eight-year-old boy in her room. She eventually was caught and begged the masters, no she demanded that Malak be trained in the ways of the Jedi. Even as a nine-year-old she could sense the Force within him. She had even taken it upon herself to teach him a few basic Force skills that she had learned. Yet as Revan had told me the masters believed Malak had been extremely emotional as a child and that he was too old to be trained. She stated that her reasoning as a child was once Malak was taught even a few basic Force skills, the Masters would have no choice but to train Malak. She believed that a child with even some skills could obviously not be ignored.

I sighed, her story reminded me way too much of my wife and me. I wondered perhaps it would have been different if I had trained Nayama some basic skills first as Revan did with Malak before approaching the Masters about training, They would have scolded me of course, but perhaps they would have agreed to train her once she had even a smidgen of training. Yet, I had been too much of a proper padawan those days about Jedi training. I had believed that the Masters would have her trained as they allowed Nomi Sunrider to be trained, so why not Nayama? I had been such a naive fool. If I had…perhaps bah…I could not deal with perhaps or maybes, Nayama was dead. I had killed her, training her had been the surest path to her death.

But with Revan's childhood meddling, it was no wonder that Malak saw Revan even then as his Master. Apparently, the compassion that Revan had for Malak warped the poor boy. He truly thought that Revan's affinity towards him was a form of love. I supposed it was, but it wasn't one that Revan reciprocated. She loved Malak but it was more like the love a sister had toward a brother. Malak must have been thick even as a Jedi, to confuse brotherly/sisterly devotion for romantic attachment. It seemed to me that Bastila had fallen for Revan and had ended up in the same sort of misdirected love/affection.

Revan was a complex individual and apparently so was Phoenix Star. If that was who she was. There was a good deal of Revan within Phoenix, and I noticed it. Even the memories that Phoenix spouted seemed like things Revan would have done, up to the point of not listening to her father and that she had sliced her arm open on farming equipment. The Jedi had done a good job implanting fake memories within her. It probably had Revan fooled completely because the memories probably felt right to her. It did make me wonder why hadn't Phoenix figured out she was Revan. Was she scared? Was she so thoroughly convinced by fake memories that she was Phoenix Star that she was blinded by the truth of who she really was? Maybe it was her love for Carth that made her deny who she truly was. I couldn't figure out why Phoenix hadn't figured it out yet that she was Revan. Oh well….my contemplation was ended by the mournful wounded howl of a wookiee.

I suppose that Phoenix's reaction shouldn't really have surprised me any considering who she really was. Carth seemed to silently affirm her decision that the damn wookiee couldn't be trusted. Of Course, Phoenix did have a valid point. We hadn't seen too many wookiees in the Shadowlands. Hmm…

I watched as she used the Force to get at the truth and sure enough the wookiee had been sent along with others to spy on us. I chuckled briefly to myself as I watched Bastila cringed at Phoenix's very demonstrative use of Force compulsion. Yep, the damn Jedi of this era were being taught to be stodgy about such Force use but if it got the job done, it was worth it. Revan...err Phoenix wasn't your typical Jedi that was obvious.

She got the information she wanted and his loyalty to Freyyr. I had to admit that Revan was damn efficient when she wanted to be. She got instructions on how to find the blade of Bacca and where she could find the Mandalorians. She handed the wookiee some bandages, kolto packs and said firmly. "Be prepared to fight Chuundar when I get back, Grrwahrr."

The wookiee nodded and Phoenix handed me her lightsaber. A double-blade. Hmm...the double-blade had been made or perhaps rediscovered by Exar Kun. Exar had been a very proficient lightsaber fighter. His damn skill had impressed Nayama. She had watched him fight against Credo and Sylvar and was clearly enamored by him. Damn that contemptible man. I took the blade and eyed it disdainfully, I looked at Bastila, and eyed her lightsaber, she too had a double blade. Damn it, had the Order gone daft since I was gone? I ignited Revan's blade a deep purple color issued forth from one of the bladed ends. I found the other activation button and activated the other blade. Ahh….they were two single blades that connected together. I pushed another button and the blades separated into two single blades. I looked at Revan, of course, she would have stylized a complex lightsaber err lightsabers.

"What's the matter, old man. Don't like my lightsabers?"

"You youngsters always have to make such complicated weapons. Ehh…why hand me your weapon?"

Revan spoke, "Because I am going in alone unarmed against the Mandalorians. They won't come after us unless we're unarmed. So I am taking that risk."

Carth's eyes went wide, and he shook his head. I knew what he probably was thinking, how could Revan whine about being killed by Malak, but go without fear to face a group of Mandalorians?!

He finally spoke, "Wait a minute, Phoenix...you are so troubled about...Malak but you're going to take on a group of Mandalorians!"

"Mandalorians aren't Malak...this group are a bunch of gutless cowards, no offense to you, Canderous."

Canderous laughed. "No offense taken, Phoenix. You speak the truth; they are a bunch of gutless cowards."

Revan then said. "Alright…here's the plan. I am going into the thick of the Shadowlands without my weapon."

She then pointed at me and Bastila. "Jedi…"

I snorted. "I am not a Jedi, Phoenix."

She rolled her eyes. "You have a lightsaber, Force powers…that makes you..."

I sighed. "Yea, I suppose..."

Then that annoying Jedi princess had to interject. "I know you have... issues... with the Order. But you are a Jedi, Jolee. You command the Force. Without the guidance of the Council, how can you avoid falling to the dark side?"

"Well, I've managed to avoid it the last twenty years or so. Besides, light side, dark side: they don't mean the same to me as they do to you. I don't see in absolutes."

Revan spoke. "But...the Dark Side does exist, Jolee...I mean Revan, and Malak are proof of that."

I rolled my own eyes. "That's true… and I want to stop Malak same as anyone, but one doesn't need to have the Force to know good from evil and act accordingly. Look at Carth or Canderous. They're with us in this quest, but they aren't Jedi. The capacity for good or evil, like the Force itself, is in all living creatures. And belonging to the Jedi Order, or the Sith, or any group, won't change what you are at your core."

Bastila sighed and shook her own head. "I see you are quite adamant. No doubt you've had ample time to think on this during your long seclusion. I guess it was foolish of me to think I could sway your position so easily."

"Yeah, I'm old and stubborn. But I appreciate the effort. But from now on you can just think of me as any other non-Jedi in our little group - with a lightsaber. And Force powers."

Revan chuckled. "Fair enough...Force user. Anyway, commanding the Force basically makes you the same as any other Jedi in this group so…assorted Force users. Here's the plan. I am going deeper into the Kashyyyk forests. You and Bastila follow or lag behind me in a vee formation. When I am attacked, Jolee you Force push me my lightsaber blades."

She turned towards Carth, HK, and Canderous. "Carth, Canderous, and HK you tag behind in a line and when you hear the lightsabers hum you provide the firepower.

I noticed Carth's eye arch in a strange manner. Of course, Phoenix spouting military formations seemed unusual to a woman that was supposed to be a smuggler. After all what business did a smuggler have in knowing such things?

The damn HK droid responded. Statement: Master, your tactics make my behavior core glow with pride.

Canderous snorted. "No way, Phoenix. I want a piece of this. These renegades deserve my anger."

She sighed. "I understand, Canderous, but there is more to this than revenge. The wookiees asked for my help in getting rid of them. I know a certain amount of Mandalorian pride is involved in this but..."

Canderous interjected, "Look I've respected you this far, Phoenix but this time...I refuse to be back up. I am joining in the front with the rest of the "Force users" as you put it."

Revan shook her head in disapproval. "I see." She ran her fingers through her black hair. "You're not making this easy, Canderous. I had a perfect formation on this now…I have to come up with a new formation one that supports…" She paused in thought then stated, "Give your weapon to Bastila. You'll follow with me in the center, Canderous. We will face your people together, unarmed. Carth and HK will be in the back. When we are attacked, Bastila will give you back your weapon."

Bastila nodded.

Canderous smiled. "Thanks, Phoenix."

Revan grinned. "Don't thank me yet, Canderous, if we end up inert on the ground…I'll blame you for it."

Canderous laughed. "I don't intend to end up on the ground, Phoenix."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Perhaps it was being in the company of Jolee, or perhaps her newfound confidence; or perhaps it was the fact she was going to get married to Carth, but Phoenix was acting more and more like Revan. I didn't like the fact how she compelled Grrwahrr to admit to being a spy. Nor did I like how she commanded us to follow her into the Shadowlands against the Mandalorians. She did not even defer to me or ask what I thought. She simply said do this, and everyone followed her. It felt natural, and I watched on in horror. I said nothing and I looked at Jolee to see if I could get a sense of what he thought or felt. He merely complied with her, same as the others. He also seemed to have a wry smile on his face. Damn that old man, he was enjoying this. He seemed to relish watching Phoenix acting like Revan.

I sighed as Canderous handed me his blaster rifle. I then spoke softly, "Phoenix…I could aid you with my battle meditation...if you wish."

I wouldn't have normally used my battle meditation in this conflict, in fact, I probably was disobeying the council by my suggesting its use.

"You can't fight when you meditate can you, Bastila?"

"Yes, I've tried to perfect my meditation, so I could fight and meditate but…I require absolute concentration in order for my battle meditation to work."

Phoenix shook her head. "Never mind then. I need your support in combat, Bastila. I am going to be unarmed, so I need you."

I nodded. "Very well then I will stand and fight by your side…"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I raised an eyebrow at Bastila's words. I had yelled at her; said I hated her and she remained devoted to the mission and me. I thought I was fracked up in the head but it seemed as though Bastila was even worse.

 _She's only fracked up in the head, because of you and that damn bond, Phoenix!_

I snorted internally, yea she's fracked in the head because of you, Revan.

 _That's probably true._

You're agreeing with me!

 _Don't be too surprised, Phoenix. You're not completely thick...like a hutt's backside._

Hey, I resent that!

Revan laughed and her voice faded away.

I sighed, this whole possession with Revan was strange. I think I actually was getting use to her snappy comments and her commentary.

Don't get comfortable, Revan, as soon as this whole Star Forge thing is over and done with, I want you gone. I'll figure out a way to get rid of you.

Revan chortled _good luck with that little Jedi._

I looked at our group, and I said, "Come on...let's go."

I went in first into the deepest forests of the Shadowlands. My heart pounded within my chest, but I didn't feel fear. No, this was like being within the crystal cave back on Dantooine and killing the kinrath queen. I never felt so empowered with the Force then as I did back in that cave.

I gave Canderous a slight grin. I could sense the Mandalorians before they even deactivated their stealth generators. I felt like a hunter of prey. I knew that such feelings were not fitting for one who was supposed to be a Jedi. Yet, I honestly didn't care. I believed the Force was more than just the Light or the Dark. Yea, both sides seemed to be rather annoying. Jedi were too drawn toward the Light and Sith too drawn to the Dark. Revan had a point about balance. There was moderation found somewhere in between. Yet how could I weld both sides without being too extreme in either? Was it even possible? Yet, Jolee seemed to fit a comfortable stride. He claimed he wasn't a Jedi and yet said he followed or at least followed a semblance of the Jedi way.

The lightsaber went right into my hands, from Jolee, and as soon as three Mandalorians appeared before my eyes. Canderous grabbed his blaster rifle as Bastila flung it towards him in the Force. All was going according to my plans and the Shadowlands echoed with the hum of lightsabers and the sounds of blaster fire.

The Mandalorians remained stoic and said not a word as the lightsaber, blaster and melee weapons were drawn and blows thrown and blasters fired.

Canderous said nothing as he fired his blaster and glared at the Mandalorians, clear disgust in his eyes.

Carth ended up breaking the line and came to be by my side in combat and I glared at him. "Republic...get back into the formation."

He looked at me with a sheepish look on his face. "Sorry, Phoenix but I outrank you." I managed to miss a glancing blow toward my midsection from one of the Mandalorians from their vibroblade that would have skewered me right in the stomach.

"Right, Captain Republic. But this is a Jedi mission and technically you're under our command but still, you're a terrible captain, Carth if you can't follow orders."

Carth chuckled. "Sorry, but I promised I'd protect you and this is part of that promise."

He fired his brace of blasters and the Mandalorian I was fighting collapsed in a dead heap before my feet.

Canderous chuckled. "Nice one, Republic!"

HK broke the line as well and I sighed as he responded, Statement: If the Republic meatbag can disobey orders so can I."

I groaned. "Bloody hell, Republic look what you've done, now my own droid won't follow orders."

"HK, get back to the line."

Chiding Remark: No, Master. Like the Republic meatbag states about protecting you. I too am programmed to protect you."

"You can protect me by backing off…you murderous bucket of bolts."

Exasperated Statement: But master, you wound me…

My target being taken out. I went over to Bastila to help her out. She cried out in pain as the melee weapon of her Mandalorian opponent cut into her shoulder. I gasped in pain. Damn that bond, we had.

The blood dripped down her shoulder and I turned toward her attacker and we both struck against the Mandalorian, our double-blades going in a mad circle of yellow and purple as the Mandalorian tried to block our blows with his vibroblade. His armor getting dented. Soon, we'd cut past the armor and hit flesh, it was only a matter of time. However, a shot by HK's blaster hit the Mandalorian square in the chest and he groaned and fell to the ground dead.

Jolee was thoroughly engaged in combat. I stood back in amazement and apparently, Bastila looked on equally impressed because for an old man Jolee seemed pretty strong and in shape. Apparently living in the Shadowlands had kept him in good shape.

He snorted. "I'm not here to satisfy your curiosity! No staring at the old man, that's what the sign says, dammit! Now stop staring at me and help me!"

I chuckled. "Whatever you say you old fossil."

I joined Jolee in combat. Bastila meanwhile was out of combat as her arm-wound kept her from using her lightsaber. With most of our opponents dead, Bastila stopped and tended to her wound.

Our blades interacting with our opponent. We were close to ending combat when Canderous, held up his hand and stated, "Hold off…Phoenix, Jolee. I wish to talk to this man."

We nodded and we deactivated our blades.

Canderous then said, "I am Canderous of Clan Ordo. Why are you attacking unarmed wookiees, I demand an answer!"

The Mandalorian laughed. "Canderous Ordo, is it? What a pathetic being you are. Fighting with Jedi and Republic dogs. I suppose after all that you've done…"

Canderous snorted. "At least I fight with honorable beings who don't fight others who are not armed. You…"

"Nardan of Clan Fett."

"A Fett. You disgust me, even Cassus was a more honorable member of your clan than you are."

Nardan snorted. "We are here training, Ordo scum. What are you doing here?"

Canderous stated firmly, "Seeking out worthy opponents. You could join us, Nardan."

I frowned, I barked out, "Canderous, what the frack are you doing?"

"Trying to save my people from oblivion, assuming Nardan Fett is willing to surrender. He is after all outnumbered."

Nardan laughed. "Outnumbered indeed. I simply have to press my comm unit and two more squads of my group with come and fight with me."

Canderous snorted. "This is pointless, Nardan."

"Is it, Canderous? You that murdered your own people on Althir."

Canderous growled, "Dishonorable slime. You know nothing…" He threw down his blaster and grabbed a melee blade that lay on his waist and plunged it into Nardan's already dented and weakened armor before Nardan could attack any further.

Nardan groaned and fell over dead.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

Phoenix glared at me. "What happened on Althir, Canderous? What has you attacking your own people without giving them a chance to fight back?"

I snorted. "I only attack people who claim I murdered my own. That's not what happened."

"Then tell me what did happen, Canderous. You forced us into a truce and then you break it! What kind of hutt slime does that!"

The assassin droid stated. Observation: Yes, very efficient. It is what I would do.

The old Jedi snorted, "Of course that's what _you_ would do."

Carth rolled his eyes at the assassin droid but was mostly quiet. He seemed to be contemplating all that was going on.

Phoenix spoke with an angry tone to her voice, "Look, Canderous there are two other squads of Mandalorians out here. I think you need to tell us what the frack happened with you on Althir before we face them."

Meanwhile, Bastila had managed to bandage up her wound. "Yes, Mandalorian, what did you do on Althir?"

I sighed. "Alright…during the Mandalorian Wars, my unit managed to defeat a force of Althiri ten times our own size. That battle gained me command of an entire sub-sect of my clan. For five days they had managed to hold off our forces, keeping us to the outer rings of their world, preventing us from attacking it directly. My task was to assault one of their flanks with a false attack. The Althiri would be drawn out by the units I had sent in. Once they had surrounded those units, the bulk of my forces would attack from the rear and defeat them in detail. "

Phoenix stated, "And how do your people claim you murdered your own?"

"Things did not go as I had planned. I saw an opening – a mistake they had made in the disposition of their forces – and took it! While fending off our main force, they had let their fleet split in two! The center of their entire fleet was left exposed! I turned my forces and assaulted the center of their fleet, decimating them!"

"So you fracking disobeyed orders!"

I glared back at Phoenix. "You don't understand, Phoenix. This is a chance given to a warrior once or twice in a lifetime. The chance to change the course of history in a single act. Their slow, ponderous ship could not turn to face us without being overwhelmed. Their command vessels were destroyed in seconds. Their ranks were thrown into chaos. It was most amusing to watch the surviving ships scatter and flee. Several even tried to dive through the plane of the rings to escape us! They were shredded by the rings, or crashed into rocks, or were destroyed by our forces as we pursued them. Warriors do not flee from a battle if they are losing. They fight to the end! Revan understood that and I thought you would understand that as well."

Phoenix sighed. "I see and in the process of disobeying orders, members of your people were killed. I am sure that won you a lot of friends, Canderous!"

"I did what I felt was prudent, Phoenix. We won that battle and we took the planet. If you were in my stead would you not have acted in the same manner?"

Phoenix paused in thought and then stated, "I don't know, Canderous. I honestly don't know. I think I would have had to weigh the benefits of the conflict and determine if those lives lost and the outcome was worth it."

"Well I did, Phoenix. I considered those lives lost were a small price to pay for the overall cost of victory."

Phoenix nodded. "Yea, but I doubt others saw it that way."

"If they didn't then, I wouldn't consider them true Mandalorians."

She rolled her eyes. "Maybe you're not a true Mandalorian, Canderous."

"What! How dare you insult me like that, Phoenix?!"

Phoenix held up her hands. "Just saying, Canderous. I agree with your concept, but you abandoned others; others that were your brothers-in-arms in the pursuit of victory. You let them die rather than stand with them. Some might say that makes you a Mandalorian of dubious standing."

I raised an eyebrow and then sighed. "Damn you, Phoenix, do you have to play both sides?"

She shrugged. "A true warrior or military strategist has to look at all sides and see from all angles. You should know this, Canderous."

I raised an eyebrow, was Akume slowly regaining her memories? I looked at Bastila. She lightly paled at Phoenix's conversation with me. It was so obvious that Phoenix wasn't who she claimed to be. I looked over at Carth as well. He too seemed to be pondering over this as well.

I spoke, "Phoenix, how do you know all these things? I mean the military formations…the military stratagem?"

Phoenix grinned. "Read a lot of books during my long hyperspace travels and I saw a lot of things smuggling weapons. I never thought that all my reading and smuggling would come in handy."

Damn it all, the Jedi had programmed her with such obvious lies. "There is only so much reading and surveying one can come up with. Most things come with practical applic…."

Bastila quickly interjected; fracking Jedi. "Phoenix is obviously a quick study on such things, Canderous. After all, she completed her Jedi training in a matter of weeks. What can we say but the fact that she is truly gifted."

Carth looked at Phoenix and seemed to be contemplating who or what she was. How could he be so blind? Or was he so much in love with her that he could overlook who she truly was. He smiled softly. "All I know is that Phoenix has been an excellent and gifted soldier since Taris. I've been with her since we crashed on Taris and I agree with Bastila, her skill….it must come from the Force."

I rolled my eyes, damn that soldier was so infatuated with her he was completely undiscerning as to what was going on.

Jolee snorted, he also rolled his eyes but said nothing about Phoenix. I felt like I was surrounded either by idiots or co-conspirators.

He then said, "Enough talk about war, combat, and tactics. We should move forward and find these other Mandalorians."

HK added, Statement: The "Old Jedi meatbag fossil" is correct, master. We should move on. If we don't move on we will be unable to find any more things to kill."

Phoenix shook her head. "Damn it HK, you and your one track mind!"

Apology: I am sorry, master.

Query: Can I help it that I find pleasure in the termination of squishy bulbous organic meatbags?

Phoenix glared at the droid. "Yes…yes you can. If I ever find your original programmer, I will have them reprogram you."

Statement: But master, that is an inefficient waste of your time. For all, you know and I know, my original maker maybe dead. And if my original master approved of my functions and is still alive, I doubt they would let me be reprogrammed.

Phoenix sighed. "Enough talk…let's get moving on."

* * *

A/N: And because this chapter was getting way too long and I generally prefer medium length chapters that most people can get through. I decided I have to break up my chapters. I thought I could manage to get in the Mandalorians, the Blade of Bacca, the Star Map, and Juhani all in one chapter. I guess I was a bit over ambitious in many respects because I then decided to add the whole Canderous and Jagi challenge to the chapter and this chapter is getting long enough. I guess because the whole KOTOR game is soooo long that even with changes and some minor modifications this story is going to be over 100 plus chapters. * **Sighs***

Also the whole Malak calling Revan Master during the Mandalorian Wars comes from The Knights of the Old Republic comic books. Yea I've been reading them. Although I do wish they had more Malak and Revan in them.

Ether: Added a couple of sentences about Wrrl's and Z's work on the Czerka guards. It's a tad bit more graphic but just a light added touch.


	66. Ch 65:Kashyyyk: A Matter of Honor part 2

**Chapter 65: Kashyyyk: A Matter of Honor Part 2**

 **~Phoenix~**

I stood looking at the speeder bike in the middle of the Shadowlands. Hmm...this felt a bit like déjà vu to me. The term was a very old term in Basic which meant I had already seen this or went through it before. Well of course it was, I had seen a similar speeder on Dantooine and I had issued a challenge to the Mandalorians there.

I looked at Canderous and said. "Okay, unless you have any better ideas. It's your turn to announce you're here. If Nardan knew about you, it would be a good bet that the leader of this group knows you personally. Any guesses on who that could be?"

Canderous sighed and looked irritated. "There were several Mandalorian clans involved in that battle on Althir, Phoenix. Trying to figure out who I angered is like looking for where exactly your Star Forge is without the Star Maps."

I sighed. "I am sorry if I am being hard on you, Canderous. Is this…"I paused."Is this why you ended up on Taris, away from the rest of the Mandalorian clans because of what you did on Althir?"

Canderous responded, "Part of the reason. The other reason is that Revan set up a treaty among the Mandalorians. After that final battle, those of us that survived were stripped of our weapons, our armor, and our Basilisks as part of that treaty. Revan's forces destroyed them while we were forced to watch. I had nothing left. Our families, our clans were starving out on the rim. It's not like the Republic would help us. No, we were villains in the eyes of your people, Phoenix. I left the clans, so I could earn money to support my family and provide food for them. Yet my people are nomadic by nature, Phoenix. My clan left and did not share where they had gone."

"There is so much that we didn't understand about you or your people, Canderous. I still don't fully understand your people. I want to though, but...you don't make it easy. Your people push away outsiders. I want to understand...help me…to understand."

Canderous looked at me. "If there is anyone I would want by my side during a challenge of my honor, Phoenix it would be you. I..."

He paused, he looked as though he was thinking very deeply and then a confident grin appeared on his face. "I shall name you….my daughter and give you the name Akume. It is the name of a Jedi warrior. A warrior under the Jedi General Revan. You would honor me, Phoenix if you accept her name."

Bastila paled and then glared at Canderous. Canderous gave a nasty glance back at Bastila. I wondered what the frack was going on between those two. I knew those two didn't really like each other. However, that was a given with Canderous. He didn't seem to get along that well with many except perhaps me.

Canderous grabbed a knife and grabbed my hand. Carth's eyes went wide, and HK held up his weapon.

Statement: Harm the personage of the master, and I will kill you, Mandalorian meatbag.

"Back off HK, I don't think Canderous intends harm."

Canderous nodded, and he suddenly sliced my hand letting the blood drip and then he sliced his own hand and he pressed his hand and mine together. I recognized an adoption rite. It wasn't the first time that Mandalorians had offered to adopt me. They had wanted to make me a wife to some damn clan head but I refused and killed the man who dared to adopt me through marriage. The Mandalorians respected me enough to let me go my way after I had refused adoption and was willing to do so by force of arms. At the time, I didn't want any part of the Mandalorians. However, before I could refuse this adoption Canderous had his hand and mine pressed together. He even had given me an adopted name. The name wasn't even a Mandalorian name he pressed upon me but of a Jedi that he apparently he knew had fought with Revan during the Mandalorian Wars. This only made me wonder who the frack was Akume?

He grunted, "Our blood mixes. You are now Akume of Clan Ordo. You are no longer fatherless, Akume. I am your father. When the cry of the clans comes once again, you must answer that call along with the others of the clan."

Bastila looked on in horror and said, "Phoenix…you're loyal to the Order and the Republic."

Canderous said forcefully, "Her name is Akume, Bastila and she is loyal to…"

"Her name is Phoenix, Mandalorian…"

I suddenly laughed amused at the trivial fight that apparently Canderous and Bastila had over my name. I then stated, "I am Phoenix Akume Lynn Star Ordo soon to be Onasi…I imagine the wedding invitations or my stationery will be a mess soon enough."

Bastila shook her head and stated, "This isn't time for one of your jokes, Phoenix and you can't get married to Carth."

"Why the frack not? It's my life. You don't control me, Bastila!"

Carth grabbed my uninjured hand and said firmly, "Phoenix will be my wife, Bastila. You can't stop us."

Jolee meanwhile shook his head clearly disgusted with where this all was going and opened a channel on the speeder bike. He had a wry grin on his face as he coughed and began to speak.

Canderous glared at Jolee. "What the hell are you doing old man? This is supposed to be my challenge, not yours."

"Then stop having a pissing match with Bastila, Carth and Phoenix.

Canderous snorted. "The old man is right. This whole thing can wait. Regardless, Akume is my daughter and she will join me in this challenge against my honor."

I nodded. I could sense that this meant a lot to Canderous. I looked at Carth and Bastila. "Enough of this, I promised Canderous I'd help him out and I will. I can't do that with all of us bickering over...inconsequential things at the moment."

Canderous smiled and motioned for me to come over to the speeder. "Come Akume, we will do this together as father and daughter."

It felt strange for Canderous to call me his daughter and to call me Akume and Carth's eyes flashed with something I had learned to read as jealousy. Frack, I couldn't please anyone. Why was it that everyone that traveled with me ended up having feelings for me? Am I cursed or something?

Canderous wanted a daughter. Carth wanted a wife. Bastila…well, Force knows what she wanted. She was hiding shit from me. Maybe she wanted a lover/companion or was it a sister? I wasn't sure. For being bonded with her she kept her bond with me pretty damn closed. Juhani, she tried to pursue me in a relationship which I quickly turned down. Mission thought of me as a sister, at least I didn't try to…well...Mission was too damn young to think of as anything but as a sister and then there was Zaalbar. He had life debted himself to me. Finally, Jolee seemed drawn to me as well. What was it about me that all the members of the Hawk that seemed drawn to me? Even T3 and HK seemed to draw towards me. This sort of attention somewhat scared me, I didn't want it.

 _You're a magnet of personality, Phoenix._

I sighed internally. I just want my old life back, Revan.

She laughed. _Good luck with that, you're either blessed or cursed with the Force, Phoenix. You're not going to get away from it. The Force surrounds us and penetrates us: it binds the galaxy together. And you're a part of it. Once you are inducted into it, it's part of you forever. Even that old fossil you are now with knows that despite the fact that he tried to hide from it for a good portion of his life. You can't run from what you are, Phoenix. I know you want to…but you can't._

I felt very sour about Revan's words. I felt trapped, trapped by the Force and trapped by those around me. I wanted to run. I began to feel like I did back on Taris. The old feelings I had spoken with Carth about wanting to be a free spirit and not ending up being used. I craved my old wandering lifestyle, the lifestyle of being a smuggler floating from place to place with no home and very few connections. I missed that life. Revan was right as much as I wanted that old life, it simply wasn't going to happen.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

Hah! Take that you spoiled little Jedi Princess. I had given Akume back her true name and the galaxy had not fallen apart like Bastila had assumed it would. She had no idea that I had adopted her with her true name, but it was one step in helping Akume reclaim her true identity. Bastila could do nothing about it. I motioned for Akume to join me in my Mandalorian challenge and put an arm around her. Carth glared with a possessive glare. Frack, I had no romantic feelings for Akume. I was too old to consider any sort of relationship between her and me except the one of a daughter and father and I felt for her as such. Yet, try telling that to Carth. He loved her, and I certainly wasn't going to step between either one of them. Of course, Bastila was an idiot to try and do so but Jolee ended up being the voice of reason and drew us back to the challenge.

I looked at the open comm connection, coughed and cleared my throat and spoke. "This is Canderous of Clan Ordo. You dare to mock me...come forward. My daughter Akume and I will slaughter you both where you stand and she's a Jedi."

Akume glared at me with a hard look. "If I can end this without bloodshed. I would prefer it. Daughter or not…I am still a Jedi."

I sighed. "Fine. I won't argue with you. But don't be surprised if this blows up in our faces."

Akume nodded and she sighed. "So I suppose being a member of your clan has fringe benefits…Cand…"She paused a moment as I glared at her and she apparently tasted the words in her mouth."Father."

I grinned and said. "I know that word is going to take some time getting use to, Aku…"

She shook her head. "Please...I'd rather you call me Phoenix and even if I am your daughter...I would prefer…well can I please call you Canderous? This whole thing seems...well it's too sudden. I...well...I'll try and get use to it...but..."

I chuckled a bit. "Fair enough...if it makes you feel better I will call you Phoenix Akume."

Akume nodded. "It's a start...thanks, Cand..."She then grinned."Well, daughters get to have names for their loved ones. Can I call you Candy?"

I groaned, leave it to Akume and her quirky sense of humor. She used our father and daughter relationship to get away with this. She probably wanted to call me that all along. "Yea, sure...but if anyone else does. I'll kill them."

She suddenly laughed. "That sounds like a father to me. Okay Candy Man..."

"You're pushing it Phoenix Akume…"

She grinned. "What are you going to do to me Candy Man, kill your own daughter? Not even Mandalorians are _that_ heartless about their relations."

I sighed, I supposed I asked for it adopting Akume into my clan. At least I had a daughter with a very witty personality. I just hoped that tongue of hers didn't get her killed.

The Mandalorians deactivated their stealth field generators. One of the Mandalorians removed their helmet revealing a very familiar looking man.

"Jagi? I…I thought…"

"You thought I was dead, didn't you?! You thought all of us that you had sent on that attack had perished! You sent us to die in a foolish attack while you directed your forces elsewhere! You broke from the battle plan and let us die for it, so that you could have the 'honor' of being the first to the enemy commander!

Akume looked at Jagi and said calmly. "You should know that tough decisions come in war, Jagi."

"That does not excuse what he did to us!"

I snorted, "As I've told Akume, I… I did what was prudent at the time. If I had not done it, the battle would have…"

"The battle would have been won anyway! I am tired of your excuses, Canderous. I will not rest until I have had my vengeance!"

Akume spoke, "And poisoning the minds of others around you. Do others have to fight your battles and your challenges?"

Jagi glared at Akume. "I am not afraid of you. And if you choose, you can die by his side as well! I challenge you Canderous. I challenge you to fight the fight you fled that day above Althir. If you fail to challenge me, you and your daughter, you both shall be stripped of all honor and forever cast out of our society! These other clan members shall witness our fight. The others, the Outsiders, they are not allowed to participate. Since Akume has been adopted, she will be allowed as a member of your clan but the others…if they even take one step to attack, you will be stripped of your honor, Canderous."

I responded, "That suits me fine, Jagi. I refuse to let you soil my name."

The four other Mandalorians behind Jagi nodded but said nothing and Akume spoke. "Are they allowed to fight with you, Jagi because if they are then that is not a fair fight? Five against two is a dishonorable fight."

I snorted. "I will spread you into a paste over this forest floor, Jagi. No matter how many of you and your group fight me."

Akume rolled her eyes. "Is it really necessary to fight? I am sorry but you're both acting like children."

Jagi responded, "Yes, but children who can... er... what?! You do not know what you're talking about, Jedi!"

"This is a matter of honor, daughter. I cannot stand by this insult. I must do this."

She rolled her eyes. "Insults to honor! What good is any of it! Seriously is there any point to this? Do you both even have to fight?"

I glared at Akume. "What kind of daughter are you?"

"The kind that is a Jedi. I told you before. I would prefer this didn't end in death. You both are being fracked in the head. The clans are scattered, weakened, ineffective. You kill each other, you only give Revan and Malak more power over both of you and you prove that what Revan did to the clans and to Mandalore broke all of you. Maybe you both deserve to kill each other and wipe out whatever remains of the clans and prove that Revan was right about all of the Mandalorian clans. You all deserve to die a pathetic and slow decaying death."

Jagi and I both turned towards, Akume. Damn her words!

I spoke to her, "But...my honor..."

"Can be proved in other ways. Jagi…people die in war. Canderous did what he had to do to win the battle."

Jagi sighed. "But why…why did he have to sacrifice us?"

"I saw a chance and had to take it. It ended the battle quicker than we would have otherwise, and many of our warriors may have died. Mandalore taught us that opportunism and flexibility in battle were to be admired. You may contradict me, but do you contradict him as well?"

Jagi looked pained. "I…" He then sighed. " I see that I have been wrong. I have not been true to the teachings of Mandalore. You were right. I was wrong to question your honor. But I must now cleanse mine with my life."

Akume's face took on a look of horror. "Wait…stop….don't!"

Jagi took a blade and sliced his own throat, the blood came pouring down his neck. His eyes rolled back into his head and he collapsed in a heap dead. Akume knelt beside him. She looked on in shock and disbelief. "Damn it all…."

The other Mandalorians looked at Jagi's corpse and the Mandalorians looked at us uncertain what to do. They looked at their weapons and then glared at Canderous and hissed. "Traitor! Death to the Jedi and Death to the Republic.." They suddenly rushed upon us weapons drawn.

Jolee came rushing behind her and protected her from a blow from a vibroblade that would have decapitated her. "Damn it kid, you can't save everyone."

She rose to her feet and activated her lightsaber blades. She fought, but it wasn't with the full vigor that I knew she had. She seemed distracted and listless. HK came up and tried to cover her. Statement: Master, you cannot let those filthy meatbags kill you.

She glared at HK, "Leave me alone, HK!" Her hand raised with the Force she Force pushed the droid into a wroshyr tree.

Systems failing master….

Akume gasped and her shoulders slumped in shame seeming to feel regret at what she had done to her own droid.

Bastila looked on in horror. "Phoenix…snap out of it. This isn't time to mourn the death of a Mandalorian."

"Damn it all...why couldn't I have prevented this?"

Akume's dark eyes took on a look of fury. "Damn Mandalorian honor! What good is it if it only ends in death?"

She suddenly lashed out at the other Mandalorians. Her lightsaber pounding away at the Mandalorian armor. It took many slashes for the armor to give way to her lightsaber and the armor eventually gave way and weakened. I watched Akume's frustration as she hacked away at her opponents.

Carth's eyes went wide at Akume's fury. It didn't surprise me one bit, Akume was a temperamental person. She always seemed to react with emotion. She really wasn't that great a Jedi at self-control. She had been a Dark Jedi after all, according to Bastila. Her emotional prowess made her more Mandalorian in that regard. I joined in and fired my blaster rifle into the rest of these damn cowards.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Phoenix was a puzzle indeed. She seemed to exist between light and dark. How did she manage it? How could she sway between the emotional storm of a Dark Jedi and almost come close to falling to her passions? yet she was able to go back to that narrow slender edge of the light. Her emotional driven tirade was based on the fact that she wanted to do the right thing. It seemed to be a narrow balance. I doubt…Phoe...Revan even realized it. Did Phoenix draw her power in the Force from both sides? Did the Force seem to flow for her in special way that other Jedi could not? Phoenix…Revan was unique. I wished…I wanted to understand what sort of relationship Phoenix…err Revan had with the Force. It baffled me. It seemed a mystery that only the shell of Revan held. Sadly, Revan would be unable to yield up those secrets to me. It was hard enough trying to get her to yield up the secrets of the Star Forge; let alone the secrets of how Revan could now at this present moment wield, the Force in a unique combination of emotion filled passion. yet at the precise moment come back to a focus center of control. How could she do that? I wanted that secret. Was it somehow hidden in her lost memories? I wanted it. I needed it. How could I find it?

I joined Phoenix and Jolee as they proceeded to fight and slash away at the Mandalorians. Their armor was apparently difficult for a lightsaber to cut into. It must have been a combination of Mandalorian iron and perhaps cortoris ore. I glared at Canderous. This was all his fault. We wouldn't have been fighting these damn Mandalorians if it hadn't been his stubborn notion of pride and honor. He then in a perverse way had dragged Phoenix into it. He sought to evade my whole lie about Revan's past. I had to admit begrudgingly that his adopting Phoenix into the Mandalorian clans and giving her the name Akume was a very clever way to outwit me. I had been angry and then annoyed at how Canderous had managed to adopt her, and then end up giving her the very name that I said was Phoenix's real name. Yet in the end, no real damage had been done. Phoenix still had no idea she was Revan and Canderous believed that he had only restored a name that was still a lie. The deception of who Phoenix was still was intact no matter what Canderous had done.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Seriously, Bastila needed to stay out of my plans with Phoenix. I suspected that Bastila's animosity between me and Phoenix getting married was Jedi weren't supposed to fall in love nor were they supposed to get married. Well, Bastila could just frack herself. Phoenix and I were going to get married and nothing was going to stop us.

I also didn't know what to make of Canderous' adoption of Phoenix. He seemed adamant in calling her Akume of Clan Ordo. Adoption into Mandalorian clans seemed to be a very common practice, and it was well known during the Mandalorian Wars that many captives ended up either as slaves or adopted into the clans. In many instances, being adopted into the Mandalorian clans was a lot better than being a slave. However, Phoenix was hardly a captive, nor was she a slave. I think I vaguely remembered her telling me or I had overheard her talking to the others on the Hawk that she had been offered adoption by the Mandalorians in the past when she was a smuggler. She had refused. Refusing adoption wasn't smart, most captives that did ended up dead. Inferring from what I had known about captives during the war, Phoenix probably had been a captive of the Mandalorians. I could understand if Phoenix didn't really want to talk about it all that much. The Republic did everything it could for the freed captives and slaves of the Mandalorians. There was still a lot about Phoenix's past that still seemed a mystery.

Then there was the name that Canderous had given her with her adoption. He said it was the name of a Jedi that had been under Revan. Did Canderous end up killing this Jedi during the war? Who was this Akume? Apparently, this Jedi had impressed Canderous enough for him to confer the name to Phoenix. I had been fairly quiet when Canderous asked Phoenix to help him with his challenge. I couldn't fault the guy, but I looked a bit jealous when Canderous put an arm around Phoenix. I couldn't help it. He still worshiped the damn ground she walked on and the adoption was only extended to her and I was going to be her husband. Part of me couldn't help but think this was very, very, convenient. Yet, it all made sense when Canderous' Mandalorian buddy Jagi wouldn't allow any of us to help him during that honor duel except Phoenix because he had adopted her.

Phoenix did all she could to try and prevent bloodshed but I flinched as Jagi suddenly took a knife and slit his throat open and all hell broke loose.

My heart ached as Phoenix cried out in agony about failing to save Jagi. I had no love for Mandalorians but Phoenix suddenly lashed out in frustration that she couldn't prevent Jagi from killing himself. The Mandalorians with Jagi suddenly broke out in combat just for the sake of getting into combat. I cringed as Phoenix even turned on HK and with the Force slammed him into a tree causing the assassin droid to short circuit and deactivate. I fired my blasters as Jolee did his best to console Phoenix and helped her regain her emotional balance. The combat ended as we ended up killing all of the Mandalorians and Phoenix sunk into a heap afterward. She looked sick at heart.

Canderous shook his head. "It was his right, Akume."

She shook her head. "Damn you, Canderous. Are you that blind?"

He snarled at her, "There is no greater honor for a Mandalorian than to prove their honor with their death."

"And I say you're a bunch of fracked up idiots." She suddenly glared at Canderous. "The clans are scattered, they are dying. You are blind if you don't see that. You talk about the greatness of being a warrior, the greatness of the Mandalorians and all I see is a broken, fragmented people. How can you talk about a future when all you seem committed to is death? It is a sickness…"She then shook her head and sighed."I will never accept that part of Mandalorian culture, Canderous. I won't. It's defeatism at it's worse, brought on by the fact that Revan took Mandalore's mask. You all have lost your way."

Canderous looked at Phoenix and sighed, a deep sadness reflected on his face. Phoenix's words apparently making Canderous reflect, he gave a long sigh. "This thing with Jagi... I... I don't know. Give me some time and I'll be able to sort this out on my own."

Phoenix nodded. "I understand, my father, my friend, my companion. I am weary and tired, your...our people and their fate fill me with sadness. Let's get out of here."

Bastila nodded and picked up the Mandalorian helm that marked Jagi as the leader. "Here Phoenix, you promised Grrwahrr this helm."

She handed it to Phoenix, and Phoenix shook her head as she took it and gave it to Canderous. "Cand...father...do what you wish with this. If you wish to keep it, I completely understand."

Canderous sighed. "Jagi is dead, Phoenix Akume. Let this memory fade and let him be remembered as the warrior I remembered during the war."

He offered the helmet back to Phoenix and she nodded. "As you wish. Let's get that Star Map, the wookiee blade and let's leave this Force-forsaken place."

Jolee put a hand on Phoenix's shoulder. "You know, kid the worst thing you have to deal with is the memories of regret and failure. But don't let it bog you down you did everything you could...and..."

She sighed. "And sometimes, Jolee that simply doesn't feel like enough at times."

"No, it doesn't, kid. Memories won't let you forget that but you have to live with them and the pain. It makes you stronger when you can live with it."

Phoenix nodded, and Bastila shook her head in the negative. "That's not..pain and suffering…that kind of focus leads to the Dark Side."

Jolee suddenly snorted. "And what do you suggest Phoenix do, Bastila? Ignore it. Don't be absurd. Pain and suffering are part of life. You have to muddle through it and accept it and live with it, not ignore it. Honestly, what is the Order teaching its adepts these days? You go around with blinders on to the pain and suffering of others as well as the pain and suffering you feel; you become something that isn't human or perhaps is even less than human. But what do I know? I am just an old forgotten man who isn't even a Jedi."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I couldn't fault Revan's mood. She did everything she could to try and prevent Jagi and Canderous from killing each other. This reminded me of the Revan who wanted to save the Republic, and who wanted to save others from death. As much as there was a hint of darkness within Revan's soul, there was still a touch of the woman who wanted to save others. Perhaps it had stretched her too thin. Perhaps she ached so much in wanting to do the right thing for so many; she turned to the Dark in her desire to save as many as she could. I knew as anything that for one life saved, someone else ended up dying. That would be enough to drive anyone mad, perhaps it had driven Revan mad and drove her to the Dark Side.

Unfortunately, Mandalorian honor was a confusing thing and It was something Phoenix couldn't have counted on. I put a hand on her shoulder. "Kid, you can't save everyone. For one thing, not everyone wants to be saved."

She looked at me. "Damn it, old man what good is it being a Jedi, if I couldn't convince someone not to kill themselves?"

I rolled my eyes. "You think I don't know what it's like not being able to help, to feel helpless and unable to do something for someone."

Oh, I knew, more than Revan realized. I felt powerless at my own wife's turning to the Darkside. I wanted to save her. I failed. I looked deeply at Revan. Could I save her? Did Revan even want to be saved? It was a question that deserved my attention. Time would tell if Revan could honestly be saved from her own darkness.

She took a deep cleansing breath. Her emotional calm was restored. I patted her on the arm. "You're a fine lass, Phoenix. Yea, you're a bit rough around the edges, but who isn't. I am not here to judge you on your actions. You do what you have to do, and I'll try and help you if I can."

She gave me a smile and said, "Thanks Jolee...I...I owe you one."

* * *

A/N: And so ends the fate of Jagi. On to Bacca's blade and the Star Map. Comments are welcomed and thoughts are appreciated. Writing about Jagi was actually a bit hard. I muddled with the fact of trying to save him but decided in the end, to stick with the more traditional storyline that has him killing himself for honor's sake plus the repercussions that Phoenix/Revan and Canderous go through on that.

Yea, Canderous in his own way is trying to get Revan to reclaim her past and her memory. Poor guy is in for a major shock when he finds out "Akume" isn't Akume.


	67. 66:Kashyyyk: The Fault Not in the Stars

**Chapter 66: Kashyyyk: The Fault *Not* in the Stars**

 **~HK-47~**

Systems coming online…

My systems suddenly were overwhelmed by a great deal of sensory and memory output.

Query: Master what have you done? You have restored part of my memory when you pushed me.

My master looked a bit sheepish. "Err…yea that wasn't really my intent, HK. Believe me. I was...well...I guess you could say I let my...emotions get the better of me." She sighed."I am sorry HK."

Commentary: Oh Master, I am so disappointed in you right now. No, don't look at me. I would not expect you to be a proper master if you did not punish me for not obeying your commands.

My master shook her head. "Just when I think I understand you, HK. You prove that you are really a lot more demented than I even realized. You want me to punish you?"

Statement: I would not be a proper droid if you didn't take out your pent-up aggression on me. Most masters would...if you remember the last master, I told you about."

She shook her head. "Yea and you killed him…maybe not directly but...anyway...I've got you functional, so to speak. Can you move?"

Self-diagnostic activated…

My systems seemed to be functioning, in fact, better than normal since my master's unintentional push into the tree ended up restoring not only some more of my deleted memories but a few combat based programs that were associated with those memories.

Statement: Oh yes, master, I am not done for if you were inquiring about my functionality.

My master frowned. "Done for...what kind of talk is that? Seriously, if any droid of mine ended up talking like that, I'd reprogram them on the spot."

Affirmation: As you wish, master I will remove the offending term from my programming.

Statement: If you must know, master your unintentional tirade restored some additional programs that were inaccessible before. Perhaps your use of the Force was indeed beneficial to me.

My master looked a bit incredulous. "Ehh...I am not so sure I'd call it beneficial...I'd more likely call it a serendipitous outcome. Anyway, HK let's get moving."

Query: Did you also say we have a creature we must kill?

My master nodded. "I did."

Statement: Wonderful, something I can finally slaughter. You make my existence so difficult, master. You won't let me consider killing anyone new you have taken with you.

My master suddenly laughed. "You are indeed a puzzle, HK."

Commentary: Yes, master, as are you. One planet you and I slaughter Sand People and the next...at any rate, I only act as you instruct me...even if that means being...

I gulped.

...non-violent.

She gave a long sigh at my mention of slaughtering the Sand People and her features darkened as if she seemed displeased at my mention of that glorious mass slaughter.

"Stay as non-violent as you can, HK and that's a command."

I gave a weary sigh of resignation.

Statement: As you wish, master. Signing off…

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

"Come on…let's get going."

The group all nodded and we continued our journey into the depths of Kashyyyk. I was getting really tired of this place. Kilometer after kilometer of trees. I snorted to myself. Damn Revan had to be right about me all those years back. She cursed me for staying on this world and wished me unhappiness. Heh, I was tired of this place. Took me quite some time to not be happy here any longer but turned out Revan's curse was right. The trees thinned out and I saw the glow of the machinery that Revan found during her last visit. She let out a low whistle.

"Wow...this thing is big...it's almost as big as the trees themselves."

I nodded. "It's probably just as old as the trees, maybe older."

She looked at the machinery and in front of her on a platform was a strange holographic image of an amphibious being. She cocked her head curiously at it.

"Umm...hello…" She stated to the thing.

I chuckled lightly to myself. She seemed rather intimidated by it. I wasn't expecting Revan to be intimidated by the thing.

Bastila's presence around Revan felt like a greedy self-absorbed kid wanting to latch on to whatever happened. No wonder Revan was beginning to detest her. It was obvious even to me with the Force that Bastila's intentions with Revan shone in such a demonstrative manner; even Revan with her memory issues could sense that something was up.

The holo-image responded to Revan's voice.

"Life forms detected. Determining parameters. Initiating neural recognition."

I wondered if the thing would recognize Revan or not? Her whole memory and presence was off. Frankly, I had my doubts she could access the machine.

I sighed. "Yes, there's the thing. Obstinate machine. I've no doubt it holds what you seek, but good luck getting it operational."

"Primary neural recognition complete. Preliminary match found."

So there was enough of Revan's mind left that it recognized her. I was completely shocked and voiced it, "Match found? What the... it always muttered something about "rejected patterns" for me."

"Begin socialized interface."

The amphibian's holo-image suddenly shifted and there before us in mask, robes, and cape appeared a holo-image of Revan.

Hmm…this had to be interesting. I wondered how Revan would react dealing with a mirror image of herself.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

The voice was hidden by a voder. "Ahh little Jedi, you have found me once again."

I looked a bit annoyed and glared at the holo-image. "Go away, Revan. And what do you mean by again?"

The holo-image laughed. "Oh surely you jest, you did see me on Tatooine. You must want the Star Map and Star Forge badly, little Jedi. The question is...how badly do you want it? Would you kill for it?"

My eyes narrowed but I didn't answer.

"Oh come now…a goal so highly desired and you won't kill for it? You managed to kill the sarlacc on Tatooine."

I frowned, "How do you know about that?"

Revan laughed. "I hear and know what happens on Kashyyyk and a good deal beyond."

I shivered, how connected was Revan to this computer and to the holocron on Tatooine? Was she also connected to the Star Maps on Manaan and Korriban? This might explain a lot on how Revan was able to possess me. Revan had a mental link on all these planets and I had been on Tatooine, perhaps even close to the very cave that Revan had her damn holocron in.

I glared at her. "You're dead, Malak killed you!"

Revan folded up her arms and said firmly. "There is no death…there is only the Force. "

Uhh…yea…that definitely explained my troubles. Revan was unable to embrace her own death and she possessed me. Most Sith were unable to embrace the simple fact that death was part of the Force. Instead, they used the Force to extend their life unnaturally.

 _Yes, Phoenix...there are Sith that would sacrifice others to keep their own life._

Yea, Revan like you possessing me. You need to accept that you are dead and quit haunting me.

Revan laughed. _Do not mock me, little Jedi. My possessing you is not immortality. It is a pale shade of it. And I can't accept death as you put it. I...well...I am shackled to you somehow, a most tedious burden I assure you._

Wonderful. I don't know what is worse having you grate against my mind or this damn interface of you.

Bastila suddenly glared at the holo-image. "How dare you twist the Jedi code, Sith Lord!"

Revan chuckled. "You wish to argue the Jedi code with me, puny little Jedi I have a command and understanding of the Force that not even you or your masters can fathom."

I rolled my eyes at Bastila. "Umm, Bastila…quit arguing with the holo-interface of this computer. This isn't really Revan. It's a mirror image of the Dark Lord."

The holo-image of Revan cackled. "You should listen to her, puny Jedi. I am Revan but I am not Revan. I...well Revan merely programmed this computer and holocrons with a scan of my….well Revan's mind and memories."

Bastila sighed. "You're right, Phoenix. I am sorry. It's just I dislike this interface...it….well it responds too much like the real Revan."

I nodded. "Yea...well, I am not exactly enamored with it either."

I turned to the interface. "Would I kill for the Star Map?" I sighed. "To rid the galaxy of the threat of Malak and the Sith. I…" I paused."I would."

The holo interface nodded. "An honest answer. Yet…I am not convinced of your devotion to that answer. You have been given no challenge, no risks. Just an answer that you would kill for the map. So…tell me…Phoenix, you are the general of an army. You leave your commanders, Bastila Shan and Carth Onasi in charge of two segments of that army, both of them are assigned to two cities. An enemy threatens to attack both of these cities and you find out that these armies will attack them in ten days. The pending attack will leave the main force and headquarters of the enemy vulnerable to attack. What do you do with this information?

Jolee responded, "This machine wants a very specific answer, kid. Be careful how you answer."

Carth looked at me, concern etched on his features. I looked at Bastila, and she too gazed at me with the same worry on her face.

The interface of Revan responded, "Well…what is your answer?"

I glared angrily, I disliked this damn interface of Revan. It wanted me to basically surrender my lover and friends to death. I might not like Bastila but she didn't deserve death, nor did Carth. I knew the answer, though.

I sighed. "I attack the vulnerable enemy while the attack in the cities takes place. I do nothing to the cities and allow the enemy's attack to go forward sacrificing my closest commanders and their forces to their fate."

Revan nodded. "You wisely ignored sentiment in your decision, Phoenix. War requires sacrifice. If you had allowed the two cities to know the information, you have and they were allowed to prepare for the attack. The enemy would have been alerted to what you knew, and your attack would have been thwarted. Your answer is deemed correct. Now I have another question…"

I lashed out at the machine. "How dare you pit my feelings against my friends and allies and sacrifice them to save others. I will tear this damn machine apart to get to the Star Map. Your questions are irrelevant and you are irrelevant."

The holo-interface of Revan chuckled. "Your response is…most interesting. Yet it doesn't prove you are willing to truly kill or sacrifice yourself for the Star Map, you admitted a weakness to me that I coerced you to such an answer. I will not give you the Star Map! Begone!"

I glared at the machine. "Damn it, give me the map!"

I opened myself to the Force and ignited my lightsaber. I tried to cut into the computer but a feedback loop went through the computer and shorted out my lightsaber. Alarms blared and two old antiquated looking battle-ready droids came lumbering forward, similar to the ones we had fought on Dantooine.

The holo-interface intoned sounding now more like a computer than Revan, "The current operation of this installation is defense. You have been deemed unsuitable as a recipient of the Star Map. You will be destroyed."

The droids fired some sort of beam at me, and my body froze I couldn't move. Bastila ignited her saber blades and rushed to protect me. She sliced the droids and shorted them out. More droids came pouring out of the facility. "Phoenix….you shouldn't have threatened that computer like that. Now we will never get the Star Map."

Jolee ignited his blade and rushed to protect me as well. Meanwhile, HK, Carth, and Canderous provided backup fire with their blasters.

"Look Bastila…that machine...Revan...or whatever Revan programmed it for wanted me to pit my innermost emotions and feelings against all that I believe and hold dear. I am not playing any sort of mind game, and you shouldn't force me. I will tear up that damn machine to get to the map. Period!"

I finally broke free from whatever neural beam that had frozen me and charged after the droids. I would destroy these damn droids and then I'd take apart this machine even If I had to rip out the guts of the machine with the Force itself.

I sliced and hacked away. My teeth clenched together and I slammed another droid into one of the trees. The droids stopped coming out of the installation and the interface of Revan spoke. "I am satisfied with your response to the defenses of this installation. You have proven that you will do whatever is necessary to obtain the Star Map. Neural scans of your mind have proven that under distress your true primary motivation is shown."

Carth suddenly interjected, "And what primary motivation is that?"

I sighed, I had a feeling I wasn't going to like the answer the machine was going to give.

The interface responded. "Phoenix Star will kill to procure her objectives, she will sacrifice her principles to obtain the desired result she needs. The Star Map is yours. This interface will now shut down. You have what you need, little Jedi. You will soon know the correct path you need to follow."

Carth looked at me his face screwed up in a furious look. Frack, apparently he didn't like the answer the damn interface gave regarding me either.

I folded up my arms and looked angrily at the holo-interface of Revan. She just stood now in standby mode glaring at me. I felt like I had been duped by the damn machinery or had I been duped by Revan? I wasn't entirely sure. Plus not only that, I was pretty sure I had lost Carth's respect and devotion because the damn machine had scanned my mind and said my true motivation was motivated by a very dark undertow.

The Star Map opened up and I watched as Bastila downloaded the Star Map's information. She didn't seem to care, at least not at the moment about what the machine had said about me. She was more concerned about the mission overall. I raised an eyebrow, of course; she was bonded to me, She could probably sense the same thing that the machine was able to scan out of my fracking mind. I had given her what she fracking wanted, the fracking Star Map. I remembered, what Master Kreia had said about her, She was using me for some sort of agenda. However, that wasn't saying much as Kreia admitted she had an agenda as well.

Jolee looked at me. "This installation and the Star Map is an artifact of Dark Side power, kid. You gave that machine what it wanted, a very dark undercurrent of yourself. There is something very dark about you. Yet...I am not going to judge you. The masters were always a bit stodgy about the Force."

Carth glared at Jolee. "Damn it, Jolee, you're going to justify Phoenix's neural scans by a Dark Side artifact programmed by Revan? You should correct her on her actions not condone it. What kind of woman are you, Phoenix? You'll kill whoever you wish to gain your objectives and sacrifice your principles. That machine was able to scan your mind and get that from you. That scares me, Phoenix. "

I glared at Carth, "What the frack do you want from me, Republic? I can't help what that damn machine scanned and determined from my brain. I had to get the Star Map, that's our mission. It needed evidence that I would do what it wanted. Besides, what would you do to get to Admiral Saul Karath? Would you sacrifice me? Would you kill people that got in your way? Hmm?"

"That's different, Phoenix."

"No…it's not. And you didn't answer me, Carth. What would you do to the man who destroyed your home, killed your wife and had your son taken as a Sith acolyte?"

Carth paused. "Damn it, Phoenix. You know how I feel about that!"

"Then don't judge me, Republic."

I looked at HK, "Come with me HK, let's find that beast with the Blade of Bacca."

HK responded. Statement: Yes, master.

The droid stormed off with me.

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I watched as Carth and Revan fought with each other. Ahh, a lover's spat. I sighed, I remembered those. If only my memories of those weren't so painful. Phoenix…err Revan stormed off apparently angry at Carth for what she saw as Carth's hypocrisy.

I shook my head and Carth looked at me. "How can you defend her, Jolee? For all I know, Phoenix could murder us all in our sleep just to gain an objective."

I snorted. "Don't be absurd, kid. If she wanted to do that, you'd already be dead. Besides as I told you before, she loves you. I can't understand why though? You smell like an unwashed uller. I've smelled wookiees that smell better than you, plus you look as hairy as a wookiee. When was the last time you actually shaved or took a bath in a fresher? Or are you going for the rugged hermit look? It might look good for me but why Phoenix would find that even remotely attractive is beyond me."

Carth snorted. "How can you joke, old man? We're talking about something a neural scan picked up from her."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Are you that thick? She has a mission to defeat Malak. She was...is _very_ upset that that damn machine tried to pit an objective against those she loves and cares for. Revan programmed that damn thing to pick up dark intentions from a user. It needed her to act like that. It took a show of force and an aggressive act from her for the damn thing to even give her the Star Map in the first place. It doesn't seem to bother Bastila that much. Maybe because she knows that Phoenix has to do what she has to do to get the Star Map."

Carth raised an eye at the mention that Bastila didn't seem half as upset as she should be. Considering what the neural scan had picked up on Phoenix, Carth turned towards Bastila. "Bastila are you going to justify Phoenix's actions and what the machine said about her?"

Bastila sighed. "Am I concerned about Phoenix? Of course, I am, Carth. However, there isn't much I can do. Phoenix does as she wishes. I have no control over her actions. Perhaps at one point in time, I was able to counsel her towards the proper path of a Jedi, but I can't anymore. She..."Bastila paused."well, you see how she was with me earlier, Carth. There is nothing I can say to her without her basically telling me to 'go frack myself'. I am sorry, Carth I truly wish there was more that I could do."

Carth then asked, "What happened between you two, Bastila? You use to...well...you were amicable back on Taris, and on Dantooine and now….it seems like she can't stand your guts."

Bastila let out a deep forlorn sigh. "We had a disagreement, Carth. It hurts to say, that we..."She sighed."In many respects, you are part of that disagreement. We don't see eye to eye regarding the Order and attachments."

I snorted. "Love doesn't lead to the dark side. Passion can lead to rage and fear, and can be controlled... but passion is not the same thing as love. Controlling your passions while being in love... that's what they should teach you to beware. But love, itself, will save you... not condemn you."

Bastila shook her head, apparently, she disagreed with me. She then stated, "Enough talk...we need to go after Phoenix before she hurts herself. She has a habit of running off and taking on more than she can handle. Come on…Cander..."

I looked for the Mandalorian but apparently, he had decided to go with Revan and HK. I chuckled. "She's not exactly helpless, Bastila. It seems that Canderous followed after her."

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

Run...we had been running from Czerka. Apparently after our spat with Chuundar. He attempted to hand us over to Czerka. I used the Force and managed to freeze the Czerka guards in place. Mission and Jordo began to run with me. I tried to get Zaalbar and his intended Wrrl to come, but Zaalbar would not move. He said his honor demanded he stay with his brother. He couldn't run off or his dishonor as a Madclaw would be worse. I shook my head, his brother had little to no honor. I worried that Chuundar might kill his own brother. However, it seemed as though Chuundar thought a lot about appearances. He might spare, Zaalbar and try to twist him to his way of thinking.

Jordo looked at me with a slight angry glare. "I told you I had a bad feeling about this. Why don't people ever listen when someone says they have a bad feeling about things?"

Mission was running with us. "Oh just hush, chuba face. Juhani did her best. How was she to know Chuundar was going to be a dishonorable fink?"

I sighed. "No, Mission, Jordo is right. Zaalbar said his brother had sold his people out to Czerka I should have accounted for this possibility."

The Force stasis field wasn't going to last forever. Czerka would be coming for us. I sighed. "Get to the Hawk, Jordo, Mission. Tell Freyyr we are going to have to fight against Czerka. The wookiees that are with him are going to have to fend off a possible attack. You will have to take over the docking ring. Take it over and hold it. You, Jordo and the wookiees on the Hawk will have to drive Czerka to Rwookrrorro where Chuundar is."

Mission started to whine. " You make it sound like you're not accompanying us, Juhani. You have to come with us, help us. You're the only Jedi that can...well one Jedi can."She paused."You could tip everything for us."

I shook my head. "I cannot, Mission. Someone has to go into the Shadowlands and tell Phoenix and the others what has happened. They must be prepared to fight and someone must let them know what's going on. I am sorry, Mission."

"Okay Juhani, have it your way. I still think you should stay and rally the wookiees against Czerka."

I sighed and shook my head. "I don't have that type of ability, Mission. I don't..."

Mission cut me off. "Don't sell yourself short, Juhani. You are very capable of helping to rally others. You managed to help the wookiees that were stuck on Tatooine."

I shook my head. "Help, yes…but rally others to victory, no. Only Phoenix and…" I paused a moment. It began to dawn on me that it wasn't just Phoenix who had strength as a leader but also Bastila. Well, Bastila wasn't really a leader per say but she could literally rally and support others to victory through the Force. "We need Bastila, Mission. The Force is with Bastila through her battle meditation."

Mission's eyes went wide. "You mean Bastila plus the wookiees against Czerka we actually have a chance in holding the docking ring."

I nodded. Mission then smiled. "Then I guess you're going to have to find them, Juhani. May the Force be...shining on you."

I laughed. "It's May the Force be with you, Mission."

"Ehh...close enough."

I shook my head. "Good luck Mission and May the Force be with you as well."

She nodded, and I took a gigantic Force propelled leap off the walkway and dug my claws into one of the gigantic trees. I gulped as I looked down. My heart pounded in my chest. What had I gotten myself into? I froze and my fur stood on end.

No, I could not let my fear drive me, Mission and the others were counting on me. I breathed and slowly began to start my arduous descending climb into the Shadowlands.

* * *

A/N: And here is a good place to stop. Okay…I added one more closing sentence to my chapter with Juhani and Chuundar to make the POV with her in this chapter make sense. It took me quite some time to write this chapter because I had a family crisis plus the wonderful American holiday of Thanksgiving and... my muse pretty much crashed for about a week. I didn't feel like writing and the only POV I could come up with was HK's. I still had a rough idea of what I wanted in this chapter. So it was in my brain...just had to come up with the motivation to write it down. Happy Holidays…And may The Force be with You. And not too much longer till The Last Jedi.


	68. 67:Kashyyyk:The Creature of the DarkSide

**Chapter 67: Kashyyyk: The Creature of the Dark Side**

 **~Phoenix~**

"Hey Akume…wait up!"

I turned to find Canderous trailing me. I paused. The name Akume grated on my nerves just as badly as Revan's nebulous voice grated on me.

I turned towards Canderous. "Cand..."

He glared at me and I sighed. "Fine...father...I don't think I'll ever get used to calling you that, to be honest. I mean I appreciate the honor and all...but I will never be a true Mandalorian."

He snorted. "It's about time you realize that you will never be a proper Jedi. So don't try it, I know you want to be a Jedi. But look that machine back there proves one thing, Akume. You're not a proper Jedi and I don't think you ever will be. Does it honestly kriffing matter what you are or what you're not? Even that old man, we found, he's not a Jedi but that doesn't stop him from using the Force. But that answer you gave that machine back there about sacrificing Bastila and Carth...that's pure Mandalorian thinking. You sacrificed people to gain your objective, that's the action of a warrior. It's something to be proud of not ashamed of, Akume."

I snorted. "Yea…well I am not proud of it. Yet, I suppose in the end if that scenario was true, I'd follow it. I know in the end like you did on Althir that victory in a cause that you believe in is…"I paused and I sighed."I don't want to talk about it…father because saying the words only pains me and the fact that once after an action like that….well it gets easier and easier justifying it. I could achieve victory but what good is it if you end up sacrificing your soul in the process? It eats you up."

Canderous sighed, his features turned a bit reflective. "I think I know…what you're talking about but…." He then scowled."Bah…such thoughts are unbecoming of a warrior."

I tried to smile but only a thin line managed to appear on my lips. "Cand…father, the Jedi...the woman named Akume…did you kill her?"

Canderous features hardened. "No, The Jedi did."

I looked incredulous. "What do you mean? The Jedi don't kill people."

Canderous snorted. "Don't be absurd…Phoenix. They went after Revan."

"Yea, but Malak killed Revan, not the Jedi."

"But what if...Malak hadn't killed him. Revan wouldn't have surrendered to the Jedi and they would have been forced to kill him. Don't let the Jedi's pacifism blind you."

HK suddenly interjected, Statement: The Mandalorian meatbag makes a good point, master. The Jedi are pseudo-pacifists. They still kill enemies even if they dislike it. I like you as a master, master because you are willing to kill even though you dislike it.

I groaned. "Great…I have got a droid that likes me because I can kill. I suppose you approved of what I did back there against the Star Map computer."

Commentary: Oh Yes, Master. That was a very clever assessment. Your brain is very un-meatbag-like.

I sighed and shook my head. Meanwhile, Canderous grinned at me. I then said, "If you didn't kill Akume and you're claiming the Jedi killed her…how?"

He looked at me, his eyes firm and intense. "They fracked her mind. They killed the person who she was by putting in someone she wasn't and all because they supposedly don't kill people."

I frowned. "So you're saying she is still alive but isn't. And I thought Jedi couldn't be any more convoluted, so where the frack is this woman?"

He looked at me and said nothing. "Uhh…Canderous..."

He held my hand. "You are Akume…Phoenix. Don't you realize that?"

I snorted, and I shook my hand from his grasp. "You've gone fracking nuts, Candy. I know who I am, I am Phoenix Star. "

What had brought this up? I looked at Canderous, what made him think I was some Jedi named Akume?

He sighed and looked at me. "You only think that because of what the Jedi did to you."

My jaw dropped, was it even possible for the Jedi to mess with a person's mind? Although I did remember Carth had said that the Force could do terrible things to a person's mind. Yet, that seemed totally out of character for them. What reason would they even think of doing something like that?

"Look, Candy… let's say for a moment that you're right that the Jedi did mess with my head. What good reason would the Jedi have, to commit to such a thing?"

"To gain knowledge, Akume. That is a Jedi mantra, in case you have forgotten."

"Frack, don't call me that. I am Phoenix Star. And knowledge, what knowledge?"

He sighed. "Akume was under Revan. They needed you to help them...willingly. Do you honestly think a Dark Jedi would willingly give up Revan's secrets?"

"Uh no, probably not. But I am telling you, Candy, I am not Akume. I know myself pretty damn well and I am not her."

He sighed. "How do you know that?"

I paused and took a deep breath and applied the Force to the revelation that Canderous gave me. The truth could be sensed and through my feelings, I could discern it. Canderous' words did not ring with any certainty, and the Force could help me know the truth from most sentients. "Because the Force helps me discern truth, Canderous and what you tell me doesn't feel right. I know you believe I am her, but I am not. Just because you believe this doesn't make it the truth. I am Phoenix Star, Canderous. You must see this, but I'll still call you father if it makes you feel any better."

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I finally had the moment to be alone with Akume and reveal what I knew, and she denied it. What made it worse was that she claimed the Force was able to help her discern that my statement wasn't true. Fracking kriffing hell, she would trust the Force after it was the Force and the Jedi that fracked her brain in the first place.

I glared at her angrily. "I don't care what you say…you are Akume. Akume Dreamsong."

She sighed. "Canderous…father….look I am not Akume. Stop being a stubborn Mandalorian."

"I am stubborn! I am not the one in denial."

She suddenly laughed. "Look, can't we get a move on! We have a beast to take care of...and I am not this Akume you speak of."

I shook my head. "But you must have some sort of conflict within your mind between what you were and who you are now?"

She paused and froze as if something I had said had finally gotten through to her and she said adamantly, "I am Phoenix Star, Canderous. I was born on Deralia, my family….my family was killed by Mandalorians, Canderous. I remember seeing their dead bodies. I love them…how….how can you say all that is a lie?"

She started crying and I froze. Frack, what had I done? I had pushed too hard on her. I hugged her, hugged her like a father and I stroked her hair gingerly. She needed someone to help her, someone to make her strong. "I am sorry, Phoenix. I...am sorry. I didn't mean to…I am your father now, Phoenix. I can't make up what my people did to you…"

I couldn't make up what the fracking Jedi had done to her either. She was so…brainwashed by the Jedi. I felt like crying as well. I couldn't, though. It was unbecoming of a warrior of the Mandalorians to show such emotion like this. Yet, I felt hollow inside. I sighed, maybe that fracking Jedi princess was right. Akume was falling apart before my eyes.

I heard a cough and Carth glared at me. "Stay away from her, Canderous."

"Carth, this isn't what you think it is. Maybe if you accepted Phoenix for whom and what she is, she wouldn't need my support."

Carth snorted. "I see her in your arms..."

Phoenix spoke, "Don't be daft, Republic. Canderous isn't my type. He adopted me and I am his daughter."

Carth glared. "I see how it is. Were you…his lover too?!"

Phoenix stepped out of my arms. "Fracking hell...why do I even bother? You do realize he could have adopted me as his wife, but he didn't. Maybe because he respects you more than you realize, Republic!"

I nodded. "You should listen to her, Carth. She is a cunning and skilled warrior and would make a good wife to you. Yet, you always seem to doubt her, always seem to question her motives. What is wrong with you?"

I saw Bastila and Jolee enter as well and I smiled. Finally, I had witnesses before me. "As the father to Akume Ordo, also known as Phoenix Star and as my authority as her father. I forbid the marriage of Carth Onasi to Akume Phoenix Lynn Star Ordo."

Carth and Phoenix glared at me and both said at the same time. "What?!"

"You heard me; you don't deserve her, Carth. And you Akume…Phoenix or whatever name you wish to be known as you don't deserve this kriffing hut'uun. You deserve a better man than him. And if you even try getting married. I will kill you both."

I didn't want to do this but knew it was the only way I could get Carth to act like a man and maybe get Akume's memories all sorted out. What was she thinking anyway, getting married when she knew she had some sort of mental conflict going on in her head?

Phoenix and Carth both glared at me. That damn assassin droid spoke up. Cautionary: Do not threaten the master, meatbag. Lay one hand on the master and I'll splatter your organs all over the forest floor.

Phoenix glared at the droid. "HK stop it! Canderous, what the fracking hell are you doing?"

"Protecting you, kid. Someone has to do it."

Carth gave me a hard look. "I promised to protect her; she doesn't need you protecting her as well!"

I snorted."Then stop acting like a hut'uun and protect her like the man you should be and not the kriffing pathetic Republic dog you are!"

Carth suddenly slammed into me and I laughed as he began attacking me. This wasn't exactly what I wanted either but hey maybe a good old fashion fight was the only way to knock some sense into him.

"I'll teach you some respect, Mandalorian dog! Mess with Phoenix and I'll be the one who kills you!"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"Guys stop it…"

Carth was punching into Canderous with a rage and fury I hadn't seen before. Carth had Canderous down on the ground and was kicking him in the gut. The next moment, Canderous grabbed Carth by the legs and threw him down. "You want to play rough, Republic dog...alright, you asked for it!"

He kicked Carth right in the groin and Carth yelped in pain. Carth groaned got off the ground and tried to throw a punch to Canderous' face. Canderous ducked and then gave a hard punch to Carth's face. He'd have a black eye from it for sure.

I looked at Jolee, and he just stood looking at me with a grin on his face. "Jolee, this has to stop before they kill each other."

"Bah...why should I stop it? Besides, I would think you'd be honored to have two men fighting over you!"

I looked at Bastila and she sighed and said, "This is why the Jedi forbid attachments, Phoenix. Jealousy, anger, hate….all over you! Can't you see I am right?"

I glared at Bastila. She had absolutely no right to say what she was saying considering our earlier actions. I sighed. "You know what...this is ridiculous. Come on HK, let's go. I have no time for this. We have a blade to get and wookiees to save."

Carth and Canderous frowned and stopped tearing into each other and Carth looked at me as Canderous firmly had Carth in a headlock "But..."

I shook my head. "Maybe I'll consider staying if you both behave a little less like boys and a little more like...well like men."

Carth grunted at my insult and Canderous laughed. "She's got us there, Carth."

Carth sighed. "Phoenix…I am sorry. Really I am…about the Star Map…you're only doing what you must for the mission."

I laughed. "Well, you're going to have a wallop of a black eye, Republic. But I forgive you, but Canderous is right about one thing. You need to stop doubting me or questioning my motives. Have I ever given you any reason to doubt my resolve?"

Carth looked at me. "But…I thought..." He paused a moment."I guess old habits really do die hard. Just one thing, why were you and Canderous…"

I grinned a bit. "Yea, you've come a long way from when we met on Taris, Carth. As for me and Canderous, it's platonic I swear. I have a lot going on with this mission. I needed a shoulder to cry on, I would rather it be yours, Republic. I love you. You know I love you. Frack...we've...well… we shared so many private moments together, Republic. So why do you honestly think that Canderous and I? But...It's okay, I understand, you're hopelessly enamored and in love with me. Come here you lunk-head and you better be sorry or I might give you a shiner on your other eye."

"You really know how to hurt a man's feelings, Phoenix. Gah...you're right, I am hopelessly attached to you."

I sighed. "And I to you, Carth. How can you even question me on that?"

He grinned and firmly held me and kissed me on my lips.

Canderous sighed. "You're still under my prohibition; you can't get married."

I frowned. "Why the frack not?"

"You know why…Akume!"

I glared at him, damn it. He still thought I was some fracking woman named Akume.

Carth looked at me, "What's this about, Phoenix?"

"Canderous thinks…" I paused a moment. "He seems to think I have some issues I need to resolve before we can get married."

Canderous nodded. "And you do. I am sorry, Akume. You need to figure these things out before I can allow any daughter of mine to get married."

I sighed, Carth raised an eyebrow. "Care to elaborate, Phoenix."

"It has to…"

Canderous interjected. "It has to deal with the mission, Carth. Akume needs to work out her issues with this mission. I know you wanted to get married but if you still love each other then you can wait."

Carth frowned. "What sort of issues?"

Bastila quickly spoke up, "Canderous is right, Carth. We need to complete this mission first. We already have become distracted by your petty squabble with each other."

I glanced at Bastila. Damn it all, she was so petty. She was against me and Carth being in a relationship, to begin with; she was now telling lies to Canderous in order to keep me and Carth from being together. I bet Bastila still hadn't gotten over that we were no longer together. Yet, she was right to a point. I couldn't deal with Carth and Canderous beating up each other over me.

Carth looked pretty banged up and Canderous had a few bruises as well. Damn it, this was all my fault. "Let's just go...please..."

The group nodded, and we continued on our path to find where this beast was. My thoughts went back to Canderous' words.

 _"But you must have some sort of conflict within your mind between what you were and who you are now?"_

His words had made me pause and reflect over all the times I kept arguing with myself. The constant mental struggle I seemed to have within myself over everything: from how I viewed the Force, the Jedi, the Republic. It was maddening, but it couldn't be what Canderous was suggesting, could it? No, despite the weird fact that I was possessed by Revan I knew who I was. I was Phoenix Star. There was also the fact that Gavia on Tatooine knew who I was. I also had a Republic issued ID, and Carth had looked it over when we first met. Damn it...since when is it normal to question who you are?

I walked ahead of the others keeping my pace away from the others. Carth and Canderous were already pretty beat up because of me. And now, Canderous thought I was in fracking denial because I knew I wasn't a damn Dark Jedi named Akume. Thanks a lot, Bastila, you've totally ruined my friendship and adoption with Canderous.

Jolee came over. "Credit for your thoughts, Phoenix."

"Jolee...I'll be honest I think I need a not-a-Jedi Jedi on my side."

He chuckled. "So I noticed. That's why I decided to join you."

I frowned. "Am I really that interesting?"

Jolee chuckled. "Well, you're the only Jedi I've seen that can cause a fight between two guys. I haven't seen quite a stir like that since Nomi and Ulic. Poor Nomi though, she honestly tried. Sometimes you and the one you love are simply not meant to be together."

"What do you know about things like love? Last I checked Jedi don't well...they just don't believe in such things?"

"Oh, I know plenty on that subject."

"Like what, old man?"

Jolee sighed. "I don't want to talk about it. You need to work out your issues on this mission, Phoenix. Little miss-I-am-the-perfect-Jedi over there is right about that. Honestly, how did you, and she get together in the first place?"

"I honestly don't know. I sometimes think me and her are like a really bad joke that the Force decided to throw together."

Jolee laughed. "Well, kid...the Force can be temperamental. I can tell you that. Yet, the main reason why I am with you is that when I saw the destiny that you have, Phoenix. I couldn't help but be intrigued."

"Well, what do you see from me, Jolee?"

"I can see that you have a destiny before you... but the details are far from clear. Everything about you that I can see is odd. Slightly off, as if my eyes are trying to trick me. Something...well I've said it before...but something is very dark about you. But... bah! I'm sure you don't need to hear my ruminations. You've probably got enough nosy Jedi offering you one opinion after another to make you sick."

"And?"

Jolee sighed. "Your future will come of its own accord, Phoenix. Trust me. Sometimes navel-gazing at it doesn't get you anywhere. Anyway, let's get back to what we are doing. Say...that looks like a sacrificial mound over there. You know, did I ever tell you the wookiees thought I was some sort of benevolent forest god?"

"No."

"Well, they did. I thought they were just being friendly neighbors leaving me fruit and such. Now I appreciate the wookiees and their customs and all but...I had to set the record straight, and it took a few bumps and bruises to prove it."

I laughed and went over to the mound and read the ancient script on a rock. "It says it needs blood, it says the beast won't come without a sacrifice."

The whole sacrifice thing seemed a bit odd to me because since when did wookiees believe in sacrificing animal life?

 _It's a matter of balance, Phoenix. The nature of life, even of the Force itself needs that life must be given to preserve another. If the beast is unfed, it would storm through the Shadowlands craving the blood of many sentients to sate its hunger._

Revan since when are you an expert on balance?

She laughed, _I am an expert on many things, Phoenix._

I...well… I thought on Revan's words. She was right, though. There was a matter of balance here much more complex than anything.

HK responded. Statement: Master, allow me to kill one of your useless meatbag allies so we have a sacrifice for the beast.

I coughed, damn that droid, it was so damn homicidal. It had a one tract behavior core. It made me cringe every damn time.

"No, HK."

The droid seemed to let out a plaintive whine. Resignation: As you wish, master.

Jolee chuckled. "Quite a murderous droid you've got there. You know Carth worries that you'll kill everyone in their sleep. I think he has more to worry from that damn droid then he does from you."

I snorted, "You know, he worried about that earlier as well. I swear there is no pleasing that man."

"He's just concern about your erratic nature, Phoenix. You are very wild and unbent... it could be due to the fact that you've come late to the Force. It's nothing to be ashamed of, you remind me a bit of Nomi, she also came late to the Force, but anyone that reminds me of Nomi can't be altogether bad."

I sighed. "Yea...but I bet Nomi didn't have to worry about falling to the Dark Side."

"She had her moments, Phoenix. When her husband was killed, she attacked with a fury and vowed she'd never use a lightsaber afterward. That's how strong her commitment to the Jedi way was. Yet, she eventually came to peace with her actions. I think you'll eventually come to peace with your actions, Phoenix. You just need to…"

I finished his sentence. "Come to terms with whom and what I am within the Force and where I am going."

Jolee nodded. "Exactly, kid. But I'll tell you a little secret, finding out whom and what you are to the Force could take you a lifetime. There are Jedi masters who struggle trying to figure out their place and even destiny in the Force."

"Great…so I might never find peace at all and if I do…I could…well, I could lose all my hair like you."

Jolee snorted. "It didn't take Nomi that long to figure things out and I don't think it will take you that long either. Stop being so pessimistic about yourself. You're a strong woman, strong in the Force. You have a powerful path ahead of you. I…well...I hope I am around to see it."

"Wonderful, I am a freak show for the old man."

Jolee shook his head. "You really have a strange sense of humor for one so young. Where in the core did you acquired such a case of dark and sometimes very gallows humor?"

I shrugged. "Just something I always had, Jolee."

"You remind me of...well...never mind. Just another Jedi I knew, a long time ago."

"Her name wasn't Akume was it?"

Jolee frowned. "No. I don't know a Jedi by that name. I've been here for over twenty years, Phoenix. It's not as if meeting Jedi is a normal event in the Shadowlands. I would know if I met a Jedi with that name."

I looked thoughtful. "You were here for twenty years; did you see or meet Revan?"

Jolee looked at me and scratched his chin. "Bah...why are you so fascinated by that woman?"

My jaw dropped. "You knew she was a woman…"

Jolee chuckled. "Of course I knew who she was, I have been here for twenty years and that Star Map was found by her first. How do you think I knew where to find it? But a powerful woman, she was and she thoroughly burned with the Force, like a fire from the heart of a sun itself. But much good a sun is, Phoenix. If a sun gets too close, it burns others. A bit like, well the bird you are named for. But she was very strong…almost as strong as…"He looked at me and then sighed."Well, kid, it does no good to talk about dead Sith Lords. She's dead, isn't she?"

"Yea, Malak killed her."

"Then the dead should stay dead, kid. Let Revan find the peace and rest she didn't get in life."

That was a strange way to end a conversation. I never thought the woman who possessed my body would want peace and rest because such things were Jedi traits, but then I wasn't fully sure I understood Revan. Sometimes she spoke like a Sith and other times she spoke like a Jedi. Maybe I should pity her more than I had, assuming she wanted my pity to begin with; but then the Jedi would say, that was something that should be considered unconditional that even if she rejected it I should still pity her. Thinking this way, a strange feeling of peace settled over me and I felt more settled than I had in a long time.

The others came, and I looked at my group. "We need an animal sacrifice to lure out the beast."

Carth and Bastila made a face, and Bastila said, "What kind of animal needs a sacrifice that…that sounds like a creature of the Dark Side."

Jolee snorted and I rolled my eyes and stated, "No, it doesn't. This is a forest. Nature requires a matter of balance. The wookiees understand that, right, Jolee?"

Jolee nodded. "You've got it, kid. The sacrifice pacifies the hunger of this creature if it wasn't given a sacrifice it would upset the balance normally found here. Without that sacrifice, the beast would turn it's hunger on others and would start going after wookiees and others in this forest."

I nodded and said to Bastila, "Even if it is a creature of the Dark Side, Bastila. You can't get rid of that aspect of the Force. It will always exist, even in nature. This place is strong in the Dark Side, but…vanquishing it doesn't get rid of it, Bastila. It still exists. It will always exist."

 _Ahh...you are learning, Phoenix._

Maybe I am, Revan. Maybe I am.

Bastila looked at me in horror, "But the Dark Side…Phoenix."

I shook my head. "Is not absolute. The Dark Side is part of this forest, Bastila. Yet, Jolee has managed to live here for a good part of his life. The wookiees seek to overcome it and have lived side by side with it. It doesn't make them evil, though."

Jolee nodded. "That they do, kid. This forest is part of many coming of age ceremonies for them. If they can conquer the darkness that exists here then they are considered a full-fledged adult. And to be considered an adult in wookiee terms is a good thing for them."

I grabbed a tach that was close by and it screamed as it squirmed in my grasp. Bastila flinched as I took a knife and slit its throat.

Jolee shook his head. "That's not enough, kid. You're going to have to kill something bigger for a creature to accept that sacrifice."

I chuckled. "I wasn't thinking of it as a sacrifice for the creature, old man. I was more thinking of it as…bait."

I threw the dead tach to the ground. "Just be patient...blood gives off a scent and attracts the hungry."

Kinrath came a few minutes later drawn to the scent of the dead tach. I chuckled. "There is always a bigger predator."

I ignited my lightsaber blades and began to fight off the pack of kinrath that swarmed around one dead tach. It seemed a bit ridiculous but that was the way that the Shadowlands were. Jolee activated his lightsaber and worked fending off the kinrath. Bastila sighed, and she also activated her blades and went to work killing off the kinrath swarm.

Meanwhile, HK, Carth, and Canderous lay down cover fire. A good pile of sacrificial animals lay in a pile near the place of sacrifice.

I laughed. "What do you think now, old man? Is this plenty of animals for a sacrifice?"

Jolee nodded. "Oh probably...probably enough for two or three creatures."

I heard a rumbling in the woods. I shivered. I felt the creature before I saw it. It came into the clearing it looked a bit like a rancor yet deformed and mutated. Bastila gasped. "Terentatek…"

"Terenta...what?" I stated.

Bastila ignited her lightsaber blades. "A creature...some believe it might even be related to rancors. But they were mutated by the Sith to attack and go after Jedi. It has a taste for the blood of Force-sensitives."

The creature growled and suddenly attacked me, drool coming from its lips…

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

Revan was asking more and more questions about...herself. I tried answering them as best as I could. Poor lass, she was absolutely muddled in the mind. I think she was so close to grasping the truth but then it was like she couldn't fathom the possibility that she was Revan. When she asked me if I had met a Jedi named Akume and Canderous had given her the name Akume. It was obvious that Canderous had told her that she was a Jedi named Akume. I doubt she believed it. Asking me this question, meant she was feeling me out on it, seeing if I would confirm what Canderous had said. At times I was so tempted to shake her by the shoulders and tell her, 'wake up, kid you are Revan.' Yet, I am not even sure she would believe me after it was apparent that he had tried something similar with her.

When I denied knowing Akume, and she asked me about Revan I thought maybe she had figured out who she was but...no…she hadn't, she always skirted so close, so very close and then it was like the concept that she might be Revan eluded her. I wasn't sure if it was denial or some sort of mental block the Jedi had given her or perhaps both.

Yet, I tried helping her at least find some semblance of peace within her poor broken mind. I did feel sorry for her. How could the Jedi do something this terrible to Revan? Was this any better than Revan being dead? I mulled that over. Some ways, she was so broken, it would have been better if Malak had killed her. Yet, there were small bits of Revan that remained such as her humor and wit.

I hoped somehow her erratic nature would settle down, and Revan would find the peace she lacked. Even the Revan I knew before her injury, peace had been something she lacked. I think it was due to her power and her desire to help others that caused Revan to lack peace within the Force itself.

Yet telling her to let Revan find the peace and rest she didn't get in life, gave her a strange sense of peace. I am not sure how long that peace would last within her but she seemed a bit calmer and her presence seemed to focus more on acceptance within herself. Hmm...perhaps somewhere deep within her subconscious mind, a part of her knew inwardly she was Revan. Maybe telling her to accept peace for Revan...err herself had been the right words after all.

Whatever the case, I had a sense of pride that Revan had developed a sort of emotional stability and then she started telling Bastila...no wait...not really telling her...scolding her over her nervous ticks over the Dark Side. I leaned against a tree and felt like laughing. She seemed to remember something or something of her broken mind seemed to drift quite unconsciously to the surface.

Old beliefs, old philosophies she held. She ended up spending many an hour talking with me, perhaps even arguing with me that she believed the Dark Side was a part of the Force that would always exist. Of course, those words would be considered a heresy to most Jedi. Where had Revan gotten such ideas? Maybe one of her masters? All those conversations she had with me as she carried on with me that the Jedi were incorrect in trying to destroy the Dark Side for balance's sake. She then also noted that Sith were just as bad because they didn't care about balance either, they only sought to eliminate the Jedi. Revan believed that balance was found neither in the Dark nor the Light but in the middle of both sides. Yep, Revan was a heretic but she didn't care nor did it seem as if she cared now.

Yet, I had to admit her ramblings did make some sense. It was interesting how she made the connection that linked nature and the Force together. She also recognized as I had that the wookiees were able to deal with the Dark Side found within the Shadowlands and be able to live in the backdrop of the Darkness in the Shadowlands.

I watched as Revan killed a tach and then lured kinrath to the sacrificial mound. We helped kill them and then the creature came. A creature that Bastila and I recognized as a terentatek. It growled and attacked going for the strongest Force user it could sense which was Revan.

Revan frowned as she tried striking the creature with her lightsaber blades but found that the terentatek's hide was thick and made it hard for her lightsabers to cut into it. Cutting into the creature with lightsabers annoyed the creature. The beast then took its claws and ripped her clothing. She gasped as poison from the creature went through her body and she fell to the ground. She was moaning and shaking violently from the poison and the creature was about to drag her away, but a quick shot from Carth's blasters prevented the creature from doing so.

"Phoenix…" Carth exclaimed and ran over to her and dragged her away from the fight.

"Stay with me, gorgeous..."

Meanwhile, the rest of us tried keeping the terentatek from going anymore after Revan. I sliced into its thick hide with my lightsabers. Damn thick mutated rancor skin, this wasn't easy at all but I had an idea how to get rid of the damn thing.

"Anyone got a thermal detonator on them?"

I saw blank stares on our little group's faces. Finally, Canderous stated,"I might, old man. I have to check what I have on me. Hold on."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Carth's voice echoed as if I was in an echo chamber. I felt the burning of fever...where was I?

My eyes closed and opened and I cringed as I saw Malak cross my field of vision. He laughed bemusedly at me. _"At last we meet again..."_

"Again?"

He laughed. _"Yes...isn't it obvious. Surely some of what you once were must have surfaced by now."_

I stood on my feet and ignited my lightsaber blades.

"Malak…"

I slashed at him, but Malak quickly jumped away from me.

I blinked again, and the image of Malak was replaced with Carth.

"Phoenix snap out of it...you're hallucinating."

I was confused I wasn't sure what was real but I fell down and stumbled.

A voice echoed. "Get her out of here, Carth. It's that damn poison."

"But what if she attacks me again, Jolee?"

My lightsaber blades floated away. "Then you won't get stabbed by a lightsaber."

I screamed as my lightsabers were taken away from me. I was helpless. "No…Malak will kill me...no..."

I scratched at Malak or was it Carth? I was confused. I couldn't take the risk. What if it was Malak? They said poison, what if Malak had injected me with poison.

Malak laughed. _"You are not…Phoenix Star…you are Akume Dreamsong!"_

I lashed out with the Force. I heard the screech of a monster and a loud thud and I heard a groan. "Damn it, Phoenix...take it easy. You darn well knocked the air out of everyone."

"I won't take it easy…Malak. It's either you or me and it's not going to be me."

"I am not Malak…Phoenix. You have to believe me! It's me...gorgeous...your hairless wookiee."

Malak wouldn't speak like that? Would he?

"Republic?"

"My...my poor little Rave...blackbird, we have to get you out of here, that terentatek poison has got you so fracked up in the head."

"No...it's a lie...you're trying to deceive me. It's all a Sith lie…I am Phoenix Star…I know I am Phoenix Star…you are only confusing me with the Force. You're not Carth…you're deceiving me!"

I scratched at Malak with my fingernails, and he said. "I am sorry, Phoenix...I hate to do this...forgive me."

My head suddenly throbbed as something hard clunked against my head. I screamed once again. "No…I can't pass out...I…can't…I don't want to die!" I once again lashed out with the Force trying to push away the threats around me.

I heard groans and grunts as I knew I had slammed Malak into the ground.

"Damn it, Phoenix it's me…Republic...Carth...can't you hear me?"

"She's so mixed up in the head, Carth. It's a wonder...well...you've got to clunk her again with your blaster."

"But I don't want to, Jolee. I already tried knocking her out once. I can't try and do it again. I love her."

"Sometimes loving someone means you have to make tough decisions. Do you now understand what Phoenix must have felt when that computer forced her to act in such a manner? It probably tore her up inside."

The object hit hard on my head once again and….my vision suddenly faded. I gave a sigh…as I surrendered to what I was sure was my own death.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

How could I doubt my love for Phoenix? I felt ashamed, more so seeing her struggle against the mind-altering poison of the terentatek. She seemed to think I was Malak. I wondered what the hell was going on in that head of hers. She kept yelling out that she was Phoenix and something about Sith lies. It was like she couldn't determine what was real and what wasn't.

Between blaster shots at that damn monster and trying to keep Phoenix from panicking and then her slamming us all, including the terentatek with the Force. Meanwhile, Jolee and Bastila fought the damn creature, but their lightsabers seemed poorly able to kill the creature. The blades would cut into the creature but then they would fizzle out. It made me wonder what the hell was that creature's skin composed of. It didn't seem natural...but it wasn't a natural creature, at least not according to Bastila or Jolee. Bastila had said the creature was created by the Sith; it made sense that the creature wouldn't go down with lightsabers.

Jolee turned off his lightsaber and grabbed a vibroblade instead from his belt. Bastila was the only lightsaber fighting combatant left, and she seemed adamant about using her lightsaber even though it didn't seem that effective.

Jolee snorted. "Much good that's going to do, Bastila. This thing seems to be built to be lightsaber resistant. Damn the Sith. Mind its claws and it's gaping maw. That damn poison its got is enough to knock the sense out of you. Probably addles it's prey so it can eat it. Particularly if its prey is meant to be Jedi."

Jolee seemed to have better luck cutting into the creature with a straight out blade than with a lightsaber but the creature seemed only more irritated as Jolee cut and then quickly used the Force to back away from it. He wasn't going to take any chances in having its poison mess with his mind like it had done to Phoenix.

Jolee fumed. "Where's that Thermal Detonator?!"

Canderous snorted and handed it to him. "What's the plan, old man?"

Jolee chuckled. "Just sit back and watch, Canderous."

Jolee set the detonator to go off and then using the Force he sent the detonator into the maw of the beast. The detonator quickly went off and the creature screamed and imploded.

Jolee laughed. "Hah...bet the Sith never figured that an imploding detonator would take out their monstrosity."

"Nice one, old man," Canderous stated with a mirthful look on his face.

Meanwhile, Bastila went over to the dead creature and managed to pick forth a slender metal blade from pieces of its body.

She was terribly quiet. It was far too eerie for the padawan not to be speaking and then I remembered the bond. She should have been suffering with Phoenix, but she hadn't. She looked a bit disconcerted and as much as I didn't always like her brisk and overbearing nature, I swallowed my pride and went over to her. "Are you okay, Bastila?"

She shook her head. "No, I...I should have been in the same poisonous fit with Phoenix but I wasn't. That disturbs me, Carth."

"Why should it disturb you, Bastila?"

She gave a long painful sigh. "It means my bond with her is weakening. The bond is still there but…it doesn't seem as strong as it once was. I..."She paused a moment. "I don't really want to talk about it, Carth. It's one of those things I don't think you'd understand."

"Try me, Bastila. I love Phoenix; if that creates a bond then I might understand."

"The…" Bastila paused. "You heard those words she spoke. The Dark Side cannot be vanquished, it must always exist. That's heresy, Carth. She might as well be asking to be thrown out of the Jedi Order. She's been corrupted, Carth. Our bond is breaking over such nonsense."

Jolee laughed. "That heresy as you put it, doesn't sound too far from the truth, Bastila."

Bastila rolled her eyes. "I should have expected you to support such heresy, Jolee."

Jolee shook his head. "Look Bastila, it was the philosophy of the Jedi that caused Ulic to fall. I was there when Ulic insisted that he was going to infiltrate the Dark Side to destroy it. It was Jedi philosophy that he believed in saying the Darkness could be destroyed in the first place. There is no way to destroy the Dark Side. Phoenix is right, it will always exist. Vanquish it yes…but it will always be there."

"But simply to accept it exists...means…well, it goes against the whole concept of fighting against it. It goes against everything the Jedi teach. To bring balance to the Force means one must fight and destroy the Dark Side."

Jolee snorted. "And she never said she wouldn't fight against it, Bastila. She just accepts it can't be destroyed."

Bastila shook her head. "It's this philosophy that's causing our bond to be strained. I can't accept it, Jolee."

I looked incredulously at Bastila. "I don't care what she believes, Bastila. I love her. And even if she has an unorthodox way of looking at the galaxy in general, she…well...she's managed to find two of the Star Maps under very difficult situations, and we need to… stop this arguing over this whole thing. Jolee, you mentioned you had anti-venom for kinrath which means you have some obvious skill in healing, so do you have any way to clear that terentatek poison from her?"

Jolee sighed. "Well...I know a few Jedi techniques to clear it out of her. But..."

"Then clear it out of her."

"Now hold on, Carth. I said **but**...and I am saying **but** because there are some poisons that can cause more harm than others. I hope..."

"You hope what?"

"Well some poisons feed on the Dark Side that exists and they cause a person to turn to the Dark Side...but...I don't think this poison is one of them…because from what I understand..."

Canderous suddenly spoke up. "Enough rambling old man. If you can clear that poison from her then do it. This is my daughter you're talking about and Carth's intended. So either do it or shut up."

I nodded; I wanted Jolee to help Phoenix.

Jolee snorted. "No need to be rude. Now, what was I saying? Oh yes...this poison probably exists to disorient its victim so the terentatek can eat its victim. Quite nasty, no doubt its poison has caused the death of many a Jedi."

Bastila stated. "Were you studying to be a chronicler, Jolee? You seem to have a wealth of knowledge."

"Ehh...when you get to be my age, you learn a lot of things..."

Canderous stated firmly, "Either heal Akume or shut up!"

The assassin droid interjected, Affirmation:Indeed, heal the master, or I will shoot you between the eyes, Old Meatbag fart.

Jolee snorted. "You do realize killing me won't get you what you want. If you shoot me...then Phoenix will still remain poisoned. Really such brilliant logic you have. Just hold on a minute."

Jolee bent down and put his hands on Phoenix. I watched as beads of sweat appeared on his face and his features turned slightly pale for a moment and then he sighed. "It's... it's done."He groaned and sighed."I need to rest a bit…that took quite a bit out of me."

I smiled. "Thanks, Jolee."

"Ehh don't mention it. Are you planning on kissing the Sleeping Onderonian Princess? From what stories I remember, you kiss the princess, she wakes up and the galaxy is saved."

I slightly turned red. "I…I don't remember hearing that story before."

Jolee grinned. "I thought everyone knew the story of the Onderonian Sleeping Princess. Course I've heard variations that it was an Alderaanian Princess as well or was it a Nubian Princess? Anyway, the Onderonian one fits best."

"Uhh why?"

"Because the one in the story I know, the princess was a Force user, that's why. Course most of the Onderonian royalty were Force-sensitive, but that's another story for another time."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

A liar that is what I am. How far can I crawl into a hole of my own making? One moment I was going to tell Carth that I loved Revan...Phoenix like he did and that we had made love to each other and...I realized it wasn't my place to say it. It was for Phoenix to say such things if she ever did. Seeing how Canderous and Carth had ended up beating each other up over what looked to be a misplaced affection (At least on Canderous' end). It seemed less likely that Phoenix would say there had been something between us.

Truthfully, I was glad for Canderous' interdict even if it was for the wrong reasons. Yet he had a point, there was no way Carth should marry a woman who wasn't who she was. Canderous thought it was because Phoenix was Akume and apparently he had told her such things. It didn't seem like Revan bought it. Well, of course, she wasn't going to buy it. She wasn't Akume. Yet apparently the faux-revelation didn't ease her mind any. It only made things worse. I didn't suffer the same fit that Phoenix did but I felt the conflict within her mind. I could feel the terror and confusion and I heard the words she spoke. Why was our bond weakening? I realized that Phoenix was falling away from her Jedi training and the Jedi Code. It was obvious that our bond was failing because Phoenix's alignment in the Force was shifting further away from my own. I feared that the next step was that Phoenix's alignment in the Force would cross over to the Dark Side. She would become Revan, the Dark Lord again. I couldn't let that happen, no I must not let that happen at all costs.

 _"No...It's a lie...you're trying to deceive me. It's all a Sith lie...I am Phoenix Star…I know I am Phoenix Star…you are only confusing me with the Force. You're not Carth…you're deceiving me!"_

I gulped, had Phoenix learned the truth of who she really was? I tried to focus on her mind. Did she know who she was? Yet, if she had...I would have to worry about that later. Mostly we were too busy attacking the terentatek. I didn't want to give up my lightsaber, I didn't care a lightsaber was what made a Jedi a Jedi. Yet things were even harder as we tried, and failed to keep from being Force pushed away, from Phoenix's wild uncoordinated Force pushes. She clearly had been influenced by a half-crazed desire to keep her own self-safe. I felt pity for her. If it wasn't bad enough what we had done to Revan's mind, it was worse to see her hallucinating from the terentaek poison.

I watched as Jolee cleared the poison from her body and I looked pensive. I wondered what would happen when she woke up. Would she be angry at me? Would she still be confused? Jolee looked at me and gave a faint smile. "She's going to be okay, Bastila. If nothing else...she'll probably act like she's hung over."

Carth groaned. "A hung-over Phoenix, great. You know I am not sure I like that idea. A hung-over Phoenix is..." He looked skyward as if he was reflecting on something. "Difficult to deal with."

A groan came from where Phoenix lay and my eyes lit up. Finally...how much did Phoenix know? Was she still Phoenix?

I licked my lips nervously. "Phoenix?"

"Frack my head feels like it got pounded like a rancor. What the frack happened?"

I raised an eyebrow. "You don't remember what happened?"

She shook her negatively. "Uhh..." She ran her fingers through her black hair. "Vaguely. I am tired, though. Did we get the blade?"

I smiled softly as I held up Bacca's blade and she clasped her hands around it. "Finally...let's get out of this place."

She tried to get up but stumbled and fell. Carth admonished, "Take it easy, beautiful. It's lucky you're all in one piece, that terentatek…"

Phoenix groaned a bit and I pressed. "How vaguely do you remember?"

"Everything is a haze to me. I don't remember much. I think I ended up attacking everybody, and that's pretty much it. I felt like I was in a dark bog if you must know."

"Nothing else?"

"Frack, what's with the interrogation, Bastila? My head is spinning. I feel awful and..."

HK suddenly chimed in. Statement: You were babbling incoherently, master. You incorrectly termed the Republic meatbag as Malak.

She suddenly laughed. "I did. Wow…I must have _really_ been out of it."

Affirmation: Of course, Master. If you like I could replay your incoherent ramblings, master.

"Err...no thanks, HK. Somehow I don't think some confused ramblings would make me feel any better.

I was relieved, clearly, an after effect of the terentatek poison was apparent memory loss or disjointed memory. It was best not to have Phoenix try and recall what had happened and it seemed that Phoenix had no desire to relive what had happened with it.

She struggled to get up, and I helped her. She leaned on me and my heart beat wildly within me. I longed for her touch. I so badly wanted to help her. I loved her. She was heavy, though, and she leaned on Carth as well. What was I going to do? I couldn't hold onto a woman who clearly no longer had any feelings for me. Eventually, Carth and her would get married, that was obvious, what could I do then? I couldn't hold onto a woman who was attached to a husband? Could I? No, don't be absurd, I had to let Revan go. But then what if Carth knew the truth...how attached would he be to her if he knew she was Revan? No, I couldn't betray the orders of the Council. My feelings for Revan were irrelevant compared to the overall mission. I had to stay firm to our assignment from the Order.

* * *

A/N: And this is the end of this chapter. I did have Juhani appear but it didn't feel right when I typed it out so she will appear in the next chapter. The Shadowlands are done save for a small bit and now back to the topside and a wookiee rebellion.

Thank the Force, I uploaded this to a grammar correcting app because my laptop crashed and I truly feared I lost this chapter but I didn't because of my uploading it to an app. All I can do is breathe a sigh of relief. I just wish my laptop was in better shape. *sighs* But I so glad I managed to salvage this chapter. So I am on my old lobotomized slightly rebuilt desktop. Blah…not sure when I'll be posting updates because I miss my laptop. Anyway…looking forward to The Last Jedi.


	69. Ch 68:Kashyyyk: Shades of Darkest Grey

**Chapter 68: Kashyyyk: Shades of Darkest Grey...**

 **~Juhani~**

My climb into the Shadowlands terrified me. It was a slow descent into a dark chilling coldness that numbed me. No wonder wookiees had a lot of fur. It was undoubtedly the chill of a dark forest where the sun rarely shone and it was perpetual night which made wookiee fur much more practical. This probably was about right for a planet where an artifact of the Dark Side resided. I wondered how Phoenix and the others were doing; hopefully, their efforts were a lot better than my own.

My claws were struggling to find a place within the tough bark of the wroshyr trees. Cathar claws were simply not as thick as wookiee claws. This was probably due to the fact that wookiee claws were more specialized towards climbing. My claws weren't meant for wroshyr trees. I hissed in pain as one of my sharp claws suddenly splintered to the nail bed and the blood started coming from the broken nail. How long was it going to take climbing down into the depths of the forest? I thought it would be quicker climbing a tree into the Shadowlands. I now began to realize I had made a terrible perhaps even fatal mistake. I cringed as another nail of mine cracked and I suddenly howled in pain.

This journey was far more painful than I had realized. I tried to ignore the pain and took a breath as I looked down to see how much further I had to go. I could not see the bottom and I suddenly moaned in despair. Maybe I should have tried to climb back up but I looked up from where I had climbed and realized to my horror I was too far down the tree. I had no choice but to keep going forward despite the fact that the climb was agonizing and painful. Going slow was painful like having needles being shoved into my nail beds and going fast felt like my claws were burning and on fire. I debated on whether my journey downward should be like painful pricks or burning fire and I made a decision.

I began a mad fury climb down and my nails burned with friction and I could feel my claws cracking. I took deep meditative breaths and kept climbing as fast as I could. I heard the cry of animals below me; perhaps I was a lot closer to the bottom than I realized. I looked down and in the dim light. There was light down there? I genuinely thought I saw the bottom. I saw the glow of something, and I finally felt my feet touch the bottom of the ground. I let out a sigh. My claws hurt, and I looked at my hands, they were coated in blood. My first instinct was to lick them; a holdout from my people's very primitive past. Instead, I grabbed the kolto med packs I had in my pack and injected them quickly into my hands. The relief and cooling within my hands was almost immediate. I gasped as I saw what was giving off the glow of light down here, a computerized interface that stood here along with a massive computer system. The computer and interface was massive and what startled me, even more, was the holo image that stood guard over the computer.

"Revan…" I muttered as I saw the interface of what looked to be the Dark Lord. The interface said nothing to me and seemed to ignore me. I shivered; this had to be where the Star Map was. I thought about Revan and the Jedi who had followed him. It had been Phoenix, who had saved me from slavery. I looked at the interface and said softly, "How could you have fallen, Revan? I believed in you and your followers. What made you fall? What made Phoenix who was Akume fall?"

The interface said coldly, "Ask the one you call Phoenix. She knows more than you think and her name is **not** Akume."

I shivered at the interface of Revan, what did it mean that Phoenix wasn't Akume? Was it conceivable that Phoenix was lying and that she knew who she was all along? No, she couldn't be lying. Phoenix seemed very sincere about who she was, but if her name wasn't Akume then who was she? And if Phoenix wasn't Akume then, someone was lying. Then there was the fact that machine maybe lying...but it seemed odd a machine would lie. Yet, the Dark Side seemed to be clouding everything around me.

The interface continued, "Yes, puny Jedi…someone is lying and the question is why?"

I froze, that damn thing was able to scan my mind somehow and knew my thoughts. My fur bristled, and I turned and left the interface not wanting to be any closer to it.

I sniffed the air; I smelled the scent of the others: Phoenix, Carth, Bastila, Canderous, and a strange unfamiliar scent. The scent wasn't too cold. This meant they were close by.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

My stomach felt a bit queasy probably due to the massive headache I had. My body was also sore from the wounds I had suffered from the creature that had attacked. My smuggler's outfit was ruined. It looked like Carth was going to get his wish, after all, no more smuggler's uniform. He was looking for a way to get me back into my Jedi robes and it looked like he was going to get his way. I looked at Jolee. "Old...Jolee...do you have anything for this massive headache?"

"Sorry kid, somethings have to work out of your system on their own. You've had hangovers before I assume."

"Yea, but this is the worst. Far worse than being slammed with a massive juma drinking binge. What the frack went through me?"

"Terentatek poison, kid. I think I got most of it out of your body but since Terentatek are Sith bred creatures that hunt Force sensitives...there is only so much the Force can do for you. But you were pretty bad off earlier, you were hallucinating. You attacked Carth...oh and speaking of which here are your double err...single blades. I am not sure what type of lightsaber you're going for kid. It looks like something Exar Kun would use. Not saying I approve...but..."

I chuckled as Jolee handed me back my blades. "Well, to be honest, I copied the idea from an Echani Dark Jedi."

Jolee rolled his eyes. "Any particular reason you'd copy a Dark Jedi's weapon?"

"I know what you're thinking, Jolee. But..."I paused and rubbed my throbbing head." His idea helped save my life earlier. I needed a lightsaber blade and...I was able to call on one of his blades. He also protected me. I don't know why, old man."

Jolee scratched his beard. "A Dark Jedi wanting to protect a Jedi, that is unusual, kid. Did he say why?"

I shook my head in the negative. "No, because he was adamant afterward that he was going to take me to Admiral Saul Karath and I refused, of course, and then the others came and saved me from him."

"Why Karath, Phoenix? And not Malak?" Jolee inquired.

"I have no idea, old man. And to be honest I was..."I suddenly turned beet red, I didn't want to admit that this was the second time I had been poisoned or drugged and I seriously felt like crap. Apparently, I had a very low tolerance to being drugged. It left me feeling uncomfortable and weak. I really needed to study about how to keep that from happening again.

"I don't want to talk about it. Suffice it to say...I was sort of out of it."

Jolee chuckled. "It's okay, kid. You've had a rough day. You've probably have had a rough few months."

I sighed. "You have no idea. It hasn't exactly been my decade to be truthful. But I'll live, that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?"

Jolee nodded. "That's the spirit, kid. And it's probably going to get worst seeing this journey you're on to find the Star Maps."

I suddenly stopped, the throbbing in my head and my queasy stomach got the best of me, I emptied the contents of my stomach all over the forest floor.

Bastila and Carth managed to hold me up, so I didn't end up in a pool of my own vomit. "Ehh...about your cooking, old man. I hate stewed kinrath but even worst is half digested kinrath."

Bastila and Carth shook their heads in dismay over my crude humor. Bastila frowned and stated, "That's disgusting Phoenix."

Jolee shook his head. "Seriously, kid did you talk to your own mother with that sort of disgusting dialogue from your mouth? I am surprised she didn't end up washing out your mouth with soap for such a foul disgusting mouth."

I managed a halfhearted chuckle. "Don't think she didn't or tried something similar. Anyway, I really need to rest. I feel terrible but..."

Jolee nodded. "You look like hell, kid. Once we drop that mask off to Grrwahrr. I think you need to..."

I shook my head. "Sadly we've got to put an end to Chuundar's slave trade. It cannot be allowed to continue. As sick as I feel, we have to do this."

Carth shook his head. "No, you don't, Phoenix. You should rest. I've seen you push yourself to the brink of exhaustion before and it's not pretty. Besides you have me, Canderous, Jolee, Bastila, and even…" He paused a moment and then said hesitantly, "HK. You're going back to Jolee's hut, Phoenix and that's an order. We can handle the wookiee rebellion but you're going to rest."

I looked aghast at Carth and his firmness. I turned to Canderous for support, and he said firmly, "I am with the Republic on this, Akume. You look pale and haggard like one step away from death itself. Even a warrior needs to recognize their limitations."

Bastila nodded. "You are not well, Phoenix. You just vomited and Carth has a point. You need to rest. I don't want a repeat of what happened to you when you faced Bendak Starkiller. Even Canderous is right about recognizing your limitations."

I turned to HK and HK stated, Statement: Even droids depend upon maintenance, master.

I looked at Jolee and he simply shrugged.

I threw up my hands exasperated. "My whole crew is against me. Okay...but Zaalbar and Freyyr are counting on me to help them fulfill their prophecy. I can't let them down. I just can't. An outsider...must give them the blade of Bacca. I promised I would be the one who would do so. I..."

Bastila put a hand on my shoulder and suddenly a feeling of warmth and drowsiness drifted through me. I glared at Bastila. "Damn you...if I wasn't so...weak…" I suddenly collapsed and all went black.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I felt guilty using the Force to cause Revan to succumb to sleep. Nevertheless, I was heartened to hear that Revan was very insistent that she wanted to end Chuundar's slave trade with Czerka. I had my doubts about Revan's alignment in the Force, but she kept herself mostly aligned toward the selfless actions of a Jedi. I wanted to hope that her actions proved her redemption.

Carth glanced at me and said, "Thanks, Bastila. I don't honestly, think Phoenix would have actually listened to any of us. She really can be as stubborn as a bantha."

Jolee sighed and shook his head but said nothing.

I stated, "Jolee, please tell me that…"

"What, you suddenly want my approval. You're a Jedi, aren't you? Then act like one and don't come to me looking for affirmation for your actions. I am not your master and I am most definitely not your father either. If you want my opinion on the matter...well, Phoenix was close to realizing she needs to sleep out whatever is left of the terentatek poison...unless your connection with her is so dulled, you didn't realize that."

I took a measured breath. "It isn't Jolee. She would have worked herself to exhaustion. She'd claim she'd take it easy but then she never does. There is also only so much Force she can use to refresh herself. She pushes herself far more than she should. I..." I paused and then said softly, "I care about her…and her welfare."

"You care about her far too much, Bastila. You hover around her like a hawkbat and don't allow her enough freedom and trust to figure out things on her own. Perhaps that is why she has issues with you in the first place."

I paused thinking over Jolee's words. He did have a point, but considering who Phoenix was I didn't exactly have a choice. I couldn't trust that the Dark Lord might end up re-emerging from Phoenix, to begin with. It was bad enough Phoenix believed that she was possessed by Revan. For Phoenix to even acknowledge that she was possessed by Revan was enough to prove to me that Revan wasn't as dead as I could hope. The possibility that the Dark Lord could return haunted me.

I sighed. "Jolee my reasons for being this way with her are my own and you should realize that. I have an important stake in this mission succeeding and..."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

"Trust in the Force, Bastila. Did I ever tell you the story about..."

Bastila interjected, "We have no time for one of your stories, Jolee."

"Damn it...you're going to hear one of my stories, Bastila and I suggest…"

A rustling in the forest and the sound of katarn growling interrupted my preparation to tell a story...come to think of it I forgot what the story was. I scowled. "Damn it, now I've forgotten what the story was, to begin with. Don't think you're off the hook, Bastila. As soon as I recall the story...you and Phoenix will hear it."

My hand went towards my lightsaber to counter whatever was coming towards us. I prepared to ignite my lightsaber, but Bastila put a hand up. "Wait a minute, Jolee...I sense...Juhani?"

I frowned. "Who's Juhani?"

"Part of our crew, a Jedi padawan along with me and Phoenix. And she requires our help."

I scowled. "Great...as if my backyard hasn't gotten any less crowded. And...she must have climbed down in order to get past the Czerka barrier and…I better go assist her because it sounds like she's got tangled up with some of the wildlife."

Bastila then stated, "But what about..."

I managed a slight grin. "You worry about Phoenix, Bastila. You did put her to sleep and I seriously doubt anything is going to rouse her now."

Bastila gently nudged Revan to see if she could rouse her from the sleep she had put her in. However, all Revan did was moan softly and then nestled into what seemed to be an even deeper sleep.

I shook my head. "Seriously, Bastila you picked a really bad area to force sleep on her. We could be attacked by anything out here and you..."

Bastila stated firmly, "I still believe I did the right thing, Jolee. Phoenix needs that rest, even if it's only for a limited period of time, she needs to recover her strength. She also needs to realize she isn't invincible. Although sometimes I think she thinks she is as strong as carbonite."

Bastila did have a point. It was true that Revan seemed to think she was invincible. Perhaps that is what caused her fall to the Dark Side. I shook my head and then stated, "Yea, you say that now till the katarn decide to consume all of us for dinner and we really could use her help right about now rather than spend time keeping her safe."

Carth suddenly spoke up,"I promised I'd protect Phoenix and I will. You, Canderous, HK, and Bastila go find Juhani."

The assassin droid suddenly spoke up, Negative: My position is with my master. I serve her not any of your whims, meatbag.

Carth sighed. "Find, HK then you can stay with me."

Gratification: Your consideration is appreciated, meatbag and lover of my master. Perhaps you are not all that bad, considering that you are a meatbag.

Carth muttered curses under his breath in something that clearly wasn't Basic. I wondered if he wasn't tempted to do something about getting rid of that assassin droid.

Statement: I heard that, meatbag and lover of my master. My auditory receptors picked up your most interesting vocabulary, I can interpret native Telosian dialects. You may dislike me, but you need not be rude or insult my creator.

Canderous laughed. "Telosian native dialects! I had no idea that Telosians had curse words."

Carth snorted. "Just because I speak Galactic Basic doesn't mean that most planets don't have their own languages and dialects. We just don't speak it often because Basic is the primary language of Republic citizenry."

Canderous chuckled. "I see, so you lose your cultural identity as being part of the Republic. That's disgusting. We, Mandalorians would just as soon die than submit to something that barbaric like losing our cultural identity."

Carth shook his head. "Yea, perhaps you did when we defeated you."

Canderous' face took on a hard look, but he looked at Revan for a moment and stated, "You know something, Carth. I really ought to kill you where you stand for such a comment but..."He took a glance once again at Revan and sighed."You're only standing here because of her and what she feels for you. Anyway, I am with you on this. You Jedi types can go protect each other. I adopted Akume and she's now my daughter and a father always protects his children."

Carth muttered more curses under his breath and then said, "Fine. You can stay here and protect Phoenix with me and HK. Now go help Juhani."

He pulled out his blasters along with HK and Canderous and stood guard around Revan who slept completely oblivious to the danger around her. I sighed, I wondered and mused that if Carth knew who he was protecting would he completely devote himself to her protection?

Bastila and I turned and trudged off together to find this padawan that seemed just like most Jedi, prone to finding themselves in trouble. Of course, my days as a Jedi padawan were filled with just as much trouble. Yet, those days were so long ago, plus I had a full set of hair at that time as well. Heh, maybe I wasn't all that different from Revan. Perhaps that was part of the reason why I wanted to help Revan. I saw shades of my own stubbornness and pride within her. Yet, Bastila seemed completely inept at trying to help the memory repressed woman. Of course, leave an inexperienced Jedi padawan to do the job that a Jedi Knight or Master should have been tasked with. Nevertheless, they probably weren't attached with a Force bond like Bastila and Revan were. It was so apparent that Bastila was in over her head and so knee-deep in bantha crap it wasn't even funny. Yet, as I heard the sound of hissing and growling from katarn, I focused my attention on the task at hand and ignited my blade and went after them.

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

This place was enough to drive my olfactory senses into a mad frenzy. I could smell a wide variety of animals as well as Phoenix and the others. Where were they? I could smell and sense that they were close but I felt confused. This place felt clouded with the Dark Side of the Force. No doubt that was making it difficult to find Phoenix and the others. I cringed as I came upon what looked to be some dead mutated rancor like creature and I shuddered. Yet, I heard hissing from the katarn that were in the area. They suddenly growled and attacked me as if I was interested in their carrion.

My hands were slightly sore, and I had a hard time holding onto my lightsaber as I ignited my blade to fight off the deranged creatures. I could sense their hunger. The katarn swarmed and I slashed at them and killed the first one who lunged at me. The scent of blood drove the katarn to a mad fury. I hissed back at them in a predatory display. I hoped that a show of my own teeth would warn them that I was not a creature to be messed with. Instead of frightening them off they mistook my action as a challenge and they circled around me. This was not my day. I had failed Zaalbar and his mate and now these katarn would surely surround me and attack me till I grew exhausted and they overwhelmed me. I was weary from my climb into the Shadowlands. These katarns could probably sense my weariness. I felt doomed and overwhelmed but I was a Jedi. I had the Force...just reach out and crush...

I hissed suddenly, that was the Dark Side. It was telling me to surrender to its destructive and seductive power. I couldn't do it. My time in the Dantooine grove taught me one thing. The Dark Side is/was a lie. It promises power but it is never enough and you need more and more of it to feed you. Phoenix was stronger than me when she confronted me in the grove, she didn't need the Dark Side to best me. Thinking about such power, I knew the Dark Side eventually feeds on you in the process. I shuddered, thinking if Phoenix had not saved me the Dark Side would have consumed me inside out and I would become nothing more than a shell. I had seen Dark Jedi before, skin like ash and eyes yellow or red. I must stay firm in the Light. I felt the Force re-energize me and give me strength. I slashed at the katarn and slashed the creature's body in half.

Suddenly a dark-skinned man came into the clearing, his lightsaber blazing along with Bastila's yellow double blade. I sighed. "Bastila...thank the Force."

Bastila's blade cut down several of the katarn and as she came to my aid she stated, "Juhani, I thought we instructed you to stay on the Hawk."

"That is a long story, but Zaalbar and his mate refused to stay put. I had to follow him to keep him out of..."

I bit my lips. Nothing had turned out right. I had intended to help Zaalbar and his mate and keep them from harm and trouble. Just the thought of failure made my claws throb.

The old man snorted at me. "Hey kid, stop getting down on yourself. The wookiee slavery mess…that bantha shit has been a long time coming and I know Zaalbar, he's Freyyr's kid. He's a good kid and all but stubborn."

He hacked the tail off of a katarn and chuckled lightly. "The name is Jolee Bindo case you were wondering, kid. And I am kind of surprised. I haven't seen a cathar since…well since Sylvar and Crado, actually."

I raised an eyebrow. Sylvar was a well known cathar. My mother had spent days on end regaling me with tales of the famous cathar Jedi. I owed a lot of my own fascination of the Jedi due to tales my mother told me. However, Crado among my people was known as a traitor. My mother spoke of him with contempt in her voice saying he had betrayed his people, and how could Sylvar love such a mate? Yet, cathar mated for life: so good, bad or indifferent a cathar stuck by their mate. It was easy to condemn another cathar for their actions but my mother loved my father, despite the fact he became nothing more than a stim addict.

The katarn whose tail had been hacked off howled in pain and Jolee shrugged. "It's said if you slice a tail off of a katarn it goes blind or loses its balance. Course that could be old wives tales."

The katarn that Jolee had sliced its tail off started attacking all the other katarn around them apparently cutting the katarn tail off had driven it mad, crazy, or perhaps as Jolee had stated it made it blind. He said to me, "Come on, Juhani, Bastila...let's get out of here before the tailless katarn gets over not having its tail."

We took off and managed to run a distance away from the katarn and their carrion. We breathed, and Bastila turned and looked at me firmly. Although I had told her briefly what I had gone through she seemed to glare at me as if I was a disobedient child. I glared back at her a firm look on my face. She finally spoke, "Juhani…I thought…well, Phoenix advised you to stay put on the Hawk. What happened that made you disobey…"

"Zaalbar insisted he needed to stand against his brother. He would have left regardless of my actions. I decided to go with him to try and keep him out of trouble. It…"I sighed."It did not work. His brother and Czerka are holding him and Wrrljiykam as hostages. He then sent his Czerka allies against us."

"Us?" Bastila snorted. "So others disobeyed…"

I hissed. "Now that is not fair…Bastila. Would you recommend I had left Zaalbar to his fate? Mission is attached to Zaalbar. You know that. She would not have left Zaalbar to his brother. Besides, we are Jedi, and Zaalbar is life-debited to Phoenix. I could not have…"I paused."Phoenix wouldn't have been happy if I had left Zaalbar to his own devices."

Bastila folded up her arms seeming inflexible to my statements. "Yet why are you here?"

Jolee suddenly interjected. "Now hold off, Bastila. Juhani risked her life coming down here. I am not going to have you lambaste her for her actions. She obviously had a good reason for coming down here. Did you even notice her hands? Her hands look raw. She obviously risked a lot coming down here."

I looked at Bastila. "It's true. I came here to ask for you and Phoenix's help. Particularly yours Bastila. Mission, Jordo, and myself we ran from Chuundar's alliance with Czerka. They know about our wookiee passengers. Mission and the others are planning to drive Czerka to Rrookwooro and hold the docking ring. Once we hold the docking ring we can drive Czerka from Rrookworro and..."I sighed."We need your battle meditation, Bastila."

Bastila glanced incredulously at me and stated, "My battle meditation is to help the Republic military fleet, Juhani. Not to help some petty squabble that the wookiees have with Czerka. The Jedi council would never approve of my using my battle meditation for something as minor as a slave revolt."

Jolee snorted. "I've never heard anything so convoluted. You have a great power, Bastila. I bet you didn't know but Nomi Sunrider used battle meditation to save her own daughter, Vima. She would have never have worried about some sort of order from the Jedi Order about when or when it wasn't appropriate to use her battle meditation. Nomi would have recognized the importance of helping others. That doesn't involve some sort of commission, order or command from the Jedi Order. It requires sensing and knowing the will of the Force. I would have thought that your connection to the Force and your battle meditation would make you sensitive to the plights and concerns of others."

"I am not insensitive to the concerns of the wookiees, Jolee, but battle meditation can be abused. This is why the Order is mindful of how I wield it and when I use it."

I shook my head. "But Bastila, I don't see using your battle meditation to help the wookiees as abusing your powers. If it concerns you...maybe we should all talk about it and see what the others say. We are supposed to think for ourselves on this mission, Bastila. We don't have the council or a knight or master with us. I think a council of our crew will suffice if abuse of your power concerns you."

Truthfully, I hoped that Phoenix would be able to convince Bastila to use her battle meditation. I knew Phoenix and her bond to Bastila and I genuinely believed that Bastila could be persuaded by the compassion that Phoenix had. Phoenix, had it for me in the past. Despite what the Star Map interface had said, she might not be Akume, but I knew the woman who had saved me from slavery. I believed in that woman and her sympathy; I was convinced that whatever the Order had done to her, that sympathy was still a part of her. She may have been a Dark Jedi but the Jedi had restored that part of her soul that believed in mercy, love, and goodness.

Bastila sighed. "Very well...we will talk to the others and if they feel I should use my battle meditation for the benefit of the wookiees I will do so. I should let you know that Phoenix was wounded by a terentatek. She was poisoned, and she's still suffering from the after-effects from being poisoned. She's sleeping it off."

My shoulders slumped but Jolee chuckled. "She'll be up soon enough, Juhani. She's with Carth, Canderous, and her deranged combat droid. She just needed to rest and well...I believe in the story of an Onderonian princess."

I frowned at Jolee's words. "Onderonian princess?"

"Ehh...I was reciting to Carth the story of the sleeping princess of Onderon. She slept for a hundred years only to be awoken by the kiss of a prince. Well…"

Bastila snorted. "That's a fairy-tale story for children."

"So humor the whims of an old man. I like old children's stories and...well I can't help but have a quaint feeling that the only person who probably can get Phoenix to wake up would be Carth Onasi and he's about as close to being a prince to Phoenix that one can get."

The old man seemed a bit quaint to me, but in a strange way, I liked him. He also seemed to know something about Phoenix. I wondered if him saying something about an Onderonian princess was a hint towards Phoenix's past. Perhaps talking to him about her would reveal to me what the Star Map interface had stated to me that Phoenix wasn't a woman named Akume, but I knew of no Jedi that had been Onderonian royalty. Although...the royal family of Onderon had ties in the past to the Dark Jedi Freedon Nadd and the Freedon Nadd uprising on Onderon. Could it be that Phoenix was related to the royal family? A cousin? An illegitimate child? Onderon did seem to have a good deal of Force-sensitive blood in its royal family. What did that old man know? It was apparent that he knew more than he was letting on. Yet, this pondering over Phoenix's past was counterproductive. We needed to see to the overthrow of Chuundar's partnership with Czerka.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I stood watch over Phoenix. She started snoring and I smiled. She was so gorgeous as she slept blissfully unaware. It reminded me of her back on Taris burning up with a fever and I had watched over her. My heart pounded in my chest, Force I loved this woman. A hand touched my shoulder, and I jumped a mile. Canderous laughed. "You've got it bad for her, don't you?"

I sighed and subsequently said, "And I've got the black eye to prove it."

Canderous snorted. "About that...you sort of asked for it. Doubting her integrity. It's pretty obvious she's over the two suns of Tatooine for you. I don't know why...Carth. I mean you're about average in appearance. You're not that…attrac…."

I coughed. "You want another fight, Canderous…then I suggest you shut up."

Canderous grinned. "No matter what you look like, even if you were the ugliest man alive, I think Phoenix would love you."

HK suddenly spoke. Statement: I believe I know what love is.

I raised an eyebrow. "What does a bloodthirsty droid like you know of love, HK?"

HK said, Statement: Well meatbags derive love from what they find pleasure in. and I can say that I have a definition of what love is.

Definition: 'Love' is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope.

I groaned. "That's what you find love in, HK. I assure you that's not what most meat...umm, sentients see as love."

Statement: Love is a matter of odds, meatbag, and lover of my master. Not many meatbags could make such a shot as I have described, and strangely enough, not many meatbags would derive love from it. Yet for me, love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticule, and together, achieving a singular purpose... against statistically long odds.

Query: Statistically, meatbag what was the likelihood of you meeting my master and as meatbags would say, end up falling madly in love with her?

I pondered HK's question and then sighed. "I guess I owe Malak a favor because if he hadn't destroyed the Endar Spire I would never have met Phoenix; and we would have never have fallen in love. I...well I suppose you're right, HK."

Statement: Obviously, meatbag and lover of my master. You see the statistics of such a meeting happening were incredibly unlikely and yet occurred.

Canderous chuckled. "The droid has a point, Carth."

I sighed and shook my head. I knew that Phoenix needed to rest but for her to sleep this soundly worried me. It worried me because her sleep and her dreams constantly troubled her. I should have realized it from the very beginning when we were on Taris. From the moment she woke up and our first meeting she said she had a strange dream. I thought it was the bump on her head and the fever she had that brought it on. Now I wasn't so confident. Her dreams were often filled with Malak and Revan. I genuinely wanted to know what was going on. Why did Phoenix dream of them? I didn't trust Bastila's appraisal of the situation that it was the will of the Force they dream of them. There was something extremely odd to this and my poor little Raven was tied up in it.

Canderous saw my features crunch up in worry. "She'll wake up when she needs to wake up, Carth."

"I know...but I worry" I pillowed Phoenix's head in my hands and kissed her on the forehead. "My little Black Bird...please wake up soon."

Canderous shook his head. "You're going to make yourself sick, Carth. You'll do Akume no good if..."

I cut him off. "Do you wonder why she dreams of Revan and Malak?"

Canderous shrugged. "Why should I care what she dreams about? Akume is a warrior and it's only proper that a warrior should dream of other warriors."

I snorted. "Her name isn't Akume, Canderous. It's Phoenix. Why do you call her that?"

"It's the name I adopted her by and..." Canderous glanced at me and then sighed. "Never mind. It's something she needs to work out and I can see she isn't ready to do so."

"Isn't ready for what, Canderous?"

"The name I call her."

"Her name is Phoenix, Canderous."

I heard a snort and Jolee entered the clearing. "Haven't you heard the phrase a rose by any other name would still smell sweet?"

I stared blankly and so did Canderous, and Jolee shook his head. "I am surrounded by idiots it seems. Does it even matter what she's called? She is who she is now...course that might change..."He looked contemplative and scratched his own beard."Ehh never mind."

"Are the others coming?"

"Yea they're coming. They couldn't keep up with me. Oh and here…pump this into Phoenix."

Jolee handed me a stim, and I frowned. "Where did you get this, old man?"

"Never mind that now. I need her on her feet and so do you all. And whatever we talk about you will want to agree with her."

"Huh?"

"Oh never mind…you'll understand soon enough." He grabbed the stim from my hand, and he said, "Do me a favor...kiss her."

"What?"

"Just do it. She'll think it's sweet of you anyway."

I scratched my beard, the old Jedi wasn't making any sense. I sighed and then shook my head. I didn't like being told to kiss Phoenix on command but the old man gave me a harsh look, I sighed and bent down and planted a kiss on her lips. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Jolee inject Phoenix with the stim. I heard her gasp and her arms enfolded around me and she pulled hard into the kiss. Our lips finally parted and she said softly,"Republic…" She sighed.

I smiled. "Anytime, my little Black Bird."

I heard a cough and turned around to find Bastila. She did not look happy judging from the way her face and her arms were folded up.

Jolee grinned. "See what I told you Bastila. He kissed her and she woke up. Magic like a fairy tale. Well, maybe not magic...well…maybe just a small bit."

I raised an eyebrow. I think I understood what Jolee had done. He tried to keep Bastila from being too upset by claiming I had everything to do with Phoenix waking up, despite the fact that a stim was the real cause for her sudden revive.

Phoenix frowned. "Fairy-tale? Did I miss something?"

I chuckled. "I don't know, except the old Jedi has a flair for trying to recreate old children's stories about sleeping princesses."

Phoenix laughed lightly. "I see despite the fact that life doesn't really work that way and I am not really a princess."

I smiled. "You are to me, Phoenix."

She chuckled lightly and managed to slowly get up. She wobbled a bit but seemed a bit more sound on her feet. Her eyes gazed at Bastila and gave her a hard cold glare but said nothing more. She saw Juhani and she smiled. "Juhani what are you doing here?"

Juhani sighed. "It is a long story, Phoenix but Zaalbar and the others are in trouble."

She nodded. "Since when are they not in trouble? Seems like everyone on this mission is prone to mishaps. So…what happened this time?"

Juhani stated. "Zaalbar insisted in confronting his brother rather than waiting for you and the others. His brother is now holding him and his mate Wrrljiykam. Chuundar then sent his Czerka allies against us. It's apparent that a war between the wookiee leadership is coming. I asked Mission and Jordo to hold off Czerka till we can give Freyya Bacca's Blade. But we need Bastila's battle meditation and..."

"And what? This shouldn't even be up for debate. Zaalbar is my friend and our ally along with Mission. We should help the wookiees out this is their home and we should do something."

Bastila shook her head. "My battle meditation is for the Republic Military fleet, Phoenix. It's not for something as minor as a leadership change for the wookiees. The Order wouldn't like me using my power for something like this."

Phoenix looked angry. "Unbelievable! So you'd let a sentient race die facing incredible odds against a foe that probably has them outgunned because of some order the Order has about you using your battle meditation. Plus you said earlier you'd use it for me against the Mandalorians but you won't use it for the wookiees! What the frack is going on with you Bastila? You'd do it on a small scale for me and the others but not on a larger scale. I am sorry, that goes against everything I believe in."

Bastila sighed. "I haven't finished speaking, Phoenix. Look, my battle meditation can be abused…I worry about that. But since we are so far away from the Council and we are on our own. I have agreed to a diplomatic solution. We will vote on whether or not to use my battle meditation."

My eyebrows raised. Now I understood why Jolee wanted Phoenix awake and to agree with her. It all made sense. He wanted her awake to support a vote on using Bastila's battle meditation. It was obvious how Phoenix would vote and I agreed with her.

Phoenix sighed. "I know how Bastila feels about this and I don't want to do this...but she should use her battle meditation."

Juhani nodded. "And I agree with Phoenix."

I simply nodded my assent.

Canderous snorted. "Democracy, what a quaint thing. Well, I support Akume's position so that settles my vote."

HK said nothing and Phoenix looked at him. "You're part of this crew too, HK. So you better chime in on this."

Gratification: While I am pleased that you think of me as a sentient, master, you must know that whatever position you support, I support.

Jolee shrugged. "Well, I abstain from voting on this because it's pretty obvious where the crew stands on this issue."

Phoenix shook her head. "Surely you have an opinion on this, old man. So why not vote?"

"Yea I do. But opinions are like underwear...everyone has a pair and no they shouldn't be aired out in front of everyone."

Phoenix suddenly threw back her head and laughed and then stated, "Why are you being so elusive about this?"

Jolee smirked. "Elusive? Me, elusive? Heh. Obviously, you've never tried to grab a Twi'lek dancing girl after drinking too much Ondaran willek juice."

Phoenix shook her head. "Fine, don't tell me, but one of these days you're going to have to have a say about what this crew does."

"Yea, maybe I will. But today is not that day and tomorrow doesn't look likely either. Anyway, kid, It's settled and you're obviously in charge here."

Bastila was about to object but then her shoulders slumped in defeat. The crew had made the decision that she was to use her battle meditation and what little leadership she had had obviously slipped from her. It was clear that Phoenix was in charge. Her whole stance and attitude showed a confidence in leadership. She took charge even when Bastila claimed authority, even though officially the mission lay on Bastila's young shoulders she never really exhibited the right qualities as a leader. I felt sorry for Bastila because it was painfully obvious that she really wasn't that competent as a leader, despite the fact that the Republic and the Jedi had fostered that position on her. This still made me wonder what were the Jedi thinking sending three Jedi padawans on a dangerous mission with no master and no knights with them. Jolee was probably the closest thing they and we were going to get as a knight or a master on this mission and he basically abdicated that authority and rested it squarely upon Phoenix's shoulders.

Bastila sighed. "I will follow the will of the crew, but it's apparent that I am not the right leader for this mission."

Phoenix rolled her eyes but whatever opinion she had about Bastila she kept to herself. Yet from the eye roll, I could surmise that Phoenix was annoyed at Bastila's statement. The two padawans had grown further apart from each other. Some sort of animosity had grown between the two. I wondered what was the cause of that enmity but regardless whatever rift there was that needed to be patched up. I doubted that I could patch it up.

Jolee could if he wanted to but the way he acted in getting Phoenix to wake up showed that he probably held just as much vitriol for Bastila as Phoenix did. I couldn't read the old man and his intentions and that troubled me just as much. I wondered if the old man could be trusted but Phoenix seemed to have some sort of camaraderie with the old man and seemed to trust him. I supposed I needed to give the man the benefit of the doubt, but I wondered how an old man that claimed he wasn't a Jedi ended up stuck in the middle of nowhere because it wasn't as if Kashyyyk was of any great importance. It left me with questions on how the hell did he get here and it did seem a strange coincidence that he just happened to be here.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Seriously Bastila was starting to annoy me. She simply gave up and deferred to me. I sensed a feeling of resignation, and I did not like it. It was a sign of weakness and yet something within me delighted in her resignation. She had been an obstacle in our plans here on Kashyyyk up to the point that she refused to use her battle meditation. I was proud of the fact that the crew had overturned her wishes.

 _You have broken her…_

Revan, go away!

 _I only state the obvious, Phoenix. Can't you feel her emotions, her turmoil? It is all over you. You have broken her. She is yours to do with as you wish._

The thought terrified me but...Revan was right. Bastila was like warm malleable metal. I could bend her to my whims and desires.

I shivered lightly, I felt a hutt-like-lust within me. An image of her laying beside me, our unclad bodies in bed together in a room that looked vaguely like a space station of some sort; and satisfying our passions...no, not ours. Mine. And she did as I wished. She whispered in my ear darkly, 'Master.' She grasped me and I groaned in pleasure. I recoiled in disgust at such a dark and ominous desire. Why would Bastila even give me such an honorific puzzled me? I was no master and the image fled before my eyes.

I sighed and repeated softly within myself, _I am one with the Force and the Force is with me. Its peace flows through me like the deepest waters and the deepest calm. I am at peace. The darkness is a part of me, but I am in control of my darkness and it does not control me._

The dark desire that was a part of me slowly drifted away and Revan laughed. _So this is what you do when you feel something that makes you human. You deny it._

I do not deny it. I know it exists. To know it exists means I am human. I am weak, but to act on it means that I have lost control of who I am. I lose what makes me human and I become lost in the darkness. No, I cannot be such a person, as much as I have that desire I fear what I would become from such action. I am a Jed...

Revan cut me off. You are _a padawan. That means one who is not yet a Jedi. You are not a Jedi, Phoenix. Not yet at any rate. You are an odd sort, one moment not wishing anything to do with the Jedi and the next claiming a connection with them. What sort of Force User are you?_

I had been completely oblivious, and we had been walking back to where Grrowhrrr was. Bastila caught up with me cutting off my musings with Revan and said, "Phoenix...are you alright? You looked a bit far away for a moment."

"Umm..." I blushed a bit not wanting to tell her about the odd sort of vision I had. Apparently, she did not share this one, and that was a good thing. I sighed. "Bastila. I am sorry about disobeying the wishes of the council but..."She put a hand on my shoulder."It is okay...I...well I sort of owe you for...well putting you to sleep. I…" She paused a moment. "I think it is safe to say you are in charge of this mission. You've always been in charge. I have been too proud to admit it."

I frowned. "I'd prefer that we be co-leaders, Bastila. You have your merits. You...have been a Jedi much longer than I."

Bastila suddenly shook her head. "But..." She looked pained suddenly and then sighed. "Let's just continue our mission."

I raised an eyebrow. Something was eating away at Bastila. "Bastila, what's the matter?"

She shook her head. "Let it go, Phoenix. Please. I don't want to talk about it."

I held onto her hand because something about the vision I had made me realize that perhaps I still had some degree of feelings for her despite the fact I was firmly committed to my relationship with Carth. "Is this about me and Carth?"

She glanced at me and then shook her head. "Partially. Look...I DON'T want to talk about it. You don't badger Jolee about things so leave me be."

I frowned, this was the first time that Bastila had lost her temper. I sighed and then walked away from her it only reaffirmed that she was hiding something, something that I could not perceive within our bond.

* * *

A/N: And this I feel is a good place to end the chapter. Well, it's taken me at least three weeks to write this chapter. Anyway, next chapter should be the finishing up of Kashyyyk. Should be….as in I believe that next chapter should be the wrap up of everything on Kashyyyk.

So have any of you seen The Last Jedi? I loved it. I know opinions are mixed, but I still liked it. Anyway Happy New Year and see you all next chapter.


	70. Ch 69: Kashyyyk: Different Philosophies

**Chapter 69: Kashyyyk: Different Philosophies**

 **~Bastila~**

 _"…You...have been a Jedi much longer than I."_

Those words were so wrong coming from Phoenix. A lie...well maybe not a true falsehood but a manufactured statement, from a woman whose mind was so horribly destroyed she honestly believed that her skills were somehow inferior to my own. I rankled at the words. Although, it explained Revan's inability to keep herself from being poisoned from the terentatek. She believed her skills were the skills of a student, a padawan rather than a knight or even the skills she had as a Dark Lord of the Sith. A true Jedi Knight would have been able to keep themselves from being poisoned or drugged. I had no doubt that Darth Revan would have been able to keep herself from being poisoned. I could perceive the humiliation that Phoenix felt at enduring through this not just for the first time but for the second time. If only Phoenix had access to more of her memories as Revan she wouldn't be feeling such shame or humiliation.

I discerned the truth, that Phoenix had no right to degrade her skills in the Force. She need only recognize who she was and her skills as Revan would slowly eclipse my own. I was more upset at the fact that I could not tell Revan the truth. It also made me realize my position as leader of the Ebon Hawk crew was a lie. Revan was the one that was truly in charge, not me. Although she bore a different name, she was very much the leader, even Jolee recognized that authority, naming her as being in charge rather than me. I was just someone in the background that watched her. Watched her to see if she wandered toward the Dark Side.

I had absolutely no control even over that because Phoenix did as she pleased. She did not follow the Order's methods or ways. She was more Revan than Phoenix in that regard. Give Phoenix the tools to be a Jedi and she went across the galaxy in a manner that was all her own. I had failed the Order, failed to keep Revan in line, that was obvious. Plus the fact that I had made love not once but twice with her. I began to realize much to my dismay that Darth Revan's return was not a matter of if she would return but when. I had failed dismally, I did not deserve to be a Jedi. I did not even deserve thinking that this mission would be my path to knighthood.

Phoenix...Revan seemed to sense my agitation, but I did not wish to talk to her. She tried to draw me out, but I wouldn't let her. I couldn't. She walked away from me but then decided to come back, apparently deciding she had let me cool down some and followed me even when I told her I wished to be left alone. She smirked at me with a confident grin. "Bastila…"

I said nothing.

"Don't ignore me, Bastila." She pressed closer to me and echoed into me via the Force: _: Would it make you feel better if…::_ She paused. : _: If I told Carth the truth about us and...pursued a path with you instead.::_

I cringed. She wasn't helping me at all. She misread my emotions and my intent. I had to keep my thoughts hidden, particularly from her.

I sighed and said quietly to her through the Force. _:: Phoenix...please. I don't want people gossiping about us or our little encounter. It was a moment of weakness brought on by unbridled passions.::_

 _:: So I am an encounter rather than a person?::_

She rolled her eyes and said vocally, "Fine...suffer in silence for all I care. Hide whatever misery and pain you have that I can feel rolling off of you and not share it with me. I've tried understanding you, even when you're obviously trying to drive me away and make me angry. I am pretty sure you're using our bond like a dagger against me to distract me from your true thoughts and feelings. You caused our bond to narrow out, but it's still there regardless. You've provoked me to react against you, and for awhile it has worked. I have been angry and frustrated with you. But I've had time to think about us...but to hold everything in away from the others and me..." She paused."You will stumble…and you will fall. It is…" She looked thoughtful. "I don't know where I've heard it but...someone said...maybe a master or a friend, 'It is a quiet thing to fall but far more terrible is to admit it.'"

"Go away...Phoenix. I don't need your comments. I haven't fallen, yet this nonsense you keep spouting about the Dark Side not being able to be destroyed. You have fallen, you just don't realize it!" The words came bitterly from my lips. It reflected my failure to keep Revan from falling.

Phoenix shook her head and gave me an annoyed look. "You think I have fallen to the Dark Side because I don't see the Force in the same way you do. Jolee hasn't fallen to the Dark Side, and I tend to think the same way he does. Fine, keep thinking I have fallen. I will still help the wookiees, I will still stop Malak and I will do it with or without your support. I'd rather have you by my side as an equal. It doesn't change our mission, in the end, Malak must be stopped. He is an imbalance within the Force itself. Getting rid of him won't stop the Dark Side. It will always exist, Bastila. How many Dark Lords have there been? Freedon Nadd, Exar Kun, Ulic Qel Droma, Revan and now Malak. And that's just a brief list, Bastila. The cycle will continue on. So like a good caretaker...we uproot what evil exists and restore what fragile balance remains. However, the stronger the light you shine, the Dark Side rises up to compensate. That is the Force, Bastila. Destroying the Sith doesn't destroy the Dark Side, and...as for the Sith..."

She sighed. "They are just as bad. They think destroying the Jedi will destroy the Light Side. It won't. The Force still remains. Your thoughts of...destroying Malak and any of the Sith that remain that somehow that will destroy the Dark Side. That's vanity, that's pride. It will be the undoing of the Jedi one of these days. But I do know the Force will remain even if there are no Jedi or Sith to wield it. What we have are incorrect philosophies for two Orders that can only agree that both sides need to be destroyed and that's a conflict that's brought on by the nature of the Force itself. It's an eternal struggle, Bastila. It is one that transcends the Jedi or the Sith. Perhaps…." She looked thoughtful. "Perhaps the galaxy doesn't need the Jedi or the Sith after all because the Force will choose it's own both Light and Dark."

I glared at her. "I will see to it that as soon as our mission is over, Phoenix that you are cast out of the Order. Your philosophies are heresy. I won't permit you to contaminate others, with your notions."

I couldn't let Revan corrupt others again as she had done during the Mandalorian wars. My duty to the Order still remained. Yet…there was something oddly familiar to her ramblings. I gulped inside. Revan remembered her teachings; part of her memories were returning. The teachings of her first master, Master Kae. The Jedi had cast her out and rightfully so. Master Kae was exiled not just for a forbidden romance but for her heresy as well. Such teachings had brought Revan to her fall and it seemed it was happening all over again. I had studied everything I could about Revan before we took off on this mission. I had to make sure the Dark Lord did not re-emerge.

Revan err...Phoenix suddenly laughed. "Fine, have the masters kick me out of the Order. I don't care. But I assure you, I am more a Jedi than that stuffy Order ever was."

I threw up my hands in disgust and left Phoenix. She sounded more and more like Revan and less and less like Phoenix.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I gave up trying to talk about my philosophies of the Force with Bastila. She was too rigid, too inflexible. If only she would bend...just an inch but... I saw clearly that without being flexible Bastila would break, like a twig. It saddened me plus the thought that she thought I had fallen to the Dark Side.

Why was she pushing me away? It suddenly dawned on me that she was doing everything she could to thrust me away. Apparently whatever relationship we had no longer mattered, that she was willing to hurt me and had no rationale behind it. If I had wanted to, I could easily stab Bastila in the back. I could tell the masters that we had had a whirlwind romance. She too could be kicked out of the Order. Yet, I had no desire to ruin Bastila as she wished to do to me.

I honestly didn't care if I was kicked out. I prepared after this mission was over, provided that I survived the mission, to be kicked out or I simply planned to leave. Frankly, I had no desire to be a part of an Order that didn't allow love to be felt or even passion in the smallest allowance. Apparently, being a Jedi was all that mattered to Bastila. I should have realized that spending most of her life in the Order had made her afraid of anything else. I hadn't the nerve to tell her that fear was a path to the Dark Side. She'd probably get angry at me if I mentioned that. However, If Bastila even considered an alternating idea...she rejected it and called it heresy.

I smirked lightly to myself, as I thought back on Taris. I wanted desperately to be a Jedi but now all I wanted to do was to leave the Order. That did leave the question what I planned to do afterward, provided I survived my encounter with Malak. Marry Carth, for one. Have a family. Children, I wanted children and I would make sure the Jedi wouldn't touch them, provided they showed any sort of inkling of Force sensitivity. Maybe convince Jolee to be the godfather of our children. He'd probably go into that kicking and screaming, but I couldn't think of anyone better to make sure the Jedi didn't mess with them than Jolee. I'd probably go back into smuggling, assuming Carth let me. Knowing Carth, he'd probably put his foot down. He was kind of old-fashioned in a sweet sort of way. I seriously doubted the Republic military would want a rogue Jedi in their midst, despite the fact Carth, wanted me to join them earlier on. They already had rogue Jedi during the Mandalorian Wars with Revan and Malak.

I carried the blade of Bacca and the helmet of the Mandalorian Jagi with me. I looked ahead and saw Grrrwahrr. He stood around breathing heavily, still apparently nursing his wounds. I smiled softly and held up the helmet and Bacca's blade in my hands.

Grrrwahrr's eyes went wide, and he barked out, "Our salvation...our deliverance. The prophecies are true. The Outsider has returned with the blade of Bacca. I will fight by your side…"

I was about to say something about Grrrwahrr's condition but Jolee came alongside of me and coughed. I frowned and said, "Grrrwahrr...you are…"

Jolee interjected, "We would be honored to have you fight with us."

Grrrwahrr barked, "I will meet you..."

I held up my hand. "Wait a minute, we need a plan."

Apparently, Jolee was insistent that Grrrwahrr, as wounded as he was, should participate in combat. I couldn't see a wounded wookiee would be of that much good. Yet Jolee was insistent. There had to be a way to keep Grrrwahrr from ending up being killed.

"You were a spy for Chuundar and as far as he knows you are still a spy. Continue your role as a spy Grrrwahrr except you will be my spy, my eyes, and my ears."

Bastila paled and cringed at my words. Now what! Did that woman ever liked what I had to say? She missed the point that I was trying to keep Grrrwahrr from getting killed and the best way was to have him as a spy.

Grrrwahrr frowned. "But...how does this help Freyyr?"

"I will send a Jedi as a prisoner to you...we have ways to keep track of each other over various distances."

I looked at those around me. Juhani wouldn't work, they knew her and the same with Jolee. So in the end that left me and Bastila.

I sighed. "I will be your…."

Bastila suddenly interjected. "No...I will go."

I raised an eyebrow at Bastila wanting to go.

"But your battle meditation?"

"I doubt the wookiees comprehend battle meditation, Phoenix. Plus being in the midst of Chunndar and his allies should make it easier for me to use my battle meditation against them."

"There is the risk Czerka might recognize you."

"True, but they didn't recognize me earlier. So I doubt they know who I am."

I nodded. Bastila was a strange woman. It seemed she'd use her battle meditation only for my needs but not on a wider scale like for the wookiees. When the crew, including myself, mutinied against her leadership and told her to use her battle meditation, she crumbled like a poorly constructed building. She seemed frustrated with me, angry at me occasionally, as well as manipulative, and yet she always seemed to capitulate to me in the end. Why? That in itself wasn't normal. Was it the bond? Well, that could be a very compelling reason as to why. Did that invalidate free will?

I pondered over this and remembered Bastila's comments from earlier. _Ours is the ultimate free will. The Force is our destiny, but the choices we make along it are ultimately our own._

So supposedly we had free will but...add a Force bond to it and Bastila and I were dragged about by our own wills. Her will and mine, both were in confrontation with each other. Some free will this was, I was highly skeptical over how much free will we actually had with the bond that we had. My will was clearly stronger than hers. I dominated her, it was no wonder she did everything she could to make me detest her. She was trying to break free but couldn't. We were trapped by that bond and both of us tugged on it trying to break free but we couldn't. This bond was seriously starting to irritate me. I wanted to live my life but I felt like Bastila kept mucking things up for me. I was sure the feeling was mutual, though.

I sighed. "Alright, Bastila. Go with Grrrwahrr, Keep me informed what happens."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

" _...Continue your role as a spy, Grrrwahrr except you will be my spy, my eyes, and my ears."_

I cringed at those words. Words that sounded like something the Dark Lord would have said. It reminded me of Katiyana, the Sith spy back on the Endar Spire. She seemed so proud of her deception. She bragged to me that Revan had told her to be his eyes and ears and that the Jedi had been fools not to spot her. Apparently, Katiyana had been under the deception that Revan was a man.

I did not trust Phoenix anymore. She was acting far too much like Revan than I liked. If I had my wish, I would take Phoenix back to Dantooine and have Master Jax try and do something about this. Although I had no idea, what Master Jax could do about this. It seemed that Revan's memories were slowly rising to the surface, whether or not Phoenix was aware of it. So who was I really dealing with? A woman who acted like Revan and insisted she was Phoenix. What had the Order done? What had I done? If Phoenix eventually found out who she truly was…this wasn't going to end well.

I walked off with Grrrwahrr. I rather be in control of this situation than have Revan go off with the wookiee and heaven knows what would happen?

I let out a deep calming breath. I could see Phoenix's eyes on me as we walked off. Her eyes filled with concern. I tried not to focus on Phoenix and Grrrwahrr barked at me. "Perhaps it would be better if I tied your hands up and took your laser sword…"

"My name is Bastila, Grrrwahrr. And I suppose you are right. If you're still going to act like you're under Chuundar's authority."

Grrrwahrr growled. "I am not. If I had a choice, I'd rip off Chuundar's head and feed it to the kinrath in the Shadowlands."

I nodded. "I suppose it's good to know how you stand on this."

Grrrwahrr snorted, "A wookiee never goes back on their word, Jedi. I swore an oath to the one you call Phoenix that I would serve Freyyr and I will serve him."

He quietly took some woven rope and bind my hands up. He quietly took my lightsaber and held onto it. Grrrwahrr then sighed. "I just hope...well...betrayal never ends well for those who betray a current chieftain. I hope Chuundar doesn't find out."

"I will do all I can protect you from Chuundar, Grrrwahrr."

Grrrwahrr shook his head. "If I die then, I will die. I'd rather die free from Chuundar's influence than be a slave to Chuundar's rule."

I sighed. "Hopefully, that will not happen. I am a Jedi and I will protect you. Hopefully, our deception will not last too long and Phoenix…well...I hope she helps free your people."

Grrrwahrr frowned. "You don't think she will follow through with her obligation."

"I honestly don't know. I think she will. But...I am not sure anymore."

Grrrwahrr moaned, "But she brought back the blade of Bacca and the Mandalorian helmet. For an Outsider, you are strange not to trust your own kind. But then most outsiders I have met are full of deceit and Chuundar only acts the way he does because of Outsiders."

I flinched at Grrrwahrr's words, so much deception it made my stomach churn in revulsion. There was so much of it not just from the wookiees and Czerka but from Revan, the Order, and even from myself. Revan, who lied and said she was a man. The Order for allowing Revan's mind to be reprogrammed, and myself for agreeing with that reprogramming and lying over and over again to Phoenix. How could I live with myself? How could the Order allow this? I looked at Grrrwahrr and said, "I am sorry that we haven't given the best impression of ourselves, Grrrwahrr."

"Well if your friend does keep her word, perhaps I will be convinced that not all Outsiders are bad."

I nodded, I just had to make sure Phoenix kept her word and didn't break it. I couldn't let the Dark Lord muck things up at all and this is why I went with Grrrwahrr rather than have Phoenix go with him.

As we walked we came to a basket, another wookiee kept watch over it. He growled at Grrrwahrr. "Who is this Grrrwahrr?"

Grrrwahrr barked back, "This is a prisoner for Chuundar, Gorwooken. He did say to keep watch for the Outsiders who came into our Shadowlands. This one I believe is from the group Mighty Chuundar wanted us to keep our eyes on."

Gorwooken stared at me. "We should do what these filthy Outsider slavers do, sell her as a slave. If the Outsiders can sell our kind, then we should sell their kind too."

I gulped, this reminded me way too much of being back with the Black Vulkers back on Taris.

Grrrwahrr said firmly, "Not till Chuundar has a chance to look her over. He has a right to do with her what he wishes first before we even have a say. Besides we should be better than Outsiders."

Gorwooken growled. "We are better than Outsiders. We can hold power over them. This is what Chuundar believes. Power over the Shadowlands, Power over Czerka and then power over others. We will soon overthrow Czerka and be our own might among the Outsiders. They will soon fear us."

Grrrwahrr sighed. "Gorwooken, those are the ideas and philosophies of Outsider filth. Isn't there enough filthy Outsider corruption among us? Our people will soon smell like Czerka and their corruption will be our own."

Gorwooken snarled, "Better to be stronger than them and hold power. Chuundar promises that we will overthrow Czerka and we will be masters over them. Chuundar says our future will have us as masters of Kashyyyk and soon even Czerka will fear us. We just need enough weapons and goods from Czerka filth and soon...so very soon...we will be masters of Kashyyyk and from this planet other planets."

I was silent or perhaps even dumbfounded as I listened to Gorwooken. It seemed that the philosophies of the Dark Side had even corrupted these poor simple wookiees. I began to realize much to my shock and perhaps horror that Revan…Phoenix was right. We had to do something to help the wookiees. My battle meditation was needed, Chuundar's vision could not continue.

I could no longer remain silent and I spoke, "Gorwooken, listen to me...please! Turn your eyes outward and know what is going beyond your planet even. There is an enemy much worse than you realize, much worst than Czerka and they are allied with them. If Chuundar's vision comes to past, you will eventually come under their notice and they will beat you down. You will never become a mighty power because they will come and they will subjugate you. Your people will be slaves to them."

Gorwooken growled, his eyes were enraged and his arm raised ready to slap me. Wookiees are strong and I was ready for it but Grrrwahrr stepped in between me and growled. "Stop! She is an Outsider. She knows more what's going on beyond our home. Don't hurt her!"

Gorwooken growled. "Traitor! I can see it in your eyes and in your speech, you do not support Chuundar. You will die for being an enemy to our chieftain."

I called upon the Force, and I snapped my bonds. I reached out and called my lightsaber to me and ignited it.

Gorwooken's eyes went wide in fear. "Jedi! Stay away from me!"

So he had heard of Jedi, apparently, wookiees knew of us even clear out here. Well, they knew Jolee, and he had been here for twenty years but perhaps there had been other Jedi who had came here in the past. Revan had been here, I knew that. Perhaps she had even had visited these wookiees as well. Regardless Gorwooken seemed taken aback by my lightsaber.

It seemed strange to see a wookiee respond in fear but apparently whatever stories Gorwooken heard of Jedi filled him with fear. Gorwooken suddenly ran away. No doubt he would go and inform Chuundar. I sighed, I did not like this but I filled my lightsaber blade with the Force and flung my blade at Gorwooken. I heard a moan as my lightsaber hit the poor wookiee dead on and sliced him in half. My lightsaber came back to me, and I felt sick inside. What had I done? I had killed a retreating wookiee that seemed more in fear of his life than anything else. I bowed my head solemnly. I suddenly heard Phoenix. Well, she probably felt my anxiety and my regret. : _: Bastila...what the frack is going on?::_

: _: I killed a wookiee, Phoenix. He was going to run off and inform Chuundar about me and Grrrwahrr. Our plan would have been discovered. But. ::_ I paused. _::He was afraid of me, Phoenix. It didn't have to happen like this...I could have stopped him without…without killing him.::_

There was a pause and then Phoenix sighed. _:: You did what you felt was prudent, Bastila. Discretion called for his death. I know...you're not happy about it but think...what would have happened to our plan if this wookiee informed on you?::_

Phoenix err...Revan was right, but Gorwooken's death did not rest well with me. A deep-seated cold rested within the pit of my stomach.

 _:: Bastila snap out of it...this isn't the time to feel regret. Get moving! If Chuundar finds out what happened to one of his loyalists then our plan to overthrow his corrupt leadership and rescuing Zaalbar and his mate will be for nothing.::_

I sighed. Why did Revan have to be so coldly efficient about these things? Yet her words rang with truth. Gorrwooken's words scared me. How could wookiees have such a dark view of their future? If we didn't rescue Zaalbar, there was the possibility that Chuundar would taint his own brother with such a philosophy.

Grrrwahrr looked at me solemnly and then put a hand on my shoulder. "Gorwooken was my friend. Yet…" He sighed. "..he sounded more like a filthy Outsider and less like the wook I knew."

"The Dark Side tainted him, Grrrwahrr. I am afraid it has also tainted Chuundar as well."

"I know little of this Dark Side you speak of, Jedi. But…" Grrrwahrr let out a deep moan of sorrow and then he climbed into the basket.

"Grrrwahrr...answer me this? Why did Gorwooken run like he did?"

Grrrwahrr sighed. "We have heard stories of the Jedi and their magic. It is said if you stare at a Jedi straight in the eye too long, you will die."

"So you see us as someone to fear?"

"Stories. Ones that my people know. Gorwooken feared those stories. They make you sound terribly powerful and sometimes vindictive. You wield lighting, you can choke others, and twist minds to your will."

I paled. Those powers did not seem like powers that Jedi wield. "That sounds like the Sith, Grrrwahrr."

Grrrwahrr scratched his head. "What are Sith? Your magic makes you powerful. You are Jedi, is that not the same thing?"

How to explain to a sentient that apparently had no clue over what a Sith was? It seemed that the wookiees could have met a Sith and would have called them a Jedi. However, this seemed to be an image problem. Several people saw Sith and Jedi as the same thing. I knew the reasons why because Revan had been a knight before she became the Dark Lord of the Sith. Ulic Qel-Droma and Exar Kun the same, they had been Jedi before they picked the titles of Dark Lords. Yes, it seemed that the galaxy at large seemed to label Jedi, Sith and Sith, Jedi and this because they knew no better.

I began to suspect that Revan may have had some influence upon these poor wookiees. Grrrwahrr seemed to confuse the powers that Sith normally wielded with how Jedi wielded the Force. Gorwooken's fear seemed to make so much more sense, he feared me and no doubt saw me as a Dark Side Force user. This made his death even worse to me and the cold feeling in my stomach even worse.

I looked at Grrrwahrr and said, "Different philosophies make a Jedi a Jedi and a Sith a Sith, Grrrwahrr. A tach is not a kinrath though and a kinrath isn't a katarn."

Grrrwahrr looked thoughtful and then said. "That makes sense…I think. You're saying a Jedi is a different creature from this Sith you mention. Yet you both wield the Force? How does this make you different?" He scratched his head still obviously confused.

"A Sith seeks to dominate others and spread that dominance over planets and the galaxy. A Jedi seeks to keep peace and balance. For example, this slavery issue with Czerka is an imbalance on your planet. I plan on righting that balance and restore Freyyr to his proper role."

Grrrwahrr shook his head. "How do you know Freyyr is the right wookiee to be left in charge of our clan?"

I was getting slightly annoyed with Grrrwahrr. It should be obvious to this wookiee why Freyyr should be restored. I felt like I was dealing with a child. "Let me ask you this, Grrrwahrr, why do you believe Freyyr should be the proper chieftain rather than Chuundar?"

"Chuundar's belief will leave our people without connections to our past and our ancestors. He will sacrifice our past to a cold and heartless future. Chuundar is like a rotted wroshryr, he will rot us out. He cannot stay as our chieftain. Freyyr respects our traditions, and he will keep us grounded like a wroshyr tree whose branches not only extend far above but below to the roots."

"I...couldn't have said it any better. But enough talk...let's get going in this basket and see to restoring Freyyr as chieftain."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I helped to lead the crew back through the Shadowlands and back to the basket affair they had come down. Revan seemed distracted well….I should have expected that since she kept her connection a bit more open with Bastila.

Revan paused a moment and she looked like something was bugging her. She finally spoke, "Jolee...you've been here for twenty years. Why didn't you do something to stop Chuundar?"

"At first, when the slavers took to hunting down lone Wookiees in the fringes of the Shadowlands, I did my best to divert them. Later, when Chuundar made his deal, I didn't see any point. I wasn't here to save them from their own sad follies, after all."

Revan scowled at me. "I am not sure I agree with you, Old man. To let such evil flourish and not do anything, It makes you just as guilty as Chuundar. Your indifference...it's wrong. Apathy…" She sighed."It's death. Perhaps even worse than death because at least your very corpse will at least feed life itself, old man. Your apathy and indifference disgusts me. Well, I can't stand here and be apathetic. You're a coward, Jolee. And….I despise cowards. You have the power to do something….shame on you!"

Revan's droid spoke out. Statement: Master, allow me to kill the old man for being a coward.

Revan shook her head. "HK...once again, NO!"

The droid let out a whimper and then was quiet.

I sighed and scratched my beard and looked at Revan, even with her memory damaged she still sounded like her old self. I couldn't help but smile a light smile which then turned into a grin.

Revan snorted."What's so funny!"

"You...well...you remind me of a Jedi I met a long time ago."

"And did they scold you as well?"

"Of course, they shamed me and...well cursed me. They actually stayed and tried to get me to change my mind."

Revan suddenly laughed. "You haven't changed one bit, Old Man."

"At least I am consistent."

"Yea, consistently wrong."

Revan's words got everyone laughing. The Mandalorian and the Republic soldier began laughing. A light smile appeared on the cathar's face.

Revan then sighed. "All joking aside, we better get going. I'll go first in this basket, and the rest of you follow me."

Revan climbed into the basket and began to make her ascent to the top of the planet.

After a few minutes, the basket came back down, and Juhani stated, "I will go next, Jolee, then I think the droid, then Carth and..." She looked at the Mandalorian a hint of disgust on her face. "The Mandalorian and then you."

Juhani climbed into the basket and slowly went up.

* * *

 **~Carth~**

As we waited for the basket to come back down, I contemplated on Phoenix's words, 'Apathy is death.' The words were dark in nature, but I began to realize that Phoenix had a bit of a dark undercurrent about her. Yet, she seemed to innately do what she perceived was right. I could understand Bastila's concern. Phoenix didn't follow the Jedi Code. Her philosophy seemed to be 'I will do what the Force wills of me.' Phoenix could definitely fall to the Dark Side with this sort of mentality. She was very much a proactive type. She would have chafed if she had been a Jedi during the Mandalorian wars. The Order's refusal to act during the Mandalorian war and Phoenix's driven nature. if she had been a Jedi during this time. She would have joined up with Revan and Malak. Yet, most of those Jedi ended up dying or falling to the Dark Side. Despite Phoenix's nebulous personality, I loved her. I would do just about anything for her.

Jolee suddenly stated, "So...have you considered what you're going to do if you lose her?"

"I don't intend on losing her, Jolee."

"I once thought like you, Carth. Sometimes love isn't as strong as you think. Now I suppose there are perfect, eternal loves out there... but I haven't seen any."

I frowned, I was getting irritated by Jolee's elusiveness. Even if Jolee claimed he wasn't a Jedi, he sure acted like one. "You know something, Jolee. I think you talk entirely too much."

"Maybe I do. Fine, don't say I didn't warn you. Maybe I'll go talk to Phoenix instead. She seems more keen on listening to me than you do. So go on, go run amok and kiss the bantha for all I care, I won't comment on it."

"Are you saying Phoenix is a bantha?"

Jolee laughed and then said firmly. "No, but...I think you're putting a lot on her shoulders. She looks strong, but she could crack one of these days. Anyway, a time may come where you'll have to confront Phoenix on her decisions. I hope...well...maybe I'll be wrong. Phoenix has a destiny, Carth. You have a slight connection to the Force. I can sense that connection. Maybe it's not a huge one, but surely you can sense something about her."

I frowned. "You're not making much sense old man. My connection to the Force is nominal at best. Yea, there is something about her, but she's a strong woman and that's all I can feel...maybe I am drawn to her power and strength."

Jolee sighed as the basket came down. "Yea, she does have a lot of power and strength but for a Force User than can be a curse. And I should know…"

Jolee motioned for me to get into the basket. I started to protest, "But what about Juhani's…"

"Bah...you're closest to it. So get in. Anyway, power and strength can be a curse to a Jedi. It was a curse to Malak, and a curse to Revan and sadly it was a curse to my wife."

I gasped. "Wife? You were married!"

"You know another way to get a wife? Now hurry up Carth, Phoenix is waiting up there and she probably needs you. Now go…"

Before I could respond the basket suddenly began to go up on its own and I realized that Jolee was pushing me up with the Force.

Wife. Wait a minute, Jolee was married! But I thought Jedi didn't do that sort of thing. Wait, the rumors I remember hearing as a young officer with Saul Karath about a Jedi who was cast out of the order for marrying and then afterward he killed his wife because they didn't agree with each other during one of the wars the Jedi had against each other. My eyes narrowed, Jolee was a murderer. I had to tell Phoenix, maybe...she wouldn't think so highly of this old man if she knew what kind of man Jolee was.

As the basket reached the top, I heard weapons fire and the sounds of lightsabers humming. This was probably as crazy as when the elevator opened up back on Taris and Phoenix and I were drawn into an ongoing firefight at least this time she was armed with lightsabers, and the old man was right, Phoenix did need me. He must have sensed what was going on above us. I grabbed my blasters and as soon as the basket finished its ascent. Juhani hissed at me, "It is good that you are here, Carth. We came back up, and Czerka started firing on us. It can be assumed that the wookiees are rebelling now, As soon as Phoenix came up, Czerka started firing on us. We honestly can't get near the Hawk or Mission. Communications are being jammed."

A wookiee growled at me and Phoenix frowned. "Take it easy, Grarwwaar Carth is a friend."

Grarwwaar barked and Phoenix said, "He says that he is here to help us retrieve the others from the Shadowlands but he wants to fight Czerka and you're getting in his way."

Phoenix chuckled. "Grarwwaar, no one asked you to be here. So why are you here?"

Grarwwaar was quiet for a moment and barked and Phoenix responded, "He says and I quote,'I am no slave, human! I am Grarwwaar, a free Wookiee. I do not answer to you. My actions are my own.' "

Phoenix shrugged. "You're an odd wookiee, Grarwwaar. If you want to fight, Czerka then go. If not then stop complaining."

The wookiee quickly barked a reply and Phoenix frowned but said nothing.

"Phoenix...what did he say?"

Phoenix responded,"He said...oh frack I don't know what the frack he is going on about, Something about an obligation to me. I think he's a bit deranged, to be honest."

Grarwwaar snorted but said nothing else, and Phoenix sighed. "We've got to hold Czerka back before the others come up top, it's as if they were expecting us. We're cut off from the Hawk, Carth. I don't see how we can hold the docking ring or drive Czerka to Rwookrrorro when they have us pinned down. It's honestly up to Mission, Jordo and the others. It's pretty grim. We really need Bastila's battle meditation."

I sighed and said. "Now hold on, Phoenix. Bastila isn't like a lucky charm. Remember, we still lost the Endar Spire back on Taris."

She responded, "No, she's not a lucky charm, but we could really use a morale booster at the moment…" Phoenix then looked thoughtful. "A distraction. We require a distraction of some sort. I doubt…well I doubt Czerka knows how many of us are here. Between all the weapon's fire and smoke from the grenades being thrown around here. They are so busy firing...but…we came up from the Shadowlands….and…

HK came from the basket as the basket came up once more. Statement: HK is ready to serve, master.

Phoenix's eyes went bright. "I've got it. You can mimic voices, right, HK?"

Answer: Of course, master.

Query: Master, what is going on in that droid-like mind of yours?

Phoenix grinned. "Lots of voices, HK. I require lots of voices. Wookiee, ours…I need our group to sound like an army. Make it sound like fifty to a hundred of us. If Czerka thinks that there are much more of us than there really is here, then...well it may not be battle meditation but it's likely to scare the wits out of them."

Proud statement: Master, your plan is brilliant. You really do possess some admirable droid-like qualities.

"Oh, one more thing don't go statement or query when you do so or Czerka is likely to realize our feint."

Statement: As you wish, master."

I was amazed, Phoenix's strategy was a long shot but she seemed to have a way to come up with a military strategy right off the cuff. I was a bit jealous the Jedi had snatched her up, she really did need to belong to the Republic military fleet. Her talents overall were being wasted.

Phoenix turned to me and the wookiee "Republic, Grarwwaar, fire rapidly and quick. I don't care if you're accurate or not just fire. Make this little group seem like it's ten times the number of people. Also like HK I want you to shout and yell, we have to make Czerka think we are a huge army coming from the Shadowlands "

I said, "Your plan is a long shot, Phoenix."

She shrugged. "I know but...it's the best plan I've got, short of making a suicidal run on Czerka and I don't know about you but I don't feel like dying today."

She then turned toward Juhani. "Juhani...I well...do you have any more lightsabers, other than your own?"

Juhani responded, "Phoenix...what do you plan on doing?"

Phoenix grinned, "Just another random idea. I don't know if it will work…but I have to give it a shot and I need lightsabers. And Juhani…shout as loud as you can. We must make Czerka think we are a very large group."

Juhani nodded. "I have a couple besides the one I have."

"Give them to me!"

Juhani nodded and handed them to Phoenix. Phoenix smiled. "When I shout fire…we start acting like a massive army. Okay…get ready….one...two...three… FIRE!"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

Everything busted out in a random chaotic pattern of fire and combat. HK's voice sounded out in wookiee roars and grunts. I recognized the words. It was a battle cry in Shyriiwook and then my voice, as well, as Carth, HK, Juhani, Canderous, and Jolee. HK was also firing his weapon.

I quietly tuned it out and separated the blades of my lightsaber and laid my lightsabers as well as the two that Juhani gave me. I felt the Force within me and I lifted all four blades up with the Force and ignited them. I twirled them. They felt alive as if they had life of their own. I flung them out towards Czerka and the Czerka guard cried. "Jedi…the blades….they're alive."

I smiled that was one way to demoralize our enemies as I twirled the blades around with the Force. The screams came as the blades chopped into the Czerka guards.

I could feel the tide of the battle turning and despite the fact that I did not have access to battle meditation. I knew that my stratagem was working, and Czerka had become petrified. I had no idea whether or not Bastila was using her battle meditation or not. I didn't dare reach out towards her because my hold on the lightsabers was taking a lot of my concentration.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

As I came up from the basket, I knew something was up. I could smell the acrid smell of weapons fire and the smell of grenades. I couldn't honestly see what was going on, but it was chaotic. I didn't mind the combat, and I figured that it was Czerka but an update would be nice. Carth was busy firing along with some random dark brindled wookiee that seemed to be the only other wookiee here. Where the frack did this big guy come from? He seemed to be helping out but I didn't recognize him from the wookiees back on the Hawk. Of course, I could be wrong. All wookiees looked alike to me. Yet, in between the pulses of combat going on I managed to get to Carth.

"Carth what in kriffing hell is going on here?"

"We've been fighting Czerka ever since we came up from the Shadowlands. We've been pinned down. I think Czerka has been trying to keep us from getting to the Ebon Hawk and the other wookiees. We don't even know if Mission and the others are fighting because our comm signals are being jammed."

"Any suggestions on how to get out of this predicament?"

"Phoenix is working on it."

I grinned, I wasn't surprised to hear that Akume was involved in trying to break us free from Czerka pinning us down."

"Any word from the Jedi princess?"

"You mean, Bastila. You'd have to ask, Phoenix. As far as I know… not a word or at least nothing that Phoenix has of note. She's been busy. I wouldn't try talking to her. She's over there..."

Carth pointed over to Akume. She stood as straight as a pin, her eyes closed and looking as if she was deep in focus within the Force itself. "What is she doing? I thought only Bastila was capable of battle meditation?"

"I don't think it's battle meditation, Canderous. She's got at least four lightsabers fighting for her. I've heard rumors that there are some master Jedi that can accomplish that but...Phoenix isn't a master...she's only a padawan. She's going to overdo it…if Bastila were here…."

I laughed. "Yea...except she's not. If she was, she'd probably have a conniption fit over Phoenix's Force use."

"You're calling her Phoenix rather than Akume, Canderous."

I shrugged. "What is easier? Calling her Akume or Phoenix and at this moment she prefers being called Phoenix. I get it...I'd be offended that she's rejecting the name I gave her as my daughter, but what am I going to do? Frankly, I am proud of having her as a daughter. She's a woman worthy of the Mandalorian clans. Anyway...what do you want me...well, what does Phoenix want us to do?"

"Shout really loud and shoot like a fiend. There are pauses in conflict like there is now...I suspect Czerka is getting fresh power cells for their blasters."

"And what about us, Carth? How our our power cells holding out?"

Carth sighed. "I have a few in my pack…but this combat isn't going to last forever. We really need Bastila's battle meditation. Where is it?"

I sighed. "I sure hope Bastila isn't dead."

Carth shook his head. "I doubt it. Phoenix would know that. They are bonded to each other."

"Well, she better get her rear in gear...we need her. If she doesn't start doing her thing soon, we're all going to end up a bunch of corpses."

* * *

A/N: And the battle will continue next chapter. I had hoped that this chapter would wrap up the whole story on Kashyyyk but...I felt that adding any more POVs to it and I did plan on doing a Mission POV, a Zaalbar one and a Bastila one was one POV too many. So I will save those POVs for next chapter.

Yes, I did add a lot of KOTOR II hints and philosophies to this chapter and considering who Revan's first master is...well it made sense to me. Plus I like tagging KOTOR II stuff and adding it to a KOTOR I story.

Sorry about the long pause between this chapter and the last one, I've had a lot going on. A birthday. Eeek I am getting old, lol. A change in my schedule at work and trying to tweak my resume and apply for another job.

Oh and on another note, I noticed a few incongruities in my chapters as I sometimes go over my work. One chapter had Bastila offering to use her battle meditation for Phoenix and then she refuses to use it for the wookiees. So I tried to explain that in this chapter or you could consider that Bastila is only loyal to Phoenix/Revan and will use it only for her needs. You can choose to see that as you wish. Anyway...I tweaked a bit on this. The next was Phoenix wearing her smuggler's clothing but a few chapters back, she burned all her clothing as part of her initiation to the Jedi so talk about retconning a few things in. Heh.

Again thanks for Ether and Kosiah for the reviews and the comments.


	71. Ch 70 Kashyyyk:Omens of Life and Death

**Chapter 70: Kashyyyk: Omens of Life and Death**

 **~Mission~**

Fracking bantha poodo…after Juhani left me and Jordo, everything fell apart. Czerka was going nuts and started firing at us. In order, to get the wookiees motivated to fight...well…I sort of fibbed. I told Freyyr Nix had the blade of Bacca. I knew she'd get it, but I lied and said she already had it and commed me to let me know she had it, along with the obvious that Chuundar had taken his son and his intended mate prisoner. Jordo ended up being a worry wart about it. Well, I should have expected that because he was Carth's friend. No offense to Carth, but Carth really could be just as annoying. But seriously, what was the big fat hairy deal? Nix was going to get it. Did it matter if it was an hour or two ahead of time? We needed the wookiees to react now and they were. Nix would thank me later for my actions. I tried to comm Nix and the others but got static. Bummer, Czerka must have been jamming our comm lines. Good thing I didn't tell Freyyr that or he would have known I had been lying. No offense about wookiees, but they really are not that bright. I guess it's all that sort of honor thing with them. I never saw Zaalbar lie, well he might not talk about stuff but he never lied. Yet the wookiees gathered their weapons and stormed off the ship.

Jordo tried to take command from me, saying I was just a kid. Seriously, the nerve of that guy. But T3 stepped in and said I was the next in command. Got to love droids, y'know. I guess because I was part of the original group and T3 knew that, or maybe Nix had me programmed in as the next person in charge of the Hawk if something came up. Jordo looked at me with a sour look on his face as we gathered weapons and grenades from the Hawk's stores. I knew Jordo could have probably overpowered me but then he'd have to deal with T3.

"Hey Jordo, cheer up. T3 just likes me more that's all."

Jordo shook his head, "So Carth allows you to get away with lying?"

"Nah...but we sort of have an understanding with each other. Besides, Nix is going to get the blade, so I am not really lying."

"No, but you are seriously stretching the truth, Mission. If my children exaggerated the truth like that...I'd..."

I snorted. "You'd what, Jordo? Smack their little butts. I am not a kid, let alone _your_ kid. I am old enough to make my own choices. Big Z knows that, Nix knows that, and even your old bud, Carth knows that, and that's why I think Nix programmed T3 to recognize me as being in charge. No offense, Jordo...but Nix knows me and knows I can lead. We've been through a lot on Taris."

Jordo sighed. "You may be a tough street smart kid, Mission and I get it that you, Carth and the others obvious went through a lot on Taris. I heard about…what Malak did. Yet, that doesn't make you qualified to be a leader."

"Yea and you don't know squat what that looked or felt like. I was there, I saw it happen. Buildings burning, people screaming as we hurried to get off that planet. I lost friends on Taris, so that makes me, Big Z, Carth, Nix, and Bastila like family because they were there too. So space whatever you think, we've got a wookiee civil war going on and in Juhani's absence I am in charge, isn't that right, T3?"

T3 gave an affirmative beep and I grinned and I patted T3 on his dome. _Thanks, T3, at least the droid doesn't question my abilities._

Jordo sighed and then stated, "You're not..." He paused, "You're not the only one to lose your home to the Sith, Mission."

I looked at Jordo, that was true. Jordo and Carth were from Telos, and I had heard Malak had wasted Jordo and Carth's home but it still didn't change the fact that I was really close to Nix, Carth, and Bastila.

"You know what, Jordo, never mind, I am in charge. So let's go take the docking ring and drive bantha poodoo Czerka to Rrookwooro."

Jordo nodded and shouldered a blaster rifle that looked like stock from Czerka supplies, it was probably a standard issue rifle that he got from them when he was in their employ. I grinned and held onto my brace of blasters. I never felt like a leader till now. I bet Nix would have been proud of me taking charge.

Jordo looked thoughtful. "I have an idea, Mission."

I debated whether or not I wanted to hear it. Jordo had been hard on me since he found out that I was in charge rather than him. Yet, Nix permitted other people to speak out and considered their ideas...although she could be tough on people too. Maybe this leader thing was a lot harder than it seemed. Nix made it look easy. I folded my arms and tried to look as firm as she did.

"Sure, Jordo. Just because I am young doesn't mean I don't listen to others. So what's your idea?"

"Well, I still have my Czerka uniform. I could...well...I could act like I am still a Czerka officer…"

"Yea, except Czerka saw you with us. Sorry, Jordo I mean your idea would work except they know you're with us. We're going to have to fight with the wookiees and hopefully save Big Z and Whirl."

Jordo sighed. "Well, I don't want..."

"You don't want what Jordo?"

"I don't want you to get hurt. I am sorry, but you're just a kid."

"Listen here, Jordo. I grew up on the mean streets of Taris. I have had to handle Black Vulkers, rackghouls, gamorreans, and my brother abandoning me. I may be a kid, but I can handle myself. Maybe I didn't want to...but I didn't have much choice. Now stop picking on me, Jordo or you can get out of this ship and leave. I don't want to face Czerka on my own with T3 but I will."

Jordo shook his head. "It's not what I want, Mission but I can't help but see you as I see my children. I am a father first and a father doesn't want their kids to get hurt. We need to stick together, though. I won't leave because you need me, Mission. And someone needs to keep the ship from being taken by Czerka. I doubt Phoenix, or Carth would want you to lose this ship."

I looked at Jordo, damn no wonder Carth and Jordo were friends. I felt like I was back with Carth on Taris. Jordo seemed like a nice guy, though, and he was right, we couldn't lose the Hawk. This ship was all we had. I sighed. "Fine...I'll stay with T3 on the Hawk. I don't like it, though. I could seriously help you. I am a good slicer and can get you out of a pinch."

"Which is why you should stay on the Hawk, Mission. You and T3 have access to all these computer terminals. You could seriously do some major damage to Czerka from the Hawk."

I grinned. Maybe Jordo wasn't that bad. "Okay, T3 and I will stay put and guard the ship and do some wicked damage to Czerka. But what will you do, Jordo?"

"Fight with the wookiees, of course."

He picked up a bag with power cells, and he charged up his weapon. "Plus find Carth and probably save his sorry butt. I've saved his butt before, by the way."

I laughed. "You saved Carth! I'd love to hear the story on that."

Jordo chuckled. "I am sure you would, Mission but that's a story for another time. We have to help the wookiees out and speaking of which, sabotaging Czerka's systems would be a good start."

I nodded and Jordo left the Hawk. Maybe being a leader and being in charge meant accepting the fact that some people's skills were better than others and accepting the advice of others. Wasn't that what Nix did? Well, maybe not all the time. Nix seemed to be a bit brash, she did things on a whim. She was definitely like a sister to me. We both seemed to act out on a whim. I wondered if she might be part twi'lek or at least part Vao. Nah, it was undeniably her smuggler nature. I hoped when this was all over, me, her and Zaalbar could go into business with each other. I looked at T3. "Okay T3 let's get started. Ready to give Czerka some trouble?"

T3 responded and beeped ::Of course, Mission. I love trouble.::

I snorted. "Of course, you do. You were built for trouble and... mischief."

I grinned and then patted T3 on his dome and said, "Course you could say the same about me as well."

We sat down at the console on the Hawk, and I said to T3, "Okay...plug in and do your thing, T3. See if you can connect to the Czerka mainframe."

T3 beeped and plugged into the nets. He beeped ::This would be easier if I had direct access to Czerka's computers.::

I sighed. "Yea, but I sort of promised Jordo to stay put and keep the Hawk safe, T3."

T3 beeped in response, ::You did. I did not.::

"So you'd leave me and go off on your own?"

T3 beeped :: I belong to Phoenix, not you. Phoenix is going to need help.::

"That's not fair, T3. So you have no loyalty to me?"

::I am sorry, Mission. Phoenix is my master. She needs me. I know she does.::

"This wouldn't have something to do with that deranged murder bot you managed to purchase on Tatooine, would it?"

::Of course not::

"Yea and gamorreans have wings."

::I do not understand the phrase. Gamorreans don't have wings.::

I shook my head. Droids and their whole lack of understanding of figures of speech. "Its a figure of speech, T3. It means...I don't buy your bantha poodoo. You've been brooding around the Hawk like a hutt missing his dancing girl."

::Droids do not brood.::

"Uh huh...yea sure, T3. You've been wandering all over the Hawk and beeping rather profane statements. I know enough binary to know a curse when I hear it."

T3 didn't respond for a moment and then beeped ::Regardless I believe I would be much more helpful outside the Hawk. ::

"But you're an astromech, you're not built for combat."

T3 then clicked on a stealth unit and disappeared from my sight. I sighed and muttered more to myself than anyone, "Great a droid with a stealth unit. That's all the galaxy needs."

I wondered who had installed a stealth device on T3. It sure wasn't me. Maybe Nix or maybe T3 installed it himself. That droid had a mischievous nature about him that was for sure. After all, that droid managed to slice into computer systems and bought HK-47. I think T3 was kicking himself in his processors for that action. Perhaps the stealth device was a way for T3 to compete with HK.

I sighed a bit frustrated, so much for being a leader. Big Z had let his impatience get the best of him and was a prisoner of his brother. Jordo insisted I stay and protect the Hawk from Czerka while he wandered off to get in on all the fun. Finally, T3 had some sort of inferiority complex that compelled him to go off and try and help Nix. My first attempt at being a leader was a total flop. I looked at what T3 had managed to do before he basically sauntered umm...rolled off.

Czerka's corporate accounts. Oooh, nice. I typed a few queries. Wookiee acquisitions. I entered the database and saw a list of various wookiee clans and how many wookiees had been sold from each clan and who they had been sold to. I raised an eyebrow at the list. Some were in Czerka labor camps, others were sold to various people and groups. I downloaded the list, maybe after this mission was done maybe Nix, Zaalbar, Juhani, and I could help free the wookiees that had been sold. Several wookiees had been sold to the Sith according to the records. I supposed that made sense considering the fact that this mission was following after Revan and Malak. It did make me wonder what Revan or Malak wanted with wookiees. I seriously doubted that the Sith would even state what that reason was.

I got out of the acquisitions file and looked towards operations on Kashyyyk. Weapons. There were gun turrets. They were programmed to go after targets that Czerka deemed as "hostile."I chuckled, it was time to change the targets to target the targets that were considered "friendly." This could be fun as I tweaked the programming. Nix would be proud to hear…wait a minute...I had a comm system I could comm her but the comm system was jammed. Well I had to fix that and I tapped away into the Czerka systems and suddenly I grinned as I opened the comm system.

::Nix, do you hear me?::

I heard a gasp and an angry voice. ::Frack it, Mission you just disrupted my concentration::

::Sorry.::

:: Nix…::

::What! A little busy here!::

:: The wookiees are fighting against Czerka and I have secured the Hawk.::

::Yea, Mish...thanks. Now keep this channel clear!::

The comm signal died and I sighed, Nix seemed a bit temperamental. I thought she would be happy I had the comm lines open and instead she seemed ready to bite my lekku off. I wondered what else I could do around here. I looked around the Hawk and planted some mines near the entrance just in case Czerka decided to board the ship. I sat near the entrance blaster in hand. Just let any Czerka scum try and board the ship, I'd blast them. Sadly, I doubted that Czerka would even try and take the ship. I felt like I had been crapped on and everyone else was having all the fun. I was going to let Nix know...no I was going to demand she take me with her for the next Star Map.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I walked silently saying nothing more to Grrwahrr as we went towards Rrookworro. My head bowed solemnly and taking on the cast of a prisoner. I tried to do what Revan…Phoenix asked of me but I could not. My heart ached at the death of Gorwooken. I would have to eventually come to peace with his death because I knew my battle meditation could be deeply affected if I could not concentrate. Tears threatened to come down my face, but I held them in. The more I thought back on everything that had happened to me since taking down Revan on her flagship; the more I wished I had never had taken the assignment from the Order in the first place. I wished I had never confronted Revan. And now trying, but failing to keep Revan from falling back into her old ways.

I breathed in deeply trying to bring calm to myself. I needed to restore balance among myself and already I could sense conflict in the Force itself. Revan...Phoenix needed my battle meditation and she needed it soon despite my reservations with her. Yet, I could do nothing for her as of yet. My battle meditation had one weakness. I had to completely focus on combat or I could not turn the tide of conflict. This combat could easily be lost.

Grrwahrr inquired, "So when we get to Chuundar, what do you require me to do?"

"Have me imprisoned somewhere, Grrwahrr. I need to be kept somewhere private so I can influence the combat that is going on. I can sense it. Chuundar is going to be ready to attack the wookiees who are coming to free your village. Encourage him to keep me as a hostage."

"Your plans make no sense, Outsider, but I will do as you say."

Walking into Rrookworro, Grrwahrr demanded an audience with Chuundar. He grabbed me roughly by the shoulders. I would probably have bruises later on because wookiees didn't realize their own strength. Entering the chieftain's hall, I noticed Zaalbar. He sat at what looked like a huge banquet table surrounded by food along with Wrrljiykam. Zaalbar belched and reached for more food.

I glared at the wookiee, all this time we were worried and concerned about him and here he sat filling his face. There was something odd about this, I shook my head at him and stated, "Zaalbar..."

He glanced at me and barked, "Bastila. It is good to see you. My brother and I have been talking. Chuundar has been telling me things... he makes sense... I think. I don't know."

"And what exactly has he been saying to you, Zaalbar?"

"I've been reminded of how Freyyr cast me out. We are stronger without him. Chuundar's way is better…I think."

"How is it better?"

Chuundar growled at me, "That is enough outsider. I won't have your words contaminate my brother."

I glared at Chuundar and then back at Zaalbar "Answer the question, Zaalbar. How is your brother selling your people as slaves better?"

Zaalbar barked, "We will become stronger from Chuundar's rule and..."

"With the blood of your own people, Zaalbar! I do not approve of this. I know Mission wouldn't approve and I...think Phoenix wouldn't approve of this either. Think Zaalbar! Think before you let the darkness of the Shadowlands crowd deeper into your heart."

Chuundar growled at me. "That is enough. Grrwahrr, why have you brought this Outsider filth to my hall?"

Grrwahhr looked at me, fear was evident in his eyes. He then spoke, "We have a hostage, Mighty Chuundar. This woman is with those who threaten your rule. We can use her as leverage with the Outsiders that jeopardize your chieftain-hood."

Chuundar looked thoughtfully at me and then barked, "Yes, and if the Outsiders threaten me and do not listen to me. I will sell this one as a slave or kill her."

I looked at Zaalbar. "Unbelievable, Zaalbar! Is this the reign you wish to support? You would support your brother who would turn on your friends and allies?!"

Chuundar barked. "Lock her away, this Outsider filth need not spoil our plans."

Zaalbar suddenly barked out, "Wait...Bastila is my friend."

Chuundar glared at his brother. "So you would side with Outsiders and their filth? It is their filth that compels us to sell our people as slaves to defend ourselves."

Wrrljiykam had been silent and quietly eating the food, but then she spoke, "The female Outsider is right. I follow what my intended mate wishes, Chuundar, but since he is indecisive then I have no choice but to speak up. There was no one, save Chuundar, that was compelled when he took me and sold me. Nor was there any threat or compulsion when you deliberately sold Freyyr, your father."

Zaalbar suddenly glanced at me and barked, "How could I be so foolish? Wrrljiykam is right." He turned towards Chuundar and stated, "How could you sell our own father? If this is your plan, how do I know you won't sell me as you sold him? Is this how our future will be that if we do not like what our elders or what others say?We will sell them!"

Chuundar suddenly growled. "Take them all away...they will be kept locked up. When the time comes, I will dispose of them."

He looked at Zaalbar. "We are blood, Zaalbar. How could you support the words of a filthy Outsider over your own brother?"

Zaalbar sighed. "Are we, brother? I am not so sure anymore. Bastila has more honor as an Outsider then you do."

The wookiees in the chieftain's hall gasped and then all in unison muttered in their barks and growls. "Madclaw… Filthy madlaw...he has lost his mind!"

A group of wookiee guards took us to another room and locked the room up. I sighed and looked at Zaalbar. "Zaalbar...I am sorry. I know you wished to reconcile yourself with your family and clan but it has ended horribly."

Zaalbar barked back, "I still have my father and Wrrljiykam. What little honor I have left is my own."

Wrrljiykam embraced Zaalbar. "I honor you as my chosen mate, Zaalbar. What little honor we have is our own and it is not tarnished with Czerka's filth."

I sighed and then calmed my mind. "Now I can accomplish what I had intended to do in the first place and I need you two to be quiet. Grrwahrr's insistence that I was to be a hostage was part of our plan in the first place. He needed me to be placed in a place far away from others so I could meditate in the Force and help your father and the others."

Zaalbar nodded, and I closed my eyes and reached out with the Force. My focus first found Revan...Phoenix. She had dropped her lightsabers. I added my own strength to her. I could easily focus her combat because of our bond. Her senses were my senses. Her eyes my eyes. I saw the combat through her. I added my own strength and support. I whispered to her in the Force _. ::I am here. The Force is with us. My meditation is your meditation now. It will sustain you and guide you to victory.::_

Revan whispered back _::Bastila...I…::_

 _::No words. I know. This is the strength of battle meditation. Whatever quarrel we have had is brushed aside this moment. We are united together. And now I must help the others, Phoenix. But part of my strength will remain with you..::_

I reached out and found the others. Carth and Canderous at first. They seemed to have doubts. I whispered strength and courage to them and my influence spread to them. _You are strong. Remember you are strong. Your combat will be as one and you will act together as your weapons shoot. Your aim is true, your blasters will hit their mark. You are together and united in a common goal._

I reached out to Juhani, her warrior and predatory sense felt alien to me. It burned with a strength uniquely her own in the Force. It could lead to the Dark Side, but at this moment the cathar was her own pillar of strength. I encouraged her to act on her senses and to go after Czerka but to use her skill not to kill but to frighten the enemy and encourage them to surrender.

I reached out to Jolee, but to my surprise, the old man seemed blocked off to me. I frowned, how could this man be able to block off my battle meditation? I didn't think that was even possible.

 _::Jolee...let me help you in combat.::_

 _::Bah...why won't you let me be, child? I can handle my own battles. I don't need some Jedi mumbo-jumbo to help me win a battle. And if I do, I can certainly let you know. ::_

I was taken aback by Jolee's refusal to let me support his combat. _::Battle meditation is hardly mumbo-jumbo, Jolee. The Republic has won many battles because of my intervention.::_

 _::Pshaw...unfair advantage you mean. Battles should be won or lost on their own accord; not because you can influence people to push further to victory or drive fear and terror into people's hearts. That's not fair...Bastila. People should rely on their own strengths, not some mystical Force power. I refuse to let you manipulate me. The others may be willing to let you manipulate their fates but I for one refuse.::_

 _::But Jolee how can you defy my battle meditation? That's_ _not…::_

 _::Normal. Heh...if you haven't noticed I am not your run of the mill Force User. And there are ways in the Force to keep your damn manipulations from working, well at least on a limited scale. It's called being elusive and not having anyone get a good read on your thoughts and...keeping your mind and will a closed book. Besides, you're good at that...seeing how you keep Revan on figuring out who she really is.::_

I cringed mentally and felt a stab of anger at the old man. How dare he compare my keeping the truth from Revan the same thing as him keeping my battle meditation at bay.

 _::I see you're not in a rush to tell her who she really is.::_

 _::Because...I don't know how... she'll respond. She's likely to lash out. Besides, she seems happy being who she is now. I...I don't have the heart to...rip out her very soul and feed it to her. Besides telling her should be your job, not mine. After all, it is_ _ **your**_ _Jedi_ _Council that seems apt to hide the truth from her, not me. Anyway, this is no time to question me about Revan. You do what you have to do, Bastila, with or without me.::_

I sighed, Jolee was right I needed to focus on the here and the now. I tried to flow a little of my meditation's strength into him, but it was difficult because Jolee was resistant to my influence.

I turned my attention to Mission as I stretched out to her. Poor Mission, she sat in the Hawk seeming to be bored out of her lekku. I felt sorry for her. She wanted so desperately to belong to our group and at times she felt completely out of place. Revan was somehow connected to her in some way. I didn't know why she cared about the affairs of a fourteen-year-old twi'lek but apparently, Revan felt some degree of compassion for the child. But Revan still thought that she like Mission had lost all her family and that they had some degree of similarity between each other. If only Revan knew...knew that her father was still alive. I envied Revan in a small degree. Her father alive and mine was dead. I wondered about their relationship. Did Revan have a strong…connection with her fath...no I must focus on strengthening Mission and the others around me. I reached out and reassured Mission. _You are important Mission. Nix has need of you, we have need of you. You serve a role in this mission, Mission. Just because you're young doesn't mean you are not important. You protect the Hawk. You keep our enemies away. A small dagger is just as important as a large blade. Your blaster will find it's mark on anyone who fights against you. You are strong. Your doubts are washed away in the Force. Be strong._

I felt Mission's resolve grow like the others around me. I quietly left my influence on her and reached out to Jordo. Of all the crew, I knew him the least. He seemed determined to make amends for his work with Czerka. I focused on that desire within him to strengthen him. _This fight with Czerka will be your redemption, Jordo. You will prove that you are loyal to the aims of the Republic and to those whose cause mirrors Carth's. You will fight because you believe in the cause of others that deserve to be free._

My battle meditation done with our crew, save the droids, which I could not influence with the Force. I focused more on the wookiees fighting to secure their freedom and keep from being enslaved. They were easy to encourage towards victory because they were determined to fight or die. After rallying our forces towards victory I worked on spreading doubt through the minds of Czerka and those loyal to Chuundar. Through the eyes of Czerka guards and commanders, I magnified the ferocity of the wookiees. I could feel the fear in their hearts. They saw the rampaging hordes of wookiees and feared that they would be torn limb from limb. It was an easy fear to plant because their memories were filled with wookiees that had torn their compatriots limb from limb.

Finally, I focused on Chuundar and those loyal to him. _Chuundar. Your end is near. Your father has the blade of Bacca, and the spirit of Bacca is with them._

Fear filled Chuundar's heart. I could feel him outside of this room pacing back and forth. He moaned in despair. The wookiees that were with him I fed doubt into their minds. That Chuundar was a usurper, that he was not the right chieftain and defending him would surely lead to their deaths.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

It was like someone had flipped a switch, my lightsabers came to my hands and my strength in the Force was renewed. Blaster fire that was coming at us from Czerka was now being aimed at them. Our fortunes had changed significantly. I heard screams and yells and then our attackers, the Czerka guards suddenly went running past us.

Carth's eyes went wide. "What the hell is going on?"

"Battle meditation, Carth. Surely you felt it. Bastila has Czerka on the run. Come on! We will chase them to Rrookworro and take this planet back for the wookiees."

Czerka ran away from us, as they were being chased by wookiees who were growling and firing their blasters at them. I grinned, I knew those infernal weapons I ended up getting on Tatooine would come in useful in some way. The irony being that those weapons were probably Czerka issue. It was amusing to think that Czerka was being taken down by their own weapons.

As Czerka was running, Jordo came running, he stopped in front of us a grin on his face. "Carth, thank the Force; You're alive! We have Czerka on the run, no time to stand around, we need to get going!"

Jordo opened up his pack and handed Carth and Canderous some power cells. Carth and Canderous smiled and taking the power cells and charged up their weapons.

So Jordo, Carth, Canderous, Juhani, and Jolee nodded and took off running after Czerka. HK-47 and I proceeded to go but before we could go Grarwwaar stood in my path. I looked at the wookiee and said in an annoying tone, "What the frack do you want?"

He barked, "To talk to you, Phoenix Star. Alone."

HK spoke, Cautionary: Do not trust this fleabag, master. He is likely to kill you.

The wookiee snorted and then offered me his weapon, a bowcaster. I took it.

HK replied. Statement: To surrender your weapon, fleabag does not inspire confidence. You could rip the master limb from useless limb.

I nodded, HK had a point. The wookiee sighed and then barked, "I suppose I will have to acquire a more acceptable form."

I frowned, 'acceptable form' what the frack…

There was a bright glow of light and before me stood the trader that had acted strangely to me earlier. The weapon he had given me disappeared from my hands.

HK stated. Statement: Master, the being is a shapeshifter.

"No kidding, HK."

"Is this more acceptable to you, Phoenix Star?"

I looked at HK and sighed. "HK, go off with the others. If this hutt slime makes any attempt on my life. I will gut him, shapeshifter or not."

Eli, if that was who he was, chuckled. "I must say...you haven't changed at all...Phoenix Star."

The way he said my name as if he was mocking me or my name. I felt anger at his total disrespect.

Cautionary: But Master...

"Leave. I can defend myself."

HK gave an exasperated statement, Statement: As you wish, master.

He went off and I turned to 'Eli.' "Alright, Eli...if that is who you are? I don't trust you. You murdered a man's business partners."

"You are correct, Phoenix Star. Eli isn't my name. Be that as it may, I did not murder Matton's business partners, that would be the 'other' Eli Gand. I just happened upon him and..." 'Eli' grinned."Justice comes quickly to the condemned."

He kept saying my full name, although not in the mocking manner that he first said it. Yet using my full name was seriously bugging me, it was as if he was challenging who I was. Frack, this was as bad as Canderous calling me Akume. I looked at him with an annoyed expression. He merely smiled at me.

I snorted. "You're still a killer and…what of Matton, did you kill him as well?"

"I prefer the term, professional assassin, Phoenix Star. And no, I did not kill Matton, this disturbance with the wookiees precipitated his release from his business obligation and I let him go."

"So who the hell are you? And what do you wish to speak to me about and why didn't you speak to me earlier?"

"My name is not for your ears, Phoenix Star. Perhaps one day you will...know my name when you know yourself."

"What do you mean by that?" I was confused. "I have never seen you before in my life."

'Eli' chuckled."That is true, Phoenix Star. Few have recognized me in my true form. As for not talking to you earlier, you were surrounded by inferiors, including that rather annoying padawan that you seem attached to. Anyway…about the Dark Lord of the Sith."

"Malak? Did Malak send you?" I prepared to ignite my lightsaber blades to protect myself.

'Eli' laughed. "Of course not, he is inept. I do not deal with those who are inept. I prefer dealing with those who have a mind towards maintaining the galaxy in a functional and tidy manner. Plus, they do not so crudely bring things to ruin. Malak and my group do not see eye-to-eye, Phoenix Star. But...I think you do. It is inevitable that you will face Malak, Phoenix Star."

"And?"

"And...well..."He paused and said, "Well...things are complicated...seeing how you consider yourself a Jedi. There is also the fact that Jedi and my group do not generally see eye-to-eye. However, I think I can make an exception for you. Anyway...my resources are available to you. They have...well they always will be accessible to you, my "Ravenhearted" Jedi. You need only ask Phoenix Star."

Something about this seemed odd, and 'Eli' laughed. "This conversation has gone on long enough and your 'friends' surely will be worried about you."

He proceeded to walk off, but he turned suddenly. "Oh one more thing, the datapad I gave you. It will give you the answers you seek and how to contact me."

"But it's locked."

'Eli' grinned."Naturally. In time I think you may figure out the password. You are a clever one, Phoenix Star. Such puzzles are intriguing to a mind such as yours, assuming your mind has not been dulled during your time with the Jedi. Till our next meeting, Phoenix Star."

He gave me a light bow out of respect. He then turned and walked away. I shook my head and dug out the datapad he had given me and I typed in the word: **Ravenhearted**

Results: **Access denied.**

Okay, so that wasn't the word or even the phrase that opened the datapad. 'Eli' spoke as if he and I had met before. Yet, considering that 'Eli' was a shapeshifter the odds that I could have met him before and didn't know it were pretty high. There was a gap in my memories, that damn rodian on Tatooine had confirmed it. I had little to no memory of what happened between me, the rodian and Calo Nord the first time. I didn't like the idea that 'Eli' might have something to do with that as well. However, I honestly didn't have time to puzzle a mysterious assassin and his hidden knowledge; so I put the datapad back into my pack and went running after my friends.

* * *

 **~T3-M4~**

I rolled stealthfully into Czerka's headquarters. I had to prove to Phoenix that I was just as capable of being useful as that assassin machine. Mission was right, I was an astromech and combat was not my strength but that didn't mean I couldn't be useful to her. I rolled quietly passed other droids and other sentients, but the sentients seemed busy leaving their headquarters and going after the wookiees. My stun arm was ready to stun anyone who might notice me in case my stealth failed me. I had found the stealth unit on a deactivated droid that had belonged to Davik. I had taken the part and integrated it into my own systems. I was so gratified that Phoenix had purchased me rather than Davik. Phoenix was my owner, and I would do anything for her even if she was Darth Revan but...she retained no memory of being her. I wondered what a memory wipe had been like for her. Was it similar to droid memory wipes and did her memory have fragments of her past? Memory wipes weren't perfect. Droids often knew they had gaps in their memory. Just in case my memory was wiped or damaged, I made sure a good deal of my memory was put into a file on the Hawk's computer system. If I had gaps, I would download it. Did Revan have a backup memory file? I reflected on this and suddenly a protocol droid stopped me. His sensors must have picked me up, and I deactivated my stealth unit.

"Greetings unidentified astromech droid, I am B4-D4. I don't recall you in our lists of Czerka droid acquisitions. Come to think of it, when did an astromech droid acquire a stealth device?"

I beeped annoyingly ::I am allowed a stealth device by my owner. She allows me a good deal of freedom.::

Technically that wasn't a lie, Phoenix…Revan did grant me a lot of freedom that other droids presumably wouldn't have gotten. I appreciated her and she liked me, at least she liked me enough to promise not to memory wipe me.

B4-D4 responded, "She? There are few sentient females on Kashyyyk that I can think of that are employed or on Czerka's payroll at this time. Who is your owner?"

I contemplated my answer and then beeped. ::Darth Revan::

B4-D4 was quiet for a moment then replied, "You obviously need a memory wipe. There is no Darth Revan on Czerka's payroll or employ at this time. Plus the sentient you mention according to my records is dead and isn't listed as a female."

This conversation was getting tedious. I beeped a testy response,:: I am not the one who needs a memory wipe. Darth Revan is with the Sith. She is not with Czerka. You do know what a Sith Lord is, don't you, B4-D4? I suggest you research what that means. She goes and does what she wants and so do I, on her whim. You should double check your records and your memory circuits, B4-D4 because I am telling you the truth that Darth Revan is my owner.::

B4-D4 paused and seemed to be contemplating my response and then stated. "Perhaps you are right. Yes, I will go double check records and check my memory circuits, as you do seem very insistent. And I know for a fact that droids are not programmed to lie."

Finally, B4-D4 went wandering off leaving me back to what I intended to do, find the Czerka mainframe that was here on Kashyyyk.

I found the Czerka mainframe and managed to bypass the security protocols to get into the mainframe room. There had to be a wealth of data that existed here, far more than the data I had helped Mission get to on the Hawk. I entered the mainframe and plugged myself in. There was enough data on Czerka for Phoenix to accomplish what she wished with them. She could give the Republic this information and possibly put Czerka into trouble with the Republic. Yet, the Republic probably already knew that Czerka had affairs with the Sith as a lot of the weapons the Republic and Sith used were from Czerka. It made no sense why the Republic didn't act. Weren't the Republic at war with the Sith? And Czerka clearly had business dealings not just with the Republic but with the Sith. Why the Republic didn't do anything about it puzzled my programming.

I went through the security files as well and there were several wookiees locked up in this facility awaiting delivery to various owners. I sliced through the security and released the imprisoned wookiees. I felt like my work was done. I had found info to help Phoenix deal with the corrupt nature of Czerka. She'd be so pleased with me. The wookiees of the building were freed to do as they wished. I now had to find Phoenix. I rolled off quite pleased with what I had accomplished to help Phoenix and the others out.

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

Begrudgingly, I had to admit that Bastila's battle meditation was helpful. It had been helpful for Nomi Sunrider during Exar Kun's war. I still didn't like the fact that one person could single-handedly motivate a combat to victory for one side and defeat for another. Something about it just wrinkled me the wrong way. Yet, I suppose if it hadn't been for Bastila; Revan and Malak would have taken over the Republic, and we would have been in for a rough time. The fact remained that Revan and Bastila could easily tip the balance of the galaxy either way. It was a scary thought that Revan's destiny could play such a role. I had my doubts that Revan could actually be redeemed. It wasn't as if Revan wasn't trying to redeem herself but darkness still trailed from her. Once you fall down the Dark path, it has a way of dominating your destiny and consuming you like it did with my wife.

We went trailing after Czerka and the wookiees, we were running fast and suddenly Carth stopped. "Where's Phoenix? She was right behind me."

HK-47 finally caught up with us and I looked at the droid. "Where's your master, tin man?"

Agitated Statement: Do not call me tin man, Old Geriatric Meabag Fart. My master had some business she needed to handle and she sent me on. If she does not come back, I will never forgive myself and I swear I will kill every sentient on this planet in revenge for her death.

"Bah...she's not dead. I could sense her death if she was. I think you just want an excuse to kill something."

The droid was quiet. Hah, I was right. Finally, Revan came, she looked troubled about something, but as soon as she caught up to us, her worry washed off her face and I said to her, "You look like something is on your mind, lass."

"Yea, but no time to worry about it, we have a wookiee rebellion to finish up with. We have the advantage, Jolee, so we need to press forward."

"Alright kid, I won't press you on whatever happened but you look like you need to talk about it."

Revan sighed. "It's probably nothing, Old Man... But I feel like..."

"Feel like what, kid?"

"Nothing, it's my problem, Old Man. Not yours."

Carth came up and rubbed her hand. "What's the matter, my little blackbird?"

"Frack...back off all of you. We can talk about it later, right now we need to get to Bastila, Zaalbar, his mate and free this planet."

Carth nodded. "Okay, gorgeous. We can talk later. But if I worry about you, it's because I love and care about you."

Revan sighed and her features softened. "Sorry if I seemed a bit upset. It's just...well...we need to get a move on."

Carth nodded and then grasped Revan by the hand and both of them hurried off. The droid, Jordo, and Juhani followed. The greatest fault of the Jedi was that they could not understand that love didn't condemn that it could save. Carth's love could save Revan. I saw it clearly and distinctly. However, that love could also be twisted in a dark manner. My wife tried to use that love to beg me to join Exar Kun's crusade against the Jedi. I sniffed lightly, I missed my wife. I still loved her. When I ended up on Kashyyyk, I was pretty certain Kashyyyk was where I was going to die. Yet, Revan being here for the third time changed everything. I was getting ready to sprint off when Canderous interrupted me.

"Mandalorians never are this complex about love. We just grab our mate, announce our intent to our clan-head and it's done."

"Bah, and don't you think Phoenix hasn't done that already. She's already announced to everyone here she's going to marry Carth. You're the one that's refusing to let them marry."

"Look, Old Man, I know enough that Phoenix shouldn't marry, Carth. Not till she figures out who she really is and all I know is she's not Phoenix. Her name is Akume...Akume Dreamsong."

I rolled my eyes, I wondered who told Canderous that load of bunk. "Yes...but the feelings they feel are real, Canderous. What right do you have to deny them that?"

Canderous sighed. "I'll think about it, Old Man. I adopted her to protect her."

"Did it ever occur to you…? Well...I've said it to Bastila, and I'll say it to you as well, Mandalorian. She has enough problems with people that hover over her. Back off and give her some space. She can figure out her own path and her own destiny. If you hover over her too much she won't figure out on her own what path she is supposed to take. Even Carth knows when to back off."

Canderous snorted. "Carth is like a dog. Phoenix tells him to roll over and he does it. He's pathetic."

I laughed. "So are most people that fall in love. Have you ever been in love, Canderous?"

"Yea...and my wife deserted me. Much good love did for me."

"At least your wife is still alive, Canderous."

"Hopefully, she is. But I haven't heard from her in years, and I suppose I deserved it. I sent credits so our clan and family would survive. She didn't appreciate my efforts because the next thing I know our clan pulled out and...left me high and dry."

"You know if you wanted to you probably could find her and..."

"And what? It's obvious she wants nothing to do with me. I failed our clan when Revan and Malak defeated the clans."

"Bah...you didn't fail your people, Canderous. Revan and Malak wanted the victory more than your people did. They were willing to do anything to keep your people from winning."

Canderous pondered over my words. "You know, Old Man, you're right. I was there at that last battle and Revan fought like a demon possessed. He was willing to sacrifice all, even his own soldiers and his fellow Jedi to gain his objective. I began to wonder if he was even human after that final battle. Anyway enough talk over old battles and old wounds. Perhaps one of these days...I'll reclaim my wife and return to my clan, but I must have a victory to make up for the failure my clan had during the war. Perhaps that is why I follow Phoenix, somehow I think she holds the key to my honorable and glorious return to my clan."

"You're putting a lot hopes on Phoenix, Canderous. What if she fails and doesn't have that victory you're looking for."

"Then I haven't really lost anything, to begin with. But I don't think she will fail, Jolee. She's a warrior and a warrior wins their battles no matter what the cost. That's why I am with her, so she doesn't fail."

"Like Revan's final battle?"

Canderous nodded. "I would expect no less from a warrior."

"And I take it you want Phoenix to act like Revan?"

"If it means victory then yes, I want her to act like Revan."

I sighed. "Be careful what you ask for, Canderous, you might not like it."

The Mandalorian laughed, "You're amusing, Old Man. Phoenix isn't Revan, and trying to compare her to him dishonors his memory."

I snorted. "You're the one trying to compare Phoenix to Revan. But let's get going or Phoenix is going to yell at us for not being with her to retake Kashyyyk for the wookiees."

We took off and sure enough, we made it to the gates of Rrookworro. The others were waiting for us along with Freyyr and his band of wookiees. Phoenix glared at both of us. "What took you so long? Did you get stuck having to use the little wookiee's room or something?"

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

I laughed at Phoenix. "No, daughter. I was having a conversation with Jolee about your skills as a warrior."

She shook her head. "I see...and I can have one too about becoming distracted and letting arrogance getting the better of you. Shame on you, Canderous, you know better."

I raised an eyebrow. "What about Jolee, are you planning on scolding him as well?"

She grinned. "Nope, he's entitled to get forgetful. He's old and senile...you, on the other hand, have no excuse for it."

Jolee suddenly snorted. "Oh, I get it. Let's play with the old man's head, is it? He's half-senile, he'll forget I said anything!"

She rolled her eyes. "Nice try at deflection, Old Man."

Jolee paused then said hesitantly, "Wait...uhh...what was this about, anyway?"

Phoenix sighed and shook her head, I think she wasn't sure if she believed Jolee was actually senile or if he was joking with her. She seemed to take the matter seriously just in case it wasn't a joke. "We have Czerka trapped, Jolee. Bastila is here and we need to rescue, Zaalbar and his mate. So let's get on with this. For….Kashyyyk and the wookiees!"

The Force rumbled, and I could physically feel it from Phoenix. For not being aware of the Force, to actually feel it from her was a testament to her power and strength. She was like a powerful driven storm and the gates suddenly wrenched open violently.

The wookiees let out a mighty roar and drove forward seemingly possessed with the desire to dethrone Chuundar from his place as chieftain. Of course, that had to be Bastila's doing. The Jedi princess was impressive, I had to give her credit for that. True, she was a bit naive, then there was the fact that I knew she and Phoenix had fracked each other. But it seemed that Phoenix was driven towards messy romances so it wasn't all the Jedi Princess' fault either.

Juhani hissed and cried out as she ignited her lightsaber, "I will be your doom!"

And then there was the Wild Cat, as if Phoenix wasn't totally fracked up in the head, Juhani was pretty bad off as well. I wasn't sure if the cathar was one step towards Jedi sainthood or one step towards falling off a cliff with her volatile nature.

She took off with the wookiees, lightsaber blazing and a fiery look in her eyes. She seemed to be enjoying the combat a bit more than she should, for a Jedi that is. She sliced through Czerka guards and rampaging wookiees without as much as a blink of her eye. I bet when we got back to the ship, Juhani would moan that she shouldn't have been that...gun-ho against Czerka. I just wished she'd make up her damn mind about what kind of Jedi she was. I decided what the hell, I covered her as well as Phoenix firing my blaster and keeping any potential Czerka or Chuundar loyalists out of her way. Yet, Phoenix really didn't need it. She was one hell of a lightsaber duelist. She swept down opponents like a fiend. Carth was busy keeping her covered. Plus he had Jordo by his side. Finally, there was that HK droid and it seemed driven towards keeping Phoenix safe as well. Yet, I lived for combat like this and this was so much better than any enforcement job with Davik.

The old Jedi man wasn't half bad either, he fought but he seemed to be edging closer and closer to some massive looking building. I slowly made my way as I took down Czerka guards and deranged wookiees that fought against each other. Freyyr growled and slammed his hands against the door.

I reached Jolee. "What is this place?"

"It's the wookiee center of leadership, Canderous. They call it their chieftain's hall. I was there once before except with Freyyr. He wanted to see if I was real or not and not some god. He gave me a swat...knocked me out cold for days."

I laughed. "I see, Old Man. Guess Freyyr wants his leadership back."

I heard a beep and my jaw dropped, son of a...it was that little astromech droid. How the hell did that droid get here without being smashed down into who knows what? It beeped and warbled and went right over to Phoenix.

Phoenix shook her head. "Do I even want to know how you managed to get here, T3?"

The droid beeped and HK-47 responded, Statement: Answer the question, Tin Can. The master asked a question and she needs an answer.

The droid beeped and Phoenix suddenly laughed. "Alright...I promise I'll take you with me for the next Star Map. Do me a favor, T3 and open this damn door."

The droid managed to take out a saw like attachment from the various attachments he held and began to saw away at the door's hinges. The door came open with a loud thud as it hit the floor and a blaster bolt hit the poor little droid head on. The droid let out a wild squawk and went dead.

I felt sorry for the astromech. He had the heart of a combat droid but was geared towards slicing, security, and repair, to be taken down in one lucky shot was bad timing. Maybe if I felt up to it, I'd work on installing some combat level upgrades on the damn thing. He deserved to be combat ready if it was that driven to come here to fight. I wasn't a tech but I knew enough in order to work on my Basilisk war droid and if T3 was going to be a fighter he needed to be much more than just target practice.

Phoenix stepped in and the next blaster bolt was deflected into its shooter and a wookiee cried out in pain as it was wounded. It charged after her and promptly had its arm amputated on the spot. Phoenix glared at the wookiee. "Surrender. I don't want to..."

The wookiee refused to yield and charged at her with its remaining arm. Phoenix sighed as she flung her double-bladed lightsaber at the wookiee's head and the poor wook ended up decapitated. She sighed and shook her head as her blade returned to her grip.

Blaster fire came from the Chieftain hall and I caught sight of the yellow uniforms of Czerka guards. Freyyr and his bunch went storming in. Yea, let the wookiees take the brunt of Czerka's firepower. Some avoided the blaster fire but others ended up dying in the very hall that they swore they would take back for Freyyr. Something about this reminded me about clan honor, true wookiees were a bit primitive but something about fighting for their clan resonated with me. These wookiees deserved a bit more credit than I had originally thought. They were warriors and their sense of community made me miss my own clan. It began to make sense why Jagi and the others came here to hunt wookiees, the wookiee ideal of honor, clan, and being warriors all appealed to my people.

"WE NEED TO FIND BASTILA, ZAALBAR, AND WRRLJIYKAM." Phoenix yelled out.

I recognized Grrwahrr and he rushed past the mad frenzy and opened a door to a closet releasing Zaalbar, his mate, and Bastila. He handed Bastila her lightsaber, and she ignited her double-blade and went into combat.

I lay down cover fire for the rest of the wookiees as they attacked and ripped to shreds the Czerka guards. Juhani also glared at them and hissed showing very pointed cathar teeth. Between the wookiees and Juhani, the guards finally panicked and fled for their lives. I smirked, I guess they decided that this planet and its 'resources' weren't worth their lives. With the Czerka guards gone, the only 'outsiders' left were us and the wookiees were now fighting for a change in leadership.

Phoenix suddenly yelled out. "STOP…THERE HAS BEEN ENOUGH BLOOD."

The wookiees all in the process of fighting either for Freyyr or Chuundar stopped. Chunndar growled out, "Give me one good reason why an outsider should demand we stop fighting?"

She handed Freyyr, Bacca's blade. "This blade belongs to the true chieftain of your clan."

Chuundar laughed in an annoying sort of wookiee chuckle. "But I have the hilt. This proves nothing."

Freyyr growled out. "It proves everything. Our prophecies from our shaman, Ciiraddikova has stated the blade will be found by an outsider who will give salvation or damnation to our clan. Here is the Outsider, and she has given me the blade. She has named me as chieftain, my son. So step down, and my judgment on you will not be as harsh as it was upon Zaalbar."

Chuundar suddenly growled. "Not if I take the blade from you first!"

He suddenly lunged at his father and the two fought viciously for the blade. They fought vibroblade to vibroblade. Father and son traded blows and growled saying they would see the other dead first. Phoenix was about to step in but Jolee stopped her. "Hold off kid, this is something that these two must settle up on their own."

Phoenix started to protest but Jolee sighed. "This is a clan matter, you've done your job, Phoenix. Let the wookiees settle it out their own way."

Bastila nodded, "The old man is right, we shouldn't interfere in this and let whatever prophecy that has been given play itself out."

Juhani nodded. "I agree, it is very tempting to lash out. However, Master Quatra would say that this is a clan affair and the members of this clan should settle their own affairs."

Phoenix continued her plea. "But...somehow I am part of this prophecy. I am the Outsider and...I am supposed to bring salvation or damnation to this clan."

Bastila then added, "And what does that exactly mean, Phoenix? Do you know? You may have already brought salvation or damnation to this clan already. The will of the Force isn't always clear and acting too soon or rashly can make things even worse."

Phoenix glared at Bastila and said, "Inaction can be just as bad, Bastila. It was inaction that caused the Mandalorians to nearly conquer the galaxy."

Bastila folded her arms and stated,"And it was rashness that caused Revan and Malak to turn to the Dark Side."

Jolee chuckled and then said firmly, "What if you're both right?

Phoenix looked thoughtful and then grinned. "You know something, Jolee, you could also be right on that."

I laughed. Jedi and their infernal internalization and philosophizing. "It's times like these that make me wonder how the Jedi and the Republic won against my people in the first place. If it wasn't for someone like Revan my people would have..."

Bastila glared at me. "Enough, Mandalorian! I have heard enough about how great and wonderful Revan was and I will tolerate it no longer."

Apparently, the Jedi Princess had grown a backbone. "Or what, Princess?"

Bastila was quiet, and I saw her hands tighten around her lightsaber. Hmm...would she actually lash out at me?

Phoenix frowned. "Bastila...he wants you to act. That's Mandalorians for you." Bastila sighed and then her hands relaxed from her lightsaber.

I snorted. Pathetic, if Bastila was going to use threats she really ought to act on them. "I still stand by my statement, Bastila."

* * *

 **~Zaalbar ~**

My father growled as he was wounded by Chuundar's blade. I moaned and glared at my friends. "If you won't do something then I will!"

I lifted up my bowcaster and aimed it at Chuundar. "Forgive me brother…"

"Brother...please...I will make you a co-chieftain. The sons of Freyyr will rule together. We will make our clan strong."

"At what cost, brother? The blood of our people as slaves. No, this must end!"

I fired my bowcaster at him. The blaster bolt went straight into Chuundar's head. Chuundar moaned and fell to the ground.

Tears formed in my eyes. I never wanted to kill my brother. "Chuundar…my brother...I still...love you."

Chuundar moaned, "I meant it brother...we would have ruled together...but...I fear our future. You and father have made us weak. Now, we will never be strong against outsider threats."

I shook my head. "No, brother...you have weakened us. Selling our people weakens us. Our clan becomes weak, and our people who have been sold have been cut off from our home have no claim to the great wroshyr trees of our home. That is what makes us strong, brother. I...I wish you could understand that."

Chuundar took a deep labored breath and then was silent as the Shadowlands claimed his life.

I let out a deep forlorn cry at the death of my brother. I could not be happy my brother was dead.

Freyyr, my father shook my head at me, he seemed to be displeased at the fact that I was morose about the death of my brother. My father growled, "The usurper is dead." He picked up the hilt that lay strung on a cord from Chuundar's neck. "Let the blade and the hilt become one."

I let out a heartfelt sigh. "Father...may I ask you something?"

My father looked at me and said. "You are my heir, Zaalbar. You will be the next chieftain when I go on to the Shadowlands. What you ask of me, you may have. I welcome you back into our clan."

Phoenix Star came over to me and my father barked at her. "You have done a wonderful thing, Outsider. You have brought my son back home to me. How can I repay you for your…"

I suddenly barked out, "Father...I want the Blade of Bacca."

Phoenix Star looked thoughtful for a moment and then spoke,"I think...that's fitting actually, considering I didn't do much to free you except give you the blade in the first place."

I barked out,"How can you say that, Phoenix Star? You helped to restore me to my father and my clan. And you won't take any reward for it?"

Phoenix sighed. "My reward would be you should stay with your father, and your intended and help re-establish order among your clan."

"But...my lifedebt! I can't abandon you, Phoenix Star. Tradition dictates I must stay with you."

"Zaalbar! Your people's tradition dictates you should stay with your father and prepare to be the next chieftain."

My father barked and shook his head. "My son should stay with you, Phoenix Star. I refuse to let my son break his oath to you. He has sworn a lifedebt to you. I release you, Zaalbar from your responsibility to me. Now, my son, we have other things to talk about. I think it's time that you and Wrrljiykam and you were officially made mates."

I barked. "But...if I am to go with..."

My father held up his paw and stated, "And Wrrljiyakm and you need to start a family so at least when you leave, I know you will have an heir and..."

Phoenix Star suddenly grinned. "And your father has a grandchild to rear as the next chieftain."

I nodded. It made sense but...this seemed rather quick after my brother's death. I protested. "But Chuundar's death! And now a quick marriage between Wrrljiykam and me. It strains at tradition."

My father snorted. "That...foul usurper's body will be placed in the Shadowlands where he can rot. My son, we need a good omen. You and Wrrljiykam's marriage will strengthen our clan and bring new life and sweetness to the bitterness that Chuundar left us with.

Wrrljiykam came over to me, she grasped my paw. It had been so long since I had considered my intended mate. My father barked. "I will give you Bacca's sword as a gift for your marriage."

Phoenix Star sighed. "I am sorry I have to drag you away from your home after all this, Zaalbar. I'd really wish you'd reconsider your lifedebt to me. You..." She paused."You could have a life here, a mate, a family, and all I can offer you is...conflict and probably your own death."

Phoenix Star's countenance suddenly seemed heavy and sad. Her shoulders slumped and it seemed as though the weight of a heavy burden lay on her very delicate shoulders. I said to her, "But what sort of wookiee would I be if I left that burden of conflict and death all to you, Phoenix Star. My life is secondary, it has been ever since you saved my life back on Taris. I will stay here and fulfill my obligations to my father and Wrrljiykam and then I will leave with you."

* * *

A/N: And wow...this took a lot of time to write. I honestly struggle writing combat scenes and I hope that this was enough combat and didn't feel too rushed and it was a decent wookiee rebellion. I debated adding a Juhani POV but looking over and over this chapter. I just couldn't find where to fit it in so tried to fit her in...in other places. I also debated putting in happy celebratory wookiee scene but with the mood of this chapter, it just didn't feel like it would have worked.

Anyway, next chapter will be a tie-up of loose ends and leaving Kashyyyk and I am looking forward to it because I have lots of things planned for the next few chapters.

Thanks go to all my reviewers. I really honestly appreciate the comments, suggestions, and well…fan service. lol


	72. Chapter 71: Kashyyyk: Vows

**Chapter 71: Kashyyyk: Vows**

 **~Zaalbar~**

For me and Wrrljiykam, the ceremony of our love was a simple one. Wookiee tradition made such a thing very quiet and private. Wrrljiykam and I climbed a wroshyr tree, one that our clan had set apart for such things and we gave our vows in private. When we climbed down, we would be mates. I looked at Wrrljiykam and barked at her. "I vow I will be your mate, Wrrljiykam. I will protect you if I learn danger comes to you. I will honor and respect you. I will listen to your words for you are truly an honorable wook whose words echo wisdom. As long as the trees of Kashyyyk grow, I will be your mate."

Wrrljiykam responded, "Zaalbar, I accept being your mate and I will honor you and respect you. I will help lead our clan in your absence. I will rear our cub, be it son or daughter to respect the ways of our clan. I will teach them to be wise and avoid the pitfalls of our past.

With our vows said, we both climbed down from the tree and started our life as mates. Rwookrrorro exploded into loud music and revelry. Phoenix Star smiled at me and then she lifted a skin that was filled with what I could smell was cortyg brandy. I chuckled to myself, I think she was intoxicated. I wasn't sure, but she seemed a bit off her feet and she swayed as she spoke. "A toast to the happy couple. May they have lots of children and their children have children."

Her toast was filled with lots of roars and affirmations to me and Wrrljiykam. My father brought to me the Sword of Bacca and handed it to me. I spoke, "May I be worthy of this sword, father and may it bring honor and glory to our clan."

We were ushered to a large banquet table filled with food, and we began to eat. Wrrljiykam barked at me. "Zaalbar...don't eat too much...save some for the others."

"But I am hungry…"

She shook her head and Phoenix Star laughed. "Lay off of him, Whirl. He's going off with me, and the food dispenser is awful. T3 still hasn't managed to fix it properly."

The droid beeped an annoyed response that I could not understand.

Phoenix Star shook her head. "Maybe I ought to use some of your spare parts to fix it then."

T3 gave a dismal sound and Phoenix Star laughed. "I am joking, T3."

Wrrl sighed. "You do not know him, Phoenix Star. He will stay here and eat the very last crumb of wastril bread."

Phoenix Star chuckled. "Let him be...it's not like it's every day he gets to be married."

I nodded in agreement with Phoenix Star. "But it's my celebration and if I want to eat the last bit of wastril bread I will."

Wrrljiykam barked back. "But it's bad manners to eat up ALL the food and leave none for our guests."

I snorted in response. "I do not eat up ALL the food."

Wrrljiykam suddenly laughed but did not reply to my retort. She then nestled her head against me, and I carefully stroked her fur. It was soft, warm, and delicate. I nestled against her and breathed in her warm scent. It took me back to my earliest memories with her. Our fathers had agreed that as we were cubs that we would be mates. Wrrl belonged to another clan and our fathers thought it was wise that our blood be united together. Wrrl was the youngest, and the oldest was to be Chuundar's mate. However, Chuundar's mate, Kitlowan was killed and wrrl would have been too if she had not been visiting my clan. For I had been furious at my father, he had coerced me into a marriage I did not want. Wrrl had been invited by my father to get me to accept the marriage contract. I had vowed I did not want it because I did not know Wrrl. However, later on, Wrrl's whole clan was wiped out by a deranged wookiee who became a madclaw. Wrrl refused to disclose his name but said he had an unhealthy preoccupation with the darkness of the Shadowlands. My father welcomed Wrrl as part of our clan and our clan mourned the loss of Wrrl's clan. I remembered as a young cub when Wrrl cried out in deep mourning over the loss of her father and her older sister, Kitlowan. I mourned with her and in her mourning, we found a profound connection with each other. Sadness and hardship had brought love, and remembering that hardship Wrrl had had I knew our marriage was right.

I thought that that future had been taken away from me. Yet, Phoenix Star had brought me home and reunion with my mate and my father had all been accomplished. Perhaps there was more to the magic that Phoenix Star wielded that she called the Force. Did the Force favor Phoenix Star? As Wrrl and I seemed to enjoy this peaceful intimate moment, I knew the answer. It seemed to favor her and anyone that was with her.

It was going to be a long night, and I knew that after this party and my time with my mate that I would be going off with Phoenix Star. I ached within my heart to leave my precious Wrrljiykam. I had a feeling it might be a long time before I saw her again. There was also an errant thought that I might not see her again. Was that why Phoenix Star wanted me to stay home with Wrrl?

* * *

 **~Carth~**

As much as I wanted to celebrate with the others for Zaalbar's wedding, I just didn't feel like it. It was apparent something was bothering Phoenix and although she put on a good front for Zaalbar. I could tell she was troubled. How could I tell? Well, Phoenix had the bad habit of getting drunk every time something went wrong or bothered her. Plus there was the fact she had promised me back on Tatooine that she had sworn off drinking. I sighed and shook my head. I had been so proud of her giving up liquor and being more disciplined. I was more concerned about her than being a part of this celebration. Sure, I tried to be a good guest. I ate food that was offered to me and drank a little of the native brew. Everyone was huddled around Phoenix because she was an honored guest among the wookiees. She had brought the blade of Bacca and the wookiees gave our Jedi guests a special place to sit and eat. Meanwhile us, non-Force using allies sat at another table.

Even Mission and Jordo noticed my lack of a celebratory spirit. Mission smiled at me. "Hey, old geez what's the matter? You should be enjoying this. I mean it's not every day that Big Z gets married, you know."

If I hadn't been so bothered about Phoenix, I probably would have been upset at Mission calling me 'old geez'. She must have noticed me staring at Phoenix, and she then grinned. "You know...Nix will probably cheer right up if you sweep her off her feet or something, seeing how you're a romantic guy and all."

"And how do you know I am even thinking about her?"

Mission rolled her eyes. "Come on, Carth. You've had that lovesick worried look since Dantooine."

Canderous laughed. "Carth, you need to eat and try and appreciate this party. That swill back on the Hawk really does leave a lot to be desired. At least the food is fresh and isn't that slop from the food dispenser.

I smiled blandly trying to be polite to Canderous but really I had a lot on my mind, I was also anxious about my son. This celebration had its own merits but I couldn't really celebrate when my son was being trained as a Sith and Phoenix clearly had something bothering her.

Jordo laughed. He clearly wasn't troubled, and he was drinking quite a bit of the native brew and if he wasn't drunk yet. He would be. "You know take it from me, old friend. You need to settle down and marry her."

I chuckled halfheartedly. "Sure, just as soon as she ends up killing Malak."

Jordo nearly spat out his drink. "What! You're joking, right?"

I shook my head. "I wish I was, but I am not. I think...she's still worried she's going to end up dead."

Jordo stated, "I can't exactly blame her. I mean...look what happened to Telos."

"I know! I already lost Morgana and to hell with it, I am not going to lose Phoenix or my son either."I sighed."And I...I don't feel like talking anymore about this and we need to get moving. I don't like mentioning it but the way Phoenix is going she's going to be passed out before we even leave. I am going to go back and prep the ship for our departure. I don't know a lot about wookiee celebrations but I have a feeling this thing could last for hours or days."

Mission glanced at me. "You're such a party pooper, Carth."

"I don't feel like celebrating, Mission. The more time we spend here… I am sorry but there are things that are so much more important. Give my regards to Zaalbar, Mission."

I got up and left.

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

"Take it easy, kid, that cortyg brandy packs quite a punch and it's supposed to be a milder version of it."

Revan snorted, her words slurred together. "I am okay…Old Man. Go bother the wookiees."

Bastila nodded at my words and spoke to Revan. "Jolee is right, Phoenix and you're drunk. I thought your training with the Order would make..."

"What reform me into a proper respectable Jedi? Don't make me laugh. In the end, all I am is a smuggler that has the Force and was made to train as a Jedi. Never mind the fact that I am probably going to die when this mission meets its completion. If I am going to die, I might as well...drink and celebrate that Czerka's tyranny is over and that Zaalbar can at least find some semblance of happiness before we leave."

I sighed and put a hand on Revan's shoulder. "Hey, it's your life, kid. But don't say I didn't warn you. That brandy will give you a massive hangover afterward."

Bastila shook her head. "And there's a deeper reason for your disgusting behavior. I can sense it. We do have our bond."

Revan snorted and then said in a half-drunken voice, "Yea...so you keep reminding me of that filthy disgusting bond. I hate this damn bond. You sicken me, Bastila. I want a life of my own and I am tethered to you. You have ruined this party for me, you and your damn puritanical Jedi ways. Go frack yourself!"

Revan got up, grabbed a full wineskin with the brandy and opened it up. She took a deep gulp of the Spirits with a defiant look at Bastila. She motioned for her two droids and off they went.

I sighed and looked at Bastila. "That was about as helpful as telling her to go jab herself with a bothan stunner."

"What am I going to do with her, Jolee?"

I rolled my eyes. "Let her cool down and sleep off the brandy, of course. You have as much tact with her as someone trying to tame a wild rancor."

Juhani nodded. "Jolee is correct, Bastila. It is evident that Phoenix has a lot on her mind. Let her be. If she finds some semblance of peace in this celebration then it is not right to deny that to her. This mission is hard enough without you lecturing her about how she should act as a Jedi."

Bastila shook her head. "I wish I could...but overall I can't."

I shook my head. "Then you're like a kid that has a healing scab, Bastila. They keep picking at it and letting it bleed so that it never heals. You want her to sort out whatever issue she has, then let her be. She's done alright as much as I can see. Anyway, this old man is bushed, I am going to settle down in this ship of yours and take a bit of a nap. These wookiee celebrations can go on for days if you let it. I am not as young as I use to be and these parties end up wearing me out."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

It had been a party to remember with Zaalbar's wedding and I stumbled back to the Hawk tipsy from the grog that the wookiees offered to the crew in celebration of Zaalbar's wedding and our victory over Czerka. Damn Bastila, I got so sick of her harping at me at every trivial thing.

Of course, there was more to my drinking, but it all stemmed from that meeting with that shape-shifting alien. Meeting with him or her convinced me that my memory had a very large gap in it. It all started back with me meeting that damn rodian, Grava Twiva back on Tatooine. He had said I had met with Calo Nord before and that he had sold me out both times because I had not paid for the weapons I had taken from him. I had really not given too much thought over my lack of memory. I guess because with all that had happened on Tatooine I had been distracted. Now...with a second individual saying I knew them and they knew me...I couldn't honestly ignore it. Something was up and was wrong.

I began to piece together from the conversations I had that I had probably sold weapons to 'Eli' and Calo. They both were probably in on it as well. A bounty hunter and an assassin are pretty much thicker than flies as they both can dish out death. Somehow the deal had gone bad, and Calo attacked me. After that, I honestly had no memory and somehow Darth Revan had attached herself to me from her infernal holocron. All this was, of course, surmising and piecing together what bits I knew.

There was also the possibility that I was an assassin, planning to be an assassin, or at least had some dealings with assassins seeing how 'Eli' said his resources were available to me. I was thoroughly disgusted with the fact that I might have been an assassin, but then that could be how I ended up learning Echani martial arts, aside from the whole I read it out of a book thing that Canderous didn't buy. It made a lot of sense actually. But then my cousin, according to Grava saved me. Seeing how my memory was damaged, Sorran Naberrie probably didn't want me to get back in touch with 'Eli.'Being an assassin was a dangerous life, and it thoroughly disgusted me that I had considered that path. However, I had been struggling with my smuggling operations and perhaps decided that turning into a hired killer probably paid more.

I heard footsteps and grew cautious. I pulled out my lightsaber and HK-47 announced, Statement: Master, it's just that old meatbag fart.

Oh. I felt kind of dense, alcohol sort of muddled the Force or made me forget I had the Force to help me out. I suddenly grinned and pulled out my lightsaber blades and ignited them. "Jolee… it does no good to sneak up on me."

"Are you sure you want to fight me, kid. The way you're stumbling around, you're likely to slice off a hand or a foot."

I laughed. "That's true, Old Man."

I extinguished my blades. I nearly stumbled as I came towards him. He came forward and leaned against me because I did feel like I was going to fall flat on my ass.

"Kid, you need to pull yourself together. I know you're better than this."

"Maybe I don't want to. Maybe..."I paused."Maybe I am weary of being a Jedi and I am tired of this mission. I didn't fracking ask for this, Jolee. Contrary to what happened here on Kashyyyk I am no fracking hero. I am not a military leader and don't want to be one."

Jolee scratched his beard. "You can't escape your destiny, Phoenix. And there have been plenty of Jedi who tried to. Nomi Sunrider, for example. Now she tried to escape her future and her destiny and...she got pulled into it regardless. You can't run away from who and what you are, Phoenix."

I suddenly barked at him, "Why can't I, Old Man? I just...I want to run away from this whole damn thing."

"And here I thought you were a lot tougher than I gave credit or is that the brandy talking? Look, kid, I spent twenty years here hiding away from the galaxy. Let's say you get your wish and you crash on a planet with a bunch of indigenous carpetbags."

I raised an eyebrow. "You crashed here?"

"Hush! Who's talking here? Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, you do everything you can to avoid everyone and everything. You think...well, you think you can escape whatever the Force wants from you and then suddenly some young punk kid comes into your backyard. You're not dumb. You can see this kid has a future, a destiny and you feel pulled to follow them because that's what the Force wants from you. Then they act stupid, drink a whole lot of a brandy and..."

"What! You want me to go face Malak? You want me to die!"

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

"No, kid but think…do you honestly think Malak is going to leave you alone? You run...and he'll hunt you down."

"But why, Jolee? Am I really all that important?"

"Look, Phoenix. Malak is a tyrant who should be stopped. If he conquers the galaxy, we're in for a couple of rough centuries. You're the only person I've seen that has enough pluck to go after him. You're the only person who Malak perceives as a threat. Do you really want the galaxy to be under Malak's thumb?"

Revan paused in thought, she looked torn in her desire to help the galaxy and her own personal wants and desires.

"Look, Jolee as great as this conversation is. You don't understand what I am going through."

"I understand you want to run and hide and yea, that may be great now, but someday you'll realize it was a mistake."

"Damn it, Old Man…I have a damn gap in part of my memories, and I think…" Revan sighed. "What if I am far more dangerous than I realized. And you want me to fight Malak?! Go away…leave me alone!"

Revan's eyes flashed a familiar look of defiance. I had seen that look in her eyes before when she had come to recruit me. She took a gulp of the brandy from the skin and trudged off. I sighed, so that was it, Revan or rather Phoenix had come to the realization that she could be dangerous and the idea frightened her. It made sense in the fact that instead of relying on the strength that I knew she had as Revan, due to recent events here, she had retreated back into the smuggler's persona that the damn Order had placed in her mind. It explained the drinking and the wanting to run away from her destiny.

Poor Revan, she was split into two. The person she truly was and the fake personality the Jedi had given her. Although I should be glad she had come to the realization that she could potentially be dangerous to this whole mission. I couldn't help but feel some degree of similarity to her desire to escape from whatever fate the Force had for her. I think she knew she couldn't escape it and that is what made her storm off in anger.

Yet, it was time to set foot in my new environment. The Ebon Hawk. Hmm...seemed like a decent enough ship. I step aboard and looked around. I needed a nap. I found a comfortable bed in the medical ward of the ship. I plopped my bag down and decided to make myself at home as I plopped myself down onto the bed.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I walked into the Hawk. I knew Carth was here as well, I could sense him.

I walked into the cockpit to check on Carth. Carth scowled as he glanced at me and took in my drunken appearance. "I thought you said you had given up drinking, Phoenix!"

I laughed. "I lied." I took a hearty swig from the neck of the bag. "I am not _that_ drunk," I said rather unconvincingly and stumbled into Carth's arms. He shook his head. "Honestly, Phoenix. I am not sure if I really know you. I thought I did, but one moment you vow to keep yourself sober and now you're acting like the woman I first met back on the Endar Spire. Does this have to deal with what happened earlier when you didn't want to really talk about it?"

I took a long pause and tried to gather my thoughts; the alcohol made it hard to concentrate but I finally figured out what I wanted to say. "Remember when I stormed out on Tatooine and ended up running into that damn rodian. I found out that he sold me out to Calo Nord before. I have not one single memory of it. Then here...I ran into some strange shape-shifting alien...who claimed he was an assassin and...that I could count on his resources. He acted like I knew him somewhere in my past. But I have no fracking memory of it, Carth. I think I might have been an assassin or dealt with assassins. I've got a serious problem here and it fracking scares the shit out of me."

Carth shook his head negatively. "Why do you think you might have been an assassin, Phoenix?"

"I…know Echani martial arts for one, Carth. Yea...I did read some texts but Canderous is right many martial arts require practice and there are only so many books one can read. Practical application is kind of needed for that sort of thing. Then there is the fact that... the hutts confiscated my ship. I was pretty desperate for money, Carth. It's possible that my weapons smuggling skill transferred to other skills. And...

"Yea...but you stink at handling a blaster rifle, Phoenix."

"But I finished Bendak with a hold-out blaster. A weapon that an assassin can handle at close range. And that damn rodian said that I was left for dead by Calo Nord. Mission said he has killed so many people. Skills that an assassin would be able to use and...the rodian stated that my cousin saved my sorry ass. There still are so many things that I am still trying to figure out on this, but I have no fracking memory of any of that, Carth."

"Is it possible that that rodian could have been lying, Phoenix?"

"Possibly, but that shape-shifting alien I met…I don't think he was lying, Carth."

I turned to leave. I wanted to drink more of the brandy. I wanted to try and drown out the chilling concepts that were in my mind. However, Carth suddenly grabbed and held onto me. "I am probably crazy...but...I love you, Phoenix. I don't care about your past."

I shook my head. "But...I could have killed people, Carth. I could have done terrible things and...I have no memory of it. Doesn't that bother you?"

"You could have. It doesn't mean you have, Phoenix. Everything you've said is all based on wild assumptions. It's a fragile house of pazaak cards and I am not going to believe any of what you told me because you're letting a meeting with some strange alien let your imagination run wild."

I sighed and took another gulp of the brandy. Carth frowned. "Is that why you're drinking, my little Raven? You're worried you might be an assassin or dealt with assassins?"

"I can't brush off the feeling that something is wrong with me, Carth. It's not normal to have a gap in one's memory. And I still think that…being an assassin is a logical assessment."

He shook his head. "Damn it, Phoenix it's not logical. You couldn't even shoot a Black Vulker back on Taris. You're not an assassin! Get that thought out of your damn head!"

Carth did have a point. I was a lousy shot with a blaster. "But my memories, Carth!"

He sighed, and he grasped my head with his hands and then touched his head toward my own. "I love you, Phoenix, don't forget that. Isn't that a memory that you are certain of and that you know you have?"

I sighed. "Republic...I am weary. It's unsettling to know I am missing something from my memory somehow. But for your sake...I'll try and let it go."

He rubbed my hand. "That's all I ask, my little Blackbird."

I handed him the skin with the brandy in it. He smiled and then opened up the skin and took a pull of the liquor. He coughed from the strong liquid.

I raised an eyebrow. "Wait a minute...I thought you didn't approve of drinking."

He smiled and coughed and said in a hoarse voice, "I don't...but I don't want you to finish this off all on your own and end up a lot worse off than you already are."

I suddenly laughed a hearty laugh. "In other words, you want to end up just as wasted as I am."

Carth rolled his eyes. "Maybe...but I am willing to do anything to get you to forget all this nonsense that you just spouted and I am willing to get drunk right alongside you."

"Republic...you're twisted. A lot more twisted than I realized."

"Well let it never be said that Carth Onasi isn't willing to do things, even foolish random things for the one he loves."

He took another drink from the skin and coughed.

I smirked. "Take it easy, Republic. I can tell strong drinks aren't your specialty."

"That…that is an understatement."

I took the skin and took a drink from it. "Remember I grew up on a vineyard and winery. Alcohol was kind of my life for most of it."

Carth chuckled and scooped me up into his arms.

"Carth..Put me down."

"Nope. Not a chance. Mission said something about sweeping you off your feet…and..."I laughed and he said,"I've got you all to myself, you're drunk. I am getting drunk and..."

A wild look was in his eyes and he laughed as he carried me off to his room.

"Are we going to play Pazaak, Nar Shadda rules?"

Carth laughed. "Hmm, maybe…"

"I'd win…Republic. I have the Force after all."

"I realize that, Phoenix. But are you willing to lose...on purpose?"

He took the bottle of brandy from me and took a swig.

"I suppose I could lose...at least this once. Just for you, Republic."

He smiled as he deposited me down on his bunk and he said calmly. "I love you, Phoenix Star. No matter what you have done in your past."His hands went towards my clothing and my hands towards his. He was right because I may have had a gap in my memories but the memory of his love, at this moment, it was all that mattered. He laughed as he took a sip of the brandy then pressed into me. I groaned. He stopped and handed me the brandy. I took a sip and handed it back to him. He took a sip and then pressed into me and...more brandy by him and me. We both were laughing after a while. Damn, we were both out of our heads drunk while making love to each other and enjoying every moment of it.

 **~o0o~**

 **Hours later…**

Frack, my head felt like it had been stomped by a ronto. A groan next to me and I found Carth groaning too. He clasped hard against my waist as if he was struggling to get up and using my body as leverage to get up. "Let's not do that again…Phoenix. It might have been fun in the heat of the moment but...my head feels like…it's going to pop."

We both struggled to get up and get dressed and went to the kitchen area to grab some caff. I heard a light chuckle and saw Jolee. "No offense, but you two look like hell."

"Shut up…Old Man. My head feels like crap."

"Don't say I didn't warn you, kid. Anyway, What's the gunk that comes out of the synthesizer on this bucket, anyway? Do you never clean the darned thing?"

He put a dish of unappetizing gray stuff in the kitchen fresher.

"You didn't have to come, Old Man."

"No, I didn't...but at any rate, I already told you why I wanted to leave. I've seen everything I wanted to on Kashyyyk. Time to go, time to move on."

"I don't believe you."

"The hermit says he's tired of living alone in the giant forest and you find that hard to believe? How cynical are you?"

I managed to grab a cup of caff and handed one to Carth. "I find it odd that an old man like you…spent twenty years in the Shadowlands and now you want to leave. Sorry, I just find it…a bit unusual. You being here is...well convenient. And you knew where that damn map was as well."

I took a sip of the caff and let its dark bitter flavor fill my mouth.

Carth sat down and groaned. Jolee shook his head. "So you took Carth down your debauched path of drunkenness as well."

I grinned, although grinning made the muscles in my face hurt. Damn this hangover. "He didn't exactly need that much persuasion. People get drunk for the ones they love." I said that last statement with a brief haughty laugh but then flinched in pain. The laughter made my headache.

Carth took a sip of the caff and nodded and chuckled lightly with my own statement but then stated,"I agree with Phoenix. You being here does seem convenient."

"Of course you'd agree with her."

"Anyway, Old Man...I expect to know why you came with me."

Jolee sighed and shook his head. "How many kilometer-high trees can you find an interest in before you figure you've had enough? I'd bet you can't be bothered to stay in one room for more than fifteen minutes. And then there are all the critters in the Shadowlands... I'm just happy to have the opportunity to get back in space, doing something new. Is that too much to ask?"

"You could do that on your own, Old Man."

"So I could. Not having a ship does tend to put a damper on that kind of idea, however... I'll admit... for all its flaws, Kashyyyk was home enough. But I am here because...well I said it before...your destiny."

"My destiny...frack! Here we go again about my destiny. What interest do you have in my future?"

"Well, kid your destiny is unclear and I am quite content to let you make your own mistakes. Just because I want to see where this ends up doesn't mean I need to tell you how to get there."

"I want another drink!" I threw the mug down into the fresher and it broke and shattered.

Carth coughed. "Phoenix!"

"Look, no more about some nebulous future I have. I am a person, and I am not a subject to be watched, Jolee. I don't like it, you're as fracking bad as Bastila. She watches me as well. What am I, some sort of gizka or bantha in a fracking cage?"

I stormed off in anger, and like my time back on the Endar Spire, the hangover's headache lifted from me. Storming through the Ebon Hawk, I noticed most of the crew had come back. Most of them were passed out. A night of revelry and drinking had probably gotten to them just as it had gotten to me and Carth. Although some of them may have just been up way too long and they came back here to basically sleep. Bastila and Juhani were in deep Force and sleepful meditation in the women's area of the dormitory. I had decided I didn't want to be near Bastila since...our relationship was tense as it was and I had gotten into the habit of sleeping with Carth or making a makeshift bunk in the cargo hold. Zaalbar...well from what I could sense through the Force, he wasn't here. He was probably spending as much time as he could with his mate before we had to leave. He also had to ensure that his mate would have a child. I sighed, a part of me ached inside. I wanted a life, a normal life, no damn crusades against Malak or any other Sith.

My eyes misted over and the Force washed over me. _I was in a fine room with Onderonian silks, a child in my arms, a child with raven colored hair. Her lips moved hungrily. I smiled softly as I put the child to my chest and I felt the child bite at my breast for sustenance. A light knock at the door of the room and Carth walked in. "Hey, gorgeous...how is she doing?"_

" _Hungry. All she does is eat, sleep, and needs a change."_

 _Carth laughed. "Well, that's babies for you."_

 _He lightly stroked her hair, and she fussed in my arms. I shook my head. "Carth, quit pestering her. She has to eat."_

 _He grinned sheepishly. "Can I help it that she's just as gorgeous as her mother?"_

The vision floated away and I sighed, the Force was a tricky thing, I knew it. Things were so delicate, so fragile, like my life. I could die and this vision I had seen might never be. A few tears came down my face and I heard a cough and saw Jolee come beside me.

He took a hesitant breath. "Look, kid…" He bowed his head. "I was never really good at being subtle."

I wiped the tears from my eyes, hoping beyond hope that Jolee didn't notice them. "Damn you, Old Man. If you've come to apologize, get to the fracking point."

"You intrigue me, kid. You should notice that most of the crew is intrigued by you as well. It's not just me."

I turned my thoughts outward towards the crew and nodded. Jolee was right. The crew seemed drawn to me. They hung on me like...well like…the only image I could bring up was a child suckling near its mother's breast. Damn that vision that haunted my brain because now all I could end up picturing was me as a mother figure.

I sighed. "Perhaps I did get a bit worked up. However, I should warn you old man, I don't like the feeling that I am like some sort of creature in a menagerie being watched."

"No, most people don't like that sort of attention. But you, kid, you get it whether you like it or not. It's part of you. Anyway…"

The old man suddenly grinned. "I sort of riled you up on purpose."

"What!" Anger filled me, but Jolee held up a hand. "Hey, it worked, didn't it? You're no longer suffering from that hangover, are you?"

"Why you old damn insufferable…curmudgeon. You…you tricked me. You got me angry because you knew…"

He completed my sentence. "I knew that a little anger would have you end up calling on the Force and...that would purge all that out of you."

I sighed. "I don't think any Jedi would recommend that, Jolee."

He snorted. "I am not a Jedi, Phoenix. And you're right, the masters would never approve of such a method but..they always were a bit stodgy when it came to using the Force. And a little heat of emotion does wonders to clear out poisons and...well hangovers."

My thoughts went back to Revan's spirit instructing me to call upon the Dark Side to clear out the sedative that I had imbibed in my drinks. I raised an eyebrow. "But don't such ways...cause a Jedi to fall to the Dark Side?"

Jolee snorted. "Bah...the Force is the Force, kid. And using it to clear out poisons and drunken headaches isn't going to cause you to become a mass murderer or a tyrant is it?"

I paused in thought and then responded, "No, I suppose not. But...the Force can whisper to you to wield it for destructive and harmful things and that such destructive acts can imbue you with power."

Jolee nodded. "That would be the Dark Side, kid. But...listen here, kid. What you do with the Force defines you as you. You're not a bad kid, Phoenix. Yet, what defines you defines the Force and what defines the Force defines you and your reality."

"Uhh, that made absolutely no sense, Old Man."

"Well, you think about it, kid. Meanwhile, we need to get ready to leave. I know it's hard, but that old fuzzball of yours needs to get a move on. Most of the crew is here...some slightly inebriated or perhaps a few stayed up way too late but they'll get over it."

I chuckled. "Well, last night was a night to get thoroughly trashed."

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

Wrrljiykam nestled against my bed, her arms around my waist. She did not want me to leave. I knew it and I wondered if Phoenix Star may have been right about me staying here. Yet, I was obligated to my Life Debt to her. Wrrl and I had had a night of pleasurable bliss, and she snored loudly.

I nudged her and she moaned. "Please, Zaal…don't go!"

"Wrrl...I made a promise to serve Phoenix Star."

Wrrljiykam sighed. "There is something about that Outsider...although I am grateful for her actions...I don't know what it is but there is a bit of the Shadowlands I saw reflected in her eyes. I...saw that look within the eyes of the Madclaw we banished from my old clan." She paused and then barked, "I worry about you in her company."

I shook my head. "But Phoenix Star saved my life, even though you see the Shadowlands reflected in her eyes, I know she is a good woman. I must go, there is no argument on that."

Wrrl nestled against me one last time. "I know…the Life Debt is the most solemn vow our people can give, but she offered you a way out. Why must you follow her?"

"Because Phoenix Star is a troubled soul, Wrrl. I saw that after that fight with Czerka and this evening with the celebration. If I can help her in any small way through my Life Debt I will."

Wrrljiykam sighed. "You have a caring soul, my Zaal. I think if you hadn't been there for me when my sister, Kitlowan and my father were killed. I would have wished to join them in the Shadowlands as well."

"Don't talk that way, Wrrl. I...I love you. If I hadn't been there and seen your soul in such torment then I would have never have found such love for you. Now surely you must understand why I must go and help Phoenix Star."

Wrrl nodded. "Yes, I suppose you must help draw her soul away from the Shadowlands. But be careful Zaal. We showed mercy to Hanharr, and he still turned on us."

I raised an eyebrow. It was the first time Wrrl mentioned the name of the madclaw that had killed her clan and her family.

She then barked. "I mention his name, Zaalbar because not to mention it grants him far too much power over me and my past. Do not let Phoenix Star draw too much power over you, Zaalbar. Even in her Life Debt, I fear…"

Wrrl sighed. "I fear she will use that Life Debt against you in some way. Czerka has tried to manipulate…"

I growled interrupting her. "Phoenix Star has never shown any sort of manipulation of my Life Debt with her. Don't you ever suggest a thing like that again, Wrrl. Never!"

I got out of my bed with her, and Wrrl shook her head. "Do not be angry with me, my mate. I only wish you to be cautious. Perhaps your Phoenix Star will be alright. Yet, I only say what I noticed. Her eyes reflect the darkness of the Shadowlands."

I looked at Wrrl and saw the seriousness in her features and I sighed. I remembered the others saying that Phoenix had been a Dark Jedi. "You were wise to discern my brother's actions. I suppose I need to heed your wisdom this time as well. I still do not think Phoenix Star will manipulate my Life Debt, but I suppose the possibility remains."

"That is all I ask, Zaal. But take care, and I will give our clan a good strong heir."

I nodded and gathering my belongings and giving one last cuddle and our noses touched in a sign of affection, I left. I trudged heavily down the pathway that the Czerka slavers had built and arrived at the Hawk. I took one last look at my home and entered the ship.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I groaned as I woke up, the party in Rookwoorro had lasted all night long and I had stayed up as long as I could. I stayed till Big Z and Whirl went off to umm…well I guess having little wookiees had to be fun. However, part of me wondered if my relationship with Big Z would be the same. He had a wookiee gal in his life and...I sat up and pondered what now? I suddenly started sniffing and crying. After this was all over, Big Z would go back home and I'd be back by myself. The thought that Big Z would abandon me like my brother had weighed heavily on me.

Someone entered the dormitory area, and I looked up to see Nix. She frowned as she saw the tears still dripping down my face. She looked pretty rough, Nix I mean. She gathered up her Jedi robes, shook her head and sighed. The clothing she wore now was torn and stained. She looked just as bothered as I was.

I looked at her and she looked at me. "Nix...what's the matter?"

"You've been crying, Mish. What's the matter with you?"

"Nix...what's going to happen to me? Now that...Big Z is married. He's going to come back here after…after we're done and…I'll be all alone. I always thought...me and Big Z...best buds forever, y'know. But he's gonna have little Big Z's and…" I felt tears come from my eyes. I didn't think I'd let Nix see the tears. The next thing I knew was Nix hugging me.

"You've been through a lot, Mission. You've lost your home, your brother, and now Zaalbar. Yes, he's still with us but his heart will be with his mate and his home."

Nix let me bury my head in her chest. She stroked my lekku and she said softly. "I've been thinking…" She sighed. "Carth and I plan on getting married but...I want to adopt you. You'd be our daughter."

I lifted my head up. "That would be kind of strange, Nix. I mean...not the adoption but...I don't look at you like a mother, y'know."

Nix chuckled lightly. "Yea, I know...and I don't really consider myself mother material. But there are laws in the Republic, Mish and…well you're an orphan and underage.

I nodded, as much as I hated being called a kid, Nix had a point. "So have you umm...let Carth know?"

Nix laughed. "What do you think, I'd go over his head on this?"

I looked at Nix with a grin. "I know you Nix and yea...you would."

Nix rolled her eyes. "Well…actually…"

I laughed. "I knew it. You haven't told Carth yet."

"Actually I did tell him but I well…I sort of purposed to him in the process."

"Really! I thought it was like... well it's the guy that was supposed to ask the girl to marry him."

Nix shook her head. "Well, I didn't mean to…I just...well, I care about you, Mish. So...asking Carth to adopt you...well...it sort of came out that we both would get married to provide you with a mother and father in your life."

I hugged Nix. "Aww...gee Nix...so you and Carth getting together was to adopt me?"

Nix nodded, and I kissed her on the cheek. "You're the best sister, a twi'lek could ever have."

Nix smiled a warm smile and I then said, "Nix...when you came in you looked troubled...what's wrong?"

Nix shook her head. "Nothing you should be concerned over, Mission."

No, I couldn't let Nix go along denying she had any problems. After all, she helped me accept that I wouldn't be alone in my life. She was trying to keep me from worrying about her but I loved Nix and I meant it when I said she was the best sister I could have.

I looked at her firmly. "Look Nix, let's get one thing straight here. I may be young but you have no right to hide things from me. We're supposed to be like sisters, but how can I be like a sister to you if you won't tell me what's going on with you?"

Nix sighed and looked thoughtful. Something about my words must have gotten through to her, and she spoke, "I don't know Mission. I am..."She paused."I am missing some of my memories, and it's driving me crazy that I don't know...and part of me feels like..." She held up the set of Jedi robes. "Part of me feels like I don't deserve to wear these. What if…" She paused and it was like Nix had something stuck in her throat.

"Your memories, Nix?"

"Long story, Mish. But...I ran into an assassin and…well, it's complicated, but he seemed to know me somehow. Then...well that damn rodian who sold me out to Calo….I think it's interconnected somehow. I think...well I think I might be an assassin, Mish. And if I was an assassin…then I really don't deserve to be wearing these robes."

I suddenly laughed and Nix frowned. "What's so funny! This is serious, Mission."

I shook my head and said. "Nix...you're way, way, way...too soft and tender hearted to be an assassin. I mean yea, you could probably act tough if you had to but...you're too kind to harm someone. I knew people on Taris that could kill people for credits and I am sure you had plenty of opportunities to do so. I mean I am surprised no one convinced you to sell that rakghoul serum to Davik or you could have supported the slavers here on Kashyyyk. I am sorry, Nix but no matter what's wrong with your memory you're way too soft to be someone that cruel."

Nix sighed. "You know something, Mish. You sound like Carth on this. He basically told me I was making a flimsy house of pazaak cards."

I laughed. "You know something, Nix. Old Geez is right on this account."

Nix frowned once more. "Old Geez? You better not let Carth hear you talk like that. I mean I won't say anything to Carth about you calling him a geezer but you better not let me hear you talk like that because of...well..."

I smile. "Yea...I know...I know. You and Old...errr...Carth...are thicker than... well I guess I am gonna have to be polite since you're technically gonna be my folks, right?"

Nix nodded and we hugged. I heard a light growl and I looked up to see Big Z.

"Zaalbar!"

Zaalbar barked out a greeting and I grinned. "Guess what Big Z. Nix and Carth are gonna adopt me. I guess I am gonna be Mission Vao Onasi."

Zaalbar nodded and barked. "I am happy to hear this little cub. Looks like the sweetness of life like wasaka berries has blessed both our lives, Mission."

I smiled and Big Z turned towards Nix and he barked. "Phoenix Star…I am ready to leave with you and the rest of your crew."

Nix nodded. "Yea...it's probably time to get a move on." She chuckled."That should be interesting since…well since half the crew is probably wasted from your wedding, Zaalbar."

Big Z barked. "How are you, Phoenix Star? Last night you were pretty…"

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I finished Zaalbar's sentence. "Inebriated." I chuckled. "Yea...I was. But...I am a Jedi and...well I sort of have a few tricks to get myself from not feeling strung out."

Zaalbar chuckled. "That's good to hear…Phoenix Star. I think my mate was worried about your condition. She had some concerns but it is good to hear you are doing well."

"Well, I am sorry I had your mate worried, Zaalbar. Anyway, now that you're here we can get going."

Zaalbar barked. "Phoenix Star, what planet do you plan on going to next? I heard that there is a Shadowland planet that you must go to. Is that where you plan on going next?"

I shuddered. "You mean Korriban..." I wanted nothing to do with that place, why the frack did there have to be a Star Map on that damn Force-forsaken world. I could hear Revan still laughing within my head at my fear. She had been relatively silent on Kashyyyk, and I had hoped her influence had been...quieted within my mind. I guess not.

 _Why do you deny yourself going to a place of power, Phoenix?_

Umm, is it really power, Revan? If it remakes you into something else then…what's the point?

 _Ahh, so you are scared of the Force then. And yes, you are right in a sense, the Force will remake you. Jedi are scared of that. But you should embrace that change, Phoenix._

If it makes me into someone like you, Revan then no thanks. If I change then...I will be who I will be. Not someone like you.

Revan laughed. _We shall see, Jedi..._ and her voice disappeared. Frack, why couldn't she leave me alone?

Zaalbar nodded, and I noticed a look of relief in his eyes. I then stated, "I know Carth wants to find his son but...we need to fulfill our obligation to his friend Jordo. He's done a lot for you and your people, Zaalbar. And debts must be paid. Our next stop should be and will be Manaan."

Yea. It was an excuse but it was a good one. I felt bad doing this to Carth. I knew he'd probably get upset with me but maybe I could try and explain to him why I didn't want to go to Korriban. I had a feeling if I was frank about it….he'd probably understand. Yea, he'd get upset but...he would eventually understand.

Zaalbar replied. "I agree with you Phoenix Star. Debts must be paid. And we do owe Jordo a tremendous debt."

"Yea and I promised to get him to Manaan so he could get a job with the Republic. He does have a family he needs to support."

Zaalbar nodded in agreement with me. As I entered the dormitory, I went to the main console room and called the rest of the crew to come forward to the room. Yea, some of them looked bleary-eyed. Carth was still nursing a hangover, Jordo the same. I chuckled lightly, they might as well had been brothers those two. Canderous seemed okay, well it was always said that Mandalorians could handle their liquor. Bastila and Juhani came both of them radiated calm which they had gotten from meditating. Well, at least they seemed calm, at least on the surface. Bastila always tried to hide her feelings and emotions. I knew better than to trust what Bastila tried to give off from her presence in the Force. Part of me felt I was to blame for her lack of calm. Juhani on the other hand, she seemed sincere in trying to focus herself into a calm peaceful being. For a cathar, that had to be hard.

T3's chassis was a bit open and he beeped that Canderous had been installing some combat-related gear to his systems. Jolee shrugged as he plopped himself down in a chair and was reading some sort of medical text off a datapad. He was trying to give off the impression that he didn't care what we...or rather I did. However, I knew better and perhaps he knew I knew that given our conversation from earlier. He looked up a moment and gave me a good-natured grin then returned to the text. I wasn't exactly sure why the Old Man was so intrigued by me. I wondered what he had been like when he was younger. He did say he had followed that "kid" that got swallowed down an engine. Perhaps, Jolee liked to follow vergences in the Force. Wonderful, I thought I am a vergence in the Force. I also wondered what text he was reading or pretending to read. Anyway…back to the reason why I had called our half strung out crew to notify them of our next destination.

I smiled and then said. "We are headed to Manaan, or at least that's where I want to go because we all owe Jordo a debt for his help towards helping Zaalbar and his clan, but we require a vote."

Canderous stated. "I'll go wherever you want, Aku...Phoenix."

His vote didn't surprise me. The droids were or seemed indifferent. HK stated. Statement: I am happy to go where ever you wish to go, master, as long as I get to kill something.

I snorted, that figured.

Mission grinned and said, "Doesn't matter where we go, Nix. As long...well...I want to be a part of your next stop. I am irritated just sitting around here. I want you to know I can help you, Nix. Otherwise…I'll vote against you."

Zaalbar suddenly roared. "But Mission, we all owe Jordo a debt for helping free my people."

Mission shook her head. "Yea...but at least you were able to help your people. Me. I was stuck on the ship."

Suddenly T3 spoke up or rather beeped. ::I agree with Mission. I too wish to be part of your next stop.::

So much for indifference, from T3 and where did Mission get this whole blackmail idea? Probably sitting around the Hawk had given her an independent streak. Course, in her position, I'd have probably have done the same thing. I had a feeling that, Bastila and Juhani would go for Manaan over Korriban because of it's Dark Side influence and Jolee would abstain. Carth would probably protest till I won him over.

"Mission, I am sorry if you have felt ignored or that you felt like all you have accomplished is sit around. We both know that isn't true. You helped facilitate Zaalbar's reconciliation with his family, you managed to get past the Czerka comm signal blackout, and you had this place loaded with mines. I can't promise you or T3 that you will be able to be a part of the mission to find the next Star Map but I will try to find some way to make you and T3 useful during this next leg of our trip. And seriously do you know what Korriban is like?"

"Yea, it's a planet full of drooling over power Sith Lords and Dark Jedi. Big fat hairy deal."

Jolee snorted. "And they make a fine Sandwich also."

I shook my head, leave it to the old man to joke about the Sith.

Bastila finally spoke. "For a Jedi, Korriban is a nexus of Dark Side energies. I agree with Phoenix. Korriban should be saved for our last spot. It is going to take some planning to figure out how we are going to be able to walk around on that planet; without the Sith figuring out we are with the Republic."

Juhani nodded. "Bastila is right on this, Mission. We should not walk rashly onto a planet held by the Sith."

"So?" Mission asked in a rather defiant tone, that would make adults rage and fume and I could sense that this whole damn vote was going to fall apart because of it.

I shook my head. "It's in the fracking heart of Malak's power base, Mission. And..."

Carth suddenly spoke up, "And my son is there. I can't believe you won't go to Korriban first. My son is more important than some map."

Jordo coughed. "Honestly, I don't have to go to...Manaa..."

Bastila shook her head and interrupted Jordo. "And you know that's not true, Carth. Your son is important, but our mission is more so. Darth Malak gets stronger the longer we don't go after the map."

"But isn't there a map piece on Korriban as well?" Carth countered.

"There is but..." I paused.

"But what?" Carth demanded.

I simply couldn't tell Carth that being possessed by Revan did not make going to Korriban an easy task. What if…the Dark Lord ended up re-emerging from me? I couldn't…couldn't let that happen.

"I need to center myself before I even consider going to Korriban...I promise we will find your son. I made that vow but...I can't go there…not now. I know we have to go there eventually but not fracking now! I can't guarantee how I will react to that place. Don't ask me to go there now, Carth. Please…don't."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

Phoenix's eyes radiated pure fear. She was petrified in sheer terror. I had never seen that look on her face before. Something about Korriban scared her. She wanted to help my son. I could see that too, but her confidence was gone. I wanted my son, but I couldn't hurt Phoenix either. She was deeply worried about heading for that Sith world. What was it about Korriban that either drove fear or desire into Force Users? I couldn't figure it out. Yea, I had small inklings of the Force in my life. It helped me in combat and it helped me figure out that there was something off about Saul and his betrayal, but in the end, I was a complete and total idiot when it came to the ways of the Jedi and the Force. Yet, I supposed I was going to have to get used to this, after all, I was going to marry Phoenix and she could do things around her that other people couldn't. I wondered...I couldn't help if there was room for me in this world of strange mystical powers that she, Bastila, Juhani and Jolee welded.

Jordo spoke, "Look, I am honored that people want me to go to Manaan but...it's apparent your mission is way more important than me having a job and helping my family out."

Phoenix looked over at Jordo. "Manaan has some importance to our mission as well, Jordo. Plus..."She paused and then said calmly, "You may be able to help us again."

Jordo frowned as well as myself. Jordo responded, "Help you, how?"

Phoenix shrugged. "No idea. Just…a feeling."

I hissed back at her, "Feelings...what about my feelings, Phoenix? What about my son?"

She turned, and the tears started coming down her face. "You want me to go to Korriban. Fine. But if I fall to the Dark Side, I'll blame you…"

She stormed off and I cringed. Jolee suddenly clapped his hands together. "Well done, sonny. I suppose even a trandoshan isn't as thick as you just were. And confidentially, I agree with her. Korriban is not the right place for her at the moment."

Canderous laughed. "Smooth move…lover boy. If you couldn't tell why she doesn't want to go to that planet, you're going to be a terrible husband."

Bastila glared at me, her features were cold almost like daggers. She went after Phoenix.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

My heart leaped within my chest, to see Carth and Phoenix have an argument over our destination suddenly pleased me. _Stop it, Bastila. She still loves him._ I found Revan in the cockpit, and she sighed. "Go away, Bastila…I know what you're going to say."

"Then you need to hear me say it. You and Carth are going down different paths. He's not even Force sens..."

Phoenix suddenly laughed. "Partially Force sensitive...Bastila. He has the Force but he can't…" She paused."He can't manipulate it directly. But just because he can't doesn't mean...he's any less of an individual. His son apparently is Force Sensitive. And I promised I'd save his son from the Sith, assuming he wants to be saved."

Revan wasn't as far gone as I had previously thought. She wanted to save Carth's son from the Sith. Yet her emotions were...confusing as they were filled with desire, passion, love. It mirrored my own. I longed to lay my head on her chest. I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to tell her that Carth could not understand her power and connection in the Force like I could. I wanted as deep as a connection as she now had for Carth. These thoughts, these feelings all were forbidden and I could not even think of sharing them with her and I ended up burying those emotions deep within me hoping that she would not feel them through our bond. How could I be so selfish? Revan had made her request so abundantly clear, she had rejected me.

Phoenix sighed. "Bastila…I can't go to Korriban. Even if it is for the Star Map. I don't think you should end up their either. I can sense your feelings...hidden as they may be. They are just as conflicted as mine. We will both fall to the Dark Side, and we both will be no good to the Republic or even the Order. I know eventually, we will have to go there but...in time. Everything in time...and the will of the Force."

I nodded. "We should leave for Manaan, Phoenix…"

"I agree. I hate doing this to Carth, but I can't do Korriban. Not yet. I am not ready. I may never be ready but...I accept that."

I heard a cough, and I turned to find Carth. "Phoenix…I am sorry. I should have realized..." He paused."What is it about Korriban? Why can't we go after my son?"

I felt awkward and withdrew from the two because I felt as though I had no place with either one of them.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"Well, Republic...I told Bastila what I felt, and I'll tell you. I am not ready to go into a Sith held planet and face its darkness. Korriban has a horrible history. It's steeped in the Dark Side and if I go unprepared I'll…end up or I fear I will be consumed by it. I worry about your son. He's probably already meshed into that darkness and...may also be consumed by it. " I sighed. "I just can't do it. Not yet, I am sorry. I feel like I've failed you and your son."

Carth put a hand on my shoulder. "Don't talk like that my little Raven. You haven't failed."

"But I have. I should be able to go to Korriban and save your son. But I can't. I have failed as a Jedi."

"I'd rather have you here with me than lose you to the Sith, Phoenix. I've already lost my wife…I don't want to lose you."

"But your son?"

Carth paused and then squeezed my hand. "You have my strength, love. When you're ready, we'll face that darkness together. Until then...let's go to Manaan and in the meantime...I'll do what I can to get you ready for Korriban."

"Thanks, Carth. I was afraid you wouldn't understand."

He nodded. "Well then...my little Blackbird, let's go off to Manaan."

He sat in the pilot's seat and took the ship up and away from Kashyyyk as stars filled our vision, Carth set the coordinates for Manaan. The hyperdrive kicked in and the stars blurred before us.

* * *

A/N: And thus ends Kashyyyk. I want to thank my loyal readers for reading my chapters. Now there will be some off-planet stuff and some travel in hyperspace chapters for your enjoyment before we hit Manaan. Yes, as you can probably guess we are following the canon for the planet visits. This wasn't easy because I knew Carth would whine and complain about not seeing Dustil right off. But...I rather like the canon visits of the planets.

Additionally, I want to invite you to read another story by another author. I've become their beta and think it's only fair I do some self-promotion on their story. His Pen name is Jack Volcano, and his story is titled Skywalker's Weakness. English isn't his first language, and he's been translating his story into English so I am trying to help him get at least the structure right. His first chapters are a bit sketchy but I just recently became his beta and I am trying to help him out as best as I can.


	73. Chapter 72: Connections

**Chapter 72:Connections**

::Korriban::

 **~Dustil~**

I gasped as I woke up in a cold drenched sweat, it had been over five years since Telos had been firebombed. I would see images of my home burning and my mother crying out my name. Selene had always been able to help me get me through the worst of those dreams. I had thought those dreams were gone, but since her disappearance, the dreams had returned with a vengeance. I took a quick shower in the academy freshers and donned my uniform. Master Uthar requested my presence every morning and since I was already awake I reported to him.

Master Uthar was a human, I think. I wasn't quite sure. He was pale, had a bald head and his face and most of his bald head were covered with purple Sith tattoos. Plus his eyes glowed with a sickly yellowish cast. Seriously, I guess most of the Sith Masters around here wanted to emulate Lord Malak. Frankly, I thought Malak was butt ugly, but no one dared to utter that. Uthar might have been a handsome guy in his prime, but he looked pretty washed out like he had too many late night benders. Yet, I had learned that that was the price of the Dark Side, it took a lot out of you.

"Ahh, Dustil."

I did not answer, a Sith does not answer unless bidden to answer. I merely nodded.

"Did you…sleep well?"

"Master?"

"It's alright...you can tell me the truth...you haven't slept well since Selene's disappearance, have you? It is no shame to recognize that Selene is haunting your dreams lately."

"No, Master, I do not sleep well but...my dreams have nothing to do with Selene."

"Oh, but I think they do. Otherwise, you wouldn't be up so early as you are now. Tell me Dustil what do you dream?"

"I…I really shouldn't…" I did not feel comfortable telling the Sith Headmaster the dreams that haunted me.

"Oh, but I insist…you want to tell me." His eyes bore into me and I shivered, but then he was the Headmaster. I was his pupil, and a student, should tell his master everything.

"I...will tell you. My home...my home on Telos... is on fire…my mother is dying...and..."

"And what?"

The rage and anger filled my heart and my hands clamped into fists. "My father…he should have been there….he should have saved us. But...he wasn't. He let...he let...my mother die."

Uthar smiled. "Ahh, I feel the kernel of hate within your heart, Dustil. It is sweet, do you not feel it?"

I nodded. "It's always been there, Master Uthar. I...well…"

I did not want to admit that Selene had always been able to quell the anger that I had for my father. She always told me my father, and Telos was my past and that I should let go of the past and embrace my future.

"I don't care about my father, Master Uthar. I hope he's dead and rotted with the rest of Telos. My past is dead, Master Uthar. It died on Telos, and my future is with the Sith."

Uthar nodded. "But your past fuels and gives you power, Dustil. You should not deny it. In fact...I have an opportunity for you, Dustil."

"An opportunity, Master?"

"Lord Malak's apprentice is looking for a servant…to help him on a mission Lord Malak is sending him on. Your potential to possibly find Lord Bandon's favor and Malak's is very high, Dustil. I have spoken to them regarding you and...well I felt confident in recommending you to them."

This sounded way too easy. Why would Master Uthar recommend me to Lord Malak's apprentice? It made no sense. If this was a chance to find favor with the Dark Lord or his apprentice why was Master Uthar recommending me to him in the first place? Frankly, I would think Master Uthar would leap at the possibility to become Bandon's apprentice. Instead, it seemed as though Uthar was pushing me towards being Lord Bandon's apprentice. Why? What was in it for him?

"Recommended me, Master? Why?"

"Oh, I have a feeling that this mission might help you develop your power and cut ties with your past, that's why."

"My past, Master Uthar?"

"Now Dustil...I looked over your records...and I know you're a refugee from Telos. Your father..."

"...Was a Republic soldier, Master Uthar." In all honesty, for all I was concerned, my father was dead or should have been dead. Why couldn't he have died instead of my mother?

I continued. "If you're worried about my loyalty to the Sith, then you shouldn't be. I swore allegiance to Lord Malak and to the Sith, Master. If there is any way I can prove myself to Lord Malak's Empire then…"

Master Uthar laughed. "Oh, I am not worried about your loyalty, Dustil. You've proven yourself during your training. You killed several of our Republic prisoners during combat training. I have no doubt that your...loyalties whatever they were to the Republic are dead. But...you're untried and untested. I am not fully convinced of your resolve. If you can prove yourself during this mission with Lord Bandon then I will be convinced of your resoluteness to make you a Sith in full and...if Lord Bandon is pleased with your performance there is a possibility...well I don't think you need to know your rank and position with the Sith could rise."

I nodded. "What is the mission, Master Uthar?"

"There are some Selkath youth that need to be lured away from their parents on Manaan. They are very close to joining the Sith. Since you're about their age or so...Lord Bandon thinks you could be useful in helping them embrace the Sith Order. They would then join you here on Korriban. You will be the face of the youth of the Sith, Dustil. I envy you, your youth and the opportunity you will have. Of Course, there may be other tasks that Lord Bandon may request of you."

"Of course, for the glory of the Sith, Master Uthar."

The Sith Master smiled. "You will find, Lord Bandon in Dreshdae, Dustil."

"Master, why doesn't Lord Bandon come to the academy itself?"

"Don't be absurd, Dustil. Lord Bandon is much too important to surround himself with inferiors. Including…" he paused a moment and sighed. "Me. I may be the Headmaster of this academy. Yet, the Dark Lords are our Masters, Dustil and at least in Lord Malak's eyes and…"

Uthar paused. His voice seemed to take on a tone of disgust at the fact that Malak and Bandon looked upon him as an inferior within the Force itself. That could be of use to me later on, yet...I had a feeling if I pressed on Uthar's discontent, I would displease the Sith Master and he would be angry with me. He could deny my mission and my chance at becoming a full Sith. There was no way I was going to risk that.

Master Uthar continued. "I was also told that Lord Malak has taken an interest in you...Dustil, enough to send his apprentice to Korriban to take you on his next mission."

Hmm...that sounded like the truth from Master Uthar. However, Master Uthar had first said he had recommended me. Or was he pressured to recommend me? Something about what he had said sounded odd. He had said he was the one who recommended me to Lord Bandon and now he said it had been Malak who had taken an interest in me. I got the feeling there was something that Master Uthar wasn't telling me. Again, if I pressed for too much information from Uthar, I'd upset the Sith Master and I was in no position to challenge him. No, this information could be of use to Master Yuthura.

After all, Master Yuthura was Master Uthar's apprentice. I could pit those two against each other and watch what would happen. Plus I'd gain information from Master Ban in the process. Well, hopefully, I'd gain the information I required about this mission. Assuming that Master Ban knew what was going on. If not...then Master Ban would be angry about not being in the loop. After all...I was only an acolyte or a hopeful and...if she didn't know what was going on, that would be a total breach of etiquette.

I smiled and bowed before Master Uthar. "So...go to Dreshdae and meet Lord Bandon. Very well, Master Uthar. Just give me some time to gather my things, and I will meet Lord Bandon. By the way, I have never met, Darth Bandon. What exactly does he look like?"

Uthar sighed. "It is said that Bandon….at least at present has decided to dress and emulate his Master, Darth Malak."

I tried to hold back what I felt but I couldn't and a light chuckle emerged from my lips. I couldn't help but think of how ugly Malak was. Why would anyone want to look like him in the first place? Master Uthar frowned. "I see that that amuses you in some way, acolyte. Take care, Darth Bandon won't tolerate such disrespect as I would."

I bowed my head. "Forgive me, Master. I meant no disrespect. It is just that Lord Malak is…so... awe-inspiring, I couldn't imagine his apprentice would be able to precisely mimic his master's appearance appropriately."

Well...not exactly the truth...but I couldn't tell Uthar what I genuinely thought, not unless I wanted to be punished for disrespect.

Master Uthar responded, "Indeed, Lord Malak is a paragon of great power. Now...I would advise you prepare for your journey, Dustil."

I bowed. "As you wish, Master Uthar."

* * *

 **~Master Uthar ~**

Dustil Onasi…son of a Republic soldier…Captain Carth Onasi at least that's what the records I had regarding Dustil. So amusing that I was able to slowly bring Dustil closer to the true Dark Side adapt that I wanted. I chuckled, it was all so easy and apparently, Malak...no, not Malak, Revan. Revan had maintained very extensive records over every Force-sensitive person he had taken prisoner from every planet that we had conquered and had downloaded all the planetary records from each planet. Dustil had at first denied who he was but now he proudly admitted who his father was and...he had blossomed into a true child of the Sith and was willing to destroy the same Republic his father fought for. I laughed at the irony of it all. It was like Ulic Qel-Droma and Cay Qel-Droma all over again.

Revan may have completed the work for these records, yet Malak benefited from the tedious labor his master had done. Malak said that Dustil would have a chance to take down allies of the Jedi. Yet, Malak was not very clear on who those "allies" were or who the Jedi were that he was hunting. He only said that one of them was Dustil's father and that Dustil could be very useful to him. I was gratified that Dustil would have the opportunity to take revenge on his father, however, it did not gratify me that Dustil, my prized student was being yanked from my grasp.

Most of the time, Malak didn't get involved in the politics or the affairs of the academy, unlike Revan. When Revan was the Sith Lord, he often came and demanded reports of my students. He'd take my best students, and I never saw them again. Malak tended to have more of a laid-back approach about the academy. He did not seem to care for any of my students. However, I often sent the Sith Lord reports from the academy. It was almost as if Malak didn't care about Korriban or the activities that took place here. Although I did revel in the freedom that I didn't get from Revan, I couldn't help but feel that Malak was a weak leader. A better leader would actually take a more proactive approach about Korriban, the relics that were here, and the acolytes that we were training. I couldn't help but think Malak was making a mistake ignoring his power base here. And as much as I disliked Revan getting deeply into my affairs of this academy. I respected him for it because Revan did not make me feel too much like an inferior.

He even laughed when he had found out I had replaced my own master and Revan said to me when we first met face to face or rather face to mask, _"_ _So you're the new headmaster, huh? Can't say I am surprised. Jorak was getting a bit…unpredictable and difficult to manage. He kept muttering all the time about a perfect tuk'ata hybrid he was trying to piece together with Sith alchemy. He was growing lax in the position I had given him in the first place. Serve me, Uthar. Give me new adapts when I request them and we will get along splendidly." So_ getting the communique from Malak and Bandon about wanting Dustil Onasi was surprising, to say the least. Particularly when both Master and Apprentice acted like they could hardly be bothered with the academy and me. Yet, when the Sith Lord demanded one of my best students, I could not refuse, I could only obey.

I could have used Dustil to keep Yuthura in her place. Yet, one does not so easily go up against the master of all the Sith or his apprentice. It bothered me I would have no strong control over Dustil, if he came back he might get ideas about overthrowing me or siding with Yuthura. It was not unheard of, after all...the students here all power struggled with each other for rank. Such was the way of the Dark Side and the Sith. But Dustil's power in the Force was growing...I had to make sure when the time was right he ended up siding with me.

I watched as Dustil trudged off, his anger simmering like a sweet desirable nectar. I had been right to get rid of Selene, now Dustil would be molded into the proper student that I wanted. I just had to make sure Malak or Bandon didn't decide to turn Dustil against me. Although Malak and Bandon seemed normally disinterested in my students. Dustil's potential in the Force might end up changing their minds. Hopefully, Dustil would come back and this mission would be his test to become a full Sith. Once he passed, I would pressure him to get rid of Yuthura. She was getting more and more rebellious. Of course, she always said she was looking for fresh blood or talent to help the Sith; but I was no fool, she was looking for a student that she could manipulate to get rid of me.

* * *

 **~Master Yuthura ~**

I began my daily rounds around the academy and Dreshdae. I was looking for a new hopeful. One that could help me take on Master Uthar. So far the hopefuls around me or even the new arrivals on Korriban did not impress me. Then again, perhaps the hopefuls did seem unimpressed with a twi'lek Sith Master. The ungrateful gamorrean swine probably were thinking that the Sith Master I was…was human. Damn humans and their superiority complex, add the Dark Side to that and it got worse. Most of those hopefuls that had even slighted me ended up dead. No, I did not kill them...but..I had my favorites already in the academy take care of them. After all, I did not feel like dirtying my hands with individuals whose Force abilities were merely a blip in the galaxy.

"Hello, Dustil, are you going somewhere?" I noticed Dustil had a pack on his back and his lightsaber in his hand.

"Master Yuthura...I have been assigned to a mission off Korriban."

"Ahh, I see…"

What mission? Damn it, Master Uthar had told me nothing of this. What else had he been hiding from me? Yet I kept my face impassive and revealed nothing to the adolescent boy. The boy slightly reminded me of myself. His desire for revenge against his father and the Republic burned as brightly as my own against the foul slavers of Sleheyron. Normally, he was often seen with his friend, Selene but...Master Uthar and I had decided that Selene was a crutch to the boy and that the best way for Dustil to be open to the Dark Side was to eliminate her. Selene had no future with the Sith, her power in the Force was mediocre at best. It was a cruel fact that some Force-sensitives were probably better off with the Jedi, not that I would ever publicly admit that to Uthar. Most Force sensitives like Selene were killed and I could not help but think that such culling of such students was a bit wasteful. If they could be used in some way before they were eliminated then...but Dustil had improved a lot, his power in the Dark Side and grown since her elimination.

"So Master Uthar has given you permission to leave the academy?" It was rare for adapts to the academy to even be granted permission to leave the academy and join the Sith fleet on a mission. Uthar usually tested his adapts before they left the academy for good and joined the ranks of the Empire. So this mission seemed a bit irregular.

Dustil offered a well-placed grin. "I am assigned with Lord Bandon, Master Yuthura."

Malak's apprentice? So it seemed that Uthar had been talking with Malak and I knew nothing of this. Damn Uthar, I was supposed to be his apprentice and it seemed that Dustil knew more than I of what was going on. However, how much did he know? And how much could I ask Dustil without him finding out that I knew nothing of this mission?

"Recite your objective to me, Dustil!"

"To bring the Selkath youth back to Korriban."

I smiled and pretended that I knew all along regarding the mission."I thought as much. We will teach the youth of the Selkath the power of the Dark Side and then when the Sith take control of Manaan, it will be done through their own children."

Dustil nodded. "Master Yuthura...is there anything else...you require me to do while I am on Manaan?"

I chuckled lightly to myself, so Master Uthar had not told Dustil everything either, this could work to my advantage as well. I smiled. "So the adapt wants to know if I know something of worth. Pearls of wisdom, perhaps?"I suddenly laughed lightly."What do I look like, some sort of Jedi?"

Dustil laughed with me and then said. "Of course not, Master Yuthura. I just wondered perhaps if…Master Uthar may have possibly forgotten something...something important."

"Do you think...I would so easily betray my master, Dustil?"

Dustil suddenly grinned. "I think…that…." He paused."That betrayal is the way of the Sith and if you needed someone to help you overthrow Master Uthar...you'd be willing to...do anything to gain an advantage."

I chuckled. "You know me well, acolyte. But...how can I trust you...not to…" I paused."I know how you and Master Uthar are close."

Dustil snorted. "He teaches me the way of the Sith, Master Yuthura…but I do not think he can teach me much more, except give me my Sith Lightsaber."

"Ahh, I see...and do you think I could enlighten you more, Dustil?"

* * *

 **~Dustil~**

I looked at the twi'lek Sith Master Yuthura. From our conversation, I could glean that she knew nothing which meant we had something in common and a possible alliance. Perhaps more. Selene had always been kind of jealous of Master Yuthura. She said I had a crush on her. Well, she possessed sort of an exotic mien about her that I kind of liked. Those Sith tattoos, and her purplish-grey skin...well there was enough for a young man like me to be kind of interested in her. Selene had laughed at me and said that it was a simple infatuation with a teacher. I had been embarrassed over Selene's teasing and I had turned a deep shade of red over it. Selene gave me a grin over that and then she kissed me, not a deep kiss but a light peck on my lips that sent my heart a reeling. I sighed over those memories. I missed her but decided that I would devote myself fully to my training to honor her memory. However, Selene had been probably right over my infatuation with Yuthura. Plus the fact that I was only an adept and Yuthura was a Sith Master. There was also the reality that she likely was old enough to be...well not exactly my mother's age...but kind of close.

There was an emptiness in my heart over the absence of Selene, why did she have to take on that task from Master Uthar? Some of the tasks in the Valley of the Dark Lords were dangerous. Anyway, I knew that after what Master Yuthura and I had both discussed she'd more than likely plot on taking down Master Uthar. I could inform him of it, but...I decided that telling Master Uthar didn't serve me...at least not at the moment. After all, he was not telling me the full truth of my mission. So why should I tell him anything at all? I shrugged. "Perhaps...your teachings could be of use to me."

Yuthura laughed. "Don't hesitate for long, young one. I might still find a hopeful that suits my purpose."

I smiled. "You think…I might still betray you…Master Yuthura?"

Yuthura responded to me,"I think, you're clever, Dustil and I think that while you are away you will consider what I am offering you. I wish you well on Manaan, Dustil and may you find that that power comes quickly into your hands."

I chuckled lightly."I will consider your offer, Master Yuthura."

I wandered off with my belongings on my back and out of the academy. Korriban was a harsh planet and the wind often kicked up dust. It prickled against my skin and stung like a whip. The air had a harsh metallic twang, almost a blood-like quality to it and Selene had said it excited her when we first came that it stirred her blood. It stirred my blood as well, there was power here. I felt it.

 _Dustil..._

I paused a moment. Selene? For a moment, I thought I heard her voice. It sounded sad but no…that was the wind. It howled like a tu'kata. There was pain and anger here, a focus of power. I sighed as I closed my eyes and drew on that pain and anger letting if fuel me.

 _Dustil...my Dustil…_

My eyes snapped open. The wind, it was the wind. I quickly entered the colony of Dreshdae. Hopefuls looked at me and I grinned at them. They all hoped I could be the opportunity for them to get inside the academy.

A young orange skinned colored twi'lek girl looked at me. "Is there some secret….some way to get into the academy?"

"Go leap off the highest cliff…that will get Master Yuthura's attention."

The girl paled. "I uhh…maybe not."

"Then quit bothering me…you pathetic twi'lek. If you're not willing to do whatever it takes to be a Sith then you're not worth my time."

The girl sighed and her lekku slumped rather depressed. I looked once more at the girl, she wasn't too unpleasant to look at and I considered maybe…some time alone with the girl before I left for Manaan. Yet, if I was late with my meeting with Lord Bandon...he could leave without me. _Nope, stop thinking about girls, Dustil_. Besides, there was only one girl I still had feelings for. Selene. Selene would have murdered me if I even considered taking this girl for a brief fling, even though the idea was kind of tempting.

However, Selene was dead and...well...maybe one little drink before I left. Her company could at least be pleasant. I then said, "Wait a minute hopeful."

Her eyes suddenly brightened. "Yes..."

"Buy me a drink…and I might consider recommending you to the academy."

"Oh...I suppose I could do that."

* * *

 **~Omni~**

I sat in the cantina...waiting. She would come, I didn't know when but I felt with absolute certainty that Revan would come to Korriban. I would serve her and together we would destroy her apprentice. It did not matter what side of the Force she served. I remembered her capturing me, we had fought in glorious combat but in the end, she disarmed me and then we went to some dark place. She had mentioned it was where all her enemies had died. I had no clue where that was at the time but later learned that Revan had brought me to Malachor V.

I had failed at my mission, a mission that the Jedi had sworn me to secrecy. A mission to kill Lord Revan, why they had even considered such a feat? A feat that in itself was wrong, but at the time the Jedi felt they had no choice. I mused that they had probably learned later on that meeting force with force was the wrong lesson. I had learned as well, the Jedi were hypocrites. In one instant advocating peaceful resolution and then sending me in what they termed in a mission to "subdue" the Dark Lord. At least the Sith were honest about their intentions.

" _Ahh…Echani…I shall enjoy breaking you. Did you know my master was Echani? She was a very powerful woman in the Force. You, however, are nothing…your intentions during combat are very easy to read. You are delightfully violent, that's not normal for a Jedi. I like you. You may be loyal to the Jedi now…but loyalties in war can be made to be... flexible."_

 _Revan traced her hand under my jaw. I cringed. I had heard that Revan had severed the jaw of Malak. Would Revan do the same to me? "Soon you will call me Lord Revan, and I shall remake you. You will serve me like all those in my Empire."_

 _I remained firm in my defiance. "I will never call you Lord. You are a Sith, an enemy of the Jedi and I will never serve the Sith."_

 _Revan chuckled. "Oh, but you will…I just need to convince you of my cause and my power..." She paused and then said, "...that and I need an Echani to spar with. I miss sparing with my master in the Echani martial arts."_

 _I screamed in pain as Revan suddenly pulsed a salvo of lighting into my body. "Now…bow before me Echani. Pain shall be your teacher, and I shall be your master."_

" _Never…I will never serve you or the Dark Side."_

" _You will…Echani…you will…."_

 _Days went by or was it weeks. I could not remember, all I remembered was the pain. How I desperately wanted the pain to end. In the end, I could not even feel the light of the Force. It had forsaken me. This place was strong with death, pain, and the Dark Side. I had no future with the Jedi because if I remained loyal to them, I would die. Revan had made it clear to me that I would die if I did not yield._

 _In the end, I had nobody but Revan. She would abandon me in a dark room but came often, she came with pain for my defiance and then with food or even with kolto. She was a cunning warrior that was true. If I did not please her during my imprisonment, she would deny me small favors. Kolto to heal the wounds she had inflicted on me or food when days went by and she had starved me._

 _She came with a plate of food and then sat it in front of me. She chuckled. "Hungry, Echani?"_

 _I licked my lips with hunger._

 _She dangled a piece close to my face._

" _But first…call me Master and I will permit you what you wish. I can reward with kindness or punish with cruelty as I see fit. I own you. You are mine, Echani. Now you have a strong will...you have denied me my title which is mine by right. Now...who am I?"_

" _Master…"_

" _Good...you are learning. Now…"_

 _The bonds that held me suddenly dropped from me. "There is no escape…only death if you defy me. Now...eat."_

 _I took the food and ate, and she chuckled. "Do you have a name, Echani?"_

" _Omni...my Lord. I am Omni Khan."_

" _Ahh, an apt name. It means omnipotent. Are you omnipotent, Omni?"_

" _I...I am not all-powerful, my Lord."_

" _No...you are not...but you could become such in my service. Malak wearies me...his attempts at trying to betray me are becoming more and more frequent. I could raise you to be my second in his stead. You would like that, wouldn't you?"_

" _Only as you desire, my Lord and as you will."_

 **~0o~**

 _I bowed before Lord Revan as she removed her mask. I raised an eyebrow. Did my Lord favor me that she chose to show her face before me? Her smile was cold and feral like a loth-wolf and her eyes were black and dark as obsidian, no light gleamed within them. "My servant….my shadow. Is it not better to be my Battlemaster than the Jedi's? But surely their need was desperate to send a known lightsaber fighter against me. And what exactly were their intentions by sending you against me, Omni?"_

" _They asked me to subdue you, Lord Revan."_

" _Subdue...that's a fancy word of basically saying kill me. Tsk...tsk...tsk...but that's alright you're my servant now. You shall bring me several Jedi to my service. They will join me as you have or...you shall kill them. Would you like that my shadow?"_

 _I smiled. "It would be my pleasure…Lord Revan."_

" _Good. Serve me and be loyal to me. Also...bring me knowledge of whatever my apprentice is doing. If I find out that he is disobeying me...I shall reward you, Omni Khan. Now the other reason you are in my favor…I wish to hone my skills in your martial arts. It has been a long time since I've found an opponent that knows such combat...now I wish to improve my skill. There are so few Echani that are with me. The last Echani I had was a slave. I killed him...but he was reborn into you. You are my shadow, and I know you are loyal to no one but me. Do not hold back… my shadow. For if you do…I will punish you."_

"You ungrateful swine…you had no intention of letting me into the academy."

I lifted up my head to see a twi'lek girl violently slap a youth across the face. The boy chuckled and then grabbed the girl's hands, so she could not move.

I got up from my seat. These Korriban brats disgusted me. They were crude and thought that small cruelties made them powerful. When in truth, it made them only bullies, petty thieves and punks. They were undisciplined. If I had the chance, I would teach true discipline, these Sith that Malak and the headmaster were churning out disgusted me. I knew if my master was here she would have been angry at such things.

I ignited my lightsaber. "You will apologize to the girl, or I will gut you myself."

The boy laughed. "Who are you?"

I folded my arms. "I serve the Dark Lord of the Sith."

His eyes suddenly went downward in a chastised manner. "Lord Bandon? You don't look like Darth Bandon. I was told he looks like Malak."

I snarled, "Apologize to the girl or else..."

He sighed. "Fine."

He turned towards the girl. "Umm sorry…"

The girl merely nodded and then got up from her seat and left.

I glared at the young man. "Now...give me one good reason why I shouldn't…punish you for your undisciplined action."

"I am sorry…Lord Bandon…"

There was a laugh and I turned. "Omni….Omni Khan….I thought that Revan had you killed."

I found myself gazing straight into the glowing yellow eyes of Bandon. "Oh is that what Revan told you. Then surely you don't know Revan as well as you thought."

The boy I had spent time disciplining suddenly glared at me in anger. He ignited his lightsaber and snarled. "You lied to me...you said you served the Dark Lord."

I said calmly, "I do. Just not the current one."

Bandon snorted and then chuckled at the boy's comment. "Apparently not. So how did you survive Revan's wrath at your failure?"

So that is what Lord Revan called my being placed in stasis and how she was able to hide me from Malak. She had told him she had killed me. I grinned. "Do not believe everything you hear, Bandon."

"That's Lord Bandon...to you…Echani cur. I am Malak's apprentice, and you are nothing! Why are you even here? You are not welcome on Korriban, traitor."

"I am not a traitor, Lord…Bandon. I serve the Sith."

"You serve no one but yourself, Omni. You should be dead."

I ignited my lightsaber. "Do you honestly want to prove that...in combat?"

Lord Bandon laughed. "You are not worth my time, Echani dog. Your master is dead, and you're a sentimental fool. Now get out of this cantina before I change my mind."

I snorted. "I do not run."

"You are a fool, Echani and it will…"

I paused and looked around the cantina. My odds of surviving an assault were not very high, at least not here.

"Lord Bandon...I challenge you...but not here."

Bandon laughed. "What? Echani dueling rituals? Why should I honor your petty request at combat, Omni Khan?"

I bowed my head. "A fair chance to gut me…Lord Bandon. When and where you wish. Besides...you said you did not have time to deal with me."

Lord Bandon smiled. "I don't. I have come to kill her. When I kill her...I will rub her blood on your pale Echani face."

"If I win...I will give her your head. She can do with it what she wishes."

Bandon laughed. "I will see you on Manaan…if you can figure out a way past the Selkath's neutrality."

"I will find a way…Darth Bandon. And then after your death...I will see she severs the head of your master."

Bandon laughed. "Wishful thinking, Echani. Wishful thinking."

I smiled. "I will see you on Manaan, Lord Bandon and I will find a way to get past such things. If I don't then, I will come back and gut you...in The Valley of the Dark Lords."

Bandon laughed. "You are a coward...Omni Khan...as always."

"At least I don't serve a coward that cannot face their master face to face in true combat. That is the way of the Sith, a way that Lord Malak has forgotten. The Force does not look kindly on ones who betray tradition."

Bandon snarled. "Out of my sight…Echani dog. The next time we meet, I will kill you."

* * *

 **~Darth Bandon~**

I had walked into the cantina not expecting to meet an old rival. I genuinely thought that Revan had killed the Echani. Yet, here he was alive and taking an interest in the Sith adapt I had come to take with me. While the mission was supposed to be a mission to recruit the youth of Manaan. The real purpose of this mission was to have Dustil Onasi kill his father. As of this moment, the boy probably had no clue, but that was the real test of any Sith. If a Sith could walk the path of the Dark Side, they would cut and do away with all attachments, including family. It was enough of a test, to see if the young man could face his father and devote himself fully to the Dark Side. Plus my spies had made note of the fact that Revan and Carth Onasi seemed very attached to each other. Killing Carth Onasi would be the easiest way to wound the heart of this shell. The adolescent boy still stood and had his lightsaber ignited and I chuckled as the Echani cur walked away.

I glared at the boy and motioned for him to extinguish his blade. "You must be Dustil Onasi."

He nodded and then extinguished his blade. He then said, "Who was that creep?"

"Never you mind. A pathetic cur who can't comprehend his time is over and that Lord Malak and I are the true power in the galaxy."

I offered the boy my hand. "Come Dustil. I will help complete your training and if I am pleased with you and your service, perhaps I will make you my shadow. You would like that, wouldn't you?"

Dustil nodded and said, "Whatever you wish, my Lord."

I smiled. "Good, let us be off to Manaan."

"And the Echani?"

I laughed. "Assuming he comes to Manaan, we will deal with him accordingly. But Omni is a coward. He hides behind the power of his master."

"Who was his master?" The boy queried.

I smiled. "The same master that was Malak's."

"You mean…"

"The very same, Dustil Onasi. But Revan is dead and what he worships is only a pathetic shell. But enough talk, come we will talk on my ship about how you will recruit the selkath youth into the Sith."

"A shell?" The boy asked.

"Again not your concern, boy."

He sighed. "Alright, Lord Bandon."

I could tell that the young boy wasn't really satisfied with my answer but he knew better to press me on it. Master Uthar had taught the young boy well. I only hoped that he wasn't as bad as the other dreck that Uthar had been sending Malak and me lately.

* * *

 **~Liam Mandrell~**

::Naboo::

So this was Naboo, in the mid rim but close enough to the Outer Rim world of Tatooine. However, what lay beyond the Outer Rim was anybody's guess. When I had been a young padawan, I had often been curious at what lay beyond the rim. Master Kavar, would chuckle at my curiosity about what lay on the furthest reaches of the Rim. I would beg him to tell me what he had seen in his younger days when he was a Knight and he would shake his head and said that he had seen planets with other beings connected to the Force, same as all the known worlds and beings that existed. I suppose my curiosity was the fact that I had grown up on Onderon and had known nothing else save the world I had been born on.

Signing up with Revan and her crusades against the Mandalorians had changed my mind about people and things beyond the rim. After Malachor V, there were mysteries out there that as far as I was bothered could stay mysteries. The Mandalorians had come from those regions and after fighting them I had enough of them and most sentients to last a lifetime.

Naboo seemed peaceful enough. Yet everywhere I tread I felt no peace within me, my dreams were haunted by the war. When it was quiet, I heard the screams of the dead. I wanted peace but there was none to be had. Peace, for me, was a lie, as much as I wanted it there was none to be found. I needed a drink. Now my home planet of Onderon was denied to me, thanks to Minden Ravenheart. I was left a wandering refugee without a home and with no place to rest my head. As a Jedi, I could have at least counted on the various enclaves, temples and various outposts the Jedi had.

Since my exile that was now denied to me. The Jedi weren't totally heartless, after my exile I was given a small number of credits and told to make a life elsewhere. I had blown that small amount on drinking the strongest drinks possible and getting home to Onderon. I had a feeling that the credits were a gift or a favor to me from Master Kavar. If it had been left to Master Atris…I would have probably been tossed out of an airlock. She always hated the fact that I had a relationship with Revan. She had told me the day I left for the wars that Revan would be my undoing. Little did I know that after the war, she had been right. Yet, I had loved Revan and her desire to accomplish what was right despite the fact she went against the Order to fight against the Mandalorians.

We had planned our future; we would marry, she had said. We would marry after the war was over. Yet, as the war dragged on, Revan's whole personality seemed to change. She became harsh, jaded, and her light and mirthful personality became filled with a gallows humor that I found slightly distasteful. We grew more and more distant. I feared the war was turning Revan into a woman I no longer remembered. She loved me once, but it soon became painfully evident that Revan loved victory and power over the Mandalorians than me.

By the end of the war, I was used as a diversion. A lure to lure Mandalore's fleet to Malachor V because Mandalore did not think Revan would risk her own lover to a deadly fate. My diversion had worked, and Bao-Dur activated the mass shadow generator. I should have died in that terrible vortex of gravity that pulled both Republic and Mandalorian fleets towards the planet and smashed them into pieces. Not to mention the ground assault on the planet itself. The whole planet was considered sacred ground to the Mandalorians. Revan had dared the Mandalorians to come upon the planet when she dispatched troops to desecrate the planet itself. She laughed darkly when she contacted me that final time and said it was what the Mandalorians deserved for ruining our galaxy. All I know is that after I nodded meekly to Bao-Dur to activate the mass shadow generator, I felt so much pain and death I paled and passed out. I woke up and to my horror found that the Force was gone from me. It felt like being shot with a numbing agent and feeling nothing when someone poked a tender spot.

Regardless of what I felt or didn't feel, I needed a drink. The alcohol was enough to keep the horrors of war within me quiet. This had been the longest I had been sober and if I didn't get a drink soon I'd probably end up a nervous wreck. Where was a drink when I needed one? Naboo was still a fairly new colony world and settlers and refugees came to this world looking for a new start. I had managed to beg a ride from a freighter captain and offered to help him with his cargo. With the cargo now unloaded, I was free from my obligation. Yet, I had no money for any drinks. I was left wandering pretty aimlessly from the city to outlying farms and communities. Most of the settlers held blasters to me and told me to get lost. These settlers probably were used to seeing refugees from the Mandalorian Wars and the war that Revan and Malak waged against the Republic. I wondered if I would ever find some place to rest for the evening.

"Hey, mister...you're trespassing..."

I looked around to find a young chestnut haired boy that looked about five or six holding a blaster. Great, now children are aiming weapons at me.

I sighed. "Look...I had no idea this was someone's…"

I heard a woman's voice and a woman holding a blaster. It was pointed towards my head. She had fiery red hair and a fierce green eye. Her other eye was covered with an eye patch. "Well, you know it now…this is Naberrie Winery."

I held up my hands. "Look...I have no desire to get into a fight Ms..."

"Ms. Phoenix Naberrie."

Well. Ms. Naberrie. I am…"

She glanced at me oddly. "You're a Jedi, aren't you?"

I sighed. "Not really."

"You wear their robes and even if yours are tattered and soiled...I've seen plenty of those robes to last a lifetime."

Well, at least the woman wasn't shooting at me. Maybe it was best not to argue with her. "Fine...I am...well I was a Jedi."

She then smiled and lowered her weapon. "I owe the Jedi my life. What's your name Jedi?"

I sighed. "My name is Liam, Liam Mandrell and I am not a Jedi. Well maybe I was at one point but...I am not a Jedi anymore."

She shook her head. "Still I owe the Jedi a debt...that and my husband and they refused to take any payment for my treatment."

Treatment? What was this woman going on about? "Look lad..."

She cut me off. "Please call me Phoenix. I haven't seen a Jedi in years and...well I owe some deal of hospitality to the Jedi."

Well I did need a place to stay and this woman was offering but I felt guilty about taking advantage of this woman and her family's hospitality. I was not a Jedi despite the fact I wore a few old soiled robes of a life that was dead to me.

I felt a wet spot and the kid who held his blaster at me grinned and he fired his weapon at me again. I noticed that the blaster he used squirted out water. I should have realized the blaster was a toy.

I sighed. "What's your name, kid?"

He straightened himself out and said calmly. "My name is Van. It's short for..."

Phoenix suddenly stated, "Van we had this conversation about your name. Unless you want to get teased or bullied."

Van sighed. "I know...but you still yell out my full name when you're angry with me. Like the time I was late from school."

"And I was worried sick about you, Van. This still is a wild planet, the gungans are fierce beings. They could have kidnapped you."

"C'mon mom, the gungans haven't attacked since the queen and them reached some sort of...agarment..."

Phoenix interrupted. "That's agreement, Van but that still doesn't settle my nerves that you did not come home right away."

Van sighed. "But my cousin Tam and me, we just wanted to try and tame a Fambaa or a Kaadu."

Phoenix shook her head. "And what would you do with one of those creatures?"

Van grinned. "Play gungans and settlers of course."

"I don't get it what fascination you have trying to play war. Besides, the gungans were here first. This is their native planet. There has been enough war in the galaxy, Van."

I nodded. "Your mother is right, Van. War is not a matter of games."

Van snorted. "Oh come on, you're a Jedi...mister. Surely you've fought in a war before."

I sighed and bent down next to Van. "I've witnessed enough war to last a lifetime, kid. It's not a child's game."

The woman turned towards me. "You fought in the war with Revan, didn't you?"

Van's eyes glistened. "Wow...you fought in the Mandalorian Wars...how many filthy Mando's did you kill?"

Phoenix's one eye glared with anger and she said firmly. "Revan Kalon Naberrie...don't you dare talk about people's lives like that."

I looked at the kid. Revan. Oh, you had to be kidding me. Yet, the kid probably was born after Revan had won the war. It made me wonder how many kids in the universe bore my love's name. I also briefly wondered how many had also been named Malak. I could see dozens of people deciding to name their kids after those two war heroes. As for any kid named Revan, considering how odious that name now was most parents, as Phoenix clearly demonstrated, ended up calling their kid Van. Other parents if they felt daring enough, might call their kid Rev. In all likelihood, nobody wanted to admit that naming their kid Revan or Malak was a big mistake.

Van protested. "But you call them filthy…"

She coughed. "Go run in and get cleaned up for supper, Van."

Van sighed. "Yes, mom..." His shoulders slumped and he ran off.

Phoenix looked contemplative for a moment as if she was trying to recall what she had stated to me. She then said, "I kind of figured as much considering how you seemed very adamant in telling Van that war wasn't a game. I..." She sighed."If I could have been a Jedi or even a Republic soldier...I would have joined with Revan and fought against those filthy Mandalorians. But I did what I could...and look at me, Jedi. It cost me a lot."

"The Mandalorians took your eye?"

She shook her head. "No...but...I rather not talk about it."

I chuckled. "I understand completely, Phoenix. I don't particularly like talking about the war."

She managed a good-natured smile. "You're welcome to stay for dinner, Liam."

"I don't really deserve..."

Phoenix sighed. "No, but you look like you've been through hell, Jedi."

I sighed. "Look Phoenix, please don't call me a Jedi. I was exiled for following Revan."

Phoenix paused and looked contemplative for a moment. "You're still a Jedi, Liam."

"No, I am not."

She rolled her eyes, well at least the one eye she had. "Frack, you're stubborn. You fought with Revan. You helped to save us from the Mandalorians that makes you better than most of your kind that sat around doing nothing. To me that makes you a Jedi."

I suddenly got enraged. "But I don't have the Force, Phoenix. I lost it. It's my punishment for joining Revan."

"You don't genuinely believe that, do you?"

I said nothing and she sighed. "I see you do. I know you'll probably disagree with me, but I am a refugee. My family was killed during the war. Without Revan and the Jedi who did join him, it could have been worse. And yea, I know Revan became some sort of warlord afterward but...still...before all that...Revan was a hero...and you're a hero, Liam whether you choose to believe that or not. How could you think…." She paused a moment. "You did what was right; how does that equate being a punishment? I may not understand all this Jedi stuff...but...that doesn't seem right to me? Do what's right and...be punished?"

I sighed. "Phoenix...there is a reckoning for life taken and lives lost. And I spent so much of the war taking life…" I paused, why was I talking about this with a total stranger? Yet, she seemed adamant in claiming I was a Jedi when I wasn't so I sort of owed her some sort of explanation. "The Force decided it no longer wanted to be a part of me...at least that's the theory I have as to why I no longer have it."

She sighed. "You seem well...judging by your clothing, like another refugee. I can't imagine a veteran of the war would be such a vagabond. It doesn't seem right either."

I chuckled. "Well, Revan became Darth Revan, and that's probably a good reason as to why no one wants to honor a broken exiled old Jedi."

Phoenix nodded. "That's true. But I respected Revan and Malak, at least the ones that weren't some sort of warlords bent on taking over the galaxy. Course I can't talk like that around most people, because they would all think I am nuts or something. But you look like you could use some help, Liam. Maybe a hot meal, a bath, a job of some sort. At least till you get back on your feet."

"And that wouldn't be right. I couldn't take advantage of your hospitality. I just couldn't. And I am kind of...well pathetic. I won't lie to you. I am a drunk. I haven't drawn a sober breath since...the Order exiled me."

Phoenix chuckled. "Today's a good day to turn over a new leaf, Liam. Besides...I use to be a drunk as well. I know, you think the alcohol is going to wash away the pain."

I frowned. "And you work with it?"

She grinned. "Crazy, I know. But it's all I know. It's what my parents taught me...that and being a smuggler. But my smuggling days are over. I sort of ran up some bad debts with the hutts and...they sent a bounty hunter after me. It nearly killed me, and I guess in some small way, I am dead. I married my cousin and got rid of my past. If I didn't...I am pretty sure Calo Nord would have come after me and killed me."

I froze. "Calo Nord...The Terror of Taris? Frack, didn't he kill just as many people as the iridian plague?"

"Yep, that's the one. Anyway, come along and have dinner with us, Liam. And you can tell us some of your war stories. Sorran would love to hear tales of the Jedi and I know Van would too."

I sighed. "I suppose I owe you something for your hospitality even though I really don't like talking about the war."

She nodded. "I know...but getting it off your chest might help, more than you know."

 **~00~**

I hadn't had a decent meal in months because I drank most of the time. The Naberrie's seemed to be decent enough company. I tried so desperately to be a good guest...tried not to get drunk... but...the wine flowed freely into my glass and the more I talked about the war, the more wine I ended up drinking. Phoenix was wrong, getting the war off my chest only made things worse.

I felt bad, guilty. The young boy glanced at me with a wide-eyed expression. I gazed at him sadly. I could not control myself. I handed him a wooden loth-cat I had carved and he looked at it. "Wow...a loth-cat. Thanks, mister Liam, sir."

His mother seemed to be far more compassionate than she should have been. Her husband shook his head and glanced at me with an annoyed expression. I was glassy eyed and how I managed to hold onto consciousness was beyond me.

"Phoenix what is it with you...inviting every single refugee to our homestead?"

"Because Sorran I was once a refugee too."

Sorran shook his head. "I suppose you plan on offering him a job. Can't you see he's a bum?"

Phoenix glared at him. "Listen here Sorran I think...I think I made a mistake. Sometimes I am so fracking dense because I told him to talk about the war but…"She paused."It's like when I talk about my family and Deralia…I have bad dreams and..." She sighed. "Look...let me try...to help him out."

"What if he doesn't want help, Phoenix?"

"Then we will have to call the authorities and have them kick him out...but he needs help...I can't help but think this is my way to pay the Jedi back for all they did for me when I was wounded."

Sorran sighed. "Alright...we'll try and assist him...if we can. I don't like this, Phoenix. Taking in a stranger like this...we're not a refugee support center. There's plenty of those places…"

She spoke. "Yea...I've seen some of those places when I was a smuggler. Like on Nar Shadda, the Exchange takes advantage of them and refugees end up being slaves. No thanks, Sorran. We will try and see if..."

"You're not a Jedi, Phoenix."

"No, I am not...but I can't help but feel I would have been dead without the Jedi's help. We have to help him."

I groaned, how could these people take me in? It made no sense and I passed out.

* * *

A/N: And this ends my chapter. I wanted to do a Dustil, Omni, and Bandon chapter. I also wanted to do something unique with Dustil and not have him sitting on Korriban. Most people tend to write with the idea that Dustil ends up trying to hide his past and his father. However, this time decided to use his identity and have Malak and the Sith take advantage of it in some form or fashion.

I also wanted to connect to some of the other characters on Korriban, etc. I also wanted to focus in on my Exile as well as meet the "Real" Phoenix somehow. Next should be either one or two en route to Manaan chapters. I want to thank my loyal readers for sticking with me and my story.


	74. Chapter:73:Ebon Hawk: Midway to Manaan

**Chapter: 73: Ebon Hawk: Midway to Manaan**

 **~Canderous~**

I watched quietly as Phoenix carefully went through all the motions of Echani martial arts. Her movements were graceful and poised it was like watching a dancer dancing. And then her lightsaber came forward and the laser sword hummed and danced with her. Her fighting with no opponent near her, it was a beautiful warrior's dance. She looked at peace in the combative dance she was performing. How could a simple smuggler…think she was just that...a simple smuggler? There was no way, for Phoenix to be who she said she was. It simply was not possible. A woman with perhaps a month or so of Jetti training was able to perform the combative movements of someone who clearly had years and years of training.

I sighed and tried to push past her naivety, I wanted her to realize that she wasn't fracking Phoenix. "You ever been to Eshan, Phoenix?"

Phoenix shook her head negatively. I chuckled lightly but kept my musings to myself. It was abundantly apparent that Phoenix had trained with an Echani somewhere in her past. I figured maybe as Akume since she had been with Revan. Revan had insisted that all his troops learn the fighting styles of the Echani.

I stepped in front of Phoenix. "Enough graceful warrior's dancing, Phoenix. Fight and spar with me." I took out a vibroblade. "And don't worry about slicing the blade into pieces, this blade has a cortosis-weave to it."

Phoenix nodded, and she proceeded to advance on me. She surprised me though, instead of striking with her lightsaber she gave me a good strong kick right into my stomach. It knocked the wind out of me, and I laughed. "Oh, I see how this is going, weapons or Echani blows then."

She grinned and turned her weapon to a training setting. "Anything goes, Canderous, within reason of course. Just don't try and take my head with your blade."

"I am your father, Akume…unless you have committed a crime against clan, I will not take a clan member's head."

She rolled her eyes. "Anything is possible and don't call me Akume. It's Phoenix, yea I realize you think I am some woman named Akume, but I am not."

I sighed. "Phoenix…you are not who you think you are!"

She grinned. "Nah...I am a hutt in human form, Canderous or…I know..." She stood tall and erect. She placed her hands on her hips and said, "I am Darth Malak."

I shook my head. "Damn it, Phoenix...everything is a joke to you. I am being serious."

"Look Canderous, are we going to spar or not? Besides, since when are Mandalorians known for their oratory skill?"

She did have a point. "Fine...less talk more fighting."

I brought up my blade and slashed at her leg. She blocked it and her lightsaber hissed against my vibroblade. She then yawned. "You're getting old, Canderous."

"You're too damn overconfident, Phoenix." I swept my leg and foot under her legs and knocked her down on her butt.

She laughed. "I asked for that, didn't I?"

She quickly leaped up back on her feet and slashed at my face. I blocked her blow, and she suddenly shoved me into the wall of the ship with her blasted Force. "That's cheating…"

She chuckled. "You never said that I couldn't...and a warrior fights with all the weapons and tools that are available to them. You know that…Canderous. You know that in war there are very few rules. If your people had rules, my parents and my brother would still be alive. Your people made war on civilians. Your vaunted Cassus Fett destroyed the cathar, Juhani's people. So don't tell me that me using my Jedi powers is cheating. Would you deny me my advantage? Besides you probably fought plenty of Jedi during the war and I doubt they had any qualms about using the Force on you, your clan and any others.

I snorted. "Yea I did. But that doesn't mean I have to like you using your mystical Jetti powers like that. And your vaunted Republic isn't so innocent either. The worlds we attacked...the worlds we razed. Many of the Republic defenders were cowards. Hiding in the homes of civilians. Using families as shields. Thinking we would not use appropriate force on their bases inside major cities. They underestimated our resolve and what measures are acceptable in war. Those who cannot defend themselves should not be around those who can in battle. If annihilating a city is the kind of power, it takes to overwhelm a Republic shield device, then that's what we did. Necessary force to destroy all opposition."

Phoenix stated firmly, "Then don't accuse me of cheating...Canderous and don't deny me what I must do to win in combat."She folded her arms and said,"It is only called cheating by those who are not strong enough to take on their opponent in the first place."

Phoenix had a point and then I said, "Hah...now you sound like a Mandalorian."

She then grinned. "Does that mean I win?"

I growled. "Now wait a minute...I never said you won. You pompous arrogant Jedi."

"If I am pompous and arrogant, what the frack does that make you? Will you yield to me or not?"

"Mandalore may have yielded to the Jedi Revan and Revan may have caused my people to yield to him but I won't! I will never yield to a damn Jetti, not even you, Phoenix!"

I came forward and lashed out in anger at her throwing wild blows. She quickly side swept my blows. I threw blows at her legs, and she leaped out of the way of my blade.

"Frack...Phoenix...fight me!"

"Not when you're angry like this. You want to win...fine...you win."

She extinguished her blade and then gave a bow before me. "The fight is yours, father..."

My jaw dropped, and I heard a chuckle and saw Jolee with a grin on his face. "She just made you look like an idiot, Mandalorian."

I sighed, the old Jedi was right. Phoenix had defeated me by not even throwing a single blow in our sparring match.

Phoenix looked at me and said calmly, "I could have killed you...Canderous...father. A person in a berserker rage is easier to kill then one who is fighting rationally. It is one thing to use anger to empower you but it is quite another to contain that anger and not let it distract you. I am not saying it can't be done but…it is far easier to goad someone to anger and use it against them…that is why I did not wish to fight you, Canderous."

She smiled and then said. "I am done fighting for the day. I enjoy practicing with you...Canderous…maybe we can fight more later on."

I grumbled, "You're too much of a damn Jedi at times, Phoenix. You think you can face Malak that way and win?"

Phoenix sighed. "No...I don't. But that fight will be for keeps, Canderous. It will be my head or his. But you're my adopted father, Canderous. I..."She paused."I enjoy our fights, our sparring and our talks. But this time, my father, my friend...you are mistaken. I will face Malak and even though I may die in the attempt...I will save the Republic."

"A foolhardy scheme, Phoenix."

Jolee nodded. "I agree with the Mandalorian, although probably not in the same way."

Phoenix frowned. "What do you mean, Jolee?"

Jolee sighed. "Well...this fixation with saving the Republic...it obviously drove Revan and Malak to extreme methods and caused Revan and Malak to fall to the Dark Side."

"The old Jedi is right about seeing this in a different way. This loyalty to the Republic you have Phoenix, I don't get it. You're from the Outer Rim…since when does a gal from an Outer Rim world give a damn for the Republic. They weren't exactly around when your world was attacked and your family was killed. Why do you care about the Republic?

Phoenix scrunched up her face in deep thought and then said. "I get what you say, Jolee. Revan and Malak's obsession over saving the galaxy ended up causing them to fall. What power or means one takes for one's goals is a good question. I...I honestly don't know what means I'd go to save the Republic, Jolee. I...I want to do what is right."

Jolee nodded. "Well, kid just don't get too obsessed trying to do what is right. Because what you see as right may not be what's right for everyone else."

"I'll think about that, Old Man."

She turned towards me. "And Canderous, why do you care about your own people? Mandalore took your people into a war that ended up with your people broken and scattered. He thought he was strengthening your people but in the end, you ended up in a condition that was a lot worse. And to top it off with Revan and Malak's war, two societies have ended up broken, your people and the people of the Republic. I..."

She looked contemplative and then answered, "I get the feeling like the galaxy has been played for saps, Canderous. Perhaps...Bastila was right about what she said about the Order saying there was a greater threat that Revan and Malak couldn't see. Someone is playing a long game with us all and we are all suffering from it. Anyway, to answer your question: why do I support the Republic? Because if the Republic falls, then it won't matter what happened in the past to my home or even to your people. Malak won't show any mercy to your people or to those who show any form of loyalty to the Republic. He will grind their bones into dust till there is no one left. That is why I support the Republic, Canderous."

I sighed."You've done a lot of thinking over this, haven't you…Akume?"

She glared at me for using the adopted name I had given her, the name I had given her to so desperately reclaim the person she was. "Stop calling me that…I am not Akume. I am Phoenix."

She took off, and I shook my head and looked at Jolee. "Why won't you tell her who she really is? It's obvious you know who she really is."

Jolee shrugged. "Do you honestly think she'll believe me? You ruined anybody's chance of revealing to her who she really is and her believing it."

I shook my head. "That may be, but she deserves to know the truth. How can she go on thinking she's someone she's not when…"

Jolee raised his hand. "She's got to learn and accept this on her own. You're a Mandalorian, you know that sometimes the most difficult lessons of a warrior must be learned on one's own."

"Is she...is she anything like the person she once was or is she different?"

Jolee smiled. "The humor is the same if you must know. Some of the same personality quirks are still there. Some of her motivations are the same. Whatever the Jedi did to her...they couldn't fundamentally destroy who she was, yeah her memories are scrambled like a bunch of eggs but that doesn't seem to stop her from doing what she wants or even thinking like she once did. She's got the same stubborn streak that I've always known but...it's like the Jedi pushed a restart button on her. They've given her a chance to think through things without the complications of..." The old Jedi sighed. "Anyway...I hope you like sushi, Canderous since that's probably going to be what we will be eating on Manaan soon enough."

"So just let her be...and hope it all shakes out on its own?"

Jolee sighed. "I know you loathe that idea, Canderous...but eventually she has to figure it out. She's close...closer than you realize. She's not dumb. She's always had a sharp mind but it's that sharp mind that's also holding her back. But eventually, she'll come to recall who she is and what her destiny is. Just be patient."

I watched as the old Jedi wandered off. For a man that claimed he wasn't a Jedi, he sure acted like one at times. The same annoying cryptic talk and all that stuff about destiny. It was no wonder Akume was so fracked in the head, there were too many damn philosophies for her to keep track of. Regrettably, he was right, I had pushed too hard on Akume and...well hopefully, she'd figure out who she was.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I looked around the cargo hold. What a mess! There were pieces of gizka and shedded wookiee fur all over the cargo hold. I sighed as Bastila handed me and Juhani a couple of mops and buckets full of cleaner and water. "Hey...I didn't sign up for this. I am a slicer. Not a maid!"

Bastila looked at me and Juhani. "This ship is our home for now and you and Juhani were responsible for our situation with the wookiees on our ship. Now stop complaining and clean up this cargo hold. We may have need of it in the future."

"Oh, yea...You ain't much older than me, miss high and mighty! Just 'cause you're some Jedi doesn't mean you can be a prissy little…"

I felt a little shove and I ended up being pushed down on the floor. "What the... I thought…Jedi didn't do that..."

Bastila had a slight smile on her face and I glared at her. "That wasn't funny."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mission. Get to work on cleaning up the cargo hold and please do try to be less clumsy in the future."

I shook my head and Bastila went off. "You're awful quiet, Juhani. What's up?"

Juhani sighed. "This place is a mess and Bastila is right we need to clean this place up. We are responsible for it."

"Yea but Nix would never make me clean up this place."

Juhani chuckled. "You don't know that, Mission. Besides part of being a responsible mature adult is cleaning up after one's messes."

I snorted. "Is that a crack about my age? Look Juhani...I am mature enough."

I heard a laugh and saw Nix. "Mature, huh? The only thing mature about you, Mish is that like most adults you don't want to clean up your mess and rather complain about it."

Juhani chuckled. "That is true, Phoenix. Most sentients would rather that someone else ends up cleaning the mess rather than do it themselves."

Nix nodded. "But this place could use a good once over and not just the cargo hold but the whole ship. It could use some good deep cleaning. Besides, it will pass the time before we get to Manaan. If you take on the cargo hold...I'll take on the cockpit and..."

I snorted. "The cockpit...no way that's just an excuse, so you can be with Carth. We can handle the cockpit and the main hold. You can handle the dormitories and the med bay."

Nix sighed. "Fine…and I'll see if I can get HK and T3 to handle the engine room, communications and garage. I doubt I could get Canderous or Jolee to do anything."

"Well see if you can get Miss Prissy Jedi girl to do something for a change rather than order us around."

Nix laughed. "I'll try…"

"Hey, I thought Jedi didn't believe in that...that you're supposed to do...not try."

Nix winked at me. "Well...I am not most Jedi but I'll give it my best shot."

I laughed. "Till Mustafar freezes over, right?"

Nix ended up chortling at my statement. "Mustafar...yea...I doubt it. I am not holding my breath with Bastila."

She wandered off and I grinned. "Okay, Juhani…let's get to work on this cargo hold."

Juhani shook her head and I frowned. "What?"

"I think Phoenix just tricked you, Mission."

"Nix tricking me? Don't be absurd."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I stood before my two droids and handed HK-47 a bucket and a mop.

"Get moving, HK...take this mop and some cleaner and get cleaning."

Expletive: Damn it, master I am an assassination droid, not a janitor.

T3 started beeping and deeting in what I could only imagine was laughter.

HK then stated. Statement: I would not laugh you annoying tin can. Not unless you wish your inner parts removed.

I laughed. "HK is right about laughing, T3. This ship is a mess and needs cleaning. I also need you to help clean this ship and you're going to be right beside each other cleaning."

T3 gave a low moan. Dwoooo…

I grinned. "That's right T3. You and HK together, cleaning this ship up."

I could only imagine what might be lurking around this ship, after all, it did belong to a crime lord. It probably still had some mysteries hidden behind the bulkheads.

"Anyway get moving both of you, clean this dump of a ship up and the one that cleans the fastest gets a full lubricant bath."

HK suddenly spoke. Statement: A lubricant bath would make my parts move much more efficiently, master and increase my killing ratio by at least thirty five percent.

T3 suddenly chimed in ::Phoenix, my gears also could benefit from a lubricant bath.::

I laughed. "I don't doubt it. Anyway have fun cleaning up the communications, the engine room and the garage."

T3 beeped back ::There is supposed to be fun in this? :

I chuckled as I moved off to the cockpit, even though Carth was in the cockpit I was pretty sure I could recruit him to help clean the Hawk. I was getting ready to move to the cockpit when Bastila crossed my path. "Phoenix, can we talk?"

I rolled my eyes, what did she want to talk about? As far as I was concerned Bastila, and I had nothing worthwhile to talk about. "Unless this is about you scrubbing the deck plating then, we have nothing to talk about."

Bastila sighed. "I see...but Phoenix…"She paused. "I've had a lot of preconceived notions about you and...well, I was mistaken about you. It's hard for me to admit that...despite all that we've gone through you seem to be a lot stronger resisting the Dark Side then I thought."

I wasn't certain if I should be insulted and upset at the thought that Bastila thought I was lost to the Dark Side or not. However, I needed to recognize that she was trying to apologize. I lightly grinned. "What? What was that you said?"

Bastila rolled her eyes. "Honestly, Phoenix. I am trying to apologize, yet again. Why do you have to make these things so difficult?"

"Gee...maybe it was the whole I was a step to you being a master thing. Maybe the whole I think I am better than you sort of mentality you had, and then there is the fact that…"

Bastila sighed. "I get the point, Phoenix...but you do not have to rub it in."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

What went through Revan's mind? I often wondered despite the fact we were bonded to each other. Phoenix...err Revan did her best to try to hide and obscure her thoughts from me. Sometimes she was slightly successful other times not so much. Right now, I could tell she was annoyed for my apologizing to her as well as insulted. I could tell as hard as she was trying to conceal it from me that she was worried about various things. Yet, she had pushed such feelings to the side. This whole cleaning thing was like her with her drinking earlier. Some diversion to prevent her from thinking too hard about what was bothering her. Plus there was the fact that she would not even express to me these feelings, but she would tell Carth or even Jolee. I was pushed to the side and not even considered a friend or even something more. I blamed having a brief relationship with Revan for such antagonistic feelings between the both of us. How exactly could I mend that rift? Or was it too late?

Phoenix teased and joked about my apology. I sighed. "You make any apology I give sound painful, Phoenix."

She grinned and nudged me in the arm. "Well… I am sure it isn't as painful as having a rancor bite. But..." She paused, "You could do me a favor."

"A favor?" I raised an eyebrow. She was toying with me. I was certain of it. She knew...deep down she knew my affections and she knew I would do anything to please her or even placate her. I was hopelessly drawn to her like a shadowmoth to a flame.

"What sort of favor?"

She smirked and said. "Help clean this ship, it's not an activity that should be limited to droids or Mission and Juhani, by the way."

I felt trapped. If I said no, she'd likely say something sarcastic that would make me feel like the biggest heel ever.

I sighed. "I suppose I could help Mission and Juhani."

Phoenix chuckled. "That's the spirit, Bastila. By the way…congratulations!"

"Congratulations?"

"Yea for proving Mission and me wrong. We both thought you were too much of a...well... fussy princess to help clean."

I snorted. "I am not a princess."

Phoenix shook her head. "You could have fooled me, Bastila. Look…if you don't help to clean then you prove you really are a 'Jedi Princess.'"

I let out a sound of exasperation, why did Revan have to be right? I walked off, and she laughed seeming to be amused at my whole frustration. I heard, even more, chuckles as I sulked off and saw that damn Mandalorian laughing as well. He must have been witnessing the exchange between Revan and me. I glared at him. "This isn't funny, Mandalorian. I don't see you cleaning the ship."

He shrugged and said, "I am not a cleaner of ships, I am a warrior."

I suddenly laughed as Phoenix came near him, she had a mop in her hand which she handed to him. "Well, warrior…attack that dirt in the garage and report to me when you're finished."

Canderous grumbled, and he raised an eye at her and Phoenix held up her hand. "You heard me...this ship needs to be cleaned. Bastila thought of it by the way so you can thank her."

Canderous gave me a dirty look and muttered Mandalorian obscenities under his breath. Revan laughed. "And no disparaging insults to Bastila's parentage, Canderous. Now get to that garage and clean it. This ship is our second home and a warrior needs a clean place to lay down his head."

Canderous took the mop and muttered even more Mandalorian words and obscenities. Phoenix responded in a very harsh tone, "You'll think I am worse than Malak if you don't finish cleaning. Now get to work."

The Mandalorian grumbled and wandered off.

I suddenly felt better. Revan...well Phoenix's cleaning rampage and humor wasn't just limited to me. It was spread equally around. I smiled and Phoenix grinned back. "I am not a hard woman, Bastila. I just expect everyone to pull their weight around here and before you retort back on what I am going to do. I plan on cleaning this ship as well."

"Now…" She chuckled. "I just need to think how I can get Jolee to pull his weight around here. But first things first, I am planning a coup against Republic" She then sauntered off, a slightly lustful grin on her face.

I shook my head. I could feel Revan's pull towards Carth. If I had only restrained my passion against Revan the first time, I could have said something about how inappropriate her relationship was with Carth, but I couldn't. Damn it all, this was all Revan's fault. She had managed to seduce me, so I couldn't say anything without her biting my head off about being a hypocrite. My fists clenched in anger but then I took a breath, unfurled my fists, and muttered. "There is no emotion…there is peace."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

"Oh Republic..."

I turned in my seat in the cockpit to find Phoenix. A slight grin on her face, I was still suffering a bit from the hangover I had from that all night drinking binge we had. She sighed. "No offense, Republic but you look like hell."

"I can't bounce back as quickly as you can, Phoenix."

"May be I can help with that."

She sighed and placed her hands on my forehead. I suddenly felt a great deal of warmth. Sweat started dripping down my forehead and then she folded her arms around me and she kissed me. I doubted that was part of the healing process but who was I to argue with my little Raven kissing me. The warmth went deeper within me and the headache and sluggish feeling I felt burned away. She released her lips and smiled. "Better?"

I merely nodded, she always managed to take my breath away. I gently caressed her hair and smiled. "You're so beautiful, gorgeous."

She shook her head. "That's either an after effect of me burning off the hangover or…I am going to say you're a hopeless romantic, Carth."

I chuckled. "Guilty as charged, sweetheart."

She looked as if she was musing over something and then sighed. "I hate asking this of you but...could you...could you help clean up around the ship? This whole ship probably needed a good cleaning back on Dantooine but it never really got it. Plus…" She grinned."I bet this ship has some secrets to it, I mean it did belong to a crime lord after all. Wouldn't it be fun if we discovered something interesting while we were cleaning it?"

I laughed. "Are you hoping to find spice or something?"

She grinned. "Well, you never know what we'll find. Maybe we'll find a whole bunch of credits or something. I mean...it's all fine and good being a generous Jedi and all but...credits do make the galaxy go around."

"No arguments there, my little Raven. So yes, I'll help you clean up the ship, even if all we find is two half cred chips in the process."

She smiled. "Thanks, Republic I absolutely knew I could count on you. So…now the only one I've got to get helping around this ship is Jolee."

I laughed. "Good luck on that, Phoenix. From what I've seen from him, he acts like he wants to be part of the crew but doesn't. Maybe it's best to let sleeping rancors lie."

She sighed. "You're probably right, but I hate to see everyone else working their butt off and him just sitting around."

"Well he is an old-timer, he probably thinks he's entitled to sit around. I seriously wouldn't worry about Jolee, my little blackbird. If it's an extra person, you need to help us clean, I'll see if I can get Jordo to help out."

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "Uhh...Carth...he looked pretty strung out from what I could see earlier. And I may have been able to clear your hangover but I don't think I can clear his because...well...it seems I can only help people close to me or I have a connection to. I don't really have a connection to Jordo."

I sighed. "Probably explains why I haven't seen him around too much, he's likely trying to sleep off the hangover."

Phoenix nodded. "I haven't seen him either, but he is your friend. I'll let you deal with him however you see fit."

I smiled and stroked Phoenix's hair again. "Of course, love."

I move out of the cockpit to look for Jordo. I found him in the communications blister trying to tinker with the comm system. He didn't look too well, but he managed a sheepish grin. "Carth...umm, I've been tinkering with this damn thing and I think…"

The comm system suddenly sparked and died.

I cringed at Jordo's attempt to repair the comm and he sighed. "Sorry…"

"Jordo, what on the twin suns of Tatooine were you trying to do?"

Jordo looked slightly remorseful. "Trying to contact Lydia, she deserves to hear from me."

"Yea...but you shorted out the comm system. I know you love Lydia, Jordo but...now no one can use the comm."

"I suppose I better try and repair it."

"I'll try and fix it Jordo...I think you better go and..."

I didn't want to hurt Jordo's feelings but it was obvious that he wasn't thinking too clearly. I paused trying to think of the right words. "Look, why don't you go get some caff and lay down."

Jordo nodded and left me with a mess. So much for helping Phoenix out with the ship when I was stuck cleaning up the comm system.

I quietly worked on reconnecting wires, and I heard.

 _Captain Carth Onasi…repeat...Sith monitoring transmissions…_

It sounded like Admiral Dodonna the transmission seemed distant and hard to hear and full of static and incomplete phrases.

 _Smuggler…Phoenix…Star…Jedi…know...be careful...Carth...dangerous...mission...enemy…Phoenix...Dark…Lord…Sith...Rev..._

I tried connecting more wires to clear up the feedback, send back a response and another pop and the transmission died. I sighed. "Damn it all..." I kicked the console.

Phoenix was obviously in danger but then that was evident considering that she was going after the Dark Lord Malak. Yet it apparently was serious enough that the admiral was trying to contact me.

I looked at the mess of wires. I seriously didn't know what Jordo was thinking trying to repair this on his own. We had T3 but T3 belonged to Phoenix and seeing how she was right now about cleaning this ship, T3 was more than likely occupied.

Phoenix seemed to sense my frustration as she popped into the room. "What's the matter, Republic. I could sense your agitation a klick away."

"Well…Jordo messed up the comm system and now I have to work on repairing it and I can't help you clean up the ship."

Phoenix laughed. "Is that all? I thought…well, I thought it was the end of the galaxy or something. You know, Carth being a worry wart doesn't become you."

"Cute, Phoenix, real cute. I am not a worry wart."

She grinned. "Yea, you are…"

"Isn't there someone else you can harass for a little while?"

Phoenix scrunched up her face and looked thoughtful. "Well…not really. I'd rather harass you, Republic. Although…harassing Bastila can be fun as well"

I shook my head. "Anyway Admiral Dodonna was trying to send me a message something about you, the Jedi, enemies and the Dark Lord of the Sith."

"Sounds like she wants an update, Carth. It makes sense since you are under her authority like I am under the Jedi's authority but...the Order wanted secrecy on our mission, and it's a good bet that the Sith are monitoring our journey. The fact that they sent two Dark Jedi and Calo Nord against us is proof that they know what we are up to. I wouldn't be a bit surprised that Dodonna was trying to give you intel about Malak's plans to try and thwart our mission."

"But what intel, Phoenix?"

She shrugged. "Your guess is as good as mine, Carth. We are simply going to have to keep our eyes peeled and keep ourselves sharp on Manaan. But don't worry about cleaning the Hawk. I can manage. You work on getting the comm system fixed."

"But what if I can't fix it? I am not a tech."

She patted me on the arm. "Then don't worry about it, we can worry about fixing it on Manaan. Just work on getting it functional, so we can notify Manaan when we get there that we're landing. I'll send T3 to help you out when he's finished cleaning. I would normally send him now but...he and HK are in the middle of a cleaning contest. I am not about to interrupt those two. T3 would think I am sabotaging his attempts. Anyway...have fun trying to fix the comm system."

"I hardly call fixing the comm system…fun."

She laughed. "I imagine not."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I sat in the med bay a flurry of activity going on around me. Revan's droids were cleaning, and I could hear the chatter of the young twi'lek and the cathar Jedi as they yammered while cleaning. This was just as amusing as seeing Revan win a combat without striking a single blow against the Mandalorian. I pretended to be busy by looking at medical texts, there was no way Revan was going to pull me into the menial chore of cleaning the ship.

I heard a cough and there was Revan looking at me with a surly look on her face. "Stop being lazy, Old Man. I seriously doubt that looking through old medical texts is that important."

I snorted. "Not to say that you go leaping into the path of blaster fire or anything, but I know how you young people get. My learning how to treat you and your crew's wounds is beneficial, Phoenix."

She snorted. "I have a hard time believing that old man."

I handed her about five herbal remedy kits I had made. Hopefully, that would shut her up. She looked them over. "I am impressed. Can you make anymore?"

"How many could you possibly need? And besides, I don't have enough supplies on me to put some more together. Ask me later when you're actually in need and I'm less tired. I'm not a kit factory, you know."

Revan rolled her eyes. "You're tired…yea...sure…right? You sure as hell weren't tired when you took on the creatures of Kashyyyk. Look, if cleaning the ship is degrading to you..." She paused and dug into her bag. "You seem to have a knack for healing. I am not that great at it. Here..."

She opened her hand and produced a holocron. I raised an eyebrow. "Where did you get that? It looks oddly familiar."

"A Jedi master named Jula..."

"Master…Jula a master! Well, son of a wookiee's uncle, last I remembered…" I paused, I didn't want to talk about my past, particularly with Revan.

Her eyes lit up and she said. "Come on...tell me...how do you know Master Jula Jax?"

I snorted. "I am not in the mood. My life is not an open book, kid. And besides... you don't really want to hear about me. We're talking ancient history, probably before you were born. History bores kids. Proven fact."

She sighed. "Fine...I'll let you be for the moment. But I have got a feeling that this holocron would be more helpful to you than it would be for me. I am not a healer, Jolee. But I'd appreciate you using it and then reveal to me a few…well, tips."

"The Force doesn't work like that, Phoenix. There are no shortcuts to its use." I handed back the holocron to her. "Now you better take the time learning how to use it...or I will definitely not make any more kits for you or the crew."

Her face scrunched up in a pout. "Fine, but if I have to learn some obscure healing techniques you can just as easily clean the med area."

"Are we _still_ on that?"

Revan smiled. "Look, clean up the medbay and only the medbay and I promise I won't pry anymore of your history out of you."

I snorted. "Until you decide you're bored and you decide to pester me some more."

Revan chuckled. "Of course, Old Man, I wouldn't have any fun if I didn't pester you. If you haven't noticed, I pester everyone about the same around here. You really should have thought about your decision about coming with me if you thought I was going to be a sweet innocent Jedi padawan. Anyway...I'll give you some peace if you clean up the medbay."

"Fine...I'll clean up the Medbay, if it gets you off my back for awhile."

She smiled. "Thanks, Jolee I knew I could count on you."

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

I sighed, I watched as Mission and everyone around me cleaned the Ebon Hawk like it was some sort of purification ritual. I just wasn't into it at the moment. I missed Wrrljiykam and I left Mission and the others in the midst of their cleaning. I sat in the mess poking at a bowl of gray porridge.

Someone plopped down beside me and I didn't know who it was because I was too focused on missing home. Their hands ruffled my fur and I turned and found Phoenix Star was the one sitting next to me.

"Zaalbar, I am sorry I dragged you away from your mate and your home. I told you earlier...that I was more than willing to release you from your obligation to me."

I barked my response. "You need me, Phoenix Star. You may not notice my watching eyes, but I know you are troubled in spirit."

She gave me a deep profound sigh. "Can't pull the wool over your eyes, can I?"

I shook my head negatively and then responded, "You use...your Outsider humor to keep the darkness of the Shadowlands at bay. I notice this from you, Phoenix Star."

She was quiet for a moment seeming to debate over what she wanted to say. She finally said, "Well, I'd appreciate if you don't go telling others about it. That's all I need is others worrying about me, I have enough going on without people knowing I have…issues."

I barked, "Of course not, it would not be appropriate for me to say anything to the others."

She nodded. "I know I've been asking others to help clean the ship, but...I can tell you're not really in the mood, Zaalbar. I know because well...you're not eating."

I took a small bite of my food and then barked, "You have seen more than I would have allowed and taught me some things too. I am grateful for that. You and I have important things to do, Phoenix Star. When I finally come back home, it will be because whatever task we have is finally done."

She smiled. "Alright, when that day comes...I will insist that your life debt to me has been fulfilled, and you will go home."

* * *

 **~HK-47~**

My master's behavior core undoubtedly had to be malfunctioning somehow. I was an assassination droid, not a janitor and yet here I was cleaning along with the other pathetic meatbags on this ship. I moved the mop around in a bucket of cleaning solution across the Ebon Hawk. Meanwhile, that annoying tin can kept beeping and deeting in laughter as he watched as I cleaned.

Annoyed statement: One more beep or deet out of you, tin can and I will remove your behavior core from your processors.

The tin can responded. ::Do that, and our Master will deactivate you.::

The astromech was right, unfortunately, my master was disgustingly bent towards peace and pacifism but then I analyzed an alternative course of action.

Calculated statement: You are correct, tin can...but you could accidentally end up deactivated yourself. Accidents can happen on this ship, as I am sure you are acutely aware of. My weapon could...accidentally go off, and you could accidentally be in the way. You then end up switched off. Of course, our master might suspect otherwise but...by then it will be too late, and you will have lost the lubrication that you and I both so desire.

The astromech gave a low moan of disapproval but then was quiet and went on to work cleaning the ship.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I proceeded on my promise that I would help clean up the ship. I had a feeling that cleaning this ship was important to the crew. I knew that cleaning the ship would encourage us all to develop a sense of pride for the Hawk. I didn't care what the Jedi said about pride and attachments. All sentients needed to take pride in one another and take a sense of satisfaction over a well-maintained ship. Cleaning the ship developed an attachment that we all needed.

There was strength in connections and attachments that the Jedi denied. I could feel it as the crew worked to maintain the ship. Carth puttering away to try and fix the comm, Mission cleaning up wookiee fur and gizka muck. Juhani seemed to be chuckling at Mission's whining over cleaning up the mess the wookiees had made. Bastila seemed to be cleaning because of some twisted sort of devotion to me. I sighed, I felt slightly ashamed I had a relationship with her. I had caused so much confused and twisted emotion within her. I wanted to help her but how? Every time I tried to be near her I seemed to make her even more agitated and even more confused.

 _She's got to make her own path, Phoenix._

Great, Revan. I thought...well, you've been quiet lately. And yea, I do realize that Bastila has to make her own path.

 _I saw no reason to bother you, Phoenix._

Wonderful. I suppose you'll be nagging me soon enough about something. You always do, Revan.

Revan chuckled. _Of course, but not right now, you're way too busy being domestic._

Funny. I am not a domesticated woman and Force-forbid the person who makes me one.

 _Not even for Carth._

Don't you even go there, Revan.

Revan laughed. _The things people do for those they love._

I snorted and then started to clean underneath a bunk. I found what looked to be a bunch of twi'lek dancing clothes, slave collars, some credit chips, and empty Tarisian ale bottles. I didn't want to think what the hell, Davik did on his ship before we had it. With these items, I could think of probably a dozen things that they were used for and none of them legal.

I grinned as I dug out a full and unopened bottle of Tarisian ale. This could be valuable in the right hands. I slipped the bottle into a hidden compartment I had also found. No sense in letting anyone else know about it. I looked underneath the other beds, and I heard. "Nix..."

The next thing I knew as I tried to crawl back out from underneath the bunk, I slammed my head hard against the paneling. I gasped and darkness filled my vision…

* * *

A/N: Finally, this chapter is at last done. It's taken me forever to write because I had a terrible writer's block trying to write it but I am content with the chapter. It's taken me quite a few hours of playing KOTOR II. I was sincerely hoping to get this out May 4th or May 5th but writer's block kept dogging my heels. Heh.

I have mulled over the next chapter but next chapter will more than likely will be a Malak chapter. He requires some attention since he hasn't had much action in the past few chapters. Malak will probably be a solo chapter with his own POV. I might slip in Saul Karath as well, not sure. It will be a short chapter, though.

The domesticated Phoenix is a joke to Kosiah regarding a domesticated Bastila, both are kind of absurd in so many ways. So I sort of figured the alter-persona of Revan in Phoenix's mind would make fun of her and her cleaning spree.

My writing may become much more sporadic in nature because I am going to Culinary School. I aspire to be a chef actually and no I won't perform any Swedish Chef impersonations either as amusing as that may be to some people. :P

Ether: Dustil was rather fun to write. I was going for the right mixture of mature as well as hormonal and angst driven teenager. Omni's background is chilling. And part of his turning maybe due to the Jedi Master who sent him against Revan in the first place. But that's another story for another chapter later on. As for Liam and the true Phoenix...they may end up meeting Revan and the crew later on, or they may not. I haven't decided on that yet.

Vienna Logan: Yea as I said about Dustil to Ether, slightly mature but still angst hormonal teenager. Hopefully, someone straightens him up before someone gets hurt. :)


	75. Chapter 74: Leviathan: An Elixir of Hate

**Chapter 74: Leviathan: An Elixir of Hate**

 **~Malak~**

Soon Bastila would be mine. Her young innocence would be mine to control, to mold and to shape. I had seen pictures of her from Intel and her skill in the Force...was almost as powerful as my old master. Not quite, but almost. Yet, I did not want anyone as an apprentice that was as powerful as Revan. Revan's power frightened me, even when I was a young boy. I so desperately wanted Revan to love and respect me. However, Revan seemed so oblivious to me. I worshiped her the moment I saw her in the Jedi Temple, she was like a dark-haired angel of mercy. As much as I hated my old master, I begrudgingly accepted she had saved my life and gave me purpose.

I stared intently at Bastila's holo image. It was as if Bastila was a younger version of Revan. Slender, dark-haired. I could not control Revan but...I could dominate her. Laughter filled my head. Damn it not now...why now?

 _So you'd replace me with...her. Amusing, most amusing, Apprentice, considering your feelings for me. And what makes you think you can manipulate her? That's why you were always a filthy slave, apprentice. You tried to claim your dominance over me and failed. You are even deluded to compare my features to some bratty padawan. We look nothing alike at all!_

I suddenly laughed. Slave, I am no slave, Revan. I did succeed, I was the learner...now I am the master.

 _A master of what, Malak? A master of insanity._

I am not insane.

Revan laughed. _No...but you are having a conversation with your master, a master you thought was dead. Denial of insanity is generally the first sign of insanity, Apprentice. But...perhaps you're not talking to me at all or maybe you are?_

What do you mean by that?

 _As if I would tell you…Apprentice…_ Her laughter suddenly got louder and then faded away. Damn Revan, damn her manipulations and damn her plotting. She had been deposed and still, somehow she managed to bother me. Oh, how I loathed and despised her. I was right to get rid of her when I did and become the master of the Sith.

I exited my meditation chamber. I had sent my apprentice Darth Bandon on a mission to capture Bastila and kill Revan. The intel our spies had gathered was that Revan had overthrown Czerka slavers under the influence of the Jedi on Kashyyyk. What was she doing? This sounded highly irregular, why would Revan care about the damn affairs of some damn primitive primates? However, my spies suspected that Revan was being forced by the Jedi to find the Star Maps and saving the wookiees was just a cover that the Jedi came up with to cover that fact.

Bandon's mission also relied on demoralizing Revan. The rumors from the Genoharadan spies I had sent not to kill Revan but to monitor her mentioned that Revan was having a relationship with Carth Onasi. Ahh, Karath would be upset to know his lover had found love in the arms of another man. And not just any man but a man who apparently had served under him during the Mandalorian wars. Whatever feelings I had for Revan so long ago, I had trampled under my feet, just like the trappings of the Order I had abandoned for the power of the Sith and the Star Forge. Nothing would satisfy me more than to stab Karath in the back with this knowledge. Yet, perhaps it would be far crueler to let Karath go on thinking Revan was still a faithful lover to him. Yes, let the admiral believe what he wished. I could only hope that when the time came, Revan would crush his heart. She had certainly done that to me several times. She spurned me for Liam and then afterward she spurned me for Admiral Karath. Oh, how I still wanted to kill Liam. Yet, he had disappeared and I had no idea if he was alive or dead as I could not perceive him in the Force. However, perhaps...I paused in thought. Yes, there might be someone who could track down the Exile and bring me back his head.

I received a transmission from my apprentice that he had retrieved his hostage. If Dustil Onasi didn't kill his father as was planned. Bandon had orders to eliminate the young man and if possible right in front of his father and Revan. Nothing would have satisfied me more to see that, to see the Republic soldier squirm in horror and then see his spirit crushed. Yet, even better if his son killed him. I could picture the young sith adapt his blade skewering his father right in the chest and his father glancing in horror at his own son killing him. Revan, assuming she had feelings for the one she had taken to her bed would also be devastated. Love was a weakness and if it marred Revan so much the better.

As I entered the bridge, an entourage of Dark Jedi, Sith acolytes and such were waiting. Amusing, they were like Tuk'ata hungry for blood. They looked at me with a measure of fear and hunger. They were waiting for their orders to hunt for Jedi to capture them. My eyes fixed on Toka Jin, he was one of the first to join Revan during the Mandalorian Wars. He did not look like much, the war had taken its toll on him. His back was bent in an awkward manner and he looked frail and gaunt. His hair was kept braided into many-layered braids. Yet that frail and helpless look was deceiving. Somehow he managed to defeat everyone who challenged him. Most of this bunch stood out of his way, he had gained a reputation of being deadly. I motioned for him to come speak to me alone. He followed me into my private chamber. He walked with a gimpy walk. His voice was raspy and he struggled to speak. It was as if his throat was pained to utter the words. I was often annoyed by his raspy and difficult to follow voice.

"Lor...d Mal...ak. I ser...ve you... Wh...at is... it you... wis...h me... to do... for...you? Do you... wis...h me... to kill Re..van?"

Something about this man made me nervous. I did not trust him. Yet, he had a talent of sniffing out Jedi and other Force users. He was a hunter pure and simple, a predatory creature.

Sending him on a mission was the best way to get him out of my way. Keeping him around was dangerous and yet sending him off was also dangerous. I decided I preferred sending him away from me. Would Toka challenge me? I doubted it, but someday he might. A Sith had to be careful of all rivals. Something about him seemed off in the Force. "No...Toka. I've sent Bandon to deal with Revan. You are to find Liam Mandrell and kill him.

Toka hissed. "Th...at won't be ea...sy my Lor...d. He is dead in the For..ce. I can not sen...se him. No matter how har...d I stretch out my sen...ses."

"You are a hunter, Toka. I am willing to acknowledge that of all the acolytes here you would find him."

"Why do... you... wi...sh him, dead, my Lor...d?"

I glared at him. "It is not for a servant to question one's Lord why...they are to follow."

Toka bowed or attempted to bow. His back was crooked and he nearly tipped over. How did such a man survive? There was something that this man was hiding because how did such a feeble looking man not end up dead? Any other Sith Acolyte or Dark Jedi should have been able to rip him to shreds. He answered in that raspy voice. "For..give me, Lor..d Mal..ak but if I am to find Li..am? I need a point of refe...rence, a feel...ing, an emo...tion to guide… my sen...ses to him."

So was that how Toka hunted? I would be sure to close off my emotions and feelings from him. He managed a grin and his mouth looked like a gaping dark maul. I glared furiously at the man. "My emotions and feelings are not for your pleasure, Toka Jin."

"A...pi...ty. Li..am...is...a...bro..ken...man. A sur...vi..vor...of Mal...a...chor...V. I...am...fam...il..ar with it...it is...beau..ti...ful...to...me. So...mu..ch...pain, suff..er...ing. Like...a sweet nectar...of the...Dark...Side.."

"One of Revan's most remarkable accomplishments. But I don't wish to discuss Malachor V. Toka...what is it about that planet that fascinates you, anyway?"

Toka emitted a raspy coughing laugh. "I...saw...it...lived it...Lor..d...Mal..ak. But...per...haps...this is the...key...if...I go...to Mal...a...chor V...per...haps...I...will find...trac...es...of...Li..am. Enough...to find...what's left...of him."

I shivered. I had a bad feeling sending Toka to Malachor V. Yet, keeping Toka close to me was a terrible idea and sending him away was a bad idea. Yet, if I wanted Liam dead...then sending Toka was the only way to do so.

"Fine...go to Malachor, Toka. Provide me a report of what you sense when you get there and if it is indeed possible to find Liam from all that destruction."

Toka bowed and hobbled away. Laugher filled my head. Not again.

 _You have made a mistake, Apprentice. You have allowed a viper to go to Malachor V and have it make it its lair. Did I not tell you that Liam was already dead? Why bother with him? Toka Jin is dangerous and you know it._

Yet you kept him around, Revan.

 _Ahh...but I kept him away from Malachor and away from it's influence. Liam, if he had devoted more time on Malachor, he would have realized that his strength could be found on Malachor and so would Toka and now more so. However, he has always been useful, Apprentice. A hunter like that was invaluable to me. He could sense Jedi and trap them like a Kath hound scenting an iriaz. But I never let him go to Malachor V to let him go back there was to awaken something we all should fear. He was able to sense the Padawan Bastila...but then I suspect you used him to help lead me into a trap._

I laughed. Yes, Revan. You would be right...but how do you know all this?

Revan laughed. _Nice try, Apprentice, but you cannot get rid of me. I know what you know and what you did to me. I plotted my revenge accordingly. You sprung my trap so beautifully, Apprentice. Now you are stuck with me haunting you, and you'll never know why because I will not tell you!_

You're not the real Revan, the real Revan...she's…she's somewhere with the Jedi heading to Manaan.

Revan laughed. _Who said I was the 'real' Revan? It suffices that I am here to torment you. Do you think I wouldn't have planned for you betraying me? Betrayal is the way of the Sith, Apprentice. So I planned accordingly. Even if you were successful in…killing me. I had intended this. Now it is my pleasure to slowly drive you insane...bit by satisfying bit._

I will discover a way to get rid of you...Revan...even if you are only a reflection of the real Revan.

 _Oh, I doubt that, apprentice. Getting rid of me...is far more complicated than you realize. Assuming you find out how. No, I am afraid you're stuck with me…the only way you might get rid of me is…_

Find the real Revan...and get her to stop it.

 _Yes...but I doubt she would even consider doing anything to stop this, Apprentice. Besides, you betrayed her. Why would she…we even consider helping you?_ She laughed and laughed.

Anger stirred within me, I would find Revan and I will make her tell me what she did to me!

 _I did nothing, that you did not do to yourself, Apprentice. Remember...you tried killing me, did you think I wouldn't strike back, that I wouldn't plot my own form of revenge. Revenge is the way of the Sith._

I stormed out of my chamber and ignited my lightsaber and plunged it into a nearby terminal in anger. Damn Revan, Damn the Jedi who recovered and saved her. They would pay for causing me this much trouble. Damn the Jedi Bastila, who apparently spared Revan's life. The Dark Jedi and Sith nearby glanced at me in mix horror and fascination and I said firmly, my voder echoing as I spoke.

"We will take Dantooine, whatever Jedi we cannot capture and break we will kill. We will destroy the planet for being home to the Jedi. We will teach the Jedi to fear our might. After we take Dantooine, we will capture the Jedi Bastila and she will join us or die."

Veranda the fosh spoke, "Lord Malak...we will obey...but...may I stay and speak with you?"

I nodded and looked at the others. "Go…prepare our forces to take the planet."

The others left, leaving me and the fosh alone. She spoke. "My tears did not help you, my Lord?"

I shook my head. "No, Veranda. She persistently continues haunting me."

Veranda chuckled. "Revan was always a proud woman, Lord Malak. Perhaps the issue as I once thought is not with you after all."

I hissed. "Of course it isn't me, insolent fosh. I am not insane!"

Veranda shrugged and her feathers suddenly shifted colors to a gray color. One that I could read as annoyance. "Of course not, Lord Malak. But I thought my tears could at least…"

"Well they didn't, your manipulation of such things didn't work. Make me more tears, Veranda. Your tears powered with your strength in the Force. I command you to make a poison, not a fatal one but a strong one. One aggressive enough to break the Jedi Bastila. When it comes time to break her, she will have no choice but to embrace the Dark Side."

"Ahh...so you seek to erode her will. That will be difficult, Lord Malak. Such poisons and alchemy belong mostly to the ancients. I must concentrate and focus my meditations accordingly to produce the right tears."

She came closer to me. Her feathers suddenly changed to green and then orange and red. Her emotions were...I raised an eyebrow. She was aroused by me. She then said, "If you feed your hate and anger through me, Lord Malak and we combine our emotions together...I should be able to provide the right tears to break the Jedi Bastila."

"That sounds rather…personal and...intimate Veranda"

She chuckled. "Hate and desire to break a common enemy often are, Lord Malak. Such things require a bond in the Force itself. It often makes one vulnerable, as both parties learn each other's secrets, their desires."She bowed her head."But...I am willing to submit to such a thing."Her beak opened in an approximation of a grin."I am...yours to command, Lord Malak. I will deny you nothing."

I laughed. "I imagine you wouldn't, you insolent fosh. I already denied such to another."

"Former Knight Toka Jin. Is that what you asked him to do, to help you break Bastila? And you refused him? Yes...he feeds off emotions...and the strengths of others. This is why he is so good at finding Jedi and also breaking them. I am astonished you did not ask him to direct the attack on Dantooine."

"No, I sent him on something a bit more personal."

Veranda hissed lightly, "See, I told you...hate and desire to break a common enemy is a bit more intimate."

I furrowed my brow at her for that was all I had left to indicate a frown. "And why do you seek to bind yourself so intimately to me, Veranda?"

She squawked in what could be interpreted as a giggle. "I find you pleasing, Lord Malak..." Her taloned fingers brushed gently against my face. "And I felt your desire for me...Lord Malak. Earlier…when your admiral came to talk to you."

My pale features suddenly lightened in a semblance of a blush embarrassed to admit that I felt something for this strange avian creature. I sent a bolt of Force lightning as I was angry that the fosh would bring up something I was loathed to admit. Her feathers were singed and instead of screeching in pain she only laughed in a squawking manner. "I have a high tolerance towards pain, Lord Malak. If you seek to take your aggression out on me, I shall only enjoy it."

What a twisted creature! What exactly did Veranda want? She seemed so cold and manipulative but something about that delighted me and made me desire her. Yet, I had to check and see how close and loyal would she be to me.

"You wish to be my pet, Veranda?"

She chuckled. "Many of my species have been called such, Lord Malak. But humans have inevitably have been the stronger species over my own, including you and Revan."

"Why did you join us during the war, Veranda?"

Veranda smiled gently. "I was but a Jedi Padawan...I saw potential in you and Revan. You were knights and there was much I knew I could learn from both of you. So I joined your crusade. I wanted you and Revan as my masters. I knew there was a great deal I could gain which I could not have within the Order. Lamentably, Revan is dead…so only you remain. I have learned a great deal in your service as well as Revan's."

"You didn't care about the Mandalorians?"

"There were a nuisance...nothing more nothing less. I knew that you and Revan could eliminate them with ease, and I could learn far more from the both of you than from the masters in the Order."

I raised an eyebrow. She seemed so confident that Revan and I could defeat the Mandalorians at a time that even Revan and I doubted we could. However, what amused me was the apparent disloyalty she had even as a padawan towards the Jedi. This intrigued me even more. I laughed. "You never were that devoted to the Jedi, were you?"

She also laughed. "Certainly not, Lord Malak. Is it wrong to admit I wasn't?"

"No, you realized your potential and ours before even I or Revan did." I felt content that Veranda would be loyal to me, enough to be whatever I wished her to be to me. "Very well, Veranda, you shall be my pet and you shall serve me. Yet, pets can be disciplined and if you displease me I will discipline you."

She squawked once more with a giggle. "I told you I have a high tolerance towards pain. If you "discipline" me, I shall enjoy it."

I grasped Veranda by her taloned hand. "Come pet...I shall enjoy...our...partnership."

"And so shall I, my Lord….my Master."

I stroked her talon hand as we went off to my chamber.

* * *

 **~Saul Karath~**

I had been summoned by Lord Malak, he had something he wished to direct me towards. I knew what he wished, though. The rumors had been spreading on this ship that Malak was planning an attack on Dantooine. I had a feeling this meeting was a formality more than a command.

As I entered Malak's chamber, I was met by Veranda, she squawked in amusement, "Admiral Karath…my master has been expecting you."

I glanced at the fosh, she wore a heavy collar and chain around her neck. I knew Veranda had wanted to worm her way into Malak's affections. The tears she had given him earlier were a start and now apparently she had become some sort of willing slave or perhaps a consort to Malak. Was there something in those tears that she had given to him that had charmed Malak? Yet I supposed I owed the fosh my life, if she had not been there earlier I was pretty sure I would have been killed. Somehow, the fosh had some sort of power to placate Malak. I raised an eyebrow. Suddenly the chain was yanked and I heard Malak hiss. "That is enough, my pet. Come to my side."

Veranda lowered her head. "As you wish, my Master." The fosh retreated and went towards Malak. She fawned over him as he sat in a chair."Master…good master...what shall I do for you now?"

"You will speak only when I wish, my pet."

Veranda squawked in a giggle. "As you wish…Master."

I watched as Malak scratched her beak and she seemed to be enjoying it. I shivered. I never did like that fosh. Something about her seemed too willing to please Lord Malak. Yet, who was I to point this out? If I valued my life, I would keep silent. I tried to direct my gaze away from Malak and from the fosh. As he scratched her beak, she made contented-sounding squawks.

Malak spoke, "Admiral...prepare the rest of our fleet to go to Dantooine. We will invade the planet, take Jedi captive and then firebomb the planet as we did on Taris."

"As you wish...Lord Malak."

He held up his hand. "Also...Admiral, how does the pursuit for Revan and Bastila go?"

"I have heard little from your apprentice, but it has reported that Revan's ship is headed towards Manaan. We can do nothing at the moment, Lord Malak. If we enter Manaan's planetary system with our full fleet, they will deny our Kolto shipment. But...if they are headed towards the planets they are for the reason we think they are then it can be assumed that they will no doubt be headed to Korriban after they leave Manaan. We must prevent Revan from betraying our secrets. We cannot let her reach the Star..."

Veranda suddenly spoke. "Forgive me for speaking out of turn…master but...isn't it strange that Revan is going after the Star Maps in the first place? It's as if..."

Malak pulled on the chain and Veranda squawked suddenly and he interjected, "Silence…no one asked for your opinion, my pet."

Veranda said softly. "Forgive me once again…master...but assuming that Revan knows where the Star Forge is. Why is she even bothering with something she already should have?"

Malak frowned or rather his brows furrowed in an approximation of a frown. "I see what you mean….my pet. Hmm...we need to investigate this further. Admiral Karath, my pet and I will be leaving for Dantooine soon. You will blockade the hyperspace route from Manaan to Korriban. When you capture them...you will interrogate Revan and find out why she is going to the planets that have the Star Maps. You will let me know what you find out, won't you Admiral?"

"Of course, Lord Malak."

I left the chamber and sighed, the fosh was correct. Why was Revan going back to places she had already been? Something was amiss, why was Revan helping the Jedi? Why was she going to planets if she had the maps already? Was she stalling? Was she trying to lure Malak away from the Star Forge so she could reclaim it? Nothing was making sense…nothing at all. Were the Jedi threatening to turn her over to be judged and condemned by the Senate? Malak wouldn't save her. I knew that. I took a deep breath, I supposed I would have to be like Exar Kun and save Revan before the Republic condemned my little Raven to death. Revan couldn't die...I couldn't let them kill her. I loved her. Despite the fact that I was under Malak's thumb, I had to do something to keep her away from the conspiracies of Malak, the Jedi, and the Republic. I returned to my bridge and informed the fleet of Lord Malak's intents of splitting the fleet into two. One to take Dantooine and one to take on a certain ship that would be heading toward Korriban.

* * *

A/N: And as I said this chapter was going to be a short chapter. I hope you enjoy it. I am pretty sure most people know who Toka Jin is. :) As for the fosh…well, I've always have had a fascination with that particular Star Wars species for a long time. Anyway next chapter...will be Manaan.

Either: Yeah…Jolee is going to nag Canderous continuously about "Phoenix" not believing anyone about who she is. He nagged him on Kashyyyk about it and apparently Canderous is too thick to realize it yet again. Heh. Blame that stubborn Mandalorian nature of his.


	76. Chapter 75: Manaan: Bumpy Landings

**Chapter 75: Manaan: Bumpy Landings**

 **~Carth~**

When Mission came running into the cockpit, the blood drained from her features. I could tell automatically that something was wrong.

"Carth...it's Nix...she's hurt...she's hurt badly."

"What! She was cleaning...how in...never mind."

I went running into the room to find Phoenix sprawled flat, a piece of metal from the bed frame, had grazed part of her head when she bumped into a corner of the bed. The corner of the bed frame had blood on it where Phoenix had hit her head.

Bastila came running into the room as well. Her face was furrowed in worry. She bent down next to her and her hands moved gently getting a sense of Phoenix's injury. She sighed and muttered softly almost inaudibly but I was close enough to hear the words. "Not again..."

Again? What did Bastila mean by that?

Did Phoenix end up hurting her head before? Jedi training? I frowned. "Bastila...is she going to be alright?"

Bastila was still looking over Phoenix and said, "The wound looks superficial, Carth. I hope…."

"You hope what...Bastila?"

Bastila was silent and then Jolee and Canderous entered the room.

Jolee snorted. "So the kid has a bump on her forehead the size of a meteor...it's not the end of the galaxy. She'll be fine."

Bastila frowned. "Jolee...bumps like this can be serious."

"Look Bastila...I know bumps and bruises...I fought the Sith, you know and had to treat a lot of people for various cuts, scrapes, and bumps. Phoenix is fine. Sometimes I think you worry way too much."

Bastila looked kind of dismayed. "I...well I fought the Sith as well...Jolee and...I am telling you a bump like that can be serious."

Jolee bent down and seemed to be taking in Phoenix's presence in the Force. He then took a few kolto patches from his pack and gently applied the patches to Phoenix's forehead. "She'll be fine...it's not like...she" He paused a moment and then said, "ended up in a major firefight on a damaged ship or walked through a load of thermal detonators. All she did was bump her head on a bed frame. She's going to be fine."

Bastila paled at Jolee's words and then said. "But all it takes is one little minor bump and...there could be memory problems or worse."

I nodded agreeing with Bastila. "Phoenix bumped her head pretty hard when we first met...she bumped it on the escape pod when we were evacuating from the Spire. It really knocked her for a loop. She had blood coming from her head like she does now. I am beginning to think she has really bad luck when it comes to keeping herself from getting scraps and bumps on her head."

Canderous snorted. "Enough of this...we need to stop gawking and chattering over her like she's some sort of laboratory experiment and get her into the med lab so she can recover."

Mission nodded. "I agree with Canderous on this, guys. I just feel like this was kinda my fault. If I hadn't called out for her then Nix wouldn't have..."

Bastila put a hand on Mission's shoulder. "It was an accident, Mission. You called out to her and you know Phoenix...once she is focused on something it is hard to drag her back into the current moment."

Mission looked a bit sheepish. "Yea...she does seem rather driven, doesn't she? But I was going to tell her that Juhani and I finished cleaning the cargo hold."

There was a beeping noise and Juhani peaked her head in since the dormitory was getting crowded. "We are coming upon Manaan." She paused and looked at everyone gathered in the room. "Is...is Phoenix okay?"

With Juhani was T3 and HK-47. T3 beeped as well but I had no clue what the droid stated but HK interpreted what the astromech had stated.

Translation: The petulant garbage can states is..the master alright? And I concur, is the master alright. If anyone has harmed the personage of the master, I will blast them.

I answered. "She bumped her head. She should be fine." If only I was as certain that she was as fine as those words I spoke, but I knew that damn droid, it was extremely possessive over Phoenix and if I said otherwise the droid was likely to go berserk.

Bastila sighed. "Again as I have stated the wound is superficial...she should be fine."

Juhani seemed to take the news fairly well. She nodded and then sighed. "I...wish there was something I could do for Phoenix, but..." she paused. "I will go and meditate…since there is nothing I can do. I hope she gets better." She walked off quietly and seemed to be the only person in the whole group that seemed resigned to Phoenix's condition and seemed oddly at peace towards what had happened.

HK retorted. Statement: If something bad happens to the master…

I quickly responded, "She'll be fine...HK. Relax."

Phoenix's prone form suddenly jerked forward and thrashed quite violently. She suddenly started moaning and shivering as if she was in sheer terror.

Bastila's eyes went wide and I frowned. "What's going on Bastila?"

HK was quiet but seemed to take in the exchange with me and Bastila.

Bastila sighed. "She is having another vision, Carth."

I glared angrily at Bastila. "Visions shouldn't have one terrified or moaning like this….Bastila. She had some sort of vision or something back on Taris and she was injured then. What the frack is going on here? Why is Phoenix having these visions? And don't give me this bullshit that it's the will of the Force that she's having these visions. And it seems to me every time Phoenix has these visions, she's unconscious or suffers some sort of injury. I don't like it."

I loved Phoenix and seeing her in such a vulnerable manner distressed me terribly. Something wasn't right here. Bastila didn't seem completely forthright and I grabbed Phoenix up in my arms. She felt hot to the touch. Damn it, another fever like she had on Taris. I kissed her gently on her forehead. "It's going to be alright, love. As soon as we get to Manaan, I am going to have the doctors at the Republic Embassy look you over."

Bastila paled and looked slightly dismayed at my words but said nothing.

I shook my head. "Bastila, she's burning up!"

HK pressed forward wanting to take Phoenix from my arms and I said to the droid, "Back off...droid. I've got this."

HK deferred but said firmly, Statement: The master trusts you, meatbag. So I will obey you in her stead but if she gets worse…..

Jolee held up a hand interrupting HK and then said, "Calm down, both of you. It's the vision causing the fever. she'll be fine when she wakes up."

T3 moaned dismally in response.

Bastila sighed. "Jolee speaks the truth...Carth and HK. Phoenix...I can sense her fear...her terror...it's what's causing the fever."

I looked at Jolee, the old man had been glancing over medical texts earlier and I trusted his judgment "You're sure...absolutely sure...that Phoenix will be alright."

Jolee nodded. "I give you my word, Carth. I've treated lots of people as a medic during the war with Exar Kun. I've seen similar things like this. She'll be fine."

"I hope you're right, Jolee. I...love her and to see her suffer like this...it's tearing me up inside."

HK retorted, Statement: You better be right, old meatbag fart or I will blast you for lying.

T3 beeped as well and HK responded. Agitated statement: Don't tell me to calm down you stupid little tin can. You were just as concerned for the master as I was.

Jolee sighed. "Just treat the fever, Carth and she'll be okay."

I exited the room with Phoenix in my arms. She was still moaning and trembling in my arms. Canderous, the droids, and Mission followed me as we took Phoenix to the med lab.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I looked over at Jolee and said softly, "Thanks, Jolee."

"Don't thank me, kid. I..." He paused."All I can think of after the doctors figure out who she is is how out of sorts she'd be in a Republic cell with them calling her...Revan." Jolee paused again and then sighed."She doesn't deserve that, kid. You need to tell her who she is."

"I can't, Jolee. I have my orders from the Council and I intend to obey them."

"Until what end, Bastila? And since when does a Jedi "obey"? Don't you know what that sounds like?"

"Look, Jolee...if I do tell her...what if she decides to reclaim her old life? What if she becomes Darth Revan again? Since the moment we began our mission she has not acted like a Jedi. I've tried to give her the benefit of the doubt but...I honestly fear for her...I fear the Dark Side will swallow her both body and soul. She doesn't deserve that, Jolee. I want her to be redeemed...she deserves that. I…"

I bowed my head and said softly, "I..." I paused. I wanted to say I loved Revan but to say that was to betray everything that meant being a Jedi. I bit my lip and said, "I care for her...welfare, Jolee. I don't want her to become the Dark Lord again. I'll do anything to prevent her from becoming the Sith she once was, even if it means lying to her."

Jolee shook his head and looked as though he was dismayed at my words. "What if she decides she doesn't want that life anymore? I am sure you mean well, kid. But...look at her…she's confused...I can sense it. I know you can sense it. She knows she has gaps in her memory, Bastila. And she realizes she is potentially dangerous. She's mentioned it to me. You're causing more harm to her than you realize. You need to tell her the truth."

"You're so adamant she knows the truth, why don't you tell her?"

Jolee sighed. "I've told you before, Bastila this is your mission and your task. I didn't dig this hole; you did. Only you are responsible for your actions with Revan. You won't tell her, fine. But don't blame me if she loses what fragile balance she has when she ultimately finds out the truth. Do you think Malak is going to let "Phoenix" be oblivious to who she really is when they eventually meet? And they will meet, Bastila, it's only inevitable."

"Regardless, Jolee…I really didn't want you to tell her anyway. So don't."

Jolee snorted. "I wasn't planning to, Bastila but don't expect me to talk to you again. You know what I think you should do. But since you won't heed my advice you're not going to get any more of it. The only one that will...is Revan."

Jolee quietly left me in the dormitory, and I sighed. I looked at the spot where Revan had dashed her head. I gathered the Force around me and opened myself to Revan's vision. I wished to see what her memories revealed to me. I cringed as I felt a deep-seated terror and then a feeling of intense anger and rage filled Revan. I shivered, feeling the rage that I knew inevitably came from the Ex-Sith Lord, I knew in my heart I had been right to withhold the truth from her.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

As Carth carried Akume out of the room and carried her to the med-lab. Poor Carth was clearly troubled. He laid Akume down on the bed and she moaned and shook violently. Mission cringed as her friend shook in terror. She looked at me. "Canderous, is she? Will Nix be alright?"

I snorted. "Of course, she'll be alright. She's a warrior…" I paused."I think she fights the battles of her past, Mission."

HK stayed out of the room keeping guard along with T3. I had to give the two droids credit; they were extremely devoted to Akume, particularly HK. I had no doubts that if someone tried to attack Akume. They would end up dead.

Mission looked at me as if she was considering my warrior's past and then said, "Do you also fight past battles, Canderous?"

I pondered the twi'lek's words and then nodded. "Yes..." I sighed thinking over all the things I had done during the past. I had killed many people and not all of them were during the war. Yet, the dreams I had did not haunt me as clearly as they did for Akume. Yet, some of my memories were not pleasant.

I said to the twi'lek, "I rather not talk about it. You're too young to..."

The twi'lek suddenly snapped. "Look, Canderous...don't coddle me…I know you're a Mandalorian and..."

Jolee entered and glared at both of us. "Look, both of you...this is no time to have a spat, Phoenix needs medical attention and both of you bickering doesn't help."

Jolee's focus turned towards Carth. He seemed completely oblivious to Mission and me. Jolee said firmly, "Canderous, take over the cockpit. Carth is in no condition to fly. He's too…"

I nodded, the Republic grunt was too worried about Akume to think straight. He was slowly removing her Jedi robes to get to her underwear so she didn't overheat.

"I am going, old man...let me know...how she's doing. I…" I paused."She's my adopted daughter, you know."

Jolee nodded and as I prepared to head to the cockpit. I heard Jolee state, "Mission, make a list of what supplies we need for Manaan. Get T3 to help you."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

Mission stated firmly, "Look, Jolee...I know what you're trying to do but...Nix and I are...well, I am not going. She's my...well, she's more than a friend. We're like sisters and just because I am young...sending me away from my big sister isn't going to happen."

I raised an eyebrow, I had not realized how close Revan and Mission were. But then...Revan had a habit of making connections and bonds with everyone around her. I sighed and looked at Mission. "Mission, I know you mean well...but Phoenix is sick. She needs room to breathe and recover. It's bad enough...with Carth and me here in this tight room but...I promise I'll let you know as soon as she wakes up."

Mission began to cry and the tears came down her cheeks. "But...she's one of the few people that cared about me, Jolee. Even after what my brother did to me back on Taris and on Tatooine. How can I abandon her now?"

I sighed. "You're not abandoning her, Mission. But if Phoenix was able to talk to you now, what do you think she'd say to you?"

Mission paused and looked skyward attempting to think what Revan would say to her and then said,"Nix would tell me not to worry about her. That I need to stop being a worry wart."

Carth chuckled for a moment at Mission's words and said,"She told me that a few hours ago, Mission."

Mission dried her tears and then smiled. "Yea, that sounds like Nix, Carth. It's just that I am worried about her."

Carth nodded, and I said softly to Mission. "You know...what might help you, Mission..." I paused."Juhani went to meditate...I think she's worried as well but she uses meditation to deal with her fear and anxieties."

Mission made a face. "But I thought only Jedi meditate."

I laughed. "What makes you think I managed to survive Kashyyyk for twenty some odd years?"

Mission looked thoughtful. "Yea...I guess meditation would help a lot. I mean, no offense, Jolee but twenty years on Kashyyyk, I'd kinda would have gone nuts."

"Don't knock it off to some old mystical Jedi mumbo jumbo, Mission. I had a lot of time to think and meditate on Kashyyyk. And I think right now meditating with Juhani would help you not worry about Phoenix so much."

"Yea, I guess...I suppose Juhani could help me not feel so worried about Nix."

I laid a hand on the young twi'leks shoulder. "She'll be fine, Mission. Just...well I notice how close you two are…"

Mission folded her arms up. "And what's that supposed to mean, Jolee?"

"Look, don't pin your hopes too high on her. She's...got a lot of issues."

Carth looked up at me for a moment and frowned and I said back to him. "Look Carth, I've said the same thing well...not exactly… but I did warn you earlier about getting close to her. But you tend to ignore me...like most people on this ship."

Carth shook his head. "You know, Jolee. At one time I would have agreed with you about keeping my distance from everyone...particularly after my wife died and...Saul betrayed me and my home. But…" I watched as he gently patted Revan's hair. "Somehow meeting Phoenix…yea...I still want to do something about Saul but..." He sighed. "It doesn't seem quite as important as it once did. She's made me feel so different about so many things."

I looked sadly at Carth. Poor man. I am not sure if he would feel the same way if he knew who Phoenix was. He definitely deserved to know the truth but...then could I honestly tare apart the love that apparently Revan had for the Republic soldier? I couldn't do it. I just couldn't. I felt hollow inside, the feelings of losing my own wife drifted to the surface. Why did Nayama have to be so stubborn? I could only hope that Revan and Carth's relationship didn't follow a similar path as mine.

Mission nodded. "I know what you mean, Carth. It's like...well with Nix around...my life well...it's just been different. I mean...it's like...she makes me feel like I am not merely some...common kid from the streets. She treats me like I am someone important...not even the Beks or my own brother treated me like that. I guess seeing her hurt like this...well...I want to do something anything to help her and knowing I can't...drives me nuts."

"That's why I think Juhani can help you. She can detach her emotions. Not saying that's easy...for a cathar but...she realized earlier she couldn't help Phoenix. If nothing else, you can talk and get your mind off your worry."

"I'll give it a try...but don't blame me if I come back here to check on Nix...if it doesn't work."

I nodded and the twi'lek finally left leaving me and Carth alone.

He had a wet cloth in his hand, and he was sponging an almost naked Revan down with cold water. Her skin glistened with dampness. Carth sighed. "I feel utterly helpless, Jolee. Why is she going through all this?"

I laid a hand on Carth's shoulder. "She has a powerful destiny, Carth."

Carth looked at me with a furious expression. "That's what you keep saying. That's what Bastila keeps saying. But what the hell in the Force is going on that she has this destiny?"

I sighed. "She will confront Malak...that's her destiny, Carth. Whatever she faces, she needs you."

Carth gave me a frustrated look. "First you tell me not to get too close to her and now you tell me she needs me. What do you want from me, Jolee?"

"I want you to be careful and not...get your heart broken, Carth."

Carth shook his head. "And isn't that my affair whether or not my heart gets broken! And I think...that is Phoenix's and my concern...not yours!"

"Yea maybe it isn't my affair. And maybe you're right...maybe I shouldn't get involved in your relationship but...don't say I didn't warn you, kid."

Carth threw up his hands exasperated. "I give up...trying to talk to you is like pulling teeth from a rancor. What is your problem with my relationship with Phoenix? First, it's Bastila, then it's Canderous and now you! I love her. I want to marry her and nothing you, Bastila or Canderous say is going to stop me."

I sighed. "Carth, sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you and the one you love simply aren't meant to be together. The trick is to know when that is, to know when it's time to fight and when it's time to part ways."

Carth glared at me. "And what do you know about that?"

"Oh, I know plenty, Carth. But now isn't really the time to talk about it. Let's just say, that this old man has been in your shoes and well...love causes pain, certainly. Inevitably love is going to lead to as much sorrow and regret as it does joy. I suppose there are perfect, eternal loves out there... but I haven't seen any."

"Alright old man, I'll leave you be...and I won't pester you anymore, it's just..." he paused."I don't know what happened to you and your love… and frankly I don't care right now, but it's not going to be that way with Phoenix and me. It's just not!"

I gave a wane painful glance. "Perhaps...I hope...well never mind what I think, Carth. I see how she looks at you. I just hope it's enough...for both of you."

Carth sighed and looked over at the prone Revan who apparently was shivering now that she was uncovered. He laid a hand on her and frowned. "Damn it, now her body temperature is dropping. You said you had medical training…she needs you. I can lay aside my issues with you."

I sighed and said, "Ehh...I am an old man, Carth. And perhaps I was too gruff with you but I really don't want to talk to you about my past."

Carth nodded. "Yea...I understand. But you better not say anything to Phoenix about your past because she'll force you down and make you say something. I know...she did that to me back on Taris."

I laughed. "I will say this...you've got yourself tangled up with one hell of a woman."

Carth smiled and watched as I quietly injected a couple of med packs into Revan.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I went wandering off looking for Juhani but I went to check on Zaalbar first. I was slightly anxious because I hadn't seen him since we left Kashyyyk. He seemed okay but...I knew Big Z he had been taking what had happened on his home pretty hard. It did seem like quite a whirlwind, he had lost his brother and gotten married all in a short period of time. I peeked into the mess hall and caught sight of him with Jordo both of them exchanging conversation. It seemed somewhat strange those two together but I overheard snippets of conversation between them. The growls and hoots of shyriiwook and a calm voice in Basic.

"I...want to help your people...Zaalbar. I've done terrible things to your people. I've transported them to Czerka camps. I..."

Big Z heaved a heartfelt sigh. "You have already offered a deep service..."

"It's not enough...and that was primarily your friend Phoenix that helped you and your clan. I want to do more...somehow..."

Big Z frowned and then said, "Isn't it enough that you are with us now and not Czerka?"

I smiled knowing that Big Z was okay and left Jordo and Zaalbar to their conversation. I wandered into the cargo hold and found Juhani. She was quiet and looked deep in a meditative state and I hated to disturb her. I took a deep breath and said, "Juhani..."

Juhani opened her eyes. "Mission?"

I paused and then asked, "How can you meditate when you know Nix is hurt?"

Juhani sighed. "There is little I can do, Mission. It is during times like these that one must trust the Force. And Phoenix will be fine, as Bastila mentioned the wound is superficial. These visions...according to the council are perfectly normal for her and is due to her connection to Bastila. Carth is overly wrought, but he has a reason to be because he loves her. The vision likely would have come regardless of her bumping and wounded her head but the wound and bump probably brought on the vision sooner."

"But Bastila is worried about Phoenix, what about Bastila's worry?"

Juhani stated calmly, "Bastila is tied to Phoenix, Mission. Whatever anxiety Phoenix is feeling Bastila will feel even more intently. She will suffer from the stress and will act according to what Phoenix feels."

"I guess that makes sense. Anyway, Jolee thinks I could learn something from you, and that I should try Jedi meditation because I am troubled about Nix."

Juhani was quiet for a moment her face scrunched up and then she spoke, "Jolee is mistaken. I am a poor teacher. My thoughts are often chaotic and plagued with emotion. Sometimes it takes a tremendous amount of strength to manage to keep my emotions in check. I spend hours and hours in meditation to handle my more volatile emotions from overpowering me. It is the curse for being from such a passionate and emotionally driven race. I am always driven towards anger and frustration first. I feel so...so useless that Phoenix is in the med-lab and I can do nothing for her. This is why I am meditating, to calm my frustration. It was frustration, anger, and irritation that caused me to strike at my master."

"Gee, Juhani. You look pretty peaceful now."

"It is possible my efforts are indeed working."

I shook my head. "Juhani...I think...well I think you're wrong."

Juhani frowned. "How so, Mission?"

"Well...Nix...supported you back on Dantooine, right?"

Juhani nodded. "Yes, she did. I owe her a tremendous debt, Mission. And yet, I fear I will fail her, that I will fall to the Dark Side and that she will have to...finish what she started back on Dantooine."

"Juhani...I believe in you. I don't think Nix will have to do anything to stop you."

Juhani sighed. "I hope you are right, Mission. But I cannot teach you. You should have Bastila instruct you...she is a strong Jedi Padawan...stronger than me."

"Look, Juhani...apparently Jolee thinks you can teach me something. He didn't say go to Bastila he told me to go to you and that means he trusts you."

Juhani's fur suddenly turned bright orange in what probably was an embarrassment and her head lowered. "I am honored to know that Jolee considers me a worthy Jedi to direct you in meditation." She sighed. "Very well, I will attempt to teach you what I know of meditation. If nothing else we shall achieve whatever we lack together."

I breathed calmly and took deep calming breaths. How did Jedi manage to accomplish this all the time? I would think that all this calm meditative breathing would drive most Jedi nuts. Juhani's voice was soothing and calming, though. "Relax, Mission. Picture your worry over Phoenix as a sphere of negative energy."

I frowned. Negative energy? Juhani needed to realize I was no Jedi.

I voiced my thoughts to her. "Uhh Juhani...reality check, I am not a Jedi."

"I realize that, Mission. But focus...whatever negative thoughts you have, whatever worries you have. I need you to try and bundle them up together."

"Okay..."

I focused on all my worry. Some of it wasn't even focused on Nix. Some of it was my worry that Big Z was going to leave me after this mission was done. I would be left all alone. What if Nix broke her promise? What if she decided I was too much of a bratty kid and left me? What if the Jedi wouldn't let her keep me? What if...Carth was reunited with his son and decided that one kid was way too many? Then there was the fact Nix was injured and...well what if she laid in bed for weeks? So much worry...so many things I had no control over. I shivered in cold dread.

Juhani laid a hand on my shoulder. "I feel your worry, Mission. I am...surprised that a person…" She paused."Forgive me...I mean no disrespect but I had no idea a person of your years had so much stress."

I managed a brief smile. "Juhani I had to live on Taris and deal with that and...well... I've had years to build up a whole lot of worry during that time."

Juhani nodded. "I understand all too well, Mission. My family and I...we were on Taris as well. The rackghouls, the Vulkers, the Exchange, the threat of slavery hanging over one's head. That worry filled my life for most of my days as I grew up."

I smiled. "I had no idea you grew up on Taris."

Juhani nodded. "We have a lot in common, Mission. But back to all that worry, you have gathered around you. I want you to gradually push it out. Let it go. Take a breath and with your exhalation push all those worries out of your body."

I took a deep breath and as I breathed out I let go of the worry and my negative thoughts I had gathered. A feeling of calm came upon me. "Wow…"

Juhani nodded. "See...that feeling of calm and peace is not just limited to the Jedi but is a feeling that even a non-Jedi can enjoy. The next time you feel worry, fear, dread or even anger you can gather all those feelings up and slowly let them go. It may take minutes up to hours to eventually to feel that feeling of peace and calm. However, this technique is something that you can rely on any time you need it."

I opened my eyes. "Thanks, Juhani...you are awesome."

"I suppose...spending so many hours in meditation...I have become an expert in doing so."

"See Juhani...Jolee was right about you."

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

The ship beeped and a comm transmission came in and it came in the native language of the Selkath. Wonderful. I hated the grating noise of the Selkath language. Maybe that was another reason why my people never conquered the Selkath. Plus there was the fact that Manaan being a big ball of water was simply not worth conquering, nor did kolto have the appeal to my people. Just having to listen to the fish people was enough to give one a headache.

::Your ship will be subject to inspection. This war with the Sith and the Republic makes such an inspection necessary for the neutrality of our planet. Your crew and your supplies will be subjected to a general inspection. If there are any contraband items found on your ship, you will be fined and your contraband will be confiscated.

.

A list was sent to the ship and I looked it over.

 _Non-native Manaan animals_

 _Large shipments of weapons_

 _Spice_

 _Large masses of Kolto without a permit_

…

The list went on and on as I inspected it.

I frowned and responded. ::But it's not a safe galaxy, we have to have weapons to keep ourselves safe.::

The Selkath control responded. ::A few weapons are okay, but we will confiscate bulk amounts of weapons and any other contraband that are found.::

I grimaced. I remembered Akume had smuggled weapons in gizka. Fortunately, the wookiees had taken most of those weapons but this could give us a headache on what remained.

::Umm, how long will this inspection take?::

::A few hours to a few days depending on what we find. Once we finish going over your ship and it's cargo, we will allow you access to Ahto city.::

::Very well, Manaan control we are coming in for a landing. Please advise your medical staff we have an injured crewmate. She may or may not require treatment.::

:: Keep us informed of her condition. If there is, a concern over her treatment please let us know and we will suspend our inspection guidelines to be sure she gets the help she needs.::

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

 _::Hours Later::_

 _I felt trapped in my own body walking around but having no control over the movements that my body made. It terrified me. I found myself walking into what looked like yet again another temple of some sort. Shields shimmered around me holding back water. In the center of the room, I saw the Star Map, glowing as it opened. I cringed, at the thought of a temple that was underwater. A feeling of dread filled me. I was afraid of water as much as I was afraid of the bleakness of space and could not explain why I was afraid of water. I started_ gasping and _hyperventilating as I felt a tomb of darkness and water rushed in upon me. I was enclosed in walls of water. I suddenly pounded on the walls around me and screamed, "Let me out…don't keep me in here!"_

 _No one heard me. I felt so alone. I screamed and scratched at the walls. I tasted the salty taste of kolto upon my lips. Anger filled me, a deep-seated rage at being trapped. The rage burned within me like a fire and felt alien and strange to me. Yet...for a moment it felt like an old lost friend or a song that I had forgotten._

I suddenly gasped as consciousness came upon me. I felt cold, clammy and wet. Carth was staring at me his gaze was deep and filled with worry. "Thank goodness you're finally awake. You were burning up with a fever plus you've been out for hours. I was kind of worried you weren't going to wake up at all."

"Hours? Frack..."

He smiled gently and his hand rubbed gently across my forehead and said softly. "You must have been having one hell of a nightmare, love. You were thrashing around like you did back on Taris."

I groaned and tried to budge. "Take it easy, my little Raven. You had a pretty bad bump to your head as well."

I sighed. "Manaan?"

Carth nodded. "Yea, we've arrived on the planet. Canderous..." Carth paused."He managed to land the ship. I..." He gently stroked my hand."I stayed here with you, love."

Jolee entered the room. "Hey there, kid. You don't look too bad. You look like...well like you could rip the ears off a gundark."

I smiled and managed to shake my head at Jolee. "I still feel pretty exhausted, though..."

Jolee nodded, "Well... I injected a couple of kolto packs into you earlier trying to break that fever and chills you had."

That might explain the salty taste of kolto I had tasted on my lips earlier. I tried to get up but nearly fell over. Carth frowned. "Take it easy…here..." He handed me a bottle of what looked like some sort of drink that looked florescent orange and I took a sip. It tasted sweet and a bit like meilooruns and Jolee laughed at the expression I had drinking the liquid. "That should restore some of your energy."

I took a gulp of the drink and then inquired,"So...what did I miss while I was out?"

Carth frowned at me. "You should rest, Phoenix. You shouldn't be concerned about..."

I interjected, "On the contrary, Carth. I am..."I paused, regardless of how I felt about the Order and about Bastila. I knew in my heart I was a Jedi, even if I didn't follow every jot of the Jedi way. "I am a Jedi and this mission is ours. I need to know what's going on."

Jolee chuckled. "I think she's on the mend, Carth. She's talking about her mission."

I rolled my eyes. "You do realize it's rude to talk about someone as if they aren't in the room."

Jolee grinned at me and said. "The mission is already being handled, kid. Well aside from the fact that we have a bunch of Selkath inspecting our ship. We should be good to go soon enough."

I frowned. "Inspection? Inspection for what?"

Jolee laughed. "Don't worry, I took care of it." His hands sort of wiggled a bit and he grinned. "The Selkath only see what they needed to see. It wouldn't be the first time...I managed to get around a contraband inspection. But those were the good old days when I had a decent enough ship to smuggle with and a cause worth fighting for."

Carth gave a grimace and Jolee laughed some more. "Your soldier doesn't like the fact that I finagled us out of a fine or any serious questions about who and what we are."

"I sure wish I knew I had the Force sooner. It would have saved me the trouble of having to bribe people or drop certain shipments." I suddenly looked at Jolee a bit strangely and then gave a bit of a smirk."And...wait a minute…you… were a smuggler?"

Jolee grinned. "Don't look at me like that, dammit! I wasn't always the wrinkled coot I am now, you know. I can still fight, too, so wipe off that smirk I see there."

"What smirk? I wasn't smirking. Who said I was smirking. I am more interested in Jolee Bindo, the smuggler."

Jolee cursed a bit under his breath. "Damn it. I knew I shouldn't have said anything about that."

I laughed. "Too late now, Old Man. Tell me about it."

Carth suddenly laughed as well. "I told you...she won't stop till she knows your rank, file, and serial number."

I chuckled. "See Carth knows better than to hide secrets from me. So...what did you smuggle?"

Jolee sighed. "Fine. I'll tell you. I was an adventurer. Happy now? I wasn't even done with my Jedi training back then. I had a full head of hair and an eagerness to see absolutely everything. Sound familiar? The Council was never very happy with willful, brash Jolee Bindo, you see. Even less so when I began my smuggling career."

"A Jedi...a smuggler! That seems well...I always thought...well, a Jedi would never be a smuggler."

"You're very sure of that, are you? My, my, you must be very learned and experienced to know so many things. At any rate, I was still a Padawan at the time. At the time the Ukatis system was interdicted by its own King. He preferred to keep his people starving and poor, all the better to oppress them. The Senate was trying to negotiate a peace, but they were getting nowhere as usual. I decided I wasn't going to wait. I found myself a ship and a partner and we began smuggling food and supplies to the Ukatis citizenry through the blockade."

I looked at Jolee with a new-found respect. "I bet that was dangerous...I mean...I know the penalty for smuggling in some systems is pretty harsh."

"Oh, it was. I was a half-decent pilot in those days... and with the Force guiding me, we made it through some tough spots nobody else would have."

Carth shook his head. "No wonder, Phoenix likes you. You both have something in common."

I chuckled, and Jolee laughed and then added, "Did you think all Jedi were nothing but a bunch of boring old monks chanting mantras about the Force and..universal harmony."

"So...you were also a pilot?"

"Pilot, smuggler... several other things, too. Or did you suppose I was always a crotchety hermit?"

"Well...you did sit in the Shadowlands for twenty years doing nothing. I just have a hard time believing you did all that."

"Why not? There were millions of people crying out for aid. What else was I supposed to do?"

"Good point...I bet the Jedi wanted you to do nothing."

Jolee laughed. "Damn straight. And If nothing's not good enough for you there's no reason it should have been good enough for me back then, either."

"So...where did you get all the supplies and credits for such an operation?"

Jolee paused a moment and then said, "Well... we didn't *buy* all the equipment, per se. Some were happy to donate goods. Some we just, ah, knew had more than they could use..."

I shook my head. This explained a lot actually, and why Carth wasn't pleased with Jolee's use of the Force. "You were a thief! And you stole things?"

Jolee snorted. "'Stole' is such a harsh word. They would have donated those goods readily enough if they were compassionate. I considered it a tax on the greedy. We only got caught once. A lone Ukatish frigate shot us down and forced a crash landing. I thought the Force had abandoned me, as I remember."

I laughed. "Well...considering your life of crime. Maybe you should have been shot down."

"Oh, so you're going to speak for the Force now, are you? I deserved to crash, is that it?"

I sighed and tried to get out of bed; however, I was so very weak that I could barely manage to swing my legs over the side of the bed. Carth and Jolee shook their heads at me and pushed me back into bed.

Carth frowned. "Not yet! You need to rest."

"Frack...I've rested enough, you two and what happened, Jolee?"

Jolee sighed. "I'd rather not talk about it..."

I frowned. "Bad memory I take it..."

Jolee sighed. "No. No, that was a good memory. There are just... much worse ones that followed."

Carth frowned. "How can being shot down out of the sky be a good memory?"

Jolee sighed. "I met my wife...that's what you nosy Republic spy. It's just I rather not talk about it. Now if you don't mind me...I am going to check on our inspection crew and make sure they don't harangue us over other things on our ship."

Jolee left and I frowned at Carth. "What do you suppose that was all about?"

Carth sighed. "I don't know love…but at least you got more out of him than I did. I think he respects you or thinks a lot of you. At least enough to open up about his past. Anyway...he did mention to me earlier he was married but other than that he doesn't want to talk about it all that much."

I nodded. "So I noticed."

"Anyway...I think his marriage didn't end very well...he's kept harping on me about us being together. I don't know, love...I just don't know. Anyway...how are you feeling?"

"I am..."

I paused thinking over the vision I had. I had some idea about where the Star Map was but the feeling as though I was being drowned and trapped was unsettling. Then there was that unquenchable rage that poured through me like molten lava. A rage that felt familiar yet alien to me."I've been better, Carth. But I've had enough being in a bed. I want to get up and do something."

Carth laughed. "I can only imagine. Come on, beautiful. Let's get you back to the land of the living."

* * *

A/N: So home home on Manaan where the Sith and the Republic do play…. Heh. So here's to the rest of Manaan.

Also, do take time to read other's fics besides mine. Kosiah has a wonderful post-Star-Forge story and a decent during the Star Forge story as well. Memory and Oblivion are good stories, and I do admit that sometimes others stories may have helped influence my story as well.

Next is Ether's Identities of a Lost Soul. It's nearing its end but good stuff...and Ether's worked hard on making a very vivid story.

Ether: Malak insane…well...maybe he is and maybe he isn't. But at the end of the day...he's headed that way. And yes…well Toka is headed a certain way.

Kosiah: Toka...was fun to write and so was Veranda. Again...as for Malak...there is a reason for him to be hearing Revan's voice but...that's also fun.

Vienna: Squint at KOTOR II and you may find Toka in there somewhere.


	77. Chapter76:Manaan:The Best Laid Plans pt1

**Chapter 76: Manaan: The Best Laid Plans… (Part One)**

 **~Carth~**

Phoenix looked weary, tired and as much as she tried to put on a good carefree attitude she seemed distracted. I rubbed her hand. "What's the matter, love?"

She sighed. "Manaan. I forgot that this is a water planet and…" She paused. "I am hydrophobic. Probably not as bad as a cathar but...I have a fear of water, and I can't honestly say why I am scared of it. In many respects, I am kind of wishing we had gone to Korriban...but..."

I tried not to look incredulous, but it seemed like Phoenix was just a tad bit neurotic. I wasn't exactly sure what she wanted. "You said Korriban scared you because of the Dark Side and now you're telling me that you're scared of water more than the Dark Side. In what way…does that even make sense, Phoenix?"

She looked a bit glum. "I know! I know! It doesn't make sense. But I..." She paused. "I can't explain it…I just can't. Please don't press me on it, Carth. Please don't!"

"This wouldn't have to deal with the vision you had earlier, would it?"

Phoenix sighed and said nothing.

"I take that as a yes, then."

Phoenix merely nodded and as much as I wanted to press her on it. I knew better than to do so. If she wanted to talk about it, she would.

She looked at me as if she was expecting me to press her on the issue and then said,"I saw the Star Map...if you must know...but..."

"But?"

"I felt things in my vision that terrified me...Carth…I am frightened…" She paused a moment and then she said softly. "Hold me."

I held onto her and she softly cried. "I am so scared."

I held onto her as the tears came from her eyes.

"Shh...I love you..." I stroked her ebony colored hair. "Let me at those demons of yours, Phoenix. If they come any closer to you...I'll blast them."

She sniffed and then chuckled lightly. "I don't think...it works like tha..."

"Shh...I'll protect you, my little Blackbird. Whatever is after you...I promised to take care of you...even if it's illusionary shadows."

She sighed and finally settled down, but she didn't let me let go of her. I had had it. I couldn't protect Morgana but I could protect Phoenix and I said to her, "I've been thinking my little Raven. I honestly feel I could protect you a lot better if...we ran off and eloped at the Republic Embassy. Besides we're both adults. It's not like Canderous or Bastila can stop us."

Phoenix laughed. "I love it when you're sneaky, Republic. But…it's going to be hard to carry this out if we can carry it out at all. I mean Bastila is stuck to me like a piece of bubblegum found within a pack of limmie trading cards. But…I'll figure out a way to ditch her." She suddenly grinned. "I always do..."

I smiled. "What about Jolee and Canderous?"

She smiled. "I think Mission owes me a favor...and I am sure we can let her in on our little secret. I am sure she'd be willing to get at least one of them off of our backs. I can at least manage to do something to throw them off our trail."

I chuckled. "Your devious little mind is always working, Phoenix."

"Well, I am sure smuggling spice is a lot easier than trying to ditch an annoying Jedi padawan, a militant Mandalorian and a nosy old man."

"What about Juhani?"

Phoenix shrugged. "I am pretty sure...she'd look the other way anyway. She's not as high strung as Bastila. Anyway...you head on down with Jordo to the embassy, he's looking for a job and...well, I'll try and ditch Bastila and meet you there and soon..." She paused and then said with longing and desire in her voice. "I'll be Phoenix Onasi."

I still held onto her, and she grasped me harder and hugged me as if I was her lifeline. She suddenly kissed me deeply and took my breath away. I knew, though...that it wasn't a kiss a Jedi would give. It was filled with a deep passion that would betray their code, and Phoenix gave everything she had in that kiss. She finally released and said breathlessly. "I love you...so much...Republic. I'd give my life for you."

"And I you...gorgeous. Never forget that…my little Raven...I would die to protect you."

I stroked her hair and kissed her lightly on the forehead. "I'll see you at the embassy."

Phoenix nodded and I walked off.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

I grinned at Nix. "Sure, I can take care of Canderous for you. What do you want me to do, Nix?"

Nix looked at me, a twinkle in her black eyes. "Be your wonderful charming self, Mish."

"Okay...but how do you want me to do that?"

"I am sure you can figure out a way to get him out of the way for about an hour or two. Challenge him to a swoop bike contest, coax him to talk about the Mandalorian Wars over a glass of juma...either way...I don't really care...I just need him out of my hair while Carth and I..."

"Yea...I get it, Nix. I wish I could be there. You two are cuter than a pair of porgs. Oh, one more thing...maybe Big Z can be there to see you two get hitched. Maybe I can't be there but at least if Zaalbar is there I can ask him how it went afterward."

Nix laughed."I suppose he's entitled to see us get married, after all we were at his wedding. Yet, this isn't going to be some glamorous affair, Mish. It's probably just going to be the ambassador looking over paperwork and then having us say vows and that's it. But I am not really worried about a big party or anything like that, we can save that for later..." Nix paused and then sighed. "Well...assuming there is a later. We can have a real proper ceremony and you and Zaalbar can be invited. Maybe…" She sighed. "I'll rebuild my home back on Deralia and we can live there. It's going to be hard...I left my home a burning pile of ash...but I think with Carth we can rebuild my childhood home...it will be a good deal of hard work...but we could all live there and be a family."

I smiled. "That sounds nice, Nix. So what's your home like anyway?"

"A bit like Dantooine actually. Where I was born and raised it was predominantly farmland as far as the eyes can see. There were beautiful sunrises when the sun hit the fields."

Nix sighed and looked far away for a moment and she then said idly, "And my mother's apple and raisin pie. I can still remember the taste. We made it together...she said it was a secret family recipe. And..." Nix grinned. "I know the recipe…maybe I can teach you how to make it as well, Mish. But you must swear not to tell a soul how its made because it *is* my mother's secret recipe."

I chuckled. "Absolutely, Nix...I won't tell anyone how it's made. Anyway...it must be nice to have a home. Griff and me we were always on the move back on Ryloth and I barely remember it. I was just a youngster. Even on Taris we never really had a proper home. Griff and I...well, we don't even have a Kalikori."

I sighed a bit saddened I had no family heritage of my own. Nix seemed to recognize what a Kalikori was and she said softly. "I consider us family, Mish. If it means anything to you, we can start our own Kalikori together. You, me, Carth...his son. Maybe even…" She paused. "Canderous...he did adopt me as his daughter which kind of means you're well…his granddaughter."

I suddenly laughed picturing the old Mandalorian merc as my grandfather. "Hey...that gives me an idea on what to do with Canderous."

Nix smiled. "I knew I could count on you, Mission. Anyway, I never thought about going home before...well I think I am actually ready now to go home. I feel.. I've made peace with what the Mandalorians have done...and...I feel complete with Carth in my life."

I smiled. "You seem a lot calmer...Nix."

Nix shrugged. "Sometimes I feel like I am one with the Force. But...other times I feel like there's a raging inferno inside of me that's ready to burn not just me but all those that are around me. It scares me...sometimes."

"Well, you are named after a Firebird, Nix. Maybe... I dunno, maybe it's like your fate to be like that bird."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

"Maybe...but if that's the case..." I paused and shivered coldly. A fire burned and was painful. Was it really my destiny to be like my namesake? To burn in the flames of fire and to die only to be reborn into something else.

 _Do not be afraid of change, Phoenix._

Revan?

Revan responded _The Force will remake you, Phoenix. It will transform you. It is what the Jedi are not fully willing to embrace. Your fear is what holds you back. Yes, you will burn...you feel it...don't you? Your trial is at hand. Like what the old man said….the Force is swirling around you. The firestorm...your firestorm is coming..._

"Nix?"

"Nix?"

I frowned. "Sorry, Mish I guess I am still kind of exhausted. I am not a firebird...I am just a simple human woman."

Mission smiled. "It's okay, Nix. You've been through a lot. You and Carth...you deserve to be happy. I'll manage Canderous."

"I'll be sending T3 with you, Mish. I think between you two...you'll be able to handle Canderous."

Mission laughed. "Of course...Nix...I'll take care of him. But one question if T3 goes with me, what about HK? I mean HK and T3 sort of have some sort of rivalry going on."

"Well considering how things are on Manaan with the Selkath not wanting any weapons or fighting, switching HK off might be for the best."

"Won't HK put up a fuss over that?"

I laughed. "Probably, I just have to remind him...I am the boss."

* * *

 **~HK-47~**

Agitated Statement: But Master…shutting me down is an impractical idea. I insist that leaving me on this ship is not in your best interest.

The Master heaved a sigh. "I am sorry...HK but...Manaan is a neutral and pacifist planet. The Selkath will be all over you."

My processors whirled trying to discover a way to prevent my master from switching me off. I knew my master though, despite the fact that his planet was neutral in the war; I knew death and destruction followed my master no matter where she went. I just had to convince her that I was essential and that I should not be switched off.

Query: Have the Sith stopped hunting you and the Jedi princess?

"No."

Tactical Statement: Then what better way to attack you when you least expect it, Master. Think Master, think. The Sith will be waiting to strike you when you least expect it. Particularly here. Take me with you, Master. Don't let the Sith catch you unprepared.

I watched as the master seemed to be processing the information through her own processors. I only hoped the maker had made my master's processors a bit more complex than my own that she would be able to grasp the seriousness of her situation and not switch me off. Her mind at times was so very un-meatbag like but at the moment her meatbag brain seemed to be the only part functioning. I hoped the part of her mind that wasn't completely meatbag would kick in.

My master sighed. "HK…I am going to give you specific instructions. If you can manage to obey them then, I will reward you that lubrication I promised earlier."

My optical sensors glimmered brightly. My master had finally come to her senses.

"I require you to stay in standby mode..."

My behavior core suddenly whined in protest. Perhaps I had processed my master's actions way too quickly but then again standby mode was not a total shut down. My Master obviously had some use for me but not in the way I had hoped.

"If I need you, I will comm you."

indignant Statement: But Master, I must protest. If you are really in danger...I won't be able to reach you in time.

My master suddenly laughed. "HK...I am a Jedi, give me some credit."

Her laughter triggered something within me, there was something familiar about that laugh. I could not place it, though. I had quite a few masters though and my memory...well it was patchy. I was missing great portions of my memory. It frustrated me that I could not figure out where I had heard that laugh. Yet, I could not help but wonder why my master's laugh registered as familiar to me. I researched over various laughs from masters in my past, but my data bank was blank. I would kill the meatbag...most slowly and tortuously for robbing me of my memory.

Resignation: As you wish, Master. I cannot help but think you are making a mistake.

She smiled softly. "Thank you, HK. I knew I could count on you."

Statement: Master, I will kill any annoying meatbag for you, anytime you wish. All you have to do is give me the word.

My master shook her head. "Perhaps you will. I just hope it doesn't come to that."

She then smiled and then said. "Let's get you started on that lubrication, HK. I think you're entitled to at least that."

She motioned me forward through the ship and we walked to a maintenance bay. She dug through shelves and finding a few cans of lubricant oil, she plopped the oil into a bath meant for droids. She turned on the unit warming the oil. "Here you go HK. Enjoy the lubricant bath. It should keep you nice and limber if I need you."

Eager Statement: Thank you, Master. I do wish you'd allow me to go with you...but I shall avail myself of this small pleasure.

My master left me to my pleasure, perhaps obeying her wishes did have some benefit even though she was a pseudo-pacifistic Jedi, my master was not that bad...for a meatbag.

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

Something was going on in Revan's little deceptive mind, I could tell. She had a wild grin on her face and she approached me with the holocron that Master Jax had given her. I tried to look busy in the medlab. "I did my best, Old Man. I studied some of Master Jax's techniques. Now...you owe me."

I snorted. "Owe you...I owe you nothing, kid. What exactly do I owe you?"

Revan rolled her eyes. "You're getting thick, Old Man. You said you'd make more healing kits for me."

"I did?"

"Yea, you did."

"Well I don't have any more herbs...this isn't Kashyyyk, you know."

Revan sighed. "Then you lied to me."

"No, I didn't. I said I didn't have any more herbs and you needed to study that holocron.

Revan glared at me with a surly look on her face. "You *still* owe me, Old Man. We're on Manaan and there's kolto here. See if you can find some source of kolto for us to use here. Take Juhani with you and see what you can find here."

I raised an eyebrow. Plotting, Revan was plotting. She sought to keep me and Juhani occupied. I recognized a scheme when I saw one. It wasn't as if I was born yesterday.

"What if I say no, kid?"

"You *still* owe me, Jolee!"

"I told you before, kid. I owe you nothing. And what's with driving Juhani and me off the ship, Phoenix?"

She sighed."Fine…I see I can't fool you. Look...Carth and I need to be alone and..."

"And what?"

She looked petulant. "We want…and before you frown old man...or disapprove...Carth and I wish to be married."

I paused in thought and mulled Revan's words over. Son of a... so Revan intended to go through this after all. She was either so mixed up thinking she was Phoenix Star or something else... I looked at her and considered her presence and her overall surface thoughts. She clearly was so infatuated with that Republic captain that she was willing to throw whatever sense she had out the airlock.

I sighed and then stated, "I don't disapprove, kid...but I don't exactly approve either."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You've got a great deal going on, kid. You told me earlier you have some gaps in your memory. What if you find out something from those gaps that…"

Revan's face scrunched up. "But I love, Carth! And Carth doesn't care. I told him and…he said what matters is the love we have for each other."

"Look kid...I am happy for you. Good for you I say. But...are you sure now is the right time? And what about you and…" I paused."I see how Bastila looks at you and…I can tell there is some tension between you two."

Revan groaned. "I..." She lowered her head. "I screwed up, Old Man. I love Carth...more than...well Bastila and I...we had a few intimate moments and...well...I don't really feel the same about her. It's that damn fracking bond. I felt her…it kind of suckered me in and..." Revan paused. "She loves me...and...well...I got kind of pulled in the wrong way with her. And I don't even think her love is...well, it's like she loves me for my roguish smuggler's background and not as a person. Maybe I am wrong on that but I am bonded to her so I kind of get a feel of what she feels for me and... it seems kind of an obsessive type of love."

That actually explained a lot to me about Bastila's motives. She loved Revan not as the woman she was but for her past. Revan had been a hero to so many in the Republic and to many Jedi who had followed her to war. It was like the same damn hero-worship my wife had for Exar Kun and it wasn't healthy. Hero worship wasn't love, I knew that and apparently so did Revan or Phoenix on a smaller degree.

I sighed and laid a hand on her shoulder. "You need to tell him what happened, kid. Otherwise, you're lying to him, and that's not the basis for a proper relationship."

Revan looked at me sadly. "What if I lose him, Jolee?"

"If he loves you, kid. He'll forgive you. If not...then..."

A few tears came to her eyes. "I am scared."

I nodded. "Well...that's understandable. But don't marry him without getting that out of the way. If you're not ready to tell him then...you shouldn't get married."

Revan face scrunched up as she contemplated my words and then said, "I suppose you're right, Jolee. Anyway...about that kolto."

I smiled. "Yea...I suppose I can look around for something. I had a few contacts here on Manaan. I use to smuggle the stuff. I'll see what I can do. Maybe even find a kolto tank along with that kolto…and the way you hurt yourself, kid...we could probably use one."

Revan chuckled. "Yeah...I do seem to spend more time out of commission than I like. I guess I am pretty accident prone."

"At least you bounce back pretty quickly. But when you get to be my age...healing takes a good deal longer than it should. I'll take Juhani with me and see what we both can find."

Revan smiled and she kind of shocked me as she enfolded her arms around me and gave me a hug. I wasn't expecting that but she said softly, "Thanks, Old Man. You mean a lot to me."

"Ahh, I am kind of getting fond of you too, lass. Take care and...think about what I said."

She nodded and walked off.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

Mission was seriously starting to annoy me. I don't know what was going on, but she said that because Nix was going to adopt her as her daughter and I had adopted Nix as my daughter that that made her my granddaughter. I groaned I had no idea Mission was going to take this adoption thing seriously. She wanted to hang out with me and do "Gramps" stuff. I had no idea what she intended by that.

I glared at the twi'lek. Normally she gave me my space, but this was the first time she actually was coming to my little corner of the Hawk and it made me wonder why. She sighed and looked at me. "I am bored, Canderous. Nix and Bastila have gone off to see about info on the Star Map. Big Z said he was going to see the Republic Embassy about seeing if Kashyyyk could get some help after Czerka's stunt. He took Carth and Jordo with him. He said it was time for the Republic to realize that Wookiees are part of the galactic community. I never thought that Big Z would get this political but I guess it makes sense considering the fact that he's a chieftain's son and all. Jolee and Juhani went off to see about some kolto and..." She sighed. "I am all alone...AGAIN! Honestly, Nix promised me that I could do something this time and...she lied. I mean this is getting old, Canderous. I am not just some useless kid."

I looked at Mission and kind of felt sorry for her. A Mandalorian would have been off proving themselves and here Mission was stuck like some runty strill. I sighed. "Great...and apparently I am stuck here babysitting."

Those were the wrong words to say, and Mission let me have it. "I am NOT a kid, Canderous. I am tough, I am capable of doing lots of things and Nix won't even give me a chance to do them. Come on, Canderous...don't you act like some stuck up prick as well. I thought that at least you'd give me a chance."

I looked at Mission and saw a streak of toughness in her eyes, determination, and grit. Perhaps Mission had some promise. Maybe...just maybe she had the makings of a Mandalorian after all. Perhaps that was what Akume saw in her and why she decided to adopt her. "What fighting techniques do you know, Mission?"

Mission shrugged. "Fighting? I have a brace of blasters Griff gave me. I think I am a pretty good shot. Anyway, don't ask me where Griff got them. I honestly have no idea where he got them. I think he stole them from someone."

I snorted. I should have expected such from a Tarisian street kid. "What about hand to hand? Are you any good at any of that?"

"I am not that good. I've seen Nix do it. I mean...she's fast. I've never seen anyone fight as quickly as she does."

I chuckled. "She's a Jetti, of course, she's going to be fast. I think of her as a graceful dancer and she knows Echani fighting. You probably should ask her to teach you."

"I don't know, Canderous. She seems kind of preoccupied at this moment in time."

I nodded. "Do you want to learn?"

Mission shrugged indifferently. "I guess. But couldn't you teach me to do that later, Canderous? I've been stuck on this ship since Kashyyyk and I rather be doing something on Manaan than end up stuck on this ship learning fighting techniques. And umm...well... T3 too…"

I heard a beep and I saw T3 roll into the room. Great, so now not only was I stuck with a moody teenager I was stuck with a droid that had personality quirks. T3 really needed a memory wipe but I knew how Akume felt about that. I had a feeling that that was Akume's subconscious coming into play; somehow subconsciously, of course, she knew her memory had been fracked all to hell and so she was very demonstrative over keeping her droids and their memories intact.

I gave a long painful sigh and said with a grumble. "What do you want to do, Mission?"

T3 gave an annoyed beep as if to say, don't forget me!

Mission's eyes brightened up. "Can we head to the nearest cantina? I am sure Manaan has got one. I mean that's where all the action generally is. I want to talk to some Selkath, meet some of the people here. Play a few games of pazzak and..."

Of course, leave it to the streetwise kid to want to fleece people of their credits. Of course, going to the cantina might not be a bad idea afterall. I could learn a few things as well. Yet, this wasn't exactly what I had in mind. I grumbled a few obscenities in Mandalorian and then said, "Alright…let's go."

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I was concerned about Revan. She looked so wane and pale, mainly she looked tired. I worried that it might be a sign of Dark Side corruption, but she managed a good-natured grin at me as she tried to hide the obvious fatigue that plagued her features.

We had divided the crew into groups, Phoenix and I would see what we could find out about the Star Map.

Juhani and Jolee decided to seek out medical supplies and this was the best place to get them. Jolee said he probably could get a hold of mass quantities of kolto. The way he had stated it made me question the legalities of how he was going to procure kolto but he said he had a feeling we might need to install a kolto tank and have some kolto on the ship. So he was going to do his best to procure a tank and the necessary kolto to fill the tank up.

Carth, Zaalbar, and Jordo decided to go ahead to the Republic Embassy to find out news and various things, as well as employment for Jordo. As for Mission, Canderous, and T3, I heard those three were going to the local watering hole. I didn't exactly approve of Mission going into a cantina, but Mission reminded me she had spent most of her time growing up on Taris in a cantina.

As for Phoenix and me, we exited the ship and I said calmly, "Maybe you should stay back on the ship and rest, Phoenix."

She shook her head. "I've had enough rest, Bastila."

"But it's obvious that this mission is taking a lot out of you."

She rolled her eyes at me. "Maybe you ought to take a look in a mirror yourself. You don't exactly look too great either. You look awful. You look tired, thin, pale. You feel a bit off to me. Are you getting enough sleep? I hope I haven't been the cause of a decline in your own health, Bastila."

I sighed. "I am well enough, Phoenix. I am more worried about you…that vision you had. It troubles me."

Phoenix glared at me harshly. "Frack...not even what I feel or see in dreams is private like it should be. Look I don't know why I dreamed any of that…Bastila. Can't we just focus on the Star Map?"

"You know very well you dreamed of more than just the location of the Star Map."

Phoenix's voice took a dark tone. "Drop it Bastila. I don't want to talk about it." Her voice suddenly changed in its timber, "And it's convenient...that you're not talking about your health...you need to consider the fact that you don't look well. You're the one that needs to rest...I think...maybe meditate...or something."

A voice suddenly came alongside us. "I agree with your assessment, Padawan Star. Padawan Shan, you look a bit frazzled."

I turned around to find Master Jax, and I frowned. "Master Jax? I thought you were on Dantooine."

She bowed slightly. "Forgive me for startling you two, but I was sent on a mission from Master Vandar to procure kolto for the Dantooine Enclave. Unfortunately, I am on a waiting list because apparently, the Republic Military is first on the list for Kolto imports followed by the Sith Military. I keep trying to tell the Republic embassy that the Jedi are just as important and we deserve at least a portion of their kolto and then I would gladly give them part of our portion just as soon as the selkath give the Jedi our portion."

Phoenix eyes suddenly lit up and she suddenly grinned. "Maybe I can help with that, Master Jax."

Master Jax chuckled. "Perhaps...although I am not sure how you could help on that."

"Let me at least try, Master Jax."

Master Jax smiled. "Well, Padawan Star…perhaps you are far more adept in results than I would be. You're welcome to try, but I must warn you Ambassador Roland Wann is a tough man to deal with. He's not particularly fond of Jedi. You should know that he was once a decorated soldier captured by Dark Jedi and they tried to break him. They failed due to his mental conditioning, but he ended up a cripple due to their interrogation techniques. Eventually, a squad of his own men disobeyed orders and rescued him. He's considered a great man and a hero in the eyes of the Republic. However, due to his injury, the Republic felt sorry for him and gave him the position of ambassador here on Manaan. Yet...I think Roland Wann is a bitter man. He misses his command and takes it out upon Jedi. As far as he's concerned Jedi are Jedi be they light or dark."

Phoenix mulled this over. "Hmm...he sounds like a tough nut to crack. But…" She folded her arms up, but one arm now propped up under her chin. She looked a bit like a general thinking over strategy. I chilled as I could overlay Revan's dark robes onto Phoenix's lean form. I could picture the Dark Lord in a similar manner or pose planning strategy against the Jedi.

She then stated firmly, "Every man has his price. Surely there is something that Ambassador Wann needs, wants or desires. I'll figure it out, Master Jax and I will get the Kolto you need for the Jedi."

Master Jax merely smiled. "That's very generous of you Padawan Star. Why don't you go on ahead...I get the feeling that Padawan Shan and I have some things we should talk about."

Phoenix wandered off towards the embassy an obvious grin on her face. I got the sense suddenly that she wanted desperately to be at the embassy and I had no idea why. Something strange was going on, and I didn't like it. I looked firmly at Master Jax. She had a smile on her face. "She's doing very well...you've done well keeping Revan on the path of the light."

I shook my head. "Master Jax she's an impossible woman to deal with. She stubborn, headstrong, impatient. Her methods of getting things done...leave a lot to be desired. I don't know what to do with her."

Master Jax sighed. "It's so easy to look at Revan with a critical eye now and think every action she takes will lead to the Dark Side. Yet...if this was Revan...the old Revan that was the Dark Lord of the Sith. Do you honestly think she would care about retrieving kolto for the Jedi? Do you honestly think she would concern yourself about your welfare? She's not the same woman, she once was."

I glared at Master Jax. "Because we altered her memories and changed her perceptions of things...Master Jax. She thinks. No..." I paused."She honestly believes she's a woman named Phoenix Star. Are the actions Revan does now the actions of Phoenix Star or the actions of Revan? Where does one personality end, and the other begin? I can't honestly tell anymore, Master Jax. I honestly don't know who I am dealing with. I see Revan in Phoenix and Phoenix in Revan. You're not bonded to her like I am. You don't know what I am dealing with."

"Perhaps not. But..."

I remembered that Master Jax and I had parted not on the best terms. I sighed and interrupted her before she could utter any more words. "Master Jax, I must apologize for my behavior earlier. You were only trying to help the Order through your actions with Revan. Yes, I am upset for those actions because I really honestly wish there had been a better way to deal with Revan, other than stripping her mind of…"

I sighed and Master Jax nodded. "You have feelings for her, don't you, Bastila?"

"What? No! I mean...whatever I feel...whatever...I assure you….my relat…" I coughed."My association with Revan is purely academic. I admire her...yes. I mean...who wouldn't! She was a great hero...she saved the Republic…before...well before she became the Dark Lord. I want her to be redeemed...Master Jax. It means a lot to me. I..." I paused."There is something I need help with...Master Jax and I don't know how to accomplish it."

I watched as the healing master smiled softly a slight wisp of a laugh on her lips at my statement. "What's so funny?"

Master Jax shook her head, her grey hair trailing from underneath the hood of her robe. "Padawan Shan, do not lie to me. I know you have feelings for Revan. I've seen similar with...well with another...and Revan. But that's a story for another time and I digress…you said you needed my help and by the will of the Force I am here so what do you need help with, Bastila?"

I reached into my pack and handed Master Jax a datapad. "You see this...this alien, an assassin... mentioned that Revan's father is in danger. We must do something...he wanted me to kill this associate of his in order to protect Revan's father... but….that's not the Jedi way. There has to be something we can do."

Master Jax took the datapad from my hands and looked it over. "Do not trouble yourself with this...I will handle it. After all, I am a healing master and..."A wistful smile crossed her lips."Well…this doesn't have to end with this Hulas ending up dead. Incapacitated…maybe. But dead no."

"Incapacitated…what are you planning to do, Master?"

"Do not worry, Bastila. You should go back to the ship and rest. Revan is right about one thing...you look terrible. When was the last time you rested? I mean honestly rested. You look wane...and...pale. Sick, I think. I am pretty sure this mission has been hard on you than most. I do not envy you your mission."

I watched as Master Jax handed me a packet of something. "Steep these herbs in some hot water, they will temporarily block your bond with Revan and help you sleep."

"What! You had something that could block the bond...and you never told me this before!"

Master Jax looked at me and shook her head. "Temporarily, Bastila. Not permanent and these herbs are very, very potent. I do not give them out often. They will make you very, very sleepy...so you fall into a very deep slumber. They don't block your connection to the Force, but they make it hard to concentrate so it's hard to access the Force. Therefore, it will block your bond to Revan. Would you honestly want to be like that all the time?"

I sighed and looked gloomily at Master Jax. "No. But I am coming with you to deal with Hulas. I owe it to Revan."

Master Jax sighed. "Very well...but you must follow my lead, Padawan. It could easily end up with Hulas dead if you do not follow my lead and we must be careful, this planet is very strict about its laws. However...as soon as we're done with this task...you must take my herbs and get some rest."

"But the Star Map..."

"Let Revan and her other allies help her for a change. You need to rest and you need your mind far away from the concerns of this war for a change. Come...Padawan….."

I wrinkled my nose a bit, part of me didn't like following Master Jax's lead. I had a bad feeling about this that it would turn out badly…

* * *

A/N: End of part one of this chapter. I decided to split this chapter into two parts. Only because if I followed where I want this to go it would easily be really...really long and it satisfied me that the crew of the Hawk is all going off on their own tangents and that will be followed in the next part of this chapter.

Inspiration goes to Ether's fic about Phoenix remembering Apple Raisin pie as there is a wonderful segment in Ether's fic about their own Revan remembering implanted memories about Apple pie. I couldn't help but put that in my own chapter.

Next chapter: Probably some meet up with our Sith characters, a marriage that may or may not happen, some hijinks with Mission and Canderous, Juhani and Jolee finding out some things in their search for kolto. Bastila and Master Jax meeting with Hulas, and some attempted bargaining with a stodgy Republic Ambassador who hates Jedi and Sith equally. And not all of that necessarily in that order. Anyway...sorry this chapter took so long to do. I've been very, very busy. I am just glad that this chapter actually got somewhere and that I am still writing. Period.


	78. Chapter 77:Manaan:Best Laid Plans part2

**Chapter 77: Manaan: The Best Laid Plans part 2**

 **~Omni~**

So this was Manaan the water world; I sat by a window in the cantina watching as the waves of the ocean of this planet stretched on and on. I nursed a drink, I vowed revenge against Bandon for his actions. He had insulted me and insulted Lord Revan. Yet...Bandon had wedged himself in a convenient position. If I attacked him on Manaan, I would be accused of disturbing the peace and thrown into a selkath jail. Such actions were cowardly and contemptible that Bandon would hide among the neutral and pacifistic selkath. A man in a Republic uniform came up to me. "Are you looking for work? I can guarantee good pay if you're interested."

I raised an eyebrow, the man obviously could not tell whether or not I was aligned with the Sith or the Republic. I snorted. "You're talking to the wrong person I am with the Si..." I paused. No, technically I wasn't with the Sith. Since Malak had usurped Revan's position; Bandon had made it abundantly clear that I wasn't wanted and that he would kill me the next time he saw me. I wasn't with Malak's Sith Empire but I considered myself with Revan, who was my Lord and my Master. Although Revan was clearly not in her right mind.

I remembered Rama's words that Revan was not fully herself somehow. She refused to come with me. She didn't even act like she recognized me. I was filled with a sense of sorrow. I wanted my master, my true master. I sighed and opened my credit pouch. Technically a Shadow Hand of Lord Revan was given all the resources they needed but judging by my resources, I was on the verge of being short on funds. Revenge on Bandon would have to wait. I looked at the Republic representative and said coldly, "I am available for hire."

"Wonderful. Come by the Republic Embassy and we will get you set up on your assignment."

I nodded and glared angrily at the ocean that seemed much more placid than I was. Work for the Republic! I'd just as soon as drink rancor spit. Yet, my need was desperate, and I had few to no options. I took up my drink and swallowed it in one gulp. Rage was in my heart towards the Republic and their contemptible allies... the Jedi. But mostly my rage burned towards my old master, a hypocrite! Lord Revan had stripped away her pretense during my conversion and showed that of all things the hate that burned in her heart.

 _I bowed and then looked upon her, her white hair bound up in a bun and she wore white robes. She was Echani. Her presence was like ice to me, cold and unfeeling. "Knight Omni, your skill in Echani fighting with the blade and without is most impressive."_

 _She asked me to call her mistress and I deferred to her wishes._

" _Thank you for your praise, Mistress."_

" _I am sending you on a mission of the most importance to the Republic. Most of the council is unaware of it...yet."_

" _Mistress, how can the Council not know?"_

" _Because most of them refuse to act against a threat that grows greater and greater within the Force itself. Although there are a few on the Council that agree with me. You are one of the finest duelists the Order has ever produced, Omni. Your skill could match…"_

 _The mistress paused and I answered her._

" _Revan, Mistress?"_

" _Yes, Darth Revan. Blade for blade and strike for strike. I feel certain you could take on Revan and...subdue them."_

" _But to attack... and...you want me to...kill Revan?"_

" _Kill...subdue! Does it honestly matter, Knight Omni? Revan is a Sith. It is no crime to kill a Sith Lord that threatens the peace of the Republic."_

 _I paused and considered the mistress and her words. "But mistress the teachings of the Jedi do not advo..."_

" _Enough...you have your mission, Knight Omni. Subdue Revan and bring them back alive or kill them. Revan's day of execution has been delayed for far too long, Omni. See to it and do not fail me."_

 _I sighed. "Yes, Mistress…"_

Hypocrite! How could I serve the Jedi? There was more truth and honor serving Revan than in any of the accursed Jedi Masters! I longed for the white-haired Echani mistress' death. I was her padawan no longer. Yet, there was no honor even in being called her padawan as I had later found out that my mistress had denied I was even her student. Perhaps it was the shame that she held that her precious student had turned to the 'Dark Side.' My mission to kill Revan had failed, and I knew my mistress. She would deny she even knew me even in front of the very Order she held dear. The peace of the Jedi was a lie and the Force billowed forth within me giving me power but...I paused holding back the hatred I had. This job with the Republic only was a means to an end. I would bridle my hate and contempt and keep myself tempered till the day of my revenge against the archivist and the Republic she served.

I got up from my seat and frowned, I recognized two people and an astromech coming into the cantina. I ignored the astromech as irrelevant and focused on the blue-skinned twi'lek and the gristled-looking Mandalorian. I remembered them from that fateful duel on Tatooine, the one where Revan had killed Rama. Our eyes met and he pulled a blaster. "Mission, stay close to me!"

I bowed my head. "I am not here to harm you, Mandalorian!"

This was true, after all, there was an uneasy truce between the Sith and the Republic on this planet. Yet the Mandalorian still held his blaster at me not seeming to care about the consequences of his actions. Plus from what I understood these two served Revan. I had no idea what twisted relationship these two had with her but...I could not harm the allies of Lord Revan. These were indeed strange times where I could easily give the maxim that Lord Revan gave to me: The enemy of my enemy is my friend.

The twi'lek, Mission spoke. "Uhh, Canderous…Manaan here!"

The astromech gave an adamant beep probably stating the same thing as Mission.

I gave a wane smile. "Indeed. You try and shoot me you'll end up in a selkath jail."

The Mandalorian, Canderous as the twi'lek, Mission called him lowered his weapon and snorted. "Omni, is it? The Jedi Princess told me about you."

"Then you should know I could kill you and your little twi'lek friend in a blink of an eye. I was one of the Jedi's best duelists. They said my skills rivaled Exar Kun's but...as I said earlier I am not here to harm you, Mandalorian. I have no desire to spend time in a selkath jail, do you?"

The Mandalorian glared at me. "You are so lucky we're not on some other world, Echani dog! I don't care what power or skill you have."

I laughed suddenly amused at the fact a Force-blind Mandalorian would challenge me. "If you still seek my blood...Mandalorian. We are both warriors from warrior's races...perhaps next time we shall prove ourselves against each other."

Canderous nodded. "I would relish that, Echani."

"As would I!" I gave a solemn bow to the Mandalorian and left.

* * *

 **~Canderous~**

Running into the Echani, I really wanted to kill him but Mission was right. This was Manaan and I lowered my weapon. The Dark Jedi was an enigma. He did not seem like he wished to harm me or Mission, unlike some of the Sith scum that was on this planet. Most of the Sith wanted to fight but Omni seemed to withstrain himself, of course, that could be the fact we were on Manaan. If he wasn't against us I might have respect for him.

A Republic soldier, dark-haired and tan skinned, sitting at the bar shook his head. "You're lucky, mate. I mean just look at those Sith...their eyes. You can see they'd like nothing more than to kill each and every one of us, personal-like."

I nodded. "Doesn't bother me any. If we weren't on Manaan...I'd slaughter them."

The grunt nodded. "Same here...my name is Risan Soong. Sit down, any friend of the Republic is a friend of mine...I'll buy you both a drink."

I nodded and sat down along with Mission. "So what brings you here to this world? Mercenary work?"

Mission grinned and spoke, "Nah...we're on an important assignment with the Jedi."

I elbowed Mission in the gut, that girl could never keep quiet when she needed to. The elbow to her chest elicited a cry of pain from Mission and a protest from her. "Hey..."

T3 beeped harshly at me as well probably scolding me about elbowing Mission. The droid then moved off seeming to find something in the cantina that interested him.

Risan spoke, "I've been watching that Echani you had an altercation with. I don't know what to make of him. I mean he wears the clothing of a mercenary type... and if it wasn't for the lightsaber hanging from his belt, I'd miss him being a Dark Jedi, but...his clothing looks pretty beat up. I think he's a rogue one. I've heard of rogue Jedi but rogue Dark Jedi...that's a new one."

I nodded. "Ehh...Force users are Force users and are nothing but trouble."

Mission gave me a painful glance. "That's not fair, Canderous. You know, Nix isn't like most Jedi."

"Except for her." I paused. I had more of a concern over Akume's welfare than most, even though she was a Jedi. "But...trouble seems to follow her whether she likes it or not."

The drinks arrived, and Risan took a draught of his and he said. "So...special envoy with the Jedi, huh? Must be important that the Jedi would hire you to go with them."

I looked thoughtful, I had changed a lot during this mission, I only hung around Akume or Phoenix as she preferred being called because there was something about her I admired. I could have cut loose and went towards other mercenary jobs but I didn't. I sighed, it wasn't normal to have this sort of devotion towards a smuggler/Jedi like Phoenix but I did. I must be getting soft in my old age. Meanwhile, Mission interjected,"Who said anything about pay?"

I elbowed Mission again and she cried out, "Geeze, Canderous...cut it out!"

Risan chuckled a bit.

Mission said proudly, "My best friend is a Jedi. I owe her my life."

Risan frowned. "I see... sisterly and brotherly devotion. Hey, that's a good thing. I've never seen that since...well...it's been a while... since I've seen a group of sents...devote themselves to a cause without pay."

I grunted, I didn't want to admit to a stranger, as Mission could, her attachment to Akume. For me, my attachment was personal as well as complicated to explain. All I knew was I cared about her and felt a deep Kot-tal-vod connection with the smuggler/Jedi. It was like...she understood the cry of war, and I could share things about my past that I could never share with anyone else. I could see us together slaughtering our enemies and bathing in their blood. This was the reason I had made her my daughter.

Risan looked at me. "If you're looking for paying work, I am sure the Republic would hire you as a mercenary at their embassy."

Mission's eyes went wide. "Canderous...umm...hey look..."Mission's hand pointed over to an area written in Aurebesh that stated: Swoop Races.

"Look swoop races, just like what they had back on Taris. I bet they have competitions...as well and I am sure...well...I could win those races... and...it would be easy credits."

I frowned. "But working for the Republic...we will get credits. Winning a race...well that's quite a feat, the only one I could trust to win would be Phoenix."

"Yea...I bet she could win the races here but...she's busy."

Risan coughed. "Yea, about those swoop races. One of the racers, a gamorrean, Hukta Jax cheats."

Mission glared angrily. "If he cheats… how come no one has done anything about him?"

Mission had a point but gamorreans were trouble and I wasn't sure I wanted to deal with a stinky filthy swine.

The soldier sighed. "Complicated, no one has actually seen him cheat but pretty sure he does. Somehow all the competition ends up having accidents and...they end up either dead or injured. He's dangerous, kid. I'd honestly leave the swoop races alone."

I expected Mission to take the guy's head off when he called her a kid. However, she didn't take the guy's head off. Instead she turned her attention on me and she glared at me. "We can't have some filthy stinking gamorrean hurt people, Canderous. We've got to do something about this."

I shook my head. "I can think of a lot better things we could be doing rather than stop a gamorrean."

Mission looked at me with pleading eyes. "But people are going to get hurt, Canderous. How can you say you're not going to do anything?"

"Look, Mission we all know swoop racing is dangerous. They knew the risks..."

"True but...what would Nix do if she was here?"

Mission's words cut me deeply. I knew what Phoenix would do, unfortunately. I sighed. "Phoenix would...want us to stop this gamorrean. Damn the selflessness of Jedi."

Risan chuckled lightly. "Well...if you manage to survive Hukta Jax's cheating then the Republic's offer is still open. We need as many mercenaries as we can get. Anyway...I need to get back to my bunk before my shift starts in a few hours. Hope to see you soon at the embassy."

Risan got up and left me and Mission.

I looked around. "Where is that damn droid?" I had seen that droid wander off and now wondered where he had sauntered off to.

I heard a beep and T3 came over beeping. "What the hell is he saying, Mission?"

Mission sighed. "T3 says he went over to an information terminal to find out the local news and events. He apologizes about running off."

"And?"

T3 beeped, and I looked at Mission for a translation. "Well...he says some selkath youth have gone missing. Their parents have posted a reward for any information and for their safe return. However, the Sith are accusing the Republic of it, and the Republic are blaming the Sith."

"You know...I am thinking we should have stayed on the Hawk. It would be much easier than getting involved in this altruistic Jedi stuff that Phoenix has a habit of getting herself attached to."

"So...you're going to help find these selkath as well?"

I shook my head. "No...I am going to find Phoenix because this shit is getting way over my head, Mission. I mean I can handle a cheating gamorrean but...missing selkath! I was an enforcer for Davik not some locator of selkath spawn. I doubt the Republic are behind them being missing but you can probably bet this has the Sith written all over it."

"But...Canderous...Nix is busy."

"You keep saying that, what the hell is she busy doing? It doesn't take all day to get information about some damn alien relic."

Mission was quiet, and her eyes turned away from me. My eyes narrowed and I said gruffly, "Mission…"

T3 beeped warily. I frowned. "Okay you two...what's going on with Phoenix...and you better tell me…or else."

"I promised Nix...I wouldn't tell you."

"Tell me what!"

Mission was quiet and I glared at her. "Damn it Mission...spill it!"

She gulped. "Don't be angry with me...Canderous. But...Nix and Carth...they...umm..."

"They...what?" I folded up my arms waiting.

"They went to get married."

"WHAT! I told them that if they did that I'd ki…"

I ran out of the cantina. There was only one place that I knew Akume and Carth could do that and that would be the embassy. I had to stop her before she made a horrible mistake, she knew her memory was bad...how could she do something like this?

* * *

 **~Mission~**

"This is all your fault…T3!"

T3 beeped angrily. ::I am not the one who kept saying Phoenix was busy.::

"Yea...but I am not the one who ended up telling Canderous that the selkath had some of their family members missing; and that the Sith were probably the ones who took them."

T3 beeped back in response. ::I ran an incorrect assessment of the Mandalorian's reaction. I had assumed he would do something on his own with you and not go running off to Phoenix for support.

"Yea, smooth move T3. I guess you didn't account for the fact that Canderous' may have changed how he does things since Taris. I mean I guess that's kind of a good thing but…it kind of stinks for Nix."

T3 beeped::What should we do now, Mission?::

"Heck should I know what we should do?"

::Shouldn't we warn, Phoenix?::

"Yea, I guess we should but...I kinda think Nix has a lot going on and...she's gonna to find out anyway."

T3 beeped harshly at me. ::But she's going to be mad you didn't comm her and say anything.::

"She's likely to be mad anyway. I don't know T3 and I am not even sure if Nix took a comm link or would even answer it. She was trying to keep this whole thing private and...I guess I really blew it..."

::I don't want to be in trouble, Mission. If Phoenix gets too angry, she could memory wipe me. I don't want a memory wipe.::

"She's not going to give you a memory wipe, T3."

::You don't know that. And you should try and contact her.::

I sighed. "I guess you're right, T3."

I picked up the comm I carried with me and tried contacting Nix but I got no response. Maybe Nix thought it was Bastila contacting her after all those two were close. I didn't dare call Bastila and Big Z...well he didn't normally carry a comm on him.

T3 suddenly beeped. ::Wait...maybe we can still keep Canderous from ruining this.::

"What...how?"

T3 didn't say anything. His shock arm came out, and he wheeled off. I cringed, that wasn't exactly what I had in mind but if T3 could keep Canderous from getting to Nix then more power to the little guy.

* * *

 **~T3~**

My duty was to Phoenix...Revan and as a droid whose master had been the Dark Lord of the Sith I was obliged to serve her and fulfill her commands. Mission had failed in keeping Canderous away from her and Carth but Revan was my master. She had asked Mission to help her, and Mission had failed. So I rolled off tracking Canderous. He had stopped a few feet away a comm in his hands. He was comming someone and I wondered who he was contacting. Jolee? No probably not. From what I had observed from the old sentient, he would probably tell Canderous to mind his own business when it came to Phoenix and Carth. Juhani? My observations with her, my calculations calculated that the cathar would generally defer to Phoenix and would only become agitated if she felt provoked about something. She would not react to Phoenix's plans. That left only one person who would probably react to Canderous…Bastila.

I slowly edged up closer to Canderous. He seemed oblivious to my approach and...I powered up my shock arm and...

Canderous gave a cry and looked at me surprise in his eyes, he apparently did not expect such a reaction from me.

He lifted his blaster and pointed it at me, and I upped the charge in my shock arm. The Mandalorian groaned, and he fell to the ground unconscious.

I heard the voice on the other end of the Comm, the extremely familiar voice of a Jedi Padawan. "Canderous...are you there? Canderous?"

I warbled nervously. I wondered what info had passed from Canderous to Bastila. I might have been able to keep Canderous from reaching Phoenix, but I knew that there was no way I could keep Bastila from Phoenix and Carth...except. I cringed as I processed the thought of HK. Yeah...that bloodthirsty machine might be able to delay Bastila from getting there but how? I doubted HK would come with me, and how could I prevent him from actually killing Bastila if I did convince HK to come with me. I saw a crowd slowly start to form around me and the unconscious Mandalorian. I decided I better get out of here before Manaan security decided to impound me. I took off quite hastily from the area.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

Master Jax and I walked the streets of Manaan, this seemed like a very strange city, to say the least. The streets and the adjoining buildings all seemed very structured and ordered. It was as if someone had dropped a building on a rocky outcropping. It reminded me vaguely of a crude cookie cutout. I wondered about the history of how Ahto came into being. It was said that the selkath had underwater cities that went beyond the depths that humans could go. Plus I heard rumors that those cities contained untold wealth and were far more elaborate than Ahto. Ahto seemed very, very sterile to me and smelled like the ocean and salt. Even the selkath seemed cold and sterile to me. They seemed to barely tolerate all us non-gill breathing species.

Master Jax seemed to notice my reflection stated, "The politics of this planet are...interesting to say the least. The selkath only tolerate both sides because they need the funds from selling kolto. However, a few of the selkath seem to acknowledge that if Malak ever does gain a stronger foothold in the galaxy the selkath's autonomy will be doomed."

"Then why do they tolerate the Sith presence and insist on selling kolto to them?"

"I said a few... selkath, Padawan Shan. Despite all this talk of neutrality, there are some who seem to favor the Sith and some who favor the Republic. Even sadder still, there are other selkath who seem to seek appeasement rather than offend either the Sith or the Republic."

"Then those selkath are fools thinking that appeasement will save them from the cruelties of the Sith."

"I agree, Bastila...but don't let the selkath hear you say that. They are a very prideful species and feel they are doing the right thing to protect their own interests."

I snorted. "What good are the selkath's interests if they end up enslaved by Malak?"

Master Jax sighed. "We can do nothing, Bastila. Perhaps in time the selkath will see the corruption of the Sith and act accordingly."

"But by then it could be too late."

Master Jax shook her head in slight disapproval. "You've been hanging around Revan too much, Padawan."

"But it's true...Master Jax. How can we stand here and do nothing?"

"Patience, Bastila. Patience...in the end, the Sith will end up taking a misstep and their true colors will be shown to the selkath. Anyway, do you know where this Hulas will be, Bastila?"

I shook my head. "No, the alien assassin I talked with did not give me any idea where I could find this Hulas."

Master Jax sighed. "I suppose we're going to have to wander this whole city till we find...him?"

I nodded. "I was told that Hulas is a he...but I have no idea what he even looks like or who he even is, just that he was hired by the Supreme Chancellor to kidnap Revan's father. I suppose we're just going to have to ask around."

Master Jax gave a weary look. "Yes...let's get moving."

We walked around the city asking selkath and various sellers, traders, and even others if they knew anyone named Hulas. I certainly hoped that Revan would appreciate what we were doing to keep her father safe. I knew I owed it to her, after...well after she had done all she could to save my father, even though my father had died. I sighed, I missed my father terribly. My heart ached so much that he was gone.

Master Jax seemed to notice or sensed the melancholy that seemed to flow through my spirit. "Are you okay, Bastila?"

I sighed. "Master Jax, I saw my father...he died in my arms. Revan...I should say Phoenix did all she could to save him but..."

"You feel you owe it to her to try and protect her father..."

I nodded.

Master Jax looked contemplative for a moment and subsequently heaved a hesitant sigh. "Bastila...I...honestly don't know what to make of you and your connection to Revan. Part of me finds this unsettling. And..."

I looked uneasy and then said softly. "Master Jax, I…love her. Please don't say anything to the council. I'd do anything to.. help her...and keep her father safe. But please don't say anything to the council about me and…Revan."

The Jedi healing master was quiet and said nothing for a moment and then she spoke, "It isn't my place to say anything at all, Padawan. I for one should know our Order has forced non-attachment on mere children. It's unnatural...not natural at all. The Order wasn't always like this…there was a time...when Andur Sunrider married Nomi Da-Boda and the Jedi allowed their knights to marry and maintain relationships. Yet after, Exar Kun, the whole Order became so much more rigid. But I am troubled…for you…this attachment you have for Revan, does she share it?"

"I..." I paused. "We…broke down and..."I coughed and my cheeks turned deep red and Master Jax sighed."I see...well that can be problematic because I know Revan mentioned she and that Republic soldier were involved together and...now you and her."

I bowed my head. "I am utterly ashamed, Master Jax. I know I am responsible for what happened between Revan and me. And now I am pretty sure Revan despises me. She blames me for what occurred between us."

Master Jax laid a hand on my shoulder and said calmly, "Well you did take advantage of her, Bastila. She has amnesia...Bastila! You are aware of this and yet you...you seduced her! A woman, who is vulnerable and susceptible to the Dark Side and you may have set her back."

I cringed. "I know...I know. I didn't think I'd...but we saw each other and…" I sighed."We didn't think...and the next thing I knew we were in each other's arms and...I know what I felt, and she felt it too. It...it was..." I turned red yet again. "Our bond...and...well, somethings are simply beyond words, Master Jax. And then she turned away from me and...she wants to marry Carth...after all that."

"You must let her go, Bastila. It's unhealthy to be this way with her."

"I am unsure if I can."

"You have to try, Bastila. I know a Jedi must do...not try but when it comes to this...you must or it will tear you up inside if it hasn't already."

"I will try...but it hurts...Master Jax."

"Love hurts, child. If it didn't then, it wouldn't be worth the risk in the first place. I know...this more than anything."

"You sound like Jolee...Master Jax."

Master Jax's eyes went wide. "Jolee. Jolee Bindo. I...I thought…he ran away...and...I thought after a while... he was dead. You've seen him?!"

"Yes, Master Jax."

Master Jax sighed. "He would have been a master if..." She shook her head. "So stubborn." She looked at me sadly. "I tried to convince him to stay...after the war with Exar but he refused to listen. We were both...on the cusp of being knights at that time. He wanted the Jedi to condemn him for his actions but I couldn't …we had both lost so much. He had lost his wife, and I lost my husband. While I embraced the Order and the strength of the Force for comfort. Jolee refused to be comforted. I..." She paused and said softly,"He needed time to mourn...and I...well I needed a fri.."

Jax looked a bit uncomfortable and she then said,"Time heals such things. Perhaps...it is possible he will come back to the Order."

I shook my head. "I don't think he will, Master Jax. He still has a great deal of animosity towards the Order."

Master Jax sighed. "That is indeed a pity. The Order certainly could use his wisdom and his knowledge. Anyway...let's see if we can find Hulas and then...if possible...I'd like to see Jolee. It's been...it's been quite some time since we've seen each other."

"Yes, Master Jax."

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

Juhani traveled with me as we proceeded our search for illicit kolto supplies. Juhani sighed. "Jolee...are you sure this is worth the trouble?"

"Well considering how often a certain Jedi-Smuggler gets injured I think getting a kolto tank is worth our time."

Juhani nodded. "Yes...she does seem to get injured a lot. I feel rather sorry for her. She does seem to have a..well if I wasn't a Jedi. I would say a run of bad luck."

I chuckled. "You know the masters would say there is no such thing as luck...there is only the Force. So if Phoenix gets injured a lot...then it's probably the Force's will she gets injured."

Juhani sighed. "That seems so harsh. Is the Force punishing her for her...past?"

I raised an eyebrow, apparently, Juhani had been told that Phoenix was...well…not Phoenix. "Ehh...maybe. But then again maybe she is punishing herself…I think...well subconsciously…she knows she is someone else. Someone dark…someone evil. I think she subconsciously pushes herself hard to the point of injuring herself."

"You mean…she self-flagellates herself for her past sins."

I sighed, I bit my lip. In so many ways, Revan and I were similar in spirit. I didn't want to admit it but the cathar was right...we both beat ourselves up for our actions at least Revan couldn't remember her actions but...subconsciously she knew...how...that could be... I wasn't quite sure how she could beat herself up for a past she had no memory of but Revan knew somehow...crazy as it seemed…Phoenix was driven by pain and guilt. The same pain and guilt I had over Nayama.

"Sadly...I think so."

"When will she stop, Jolee?"

I shrugged. "No idea. Maybe never. Maybe she'll spend her whole life trying to make amends or...she'll commit even greater sins...and cover herself in so much blood that in the end there will be so much blood she won't remember how much she's shed."

Juhani sighed. "I wish she would stop...Jolee. I know how it is to beat yourself up over things. It's what caused me to fall to the Dark Side."

"But it's not exactly easy to tell her to stop, kid. Because if we told her what we genuinely thought, she'd probably think we're crazy."

Juhani nodded. "So what do we do?"

"We try to lessen her burden and try to find ways for her to heal physically. Maybe in the process of this journey, she'll learn how to heal herself mentally."

"What about you, Jolee? I perceive you have some issues as well."

I glanced at Juhani and shook my head. It was bad enough having Revan poke and prod at me but to have Juhani do it annoyed me even more.

"Not your concern, kid. I know you want to help Phoenix but...my history...is off limits...is that clear, kid?"

Juhani sighed. "As you wish, Jolee. But you are in just as much pain as she is. I can sense it."

I grumbled more to myself than to her. "Damn Jedi…always poking their noses where they shouldn't."

Juhani said calmly. "Jolee, please…I only wish to express concern as a friend."

"Friend..." I snorted. "We've barely known each other for a few days, that does not make you any sort of friend…an associate, yes...but not really a friend...yet."

"Jolee, you are a stubborn old man. And yet you seem to connect much better to Phoenix than anyone else, why is that?"

I sighed. "Because we met before and…well...I know her a bit more than I do the rest of this hodge-podge crew of misfits."

Juhani said incredulously, "Misfits? Is that what we are to you?"

"Well from what I've seen of this crew; Bastila is ill-fit to be a leader. Carth has some sort of beef with his old mentor, Canderous is a washed out Mandalorian warrior who still longs for the good old days of war, Mission was abandoned by her family, Zaalbar was cast off by his father for a time, HK is full of memory issues, T3 probably needs a memory wipe, and you...my dear have issues trying to figure out how you stand in the Force. It causes you to hesitate and be very insecure."

Juhani bowed her head. "You seem to be acutely observant, Jolee. So by identifing us all as misfits, do you also label yourself a misfit?"

I laughed. "What do you think, Juhani?"

Juhani sighed. "I think...well I think you are too proud to admit your own failings. And despite the fact that you claim you are not a Jedi, you have a very Jedi mindset in the fact that you have put yourself in the position of an observer and...most of the Masters are very content in observing and not participating."

The cathar had hit pretty close to the mark and I scowled at her. I did not like being analyzed by...well actually I didn't like being analyzed by anyone. Juhani gave a light smile at my scowl. "Perhaps we are a lot closer in nature than most. Even though we are part of this crew we both do not seek out others that easily. Tell me why did you ask me to come with you, if you do not consider me a friend?"

"Maybe because Phoenix suggested it."

"Ahh...so she encouraged you to seek me out."

"Well, that and she wanted both us out of the way so she could marry and have a proper life with her damn soldier boy, Carth."

Juhani chuckled. "If you sought to shock me, Jolee then you failed. I already knew how close those two are and knew that one day they would probably run off to marry. I am happy for them, but it only reminds me of how lonely I am."

I frowned. "Lonely?"

Juhani sighed. "I left someone I was close to at the Enclave...Jolee. She was most upset I left her. We knew our happiness could not last as the life of the Jedi does not make love or relationships easy. And in many respects, I envy Phoenix, her willingness to defy the Jedi and their conventions. But enough talk...where is this contact of yours?"

I looked at the cathar. She indeed was a strange woman. I kind of...well... I kind of liked her. "Well, her name is Elora...and her husband and I did a lot of smuggling and some fighting during the last war... before...well, they settled down and became Republic diplomats here on Manaan; and well they still kept their ties into that shady world of smuggling and information gathering at least that's what I assume they were still doing when I left the Order and...I think they can help..."

Juhani raised an eyebrow and I chuckled and stated, "So maybe they became a bit more legit in their work or..."

Juhani shook her head. "Spies...your friends are spies."

"Now that's a fine way of thinking of my friends. They are not...they are respectable, I said they were diplomats. Well, I am not exactly sure what they are doing now; but if there is one person, I know who could get us a kolto tank and kolto to fill it, it would be Elora and Sunry."

Juhani shook her head. "There are many people who hide their true natures...Jolee and..."

I snorted. "Alright. So...my past and my friends' pasts aren't as clean as you would like but they can help us."

Juhani said nothing more as we walked into the Republic district that Manaan had set up. It was technically part of the Embassy and part of Republic property. The Sith presumably had a similar arrangement here on Manaan but in this part of Manaan: the diplomats, officers, and even visiting dignitaries had a place to stay. I looked up on a map on the wall and read the listings of residents and a listing for Sunry and Elora Organa.

"You know I kind of miss Elora and Sunry. They probably think I am dead...knowing my luck. They know I left the Order and all...but after I crashed on Kashyyyk well...I didn't exactly have a way to contact people. They will be surprised to see me...I bet."

We walked down the elaborately gilded hallways that had Republic emblems emblazoned on the walls, plants and Coruscanti artwork. All of this to remind people that this was an extension of the Republic here on Manaan. Juhani and I found the residence on a display for Elora and Sunry Organa. I buzzed the door. The door opened and I saw Elora her hair done up in traditional Alderaanian style. She looked up at me and gasped. "Jolee…thank the Force you're here. I've been praying to the Alderaanian mother goddess that a miracle would happen and sure enough you've come...an answer to my prayers. I...I need your help."

"Calm down Elora...what's going on?"

"It's horrible, Jolee...Sunry has been arrested."

I frowned. "What! He's a diplomat...undoubtedly he has immunity."

Elora shook her head. "He was caught off Embassy property...Jolee and…the Sith have accused him of murder!"

"Murder! How!"

"It's all a mistake, Jolee. Sunry isn't a murderer. Someone is trying to frame him!"

Juhani looked at me her face becoming harsh as her alien features. She said nothing but I could tell she had a look on her face that said it all. 'Your friends...are spies…what do you expect from spies?'

I snapped at Juhani. "I know Sunry. He would never murder someone."

Juhani sighed. "I am not saying he's guilty...Jolee but...his activities in the pas..."

Elora snapped. "Sunry is a war hero...he served in the war against Exar Kun. He was honored for his efforts, and he was injured... not unlike Ambassador Wann. We were made diplomats due to our faithful service to the Republic."

Juhani's ears flattened. "I apologize. I meant no disrespect but Sunry might not be as innocent as he seems. I don't know him or his motivations."

I sighed, so much asking for a kolto tank and kolto, asking for it now would be at the height of bad manners.

Elora shook her head. "But Sunry...is innocent. How can you even hint he could be guilty of such a crime?"

I said firmly. "We will find out what's going on Elora. I promise you...even if I have to call upon my friends for help. we will help your husband."

Elora sighed. "Thank you, thank you. Sunry is in a selkath jail. Go to the judges...offer your support to Sunry. I ask you...find the true murder."

* * *

 **~Master Jula Jax~**

Trying to find Hulas was not as easy as it seemed, we had dealt with every sort of mercenary I could find on this city. We finally ran into an iridonian who was in the city market a place where jobs could be considered and merchants sold and bartered items. Republic and Sith were all around us hiring mercenaries. The iridonian seemed to think we were hiring for the Republic.

The fully armored iridonian said in an annoyed tone. "I am not for hire..."

"I understand...but we are looking for someone."

"You and everyone else on this dreary wet world."

Bastila spoke suddenly, "If you hate this world then why are you here?"

"Did I say I hated this world? No, young Jedi whelp. Anyway, leave me alone…I have no stomach dealing with pathetic weaklings like you."

I glared at Bastila, she had inserted herself into this conversation without letting me try first. It was obvious that her time with Revan had not improved her at all. "I believe you can help us and I will not leave."

The iridonian chuckled. "You have spunk and a warrior's heart. Perhaps you are worthy after all."

I nodded. "We are looking for a sentient named Hulas."

"The...rodian?" The iridonian looked around making sure it was just us and no one else. "What interest would a Jedi and her whelp have with a black-market weapons dealer here on Manaan?"

"There is a war going on, iridonian. The Sith and our order are at war. Perhaps...we seek a private way to take that war to the Sith."

The iridonian laughed. "Perhaps but you Jedi do not...reveal such a violent side."

Bastila suddenly inserted herself once again into the conversation."I was on the strike team that took down Darth Revan. Do you think we lack the resolve to do what we wish against our enemies?"

The iridonian nodded. "Hmm...it is possible I was mistaken. Did you taste Revan's blood on your lips when he died?"

Bastila cringed and the iridonian chortled. "No...perhaps not... but for an iridonian, there is no greater honor than tasting the blood of one's enemy upon your lips. Anyway, you can find Hulas here...he sells his 'modified' weapons to anyone who is willing purchase them and is willing to bribe the authorities here to look the other way. He is over there by his tent."

I shook my head at Bastila and said to the iridonian. "Thank you..."

We wandered off, and I said firmly to Bastila. "You trouble me, padawan. You seem particularly unbent. Bragging about the fact that you took down Revan."

Bastila said firmly, "But Master Jax, that iridonian would not yield any info unless we could prove we had the mettle to match him."

I sighed. "Perhaps. Perhaps not but that's beside the point. You're willing to admit to a much darker purpose in taking down Revan. It...unsettles me."

"Master...this is war. You said it yourself earlier about lives that must be ended to save the lives of others."

I shook my head. "What if I admitted that I was wrong, padawan that I made a grievous error. By doing this to Revan...we have taken the Jedi down a much darker path. A path that will eventually lead to our own oblivion. Perhaps Revan will be redeemed in the end. But in the process of her redemption, we have compromised our morals, our ethics for a quick, easy path and solution. Even now I can see that your morals and ethics have also been compromised. How many more steps will we take into the dark before we no longer see the light?"

Bastila shook her head. "I am firmly committed to the path the council took, _**Master**_ Jax. If you cannot be committed to it, then I question what type of Master you are."

I sighed. "To be a Jedi one must reflect on all their actions be they good or bad and admit to mistakes. We are fallible sentients, Bastila…"

Perhaps as Jedi, we all needed to admit that it was a fault of training that caused Revan to fall in the first place. Bastila had changed. She had gone from being uncertain of the actions we had taken with Revan to ascertaining she was committed to the path the council had deemed. I gulped internally, what had we done? Were we on the path of losing Bastila? How far were we tumbling into the Dark? This was all my fault. I was about to speak some more to Bastila when her comm went off.

" _Bastila...she's done it this time…"_

" _Who?"_

" _Who do you think?"_

" _Re...umm...Phoenix..."_

A tone of annoyance could be heard from Bastila's voice as she stated, " _what has she done now?"_

" _She's run off to the embassy to get married to Carth after I expressly forbade it."_

" _What? She can't, Canderous. She just can't not...since...her...umm...we've got to…"_

The comm went eerily silent.

" _Canderous...are you there? Canderous?"_

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I heard the warbling of a very familiar astromech in the background.

T3. Damn that Astromech. I looked at Master Jax. "We've got to stop her, Master Jax. She can't do this!"

Master Jax sighed. "We've already ruined Revan's life enough, Padawan. Let her be. If she has a chance at happiness, we should let her take it."

I looked incredulous. "But...her memory…she can't...it's wrong! What if Carth finds out later that she's not...well not Phoenix but...the Dark Lord of the Sith…"

"And you admitted to me your intentions are not pure, padawan. Do you want to stop this marriage because you love her and want to be her lover...or is it due to her memory? Be honest...Bastila!"

I shook my head. "My feelings are not important..."

"Oh, but they are. I told you before...LET HER GO."

"I...but Carth is about to make a ghastly mistake."

"And you are only compounding the issue...with your own feelings. Now answer the question...do you want to stop this marriage because of Revan's lost memory...or because you love her and want to be her lover?"

I bowed my head. "I..." I paused. "I love her...and...her actions have consequences on us all."

Master Jax shook her head. "Ahh, the truth comes out at last. You don't fool me, Bastila. I am telling you again...let her go. We've already messed up her life as Revan. Let her have a chance at a new life as Phoenix."

"But...she's not...we can't let...she's not...the consequences of this marriage...Master Jax...the Order will end up embarrassed and shamed...perhaps even worse...about who married Carth…and he'll be angry. I cannot let this happen, and you know it."

I took off and started running toward the embassy. I was outraged at Master Jax, angry that she now regretted the decision the council had made towards Revan. I had entertained doubts but no...I swallowed them down and obeyed the council. And now Jax admitted an error. She made everything I had done regarding my orders with Revan feel worthless. She then seemed to think I was running after Revan because of some sort of latent passion I had for her. That was untrue...I was worried about what would happen if Revan married Carth ...the whole thing was a house of pazzak cards...it would crumble and fall.

* * *

A/N: And I decided to split this chapter and there will be a part three. I was talking to one of my quiet reviewers on Discord and said I think I had bitten off more than I could chew with this chapter. He was like in what way? Well….I intended to have a scene with Phoenix and Rolland Wann, a marriage scene and of course an interruption. A scene with Mission and Dustil...maybe a scene with Omni and Bandon. But I have so many threads. The Sunry murder, the Hulas and Minden Ravenheart plot, and then Omni/Bandon/Dustil, and this marriage...and of course the whole overall thread with the Star Map... that...well one strand too my. Anyway...I decided to end this on a cliffhanger and stay away from any POVs that involved Revan/Phoenix and this will make the third part much more climatic in many respects.

On a personal note…I am done with culinary school…

Ether: Yea...devious Phoenix...heh...she is such a bad little smuggler/Jedi. She's very naughty. As for telling Carth well…we will see how that goes….

Kosiah: Ch. 76. Yeah, Juhani and Mission have a lot of connection points. So does Jolee and Juhani in this chapter too. Ch. 77. Well not so much of a reveal of threads more of a deeper delving into threads. But I swear next chapter I'll get to reveal more...if not I'll eat my own humble pie, and it may taste like apple pie too. lol


	79. Chapter 78:Manaan:Best Laid Plans part3

**Chapter 78: Manaan The Best Laid Plans (Part 3)**

 **~Phoenix~**

I walked around Ahto the smell of salt in the air, and the smell of the ocean filled me. I felt free for once. Even though I was walking around on the business of the Jedi Order, I pretended just this once I was free. No Malak and no Bastila. I was Phoenix Star, smuggler extraordinaire and I was on one of my smuggler's runs. Although a glance at my lightsabers on my hip reminded me that I was tied to the Order and tied to the Force. I sighed as I ran my fingers through my hair and found the padawan braid…another reminder that I was indeed tied to the Order and the Jedi.

Revan's laugh peeled through my head. Oh yeah...that too. I was running around with a Sith Lord in my mind and body that seemed to take no pleasure in reminding me that they were a part of my life. I muttered lightly. "Go away..."

 _No. I am having fun living your life. Phoenix Star...smuggler extraordinaire…hahaha...really?! You must really be on something. Can I have some of it too?_

I said nothing and Revan chuckled. _You really should tell Carth about me. We're going to have so much fun. You, me, and Carth. It's going to be so entertaining._

I muttered once again. "Go away..."

I had not been paying attention and a woman in a Sith uniform suddenly stated. "Back off Republic dog! You couldn't hope to compare to a real woman!"

I was getting really annoyed between Revan's taunting and this woman's prattle; I had had it and snapped. "You better change your attitude, or the selkath might find your body floating in the ocean!"

The woman suddenly glared at me. "Are you threatening me? It's illegal to try to start a fight in Ahto City! Constable – over here! This Republic scum is trying to break the peace! "

A selkath came over and rumbled in its deep throaty voice. "Is this true human? Are you threatening this woman with violence?"

I snorted and looked at the woman and then at the selkath. "Meaningless taunts...nothing more nothing less."

The officer responded, "I am not deaf, human. I heard your words, and threatening physical violence is not permitted in Ahto City."

I glared at the woman angry and disgusted at everything. I didn't want to deal with this and let the Force come to me and gently waved my hand in a form of persuasion and said to the guard,"This argument was the fault of the Sith. She should be arrested."

The guard responded, "Yes – you are correct, human. The Sith is the one at fault."

The woman's eyes went wide. Apparently, she thought a Jedi didn't have the guts to do this. She gasped, "Me? I didn't do anything! This is an outrage! A travesty of justice!"

I slight grin appeared on my face, and the guard stated, "Come with me to the Ahto City prisons. We will alert your Embassy, and you shall be released when they pay the fine. Though I've known the Sith to let, their people languish in the prison for many months before securing their release."

The woman glared at me and said, "I'll get you for this, Jedi! The Sith won't stand for this!"

"Yea well...you shouldn't have messed with me, Sith scum."I wandered off and Revan laughed. _You enjoyed that...didn't you?_

I sighed and muttered. "Yea...I did."

 _Good. You should do that more often._

I muttered. "We're at war with the Sith. She deserved it and… I am at **war** with you."

 _You can't win against me, Phoenix. No matter how hard you try running, I will be there. You know this._

"Go frack yourself, Revan."

The voice of the Sith Lord disappeared. I sighed, I did not need this. Revan wanted me to act more aggressively. I was supposed to get married to Carth, and it was a good thing Carth had not seen me act like this. He probably would have been concerned and troubled about me. I began wondering if it was a good idea for me to get married to him. How could I have a life with him if I had Revan possessing my mind and body? Plus there was what happened with Bastila. I bowed my head sadly and a few tears dripped down my eyes. Yet, I so badly wanted to be his wife.

I crossed the threshold to the Republic Embassy, and Carth was waiting for me. "There you are. The others are inside. Jordo has a job, and Zaalbar is waiting to see the Ambassador about protection for Kashyyyk."

I nodded quietly. Carth frowned. "What's the matter, love?"

"I...I don't know about this."

"You're just nervous...my little Raven. It's just pre-wedding jitters. You'll feel better just as soon as we get this over and done with."

"Perhaps...look Carth...I have some business with the Order I have to take care of first before we...well...and...I need to talk to you about something...I am not sure you'll want to marry me."

Carth frowned. "Look...I love you. You love me...whatever it is...you're worried about it can wait till after we are married."

I shook my head. "Please Carth..."

He put a finger to my lips. "Shh..."

He then took his finger away and kissed me, a grin on his face as he did so. "Are you sure you still don't want to get married?"

I started crying and he shook his head. "Are you sure you're not...umm…pregnant?"

I turned deep red and I dried my tears. "Damn it Carth...is that all you can think about? Us having...a kid? We've had this conversation before."

"Well,...you're getting all moody all of a sudden. Plus the way you sometimes act at times, getting all emotional at unusual times, I mean I kissed you and you started crying... I can't help but think...I keep thinking...you've got something going on...and..."

"Listen here...Republic...just because I am "moody" doesn't mean I am pregnant. Geez...stop acting like the stereotypical idiot male. You do realize most women would probably tare into you like a starved rancor for that comment alone."

Carth chuckled. "Yea, I know...but I worry about you enough to risk it."His hand went through my hair."I know what the problem is..."

I frowned. "You do?"

"Yea...you've always been business first and then yourself. If you keep acting like that, love; you'll end up physically drained and back in a damn kolto tank because you're so busy thinking about others you never think about yourself for once. You do have business with the Embassy, don't you?"

I nodded. "Yes but..."

"No buts...I won't take no for an answer, Phoenix. We love each other and...I know you, you think too much for your own good. I am not letting you talk yourself out of us getting married. I'll wait for you, love. I know you have to ask the Ambassador about what he knows about the Star Map but after that, we're getting married."

"But...Carth..."

He held up a hand and then wandered off. Fracking hell…how could I tell him anything? He was determined we were going to get married, and I felt like running away. Maybe I could…after all, I ran away from Sorran Naberrie. But could I honestly run away from Carth Onasi? I'd break his heart, but I'd break it with what I had to tell him as well. I sighed...what was I going to do?

I took a deep breath, time to go see Roland Wann and help Master Jax with her kolto issues.

* * *

 **Roland Wann**

I stared at the Jedi, a female human with dark black hair and eyes and we stood for a few moments measuring each other up. She didn't seem to be a threat, but that could change. I didn't trust Jedi, a Jedi one moment could be a Sith the next. My arms and legs suddenly throbbed. The pain of memory, of being tortured and having my arms and legs broken by the Sith. I had an allergy to kolto and so I had spent months in a hospital with more conventional treatments and had been lucky to be alive. All the doctors and even Jedi healers had said my recovery was due to my tough spirit and the will of the Force.

The Force, the Force, indeed. I wish the Force never existed. It caused more problems than it was worth. My left leg turned in on itself at an odd angle. I leaned on a cane. I had become an old man way before my time. All these damn Jedi, they thought the power they wielded, the Force they called it, made them better than others. I said in a very cold tone, "What do you want, Master Jedi?"

She took a breath and said calmly. "I have come on behalf of Master Jula Jax…she requests..."

I cut her off. "I know very well what she wants. Kolto...but she's not getting it. The Republic military needs it more than the Jedi Order. You have your powers anyway...why don't you use them and leave the kolto to us?"

She lightly waved her hand and said firmly. "You wish to help the Jedi Order by offering up some of your kolto."

I rolled my eyes, a mind trick...really! This woman must have been really something to think she could try the most standard and basic of Jedi powers on me.

"I wouldn't try that again if I were you. The Republic Military Elite has trained me to resist such things."

She offered a slight grin. "I heard that...I just wanted to...umm...test...to see if...well if that was really the case."

I snorted. "I see...and if that doesn't work...what will you do to get your way? Force lighting maybe. Maybe you'll cause me to lose control of my bodily functions to try and convince me to give up our kolto. I've experienced that as well from those you claim are **not** Jedi."

She sighed. "You've been wronged, Ambassador and I am sorry that others have abused their powers on you. But such use of the Force is wrong."

"Yea and who determines what's right and wrong? Some sort of code of honor? Your vaunted Jedi Council?"

The woman paused in thought and then said "Semantics. Right and wrong are determined by what a person believes is right or wrong. The Sith who wronged you believed their might was what made them right. But in your own way...you have already made up your mind that you are right in regards to not sharing a small bit of your kolto with the Jedi Order. But the best way to understand what is right and wrong is to try and respect all sides; because what is right for me may be wrong to you and what is wrong to you may be right to me. In the end, all sides need to come to an agreement where both sides feel they have neither been wronged but feel some degree of rightness and all are satisfied in some way. Not saying that always works...but...how can I make things right for you, Ambassador Wann?"

I raised an eyebrow, who was this woman? She had the fine skill of a seasoned diplomat."Who are you master Jedi?"

She bowed before me and said. "I am not a master...I am just a Padawan. My name is Phoenix...Phoenix Star."

"I see..."

Hmm...I had received a missive from Admiral Dodonna about a Jedi Padawan named Phoenix Star. However, my missive had told me to just watch her and not to do anything rash; unless she threatened the Republic or did anything that harmed the Embassy on Manaan. If she did, I was to contact Republic military intelligence. I wondered why Admiral Dodonna wanted me to watch this particular Jedi Padawan. What interest did Military Intelligence have in one lone padawan? The Missive gave no other information as to why. Unless...they did not trust her.

I had little trust for any Jedi, but this one intrigued me. She seemed well spoken and yet she spoke with a sort of drawl that I normally heard from Outliers. It betrayed a person that hailed from the outer rim and not from the galactic core. An Outlier Jedi? From what I knew of the Jedi, they did not normally train individuals from the Outer Rim. They tended to take their members from the Core part of the galaxy. This meant this woman was an oddity and probably had not gone through the whole taken as a child to be trained as a Jedi thing that the Jedi were so want to do so now. So her skill in diplomacy had more than likely not come from the Jedi.

"Tell me, Ms. Star, where did you come upon such...diplomatic skill? I think not with the Jedi, judging on your Outlier drawl. You're from the Outer Rim...if I am not mistaken and the Jedi don't normally take its members from the Outer Rim."

The woman slightly turned red, probably from embarrassment. I assumed it was probably from me figuring out her lowly heritage.

"I am from Deralia, Ambassador Wann. I was a smuggler before…I fell upon hard times and had to hire myself out to the Republic. I was posted on the Endar Spire and...well long story short...I was told I had some skill with the Force and the next thing I knew the Jedi decided to train me. As for my skill in negotiation, I wasn't always a smuggler. My family was a bunch of merchants and farmers. I always had to try and get the best deal on things for my family."

I frowned. Why would the Admiral be so interested in a redneck Jedi? This made no sense. "I see..."

She coughed and then said. "Anyway...Ambassador, how can I make things right for you?"

"You can make things right by going away and not asking about the kolto."

She chuckled. "Yea...that isn't going to happen, and you know it."

I laughed with her."Well, I did give you the easiest solution but...you..."I paused."You intrigue Ms. Star. Perhaps there is something we can arrange but..."

My voice became stern. "...don't let this confuse you; this does not make us, friends, or even allies. The next time we meet...you could be my enemy. You could do terrible things to me with your powers. You Force users are all the same to me, no matter what side of the Force you claim you use. I don't trust you, Ms. Star or any of the Jedi for that matter."

She sighed and gave me a look as if she was slightly fatigued and annoyed at my statements. "You remind me of someone..." She paused a moment and then said, "but I understand. Trust must be earned, it can also be lost. But I have given you no reason for you not to trust me."

"No, but you haven't given me a reason **to** trust you."

She nodded. "Then how can I earn your trust?"

I looked thoughtful trying to think about what would make me trust a Force User. "Your life."

She frowned and then crossed her arms in a manner that made her look defensive. "What do you mean by that?"

"If you can risk your life, I might be able to trust you."

"Even then I am unsure if you'd trust me."

I nodded. "You're right, Ms. Star..." After all Republic intelligence seemed to not trust her for some odd reason. Why they didn't say...well...it was a mystery. Apparently, my security clearance wasn't high enough to know why a smuggler made Jedi was under Republic intelligence scrutiny.

"I set my standards high, Ms. Star. If you...sacrifice more of yourself I may be more inclined to think you're not going to stab me or others in the back."

"I see…" She paused. "Well, Master Jax has stated she is willing to give a portion of the Jedi's kolto shipment when it's prepared...in exchange for a portion of yours. But the Republic and the Sith military are getting their kolto before the Jedi can have their portion. Master Jax worries about the delay. Yes, you are right the Jedi can utilize their powers for healing but...not every Jedi is a healer, Ambassador Wann. You wish me to sacrifice my life to prove I won't hurt you or others...fine. Tell me what you want me to do, and I'll do it."

She then sighed and said, "But promise me if I fail and do die...you will give the kolto to Master Jax and the Jedi Order.

I raised an eyebrow, this woman seemed very determined to get her way even if she died in the process. I couldn't argue her resolve. I did have something she could do, and I said to her. "We were using a submersible reconnaissance droid in the ocean surrounding Ahto City, and it was... damaged. It took a data recording of the outside of the city before being driven off by the firaxan sharks. But while it was returning to the surface, it encountered difficulties and was disabled. Its automatic systems floated it to the surface, but we could not retrieve it in time. The Sith were applying subtle pressure to the Selkath authorities for some reason we have not determined and were able to delay us long enough that they could retrieve the droid before we did. The droid's data centers are heavily encrypted, so it will take the Sith several days, we believe, to get to its data. It was captured 12 hours ago. It is imperative we get it back!"

Ms. Star sighed. "Let me guess...you want me to simply waltz into the Sith Embassy and retrieve it."

I nodded and responded. "It is heavily guarded, we are sure, in the Sith Embassy here on Manaan. Since we have no remaining soldiers to spare, and certainly not our elite ones, we have no one capable of entering the Sith base and retrieving it. That is what we would ask you to do."

Ms. Star groaned. "Fantastic and what's so important about this data recording anyway?"

"It's intelligence information about Sith activities on Manaan, as well as some oceanographic reports on the local marine life."

Ms. Star looked at me and said firmly, "Intelligence information and marine reports?! Why do I get the feeling there is more to it than that?"

I smiled lightly but said nothing more about what the droid held in its data banks. "I have a passkey that you can take to get into a secret entrance of the Sith Embassy. We retrieved it from a spy. After you retrieve the database and it's information...then we can talk about getting that kolto shipment to the Order."

She sighed. "Actually…my overall mission is not to bring kolto to the Enclave."She paused."My mission is…well, I am looking for some ruins...I think they may be underwater, somewhere."

"Ruins?"

I looked at the woman. "I know nothing of any ruins, Jedi. Why do you bother me over such a thing?"

"Because you might know of a way down to the ocean floor."

I nodded. "I might, but we're not ready to talk of that Ms. Star. Fulfill my task Ms. Star, and we'll talk later about it in greater detail."

She sighed and looked at me with a weary look on her features. "Very well, ambassador…"

* * *

 **~Carth~**

I waited patiently for Phoenix to return from the ambassador. Although I could have gone with her I decided she needed her space and as much as I wanted to be with her. I knew that going into the room with her would have made an awkward situation even worse.

Phoenix came out of the ambassador's office a grim look on her face. I gave her a smile. "That bad, huh?"

She sighed. "I have to attack the Sith Embassy, Carth."

My jaw dropped. "What?! Is he crazy?"

"Maybe. He wants me to retrieve the data recording device for a probe that the Sith have in their possession. You know the Sith aren't going to give that up. At least not willingly. So..."

I watched as Phoenix lightly fingered her lightsabers and I shook my head. "I am going with you. Don't try and talk me out of it, Phoenix. But...we'll go together as man and wife."

"Carth...we can't."

"No...Phoenix...I told you."

"Damn it Carth...you need to listen to me."

She glared at me daggers in her eyes. "Please...we need to talk..."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

His lips suddenly came on mine again... and I gulped as he kissed me and my shoulders slumped. I was trapped. I couldn't say no...well, I could but...I felt swept up in the kiss. I wanted so badly to be his wife and he finally stopped. "There...you still want to say no, yet again!"

I shook my head negatively. "I...just...it's complicated Carth. Please...I need to tell you something."

"After we're married."

"By then it will be too late..."

Carth suddenly said to me. "Look...this is no time to get cold feet."

"It's not cold feet."

"We spent so much time, plotting on this Phoenix. You know that. Getting Bastila, and Canderous out of the way and now you don't…."

I sighed. Carth had a point. We had come this far, and the only thing stopping us was my guilt. I sighed. "Carth...I am not **that** noble or even virtuous. You should know…well..."

"Virtue? You're going to talk about your other relationships? I kind of figured I wasn't the first in your life...I know you're not...well...you have a past that I know so little about. You were a smuggler; you could have had a guy or gal at every spaceport for all I know. I haven't pried too much into your past and maybe… ."

Carth paused. "Maybe I don't want to know about that. You've had a rough life, Phoenix. From what I've dragged out of you...you lost your family. At least I know Dustil is alive, but you...your whole family is dead. I wouldn't fault you if...you had a relationship with Calo Nord even."

I turned beet red. "Calo Nord...that ugly mug! Hell no! Honestly Carth, you could have said I had a relationship with anyone except... Calo-fracking-Nord. He wanted me dead, twice...or maybe even three times…considering the fact what I've pieced together since our travels."

Carth laughed. "I know my little Blackbird...I mean that was probably a bad example..."

I snorted. "Yea...way off base, Republic. Would you love me even if?"I paused I was scared if I did reveal everything about me and Bastila."What if...well...if I had a relationship with…" I sighed."If I had a relationship with..."

I couldn't find the words, and don't know why but since we were on the track of Calo Nord. I was about to say something about me having a relationship with Saul Karath. As unlikely as that seemed and I was worried that such a thing would make Carth angry but before I could say it...

Carth held up his hand. "No... don't go there, Phoenix. I don't want to hear about your past relationships."

"But..."

"No buts, Phoenix. I told you I don't want to hear about what relationships you've had. I know you've had a rough life and think you've been entitled to your past to...well have a guy or gal at every spaceport."

I coughed, and my face probably was still flushed. "Seriously Carth, I am **not** that kind of woman!"

Carth shook his head. "Even if you are...or were...all I care is about the here and now. We've both had a rough life and damn it, Phoenix we're both entitled to some happiness. So come on...let's go talk to that ambassador about getting married."

I looked skyward and then my head sunk. I felt verbally defeated because as far as Carth was concerned we were going to get married. He loved me so much he was willing to forgive my past even though he had no idea how...unfaithful I had been. Yet as I looked up and gazed into Carth's brown eyes, so full of hope, love, and patience. I gave in...I couldn't hurt this man by refusing to get married. Yet I'd hurt him by saying something about my affair with Bastila. I loved him more than...well more than what had occurred with Bastila, of that I was sure. I sighed. "Fine...Republic. Let's go get married."

* * *

 **~Dustil~**

I walked into the cantina to celebrate my successful mission. My mission had been easy, I made friends quickly with the selkath youth. There wasn't much to do here for fun and the selkath were of a restless nature. I started a slow casual friendship showing the selkath that being afraid of the Sith and claiming we were some sort of boogeyman was something that their parents and the Republic made up. The youth seemed more curious of a young man like me being with the Sith rather than an adult.

For a few days, we played a few games of pazaak and some dejarik. Finally, the last step of getting the selkath to come with me to the embassy was to invite them to a party. By the end of the party, Lord Bandon was able to segregate the ones who had the Force and encouraged them to learn those ways from the Sith. They readily agreed to stay at the Embassy and be trained. I grinned at Lord Bandon, my work in bringing the selkath youth to the Sith worked. Those who did not have the Force he mentioned would be taken care off. He didn't say what would happen to them because he gave me a look that basically did not invite me to ask. But those who didn't have the Force were weak, according to Master Uthar. The Force was what made us superior.

I took a seat and ordered a drink. A blue-skinned twi'lek sighed forlornly. "Nix is gonna kill me."

I frowned and then said firmly. "Then kill her before she kills you."

The twi'lek's jaw dropped at my statement. She looked at me and stared at me like I was going to slice her open with a lightsaber. Yet considering some of the Sith around here, I couldn't blame the look she had.

"You wouldn't understand, you nerf herder…you're a Sith. Why do you Sith take things so literally anyway? Besides, I don't think Nix will actually kill me. She's just going to be upset that...well...that's a long story."

"Who is this Nix, anyway?"

I sighed. "It's short for Phe...Pho...err..."

"Phoenix?"

The girl nodded.

I suddenly laughed. There was something amusing about a twi'lek that had problems pronouncing names.

She glared at me. "What so funny?"

"You. I mean...do you always have issues pronouncing names?"

"Listen here, Sith boy It's a good thing we're on Manaan or I'd throttle you."

I laughed again. Something about this girl was slightly naive and yet...gutsy. "Throttle me? I'd like to see you try." I laid my hand on my lightsaber.

She snorted. "Yeah...be a bully. That's so typical for a Sith. You're obviously Force sensitive seeing that lightsaber on you. Listen here...I may not be Force-sensitive but I have friends that could wipe the floor with you."

"Oooh, I am scared."

She glared at me. "You should be, Sith boy. My friends are Jedi."

"Oooh, Jedi. Some tough girl you are, threatening me with your Jedi friends."

"Well, you started it, putting your hand on your lightsaber. Sith boy!"

I shook my head. "And you threatened me by saying you were going to throttle me!"

The girl's lekku twitched. "Listen here...you little punk. I was joking! Seriously...you Sith take everything way too seriously."

"I take things seriously! You don't threaten someone and say it's a joke. At the academy on Korriban if a Sith said what you said they would be dead!"

The girl suddenly spouted back. "But I am not a Sith and we're not **on** Korriban."

I was about to angrily spout something back, but the girl was right. She definitely wasn't a Sith, and we weren't on Korriban.

She glared daggers at me still and suddenly a beep was heard. I saw an astromech droid roll up and the girl stated. "No, I am fine T3. You don't have to shock him...well unless he actually does draw that lightsaber of his."

I glowered at the girl. I should just kill her for her insolence, but we were on Manaan and I couldn't do a damn thing.

She then spoke. "Look Sith boy, I didn't ask for you to interrupt my bemoaning what Nix was going to do to me for fracking up her marriage."

I raised an eyebrow. "Marriage?"

"Yea...she wanted me to distract a rather surly Mandalorian who didn't want her to get married. Anyway, the plan to distract him went cockeyed and blew up all over the place."

I suddenly laughed, considering this girl's temperament I could easily see any plan she came up going haywire.

"What's so funny...do you think this is some sort of joke?"

"No...it's just well...I've never met a kid like you."

The girl suddenly flew off the handle. "Kid! Kid! I am fourteen years old for your information and I've been on my own before even that. And how old are you, Sith boy?"

I couldn't help myself, but this girl made me feel like a school kid back on Telos. Telos where I could still smell the acrid smoke, my whole world burning. My mother screaming...the skin of her flesh burning. I didn't want to recall those memories. Why were those horrible memories coming up now? I sighed. "Sixteen...and a half."

She suddenly laughed. "You're not much older than I am, Sith boy!"

"Would you stop calling me Sith boy?! I have a name you know."

"So what is your name, Sith boy?"

I grinned. "If I told you, I'd have to kill you."

"Oh, so it's like that, huh?"

I grinned. "Yep. I am classified."

Well, I wasn't really classified, but it was fun to play with this naive twi'lek although I had a feeling she wasn't really buying it. I could tell by the peeved off expression on her face.

"Well Classified...I am not gonna tell you my name because I am... classified as well."

I suddenly started laughing at the preposterous statement she had stated and she started laughing as well.

She then stated, "Okay, okay...so I am not classified but...what about you?"

I rolled my eyes. "I...well...I am not classified either but..."

"But what?"

"I really shouldn't be talking to you."

"But why?"

"You admitted you have Jedi as friends and..."

"And what?"

I rolled my eyes. "Do I have to spell this out for you, twi'lek? We're enemies. The next time we meet off this world I could kill you and your friends."

The girl looked at me, alarm on her face. "But why? I haven't done anything to you."

I sighed. "Maybe it's best we parted now before...well before we both do something foolish."

The girl snorted. "Foolish...listen here, you stupid Sith boy. You were foolish to say something to me in the first place."

I had to admit the girl was right. I had really inserted my foot into it. What kind of Sith was I? Not very bright, apparently.

I said firmly, "Look I don't know you, you don't know me and let's leave it at that."

"Fine. Stay away from me, you...you...jerkwad!"

"Fine by me."

"It's true then. All of you, Sith are nothing more than assholes."

I glared at her. I wanted nothing more than make her take those words back.

"Go on...get out of here, Sith boy...you're not wanted here! I'll sic my friend, Jedi Nix on you the next time I see you."

I laughed. "Who's the asshole now, twi'lek? Sic a Jedi on me. Very brave, some punk girl is so heroic she wants to set a Jedi on me. You want me to leave. Fine...I'll leave."

I grabbed my drink and left. What was it about her that seriously got on my nerves?

* * *

 **~Mission~**

T3 beeped at me and I responded, "Yea, I know...I know...I shouldn't peeve off a Sith but what an asshole! He inserts himself into my conversation and then expects me to forget we even met or talked. Seriously…what a jerk!"

T3 beeped::I took care of Canderous...Mission but Bastila is probably going to end Phoenix's wedding and...I could get HK-47 involved, but he'd go too far and…::

"I don't think Nix would like it if HK tried to kill Bastila. Although...those two are kind of tense with each other. I think Nix would be tempted to knuckle-drag Bastila down on her butt, to be honest, but not kill her. Anyway, thanks for trying, T3."

I sighed I still had no idea what I was going to do now. I was bored out of my lekku and with Sith boy gone my only hope at actually having some fun on this planet had disappeared. "Hey T3...you still want to do something about that cheating gamorrean?"

T3 beeped:: What do you have in mind, Mission?::

I gave a slight grin. "I was kind of thinking about fighting sabotage with sabotage, T3. But not exactly sure how to go about it. Maybe...you can figure out a way to get to that gamorrean's…"I paused."Wait a minute...I've got an idea. You know Nix was the Mysterious Stranger on Taris, right? So...all we need is a robe, a cowl, and a challenge. I am pretty sure Nix's endeavors got some play off world, and we could holo-record it and...then play it in front of that gamorrean. I am sure if we give the right amount of street toughness then that gamorrean will cave like the pathetic coward that he is."

:: I've got a better idea, Mission. I can alter recordings of Phoenix and make her look pretty menacing.::

"Sounds good to me, T3. Let's go back to the Hawk and work on it."

We walked back to the Hawk I couldn't wait to get working on an altered holo image of Nix.

* * *

 **~Zaalbar~**

I stood before the ambassador and howled out my request. The ambassador looked at me with a confused look on his face. The ambassador did not understand Shyriiwook. The ambassador barked an order to find a translator or anyone who spoke my language. I found myself surprised to find Jordo enter into the room wearing a fresh Republic uniform.

Jordo grinned a bit at me. "Hey, Zaalbar. Apparently, my experience in the Telosian militia was enough to get me enlisted in as an Ensign but enough talk I am here to help translate for the ambassador."

I nodded and barked. "Tell Ambassador Wann what has happened on Kashyyyk with Czerka and that as the son of Freyya, chieftain of Rookworro that we ask for protection from the Republic."

Jordo sighed. "Very well...Zaalbar."

His sigh did not inspire confidence and barked. "Do you think the Republic can't help my people, Jordo?"

Jordo stated, "Well Zaalbar…."

The ambassador looked at him and Jordo said, "I can't really comment on this...since I am not really your friend now but a Republic soldier and I have to translate for Ambassador Wann. Anyway…"

Jordo translated my statements and the ambassador sighed as well. "I am the ambassador for Manaan, Zaalbar. I have no control over what Czerka does and unfortunately, Czerka is a member of the Republic under the trade laws the Republic has established."

I growled in anger. "Does the Republic know they enslaved my people? Some of them are undoubtedly are still in Czerka slave camps. How can they be members of the Republic if they are seizing my people as slaves? I thought the Republic did not promote slavery."

Jordo translated and the ambassador sighed. "Republic politics are a complicated affair, Zaalbar son of Chieftain Freyya. Since Kashyyyk is not a member of the Republic, you really don't have much recourse and the Republic recognizes the claims of Czerka over your planet than they do and your people over your own planet. They claim that your people are not even sentient."

I grabbed a bust of some dignitary that was on the ambassador's desk and threw it against the wall behind the ambassador. The bust shattered into pieces The ambassador flinched lightly at my violent display and I growled out. "I am here...I speak..my people have a distinct culture. We are just as sentient as you are, Ambassador Wann and I demand on behalf of my people a right to representation."

Jordo translated and the ambassador held up his hands in a non-threatening manner and said calmly. "I can send out a request to the Republic that you wish to become a member planet of the Republic, but there is no guarantee that your people will become a member of our government. However, Czerka has claimed your home as theirs. It's not going to be easy to convince the Senate particularly when Czerka interests and money find a way into senators hands."

I barked out. "Czerka is no longer on our planet. We have driven them away. If they even think of coming back to our home, we will drive them off once again. Kashyyyk is our home and belongs to no one but wookiees."

Jordo translated and the ambassador responded, "Then you may be able to convince the Senate that your people deserve autonomy, considering the circumstances you have made known to me. I wish there was more I could do for you…"

The ambassador paused. "I can provide a token of goodwill from the Republic to help you understand the people of the Republic and our history."

The ambassador unlocked his drawer on his desk and took out an excessively massive book and handed it to me. I looked at the book which stated: The History of the Republic 125th edition.

I growled angrily at the ambassador. "This is an insult. Even Jedi Phoenix Star would know better than to hand me a trinket like this."

I stormed out before Jordo could even translate. I ran into Carth Onasi with Phoenix Star. I growled out what had happened with the ambassador and I watched as Phoenix Star took the book from my hands. She rubbed her hands gingerly over it and sighed. "Calm down…Zaalbar. The ambassador legitimately can't do much. He apparently wants you to learn as much as you can about the Republic before your people become a part of it. You might..."She paused and then said, "You might decide that it's not in your planet's best interest to be part of the Republic."

I looked at the woman I was life-debted to and I cocked my head curious at her response and barked out. "Why do you say such things? My people would be better united with the Republic, don't you think so?"

Carth seemed to agree with me. "What? How could you say that, Phoenix? I thought...well, I thought you believed in the Republic."

She shook her head. "I do, Carth but…" She sighed. "The Republic is at war with the Sith. You just got rid of Czerka, Zaalbar. Do you think your planet could be able to repel an invasion by Malak? And consider what Malak did to Taris. You join the Republic you're just asking for Malak and the Sith to retaliate and they might even end up doing something much worse than Czerka."

"What could Malak do that would be worse than what Czerka has done?"

Phoenix Star looked at me with a firm and cold expression on her face. "Complete and total genocide with your whole race wiped out. Now, do you still want to be a part of the Republic?"

Carth frowned. "You don't know that, Phoenix! How can you presume Malak would do that?"

Phoenix Star's features took on a weary almost tired look. "Taris is dead and dying, Telos is dead or dying. It seems to me that Malak feeds off...the destruction he wields. What would be the lives of billions of wookiees to him? That is the curse of the Dark Side. It gluts itself like a hutt and then there is no end to its hunger. Eventually, all things end up dead. What good is the Dark Side if...it ends with all life being snuffed out? Eventually, the practitioner of it ends up starving itself and ends up dead. Such a sad pathetic existence. I…."

"You what, Phoenix?" Carth queried.

"I pity Malak. Maybe I am wrong to feel for him in such a way. But his strength and his might are only temporary. In the end, if we do not stop him...he will ultimately end up shriveled up and dead."

Phoenix Star seemed to be in a strange sort of mood. She did not seem herself at this moment. Her words seemed like something a wise old shaman of my people would say.

"Yea, but we will end up dead as well...Phoenix!" Carth Onasi stated shaking his head."How can you show pity on such a man?"

"It is a Jedi trait to show mercy and pity for one's enemies, Carth."

"But he wants to kill you, Phoenix! And capture Bastila."

Phoenix Star nodded. "I am aware of that, Republic. But how can I be a better person if I do not show mercy and compassion?"

Carth Onasi shook his head. "There are times I just don't get Jedi philosophy particularly when I know Malak wouldn't show the same regard."

Phoenix Star sighed. "You don't have to, Republic. It's okay, though..." She smiled and then kissed Carth Onasi on his nose. "I still love you."

I cringed, something about the expression of love made me miss my mate.

Carth Onasi then said, "We're getting married, Zaalbar. Do you want to be a witness to our marriage?"

I barked happily, "I would be honored Carth Onasi to see this merging of souls together. I told Mission earlier, that I wanted to be a part of your marriage since you were a part of mine."

Phoenix Star was suddenly quiet. She looked a lot older than she was, it seemed like she was mulling over our conversation. Something clearly was troubling her, and it probably had to deal with the fact that she was going to end up facing off against Malak. We wandered back into the ambassador's chambers…

* * *

 **~Jula Jax~**

I watched as Bastila ran off and shook my head, so much for helping Revan's father. Apparently, Bastila was too entangled in her bond with Revan that she let her attachments dictate her actions rather than sense. I felt like I was getting way too old for obnoxious padawans and their reckless actions. I sighed and took a seat by a stall. Which, of course, prompted a twi'lek merchant to come over. The merchant hissed at me in Ryl, "You can't sit here, human. Unless you buy food from my stall."

I sighed. I dug out a couple of credit chips on me. "Let me sit for at least ten minutes, if you wish to bring me a bottle of fizzade I would be most appreciative."

The twi'lek came back and handed me the bottle and looked at me still seeming a bit angry I took a seat.

I smiled gently and pushed back my cloak showing my lightsaber and the twi'lek grumbled profanities under his breath but went back to his stall. I had to admit that sometimes having a lightsaber defused many anxious moments. I quietly sipped my drink and looked around the marketplace. I hoped maybe I would find Hulas as I sat and gazed over the marketplace.

Consuming my drink, I got up and resumed my search. I spoke with every rodian I could find. Most of them all denied that they were Hulas or even knew him. Hmm...that was intriguing since I found it unusual that all the rodians in this marketplace would even deny knowing one of their own species. Perhaps news had gotten out that I was a Jedi and I was looking for the assassin.

So it seemed a passive approach was the best way for me to deal with the rodian, assuming I found him. I walked over to another stall and began to casually look at some jewelry. Various crystals, gems. From deep colors of purple to brilliant red. They could be used in my lightsaber if I had half the mind to purchase them. A rodian in the stall came over and rodian stated quietly, "I hear you have been looking for me, Jedi."

My head snapped forward. "Hulas, I presume."

The rodian smiled. "You are correct, Jedi. My name is Hulas. I have so much more than jewelry if you are interested."

"I am sure you do. I've been told that you sell weapons."

"Keep your voice down, if the fish people found out I was selling weapons they would revoke my license and..."

I chuckled for a moment and said firmly. "I am not here about weapons, Hulas. I am here to silence you. You're too close to a certain Jedi and their family and I can't allow that."

Hulas frowned and then laughed. "Silly Jedi, I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't know anything about a Jedi and their family."

"Oh, I think you do, Hulas. I think you do. Does the name Minden Ravenheart ring any bells?"

The Rodian's eyes narrowed. "Revan..."

"Indeed. I can't allow you to harm Revan's family."

I didn't want to do this; part of me knew this was wrong, so terribly wrong, but I had to keep Revan safe and those connected with her safe. So I reached out with the Force and the rodian's skin became a tinge of green over his orange colored skin. He hissed out. "What have you done to me, Jedi?" He reeled over and grasped his stomach in obvious pain, and he began retching and his stomach emptied out onto the floor. He groaned, and he fell to the ground. "Please Jedi...stop..."

I gave a cold passionless stare at the rodian. "You will leave Revan's father alone, Hulas. If you don't then, I will hunt you down and the next time we meet you may not survive this sickness."

Hulas managed to stand up. "You should kill me, Jedi. Not threaten. To be killed that is the way of..."

"Of an assassin. Do I look like an assassin? I am not an assassin, but I deliver a message from an assassin to you. Leave Revan's family alone. They wanted me to kill you, but killing is not the Jedi way."

Hulas ears pricked up. "An overseer...where?"

I had no idea who an overseer was, but apparently, it was another assassin perhaps the one who had given Bastila the request to kill Hulas. I kept my face impassive and played along with it. In fact, that gave me an idea. "You know I can't tell you where the overseer is. He is watching you Hulas if you even think of touching Revan's family, he will send me once again to kill you. You know finding you was easy. So think how easy it will be to find you again."

Hulas nodded. "The message is received Jedi...I will leave Revan's family alone…for now."

I glared at him and sent another wave of nausea to Hulas. "Not ever...Hulas. Do you hear me?"

The rodian groaned and began to dry heave. "I...I..."he gagged and he said."Stop...please stop."

"Swear to me you will leave Revan's family alone."

"I swear it by your Force...I won't go after Revan's family."

I nodded. "Good. I will leave now. You will recover in time."

I walked away from Hulas' stall and took a huge sigh of relief. Hopefully the rodian would keep his word and hopefully, this would be enough to mollify the assassin that told Bastila to kill him.

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

I sighed as we left Elora's apartment. I was no arbitrator and knew it. I had no gift for legalese, and I wondered how I was going to get Sunry out of this mess.

I was quiet as we left and Juhani stated. "Jolee...we are not arbitrators, and I know this certain thing is not my strength or yours but...I know Phoenix handled a murder case back on Dantooine. She might not be an arbitrator but...I think she may be our best shot in helping your friends out."

I shook my head and gave another heavy sigh. "It's a mess, Juhani. The worst that could happen is that Sunry ends up executed, at best he's locked away in prison. I don't even know how to even start on this and Phoenix...well, she's so busy in her own little world...and...I don't think..."

My conversations with Revan revealed one thing, a mixed up woman who thought she was another person altogether. She knew she had issues with her memory but how far those issues went...well, it was obvious Revan had no clue how deep they went. Bastila seemed to mirror Revan's fragmented mind with her own personal issues. Did I dare put another burden on Revan's shoulders? How much could either woman take before they snapped?

"But what choice do we have? If you or I take this murder case and Sunry is found guilty it will be due to our lack of experience."

"And what makes you think Phoenix has any more experience than we do, Juhani?"

"I know she saved my life back on Taris, Jolee. Even though she has no memory of it. I know she is capable of much…perhaps more than you even realize."

I paused, apparently, the Cathar had met Revan sometime during her life as well.

"Fine...we will enlist Phoenix's help. But if she refuses then we must respect her decision."

"I don't think she'll refuse, Jolee."

I snorted. "Yea, and that's what I am afraid of."

We walked on to the embassy where I was pretty certain we would find Carth and Revan. We walked into the embassy to find Revan and Zaalbar alone and no sign of Carth anywhere. Revan had a concerned look on her face. She said to me. "The ambassador won't marry us, Jolee."

"What! Preposterous...if this was the Ukatis system, you'd be married by now. Did the ambassador state why he wouldn't marry you?"

"He said it was because I was a Jedi and...he wouldn't marry us."

I snorted. "That's against Republic laws, Kid. You can't deny someone marriage because of their religious stance."

Phoenix sighed. "Yea...but I can't exactly go running to the masters and claim them to defend me they're against Jedi getting married."

I snorted. "Well, I'll stand up for you, kid. I am just as good as a master...maybe even better."

Revan sputtered. "But didn't you say you weren't a Jedi?"

"Bah...technicalities...I may not be a Jedi, but I know the Force and I know I am better than any stodgy old master in the Order."

"But...I am not even..."Revan paused and then said, "Look, Jolee, maybe this is the Force's way of telling us that we simply are not meant to be together."

I looked incredulously at Revan. "Nonsense the Force...isn't like that at all. The Force obviously brought you two together for a reason."

Zaalbar began interjecting. "The Hairless One is right. Fate brought you two together. I never thought I would see Whrrl again and yet I did."

"Of course I am right, Zaalbar. Listen to me, kid. If you and Carth were meant to meet then, you were meant to be together."

Juhani nodded. "I will stand by you as well, Phoenix."

Revan bowed her head. "I appreciate the support. Really I do! But." She sighed."I have my doubts about...well...maybe..."

"Look kid...it's your life. If you honestly want Carth in it then you should fight for him."

Revan gave a weary sigh and was quiet. I wondered if Revan had told Carth about her relationship with Bastila but seeing how Revan was acting, I doubted she had. I laid a hand on her shoulder.

I whispered quietly into her ear. "Kid...you've got to tell him."

She said softly to me. "Damn it, Old Man, I am trying. I really am."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

My jaw dropped wide opened as Ambassador Rolland Wann refused to marry Phoenix and me.

I glared at him as he pulled me into a private room away from Phoenix and he said, "You've apparently lost your mind, Captain Onasi. You do realize that by marrying her you'll likely kill your military career."

"I don't care…I love her."

"So you'd sacrifice everything to be with some…Jedi harlot."

I glared at him. "Don't you dare call Phoenix that!"

"She's a Jedi. You're a Captain in the Republic Navy. Think...think hard before you throw your career away, Captain Onasi. The Republic military needs you. It needs you more than some sort of fantasy you're having with some Jedi who isn't allowed to marry or even have attachments of any sort."

"She's going to leave the Order."

The ambassador rolled his eyes. "Oh, I see...so she would be a rogue Jedi. That's even worse in many respects. The Republic will be all over your wife. Don't you see that, Captain Onasi? She leaves the Order...then you and especially her will be eyed with suspicion. A rogue Jedi might as well be a Sith or a Dark Jedi. Don't you understand, Captain? Even if she leaves her Order, she will still kill your career."

"Then I will submit my resignation to the Republic fleet."

"You know very well you can't leave the military, Captain Onasi. We need you, I don't think I have to reiterate our war with the Sith is going very badly. Can you really do that? Resign with a war against the Sith going on?"

I sighed, the ambassador had a point. "I love her, Ambassador Wann. I..."

"Then don't marry her."

"What!"

"You heard me. You can have whatever relationship you wish with her...but if you want to salvage whatever remains of your professional lives both her as a Jedi and you as a military officer then don't marry her."

"But...look...I already have that Ambassador. But I want a proper life with her. I want a family and children."

The ambassador sighed. "I see. I can't change your mind...can I?"

I nodded. "No, you can't."

The ambassador said, "As much as I am appalled at your decision, Captain Onasi. It is your life but..."The ambassador paused and then stated quietly, "There is another option. I can't marry you Captain Onasi. I could but then...your life as a Captain pretty much would be over. Yet...any priest or religious authority can marry you and that marriage would be binding under Republic Law. There is an ithorian priest that is residing here at the Embassy with his herd. He and his herd are planning to leave for Telos soon. They came here to gather some of the marine life for...well, I am getting ahead of myself. Anyway, he said to me earlier he had some sort of vision about healing the planet. The Republic has granted them permission to go there and try and help in some fledgling recovery efforts;but I am sure he'd be happy to arrange a "private" unassuming ceremony. He'd also likely be willing to keep your confidence. You'd be married but...as far as anyone knows you'd still be known as separate entities and your career and hers would be unmarred.

"So a secret marriage."

The ambassador nodded. "Indeed, Captain Onasi."

I sighed. "I am not sure I like the idea. I think Phoenix and I were hoping for a more open expression of our love but..."

The ambassador stated softly. "Perhaps one day you'll be able to be more open with your marriage, Captain. But today is not that day. I will direct you to Chodo Habat. He should be able to marry you two without much fuss."He handed me a datapad with directions on how to reach him.

"Thank you, Ambassador Wann...I was told that you weren't exactly kind to Jedi."

The ambassador snorted. "I am not...but there is something about this Jedi of yours that…Well, she's sharp as a tack. I...well, I can see why she has won your heart, Captain Onasi. But be careful with her…she is a Force user and...well, they all have issues. She could...well...a Jedi one day could be a Sith the next. There is..."

I cut the ambassador off. "I use to think that about everyone, Ambassador. But...Phoenix is different she has made me realize that..."

The ambassador gave me a stern look as he cut me off. "Listen here Captain Onasi, your fiance is under Republic surveillance. She's being watched, but for what I am unsure. But if she even sneezes the wrong way, Republic intelligence will be on her. You should keep some of your suspicions about her. There is something wrong about the fact that Republic intelligence would keep an eye on a Jedi padawan and..."

My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe the Republic would do this to her. Yet, I had suspicions earlier and somehow I let my guard relax and I had waited for Phoenix to somehow betray me and she hadn't. "Look I had those exact thoughts about her back on Taris. And I admit that she's a bit unorthodox with some of her methods but she has proved herself time and time again that she is a trusted ally to the Republic."

The ambassador snorted. "I'll believe it when I see it. Speaking of which I've sent her off on a mission to do exactly that."

"Yea, I heard about that from her. You're basically sending her on a suicide mission into the Sith embassy. I can't believe you'd send her off into death's waiting arms!"

"If she's loyal to the Republic as you so claim, Captain Onasi then she'll do this mission without question. If she's not..."

I glared at the ambassador. "I am leaving Ambassador. Your methods disgust me. My wife isn't meant to be cannon fodder. And I will report you for this."

The ambassador chuckled. "Go ahead...report me, Captain. Your wife may be a traitor. It's the only rationale I can come up with as to why Republic intelligence is so keen on keeping tabs on her."

"Phoenix...A traitor…NEVER!"

I stormed out of the private room and found Phoenix along with Juhani and Jolee.

"Come on Phoenix...let's go find someone who actually will marry us!"

"But Carth..."

"There's some ithorian priest in the embassy that will marry us and we're going to him."

"An ithorian? But…"

She looked up at Jolee, Zaalbar, and Juhani for a moment and looked as though she was a lost puppy. I snatched her by the hand. "Come on, Phoenix…"

I jerked her forward, determined that we were going to go through this.

* * *

~ **Canderous~**

I groaned as I woke up on a medlab bed. My head pounding as if I had drunken way too much ne'tra gal. Damn that astromech. If I ever got my hands on him, I'd rip out the combat level upgrades I had given him earlier after our skirmish on Kashyyyk. I struggled to get up to find myself staring into the eyes of an ithorian. Wonderful another annoying alien with a language other than Basic. He rumbled in his language.

"Forgive me for startling you...you were passed out. The selkath assumed you were drunk and were going to put you in a cell for disorderly conduct. I intervened and paid your fine. My name is Moza and on behalf of my leader Chodo Habat I welcome you to our compound in the Republic Embassy."

Ithorians. My people had debated on conquering the planet of Ithor but like Kashyyyk, my people had decided that burning continents was not worth our time to conquer a vast planet of forests.

"Why bother with me, Moza. I am a Mandalorian. I've killed many people, and probably some of yours as well."

The ithorian answered, "You were in need, Mandalorian. It is not the way of our herd to leave an injured or harmed sentient. When other sentients saw what happened they all fled and as I said earlier the selkath assumed you were drunk when they arrived. When I contacted our herd leader, he said we should help you."

I rolled my eyes, ithorians were an odd bunch. I tried to rise from the bed and nearly fell over. Moza interjected. "Take it easy...your limbs are weak...from what happened."

"Yea, I got taken down by a fracking astromech."

"Droids are...unusual."

"Heh...not too unusual, this one needs a memory wipe. And I'll do it the next time I find it, despite what the others say."

"Violence...do not spread your warrior's ways among us Mandalorian. Our herd is peaceful."

"Maybe it would have been better if I ended up with the selkath. Pacifism generally sickens me."

I managed to stand up this time, and Moza said, "It is good to see your strength return. Our herd is preparing a celebratory feast. You are welcome to join us. It is a bit short notice but...there is a wedding, and Chodo Habat insists we give our best to the bride and groom."

I raised an eyebrow wondering who was getting married. It couldn't be...could it? "Wedding? Who's getting married?"

"I do not recollect their names but the man said that the ambassador will not marry them and he implored our priest and herd leader to marry them. Chodo Habat felt sorry for them and so agreed to marry them."

"So what are ithorian weddings like?"

Moza reflected for a brief moment then stated, "Our priest counsels with the couple and the marriage ceremony is then finished with the herd. What goes on between the couple is unknown among the rest of the herd. Privacy is rare among an ithorian herd so these moments between our priest and a couple is very special. Then we enjoy a feast with the couple and celebrate their marriage."

"Hmm sounds a bit like the marriage I've seen on Kashyyyk."

Moza managed a chortle. "Most marriage customs I've studied do have some common ground. Come let us join the herd and wait for the couple."

My eyes went wide as I entered the room and saw Jolee, Juhani and Zaalbar. Damn it! There was no question in my mind whose wedding this was. I glared angrily at all three of them. I glared at Moza. "Where is this Chodo Habat?"

"He is with the couple...it is not permitted to disturb the ceremony, Mandalorian!"

"Well, I am disturbing it…"

Jolee folded up his arms. "Now hold off Canderous. This is **not** your affair, if Phoenix and Carth want to make fools of themselves then that's their affair, not yours."

"But...she's...mixed up inside and she knows it too."

Jolee laughed. "Canderous, that's practically all sentients in the galaxy. That's no reason to deny someone the chance to get marry. Besides one has to be just a little bit crazy to get married in the first place."

I glared at the old man. "Damn it that's not what I meant…"

He pushed me aside from the others and said quietly, "Look, this marriage may or may not take place but if you go into the priest's chambers and do something stupid." He paused. "Well, you know how stubborn Phoenix is, you go in say she can't...then she's like to say 'frack you' and marry Carth anyway."

I frowned, what did he mean the marriage might not take place? Did Akume have doubts? Yet here they were and it certainly looked like she was going to get married. But it seemed that the Old Jedi knew something. "I don't like this, Old Man. She shouldn't marry him, and you know it."

Jolee shrugged. "Perhaps. But she loves him. Have you ever been in love, Mandalorian?"

I chuckled. "Yeah...with three different women. Two of them tried to kill me. I insulted their honor or their family's honor. The last one...well, we met in battle. Her clan and ours were at war with each other. I defeated her and the next thing I knew...hell…love is a crazy thing. The next thing I knew...she and I were like two wild kath hounds in heat and we ended up being husband and wife. It didn't exactly go well between our two clans but...hell with it..." I paused."Alright, Old Man, I have my doubts but we'll try your way for a while."

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

My head was bowed as the ithorian spoke with me alone in his private chambers first. The custom was first to speak to Carth and then to me . I could feel the Force within him. He was apparently the priest of his people. He gave a long out sigh and then spoke in his language.

"You intrigue me, Jedi."

"I intrigue you? Why?"

The ithorian paused as he seemed to be scrutinizing me and then said, "Your spirit, your essence is split in two. You are fragmented and wounded. I feel it deep within you. You carry..."He paused, "I can't...this part of you…seems to keep me from reading you fully. You are bathed in blood, and the deaths of many are upon you. So much violence rumbles within you that it keeps me from reading you fully."

I knew that Chodo spoke of my possession of me by Revan. It was the second soul and spirit I had within me. Somehow Chodo could sense Revan.

"I..." I paused. "I would prefer not to talk about this...to anyone."

The ithorian looked thoughtfully at me and stated. "It is unwise to hide this from others, child. Your split spirit will emerge from you."

I glared at the ithorian, I felt frustration and I heard laughter in my ears, the dark laugh of Revan. Her laugh combined with my voice and I felt her power with mine and I folded up my arms in anger, "Can you stop it?"

The ithorian said nothing. He looked at me sadly and shook his head as best as he could in the negative.

"No. You can't can you. There is no cure... even in the Force. If you can't heal me, then keep your filthy mouth shut ithorian."

The ithorian eyes flashed alarm. He was afraid of me.

 _There is power in the fear of others, Phoenix. Let the anger flow through you. Show this filthy ithorian,_ _Phoenix...show them who you are. Who you truly are!_

My hand raised, and I felt the Force flow through me. The ithoran began to cough and sputter and I heard him gasping."Please…don't hurt me…."

"Then keep your mouth shut." I let go of his throat.

Chodo Habat shivered. "I have said too much...do as you wish, Jedi. I only spoke words of warning for your benefit."

"I know who I am…ithorian. Speaking what I already know...does not benefit me at all."

I paused in thought...wait a minute...this was a priest...and I could have killed him. I looked down at my hands almost expecting to see blood on my hands. Fracking hell...this could have been Carth. I sunk down on my knees and started crying. "Please…don't say anything to Carth…please…please don't."

How could I marry him when what the ithorian had said was true? I sobbed. "I...don't think I can go through with this marriage, Chodo."

The ithorian nodded. "I will keep your confidence, Jedi. But what about your intended? He seemed very insistent you two marry."

"I honestly don't know. I love Carth...but..."

"He quiets your soul, Jedi. You are not complete without him. I've seen you two together. He keeps you centered and balanced."

I took a breath and dried my eyes."That's not saying much...Chodo. You're right…I carry another soul within me. I am cursed...there is no cure."

Chodo stated,"You should tell your lover, Jedi."

"What! If I told him...no...he wouldn't understand. He'd be mortified. He'd shun me...I am sure of it, and I'll lose him."

My head sunk. "Frack...I am going to lose him anyway. And no matter how hard I try to get ready to tell him what the issue is...he doesn't want to listen."

Chodo sighed and spoke, "Then there is only one way to end this, Jedi. I will finish the ceremony in the company of the herd. You will say you can't marry him and that you will tell him your reasons in private."

I sighed."I am sorry…Chodo...to cause your herd this much trouble. I want to marry him…but I can't. I see that now."

"You are too hard on yourself, Jedi."

"And I almost killed you. To be fair, I have to be hard on myself because if I wasn't, you would be dead, Chodo Habat."

Damn you, Revan…you have ruined my life. Her laughter peeled through my ears.

 _You ruined it yourself, Phoenix. You and your lies. You are Sith...Phoenix. If you aren't Sith now, you will be._

I will never be a Sith, Revan. Never.

Revan's laughter peeled through my head. Frack….I wished she'd stop.

Just leave me alone….Revan. Please just leave me alone.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I arrived at the Republic Embassy nearly out of breath. Where the hell was Revan? I looked around the embassy. I turned to the ambassador's office begging to be let in to see the ambassador. Hoping by the Force that Revan and Carth weren't married. A protocol droid refused to let me in to see the ambassador stating that the ambassador was done seeing people for the day.

Yet staying put and glaring menacingly at the droid for over an hour and I remained firm and I demanded to see the ambassador. The droid finally relented and I was shown into his office.

The ambassador seemed ambivalent and I felt it in his speech as he stated, "More Jedi…has Manaan become a Jedi enclave now?!"

"I am looking for my partner...she would have been here earlier. She has dark hair and..."

"Oh, that one..."

The ambassador glared at me. "She's nothing more than a harlot taking our soldiers away from their duty."

I could sense the animosity in the ambassador. However, judging by his anger, it was clear that he had not married Revan and Carth. I was relieved but where were they? "I am here to stop the wedding between Jedi Padawan Phoenix Star and Captain Carth Onasi, Ambassador Wann. Perhaps...we could work together if you do not approve of it..."

The ambassador suddenly laughed. "Why should I trust you? You're a Jedi...and...how do I know you did not put your partner up to this?"

I looked intently at the ambassador and implored, "My partner is confused, ambassador. Although few mention it.."

I sighed and mulled over my response and tried to be truthful as I could be as to why I wanted the marriage not to go through. Truthful without reveling the truth of whom Phoenix actually was. "Ambassador, to be bluntly honest, Phoenix Star was injured in our Jedi Civil War. Surely you know how war leaves scars on people. But my partner, she may seem okay, but she is confused due to her injuries. I know she seems normal to you, but this is due to the treatment she has received for her injuries. I cannot let this marriage take place for that very reason. Her affection to the captain is misplaced. It is an after effect of her injury. It appears you and I don't wish the Captain or her to be married. You for reasons of the Republic and I for reasons of the Order. A Jedi cannot be married, and Phoenix defies and flaunts our rules. She cannot be expelled or put on leave from the Order as much as I would like it. She is needed for our war effort. She carries invaluable information of great importance to the Order and to the Republic. Our mission is of such great importance I cannot let this marriage take place."

The ambassador's eyebrow hitched upward as if something I had said had finally made sense to him. He scratched his beard. "I see… but I promised the captain I would not interfere in his life or his marriage to his Jedi harlot."

I cringed, I did not appreciate the ambassador calling Phoenix a harlot. She did not deserve such a title.

"But our mission is clear Ambassador Wann. My partner, Phoenix and I are on a mission of grave importance, even to the very future of the Republic and the Jedi Order. Such a marriage would be detrimental to both the Republic and the Order. Surely you can see the wisdom as to why Carth Onasi and Phoenix Star should not be married."

The ambassador nodded. "Your words do make a good deal of sense, Jedi…"

"Bastila Shan."

"Oh...so **you're** Bastila Shan. The Hope of the Republic, I believe that's what the news reports have titled you.

I blushed, I had not heard what the news had called me. As a Jedi, I was not supposed to listen to such stories as all my masters believed I would develop an inflated sense of pride of myself. However, I did feel proud that was what the Republic thought of me.

The ambassador snorted and seemed to knock the wind out of my sails when he stated, "Course I don't put much stock in sensationalized news reports. I remember when they called Revan the Hope of the Republic as well. Some hope...he turned out to be."

As the conversation turned to Revan, my heart began to beat heavily in my chest. Oh Force, if the ambassador only knew who he had been speaking to earlier. This marriage couldn't go through, it just couldn't. "Please, Ambassador, tell me where my partner is...I beg of you. If you care about the Republic as I care about it then you will tell me where she is."

"You are on your own, Jedi Shan. But I will tell you where she is along with Captain Onasi but I want no part of whatever you plan on doing. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Ambassador Wann. Thank you, Ambassador Wann."

"She is with a group...a herd of ithorians here in the embassy. They won't be here for too long as they are leaving for Telos soon. But...I sent Captain Onasi to the ithorians, as they have a priest in their herd. This priest intends to marry them. You will find the ithorians on the north part of our embassy."

I bowed before the ambassador and said to him. "Thank you, Ambassador Wann, your assistance no matter how small has been beneficial."

The ambassador nodded and said, "And thank you, Padawan Shan. You have enlightened me to quite a few things."

* * *

 **~Carth~**

My conversation with Chodo Habat was brief and uneventful. I wasn't exactly happy I had to go to an ithorian priest to get married. Chodo was kind, though, and he had talked to me first before he talked to Phoenix. He gave me words of wisdom on how to treat one's herdmate, how to grow things to please ones herdmate. I tried not to laugh because most of the words sounded like what an ithorian would do for their mate.

He spent a good deal of time with Phoenix, and I wondered what words of wisdom he was imparting to her. I worried about Phoenix, though. She seemed on edge, pensive, defensive and even distant at times. What was bothering her? I loved her, wasn't that enough? However, this mission was starting to wear on her. I could see it. I was afraid I was going to lose her somehow to some inner darkness that was brewing within her. She showed so much courage, despite the Sith and the evils of the galaxy around her. I had sworn I would protect her, and I knew she needed me. She came out of the chamber room a solemn look on her face.

She held my hand but her eyes were distant, far away as if she was thinking about something else. I smiled softly and kissed her on the cheek. She gasped in shock and I rubbed her hand. "You're too tense, gorgeous."

She sighed and gave me a wane smile. "Sorry..." she muttered quietly.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

I was about to speak to Carth but Chodo Habat gently spoke before I had a chance to say something. His speech was slow and deliberate.

"I have talked to the couple and have found them worthy of marriage. The forests of Ithor will bless this union. Yet with all unions, there are always difficulties and those who oppose such unions. I ask the herd if anyone opposes this union of souls?"

I looked around me. My friends were close by Jolee looked at me with the kind eyes of an old man. He had a quiet strength about him that I felt draped upon me like a quiet blanket of inner calm. He encouraged me to talk to Carth, to tell him the truth. Yet, I feared telling him the truth. I feared Carth would abandon me. I don't think Carth realized how much I depended on him. I latched onto him like a needy child. He was warm, good, kind and everything that settled the storm that I felt rage around me. I needed his love and his strength...without his influence in my life...I knew I would spiral out into darkness and despair.

Juhani looked at me a smile on her face. I was glad she was here even though I had sent her and Jolee on a mission to keep them busy. She who said I reminded her of the Jedi who had saved her from slavery. She whined about the Dark Side but had no idea how I felt or how I struggled. She had a resolve that I am sure she realized she didn't know she had. Perhaps one of these days the kitten Juhani would become a tiger. She would be a strong warrior and champion of the light. I wish I had her strength. I was crumbling, and she was blind to it.

Zaalbar stood and growled out a threat against any ithorian that dare oppose Carth and our marriage. He had no idea that I would be the one to say something. I should have insisted he stay home with his mate. Yet he was here on a quest that I was sure would claim all of our lives.

My eyes strayed on Canderous who gave me a harsh glare, he looked ready to say something against our marriage and I wondered how Zaalbar would react. Would he rip off Canderous' arms? After all, it was a wonder he didn't do that against the ambassador. Yet, to my surprise Canderous was quiet.

I began to open my mouth. "Carth I…am sorry….but we..."

A very familiar voice suddenly bellowed forth into the room. "This marriage cannot continue…"

I turned my head to see Bastila enter the room. I glared at her and she bowed her head. "The Jedi Order expressly forbids marriage. I act on behalf of the Council when I say this marriage cannot take place."

Jolee groaned and shook his head. "Damn it Bastila...why now?"

Bastila looked at Jolee. "Someone has to speak out against this, and that someone is me."

Chodo Habat spoke. "There is disharmony in the herd, and I cannot continue this marriage. Forgive me, Captain Carth Onasi and Jedi Padawan Phoenix Star. Go in peace..." He quickly withdrew and I sighed. I considered him lucky at least he could withdraw from what I knew was going to end up being a whopper of an argument.

Carth glared at Bastila. "You've interfered in our lives enough, Bastila. Your damn Order can go to hell…"

I smiled at Carth. He took the words straight out of my mouth. I grabbed Carth's hand and stated, "Damn it, Bastila. We're going to get married. Maybe, not today but we will get married. I will find a way to sever this damn Force bond, make no mistake on that. From now on: Don't you dare talk to me! Don't you even look at me! Our friendship and our sisterhood are over. You keep to your area on the Hawk, and I will keep to mine!"

"But Phoenix..."

I ignored her. "Did you hear something, Republic?"

He nodded. "No, I didn't hear anything either."

I looked at Carth and he looked at me, his hand grasped mine tighter and we bolted from the room. We had no idea where we were going, but I knew that it would probably end up with us in a hotel room here on Manaan. He said softly. "As far as I am concerned, Phoenix, you are Phoenix Onasi and you're my wife...it's just not a matter of public record...yet."

* * *

A/N: Sorry, this took so long to write. I blame TOR really I do. I got thick into the Sith Warrior storyline and...I got hooked into it. I normally hate MMO's but...I had incredible writer's block and when I am stuck a good RPG game suckers me in.

This chapter actually has a lot of influence from Ether's work regarding a relationship with Carth and Revan in general. I honestly think if a marriage did occur between Carth and Revan it would be a lot like Anakin and Padme's relationship and marriage. Since such a marriage would be deemed very controversial but would end up damaging Carth's reputation and career, obviously. Course Bastila has very bad timing and knowing Phoenix/Revan she is very stubborn and will obviously not say anything to Carth now because she's mad and angry at Bastila.

Then I've been busy studying for my Food Safety and Sanitation certification which I passed. Anyway. At 14k words, the chapter has been one of my longest chapters to date but I feel the wait and the enormous number of words made this chapter worthwhile.

Finally, I want to thank my loyal readers, followers, and reviewers. I write mainly for myself, but I enjoy the reviews and I enjoy hearing what people think.


	80. Chapter 79: Manaan: Aftermath

**Chapter 79: Manaan: Aftermath**

 **~Jolee~**

The ithorians quickly scattered leaving our group alone and choosing what I considered a very non-aggressive action that was typical of their species. I glared at Bastila; how could anyone be so thick to barge into a wedding, a wedding where Revan was going to back out of it in the first place. I heard the hesitation in Revan's voice, she was going to tell Carth that she couldn't marry him. Although she was a little late in following through, I had to give her credit that she was going to halt the marriage. Yet when Bastila stepped in, Revan being the headstrong and stubborn woman that she was knuckled down and stated she was going to get married.

I snorted at Bastila. "You just made things worse, Bastila. She wasn't going to get married."

"She looked like she was going to get married to me, Jolee."

I snorted. "Yea after you barged in and made a fool out of yourself. She was going to call it off and then you marched in being so self-righteous and full of arrogance to match. I thought that you were supposed to be bonded to her, Bastila? Couldn't you feel her hesitation? It was thick enough to cut with a knife. But she wasn't going to get married, isn't that right, Canderous?"

Canderous was quiet and seemed to be mulling things over. "I have to say, Old Man. The way…Phoenix was acting before her royal highness came strolling in... she was going to back out. You were right. And…" He turned his focus towards Bastila. "Plus, you didn't exactly stop them from consummating their love. Knowing those two they are probably in some dingy hotel room rooting around like two wild kath hounds. Denying them their marriage only made them..."Canderous sighed as it seemed realization began to dawn on him."...want to be together even more."

Bastila cringed, and I chuckled and said to Canderous, "Exactly, Mandalorian. And... does that bother you, Bastila?"

Bastila turned a shade of red. "I... uhh…Jedi are not allowed to love, Jolee. Whatever Phoenix is doing…physically with Carth... it will lead to her ruin."

I snorted. "Nonsense. Seriously, Jedi these days. Love doesn't lead to the Dark Side, Bastila. Passion can lead to rage and fear and can be controlled... but passion is not the same thing as love. And from what I've seen of Phoenix and Carth...that love...it will not condemn her... it will save her. But it doesn't need a nosy Padawan like you butting into it. You need to leave them alone."

Bastila looked at me and her shoulders slumped. She looked tired, alone, and possibly afraid. I felt sad for the poor child. She was all mixed up and I wondered if it was the bond that she had with Revan. Seeing how confused and unsettled Revan was, it left little doubt that both Jedi were equally confused and unsettled. Perhaps that made their bond even more clouded and made it hard for the two to sense each other properly. Regardless, I knew Bastila loved Revan as Rev...err Phoenix had told me she had had an affair with Bastila. Apparently, Revan was able to let go of whatever attachment she had but apparently, Bastila had been unable to disconnect her attachment to Revan.

I put a hand on Bastila's shoulder. "Look...I realize you have a connection with her but...you have to let her go. She has her own life to live."

Bastila nodded mutely and then wandered away saying nothing to me or those around us.

Juhani went after Bastila. Maybe the cathar would be able to connect on a level that I couldn't.

Canderous snorted. "She's lovesick… I've never thought I'd see that in the Jedi princess. And apparently, she has it bad for Phoenix. Seems like Phoenix doesn't share the same for her, though."

I sighed. "Ehh...hormones...plus that damn bond that they both have."

Zaalbar moaned. "I don't understand why Bastila interrupted the wedding in the first place. Phoenix Star obviously loves, Carth Onasi. Why can't she see that? I thought...the Jedi don't interfere in what people do. The Jedi Order is a strange creature that they don't allow its practitioners to love and be married."

I snorted. "Only with others; not with their own practitioners. It's a control issue, and they wonder why so many Jedi end up going off the deep end. They are so good at mucking up the works, Zaalbar. They wouldn't train my wife...and... I think they did that to spite me because I did marry her."

Zaalbar cocked his head but stated nothing regarding my statement.

Canderous laughed. "You really sincerely think that, Old Man?"

"Of course, I do. They can do stupid things, Mandalorian and then to make it worse they lie about it and say their personal feelings didn't gum up the works. I mean look at what's going on with Bastila. It's obvious she interrupted this wedding because her personal feelings got in the way."

Canderous shook his head. "And what about your own feelings, Old Man?"

I glared at the grizzled old warrior. "I may be a hypocrite, Mandalorian but at least I don't lie about it. I am one hundred percent true to myself and I am better for it."

I heard a clapping of hands and turned to find Jula Jax behind me. She laughed. "Jolee Bindo...the rebellious scoundrel of a Jedi padawan has returned."

I turned in shock, Jula…how did she manage to find out where we were?

She chuckled. "Hello, Bindo...are you planning on any other forms of rebellion in the Order other than your illicit marriage and tirades about how unfair the order is?"

I scowled as if Jula was much better. She had had a husband. Course the Jedi of my era had not been extremely strict on marriage as the Jedi of Revan's era. Yet, I was sure Jula didn't want to talk about her husband as much as I didn't want to talk about my own wife. I hadn't seen Jula in...well over twenty years or so. She wore the robes of a Jedi master. I snorted, Jula apparently had conformed herself to the Order. She looked well enough. Yet age and time had left its mark on the human woman. Her long hair was silvery gray. Although she looked relatively good for her age, aside for a few wrinkles and she had gained a little weight. She had become extremely matronly looking.

"If you two don't mind, I'd prefer to talk to Master Jax alone."

Canderous and Zaalbar nodded and left me and Jula alone.

* * *

 **~Bastila~**

I couldn't leave Revan...Phoenix alone. I feared I was responsible for all of this. I had had a forbidden relationship with her. I had been the one who had made Revan into Phoenix. I had a bond and a connection to Revan few could even comprehend. Not even Carth could fully understand that connection. And yet, it was apparent that Phoenix had rejected me, despite the bond. Why? By the Force, it made no sense! I thought...she loved me. She showed it when she tried saving my father. We shared so much and...as I walked away, the tears began to sting and burn my eyes.

Juhani came alongside me. "Bastila...about Phoenix. It is apparent she does not share your feelings."

"I don't wish to talk about it, Juhani."

Juhani frowned. "Perhaps not...but let me speak and you may listen. Remember what I told you on Tatooine?"

I shook my head negatively. Tatooine felt like ages ago.

"I mentioned there was a padawan...but we both entered the Order around the same time. However, he found the Jedi way was not for him. He found the Order to controlling, too limiting and so he left. However, he wanted me to go with him… he said…" She paused. "He said he loved me. Yet...I did not feel the same way. I admired him and respected him as a friend, but I had no feelings for him as he did for me. We parted in anger...he was angry I could not reciprocate his love. I wish…" She sighed." I wish I could have felt something for him...but I just did not feel the same way that he did for me. It is not easy to admit I may have hurt his progression in the Force. But I was young and naive and did not realize that the way I presented myself may have hurt him."

I glared at Juhani. "Are you saying I am hurting Phoenix with my behavior?"

Juhani shrugged. "That I cannot answer, Bastila. I only know that I ended up hurting Dak terribly through my actions and... perhaps I ended up hurting myself through my actions with him as well."

Was Juhani hinting my feelings for Revan were hurting me as well? No that...couldn't be true. Could it?

I was quiet and said nothing. I couldn't say anything, I felt hollow and numb inside. I said softly. "Leave me alone, Juhani. I... I feel sick inside."

Juhani nodded. "I understand..."

"No, you don't understand. No one understands. I have failed… I have failed the precepts of the Order and because of me...I may have doomed us all. Master Vrook was right, my mistakes with Phoenix have been compounded exponentially..."

Juhani shook her head. "Master Vrook..." she paused. "You're too hard on yourself, Bastila. Master Vrook only chastises students… he never praises them. You could have saved an entire fleet with your battle meditation, and Master Vrook would still find something wrong with it."

I paused, that was true. In fact, Vrook stated he thought I thought too highly of myself with my battle meditation. He never praised the fact that I had won a few battles for the Republic. I sighed..." I really don't feel like talking about this Juhani."

Juhani answered, "Alright...if you feel like you need to talk to someone about your feelings for Phoenix or anything else. I am available to talk to."

I gave a light smile, but I did not feel like talking to Juhani at all. She left, and I quietly began walking around Manaan looking for a place where I could reflect and have some degree of peace. What was I going to do? I felt so alone. Carth undoubtedly hated me as well as Phoen...Revan. Even if Phoenix...Revan did not reciprocate my feelings. She was the only person I felt close to as a friend. And now I had surely broken all that. I had isolated myself from everyone. I never did make friends easily even before this mess with Revan. There were masters and fellow padawans but there were no friendships. For even friendships meant attachments. Yet, Phoenix… Revan had managed to break something within me. A wall that I had built around myself one that held companionship or even friendship at bay, but Revan had broken it. As I found an observational deck that looked out across the ocean of Manaan. So peaceful and I quietly breathed the cleansing smell of salt. A Jedi must not show emotion, but this time...I could no longer suppress my emotions and tears came streaming down my eyes.

I sighed and whispered. "I am sorry...Revan. I love you...if you want to be with Carth then you shall have him. Yet...perhaps one day...you'll remember me and... love me as you did back on the Hawk."

I reflected on our moments together. I closed my eyes and…

 _My hands ran down Revan, she giggled and flexed as I tickled her naked body in the fresher. She nibbled on my ear and my body relaxed. My hands went the whole length of her body, and I found the secret places of her body._

 _"_ _Bastila…."_

 _She found mine as well, and we both groaned in absolute pleasure._

More tears went down my face. I didn't care if the Order thought such things were wrong. I wanted...a physical love...like Revan had for Carth. I wanted it...more than anything and now that was impossible. Impossible unless…

No, I couldn't. I had made a vow to the Order. I would not break my vow...I would not tell Phoenix who she was. Although I knew if I did...it would end Revan's affair with Carth. Carth would never want to be with Darth Revan. The very Sith Lord that had caused him so much pain in his personal life. And yet...I doubted that Revan would come running to me if I told her who she was. She'd probably rage and fume at me or worse…

I gave a long painful sigh. I was trapped and felt so very forsaken. To me it felt like the whole crew was against me, taking Phoenix...or Revan's side over mine. I sobbed heavily, I had not cried so hard since the day my mother and father left me with the Order.

* * *

 **~Dustil~**

I must have had a screw loose or something, but I quietly tailed the twi'lek and her astromech as they walked through the streets of Ahto City. Something nagged at me that I should follow her and see where she was going. She paused and acted as if somehow, she knew someone was following her. I had been using the Force to hide and somehow, she knew someone was following her. How? She seemed to be staring right at me, but I knew she hadn't seen me as she scratched her lekku and… continued. I shivered. How the hell could she do that? I was pretty sure she wasn't Force sensitive but then again, she did hang around Jedi...it's possible she might have developed some sort of sixth sense when it came to being around Force-sensitives. But that was a far-out theory... at any rate, she might not know who was tailing her.

The astromech beeped at her and she said. "I don't know...T3… I keep feeling like someone is behind us. My lekku keep twitching."

The droid beeped and the girl said, "Well, T3...it's hard to explain. But...it's a twi'lek thing, I...my lekku always twitch before a storm or something unusual..."

The droid beeped again, and the girl stated. "No, I don't have atmospheric sensors in my lekku. Don't be absurd. As I said, it's a twi'lek thing. There's nothing scientific about it, T3, seriously."

I frowned, maybe I needed to read up on twi'lek superstitions because somehow this girl was able to perceive something. Yet, there wasn't anything I could do about twi'lek and their strange habits with their lekku. I would have to keep that in mind the next time I tried to hide around a twi'lek.

The girl seemed to take a long walk and then stopped off at a food stall and bought some sort of fish wrapped up in a flatbread. She proceeded to munch away on it. My stomach growled in hunger. I should have gotten something to eat earlier and scowled. What possessed me to watch this damn twi'lek girl was beyond me. She drove me crazy earlier with her impertinent attitude. She stood up to me and refused to take any nonsense from me. She was either foolish, brave or perhaps a combination of both. This very insolent attitude was the only rationale I could come up with as to why I would even consider trailing her.

She walked into a docking bay and entered a ship. Damn it… of course, where did I think she was going? I could follow her into the ship, but there was a big risk that I might get caught. Yet, I wanted to know more about this twi'lek and her associates. I needed to know why she walked around with a big chip on her shoulder. She didn't seem to fear me, and I doubted any other Sith would have tolerated her insolence. It meant she had powerful Jedi around her, Jedi that she thought could protect her. I followed in her wake and used the Force to mask myself even more and more into the shadows.

The ship was unusual. I had thought a ship that had a bunch of Jedi on it would be more of a passenger ship. This ship instead looked more like a dirty old smuggler's ship. Yet, Master Uthar had told me not to let appearances deceive me. There was more to this ship than it seemed considering there were Jedi on it.

I looked at the ship's security system to see if I could find a way onto the ship. It was locked down tightly after the twi'lek and her astromech boarded. I had to admit I wasn't much of a slicer. Maybe this wasn't worth my time after all. The security system barked out in a rather impertinent tone that sounded oddly like the twi'lek.

"Warning...input the wrong code again, jerk and you're gonna get it!"

I frowned as I took out some security spikes and set to work on getting past this annoying security measure. The door opened…hmm, this seemed too easy.

* * *

 **~Mission~**

T3 and I entered the Hawk and shut the door behind us. I activated the security that I had in place after our issues with Czerka on Kashyyyk. Nix had been so proud of my efforts, and I was happy to help her keeping our ship safe.

I went into the back of the ship with T3. We planned on showing that disgusting gamorrean Hukta Jax that the "Mysterious Stranger" wasn't someone to mess with. T3 pulled up holos with Nix. He proceeded to alter the holos, and I shivered. "Umm...T3...Nix looks like a Sith in those dark robes and her face hidden under a cowl."

T3 beeped in response :: You want to scare the gamorrean, don't you? ::

"Yea...I guess...but that's kinda creepy and with her black hair and dark eyes underneath that cowl she's wearing... I am not sure if... Nix would like it."

T3 beeped. :: It will give us an advantage in dealing with the gamorrean.::

I sighed. "I suppose...so…but I don't think we should let Nix know about it. I think...I think it would upset her...a lot."

T3 beeped in agreement. I looked at the holo-image of Nix and scratched my lekku."You know something looks oddly similar about Nix...like some sort of actor in a holofilm or something."

I sighed and looked at the hooded and cloaked figure of Nix and tried to figure out where I had seen such a figure in my past. Jedi were often hooded and cloaked. There were lots on Taris when I had been younger before they went off to fight the Mandalorians.

"Nah…it's probably my imagination running wild."

T3 beeped out an inquiry. :: Mission you were on Taris before I was activated. During the Mandalorian Wars...did you meet any Jedi? Did you ever see, Revan or Malak?::

I sighed. "Yea...I did...some young padawan. He wasn't with Revan, though. He was in a lot of trouble I think he was accused of a crime he didn't commit, at least that's what he said. As for Revan or Malak...I heard Revan once. He was speaking in front of a crowd of Tarisians. He said he had freed us from the Mandalorians and our corrupt government. He vowed we would never be oppressed by Mandalorians or the Exchange ever again. But...that was a long time ago T3. I guess Revan lost sight of who he was. Or maybe his position of authority went to his head. I don't know...and then there were rumors that Revan wasn't a guy but a woman."

T3 beeped :: What if those rumors were true? ::

"I don't know...it's not like Revan showed anyone who they were. I guess…it is possible a lot of people wanted Revan to be a woman. I mean...many of us twi'leks wanted Revan to be a twi'lek…I mean… there's something appealing to the fact that Revan could be one of my people or a gal. So, I guess that's how those rumors got started. Anyway...we need to pick a voice for Nix and Nix's voice isn't menacing enough to frighten a gamorrean. What do you suggest?"

T3 beeped. "A voder usually does the trick for most sentients to make someone menacing. It worked for Revan and Malak."

"I guess. If you can alter Nix's voice, then that would be best."

T3 beeped. :: What do you want Phoenix to say? ::

I looked skyward in thought. "Hmm...what would sound like Nix? I mean, if she was going to challenge the gamorrean? Hmm...something like I am the Mysterious Stranger...I challenge you."

:: But who is going to race this gamorrean, you or Phoenix? ::

I sighed. "That's a good point. I mean Nix is busy as it is. I don't think she'd have the time to race this swine, to begin with. I wish Canderous didn't run off...he could have helped us."

T3 began to program the hologram. Nix's voice went deep and throaty with a voder placed in. It was chilling and my lekku twitched. "Greetings...Hukta Jax, I am the Mysterious Stranger, The swoop race champion of Taris. I dare you to challenge me or one of my associates to a swoop race. I present to you Mission Vao; she is my protege and a fierce racer. She will beat you...and if you do beat her...I will personally race you myself."

"Wait a minute...I still don't like the idea of bringing Nix into..."

Cautionary Statement: Adolescent twi'lek we have a prisoner…

I turned around to find HK-47 in the room. He dumped the Sith Kid on the floor by me. He was groaning, and his hair stood on end. He looked as though he had been electrocuted or something.

"Woah… how the heck? And I thought you killed sentients. And he's a Sith...I mean...he couldn't have been easy to…"

Annoyed Statement: The master won't let me kill anyone, adolescent twi'lek. You know that and as for this Sith...he is a child, an amateur… taking him down was easy. And although electrocution works well against Jedi, I did not use a lethal voltage."

I frowned. "Wait a minute; you know how to kill Jedi? I don't think Nix would like that."

Statement: Some of my memories were restored when the master slammed me into a tree on Kashyyyk. One of my owners was a Mandalorian...I suspect I learned my Jedi killing techniques from him. Although...that is hard to say… I have no memory of who my original owner was...I have had several, including a hutt. So, trying to figure out where my techniques came from is hard to say.

The Sith kid still looked a bit incoherent, but he had a menacing glare at HK. "Umm, what should we do with him?"

Advisement: While I doubt the master would approve. I would kill him before he decides to kill you and the others.

T3 beeped. :: We should wait for Phoenix and the others to decide what to do with him."

The Sith kid managed to stand he was wobbling all over the place. He managed a glare at my hologram and suddenly laughed. "Is this that Nix you're talking about? She doesn't look like much of a Jedi to me. She looks more like one of my masters at the Sith Academy."

T3's shock arm came out and shocked him, the Sith kid groaned and I nodded my approval. "Thanks...T3 and no one asked for your opinion, Sith. And what the hell are you doing here?"

He gave a surly glare at HK and me but said nothing. Part me felt like telling HK to make him say something. Yet I kinda knew that would have involved torturing him. I didn't have the stomach to do that, and the Sith kid would have mocked me for being a hypocrite.

I sighed. "We let the others decide what to do with him. Until then we lock him up somewhere."

HK stated. Cautionary: Even though the amateur Sith put up a struggle against me, keeping him alive is a danger. We should kill him before he becomes a threat.

T3 beeped out :: Phoenix would be angry if we even considered doing that. Do you really want to cross her, Murder Bot? ::

Indigent Statement: No one asked for your opinion, Garbage Can!

HK was right but then again so was T3. "What about sedating him? Would that work?"

The Sith kid suddenly laughed. "Sedate me…are you kidding me?"

I glared at him. His attitude was seriously ticking me off. "That's it. Pump him full of sedatives till he drops. I know Nix was sedated by Calo Nord. I am pretty sure there is something out there that would keep him out of our hair till the others get…"

* * *

 **~Dustil~**

"Look here…twi'lek…you honestly think there is a sedative that could handle me!"

I hadn't expected to be caught off guard by a damn assassin droid. And what Jedi owned an assassin droid? The damn droid had apparently been tied into the security system I had circumvented. Well, the twi'lek had said I was going to get it. I didn't realize that meant dealing with a demented droid that nearly killed me by pumping electricity into me and swiping my weapons. I still felt like a buzzed nerf and my head felt muddled. I had troubles concentrating and checked to see if I didn't have some sort of neural Force collar around my neck. Nope, but that voltage had apparently disrupted my use of the Force. There was also the fact that If I hadn't been Force-sensitive; I think I would have been killed.

The twi'lek girl glared at me. "Listen here, Sith. You're giving me very few reasons as to why we should keep you alive. Nix has killed Dark Jedi and she's going to kill Malak. She may not want to kill you, but that doesn't mean she can't. So, either you accept being sedated or I'll have HK kill you and will tell Nix that you attacked us. I don't think she'll question too much because you invaded our ship uninvited. And you said it yourself earlier…we are enemies."

I wondered if the twi'lek had the guts to follow through. "You're no Sith, twi'lek. I doubt you could kill me let alone tell your Jedi friends that you killed an unarmed man."

The twi'lek glared at me. "Don't push your luck, Sith!"

The astromech rolled forward and I screamed as jolts of electricity flowed through me. The twi'lek only grinned and then said. "Thanks…T3!"

The next thing I knew the assassin droid joined in and I groaned…maybe the twi'lek had the guts after all and everything went dark…

* * *

 **~Mission~**

"Stop it…T3 and HK!"

T3 automatically stopped but HK stopped and responded. Confused Query: But I thought you wished the Amateur Sith to be killed?

I said. "No…I don't! I want him alive…just incapacitated."

Frustrated Statement: You just as annoying as the master, adolescent twi'lek.

I looked at the Sith kid and checked to make sure he had a pulse, I sighed with relief to find he was alive. I now wondered what to do with the kid. "There has to be a way to install…an energy shield or something."

T3 beeped :: The Republic Embassy presumably has that technology. ::

"Yea…but how I am going to explain to them how I got a Sith in the first place?"

I had to think quickly. I had planned on sedating him and we had a medlab and medical supplies. "We keep him constantly sedated. That's the only idea I have. I don't like it and I doubt the others are going to like it but…it's the only idea I have right now. HK…if he even stirs…you keep him unconscious. I am going to have to go out and find something stronger to sedate him with…I mean Manaan has kolto it probably has other medical things."

T3 beeped :: I'll help, Mission. ::

I smiled. "Thanks, T3."

I turned toward HK. "Stay with him. Keep him sedated and unconscious. Don't and I mean it HK…don't kill him. Follow what Nix has told you."

HK responded in what I knew was a testy retort. Irritated Query: Do you think I would disobey my master?

"No. But…I know you HK and without Nix being here you're likely to do something you're not supposed to do."

HK heaved a sigh. Statement: You're as hard a taskmaster as my master is adolescent twi'lek.

I flashed a slight grin. "Thanks, I think. Anyway, let's go T3 and see if we can grab some sedative and see if we can find the others or something."

* * *

 **~Jula Jax~**

I managed a light chuckle at Jolee, we had grown up together in the Order both as padawans. We both had been through a lot with the war with Exar Kun. I had lost my husband, and he had lost his wife.

For a few moments, we only stared at each other not sure what to say. Finally, Jolee spoke. "Well, Jula are you going to speak or are you going to attract flies from your gob."

I laughed again. "You haven't changed one-bit Jolee Bindo. Ever brash and always irreverent."

Jolee snorted. "And you've changed a lot…Master Jax is it? Tell me, Jula was it worth selling yourself out to the Order after what happened with your husband Sydo Jax."

I glared angrily at Jolee. "Sydo is dead, I needed the Order in my life after all that. You abandoned the Order because you were selfish."

"Selfish… selfish! What was selfish was the fact that the Order wouldn't allow Nayama to be trained? Wouldn't let justice take its course after I spared her when she turned to the Dark Side and was willing to hide my failings after she killed so many. I should have been found guilty and handed over to the Republic for punishment."

I sighed. "You were wounded inside. The Order knew that. Compassion is a Jedi's trait. I believed in it then and I believe in it now. It's why…Revan was…"I paused."I wished there was something else I could have done for…her, but at the time it felt like the best course of action. And yes, my skills were used on Revan. We believed…we felt that it would redeem her."

Jolee shook his head. "That woman is so mixed up inside. She may think she's someone else but…it's like she's staring at a painting with an almost indiscernible flaw in it. She can't put her finger on it…but I am pretty sure she knows something is wrong." Jolee sighed and then stated, "You've got her so…messed up…and what you did wasn't redemption. You don't force redemption on someone."

"And what would you suggest, Jolee? She was injured…her mind was a mess…she couldn't exactly make that choice whether she wanted it or not."

"So, your justification is that she was injured, and she couldn't make that choice. You're asking for trouble…Jula. I just hope…well…if Phoenix finds out…I just hope she's a lot more merciful than…well than who she was."

"Then we will leave it to the Force to make that decision…Jolee. But enough about, Revan and the past. I don't want to talk about it. Do you?"

He gave me a hard glance and then said. "I still feel like you sold yourself out to the Order, "Master" Jax."

"Jolee…please understand I always believed in the Order. I felt I could change what I felt was wrong more than you did running away from it. By leaving the Order and denying your rank of Jedi Knight, did you really accomplish anything?"

* * *

 **~Jolee~**

"I made a personal statement…Jula. A statement to the Order that they were wrong. It was enough to let those stodgy old Masters know that compassion isn't always wanted or needed. They needed to be firm, and they needed to punish me. I was responsible for Nayama. I trained her. I disobeyed the Order. I didn't kill her when I should have, and her actions afterward indirectly came from me."

Jula shook her head. "And let's say for argument's sake that you did obey the will of the council and didn't train Nayama. Do you believe she wouldn't have joined Exar Kun and Ulic? The Mandalorians joined up with Ulic and they weren't Jedi."

"I don't feel like playing these "what-if-I-didn't" games, Jula."

She glared at me. "Damn it Bindo…you need to hear it from someone."

I suddenly grinned, there was something of the Old Jula that I didn't think still existed. A woman that was independent and not fully indoctrinated or perhaps beaten down by the tenets of the Order.

She continued. "The point is you knew Nayama and you knew her nature. She would more than likely have been drawn to Exar, Jedi training or not. You couldn't kill her…and if you did…you would have lost a part of yourself in the process. You showed compassion to her…you acted like a Jedi. It was something I am sure the Council took into consideration when you were on trial and whether you deserved to be a Jedi."

"But I deserved to be punished…I didn't deserve to be a Jedi, not after everything I did…"

"You did nothing wrong…Jolee!"

I shook my head. "I disobeyed the council! I allowed Nayama's corruption and evil to continue. I deserved to be exiled, cast out or even worse."

Jula sighed and looked at me with a sad look. "I see. I can't argue with you, Jolee…but you loved her. How can you kill someone you love? Love is the most potent emotion there is…and this is where I disagree with the Order. Love is not a bad and evil thing. I loved my husband. I would have done anything to save him…but he struck at our master and... I couldn't stand by and watch him kill our master." Jula paused."I don't want to talk about it either, Jolee...and there is a pain in my heart that can never fully heal. Perhaps I did what I did to Revan because of what happened with my husband. If I could have done something to keep him from falling to the Dark Side or if there was a chance to return him to what he was…" She paused once more and then continued. "If you had a chance to reclaim a person and make them into what they were before…would you not take it?"

I sighed. If Nayama had been injured and had her memory robbed from her… would I take the opportunity for her to be redeemed? The idea was tempting. But I shook my head, "But it would have taken the woman I knew. And Revan isn't Nayama nor is she, Sydo, either."

Jula nodded and said softly. "I realize that now…and I am ashamed of the actions we…I the Order have done to Revan. Yet…"

I looked at Jula. "You really ought to tell Phoenix who she is…"

Jula's eyes went wide with fear. "And then what…I don't know, but I feel she would be angry and…"

I rolled my eyes. "Damn straight she's going to be angry. I'd be angry if everything I felt and knew, was true, was a lie. It's going to be harder and harder for her not to be angry with any of the Order the more time passes and you don't say anything. But I see you're going to take Bastila's side on this and…to think...you're a Jedi Master. Fine…continue this hypocrisy. But leave me out of it! It's not my place to say anything to her. I am not a Jedi, and it's not my responsibility to tell her."

"But she seems happier in ignorance…"

"Damn it Jula…stop compounding an error. She loves a certain Republic soldier…what's he going to say when he finds out that his lover was…is a Sith Lord?"

"She has a chance at being happy…Jolee. A happiness that we both never had from our loves."

I shook my head. "I give up. Have fun being a god…Master Jax. And you wonder why I left the Order."

I turned to leave. I felt disgusted, how could Jula be so close to admitting an error but afraid of rectifying it?

But Jula grabbed my hand before I could take a step away from her. "Please…Jolee...don't leave me."

Her eyes softened and I looked at her, those eyes…damn it. Soft brown and sincere. I saw the young Jedi padawan that I had grown up with. Perhaps if I had not met Nayama…and Jula hadn't had her eyes set on Sydo at the time.

I sighed and her hand closed around mine and she spoke, "I thought our reunion wouldn't be filled with so much contention, Jolee. We both were friends…before…our worlds fell apart. I…"

I mulled over her words. "Friendship…perhaps. I am unsure if there can be anything else between us, Jula. I still…feel pain… over Nayama."

She nodded. "I understand…I feel the same about Sydo. But it has been twenty years…and perhaps it is time…that we both started healing…together. If that's even possible."

Damn it. Jula could be just as persistent as Revan. "Fine…but I am not coming back to the Order, Jula!"

She suddenly laughed. "No one is asking you to come back! The Order is not for everyone. But that doesn't mean we can't be friends."

"True...but…"

I heard beeping and Mission and T3 came running forward through the near quiet and deserted main room of the ithorian compound. "Jolee…thank goodness I found you. I had a hard time finding you, but everyone in the Republic embassy said I could find a group of Jedi here, but we have some problems."

"Problems?"

Jula let go of my hand and I looked at the young adolescent twi'lek. "What sort of problems?"

"A Sith tried getting on the Hawk."

"Great…that's all we need…but what do you mean by tried?"

"HK has them incapacitated…for now…but this is way over my head, Jolee. I need your help. Nix isn't responding to her comm. I am scared to comm Canderous…ummm…well, T3 and I may have angered him. And I don't know what to do with this...guy. If I let him go…he'll just go running after his masters or something and bring them back to harm us. I don't think we need that much attention from the Sith."

I ran my fingers through my light beard and mustache. "Hmm…I suppose we should look over this Sith and see if we can do something about him."

* * *

A/N: Wow…it took me quite some time to write this chapter. Part of it was writer's block…and then another part of me got lost in the lore of playing SWTOR. lol, I completed the class story for Sith Warrior and now playing the story of Jedi Consular. Then my laptop decided to go the way of the dinosaur…the charging port broke and I mulled over getting a new laptop or a used one. I got a new one a few weeks ago. Thanks to Black Friday…I have a sparkly new laptop that runs Windows 10 and I bought a copy of Office for it as well. MS Office is soooo much better than Libre or Open Office. I had planned on more for this chapter and I had portions with Carth and Phoenix in this chapter; but then decided to split it and move it to another chapter. I realized I was going to have issues with the context of time. I had also mulled over whether to do more with Jolee meeting up with Dustil in this chapter. decided that if I did attention might start to wane. My attention to the chapter was starting to wane, by the way, and I really wanted to get this update out.

This chapter has also been delayed because I have been busy with a new job I am in and then I got sick last week…and then got injured at work this week and so decided to catch up on this chapter while I heal up and get over being sick and injured and figure out where the heck, I was going with it. Anyway, thanks to everyone that has reviewed and see you next chapter.


	81. Chapter 80: Manaan: Minds at Work

**Chapter 80: Manaan: Minds at Work**

 **~Phoenix~**

I groaned as I woke up, Carth next to me in bed. He smiled gently. "Hey...gorgeous…so...Mrs. Onasi what's do you want to do now?"

I sighed. "It's fine and good calling me your wife, Carth but...it still doesn't change the fact..."

Carth nodded. "I know, love...I know...but for once can't we just pretend that Bastila didn't interfere and...we're a newly wedded couple."

I shook my head. "I am still Phoenix Star… or Akume...to Canderous. I want to pretend what happened with Bastila was some horrible bad dream, Republic and... like you say...we are married but...we're not. I... well, I don't do well trying to deny reality. I am sorry… really, I am. And a few hours ago...well..." I lightly fingered the sheets on the bed we had been sharing in the Manaan hotel room on the second floor. "I loved being Phoenix Onasi... but…" I paused. "It's like waking up from a dream and knowing otherwise."

Carth embraced me, the skin of our bodies touching, and he stroked my hair. "I know...but let me treat you like….my wife. Just a little longer let's deny reality and say you're my wife and that you are Phoenix Onasi. Which means… room service..." He reached around and started rubbing and massaging my feet which made me flinch because I was ticklish. Carth chuckled. "I forgot...you're ticklish."

"Carth...I don't mind pampering but...we're on a mission for the Republic!"

Carth nodded. "I know...but...damn it, Phoenix. You're being sent on a suicide mission."

"Which one, Republic? The one where I am being sent into the Sith Embassy or the one where I go after Malak?! This is a bad time to forget reality, Carth. I mean it's tempting so very tempting to kick back and relax but...you're a Captain and I am a Jedi. If you survive, after all, this...you'll more than likely be promoted. If...well, if I survive... I am leaving the Order. I don't care...what the Jedi Masters say...I've tried really hard to be a Jedi. But Canderous is right in many respects. I don't have the constitution to be one…." I paused. "I don't know what I was thinking back on Taris about being a Jedi…it's just not working for me. I love you for one and let my emotions drive me. Plus, my thoughts on the Force...well...I am just not..." I paused. "A Jedi is supposed to be calm and reflective and me...my mind is chaotic...I don't have peace within me. I am supposed to be at peace and…" I bowed my head. "I don't. Maybe someday I will but I don't. I don't know what's wrong with me Carth...I feel...it's hard to explain but..."

I paused. How much could I tell Carth about my possession and not have him get upset? I was pretty sure telling him I had Revan crawling around in my body would not go over well.

"I feel like there some sort of evil within me. You know you said something about for Jedi there is some sort of evil watching us and waiting for its chance. I know I sort of blew you off about it but..." I sighed. "I am beginning to think you might be right. I am scared...scared I might do something terrible."

I began to cry and Carth held onto me. He stroked my hair and then calmly stroked my back. "This really is bothering you, isn't it?"

I nodded, and he said, "Is this the reason why you didn't want to get married to me, Phoenix?"

"Partially. Look, Carth I don't want you to get hurt. I love you. I…I did some study with Master Dorak before I left the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine. We talked about the history of Exar Kun and Ulic Qel Droma. Ulic had a brother...he loved him...when he became a Sith Lord...he and his brother fought...in the end, Ulic was so consumed with the Dark Side he murdered his own brother. I….am scared… what if...I fall to the Dark like Ulic and..."

Carth put a finger to my lips. "Don't speak it...Phoenix...don't mention it or even think it. To think it means…"

"Means what, Carth? I love you...what kind of evil dwells within me that would even contemplate something so...monstrous."

Carth kissed me on my lips. "You're not Ulic, Phoenix. You're a good woman...a woman who thinks through her actions and regrets whatever mistakes you make. That is your humanity… You're not Malak. You're not Revan. You have a soul. Never forget that...Phoenix. It's why I love you."

Tears came from my eyes. "You're too good to me, Republic."

Carth smiled. "I know…but…" He chuckled." One thing...Phoenix..."

"Yes..."

"Would you stop calling me Republic?"

I grinned and then looked at him firmly. "Never...I'll call you Republic till the day I die. Besides…calling you Republic has so many memories."

"Good ones I hope."

I chuckled. "Well…waking up in a bed on Taris…let's just say I have a really bad case of falling for my rescuer and nurse…I think there's some sort of psychiatric condition with that."

Carth laughed. "Are you saying you fell for me when you first woke up?"

I giggled like a young school girl. "Maybe…but you didn't exactly make falling for you easy. You were a stubborn idiot."

Carth sighed. "I know…I don't open up well to people. But…" He leaned close to me and our noses touched. "I love you. But… let me get this straight you'll call me Republic over calling me a hairless wookiee or a gamorrean pig man?"

I ruffled my fingers through Carth's hair and then smiled. "You're about as loyal a Republic soldier as they come, Carth. You don't look much like a gamorrean or a wookiee. Nope…Republic suits you."

Carth sighed. "Alright I give up, you win!"

I laughed. "You give up way too easy…Republic."

Carth chuckled. "Well, my little Blackbird, when it comes to you...I am like warm nerf butter in your hands."

"Mmm nerf butter…" I grinned with a lustful look in my eyes. "How about melting into me… once more Republic? You did say something about wanting to treat me like your wife. Besides…I can't think of anything I want to do more before… going on a suicide mission."

"If that's what you want….my little Blackbird then I am happy to oblige."

I laid back down in bed and I groaned as suddenly Carth proceeded to "melt" into me. I moaned.

My comm suddenly began to beep. Frack.

Carth grinned and his hand reached over me and to a dresser close by our bed and switched off the comm. "No interruptions, love."

I raised an eyebrow. Usually, Carth would have been subconscious about letting a comm ring. "But…what if it's important!"

He shrugged and proceeded going back to love making and he stated, "You're important…*to* me."

I groaned in pleasure as Carth continued and I said in between groans, "Gee Republic…isn't…isn't… that a little selfish?"

"Phoenix…stop being a Jedi for once…" He paused mid-sentence and I groaned and he continued. "and…be my wife for a change. "A break in his sentence and I moaned. He stopped and then whispered in my ear. "You are disobeying the Order…when we proceed to…" He continued in his lovemaking, and I gasped. "I try not to think of the Order when…well…"

I coughed, of course; he had to remind me that sex was a taboo in the eyes of the Order. "Shut up…and…keep going at your lovemaking…Republic. "I coughed again. "I don't fracking care what the Order thinks. We've been… _intimate_ since I first became a padawan." I sighed. "But I am not your wife, as much as I want to be and till this mission is over…I still have obligations to the Order. But as soon as this mission is over…and if we both manage to survive this…then…well…we will get married."

Carth draped his body over mine, and he stared intently into my eyes. "Force you're so beautiful…Particularly when you get riled up." He paused and said softly, "Five more minutes…Love. Then we'll go save the galaxy."

"Half an hour…" I kissed Carth on his lips. "Then…" I rubbed my hands through Carth's dark brown hair. "We'll…face everything together."

* * *

 **~Juhani~**

I worried about Bastila there was something off about her within the Force. However, I did not want to pry too much. Emotions and feelings were difficult for me to deal with and as much as I wanted to help her; I could not handle Bastila's turbulent emotions as well. I wondered if Master Quatra had had the same concerns over me before I attacked her and fell to the Dark Side. I missed my master and wished she was around. Although she had been a hard master. I began realizing she wanted me to be prepared for my life without a master. The galaxy around me was stressful enough and filled with such turmoil that any little thing could cause a Jedi to fall to the Dark Side of the Force. My master had done her best to impart that upon me although her training had caused my volatile nature to come forward. I wished I had the forethought to realize what Quatra's lesson was to me. Perhaps if I had, I would have never had fallen…no, I needed to stop second guessing myself. I had been redeemed and was on a mission with Phoenix. She had saved my life twice. Once with Revan and then back on Dantooine. Thinking about Phoenix I decided I needed to talk to her about Bastila and their bond. It was going to be a difficult thing to talk about, but it needed to be discussed. My only problem was finding her and finding her probably meant finding her in the companionship of Carth, her mate. How did I talk about something so personal without making things potentially worse?

Thinking about their relationship made me miss Belaya. She begged and pleaded with me not to go off with Phoenix and I told her I had been given an assignment with the Order. Belaya laid a kiss upon my lips. She told me that our last moments together watching the stars in the fields of Dantooine had been the best moment we had had together. She began crying as if she would never see me again. Of course, that was indeed possible because I knew Phoenix's mission was dangerous. We could all die on this mission, but part of being a Jedi was facing the possibility of our own death.

I wandered the corridors of Manaan looking for where I could find Phoenix and Carth. I slightly dreaded doing this but knew I had to talk to her. Reaching the market and a hotel that seemed quite busy; and the manager or perhaps even the owner of the establishment, an orange-colored twi'lek, shook his head as I entered the hotel. "We have no room…the other hotel in this city is closed…some sort of murder investigation. I thought I'd welcome the business but now…I have no room and have had to turn customers away."

"I do not want a room, sir…I am looking for someone. A woman with raven-black hair and dressed in the style of a Jedi. She would probably be here with a man in a Republic jacket. They are an obvious couple. They might have told you they were just married."

"Oh, those people…yeah…somehow a room opened up for those two…can't explain how that happened."

I chuckled lightly. "I think I know how…"

I knew the stubborn nature of Phoenix and the temptation to use the Force in this instance probably came quickly to her. I couldn't fault her. I knew Bastila had angered her and Carth. Seeing their irate mood back at the ithorian compound, I knew Phoenix and Carth wanted to get away from all of us. I could easily picture Phoenix using the Force, and Carth probably did not bat an eye.

I continued speaking to the twi'lek, "…but it matters little at this moment. I am looking for them."

"And who might you be, cathar? A friend?"

I bowed my head. "I am a companion, a friend, a confidant…I suppose. The woman and the man went away from our…group angry and I wish to…" I paused. "It is difficult to explain. Perhaps sooth bruised feelings."

"Ahh…it is our policy not to allow access to our guests. For obvious privacy and protection issues. In fact, I probably have told you too much to begin with."

I nodded the twi'lek had a point. I sighed. I needed to talk to her and probably soon. I didn't feel like I could wait for Carth and Phoenix to leave on their own. I hated doing this, but I called on the Force. "It is urgent I speak to them…you will tell me what room they are in."

"I can see it's urgent…they are on the 2nd floor. Room 215."

"Thank you."

I left the manager and took an elevator to the 2nd floor. Going past various rooms I found room 215 and I gathered my courage and knocked on the door. I heard voices in the room and a lot of scuffling and finally, the door opened and a wary looking Carth came to the door. He was dressed in what looked like a bathrobe and I kept my features stoic.

It did not take any stretch that Carth and Phoenix had been in an intimate situation earlier. I didn't fret over it not like apparently Bastila had. Carth and Phoenix would do as they wished with or without the approval of any code or council. Yet, I knew once this mission was over…Phoenix and Carth would never bend to any authority. They would do as they wished. Although this moment could be tense, I didn't feel that way. There was a slight sadness that I felt within me, as I knew in my heart that Phoenix would leave the Order after this mission was over. Yet, she was a servant of the Force and once pulled in that direction she would never truly be free. Perhaps Phoenix was aware of that or perhaps she wasn't. Either way, I knew she and Carth had a difficult path ahead of them.

"Juhani…"

His voice seemed cautious of me and he took a stance that looked ready to slam the door in my face. I couldn't fault him if he did.

I bowed my head. "I apologize for coming here, Carth but I came to talk to Phoenix. I know…my coming probably isn't wanted but…" I paused."I am not Bastila. I accept your choices. I know you two have been close…and I know you two wanted to be married. Perhaps that makes me a hypocrite of a Jedi but…it is better to see you two together than apart and miserable."

Carth nodded, and he gave a slight smile. "Phoenix is…getting dressed. She'll be with you in a moment."

I nodded, and a moment of awkwardness filled the air. I didn't know what else to say. I paused thinking over what to say, and said softly, "So Carth…do you plan on having children?"

Carth gave a cheesy grin. "Of course, I want them. I am unsure about Phoenix, though. I think she wants them but…she keeps saying after the mission. I can't blame her…having a kid right now would be hard to deal with. Yet…I keep wondering if she isn't pregnant and trying to hide it from me. "

I frowned. "Why do you think she would hide that? I think if she was pregnant you would be the first to know."

"Because she wouldn't want me to worry…I know Phoenix…and if she found out that during this mission, she was having my child…she'd know I'd fuss over her…and I think she might be hiding somethi…"

I heard a cough and there was Phoenix. Her black hair was frazzled and stuck up and her padawan braid hung from her hair like a limp flag of surrender. Her Jedi robes were wrinkled, and she frowned. "I am not pregnant, Carth. I assure you…I'd tell you the moment I felt something in the Force. Geesh…"

"Well, you could be…Phoenix. I mean…it's not like…we haven't…"

Phoenix's features turned blood red in embarrassment. "Geesh, Carth…do you have to broadcast our…most intimate moments to everyone?"

I felt awkward as I had stepped into a conversation I hadn't meant to create. I sighed. "I…well. I… am here to talk to you, Phoenix."

Phoenix's arms folded and she gave me a hard glance. "Did Bastila send you?"

I shook my head. "She doesn't know I am here."

Phoenix's eyes narrowed. "I don't believe you. It would be just like her to send someone to try apologize for her."

I sighed. "You don't have to believe me. But you do have a bond, a connection with her, Phoenix. If you don't believe me…trust in that connection and see if I am lying."

Phoenix gaze softened. "I have been trying *not* to connect to our bond. I despise it with a passion. I wish we never had a connection. But you have a point…"

Her eyes closed, and she was quiet for a moment and a look of pure revulsion was on her face and then she said. "You're right…forgive me for doubting you, Juhani."

"Phoenix…I wish to speak to you alone…"

She sighed and looked at Carth. "Head back to the Hawk, Republic. I'll join you soon, and we'll get back on our mission and speaking of mission…you'd better check on Mission and see what mischief that girl has gotten into. A few hours on her own and…well…I have a feeling she's probably gotten into some sort of trouble."

Carth chuckled. "You're probably right. Alright, love…I'll get dressed and head back to the Hawk and…see what's going on."

Carth went back into the room and Phoenix looked at me and she stated calmly, "Walk with me…and we will talk."

I nodded, and we proceeded to walk out of the hotel and through Ahto City. The sun was slowly setting over the ocean, and night was coming. I gathered my thoughts and spoke. "I am not sure how to talk about this…but we need to talk about you and Bastila."

Phoenix sighed. "I don't want to talk about Bastila. I…" She paused."My feelings are not the feelings a Jedi should have. I…" Phoenix paused."I have a well of anger…within me. If I reach for that anger…I fear I'll do something I will regret."

I nodded. "She ruined things for you. I understand. But…I know you two…your bond…I smelled Bastila's scent upon you back on Tatooine. Not so much now. I am not ignorant of things. You two obviously…mated with each other and…"

Phoenix turned even redder and she said. "That was a mistake. I…know I shouldn't have…but that bond…and…" She sighed."I love Carth, since…I first saw him on Taris… I know what I have with him is serious. I want a future and a family with him. What happened with Bastila…." Phoenix paused and then groaned. "We were in tight quarters…Bastila has always had feelings for me. It overwhelmed me and the next thing I knew…I acted on what she felt…maybe we both felt something…but her emotions overcame whatever control I had and we both…" She sighed. "I seriously fracked up big time and before you say anything else…we both agreed that we shouldn't…pursue anything ever again…I've let it go but…"

I finished Phoenix's sentence. "But apparently…Bastila has not." I sighed. "That is unfortunate, Phoenix. And with you so close to Carth."

She sighed. "And what's worse is this bond we have. I know her love isn't the same as Carth's. It's possessive. It's like a child wanting a toy. She doesn't love me…or she does but it's not the way love should be. She loves me for…what I am and I can't imagine why. All I have been was a fracking smuggler. I've smuggled spice and contraband weapons. I've trafficked with hutts and various unsavory persons to help others. But...there's nothing glamorous about me or my past. But what I do know is that what she feels is not healthy and I can't live a life with her knowing that, Juhani. I just can't. I know what I have with Carth. His love is special. And…"

Phoenix bowed her head. "I need to tell him all that I've told you…but if I lose him…I...will lose everything that has meaning in my life. And…" The tears came down her face. "I…can't deal with that, Juhani. I know you think I am a strong woman…but I am not. I need Carth in my life. He really is my strength…without him…I…can't…I need…him…I am not strong…I will crumble." She began to sob.

I didn't need to press any further. I understood all too well. She feared that without Carth in her life her fall to the Dark Side would come. I knew how that felt; My own fall after I thought I struck down Master Quatra. I gulped and then embraced Phoenix in a hug. She needed it, I could tell. I paused and also patted her on the back. "Shh…it will be alright, Phoenix. You're a lot stronger than you realize. You saved me from the Dark Side. That took a lot of strength on your own to consider me worthy of saving."

Phoenix sniffed. "But saving you was easy. Your path to redemption was clear to me."

"To you it was. To me…I truly believed my Master was dead and that I had killed her. I was in absolute misery, Phoenix. I believed there was no redemption for me. If you believed that I could be saved then…there is hope for you."

She sighed. "I…but…if Carth finds out the truth…he won't want to be with me. He'll hate me."

"Maybe…but Carth is resilient. You know his past, and he's opened up to you whereas others have failed. He may be angry and resentful at first but…if he loves you as much as you say…he'll forgive you. As for Bastila…she has her own path to make. I think considering all you have been through…you should avoid her as much as possible."

Phoenix snorted. "Like that's going to be easy. She inserts herself into my life as much as possible. She needs to leave me alone, Juhani."

I chuckled. "Then I will make it a point to tell her that you want nothing to do with her."

She smiled. "Thank you, Juhani. I don't know how I am going to tell things to Carth…trying to find the right time…well…"

"That won't be easy, Phoenix but you'll know when the time is right to tell him."

"I don't know how to tell him as well as when the right time to tell him and that's the problem."

I nodded. "I wish I could help you with that…but…"

"It's my mess, and I have to clean it up. Anyway, …we should head back to the Hawk. I have to finish our mission and…this is something that may have to wait until we're done dealing with Malak. I just can't…well…it's hard enough trying to fight Sith and have an honest discussion with anyone. Particularly one of this nature."

"Perhaps…it seems that we are tied up really good with this mission as it is. I wish you the best, Phoenix. It seems that I was wrong about you."

"Wrong? Wrong about what?"

"I thought that following the path of the Light Side…well, you make it look so easy."

Phoenix suddenly laughed. "I make it look easy. I wish it was easy. I struggle just as much as you do."

"That is a…well, it is a relief to hear…well not that you struggle, but…well, I am just glad to hear I am not alone in my struggle against my emotions and…"

She shook her head. "Juhani…being a Jedi doesn't mean we stop being ourselves or that we instantaneously turn off our feelings and emotions. If we deny that which makes us sentients then we will crack. I have noticed that most of the Dark Jedi and Sith we have seen used to be Jedi. Why do you think that is?"

I honestly had no answer, and Phoenix shook her head. "You cracked. You cracked because part of your personality is volatile in nature. You can't help your nature, Juhani. You are from a warrior's race. Yet your master was a cathar and some of the greatest Jedi in the Order have been cathar. But they managed to find a balance between their warrior's heart and their Jedi training. You'll be a great Jedi too perhaps as great as Sylvar and I am sure she struggled as well. But she found her balance as a cathar and a Jedi. If she can find it…so can you."

I frowned. Something about Phoenix's statements did not feel right. I had to remember that the Jedi council told me that Phoenix had been one of Revan's followers at one time. But I thought of her as Phoenix. She believed she was Phoenix and that's what mattered to me. It seemed some part of her still drifted towards not truly being a reborn Jedi. I sighed. "I disagree with you…Phoenix. I mean you do have some valid points but…if I were to give into my volatile nature. I…I…wouldn't be here and you would have had to kill me."

Phoenix sighed. "You're missing the point…Juhani. I am not telling you to give in to the Dark Side. I am telling you to accept who you are and that your anger and volatile nature is part of you. If you accept the part of yourself that is cathar instead of denying it and be as accepting of it as your Jedi training. Well, I believe that once you figure that out, Juhani you will be a powerful Jedi. It's called embracing who you are and by denying it you weaken yourself. Otherwise, you will drift between indecision and uncertainty. There can be no indecision and uncertainty as a Jedi or you will find yourself at the mercy of your enemies."

I nodded pondering over her words. "Sometimes…Phoenix you seem a lot wiser than just a padawan who has barely taken her steps into the Order. You speak like a master or…perhaps a knight."

"Perhaps it is the Force itself that gives me insight…because I don't know where I get these ideas or even my philosophy. It's like the Force whispers it to me…"

She muttered under her breath. "Leave me alone…"

Phoenix suddenly paled and I frowned. "Are you all right, Phoenix?"

I paused there was something strange going on with Phoenix. I had noticed occasionally that her attention occasionally drifted, but then it could have been the injury she had suffered earlier on the Hawk. Bastila had been worried when she had bumped her head on the bunk. Yet, she seemed okay. I wanted to say something about her strange outburst but then thought better of it.

Phoenix turned slightly red. "Uhh sorry…I…I…I talk to myself…it's kind of a bad habit actually."

I raised an eyebrow because it seemed strange that she would comment to herself in such a manner. It was like she was talking to someone else that I could not see or hear. However, Phoenix gave me a look that told me not to inquire any more about it.

* * *

 **~Phoenix~**

 _"Sometimes…Phoenix you seem a lot wiser than just a padawan who has barely taken her steps into the Order. You speak like a master or…perhaps a knight."_

 _"Perhaps it is the Force itself that gives me insight…because I don't know where I get these ideas or even my philosophy. It's like the Force whispers it to me…"_

Revan laughed in my head _. The Force…the Force…seriously is that what you're calling me now to your friends. If they knew where your vaunted wisdom came from…they would be alarmed and disturbed._

 _"Leave me alone…"_

 _"Are you all right, Phoenix?"_

 _"Uhh sorry…I…I…I talk to myself…it's kind of a bad habit actually."_

 _Revan laughed. Now, I am a bad habit like smoking tabac, partaking in spice, or your specialty drinking too much. I should have expected someone like you, a common smuggler to refer to me like a bad habit._

I scowled and switched to internal thoughts to respond to Revan. If you don't shut up. I'll find a way to shut you up, Revan.

 _Oooh…threats…I feel your anger, Phoenix. How much can you bear, before you crack yourself? You speak of such to Juhani but are you strong enough not to crack yourself."_

I ignored Revan and she chuckled _. Ignoring me won't solve your problems. That is what the Order did against the Mandalorians and look what it got them._

Yea it gave the Jedi, you and Malak. And look at the mess that you and Malak caused.

 _Speaking of cracking, one must crack a few eggs to make an omelet Phoenix. The Republic is weak. That's something I eventually found out during the war. They were so weak that it needed me and Malak to protect them._

But you swore to protect the Republic. You broke your oath, Revan!

 _I did not break my oath, Phoenix! The Republic is weak…I did what I had to do for the Republic!_

What do you mean you did what you had to do for the Republic? You broke your oath! You attacked the Republic! Your actions were just as bad if not worse than the actions of the Mandalorians!

 _An omelet, Phoenix._

I scowled, I hated Revan.

 _Do you hate me for my methods or do you hate me because you know I speak the truth?_

Juhani frowned. "Phoenix?"

"Sorry…I think the strain of this mission is starting to get to me."

Juhani looked at me and gave me a sad smile. "Yes…I can only imagine. But we are halfway done…Phoenix. Which reminds me…Jolee needs your help."

I sighed…everyone needed my help. I raised an eyebrow and said in a slight testy tone, "With what?"

"A friend of his is in jail…for murder. I told Jolee you solved a murder on Dantooine and this should be easy for you."

I seriously was getting tired of having people put more assignments and tasks on me. Yet, I did owe Jolee for helping me find the Star Map back on Kashyyyk. I gave a deep painful sigh.

"I'll put it on my list of things to do followed by storming the Sith Embassy."

Juhani frowned. "What? Are you serious?"

"In order to achieve our goals, I have to raid the Sith Embassy for a data core for the Republic. It has some classified Republic information on it. It's not what I want to do, Juhani... but it seems that the Republic Ambassador won't budge unless I do this."

Juhani said softly, "Then I will help you, Phoenix. I'll help you as much as I can."

* * *

 **~Omni~**

The Force was restless. I could feel things shifting but in what direction it was hard for me to determine. I could feel the darkness but at the edge of it was a faint glimmer or a shard of light. What would cause the Force to shift? Some beings that were naturally strong in the Force could cause the Force to sway in such a powerful manner. I doubted it would be me. I was not destined to be a powerful player in galactic events. I was more like a pawn in a game that flowed with those powerful beings. However, it was hard to say what my path or destiny would bring. My time in training to become a battlemaster of the Jedi I had trained to feel the Force in minuscule ways; any little shift could be advantageous in battle or combat. Yet such control or focus of the Force was tedious. It made combat difficult and was akin to battle meditation. A skill I had no patience or skill for. How did one like the Jedi Bastila able to maintain such a skill was beyond me? The true master of such a skill was Nomi Sunrider and Nomi had not been seen in many years.

The rumors were she had died of a broken heart after the death of Ulic Qel Droma. Other rumors included that she had gone into exile choosing to leave the Order after the death of Ulic and she had taken Vima, her daughter with her. Regardless, the Jedi Master had disappeared and had not been seen. Most counted her dead, and one with the Force and that explanation made the most sense. As most doubted that Nomi would have let Malak and Revan rise in power. There were rumors that her daughter Vima had forsaken the main Order and took her own disciples and taught them the ways of the Force. Where Vima was no one exactly knew. Some rumors mentioned Vima might be on Nar Shadda others said she had settled on Katar and had married a Miraluka. No one honestly cared what was truth and what was fiction during this war with the Jedi. As for me, I sat on a transport with a bunch of mercenaries headed for some underwater base on the Hrakert Rift. They were a mixture of humans, twi'leks, and some races that I hadn't seen before. The mercs mostly conversed with each other and I chose to not to participate with them. Their conversations were crude as they kept talking about the entertainment one could find on Nar Shadda. Most of them planned on hitting that moon after this job was done. They mentioned that a twi'lek named Lyn was on Nar Shadda and she was one hell of a dancer.

I quietly sat meditating on the transport and an iridonian zabrak looked at me, curiosity on his features. "Are you a Jedi? We could certainly use one." A remote near him beeped, and he chuckled. "Settle down…now just because we haven't heard from the others sent down there doesn't mean we are in trouble."

I frowned. "No…I am echani and meditation is something I do. Many echani meditate before combat. And you don't look like much of a merc to me."

The iridonian stated, "I am a technician. I was told that a general power failure in the base means a system failure. I figured my skills could be useful down there."

I raised an eyebrow, the man seemed to have a prosthetic of sorts for an arm but it looked a bit like a repulsor field of some sort. "What happened to your arm?"

The zabrak stated, "I got tired of it…kept dropping my hydrospanner. Figured I'd get a new one."

I raised an eyebrow and the zabrak sighed. "Actually, it was a souvenir from the Mandalorian Wars. And I'd rather not talk about it."

"Fair enough."

"So echani…you're a long way from Eshan."

I was quiet for a moment as I pondered what to say to this and then settled on a lie. "I heard the Republic was hiring mercenaries and…I came for the job."

He nodded. "I too have been going from job to job lately myself. My first line of business as soon as we arrive at this base is to get power restored and contact the Embassy. They are desperate to know what's going on."

The submersible finally docked with the base; and as our group entered the base we could hear the dripping of water, flickering lights, and an ominous silence filled what appeared to be an abandoned base. The iridonian shivered. "As quiet as a tomb…"

I didn't like the feel of this one bit. It was too quiet…too eerie. The mercenaries that were hired with me began to gripe and say they wished they had never had hired on with the Republic. They began to say that they thought that a job with the Sith might have been better. I ignored them as they were common rabble and left them to their own complaints. The iridonian seemed to be much better company as he didn't complain as the others were wont to do and he said to me quietly, "You don't suppose the Sith found out about this base and sent operatives to kill everyone…do you?"

I looked around the docking bay. "Not likely. They wouldn't leave the base intact like this. They would have blown it up and then made a big show of it in front of the Manaan authorities. This base…" I paused. "Why have a base like this in the first place? This reeks of Republic overreach. Do you really think the Selkath would like a base like this unless there was some sort of agreement between the Republic and the Selkath? And if there is…it wouldn't go over well with the Sith. And it would end the neutrality that the Selkath supposedly have and make them a target by the Sith. And if they don't know there is a base. Then the Republic is acting illegally. So if it was the Sith…" I paused and then ran fingers through my white hair.

"They would say, 'The Republic is being deceptive…they have an illegal base on your planet. We blew up this base as a favor to you.'"

The iridonian sighed. "You're probably right. So, what do you think happened?"

I shrugged and opened myself to the Force and my external senses. "It smells in here, surely you noticed it as soon as we got off the submersible…and not just the smell of salt water. It smells foul and rank. The area is polluted with death. We should tread carefully. It is hard to say what the cause is. If I had to make an assumption on it, I would say some sort of sickness or disease struck this base; and if there are any survivors, they are in hiding. They fear they will contact the disease. Paranoia and fear are what took down this base more than any other enemy."

The iridonian nodded. "Interesting hypothesis. It would explain why this place looks abandoned. But what sort of plague would cause this?"

A green-skinned twi'lek started whining. "Would you stop talking about death and plagues. It's bad enough that this place has an eerie vibe about it, and you're not helping matters. I mean what if we get sick…what if?"

A loud clanging noise echoed suddenly throughout the base.

The twi'lek hissed, "What was that?"

I shrugged and said to the twi'lek. "Maybe you should go and find out. You are a mercenary…the Republic did hire you to find out."

"Now wait a minute…I didn't sign up for this."

I shook my head. "You are a pathetic excuse for a mercenary, twi'lek. A coward!"

The twi'lek glared at me. "I don't see you going in."

I laughed. "I'll find whatever it is and kill it. You, on the other hand, cower and smell of fear."

The iridonian glared at me. "Echani…that's enough. You're not helping matters. First thing's first we should set up this area as a beachhead."

He looked at the twi'lek. "And you should stay put in case we have to withdraw back to here. You can guard this area and keep us safe."

"I'll get our weapons and establish our main camp here."

The twi'lek nodded and he went back into the submersible to get supplies we had brought with us to the base.

I snorted. "I wouldn't trust the twi'lek with our lives, iridonian. He's as worthless as a rock. He's likely to leave us to die if things on this base go bad."

I hated the twi'lek, he was weak and as far as I was concerned, he should never have been hired. I would have liked killing him but…that would have brought up issues that I didn't want to deal with.

The iridonian said firmly. "Regardless…he is here, echani! And so are you…and if you even consider harming him…you'll have to deal with me!"

"My name is Omni…iridonian!"

The iridonian shrugged. "Alright, Omni…you lead a squad of the mercs into the base. I will go with you."

"It would be nice to know your name other than calling you iridonian all the time!"

"That seems fair. my name is Bao-Dur."

I glared at Bao-Dur. "You have some gumption taking control of this group."

Bao-Dur said calmly, "I am just a tech. I am not a leader…" He paused and his eyes seemed to have a faraway look as if he was recalling something."I know leaders…and you…you could be a leader, if you chose to be. Instead, you pick senseless fights with people. Why?"

His remote beeped alongside him in agreement.

I looked at him and said, "I am not here to be a leader. I am here to earn credits. If it wasn't the fact that we are getting paid, I would not be here. I have zero interest in the Republic and their affairs let alone dealing with you or any of the others here. As soon as we are done here, iridonian, I will finish my business on this planet and then I am leaving this contemptable place."

I stormed off into the base, determined to find whatever was causing this problem in the first place and put an end to it. My senses were fever pitch at this moment and the Force poured within me like fire. I wanted to kill something…if I couldn't kill that lazy good-for-nothing twi'lek or that iridionian, I would find something here to take my aggression on.

I was frustrated; how did I end up in this mess? I came here following after Revan and to exact revenge on Bandon; but the only thing that had happened was I ended up here on a dark and dank base under the oceans of Manaan because I had no credits. I was a Dark Jedi without any sort of organization to follow. A Jedi had the support of the Republic and usually given financial support.

As a Dark Jedi with Revan, Revan supported my efforts and made sure I was properly compensated, but now I was without the support of either group. I am sure Lord Revan was in the same boat. Her resources had all confiscated by Malak. Despite my frustration and anger, I felt isolated and lonely. I needed help somehow. Yet, how…I remembered Rama's words to me regarding Revan. Revan had been altered somehow. What had the Jedi done to her? She didn't even recognize me back on Tatooine. I began wondering if my plans on following Revan was even worth my time and energy. She was lost and I felt lost as well. Was I truly following what the Force wanted of me? I could hear the Iridonian following after me calling my name.

* * *

 **~Bao-Dur~**

There was something unusual about the echani. He claimed he wasn't a Jedi, but I had seen plenty of Jedi during the war, and the way he carried himself was strikingly similar to the Jedi I had seen. I suspected he might be a double agent. I knew so little anymore about the affairs of the Republic, the Jedi or even Republic Intelligence. The echani seemed erratic and he troubled me; he reminded me in a small way of The General after Malachor V. However, I suspected that The General wouldn't have struck out in anger at a skittish twi'lek. The twi'lek was afraid and with good reason. This base looked deserted and as Omni had mentioned it smelled of rot and death.

The echani had clearly had seen combat as he had not seemed phased in the slightest over the state of the base. I wondered if he had served with Revan as The General and I had. It was something to ask him about, but he stormed off in a fit when I inquired why he would pick fights with others. His answer did not satisfy me as he acted conflicted and angry. I went after him. "Omni…stop!"

More noises filled the base, aside from the constant dripping of water. A sense of dread filled me, and I had the feeling somehow, we weren't fully alone and the base wasn't completely abandoned.

The echani stopped and gave me a look filled with contempt. "Leave me alone…"

I looked at him incredulously. "You're not thinking right, Omni." I sighed, I wasn't sure if I should press about his loyalties but decided that maybe I should. I took a breath and then stated, "You're a spy…aren't you?"

Omni frowned and then suddenly laughed. "A spy! Is that what you think I am?"

"You're obviously a Sith… why are you here?"

Omni bowed his head and muttered something; probably an echani curse but then said firmly, "It's complicated, Bao-Dur. I hold no loyalty to the current Dark Lord of the Sith. And he would probably kill me…because I won't swear loyalty to the usurper of my master."

I gulped. I wondered if Omni would kill me because he was a Sith and apparently, he had been loyal to Revan. It seemed a bit odd, and I voiced this. "But…I thought all the Sith swore allegiance to Malak. I mean…not swearing to serve Malak…isn't that a death sentence?"

Omni glared angrily at me and then said bitterly, "Why do you think I am here? Malak wouldn't have me even if I did. I was too close to Revan. He'd kill me anyway…"

I felt somewhat sorry for the guy. "How…umm close were you to Revan if you think Malak would kill you?"

Omni sighed. "Revan was my master, Bao-Dur. She saw to my instruction personally."

She? I frowned. "But Revan was a man…"

He laughed. "Ahh…that's what she wanted people to think. She thought it was funny, actually. She had a sense of humor… if you must know. I…" Omni paused. "I would never presume to…" He sighed. "And I suppose now I have done so… but I would never betray her confidence. She was my master and I served her…no…perhaps I worshiped her. She was power…and I was but her loyal servant."

I frowned, the echani seemed a bit deranged to the point that he called Revan a woman. He acted like Revan was some sort of god. But then Revan had been the Dark Lord of the Sith and…well…Sith tended to think of their Dark Lords as if they were divine. It seemed somewhat flawed to me and Omni…seemed…well… mentally unstable. But weren't most of the Sith? It wasn't as if I spent that much time with someone connected to the Sith. Yet, I decided not to question Omni's sanity as that might be like messing with a rancor. Poke or prod at it too much and you might get killed.

I changed the subject quickly. "At this point, Omni I don't care about your loyalties. This base…it feels wrong. Something is wrong here. If you are a Force user then you can help."

There suddenly were screams and I cringed. Omni's lightsaber was drawn and a double blade ignited, it was bright crimson. I raised an eyebrow; the General had also wielded a double blade at one point but it had been a silver blade. Omni went running back to the docking point but we were halted by a security door that was locked. I followed after him and heard Omni cursing in Echani. He then switched to Basic and was looking at the twi'lek we had been with earlier, "Stupid twi'lek have you realized what you have done?"

The twi'lek stated firmly, "I just saved our lives."

Omni snorted. "Wrong…you have trapped us here. We're locked in this base and…you have sentenced us all to death. We can't get back to the submersible and…"

"Look, you didn't see what happened. There were selkath and…they swarmed all around us like…like piranha and…they…literally ate the rest of the mercs. Their eyes…they were deranged… It was horrible… absolutely horrible. I locked us in to keep us safe."

Omni shook his head. "So, you're telling me that peaceful selkath swarmed and…acted like a bunch of rabid kath hounds and ate the rest of our crew."

The twi'lek insisted. "I am telling you the truth."

I nodded. The echani had a point because why would selkath attack, they seemed rather pacifistic than most races. But Omni glared at the twi'lek. "And you've condemned us to a slow death rather than a short one…you stupid, pathetic twi'lek…give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you!"

I sighed. "Because we need him, Omni."

Omni glared at me. "Need him…he's absolutely useless. What good is he?"

I looked at the twi'lek and sighed. "He managed to survive a bunch of deranged selkath…and I am willing to bet he could survive another attack."

Omni snorted. "By being a coward! He obviously ran when the rest of the Mercs faced a bunch of insane selkath. He let them die rather than…"

I held up my good arm and said. "He still survived and that's what counts; because we're going to have to go deeper into this base and find another way out or a way to contact the Republic. He will stay here and let any new merc teams come and know we are in need of a rescue."

I wondered if that would pacify the echani. Seeing how he wasn't the most stable of individuals. I watched as Omni ran his hands through his white hair. I wondered if he wasn't thinking about killing both of us and going through the base on his own.

The twi'lek looked at both of us and then added, "I…I am not going through that base…not after what I saw. I'd just as soon as have you kill me than go through that base."

Omni shook his head; he looked at both of us and closed his eyes for a moment as if he was again pondering his options. "Alright…this contemptable coward stays…against my better judgement…but…" He sighed. "My master…I must follow her ways, and she didn't always kill others even if I could sense that she wanted to…she would have said that this wretch has some purpose…like the one, you have mentioned. He will live…for now…but…if he displeases me one more time…he will die."

I let out a sigh of relief, but Omni's assessment seemed very Revanesque. After all, I had served in Revan's Corps and served under one of his generals. Revan could easily make similar decisions like this. However, Omni still insisted calling Revan a woman but I was convinced that he was short a few cogs in his brain somewhere. I had to be careful because I was convinced Omni could become violent if I challenged his delusions.

He beckoned me to follow him, and I did but I kept a slight distance away, I wasn't going to take any chances with a mentally disturbed Force user. I remembered that sad day after I had activated the Mass Shadow Generator, the General didn't speak, just nodded and a pained look on his face. The General had been a stoic sort of man, he tried to hide his emotions that fateful day. I asked him if Revan was coming and the General shook his head negatively, but I could see the sadness and pain in his eyes. Revan wasn't coming, and I could see the General struggling not to mentally crack. I wondered if Omni held similar pain within him. If he did, he did a better job at hiding it then the General did.

He looked at me and my tiny remote and said, "Is that remote good for anything else aside from being a floating object that follows you around?"

I chuckled. "He helps me with repairs and often singes the pants of people that annoy me."

Omni laughed and then said in an amused tone, "Do I annoy you, Bao-Dur?"

I paused in thought and then answered. "Do you annoy me? No…but to be honest, you trouble me, Omni. I don't pretend to understand you. But it seems that we are stuck together. I am not sure if…well, if you intend to help me…or kill me."

Omni was quiet and then spoke, "You are far more capable as a tech and a leader then that pathetic twi'lek. You are useful and important. I kept him alive because I would have lost your support in getting off this base and I have no skill in trying to get this base even marginally operational so we can get off of it. I believe you can give us an edge in survival. You made that twi'lek important. My question is why?"

I contemplated my answer and then said. "I told you before I fought in the Mandalorian Wars. I was there at that last battle I saw so many people die…I don't want to see others…"

Omni laughed. "You can't stop people from dying, iridonian. It is inevitable. War is the ultimate realization of oneself. It shows people's true natures. You are weak…and instead of becoming stronger from the war…you broke. You worry about insignificant lives when there is a much larger picture to consider."

I glared at Omni in anger. How dare he accuse me of being weak! I had created a weapon that ended a war, but I regretted it. It had caused so much death it made me feel sick inside. I wanted to fight him. How could he be such a prick? However, Omni was echani, maybe he wanted me to fight him so he could get a sense of who I was through combat. "We don't have time for this…we need to get off this base."

Omni laughed once more. "Pathetic…I have heard that iridonians were warriors and fighters and you choose not to engage me, but…" He sighed. "You are right, we do need to focus on getting off this base."

Omni paused and his lightsaber ignited. "Stay behind me…Bao-Dur…something is coming…I feel it…."

I watched as Omni suddenly rushed into the darkness of the base the glimmer of his lightsaber blazing. I could see a glint of fire within his eyes. I followed close behind him to see him slice and hack away at selkath with reckless abandon. The selkath hissed and surrounded him and I couldn't see Omni and I feared the worse. He might have been gifted with the Force, but…that didn't mean he was invulnerable. I had seen Jedi die and despite how I felt about Omni, he didn't deserve to die. I looked at my remote. "Looks like we're going to have to help him."

I took a blaster that I normally carried off from my holster, took a deep breath and rushed into combat…

* * *

A/N: Well…this chapter took a lot to come up with…I kept writing and then deleting and then some. I was going to have a Carth POV or even a Bandon POV but decided to end with Omni and Bao-Dur. A rather interesting pair-up to be sure.

Life has been crazy and updating my story hasn't been too much of a priority actually. But I try and write just a few sentences when I feel up to it.

Thanks to all my reviewers…seeing people post reviews helps me continue writing and seeing people simply favoring or liking or looking for updates means I am not posting something in the void and that there are people that are actually reading and enjoying this…

Thanks to all of you.


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